Episode 183: How can you break free from being busy?

Summary

The Smart Communications Podcast: Episode 183 Summary Title: How Can You Break Free from Being Busy? Host: Farrah Trim Peter Guest: Kashana Palmer Release Date: April 2, 2025

---

Introduction

In Episode 183 of The Smart Communications Podcast, host Farrah Trim Peter engages in a transformative conversation with renowned author, coach, and fundraising expert, Kashana Palmer. The episode delves deep into the pervasive issue of busyness within nonprofit organizations and personal lives, offering actionable strategies to reclaim time, achieve balance, and foster a culture of wellness.

Guest Background

Kashana Palmer is a multifaceted professional known for her expertise in collaborative leadership and team building within the nonprofit sector. She is an author, certified fundraising executive, podcaster, keynote speaker, and coach. Kashana emphasizes the importance of leveraging talent at all organizational levels to cultivate vibrant philanthropic cultures. Her dynamic personality is likened to a blend of Claire Huxtable and Blanche Devereaux, adding a relatable and charismatic touch to her professional endeavors.

The Origin of "Busy is a Four Letter Word"

Kashana Palmer recently authored "Busy is a Four Letter Word: A Guide to Achieving More by Doing Less," which serves as the focal point of the episode's discussion. Farrah introduces the book by highlighting its mission to help individuals ditch chaos, focus on what truly matters, and embrace a balanced life.

Notable Quote:

“This is not a productivity book, nor is it a time management book.” – Kashana Palmer [02:28]

Kashana clarifies that her book transcends traditional productivity advice. Instead, it addresses the underlying causes of perpetual busyness, particularly within the nonprofit landscape, and provides a roadmap for sustainable achievement without burnout.

Overachiever Culture and Burnout

Kashana shares her personal journey, revealing how her relentless pursuit of success led to physical and mental exhaustion. She describes herself as having run a "marathon at a sprint speed," resulting in premature aging and health issues.

Notable Quote:

“I was running this marathon at a sprint speed, and my body was literally breaking down.” – Kashana Palmer [03:35]

This realization prompted her to reassess her approach to work and life, ultimately inspiring her to slow down and prioritize what truly matters. Kashana emphasizes that the culture of chasing accolades and constant achievement, often ingrained from childhood, is a significant contributor to burnout.

Seeking Validation Through Achievement

The conversation delves into the psychological aspects of busyness, particularly how seeking validation and love through achievements can be detrimental. Kashana highlights the societal expectation to constantly perform and achieve, which often leads to self-neglect.

Notable Quote:

“Achievement and love conflate, right? So that you start performing for that affection.” – Kashana Palmer [07:15]

This conflation of love and achievement drives individuals to remain on the "hamster wheel," perpetually busy without meaningful progress or personal satisfaction.

Self-Maintenance vs. Self-Care

A significant portion of the episode explores the distinction between self-maintenance and self-care. Kashana uses personal anecdotes to illustrate how routine self-maintenance activities can evolve into meaningful self-care rituals.

Self-Maintenance:

• Daily skincare routines
• Regularly getting nails done

Self-Care:

• Turning off the phone to disconnect
• Creating a relaxing environment with candles and music during self-care activities

Notable Quote:

“Self maintenance for me is also making sure that my skincare is on point.” – Kashana Palmer [11:57]

Kashana emphasizes that while self-maintenance keeps one functioning, self-care restores and rejuvenates, enabling individuals to show up more fully in their personal and professional lives.

The Five Star Wellness Plan

Kashana introduces her comprehensive Five Star Wellness Plan, inspired by Gallup’s employee engagement framework. This plan is designed to help individuals prioritize different aspects of their well-being based on their current life season.

