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- [00:01]
Host
The following podcast is a Dear Media Production. The kind of, like, dehumanizing thing that happens when people see people on the.
- [00:10]
Chase Huddie
Tv, on the phone having an honest conversation with somebody. You are 10 times more likely to remember that because everyone out there just wants connection. I feel like that people are yearning for community right now. Me especially, I like to connect with people. So when people try to, like, write me off as not a real person, it's, like, felt very alone within my feelings. Growing up, I just expected the world to give you the same kindness that you give others. That's what you've been taught, like, growing up. And so I wasn't ready for what, like, the world had for me. Even, like, after having a mental breakdown, it's like, yeah. And that was something that I hid from everybody else because I didn't want everyone to know that I'm actually weak, you know, or fragile.
- [00:52]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [00:52]
Chase Huddie
My new song, fragile. I'm kind of talking about bringing it back to who I am, which is a fragile person and a human being, and just reminding people that I'm human and I'm just like you. And we all kind of go through the same things.
- [01:20]
Host
Chase.
- [01:21]
Co-host/Interviewer
Welcome to the Squeeze.
- [01:22]
Chase Huddie
Thank you guys for having me.
- [01:24]
Host
Chase Huddie. You'll probably, like, interchange them between the two. Um, but I'm so excited to sit down and chat.
- [01:30]
Co-host/Interviewer
Um, I feel like I've obviously seen.
- [01:32]
Host
You on the Internet for quite some time, but I feel like you. I feel like over the past, like, year or so, you've really, like, transformed your social media. I feel like you are talking about your mental health, and you're, like, really, like, being open and honest, which I.
- [01:46]
Co-host/Interviewer
Think is, like, super awesome.
- [01:47]
Host
So I'm excited to kind of dive into it today.
- [01:50]
Chase Huddie
Oh, my gosh, dude, me too. I think this whole process of. Of where I've been trying to find myself on. On this journey of life, but also with music, is. Is how can I tell my story and how can I be more open with people and find a way to connect with everybody through it? And so now that I'm able to release some music that's kind of about it. Yeah, I'm able to talk about it so much more openly. I love it.
- [02:15]
Co-host/Interviewer
I love it.
- [02:15]
Host
I'm excited for you. Okay, so we start each episode off with this jar. It's a game called Citrus Got Real. If you want to pull a little question. I know, it's funny. If you want to pull a little P of paper out of there and lead us the question, whichever one you are Feeling. Hopefully it's not like a makeup question.
- [02:32]
Chase Huddie
I feel like going for the one on the top's not. Not the vibe. Maybe I'll go with this one also on the top, but who cares? If you had a boat, what would you name it? Persephone.
- [02:45]
Host
It's like you had that prepared.
- [02:47]
Chase Huddie
Yeah, yeah.
- [02:49]
Host
Why that name?
- [02:52]
Chase Huddie
She's the goddess of the. The sirens and singing, and so she would be the mermaid that I would be looking for in the ocean.
- [02:58]
Co-host/Interviewer
Oh, wow. Okay.
- [03:00]
Host
That's a good. Really had that. Okay. So obviously we talked about how you're really just starting to open up through your music and your platform, and we're going to talk about that. But I love just, like, getting to know our guests a little bit more and kind of who, like, little Chase was growing up. What was growing up like for you?
- [03:18]
Chase Huddie
Growing up for me was really interesting because I had a mix of, like, the people that, like, loved me and were also really jealous and hateful towards, like, me even growing up. Like, I started social media when I was in middle school, and so from, like, the beginning of middle school, I kind of faced people being assholes to me. And I was always just like, I was like, 5, 2 when I was young. It took me until I was 15 before I even, like, hit a Grossberg or, like, dropped my voice. So I was. I was dealing with stuff and being as short as possibly can be and, like, as tiny, and I was just like this bundle of joy that was so naive and everyone was twisted, like, from an early age. And so I think, like, growing up, I just expected the world to give you the same kindness that you give others, because that's what you've been taught, like, growing up.
- [04:12]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [04:13]
Chase Huddie
And. And so I wasn't ready for what, like, the world had for me. And, like, it tore me down, but also built me back up because it prepared me for what I could expect from la. So even when I had things like that happen to me when I'm out here, I expected it a little bit more and I knew what to do with it.
- [04:35]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [04:36]
Chase Huddie
But I think, like, growing up was cool for me because I was super heavily involved also in sports, and. And I always wanted to do something creative. And when I realized sports wasn't for me, that's when I really started to lean into, like, the arts. But it was something that was almost, like, shunned upon. And in my hometown, it wasn't like, the cool thing to be a theater kid or to be in music class. Right.
- [05:02]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah. But nowadays, yeah, I love it.
- [05:04]
Host
I know. I love that. We're, like, finally starting to have that shift.
- [05:08]
Chase Huddie
Mm.
- [05:09]
Host
It's really awesome. Do you feel like you struggled with.
- [05:11]
Co-host/Interviewer
Your mental health as a kid?
- [05:12]
Host
Like, being bullied and whatnot?
- [05:14]
Chase Huddie
For sure, yeah. I got bullied from, like, sixth grade all the way up until sophomore year. I actually moved to online school as a sophomore so I could finish there.
- [05:22]
Co-host/Interviewer
Because of bowling.
- [05:23]
Chase Huddie
Yeah. It just got really harsh for me in high school, and it was a combination of starting to get a little bit of fame and a little bit of money and, like, where I come from, I come from Stockton, which is, like, the second or maybe first, like, most dangerous city in California.
- [05:39]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [05:39]
Chase Huddie
And so not only were people asking me, like, every day for shoutouts, but then following it up for an insult, and then I had people, like, chasing me to class to try and steal my shoes. Like, things like that. People haven't experienced someone ever, like, even making the slightest bit of money. So if you were like, 200 pair of shoes, like, they would. They would try to steal that shit from you. Yeah, it was really weird, like, kind of facing those kinds of problems because it isolated me, and I just kind of stuck with my friend group and was just like, I'm good with this.
