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- [00:00]
Tamsen Fadal
So let me ask you something. When you hear the word mom, what characteristics come to mind do you think? Love, Strength, Resilience. Or maybe comfort knowing her love is always with you. I know motherhood looks different for everyone. Whether you're a mother, whether your mother shaped the person you are today. Then there are some who carry the love of their mom in their hearts in different ways. And that's where Cozy Earth comes in. Cozy Earth is, is the ultimate when it comes to creating comfort. That feels like home. And you know that home feels like mom. I'm absolutely in love with their temperature regulating bedding to their ultra self PJs I wear every night and I have several pairs. Cozy Earth's bamboo pajamas are the perfect gift for yourself or that special person in your life. And you know that to me, sleep is everything between my cozy Earth PJs and the bedding. I sleep through the night these days and I cannot wait to jump into bed at the end of a long day. Your mom deserves the best. Get 40% off with my code. Tamsen@cozyearth.com that's tamsenozyearth.com Dear old work platform.
- [01:06]
Halle Berry
It's not you, it's us. Actually, it is you. Endless onboarding, constant IT bottlenecks. We've had enough. We need a platform that just gets us. And to be honest, we've met someone new. They're called Monday.com and it was love at first. Onboarding. Their beautiful dashboards, their customizable workflows got us floating on a digital cloud. So no hard feelings, but we're moving on. Monday.com, the first work platform you'll love to use.
- [01:35]
Tamsen Fadal
You stood in D.C. shouting at the top of your lungs like, could somebody pay attention?
- [01:40]
Halle Berry
I'm in menopause. Why have we accepted this? We have been drinking the Kool Aid.
- [01:46]
Tamsen Fadal
Menopause has been Hollywood's best kept secret. If you weren't young, you weren't valuable. If you were struggling, you stayed silent. I mean, I was a journalist for 30 years. I never said the word on television. Even Halle Berry, one of the most powerful women in the industry, was told to keep quiet.
- [02:01]
Halle Berry
Some people said to me, ooh, that's going to be a career ender.
- [02:05]
Tamsen Fadal
If it was this hard for her to get answers, what does that mean for the rest of us?
- [02:09]
Halle Berry
He looked at me and he said, I don't want to say it. I said, what? Say it. He said, I can't. I said, menopause, right? He said, yes. And I said, why can't you say that? And he said, I can't say that. Look at you. I can't tell you you're in menopause.
- [02:20]
Tamsen Fadal
And I'm like, now she's sitting down with me on the Tamsen show to break the silence and to share what she's learned, what still needs to change, and how she's creating a space to support women through menopause. What do you do on a daily basis?
- [02:33]
Halle Berry
A whole list of stuff that I will not miss, I have to take.
- [02:37]
Tamsen Fadal
For the first time, she's revealing exactly how she thrives in menopause and what every woman needs to know. And if Halle Berry is willing to put her name on the line to change the conversation, so are we.
- [02:48]
Halle Berry
It's only our favorite topic.
- [02:51]
Tamsen Fadal
Welcome to the Tamsen show. Let's get into it. Today is really a gift as I'm talking to actress and entrepreneur Halle Berry. Halle's in menopause. How do we know that? Well, she stood on Capitol Hill last year and screamed it for all of us. Through her advocacy work, she's pushing for better women's health care, education, and a deeper societal understanding in an industry that really demands we fight to preserve our youth. Halle says there is no way we can be forever 35. At 58, she wants every woman to know menopause isn't the end. What she's about to share will change how you take charge of yourself and your health forever. Halle Berry, welcome to the Tamsen Show. Nice to see you.
- [03:30]
Halle Berry
Thank you. Thank you for having me. I've been a huge fan of yours.
- [03:34]
Tamsen Fadal
I'm a huge fan of yours. First of all, I want to say it has been brilliant to see what you have done and so needed to see what you've done because we've needed voices getting louder and louder. I listened to you in an interview say that making a difference for women in midlife was the reason that you get up every day and the reason that you stay up late at night.
- [03:56]
Halle Berry
Yes. Besides my hot flashes.
- [03:58]
Tamsen Fadal
Besides the hot flashes and night sweats.