1. Physical Wellness and Well-Being:

   • Creating a conducive physical environment
   • Maintaining bodily health

2. Mental Wellness and Well-Being:

   • Engaging in activities like journaling, meditation, or yoga
   • Seeking professional support when needed

3. Spiritual Wellness and Well-Being:

   • Establishing a grounding touchstone outside oneself
   • Engaging in spiritual or reflective practices

4. Financial Wellness and Well-Being:

   • Gaining autonomy and control over personal finances
   • Overcoming scarcity mindset

5. Community Wellness and Well-Being:

   • Cultivating meaningful relationships and community connections
   • Assessing and enhancing one’s social support network

Notable Quote:

“Pick a one. Something is really sticking out there that you're like, oh hell. And that's your one.” – Kashana Palmer [21:00]

Kashana advises focusing on one aspect of the wellness plan at a time to create a domino effect, enhancing overall well-being and reducing the sense of being perpetually busy.

Work-Life Synergy vs. Work-Life Balance

Challenging the conventional notion of work-life balance, Kashana introduces the concept of work-life synergy. She likens balance to a pirate ship ride, emphasizing that true harmony comes from integrating all aspects of life to work together seamlessly.

Notable Quote:

“Synergy is about bringing all those pieces back into that integration.” – Kashana Palmer [22:07]

Work-Life Balance:

• Often perceived as a tightrope act, attempting to manage work and personal life separately.

Work-Life Synergy:

• Integrating work and personal life so that they complement and enhance each other.
• Creating systems where personal well-being and professional responsibilities support one another.

Kashana provides a practical example from her experience managing fundraising and communication teams. By acknowledging personal holidays and planning organizational activities around them, she fosters a supportive work environment that respects individual needs, thereby promoting synergy.

Practical Applications for Nonprofits

Kashana shares actionable strategies for nonprofit leaders to implement work-life synergy within their organizations:

• Mapping Personal and Organizational Calendars:

  • Integrate personal holidays and important dates into the organizational calendar.
  • Plan campaigns and activities around these dates to ensure team members are not overburdened.

• Staggered Time Off:

  • Schedule staff vacations and personal time in a way that ensures continuity of operations.
  • Use periods of low activity to focus on operational tasks and planning.

• Modeling Self-Care:

  • Leaders should demonstrate self-care practices to encourage their teams to do the same.
  • Creating a culture where taking time for oneself is valued and supported.

Notable Quote:

“What I do is ... we come back and we put all of the federal holidays ... and then we start to lay on top of it, the events, the activities, the campaigns, the rollouts.” – Kashana Palmer [25:07]

These strategies not only prevent burnout but also enhance team morale and productivity by respecting individual well-being.

Key Takeaways

1. Redefine Busyness: Recognize that constant busyness is not a badge of honor but a symptom of deeper issues related to validation and self-worth.

2. Differentiate Self-Maintenance and Self-Care: Understand the distinction between routine upkeep and restorative practices that replenish your energy and focus.

3. Adopt a Wellness Plan: Implement a structured approach to wellness by focusing on physical, mental, spiritual, financial, and community well-being tailored to your current life season.

4. Embrace Work-Life Synergy: Move beyond the elusive goal of balancing work and life by integrating them into a harmonious and mutually supportive relationship.

5. Lead by Example: As a leader, modeling self-care and respectful scheduling can transform organizational culture and prevent burnout among team members.

Closing Advice

Kashana Palmer leaves listeners with empowering advice to take control of their schedules and prioritize their well-being:

Notable Quote:

“You have everything you need to be successful right now. You hear me? Everything you need.” – Kashana Palmer [28:32]

She encourages individuals to listen to their instincts, decline unnecessary obligations, and cultivate self-care practices as essential components of a fulfilling and effective life.

Conclusion

Episode 183 of The Smart Communications Podcast offers profound insights into breaking free from the culture of busyness. Through Kashana Palmer’s expertise and personal experiences, listeners gain valuable tools to prioritize well-being, foster meaningful work-life integration, and cultivate a sustainable path to success in both personal and professional realms. This episode is a must-listen for nonprofit leaders and anyone seeking to navigate the complexities of modern-day busyness with grace and intention.