- [06:12]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [06:13]
Chase Huddie
And so I just kind of hid in the shadows in high school, and it made me, like, really sad. So what I would do is I would go and I would just put my head down and just listen to music in class and just like, try to resolve my feelings with music.
- [06:27]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [06:27]
Chase Huddie
But it actually made it worse for me because I was into, like, really sad stuff at the time. And so ultimately my parents were like, well, you're failing just about everything. We should probably take you out. And I found that I liked school a lot better when I was actually getting taught one on one. And with all the distractions, like, growing up, I had. I had, like, super heavy adhd. And so it was hard for me to focus in school in general. So when I switched online, I started acing my courses because I could actually focus on what they were trying to teach.
- [06:58]
Host
Oh, wow, that's awesome.
- [07:00]
Chase Huddie
Right?
- [07:00]
Host
Well, cool that your parents, like, did that too. And for you to, like, realize that, because I have friends that kind of similarly like, struggled in school. But if you have adhd, it's the way school is structured. I mean, there is a lot of changes that are happening in schools now, but, like, when we were growing up, the way it is, like, if you have ADHD or some type of, like, learning attention impairment, it can be really hard and it's not that, you know, you're struggling with the material. It's actually just like, hey, like, my, like my brain can't focus right now.
- [07:36]
Chase Huddie
Yeah. I could not focus on a test. I was usually like, the last one to finish.
- [07:40]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [07:41]
Chase Huddie
But it was just impossible for me to. To focus when I was a kid. And also, switching online school was like, a big thing that I was talking about for, like, the entirety of me being in high school. My parents didn't really want to because they're. They're teachers. And so because they're teachers, they're like, no, you need do it the right way.
- [07:57]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [07:58]
Chase Huddie
But they realized the stuff that I was going through and, and ultimately, like, made a decision that they knew would have been good for me.
- [08:06]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [08:06]
Host
You said you were in middle school when, like, online started taking off.
- [08:09]
Chase Huddie
Yeah, when I started doing social media. So, like, I, I really hadn't, like, gotten like, too many followers and tick tock really wasn't a big thing back then. It was actually, like, considered cringe to absolutely everyone.
- [08:22]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [08:23]
Chase Huddie
And so if they knew that I was doing it, they would just give me for it all the time. I would say, like, freshman year is when things started to go, like, really well, but I started taking it seriously, like probably eighth grade. And. And so, yeah, I had to deal with all of that. Especially, like, in middle school, everyone cares more about popularity. I think by high school, it starts to fade. Like freshman year, you kind, you, like, care the most, and then you start to care a little bit less throughout the years.
- [08:52]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [08:53]
Chase Huddie
Yeah. Everyone ends up with, like, three friends by the end of senior year. You know what I mean?
- [08:57]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah. Yeah.
- [08:58]
Host
I look back on high school and I feel the same way. Like, I feel like I knew in high school I had, like, a lot of friends in the sense of, like, I just knew everyone. Like, I was involved in so many different things, so I just, like, knew a bunch of people, but I really only hung out with, like, three people. Like, I really only had, like, a couple, like, close friends.
- [09:16]
Chase Huddie
Yeah.
- [09:16]
Host
And I think that's. I think that's awesome. Like, when you start to learn that you don't need to be everyone's friend, that you, like, just have your, like, little circle.
- [09:25]
Chase Huddie
Yeah. It's important to have that as well and to, like, know who actually, like, cares and will put in the time to you. Because, like, growing up, I thought being popular was, was cool. And then it came to high school and I was like, oh, it actually just means nothing.
- [09:40]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [09:40]
Chase Huddie
And. And especially once you get out of high school too. You're like, it's. It's the most freeing thing ever because you realize none of it matters. And you could have been, like, doing the things that you thought were cool, but you were too afraid to do in high school.
- [09:50]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [09:51]
Chase Huddie
As an adult. And so, like, that's this. That's been me. My entire adulthood has been me, like, trying all the things that I didn't try when I was a kid because I was afraid.
- [10:00]
Host
Looking back, like, when social media started taking off, obviously a big thing that's.
- [10:05]
Co-host/Interviewer
Talked about now is.
- [10:08]
Host
Kids having social media at such a young age. And with someone like you that is in like, the less than 1% that it actually, like, takes off for the mental health that comes with that because, you know, even. Even grown adults deal with it. But when you are a kid and you're filtering all of these comments and all like this attention and this video did better than this, and these people are saying this and false things are being said, or someone has an assumption about you that isn't true, how was that, like, filtering comments and hateful things for you?
- [10:43]
Chase Huddie
Well, at first it really messed with me that people were saying things about me. And I mean, I got it all. I heard it all. I had people try to come at me from every angle they possibly could. And I mean, most of the things people have said about me are. Aren't true. There's just, you know, there's a million and one rumors that everyone likes to create. But also, like, the, the, the hatefulness in comment sections really, like, kind of sucks because, you know, you're trying to put on your best.
- [11:15]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [11:16]
Chase Huddie
Self for the Internet and to, like, get taken back or kind of just derailed by the people that are like, oh, wow, your body looks this type of way, or you look this type of way, or your hair is ugly. You know, the smallest things and you're like, wait, really? Because you kind of second guess it. But you really. You have to try to tune those things out in order to keep a level head. And that's like, a really hard thing to do for most people.
- [11:42]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [11:42]
Host
Do you feel like you have a healthy relationship with it now, or was there a point where you kind of had, like, a breaking point? You needed to set a boundary with it?
- [11:50]
Chase Huddie
I think the breaking point for me was trying to separate myself from giving too much of myself online. And that was really tough for me because I've always been an emotional person. But when I started doing music, I was like, there's no point to, like, waste My time trying to, like, give the world, like, chase the person when I can kind of hide behind Huddie the Persona.
- [12:17]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [12:17]
Chase Huddie
And. And so with doing that, I. I ended up just. Just kind of talking about my feelings through music. But I think from going through so much judgment online about my feelings, like, it. That was my breaking point was people going out of their way to make fun of me. Like, just trying to express my feelings and then finding music as that, like, therapeutic outlet for me kind of solved all those problems.