- [03:59]
Halle Berry
But, yeah, it's become the single most important part of the work that I will do in my second act. The single most important for sure.
- [04:10]
Tamsen Fadal
What made you know that that was where you were going to be? Did it happen to you? Did it happen to you that it came to you as this is it versus you're going through it? Right. But then you kept saying, like, wait a minute, it's not just about me now. It's about all women.
- [04:25]
Halle Berry
Right. Well, I think the minute I realized that I was in perimenopause, I was 54 years old. And I found out in the most heinous way to me to find this out. And I realized that I knew so little, nobody had ever talked to me. And I had this knowing that if I knew so little, and I feel like I have some world class doctors in California and if none of them really sat me down and talked about this time of my life and prepared me in any way that I'm sure millions and millions of other women are just as in the dark as I was. So I knew that as I advocated for myself, I would essentially be advocating for, for all women. Because, you know, we all, if we live long enough and aging is a privilege, we're all going to go through it. But we can't go through it being stuck on stupid, you know, we can't.
- [05:18]
Tamsen Fadal
Go through it very well said.
- [05:19]
Halle Berry
With no information. That's not, that's not, that's not sustainable. We deserve better.
- [05:27]
Tamsen Fadal
We do deserve better. And there's a lot that has to be done to, to get us to better. I know you've told the story before, but can you talk about that? Because that story I think is heinous and shocking. Shocking and so upsetting on so many different levels.
- [05:41]
Halle Berry
Yeah, well, first of all, I thought I would skip menopause, whatever that was. I thought, you know, I got myself off insulin, I'm a type 2 diabetic, I weaned myself off insulin, then off oral medication. So there was a feeling of, hey, I can do pretty much anything I want to do if I eat right and exercise and take my prioritize my health and well being, right? So I thought, whatever menopause is, I don't know much about it, but I'm sure I'm going to skip it because I'm too healthy. I'm too on top of everything. So when I finally met, which I believe now is the true love of my life, I finally meet my life partner and we're having the best time two can have, right? And we have one night of amazing sex. I wake up the next morning and I try to go to the bathroom and I can't do it. I cannot do it. I am in the most excruciating pain other than having a scratched cornea. There was nothing more painful that I was going through. And it literally took me about 10 minutes to empty my bladder because I had to do it little bit by little bit because it was just so painful. And I went to him and I said, something's really really wrong with me. I have to go to the doctor right now. I don't know what this. It's not a bladder infection. It's not. There's something really wrong. So I go to the doctor, and my doctor, who I had for a very long time, did the examination, and upon looking up there, he said, I can tell you exactly what this is. Okay? What? He said, this is a bad case of herpes. And I said, herpes? How do I have herpes? He said, I don't know, but I'll do the test because I should do it. But I'm telling you, that's what it is. I'll call you in three days when I get the results. And. And I was horrified. I mean, I have this new guy in my life where. And not that herpes is a death sentence, but you would just think if we're in a relationship and if you have herpes, you would just share that information. It's not a deal breaker, but I would like to know that. So I go down there to him and I say, so what? So you got herpes? He said, I don't have herpes. I'm like, well, yeah, you do, because now I have herpes, and I didn't have it before I knew you, so, yeah, you do. And we did this dance back and forth, and he was convinced he didn't have it, so he did the responsible thing. Well, I told him, you're going to go get a test because we're going to find out that you do have herpes. Because somehow. So we do this test, and for 72 hours, we are both just questioning each other and why wouldn't you tell me this? Like, it's really. It's okay. And, you know, trust comes into play, and you just, you know. So we do that whole dance. So first of all, he gets his phone call. First his doctor calls him and says, well, nope, you don't have herpes. So he's like, told you I don't have herpes. And good thing you didn't give it to me. I don't know why you have it, but thank God I don't. My doctor calls about two hours after that and says the same thing. You don't have herpes. I said, I don't have herpes. And he's like, did you want to have herpes? I'm like, no, but you told me I had herpes. And now then what do I have? What is this then? Did not know. Don't. Don't know. But it's not herpes. You know, it was kind of like, be glad about that. I was glad about that, but I was even more disturbed because I didn't have an answer for what I did have. So that was the inciting incident that sort of sent me down the rabbit hole of doing my own investigation and reconnaissance and reading and reading and realizing that it was, you know, dry vagina syndrome. All of our orifice get dry. Right. Eyes, mouth, and vagina. And I've got dry all three. Right. And that got me on my journey of discovery and what made me realize I would be a part of re spin and, you know, building a company that would be the company that I wished I had, the support that I wish I had so that I didn't have to arrive at this moment at 54 just gobsmacked and not having one of my doctors having had a conversation with me about this time of life. They should have been having it with me when I was 40. Right. But now I'm 54, so almost 15 years into this change of life, nobody had talked to me about it.