Transcript

[Farrah Trim Peter]

This is the Smart Communications.

[Kashana Palmer]

Smart Communications.

Smart Communications Podcast.

[Farrah Trim Peter]

Developing the voices.

[Kashana Palmer]

Voices.

[Farrah Trim Peter]

Developing the voices of determined nonprofits brought.

[Kashana Palmer]

To you by Big Duck.

Welcome to the Smart Communications Podcast. This is Farrah Trim Peter, co director and worker owner. Today we're going to ask the question, how can you break free from being busy? And I am delighted to talk with Kashana Palmer. I first met Kishana, I don't know, probably about five, ten years ago somewhere around the nonprofit conference circuit, and had the pleasure of being on a panel together at the association of Fundraising Professionals, New York City chapter's fundraising day in 2019, where Kishana literally got between Chris Tuttle and I in a session about getting your teams to stop fighting like cats and dogs. We even had live cats and dogs with us. You had to be there. It was a thing. But let me tell you a little more about Kishana. Kasana uses she her pronouns and is an author, coach, trainer, podcaster, keynote speaker, and a certified fundraising executive. She is the foremost expert on the future of collaborative leadership and building thriving, high performing teams. She's an evangelist in her belief that having amazing talent is the number one competitive advantage in your organization. And her focus ensures that talent found at the highest and lowest levels of an organization can build the most vibrant cultures of philanthropy. Like me, Kashana also holds a deep appreciation of pop culture and describes herself as Claire Huxtable meets Blanche Devereaux. Quite the winning combination. Kashana, welcome to the show. Hey.

Hey. Thank you for having me. I was just like, ooh, this is so delicious. I love it.

Love, love a good intro. So, Kishana, you recently published a book that is really gonna drive our conversation today. The book is called Busy is a Four Letter Word, A Guide to Achieving More by Doing Less. In the book, you invite readers to ditch the chaos and focus on what truly matters by embracing balance and reclaiming your time. Yeah. Now, many of us have heard the advice from many productivity experts to work smarter, not harder. Let's talk about it. What is this book all led you to write it? And how is it different and better than all that other advice that's out there?

So I would say, first of all, this is not a productivity book, nor is it a time management book. So if that's what folks are signing up for, just the unsigned, okay, that's not right because I have not figured out that part and I've given up on that. But what I will say is what caused me to really sit down and write this book is that I Realized that over the course of my career and then my journey through motherhood that I. That, like, overachiever situation was not actually a compliment, which is why I now say high achiever, because that is a compliment. But that I was running this race, that I'm not actually sure if I were, like, who asked me to run the race or what race I was in. And I have been known to say, what are we running from? Every time somebody's like, oh, you want to run a 5k? Why? So I was running this marathon at a sprint speed, and my body was literally breaking down. Like, I'm having this metabolic age of, like, you know, somebody who was in their late 50s and 60s, and I'm a 30 year old. Like, that's not making sense. And so I decided that if I was going to have a shot at achieving some of the things that I wanted to achieve on my terms, and I didn't really start figuring out what that was until I was in my early 40s, that I was gonna have to slow my roll. Because the way that I was doing it when I was raising my child as a solo mom in New York City was not going to cut it in this next season of my life, where I sent her off to college, I moved to a new city. You got to rebuild your network, your friends network, your community. I mean, like, that's a lot, right? That immediately somebody's head is spinning right now. They're like, pack what box? So I still have boxes I have.

To unpack from when I moved into my apartment 15 years ago. But whatever, we'll get to that another day.

Listen, no judgment, okay? I embrace it. And you.

No judgment. Only love here. That's right.