- [12:43]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [12:44]
Chase Huddie
But now I feel like I can open up to people through the music, and that's become, like, a way for me to express myself again.
- [12:52]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [12:53]
Host
I like what you said about, like, Chase the human and then, like, Huddy the Persona.
- [12:59]
Co-host/Interviewer
Why?
- [13:00]
Host
What is, like, the biggest difference between those two people for you?
- [13:05]
Chase Huddie
Well, I mean, I. Part of me likes to have fun and do all these things. Like, I would say there's. There's a word called omniver, which is an introverted extrovert. Like, I can be super introverted, but I also want to be super extroverted. And I think that those two things are. Are very separate and in the way that I like to keep my peace, but I also like to get rowdy. And so I think that those different sides, my personality kind of fall into place. With Huddy and Chase.
- [13:40]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yes.
- [13:42]
Chase Huddie
I can be like this, but then I can go, like, perform a show and not sit still and. And just jump around and crowd surf or do something stupid.
- [13:52]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [13:52]
Chase Huddie
That's me at my, like, wildest moment. But I really like to, you know, have, like, a very calm, chill life. Like, I. Yeah. You know, I spend most of my time with my dog.
- [14:05]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [14:06]
Chase Huddie
You know what I mean?
- [14:06]
Host
The best I know, that reminds me of Tate McCray. Her, like, stage name she has for herself is Tatiana. Like, when she's performing, she's like, that's Tatiana. And, like, her behind closed doors is Tate.
- [14:18]
Chase Huddie
My drunk Persona has been Huddie the Hurricane.
- [14:23]
Host
Huddy the Hurricane. Oh, my gosh.
- [14:25]
Chase Huddie
Hurricane Huddy. Either one. But, like, isn't that crazy? Like, we. We all kind of have our own Persona.
- [14:30]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [14:31]
Chase Huddie
Think about it.
- [14:31]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [14:32]
Host
We all need a little alter. I mean, especially if you're, like, performing, I feel like it is almost helpful. It's like acting. You're, like, switching into a character in. In a sense, like, it's still you, but, like, you're performing and you're having to put on a show, like, obviously it's not you.
- [14:48]
Chase Huddie
Yeah. I mean, you're trying to convey the emotions behind the song. You're not telling them your whole life story.
- [14:53]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [14:54]
Chase Huddie
You know, so you're putting in that muscle memory of what that song meant to you into this song. In the same way they're like, okay, right now, like, say you're acting like right now you need to go to the darkest, worst breakup you've ever had and insert that emotion into like this scene right now. You know, that's the same thing that you kind of have to go through with music as well.
- [15:16]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [15:17]
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- [20:17]
Host
Just saw this on social media, but did you just, like, film something or. Okay, can you tell me about that or.
- [20:24]
Chase Huddie
I just did my first feature film, how to Lose a Popularity Contest with Sarah Waist Class. We were shooting in. In Vancouver. I heard that's where a lot of films go down.
- [20:36]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [20:36]
Chase Huddie
But, yeah, we shot a really unique and cool rom com that I feel like it's one of those 2000s hits mixed with, like, a little bit of, like, today's edge. It's just so cool. It's really well written and I feel like I was playing a part of myself. Like, when I read the role initially, I was like, sounds so similar to who I am as a person and like, my trajectory into, like, what I do today.
- [21:09]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [21:10]
Chase Huddie
Like, so I. I really enjoyed doing that. It was so. Just unique and. And strange for me to do that because it was. It was like, what am I. What am I doing with my life? Like, it's so. It was so crazy because I, yeah. Had only done other. One other thing in acting, and it took us five days to film that, but it took us like a month to do this. And so, I mean, it took some training. Like, you have to work out a bunch and you have to train the coach and all these things. I was like, wow. Like, this is.
- [21:43]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [21:43]
Chase Huddie
Next level.
- [21:44]
Host
Were you, like, wanting to do that again or how did the. How did it come to be?
- [21:50]
Chase Huddie
Well, I expressed to my agents at caa, like, when I signed with them, I was like, one of the things that I really want to dive into is acting. And I. It's like another one of those things where I'm just like, I. I don't really know how to. How to get into this or where I could start. And so they just started me with doing like, a bunch of auditions, and I feel like I, you know, I got stronger through doing those auditions and, like, I prepared myself for this moment. And when it finally happened, I was just really, like, relieved. I was like, wow. Like, I feel like I've been putting all this work and it finally got to pay off.
- [22:28]
Host
Yeah, that's so exciting. I feel like Sarah, I mean, I don't know her if I want to know her. Sarah, we'd love to have you on this podcast. Just a side note, but she. She just seems like the Best person to, like, be in a new environment. Like, oh, my God. Something that, you know, it's a new environment to you having someone to kind of like, act opposite of and just make you feel comfortable. She seems like she would be that person.
- [22:51]
Chase Huddie
Oh, my gosh. Yes. She's so funny. And she's got some of the, like, the greatest stories, like, I've ever heard. And I mean, she's just so sweet. And she's also really goddamn talented at what she does and, like, getting to see her and her watch me throughout this whole process, she was really just happy because we all got to become friends throughout the whole process of this.
- [23:22]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [23:23]
Chase Huddie
And still we're keeping in touch with, like, taking vacations together. Like, they went and saw my show in Seattle. Like, she flew out from Toronto to come and see it, which is like a five hour flight. Like, the, like, the dedication that all of us have taken now to take initiative of, like, keeping connected and staying friends. Like, I feel like I'm gonna be friends with these people for years now because of just what a beautiful environment that we kind of created with, with this movie. And it was so much fun to work beside her. She was just a stellar actress.
- [24:00]
Host
I love that. That's so exciting. I'm excited for you.
- [24:02]
Chase Huddie
Thank you.