- [09:54]
Tamsen Fadal
I'm sorry that you went through that. And especially when I think about that initial diagnosis and I think about those 72 hours with somebody that you. You care about, you're getting to know you've been intimate with. Now, you know, this is somebody you want to be with and to have that lack of feeling of trust and I mean, just. It's awful on so many different levels.
- [10:14]
Halle Berry
It is. You know, and. And it's also, I think, cruel to make a diagnosis before you've done a test.
- [10:19]
Tamsen Fadal
Yeah.
- [10:19]
Halle Berry
You know, that's something all doctors should know. Never do that. No, never, never tell someone something like that before. You know what.
- [10:27]
Tamsen Fadal
You know, Please read a chapter on menopause.
- [10:30]
Halle Berry
Yeah.
- [10:30]
Tamsen Fadal
Somewhere. Please. Just one. I want to talk about re spin health and I want to talk about what you've done, because it is so needed, it is so necessary. It's going to bring women who have. Don't even know how confused they're going to be during this time, information so they don't feel confused. Can you talk about the platform, where the idea came from and what you hope it does for women and community.
- [10:56]
Halle Berry
I will talk about it, but I have to say this. It's doing the same thing your book is doing. You're teaching us how to menopause.
- [11:02]
Tamsen Fadal
Thank you.
- [11:02]
Halle Berry
You know, and I know I have gained so much information from reading your book. And it's also just realizing I'm not alone. There's so many stories that I go Yep, yep, yep, yep. And it's so affirming and reassuring when you can read words of other women. So thank you for your book being a guide. It's going to be sort of our bible at Reesman.
- [11:24]
Tamsen Fadal
Thank you.
- [11:25]
Halle Berry
I want you to know that because we all need a book to go to, you know, find the answer. Thank you for that. We're all in this together, right? Well, but RESPIN came about because, as I said, I wanted to build the community that I wish I had. What I've learned is that the more I can talk to women, even the conversations we've had here today, the more I can talk to other women, the better I feel. We all go through it in such a different way. There's 100 symptoms of menopause, for God's sakes, and we all go through it differently. So having a community that we can talk to other women, that we can hear from just right away helps us to destigmatize it. We have to get it out of our bodies. We have to talk about what's happened to us, how much, how little we, we know about it. We have to ask each other questions. So that's a big part of what respin is, a community of like minded women and men. We're going to have some forms for men because men need to understand what's happening. Every man knows a woman, loves a woman, works with a woman, right. Has a daughter. So men need to, you know, also be educated. But so it's about community and then the respin is about care. How do we get the best care for ourselves, right? So we have health coaches that will be there to help hold your hand, help you devise a plan for yourself, give you the most accurate information based on science, right? And clinical trials and studies. Not just wild, Wild West. Well, I heard this, I heard that, but always fact based information that we can rely on as women. Because I believe that when we make decisions for ourselves from an educated place, we feel empowered. Nobody's telling us what to do. We are deciding what to do based on the information that we've been given, right? And then I think those are therapies or plans that we can stick to because we know why we're doing it and we kind of have chosen it. And I think it's, it's true when we say most people need some support to go through this. I know I've needed support in my whole life. I haven't, I've done nothing alone. So why should we have to menopause alone? So we need a community, and we need a coach to help us do that and help us make the right decisions for ourself. If we want to get hrt, we'll help you find your path to hrt. If you want to go a more holistic route, because most, a lot of people don't want to go on hrt, that's fine. We'll help you find what that path should be, help you figure out how to eat better, how to exercise. Everything changes when you get to this time of life, and we'll be there to do that. And one of the big things that we're doing at Re Spin is the more we can talk to women, the more information we can put into our AI database, and that's how we'll be able to actually figure out how women are going through menopause. We have to get the information, we have to hear from women. We have to understand how we're all experiencing this time of life in a different way. That's how we're going to get information. It's almost like we're going to start studying us at Re Spin so we can actually gain that data for ourselves, along with the clinical trials and studies that are going on.