So that's basically what caused me to, like, kind of sit down. And then what gave me space to write was that my business hit an unexpected and damn near catastrophic, like, skid, like. And it was in that pause that I decided to. Once I got over, like, the anger, you know, I went through my five stages of grief. I don't know if I went through all five, but let me tell you something. I hovered in anger for a long time, okay? But somewhere in there, I said, oh, no, this is going to be an opportunity for me to reset the game and reset the board and what would need to be true for me to be able to do that? So what have I learned so far so that I do not get knocked on the head with the same lesson again? And that created the space for me to be able to put pen to paper and I'll say one more thing. My daughter, right before she went to college, the Queenager.

But now she's still a Queenager because I followed the exploits on social media.

Oh, no.

She's gonna need a new nickname.

She's a new nickname. I need to crowdsource this. What do we call the Queen? Asia. When she turns 20, I got nothing. So the reality was that she said to me, mom, you working yourself too hard. Like, and for any of us who have kids who. Or nieces, nephews, got kids who are in that, like, late teens, early 20s, they are looking at us real crazy, like, I don't want to do that. And we think that they're lazy or that they don't want to do anything. They're too entitled. And it absolves us from the responsibility fair of, like, you know, we did this to these babies. Okay, we did that. So all of that hit me at once, and I just had to put pen to paper.

Great. Well, in addition to both of us being Gen Xers, right, We grew up in the 70s and 80s. We were, you know, in that time, we were rewarded for being in leadership positions, winning awards in schools, and then that just, like, came into the workplace. And I think in your book, you refer to that as chasing gold stars.

Gold star for Kiss.

That's right. That's right. My fridge is covered with them. Now. With the constant celebration of achievement over rest, how does that lead to burnout? How do we begin to challenge that? Being in the rat race nonstop going, going, going and doing that. Many of us are just used to operating it on, to just being.

So I have a friend, Timmy, who she. Let me say something, that she is a true energizer, buddy. I don't know where her source of energy comes from. It comes deep within the well of her purpose, because the way she is able to navigate the number of obligations that she has with grace. And she enjoys it, right? She does not complain about the stuff. And partly we're the same age, so she was taught not to complain. But also because that's actually how she's built. I could. Shawna, am I built that way? All of my busyness and activity was driven from my desire to please. And I think many of us, whether you grew up in the most stable home environment ever or you grew up in something that was tumultuous, we were seeking validation and love from our parents was attached to achievement. So it makes achievement and love conflate, right? So that you start performing for that affection. And let us not pretend that we are not seeking affection at work. Let us not pretend. And so to me, work. One of the things that really made me say, you got to get off this rat race is that I was like, how much money am I spending on supposed preventative care? But it felt like maintenance to keep my body pain, my mental anguish, my financial stress at a low hum of stress as opposed to figuring out strategies to like not actually engaging that way. So I had to pull up, Farah. Like I pulled up from what my parents thought. I went back and asked my mom, why did you want me to go to college? She said, cuz you're supposed to. And I want you to know that in the 90s when I was applying to go to college, that was the, that was the response then too. The lady has not changed in 30 odd years. Okay, there. So I had this idea. My parents did not know what the heck they wanted me to be. I other than safe, insecure. And for them that meant get a good job, find a good partner, buy a house, love Jesus, have babies if your body can do it. And that was the end. There was no other way. And so as a firstborn, oldest child, oldest girl, first in family to go to college, first in family to have my own business, first in family to get an advanced degree of my generation because my youngest uncle, my dad's youngest brother is actually literally first. There was no real roadmap. So I thought that they knew what they were doing. They ain't know nothing.

Nothing.