- [24:03]
Host
I do want to touch on this because you've. You've kind of talked about, like, meeting fans and talking with fans and like, making comments like, I can't believe you're a real person. And the kind of like, dehumanizing thing that happens when people see people on the tv, on the phone, just like they see these people and they see them in real life, and it is just dehumanizes you in a way. What's been your experience with that?
- [24:33]
Chase Huddie
It's been really odd because I'll always see myself as like a very normal person. But a lot of the people in the public eye kind of see me as, you know, this, I don't know, like, personified kind of crazy person. I don't even know how the public really perceives me because it's like, you just live who you are, you know?
- [24:56]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [24:57]
Chase Huddie
But seeing that happen in real life, like, people coming up to me and telling me like, oh, my God, I can't believe you're real. Like, half the people I meet will just come up to me like, dude, two nights ago at Barney, some girl came up to me and threw a phone in my face. Was like, yeah. And then she just posted online and I'm like, dude, this is crazy. This is the kind of thing, there's. There's the person that will come out of their way to have a normal interaction with you, to actually try to figure you out a little bit. And then there's the person that will come up to you and just blurt five words and walk away. Not say thank you, like not even like, acknowledge your existence that you are a real person.
- [25:34]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [25:35]
Chase Huddie
And I think every day, if you were to go into a scenario where you're having an honest conversation with somebody, you are 10 times more likely to remember that because it's like, yes, that's what this is about. I want to connect to these people. I want them to ask me a question they've actually like, wanted to ask somebody like me or me specifically. I would rather them have that than something where, you know, it just seems very fabricated and. Or like fake.
- [26:07]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [26:09]
Chase Huddie
You know, because everyone out there just wants connection. I feel like that people are yearning for community right now. And me especially, I like to connect with people. So when people try to like write me off as not a real person, it's like, even my new song, Fragile, I'm kind of talking about the idea that, like, bringing it back to who I am, which is a fragile person and a human being and just reminding people that I'm human and I'm just like you. And we all kind of go through the same things.
- [26:41]
Host
Okay, let's get into music.
- [26:43]
Chase Huddie
Let's talk.
- [26:44]
Host
You kind of touched on music and music just being a part of your life. Growing up, had you always, like, kind of wanted to explore or when did you decide to, like, actually, like, take it seriously and pursue it?
- [27:00]
Chase Huddie
The thing is, I always wanted to and I just didn't have the tools or the resources to do it. Like, where I grew up just didn't have an alternative music scene. I always wanted to make alternative music. And so when I made it out to la, it was the first thing that I told my manager because we were having the meeting because she wanted to be my manager. So we were talking and she's like, what's your five year plan? I told her. I was like, so I like doing social media, it's cool. But in the long run, I really wanted to be a musician. So if there's any way I could meet people in the space and kind of fill it out, that would be great. Because it was all foreign to me. So I'd never even seen what a studio looked like or how to write a song. But when I was a little kid, I always found an interest to writing Songs?
- [27:45]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [27:45]
Chase Huddie
I just never knew how to do it, you know? And I never played guitar. So once I had, like, the tools and the resources, I. I started writing music with a label just. Just because they wanted to see what could happen.
- [27:59]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [27:59]
Chase Huddie
And then they fell in love with it and signed a record deal with me, which is really cool. But, yeah, like, it wasn't something. When I was a little kid, I was too shy to be a performer. I tried out for one talent show, and I didn't even get an email back. You'll be hearing from us.
- [28:16]
Co-host/Interviewer
Lol.
- [28:16]
Chase Huddie
You'll be. Yeah, totally, like, bombed it for sure. I sang In a World like this by the Backstreet Boys. It was, like, their comeback single, and I was obsessed with it. That's so good.
- [28:27]
Host
It's funny. How are you on stage now?
- [28:29]
Chase Huddie
I'm. I'm so comfortable. I really started to get into it. The thing that's the hardest part about performing is finding what to talk about in between songs. Like, I could perform all day, just get to the music part, but in between, I'm like, you guys are people. Hello.
- [28:46]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [28:47]
Chase Huddie
What do I say? And then I'm just like, new Jersey, you know? And they're like, yeah.
- [28:53]
Host
A lot of the times, you know, songwriters will talk about how writing songs is really therapeutic for them, and it is, like, such a release. How has that creative process been for you?
- [29:05]
Chase Huddie
Music sessions are therapy sessions. So you walk in there, they're like, what's been going on in your life? I'm like, oh, dude, I just went to Paris. No, no, no, no. Yeah, tell me the dark shit right now. I need to hear the actual things that we go on your life. I'm like, well, there has been this one thing that happened recently, and that'll start the conversation of, like, really what you want to talk about within a song. And I mean, most music, if we look at it just on a broad scale, probably like, 90% of it's sad.
- [29:39]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [29:40]
Chase Huddie
And especially nowadays.
- [29:42]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [29:42]
Chase Huddie
But also with alternative music like you, the best music you can make is. Is heartbreak music.
- [29:49]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [29:50]
Chase Huddie
Yeah. Like, I remember my friend Matson told me, he's like, the being in love sucks because you can't write any great songs about it.
- [29:58]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [29:58]
Chase Huddie
It's like, the hardest music to write is song about being in love.
- [30:02]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [30:03]
Chase Huddie
But it's been a huge release for me to talk about the things that have gone on in my life. I made this album all about telling the story of who I am and what I've gone through. Because my last album I debut was just about the relationships in my life and how it's all a process that I can kind of see coming because I've been through the highs and the lows, and this is how it goes. And, like, that's the whole, you know, album. But with this one, it's like, this is who I am as a person. The things that I've, like, really gone through outside of relationships and. Yeah. And, like, how it's formed me as a person today.
- [30:41]
Host
Is that, like, in the beginning, was that exciting for you? Was that scary for you, being vulnerable? Like, what made you actually be, like, I'm comfortable to do this?