- [14:31]
Tamsen Fadal
But it's so necessary because no one has studied us, really. The fact that we are essentially begging people to study us at this point, and that's really what is happening.
- [14:40]
Halle Berry
Yes.
- [14:40]
Tamsen Fadal
You. You stood in. In D.C. shouting at the top of your lungs, like, could somebody pay attention?
- [14:46]
Halle Berry
Yes.
- [14:46]
Tamsen Fadal
And people did.
- [14:47]
Halle Berry
Yes.
- [14:48]
Tamsen Fadal
But that is the first time people have started paying attention. And it's. It's just shocking to me.
- [14:52]
Halle Berry
Well, because it's been such a taboo, you know, and as women, you know, we have to claim ownership in that taboo because we've been drinking the Kool Aid, we've been brainwashed, and we've been made to believe that it is taboo. We can't talk. And we've also been made to believe that we're only valuable if we're forever 35. Yeah, right. And we've believed. I know when I was 35, I thought that. I thought, my God, one thing I don't want to do is get old, you know? But now that I'm older, I'm like, this is the best thing I could have done. I'm still here. I'm smarter, I'm wiser, I'm more confident. Like, this is an amazing place to. It's a blessing to age.
- [15:32]
Tamsen Fadal
It really is. What do you love about this time in life? Because, I mean, I just have my Own thoughts about what I love. And I was just like you. I was like, 30, 30. If I get beyond this, they're not going to want I'm. They're not going to want me anymore.
- [15:44]
Halle Berry
In the workplace, yeah. You feel like in your relationships you'll be less desirable. Like, all of these things, you know, play, you know, work a havoc on our. On us psychologically, and it's hard. And then when we look around, we see women today turning themselves in the monsters to stay eternally 35. You know, at some point we have to stop that and allow ourselves to do what we're born to do, which is age, but find a graceful way to do it so that we don't turn ourselves into versions of a shell of who we really are. Because we're searching for eternal youth. It's just, why is that the goal? Why does that have to be the goal? I don't know.
- [16:24]
Tamsen Fadal
I think about it now and I. And I actually think about, like, what. What have I learned on the. On the other side of this? Right. My mother didn't live past 51, so I never had that roadmap of what happens next. So seeing women of our age doing beautiful things, I mean, a second chapter. You have done so much, and there's so much more I can see that you're doing with Respin. And it's just, it's gotta be tremendous every day to know the impact that you're gonna have on women, not just our age, but the younger generation. Who should know this at 40 years old, who should know this at 35 years old.
- [16:58]
Halle Berry
Yes. And Respin will be a place for them, too. We'll have younger forums and younger, you know, groups and chats because they need to know what to expect, you know, you know, you do better. So when they know how to prepare for midlife, though, they will arrive at midlife in a much better, much more empowered place. And I also want them to know it's nothing to be afraid of. I know. It's nothing to be afraid of, right? Dear old work platform, it's not you, it's us, actually, it is you. Endless onboarding, constant IT bottlenecks. We've had enough. We need a platform that just gets us. And to be honest, we've met someone new. They're called Monday.com and it was love at first. Onboarding. Their beautiful dashboards, their customizable workflows got us floating on a digital cloud nine. So no hard feelings, but we're moving on. Monday.com, the first work platform you'll love to use. Spring savings are in the air. And at Ross, where they have savings on all the brands you love, from the latest fashion to outdoor decor and even pet supplies, savings are in every aisle. Go to ross and save 20 to 60% off at retailers prices on your favorite spring finds.
- [18:11]
Tamsen Fadal
What would you like to see happen with regard to the research and the clinical trials that need to be done at this point? Because I know that you've had your finger on the pulse of those. I know you're very aware of everything that's going on in D.C. but there's, there's so many different areas that we have work to do.