And then when Saniyah was like 15, 14 maybe 14, 14, right before she went to high school, we got into this big, you know, when the kids, when you're in middle school, Farah, these kids are like aliens, okay? So shout out to every parent who has a middler right now. Your children are aliens. They smell weird, they act funny, they a little bit psychopathic and, and just pray for yourself, okay? Stick with them though, because they will come out on the other side. So I remember me saying to her one day like in frustration, look kid, I don't know what I'm doing either, okay? I'm growing up at the same time as you, okay? And don't let any adult tell you they know what they're doing. We don't know. I'm just figuring it out. And she said to me now as a young, a young person in college, that, that day she started to give me so much grace. And she still does because she remembers me saying, I don't know. And so what? I want to encourage folks who think that they need to have all the answers, which is what keeps us on that hamster wheel. Free yourself by saying, I don't know. I don't know. Why are you at that event? I don't know. I don't know. Me stay home. Why do you want that award? I don't know. Like, I guarantee you, Farrah, if you ask yourself the why this maybe five, six days and you say, I don't know. If you don't know, stay home. You don't need it.

I love it.

You don't want it. FOMO is real. So anyway, yes.

It sounds like the first step is just sort of like challenging assumptions. Challenging what's like the ingrained beliefs in the voices in your head that keep telling you to do the thing, chase the thing. Like, wait a minute, do I still need to listen to you?

Correct.

Yeah.

And the answer is no, you don't.

Exactly. Right. No.

Their time is up.

I know we were talking about, you know, this isn't about necessarily productivity. It's just about, again, challenging what we've been told. And a lot of what we've been told in the world of burnout prevention tells people to take care of themselves and says, you know, look at self care. And a lot of that might be some quick fixes, some short term and immediate solutions, like getting a massage, which is my favorite form of quick fix. Self care when I can, or maybe taking a quick trip. You in your book talk a lot about the difference between self maintenance versus self care.

Yep.

And the kind of actions people can take to actually prioritize self care. So can you talk about what that's about? Like, what is self maintenance versus self care and what have we? Maybe again, it's about, you know, I think so much of what you have to say is about retreading your brain.

That'S exactly what it is.

And like telling yourself some different stories. But let's talk about that.

So for me, self maintenance are the things that I do for myself to just keep myself at that steady hum. So for me, that looks like. And somebody's going to laugh, but I'm just telling you, probably one of my few joys in life, which is getting my nails done. And I've been getting my nails done since I was 14 years old, y'all.

Okay.

And I'm a big grown woman now. That's back when acrylic was so dangerous that you had to put the mask on. I mean, it was terrible. So for me, it is self maintenance because that is a part of my image. It's A part of who I am. It actually really is a part of who I am. What will up it to self care is when I turn off my phone where I'm not looking at emails, you know, you're peeking over while you're getting your nails done. Well, I'm actually in conversation with my nail tech, who I adore, where I bring my little lunch. And if she takes longer than the two hours that it normally takes, because I get nail art every time. You're like, two hours? Holy crap. Yeah, sometimes longer.

Okay.

This nail art is serious business. So for me, that's what ups it from maintenance to care. It's the ritual that I do when I go there. I turn off my phone, I dress a certain way, I bring my certain drink. I always do it on this day. Self maintenance for me is also making sure that my skincare is on point. And I have a daily skincare routine that folks are like, why does your skin always look so good? Like, I don't really wear makeup. I'm like, because my skin routine is serious, okay? I don't play these games. What takes it from self maintenance? Making sure that my skin looks good because I have to wear makeup because I'm on stage all the time to self care is every Sunday. You will find me locked in the bathroom. I have a TV in my bathroom. And don't judge me, people. I have a TV in my bathroom. Yes, I do. And I have my steamer and I have my little chair that I have and all my products laid out and I have my little TV going, or the music going, look, I set the stage, my candles are going. I am relaxed. I put on my nice robe. Okay, Farrah, It's a vibe. It's a vibe because I believe in everyday luxuries. So am I using fancy products of. No. No, I don't. I've had one or two skincare products that I just don't even talk about how much I pay for them. But for the most part it is regular Degla stuff. But what ups the game for me to that care, right? The maintenance is I take care of my skin every day. The care is the ritual piece that I get to add in and you get to decide what makes something ritual. What makes of my girlfriends her self care? She drinks coffee, okay? Just like me. She's a coffee drinker, but she has a very specific way she does her pour over every day and I am obsessed with that. My ritual is to go to Starbucks because that's the only time I really see people every Day unless I'm on the road. Right. And so differentiating between the things you need to do for yourself every day for your general upkeep and the things you need to do for yourself to refuel, how you show up in the world, those to me are different. Sometimes they are the same activity, but the time and care and attention, running in to get a, to get a 30 minute manicure because you got to run out to go pick up the kids, that to me is not self care, that's maintenance. When you can decompress and take your time, that goes into care for me. And so how do we introduce care into our regular everyday routine? And for me, that's with my five star wellness plan.