- [30:51]
Chase Huddie
No, I think the more vulnerable you can get, the. The better the material that you can get. And I realized that after I. I wrote my biggest song called all the Things I hate about you. And when I wrote that song, I was like, oh, so there's literally no limit to what you can write about in music. And it just kind of opened up this door of, like, if I'm being more, like, whether it's relatable or whether it's, like, honest with people, that that is the thing that people are going to relate to the most and find something that they can relate to you on is when you are telling them something that you've gone through that people can either interpret or have gone through very similar situations.
- [31:35]
Host
Yeah, that's been, like. My biggest thing with this podcast is the amount of people that have come up to me. It's actually really funny because Taylor mainly gets people coming up to him talking about the podcast now and, like, more than movies and stuff. And I think it just shows, like, you know, obviously he's a great actor, and I'm obsessed with everything he's done, but, like, it just shows that relatability. Like, it's a character he's playing.
- [32:02]
Co-host/Interviewer
But when him and I sit down.
- [32:03]
Host
And, you know, we're talking about what's going on in our marriage, it gives people kind of, like, something to relate to in a sense of, like, not just a character, but actually, like, what someone is going through. And I think that's, like, been a big focus over the past couple years with, like, how a lot of people, you know, show their art or how they do their work, whatever it is.
- [32:26]
Co-host/Interviewer
And what you said at the beginning, like, we're all really needing community.
- [32:30]
Host
That is, like, the biggest thing I preach, because that I think going through Covid and everyone being so isolated, it actually made us realize how important, like, having connections and relationships with people are and being able to relate two people.
- [32:44]
Chase Huddie
Yeah, absolutely. Like, Covid really brought everyone together and I viewed it as a time where everyone got to focus in on something that they want to be their next life endeavor. Like they had enough time to think about what is the pivot for me in these next five years. For me, it was music and it gave me the perfect outlet to find the time to make music. And I mean it's, it's really cool that like you guys have gone out of your way and, and really put together this podcast and also made it about mental health, which is something I think more podcasts should be talking about because I think some, some of the stuff that you see nowadays just, it's. It feels like a lot of comedians and not a lot of realness.
- [33:31]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [33:32]
Chase Huddie
Going on right now. And, and so I think people should be talking about their feelings like as often as they can, you know?
- [33:39]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [33:39]
Chase Huddie
It helps people through some dark times.
- [33:42]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [33:43]
Host
And it's crazy because like for me opening up about my feelings, I feel so much less scared. Like, I would rather talk about my secrets than like film the inside of my house. Like, like it's this weird like catch 22 type thing. Like, that feels like showing the inside of my home feels more private than like me actually sharing like what's going on in my brain, which I don't know if most people feel that, but I feel like with this career path that I've chosen, it helps because I'm just like, I'm going to talk about it also. I think just because so many people have, like, when people come up to me and they're like, this podcast saved my life, I'm like, great. I actually need to keep like talking and keep like sharing things and being vulnerable because that somehow is helpful. So I'm just. My goal is to keep chatting and hopefully it keeps doing well.
- [34:33]
Chase Huddie
Oh, absolutely. You guys are gonna crush.
- [34:34]
Co-host/Interviewer
Thank you.
- [34:35]
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- [37:57]
Host
Okay, let's dive into your new single, Fragile. You touched on it a little bit.
- [38:01]
Co-host/Interviewer
But I'd love for our Lemon drops.
- [38:03]
Host
That'S our listeners, that's their name, to hear a little bit more about where the idea of the song came from because you kind of touched on it. It is like, very honest and vulnerable.
- [38:15]
Chase Huddie
Well, the day that I wrote Fragile, it was like raining outside and I was going through a really tough time feeling like I couldn't open up to people about my feelings. I felt very alone within my feelings and I felt like I couldn't tell my friends, like, the things that I was going through. It felt like it was getting to a tougher point to talk to my parents about it. And I was even kind of avoiding, like telling my therapist certain things. And same with the relationship that I was in prior. I just came to a point where I wouldn't even tell her the kind of darkness going on inside my head because I viewed being vulnerable as like weakness in that time. And that's just completely not true. And I think going through the process of writing this song was just, you know, bringing that idea back to life that we are all emotional beings at the end of the day, whether we like to be or not, whether it's some guy out there that thinks he's an alpha male, like, you know, like the end of the day, like, they'll let anger and frustration kind of take over their brain instead of sadness and hopelessness and despair, you know, because people try to find fixes all the time, but really, like, finding like peace within, like your own tension in your life is what, you know, helps you get through those things you have. You can't just work your way around it. And I think you definitely can't bottle it up either.
- [39:56]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [39:57]
Chase Huddie
So like, the point of the song was really to just kind of talk about how I would keep it all in and how that was just slowly beating me up and making me feel like, deteriorated, just pulling me down. So for a while, like, that was kind of the dilemma that I was going through. And writing the song kind of helped me through that dilemma because I wasn't able to find an understanding for it until I wrote it. And it's now it's just a constant reminder to me and to everyone else that it's okay to feel and go through things. And the. The other thing is, is like, right, like you. You have to put on a happy face even though you are staying busy. Like, I. I had a really bad Mental Breakdown in Nashville, I was on tour. I had a week left of tour, but it felt like that week for me was super shitty because I played some shows that I felt like weren't my best, and. And sometimes in, like, the middle of America, like, the crowds, like, they don't go as. As hard as some of the places on the east coast or the west coast, and I just didn't feel the love, like, for a few nights straight. And. And that's not even to say that they didn't love the performance or whatever. It's just the idea that I'm this, like, perfectionist that wants to make sure everything goes smooth or according to plan and not feeling like I was getting there. And so I got off stage, and I was kind of bummed about it, but then I watched my friends go out and also play, and they kicked ass, and everyone loved them, and I was like, why do I feel like they didn't like me?