- [18:24]
Halle Berry
We do. We, we, we have work to do in every area, you know, because, you know, estrogen is in every cell of our body. So it affects every organ in our body, our brains, our hearts, our bones, you know, all of our systems are run off estrogen. And so when that, you know, changes, everything about our body changes. And so we need more research in every single area, quite honestly. And I know that it affects brown and black women disproportionately, you know, and I want to know why is that? Yeah, why is that? Nobody's been able to answer that question. We know that it's true. But I'm searching for the why because if we can figure out the why, maybe we can mitigate that fact, you know, but we don't know why. So more research. More research.
- [19:07]
Tamsen Fadal
Yeah, we don't. We hear that symptoms can start earlier, last longer and be more intense. And yes, nobody can say why that's going on. You know, how to, how to talk about lifestyle changes, how to talk about hormonal versus non hormonal. It's, it's shocking that this is really the first part of that conversation. And most women are getting that information from, from community or from online and not even doctors at this point.
- [19:29]
Halle Berry
Yes. And, you know, and I feel like doctors. And I don't blame doctors and I don't even blame my doctor that misdiagnosed me. I really don't. He did the best he could. He wasn't educated in school on our menopausal body. It wasn't made to be a subject that had great importance. So it's not really his fault. But I will start blaming doctors because now that we're out here talking about it loud and proud and we're demanding that they, that we deserve better, I am going to start blaming doctors if they don't go back and get retooled and they don't really work very hard to understand what's happening to half the population for half of their life. I think it will become something that I think they should be held accountable for pretty soon.
- [20:15]
Tamsen Fadal
Yeah, I agree with you. And especially because there are so many different solutions out there that we're seeing more and more come up and lifestyle changes have to be part of that solution. It cannot be poo pooed as, you know, do do this one pill or this one patch or this one thing and everything else is a, you know, optional.
- [20:32]
Halle Berry
Yeah. And because we go through it all so differently, how can it be like a one, you know, it's not a one trick pony.
- [20:37]
Tamsen Fadal
When you were at the Capitol and you shouted I'm in menopause, did you, did you know the reaction that was going to get when you, when you went back and looked at it? I, I just, I could feel it was in your, you know, it's just like in your, it just came from you, you know, and I, I, I was so happy. I went. When I saw that the first time, I went, oh, thank goodness, somebody, she is saying this out loud. Did you, did you have any idea when you went back and looked at that? No.
- [21:01]
Halle Berry
And didn't care?
- [21:02]
Tamsen Fadal
Yeah. I love that.
- [21:03]
Halle Berry
I was so angry in that moment.
- [21:06]
Tamsen Fadal
Why were you so angry?
- [21:07]
Halle Berry
Because I had to be there and I had to be shouting and I had to wake people up to the importance of this topic. You know, I was angry when I really realized that I reached 54 and nobody had talked to me about this. I was angry. I felt that I had been unseen for so long and uncared for, you know, and marginalized. And I was angry. I was really angry when I first went to Washington and I tried to, you know, keep my lid on because I wanted to do some good work, but I was seething. I was really seething that I even had to be there fighting for the basic human rights of women and 2024 at the time.
- [21:49]
Tamsen Fadal
Yeah, it's stunning. And not all reaction has been like, thank you so much. Right. You've had re, you've had a lot of different, I think we all have had a lot of different reaction. But you've had people come up to you directly and say, yeah, why, why, why are you doing this?
- [22:03]
Halle Berry
Yeah. And like I just told you earlier that, you know, sometimes when I talk in these health, you know, seminars or talks to a group of people, I look out in the audience and I see the face of usually men and they just look gobsmacked or they looked bored or they're looking at their watch or their phone or like they're not really interested. And they come up to me afterwards and they're like, ah, that was hard to hear. I don't know if I needed to hear that. And I said, you don't know if you needed to hear that? I said, well, I don't know if I need to be going through this, but guess what? I am. And there's nothing I can do about it. So you're gonna have to hear it, buddy. I'm really sorry, but you're gonna have to hear it. And that part has been liberating to sort of force it on some people, because we're not gonna get change if we don't. We will not get people to wake up if we don't make them sit through some uncomfortable conversations, talk about things they don't want to talk about. Right. Women, you have to be able to your husbands about what's going on with your body. I have a friend that almost got a divorce. He was married for 22 years. He said to me one day, he said, I don't know what's wrong with my wife. I think I'm going to get a divorce. I said, what do you mean, what's wrong with your wife? Why is it her fault? He said, every time I go to try to touch her and I want to get intimate, she pulls away. I think she's cheating. She no longer wants me anymore. We have no sex life anymore. And I said, let me tell you something. Go talk to her about what's going on down there. Go talk to her about the fact that she might be going through menopause. And he said, I can't talk to my wife about that. I said, this is your problem. You have to go talk to her about it. He swore to me he couldn't. I can't do that. She's already not into me. If I try to make her feel like she's old, I can kiss her goodbye. I said, go talk to her. I'm requiring you to go talk to her.