Well, there's the segue. I was just about to ask you about that. Right. Because I think, I love that you have lots of ideas in the book about what people can do and particularly the wellness plan. And I'm just wondering if you can talk a little bit about, you know, what does it look like for people to design their own five star wellness plans? And what does it look like for people when they start making more time for dreaming and less time for doing.

Ooh, come on. And dreaming. It was hard even for me. Like I have to literally leave my house, leave my environment. Some people they have to go touch a tree, right? They have to touch grass. Some people they have to go touch rock. Some people have to go touch sand, some people have to go touch water. Our ability to be able to connect with the element that brings us back to ourself is a part of plan. Okay, so I'll start there. The reason that I talk about five star wellness is because it actually comes from Gallup. I'll give that attribution. Gallup has like five ways that you can deepen employee engagement. What would need to be true in the workplace? So everything I talk about in my book fair, how you do one thing in my mind is how you do lots of things. And so the reason I focus so much on your personal development is because I believe that personal development is professional development. And if you are dealing with some mess at the house, let me tell you what you bring into that to that office. Let me tell you what you bring into your team, Let me tell you what you bring into your clients. Okay. To your donors, mess. And so for me, I adapted it to say there are five things that I want us to be able to think about. One, your physical wellness and well being. And that for me is both your dwelling. How is your physical environment, is it set up for you to be well. Okay. The second thing is your vessel. We only got but the one. So what do you need in this season of your life? Not for the rest of your life, just this season that will allow you to focus on saying to yourself, I feel well, I feel, you know, I'm alright in here, I'm doing all right. I'm looking around things like, but I'm feeling good in my body, I'm feeling good in my space. The second thing is your mental wellness and well being. And that for me is do you have a board of directors, one of the people on there that you pay to talk to you about what's going on up there in Yanaga? Do you have an outlet? And there's tons of different tactics, right, Ferris, we're talking about from all the different experts. So there's the journaling and the meditation and the mindfulness and the yoga and the this and the debt. I don't care what your modality is.

I love acupuncture.

See, I still haven't tried it.

Farrell, we'll talk about it. Do it.

Okay, okay. All right. All right. You like my fifth brand? Who has said to do this? Now?

See, it's all, it's all a sign.

And for you was that care or maintenance or both?

Well, admittedly it's probably more in maintenance mode these days, but I can make it into care soon enough again.

No, no, it doesn't have to. You can be like how I maintain is this thing. It doesn't have to. No requirements. Okay, so then there is your spiritual wellness and well being. And for me, what that looks like is what is the thing that outside of yourself is your grounding stone, right? Like what is your touchstone? So I don't care if it's Jehovah, Jireh, Hare Krishna, bees, trees, if you're Wiccan, I don't care what the thing is. Right, but do you have a center outside of yourself that you can come back to, to commune with, to have conversation with? To me, I think that is really, really important. The fourth thing is financial wellness and well being. And I think particularly for folks who identify as women and queer folk, really, and particularly in our sector, let go of this idea that, well, you know, we work a nonprofit so we're not supposed to make any money. Boo hoo. What are you talking about? So we have to be able to, to grab back our autonomy, our agency and our power as it relates to our finances. And I am not immune. Having grown up in the social sector. And also having been somebody who was fortunate to actually earn a good salary, I still suffered from the same scarcity disease. Okay. I really did and still do some days. So I'm in a season of my life era where I am really focusing on my financial wellness and well being because that is the domino that if it tips in the wrong direction, it affects everything else. And then last but not least because I'm curious where you think you got to focus in on this season of your life is your community wellness and well being. For me that means being willing first to take a self assessment, how am I showing up for the crew and then being willing to say who belongs here in this season of life for me and to understand that you need time, you need proximity, and as Mel Robbins would say, you need energy as well to think about the three components that are necessary to have good friendships. Right. And so whether that's your business relationships, whether that are your personal relationships, your civic relationships, familial, you get to decide. So my word of the year, this year has been all about cultivation. And it's because I realized that my move disconnected me from the community I already had and it made me aware that some of my connections were not that strong. So I got to dial back in. So out of the five, those are my two that I am in this particular season really having to dig into. So what I try to do with the five star wellness is give you your power back until you don't got to do all those things. Just pick a one. Okay.