- [41:36]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [41:36]
Chase Huddie
And so I started having this, like, deep conversation with the. The band I was touring with. Beauty School Dropout, The. The guitarist's dad, he was talking to me about how you have to keep putting on these shows because this is what makes everything worth it. Once you've really sold out, like, a huge, huge room, and you start to really get there for yourself, like, that's when things will start to make sense, because you got to go through, like, the tough shows to have the amazing shows, like, down the line. And so also, dealing with that while you have zero privacy on tour was really tough because then I ran out of there like a little girl, and I was crying in front of 50 people. Also, I had no friends in Nashville, and we were touring with a bunch of people that just have so many friends in Nashville. I was like, no one. Like, I don't know anyone in any of these cities I'm touring in.
- [42:33]
Co-host/Interviewer
Like, yeah.
- [42:34]
Chase Huddie
So I was beating myself up about all of those things all at once. And then I had things going on with work, and. And you can't hide from that. And if you have no one to talk to about it, then it just kind of just drives you a little crazy. I feel like the only person I could talk to about it was my parents, which was very helpful, honestly. But even, like, after having a mental breakdown, it's like, yeah, then that was something that I hid from everybody else because I didn't want everyone to know that I'm actually weak, you know, Or.
- [43:03]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [43:03]
Chase Huddie
Fragile.
- [43:04]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [43:05]
Host
Very. Punny. Very. What's the biggest thing you hope people take away from the song.
- [43:11]
Chase Huddie
I hope people can just look at the song. Whether it's a song that makes them feel or feel seen, you know, I want people to look at any of the songs that I'm releasing and not just say, oh, that was a good song, but kind of be able to take something away from it. Because I try to, like, write these songs as, like, baby stories.
- [43:34]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [43:35]
Chase Huddie
And almost like a scene in the movie where you. I guess with Fragile is like one of those, like, breakup scenes, you know?
- [43:44]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [43:44]
Chase Huddie
The sad turning point where they're. You know, this summer I turn pretty. Like, when they have that started on that one. A recent episode where.
- [43:53]
Host
Don't get me started on that.
- [43:56]
Chase Huddie
Where Conrad was on the beach confessing his love and she just breaks his heart.
- [43:59]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yep.
- [44:00]
Chase Huddie
That's. That's what Fragile is meant to be. Cinema.
- [44:04]
Host
I've just filmed an episode with my girlfriends, and we literally talked about Summer interpreted the entire time. I completely understand and can see that song playing in that moment completely. We talked about earlier, kind of, like this Chase Huddie thing.
- [44:23]
Chase Huddie
Right.
- [44:24]
Host
What has it been like for you to learn, like, who your authentic self is and just really being, like, where you're at in life?
- [44:35]
Chase Huddie
I think the authentic side comes from doing what's natural to you. Like, I think if you're trying to be somebody else, it's harder for you. If you don't dress like yourself, you don't feel like yourself, if you don't look back at a conversation and say, oh, I said everything in that conversation that I would normally say to another stranger, then you're not being authentic to yourself.
- [44:57]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [44:59]
Chase Huddie
I especially see that within music. I will never release something that I feel like my heart's not fully in.
- [45:06]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [45:07]
Chase Huddie
And I think authenticity just comes from doing what you want to do with your life and not because you want validation or somebody to say, you look cool. You know, like, you will attract the people that you need or want in your life by being who you are, you know, I learned that in high school because I went from feeling like I was trying to fit in to starting to wear shirts with Justin Bieber's face on it in sophomore year. And then that was, like, that turning point where I was like, I don't really care. They're like, oh, that's so lame, dude. You're wearing Justin Bieber. I'm just like, hell, yeah. And I love it. You know, and that attracted, like, my friends that were also into Chesapeake Fever at the time. They were like, it's so sick. I'm Gonna get that shirt, too.
- [45:54]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [45:54]
Chase Huddie
Yeah. And they did.
- [45:56]
Host
That's something that I'm really thankful for. For some reason, I was just always very content with myself, like, who I was. I think that's also because I'm an only child, and my mom, like, just, like, hyped me up all the time. So. What was that like, being an only child?
- [46:12]
Chase Huddie
Yeah.
- [46:14]
Host
I don't know.
- [46:16]
Chase Huddie
Is it very quiet when your parents, like, all the time?
- [46:19]
Host
I mean, I guess it. It was quiet at some points, but more so, like, because I'm the only. Even, like, my cousins. I'm the only one that's like, my age, so. My cousins, yeah, they're like, 10 years older or 10 years younger, so I think it made me mature fast, which I think is also why high school, like, wasn't, like, in the sense of knowing who I was wasn't as hard because I kind of already, like, had it figured out in a degree. But I. I mean, I was also, like, at daycare all the time because both my parents worked. And then I. In high school and junior high, I danced, so I was always at dance.
- [46:52]
Chase Huddie
Oh, that's sweet. My grandpa was a. Or my grandma was a daycare girl, and my. My other grandpa, he was, like, an art teacher. So, like, they. They like the little dynamic. But I always had, like, cousins in my same age bracket, so it's. It was. It was nice for me. I feel like you'd have to, like. I don't know. It's. It's so weird to grow up around people that are so much older than you. I feel like.
- [47:18]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [47:19]
Chase Huddie
Well, one I realized, though, like, when I became an adult, I was like, I like people that are 10 years older than me because they have, like, advice that I can really take, and I actually want to, like, listen to them. Like, the people my age, we have the stupidest conversations ever. But, you know. You know, it's what being young is about. But I think, like, I owe a lot of my childhood to my two sisters. The second I walked into middle school, she's like, you're not walking in like that, and your hair's definitely not gonna look like that. And I was like, okay, what should it look like? And so my sister did my hair on the first day of middle school, and I stuck to this dress code that she got me, which was flannels, blue jeans, and Converse. And that was my uniform for a long time. And then my oldest sister, I credit my music taste to her, and actually, a little bit my other older sister as well, because she put me onto One Direction, which was life changing for me, because then I could wrap my head around. It was the first time I could wrap my head around what being famous was. And it really was like, I watched the One Direction movie because my sister dragged me and her best friend's other brother. And so we all, the four of us went and watched the movie and I. It just changed my perspective on music as a whole because the only country, like, concerts that I ever been to, because my parents would drag me to country concerts when I was younger. And. And so I was like, this is cool, but people just want to, like, dance. They don't really care. They're just here to drink beer and have fun.