- [23:53]
Tamsen Fadal
I love that.
- [23:53]
Halle Berry
And you know what he found out that every time he went to touch her, it's not that she didn't want him. She thought that every touch or every moment that she felt like he was trying to be intimate, it was going to lead to sex. And sex had become so painful, she didn't want to have sex. So she was just trying to avoid it at all cost. But it had nothing to do with her desire to be with him or she was still in love with him. And they almost got a divorce. He almost filed for a divorce because he was sure she was no longer interested and she was probably having an affair.
- [24:25]
Tamsen Fadal
Oh, my gosh. Were they so grateful to you for that? Because pushing that. Yeah, that wouldn't have happened.
- [24:32]
Halle Berry
No, it wouldn't have happened. And this is. He would have been a part of that statistic. You know, you're married for 20, 25 years, and then you just think you've lost the spark of your relationship because you're not communicating about the things that really matter at that time of life. You're too afraid, it's too stigmatized, and so you just stay quiet and you. And you divorce. And now they're thriving.
- [24:54]
Tamsen Fadal
Oh, I love hearing that. You notice, though, how these all kind of fall into these patterns because I completely. The minute you said that, I was like, I bet that she's scared it's going to lead to sex. Like, that's. That's what I was thinking. Because I understand it. I. I went through it. I got remarried at 50 years old. And so in, in those. Those are real. Those are real things that you don't want to. You don't even know how to talk about. Right. You don't even if you think you do know how to talk about them.
- [25:16]
Halle Berry
Right. But something I learned, you have it in your book, too, is that why does that time of life, like, when you. When you're at this stage and you're going through menopause, it gets better. And why? Because like you said, it's true for me, too. You take your time now.
- [25:30]
Tamsen Fadal
Yeah.
- [25:30]
Halle Berry
You have to take your time now. So it's no longer a. In our youth, it could sometimes be like a wham, bam, thank you, man.
- [25:37]
Tamsen Fadal
Totally.
- [25:37]
Halle Berry
Now it can't be no wham bam, thank you. Have to take time. And it becomes an experience now that I so look forward to because you just have to take your time so we can get to where we need to get. And when we get there, it's like a whole new experience. And so I want women to know it does get better. Once you know what to do, you know better, you do better. It. It does get better.
- [26:01]
Tamsen Fadal
I love that I want them to hear that from you because I think that it's. It's sometimes hard to convey that when you're going through the. The painful sex.
- [26:08]
Halle Berry
Yes.
- [26:08]
Tamsen Fadal
And. And feeling low libido, feeling not a trap, feeling not confident of yourself, all those things just kind of pile on. And.
- [26:14]
Halle Berry
Yes.
- [26:15]
Tamsen Fadal
You don't know where to begin. Unraveling it all. But it does get better. And I think there's a. There's a couple of things that, you know, women should know. They have to get to know themselves, too. I think we haven't spent a lot of time doing that. I mean, or even being taught how.
- [26:27]
Halle Berry
To do that and get comfortable with ourselves, too, in our. And our changing bodies, you know, realizing we're not going to be forever 35 and who wants to be, but find the beauty in this stage and have self acceptance, have self love. We can't expect someone else to accept us and love us if we can't do that for ourselves. Right. So we have to work on that. And only we can make those shifts.
- [26:48]
Tamsen Fadal
You are very clear at who you are. And that's always. It's a. That's a really beautiful thing when somebody knows who they are and they understand, you know, what they believe and what's next for them. And I know that doesn't always comes easy. It comes with a lot of work. Where did you get that feeling and that confidence and that understanding at this age of who you are?