All right, all right.

Something is really sticking out there that you're like, oh hell. And that's your one. And that's what's going to be the domino that's going to help knock over the other dominoes to have that effect of wellness and well being for you in this season of your life.

Yeah, I appreciate that it is seasonality or seasonal I should say, because I can imagine needing all of these things all the time. I think for now, for me in 2025, with everything that is happening in this country, working from home for the past four years, I'm feeling the last one in particular that community piece and in all the relationships where with my family, with the, my colleagues, with people I work with in the sector, you know, with the community, with my friends, you know, and, and really cherishing, cherishing that time, that's ones really showing up. I want to note you mentioned Gallup and we will link to the employee engagement work they've done. And for those who were wondering, the Five drivers that they come to is purpose, development, a caring manager, ongoing conversations, and a focus on strengths.

That's right.

So you can see how all these things weave together. So for people who want to dive into that again, we'll make sure to link to it now. You know, I've seen people start to rethink the idea of work life balance and talking more about work life harmony, which I've been kind of latching onto for the past few years, and you take it further and talk about work life synergy. And I'm curious if you can talk about what you mean by that phrase and. And maybe share some examples that might be applicable for those who are working in or with nonprofits to move toward achieving work life synergy.

So one of the first things I want folks to let go of is this idea of balance, okay? When I think of balance, I close my eyes, I think of the circus and folks on the tightrope, and they just wibbling and wobbling and walking slowly. Now, I'm the kid that was running by the time I was probably one, right? Like, so this idea of balance does not make sense to me. And so I want to bring all of us back, some of us gonna laugh, to your favorite amusement park as a kid. And all across all of the states and in several countries, there is this ride, the pirate ship ride, right? And you get on this pirate ship ride, and it swings like a pendulum up and down. And so when it first starts fair, it just starts in that little middle, right? And you get the little whoosh in your belly, but you're not going anywhere, really. And then it starts to really pull up, and then you get a whoo, a deeper whoosh coming down. And then for its final act, it stands in place up at the top, and you're like, is this the end?

I'm feeling it in my stomach right now, okay?

That is work life balance for me. So instead, I just want to accept. And if you accept the visual, so folks who are listening, just go along with me on the visual. What I want to bring forward to you is when you are in synergy, that means for all of us who are. Listen, I'm a date myself. Is when the Voltrons come together, okay? All the parts lock up. Do, do, do, do. Synergy is about things working together in concert, which means you cannot ignore your home life. You must be clear about your priorities at work. And I think what happens when we try to do balance, we try to do balance, but we are not clear. We are fuzzy and just Feeling our way through it, just trying to make it. So if you've ever heard yourself saying, I'm just trying to make it through the day, I'm just maintaining, you know, I'm just here, you know, I'm just trying to keep my head down. Any of those, to me, say, balance is nowhere near. So synergy is about bringing all those pieces back into that integration. So I'll give you a live example. So I've managed quite a number of fundraising and communication teams over the years. One of the things that I do, and it was a definitely a risky thing as a manager because I didn't really always go with organizational practice, but I didn't care.