- [48:55]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [48:55]
Chase Huddie
You know, but that's. That's not what any of the other genres are. Like. Like, especially their concerts.
- [49:00]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [49:00]
Chase Huddie
You know.
- [49:01]
Co-host/Interviewer
How many sisters do you have?
- [49:02]
Host
Two, and they're both older. Are you so close with them?
- [49:05]
Chase Huddie
Yeah, yeah, super close. My. My other sister, she came to one of my shows. She lives in D.C. with her boyfriend now. And my oldest sister, she's. She's married and she's got two of the cutest cats ever. But, yeah, no, I'm very close with. With all of them. And I feel like if I were to call them right now, I'd be like, we. You know, we. Even if you haven't spoken in months, it would just pick up right where I left off.
- [49:29]
Host
Yeah, that's great. I want to talk about relationships for a moment because you kind of touched on it. Specifically breakups, but both romantic and friendships. Because friendship breakups, I actually feel, sometimes can even be harder than romantic breakups, especially if you've been friends with someone for so long, you've obviously been through both scenarios of it.
- [49:54]
Chase Huddie
Right.
- [49:54]
Host
What have you learned about healing and moving forward after the ending of a friendship or of a relationship?
- [50:02]
Chase Huddie
I think you have to study the five stages of grief and see how you can relate them to letting go of people in your life. Like, I would say that losing a friend is like a slow burn, and it happens slowly over time. Like, you kind of. You try to stay in touch, but you can feel the distance kind of happening, and you still try to hold on to what's there, but then you have to skip the three to five steps of grief and make it to acceptance. And once you're able to do that, you can find peace in it. Because if you can learn that the people in your life are meant to be in your life, and if they aren't going to put in the Effort, they might not be meant to be in your life.
- [50:44]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [50:45]
Chase Huddie
You know, even if you've been friends with them for six years, like, learning to let go of the idea of who you guys were in the beginning of that friendship, you know, whenever it was at its peak, I think it's the same thing that you kind of look at in the slow burn of a relationship fading away. You look at them how you first met them, but you also see the good, bad, and the ugly. When you look at a relationship, you have to look at it in the present time. You know, you can't look at it as, like, what it used to be, because what is it right now? Like, my friends aren't calling me. I have friends. I've been friends for, like, seven years. I consider, like, my closest friends. Don't call me, don't text me, don't nothing. And so I think when things get that stale, you have to recognize that and accept it. And with a relationship, I mean, you're always trying to hold on to the good that might be left in it. And for me, I'm a peacemaker, and I'm a fixer. Like, I want to make sure that the relationship still has its foundation, that it's. It's good, it feels fresh and fun, and that, you know, you guys are both equally having a great time. But I think you also have to look at it for what it is, because for me, I hold on to the idea of, like, what it was in the beginning, and I'm always trying to, like, get it back to, like, that square one point of, like, why we're in this in the first place. But I think the negativity can outweigh that positivity. And when things get really rough like that, like, you have to look at things for face value. You know, when you're in an argument, you have to take them for their word, and especially if they don't apologize. But if. If they do, you know, then, you know, all right, you're fine. But, like, you know, take. Take that as, like, also, like, this is the argument I'm going to be having for the rest of my life with this person. You know, if they really hurt my feelings now, imagine what they would do 10 years later down the line. And I think there's such a delicacy with things like disagreements. Like, you have to treat your other half like they're your baby. You know, in a sense, like, if you go too hard on them, it's going to be something that's hard for them to erase. From their mind. If you're someone that yells or says things out of pocket, you have to learn how to correct those mistakes. And sometimes it's hard to acknowledge those post argument, too, that you do things like that. But I think it's something. If you guys want to, like, keep a healthy relationship, you have to acknowledge all those things.
- [53:33]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah, it's so true.
- [53:34]
Host
And like, going into, like, if you genuinely care about the person going into an argument or a disagreement, not trying to make, like, jabs at them because you know it'll hurt them. Like, going at it, like, hey, I'm upset and I'm going to voice. I'm upset. But, like, I want you to hear me and I want you, like, I'm not going to, like, make a dig at you just because I'm upset. Like, I'm actually going to just express to you how I'm feeling. That is, like, super important.
- [54:00]
Chase Huddie
I would fall to my knees and start crying if a girl treated me that nice.
- [54:04]
Host
That's. I mean, yeah, it's easier said than done, but yeah. I also think, like, Taylor and I being together for as long as we have, like, he's very. He's very direct when he's upset and he'll, like, voice it. And I am, like, I'm better now, but I grew up being the least confrontational person ever. Like, we didn't talk about problems in my family. Like, yep, talking wasn't, like, a thing like that. So when Taylor and I first started dating, I was like, I would get, like, freaked out. Like, not in, like, I'm gonna run away, but, like, scared. Like, he was, like, being aggressive. Not aggressive. Aggressive's not the right word. But he was just, like, being so direct with me, and I was like, what is going on? Like, I'm. The world is ending. All of the alarm bells are sounding like, we're breaking up. He doesn't love me anymore. But in actuality, he's literally like, he's fine. He was just hurt by something I did, and he's asking me what my intention was behind it and whatever it is. But learning that is how Taylor reacts. And then him having to learn that I, like, don't speak and, like, go mute for, like, a couple hours. And then I'm, like, able to process what's going on. We both have really had to learn that. So I think if you're, like, in a relationship, like, really trying to learn how the other person communicates. It takes time, obviously, but not blew.