- [27:07]
Halle Berry
Being a black woman, I have always had to have a clear understanding of who I was in every stage. You know, I have felt behind the eight ball my whole life. Being a black woman like a double whammy. And I've always had to fake it until I'm, you know, fake it till you make it syndrome. I've had. I had to believe in myself when nobody believed in me in order to get anywhere. And so now that I reached this stage of my life, it's the same philosophy that I still carry with me. I had to believe in my own worth since I can remember believing anything. And so the ability to believe in my own worth, now that I've reached this new stage of life and I'm morphing into another version of myself, I've got to believe it before I can get other people to believe that this is a very valuable stage of life for me and that I'm just getting started, started with something new. I have to believe that because I've always had to believe that about myself. So that's my journey.
- [28:13]
Tamsen Fadal
Well, I love that, and I can. I can feel it. And. And I think that people want to know where to find that confidence. You know, this is a difficult time, but when they see you feeling confident about talking about it, talking about menopause, I have to imagine most of Hollywood's like, oh, thank goodness she's saying this. Finally, somebody is speaking for us because I know that those are, those are careers and that's where you're trying to be forever 25, for goodness sake.
- [28:39]
Halle Berry
Well, you know, when I first sort of put the word out to some feelers, to my close inner circle, that I was gonna now go on this second act menopause movement, you'd be surprised. Some people said to me, ooh, that's gonna be a career ender. Are you ready to just go do that and quit acting? Because that could be really. Are you sure you wanna align yourself with the word menopause? Like that means and you know, and I said, that's exactly why I want to align my name with that word because that's what needs to change. You're saying that we're not enough because we're going through a natural part of being a woman. You're diminishing me because I'm doing something that I have no choice not to do and you're diminishing me for that. You're the ones thinking about this in a wrong way, not me. And that's exactly why I'm doing. And if I don't have any more parts, then.
- [29:35]
Tamsen Fadal
And that's not what happened.
- [29:36]
Halle Berry
I don't have any more parts.
- [29:37]
Tamsen Fadal
And that's not what's happened at all.
- [29:38]
Halle Berry
It's not what's going to happen because I say, no, that's not going to happen.
- [29:41]
Tamsen Fadal
Absolutely.
- [29:42]
Halle Berry
That's not going to happen.
- [29:43]
Tamsen Fadal
Absolutely. I'm so glad you did and I'm so glad, I'm so glad you've had your voice. And I'm, I, I think that, I mean, it's going to change this narrative and we're going to get rid of that word taboo at some point, which is what is so necessary. What would you tell 35 year old? Hallelujah.
- [29:58]
Halle Berry
Oh girl, do not fear aging. Because I was afraid of it at 35. If I'm honest, I was like every woman. I don't want that to happen to me. I would tell myself, honey, don't be afraid of that. You're gonna feel your, like your best self then. And at 35, I couldn't have imagined that, but I couldn't have imagined sitting in a room and feeling like no matter who's on the other side of me, I can say exactly what I want to say, whether you like it or not. Always be respectful and kind because I want people to treat me that way. But I have a right to have my feelings. I have a right to say exactly what I want to say. And I didn't feel that way, at 35, I was still the dancing bear. I was still trying to please everybody and I wanted everybody to like me and I wanted to be the good girl and I wanted. And I'm no longer her. I'm no longer her. And that feels so empowered. And I wish my 35 year old self knew that this day was coming.
- [30:53]
Tamsen Fadal
I love that though, because everybody gets that. Everyone, everyone feels that. I want everyone to like me. I want everyone. But I think we get here because of what we've. Because of the roads, right? Because of what we've gone through, what we haven't gone through, who we've met along the way. And, and so maybe it's true, we.
- [31:07]
Halle Berry
Can'T get here a moment before we get here because it's those life experiences, I guess, that allow us to be here today as women of almost the same age saying, I don't really care what anybody thinks about me anymore.
- [31:20]
Tamsen Fadal
I'm sure glad you're here.
- [31:22]
Halle Berry
Yeah. Thank you.