Okay.

So I like to put. And I do it now at my company personal holidays. And for me, some people, a personal holiday is their birthday. Some people a personal holiday is their family reunion. Others is their anniversary. Some people have parents who pass. They have to be out for at least a week because they can't get their minds right. Okay, let us be realistic about the human side of people. We put all that on the calendar. Then we come back and we put all of the federal holidays that we still are able to acknowledge, evidently on the calendar. And then we start to lay on top of it, the events, the activities, the campaigns, the rollouts. And then we start to look at it and go, oh, hell, when nobody going to be in the office on this day and this day, how specific is it for us to do this thing right? So we're able to start to see where our time and actual energy. And I want every manager who thinks they do not have control of their schedule and their life and organizational calendar. Yes, you do. You got to map it so you can see it. Because then what I get to do with my team, when we see, oh, hell, we have this big campaign we're rolling out, also three people are going to be out the office because of their, remember personal holidays, things that I think matter to really keep you. That's a retention tool to me. Then we get to make some decisions. Do we have to roll it out that week or can we do it the week before? Who's going to do coverage? So months out, we're able to name. We're going to work like a whole fool for these three to six week periods. We all know it because we can see it. And then we have staggered time off so that integration is recognizing that I have three team members who have small children. And so back to schools August to September. Let me tell you what we're not doing during those six weeks launching a damn thing. Because for why. That's the time that we do gsd. That's our get ish done time period where we do operations back of the house, make sure our documents are together, make sure operational plans work. All of these things I've done in house in nonprofit organizations. I promise you small and big, because I work for medium size and large organizations. And I promise you, friends, it works. And it works when you make the decision to not burn your people to get to the outcome. And for me, that's where that synergy and integration starts to show up. Because your team members will fall over themselves to get stuff done when they believe and they experience that you see them and that you hear them and that you are willing to model what it is like to take care of yourself. That, to me, is the new charge. Okay? That, to me, is how the integration and synergy shows up. Okay, Fair. I got off. Let me get off my soapbox.

That's good. No, I love it. Listen, we're gonna end on that. So, you know, if you're out there, do yourself a favor. Read or even listen to Kashana's book. She narrates it herself if you want. If you're a fan of the audiobook, you can also follow Kishana on all the major social channels, listen to her podcasts, and access some amazing resources on her website, kashanapalmer.com we'll link to that and lots of other things in the [e-mail] insights. Kishana, thank you so much for being here. Before we go, any other words of advice you'd like to share with our listeners?

Listen, friends, you have everything you need to be successful right now. You hear me? Everything you need. And if you start to feel a little rumble in your belly at the point of going to another event, you know you don't want to go. Just decline and get in your bed with some good snacks and relax. Trust me, it's a muscle that you get to work. It's atrophied. But I want you to work it, and I want you to let me know how you did it.

Listen, as. As Gen Xters, I feel like we have to quote Nancy Reagan, just say no. Just don't go to that event. We perhaps mean it a little differently than she.

Absolutely. Okay.

All right, everyone, have yourself a great day.

[Farrah Trim Peter]

Are you a fan of this podcast or Big Duck's other resources on nonprofit communications? If you are, we'd love to hear from you. Please drop us a line by writing to helloigduck.com to tell us what you're working on and what topics you need help with. We also welcome getting your feedback via reviews. You can review this podcast in itunes or wherever you listen. We'd love to hear from you.

[Kashana Palmer]

This is the Smart Communications Podcast Developing the Voices of Determined Nonprofits brought to.

[Farrah Trim Peter]

You by Big Duck. Big Duck is an agency that puts smart communications in the hands of nonprofits. We help our nonprofit clients develop strong brands, strong campaigns, and strong teams that advance their missions and achieve their goals.

[Kashana Palmer]

Connect with [e-mail].