- [55:19]
Chase Huddie
My mind because I. I'm very similar in Situations like that, where sometimes I. I will go mute because I don't really know, like, how to solve a situation in the moment. And then, like, a lot of the times, like, you know, you get in more trouble by being mute, but it's like, no, I really need to wrap my head around, like, what you're trying to say and come back with, like, something that I can, you know, figure out or change about myself. You know, like, if there's something wrong, I always want to see it for what it is and try to make the adjustments how I can. But I like to deal with things in a very comfortable manner. You know, I don't like arguing. I'm like. I hate confrontation more than anything because I think that the other thing that really sucks is if you were to get an argument with somebody, say, it would be two, three hours, you're not gonna get anywhere until you can sit down and start to talk to them. Like. Like, yeah, they're your partner. You know, if you're yelling at each other, you're never gonna resolve anything until you have the peaceful conversation afterwards. Yeah, that's when I've solved every single thing.
- [56:33]
Host
That's why I feel like sometimes me being mute, I'll tease Taylor. I'm like, it's actually helpful because we're not having a heated argument. You have time to simmer down, and I'm actually have time to, like, compute what I'm saying, and then we can have a productive conversation.
- [56:46]
Chase Huddie
Exactly.
- [56:47]
Host
Instead of just, like, going back and forth for a very long time. Yeah, because that's not productive.
- [56:52]
Chase Huddie
No, not at all.
- [56:52]
Host
At all. Looking back at your past relationships, what has it taught you about yourself?
- [56:58]
Chase Huddie
I. I think to be patient and kind and to really, you know, cherish every moment of a relationship. You know, I think you have a lot of happy life lessons that you learn from a relationship, and I think you have a lot of tricky, like, life lessons you have to learn with the relationship, especially, like, kind of getting out one at first. It's. It's a tricky path. You know, you're not always. You're never prepared for it, actually, like, it's. It's not something that you ever really want. That's always the hard part is getting out of a relationship and returning life to normal and figuring out life by yourself. But I've really learned how to come into my own person and to just be a lot more independent, because I've lived with my friends my whole life, and after I lived with my friends, I lived with my ex for two years. And so I still had somebody to live with to like, have a shoulder to cry on and somebody to take on life with. But now living alone has taught me a lot about myself and what I want to do and what I want to prioritize and how I can take charge of everything going on in my life. But I mean, I've, I've learned from those relationships to really, it taught me how to understand a girl in a relationship and how to treat a girl and how to, you know, diligently handle a relationship. And, and that was something that, like, when I grew up, I felt like I always had these like, fake relationships that were never really a thing. They like last like a month. You know, the high school.
- [58:54]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [58:55]
Chase Huddie
Bs. But then like out here, like, I've, I've been in love twice and each time that I've been in live love, I've learned something really valuable. It's a good thing.
- [59:06]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [59:07]
Host
I'm excited for this like, next chapter for you because I think community is important, but I think having some alone time could be like, not beneficial, but helpful. Because my girlfriend recently, she was in a relationship for eight years and they separated and she was like, this is the first time I've ever like, had to think about like, I get decide what I want to eat for dinner or like what I want to watch. Like, just like being like autonomous in a sense. I think it's important for especially people like us who like to be around people and you know, always need that. Like, it's important for us to like, learn that we can do it on our own so that not, it's not other people that we're relying on, it's us.
- [59:53]
Chase Huddie
Yeah. Yeah. I think I've like, kind of with the conversation we were having before, I'm more of a codependent kind of guy.
- [59:59]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [60:00]
Chase Huddie
So to become super independent has just like helped me be miles ahead of, of the curve for myself. I feel like I'm learning myself at such a rapid pace that it's something that I feel like I definitely wasn't focusing on expressing when I was, you know, in a relationship. I, I, I ignored like my love for like video games or certain old movies I like to watch 47 times.
- [60:27]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [60:28]
Chase Huddie
And then like, you know, like old TV shows, like I got back into anime and all these little things that I like to do. Like one of my favorite dishes to cook's a fettuccine Alfredo. So that like, that's one of those things. I hadn't cooked that in fucking four years, you know. Something like that, you know, where you just go, kind of go back to either what you know or what you haven't tried out and you're able to find yourself in the mix and refigure yourself out.
- [60:57]
Co-host/Interviewer
Yeah.
- [60:57]
Host
Okay, last couple questions for you.
- [61:00]
Co-host/Interviewer
I'd love to know what you're most.
- [61:01]
Host
Proud of yourself for.
- [61:05]
Chase Huddie
I'm most proud of myself for never quitting. I think quitting is when everyone that's been rooting against you in your life finally wins. And, I mean, people have always tried to kind of knock me down or discredit me for what I've done in my life. And for me to do all these things that I do, I juggle a lot of things all at the same time. Like, yeah, being musicians, like, 100% where my heart is, but then going and trying acting and feeling like I'm doing a great job there and also been modeling for six years and feeling like I'm doing a good job there. Like, I feel like if I'm continuing to put myself in the places that I really care about and do things like that authentically without giving up, like, that's. That's something I can say I'm super proud of for myself doing at the end of the day, because I. When I was younger, I doubted myself on doing any of these things. So, like, growing up and. And starting to do all the things that I thought were so cool when I was a kid is something that I feel like I'll hold on to and cherish. You know, I'll be able to look back when I'm older and say I'm proud of myself for the career that I have put on. Like, I would never change anything that I've done throughout my career.
- [62:38]
Host
I love that. Okay, last question for you is if you can go back to one moment in your life, what would that be and what would you tell yourself?
- [62:46]
Chase Huddie
If I were to go back to one moment in my life, it would be like, right before I moved out to la, and it would just be kind of a reminder to not be so hard on yourself and to just trust that one day it's all going to work out and that I'll be going through all of these really crazy trials and tribulations to let them know, like, you've got a crazy ride ahead of you, but it's going to make you a better person. And you got to know that while you're going through the weeds, that you're going to make it out a stronger person.
- [63:26]
Host
Yeah, I love that. Well, thanks for coming and chatting with me today?
- [63:29]
Chase Huddie
Yes, absolutely. Thank you for having me.
- [63:31]
Host
We'll leave a link down below for people to go check out your single, but I'm excited for you and all.
- [63:36]
Co-host/Interviewer
That life has for you to come.
- [63:38]
Chase Huddie
Thank you. As to you foreign.
- [64:01]
Host
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