- [31:24]
Tamsen Fadal
You know, you've taken on a whole new business career pivot. There's a lot that goes with it. Have there been stresses along the way? Has it been exciting along the way? What do you, what do you want to see happen with, with Re Spin and where it goes? And I know there's different pillars of it and I think that the pillars are very unique and very necessary for the wholeness of a woman.
- [31:46]
Halle Berry
Yes. Well, it's been the last, I'd say two and a half years in the making and building and it's been exciting to now be an entrepreneur and a founder, a co founder. It's been challenging. I've never had to go out and work so hard to raise money like the whole VC world. That's not my, you know, I'm an actor, an artist. Like that's been a whole, you know, adventure for me and I've learned so much and I've learned how hard it is you can have an idea and want to do something. But in order to make that happen, I had to align myself with the best of the best and find a bunch of really smart people that were as passionate about this cause as I am. And it took time to find those people and align with those people. We had to find the most perfect coaches because coaching is so much a part of what Re Spin offers and the joys have been. We did a beta over the summer and we sort of tested our model and to find out that 90% of the women reported increase in the way they felt and increased benefits from going through our program, two thirds of the women actually had improvement and we weren't selling them anything. We didn't have a product to put them on. We gave them coaching, information and community, other like minded women. And it shifted them in a major, major way. So that's what let us know we're onto something. This is what women really need. And we're not preaching, we're not telling them how to do it. We're just providing a safe place to hug them, hold them and help them figure it out and give them really the state of the art, the most accurate information as we get it. We'll be passing it along.
- [33:42]
Tamsen Fadal
It's so great because there's so much misinformation, confusion and you know, and everyone's going back and forth and I think to have a solid place with science, back an incredible, you know, board of advisors with medical board of advisors that you have, which is a beautiful thing to see. You know what no one told me about menopause? That it doesn't just happen, it hits you. The brain fog, the sleepless nights, the exhaustion. I felt like I was losing control of my own body. And for a while I thought maybe this is just how it is. But then I realized it doesn't have to be. I started digging into the science, talking to experts and trying real solutions that actually work. And that's why I wrote how to Menopause. Because you and I deserve answers. This book is your blueprint for navigating menopause with confidence, understanding your body, and feeling stronger, healthier and even better than before. If you're ready to stop feeling stuck and start taking charge, this is your moment. Grab your copy of how to menopause now at howtomenopause. And unlock some exclusive bonuses to help you get started today.
- [34:54]
Halle Berry
I think you're on mute. Workday starting to sound the same. I think you're on mute. Find something that sounds better for your career on LinkedIn.
- [35:04]
Tamsen Fadal
With LinkedIn job collections, you can browse curated collections by relevant industries and benefits.
- [35:10]
Halle Berry
Like Flexpto or hybrid workplaces so you can find find the right job for you.
- [35:16]
Tamsen Fadal
Get started@LinkedIn.com jobs finding where you fit. LinkedIn knows how.
- [35:23]
Halle Berry
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- [35:52]
Tamsen Fadal
Bank of America Corporation I don't know about you, I didn't understand the definition of community growing. Now, now that I look back on it, it's very different now than it was then. I thought, like, I got a couple of. Got a couple girlfriends and, yeah, they're my people and it's all good.
- [36:06]
Halle Berry
Yeah.
- [36:06]
Tamsen Fadal
Now I understand what community means. It means something very different to me and it actually does hold me up in a. In a whole different way.
- [36:13]
Halle Berry
Yes. And we need that, you know, and especially as women, we need that. And we need that during this time because we have. We have a lot of work to do to change culture around how we're seen in our later years. We have a lot of work to do to destigmatize menopause. I mean, I don't. I don't even like the word anymore. I know, like, I want to try to come up with another word at Re span that we can call it. You know, we have a lot of work to do, and it's going to take every single one of us in this movement, you know, to lock arms and support each other. Right. And this is the thing I want to do. I want us to start having shiestas. You know how we have baby showers, shedding showers. When a woman realizes that she's in the menopause, you know, 365 days and, you know, you're in it, I think that woman's family, it's their duty to give that woman a shiesta and celebrate her.
- [37:06]
Tamsen Fadal
I love that.
- [37:07]
Halle Berry
Like, we do every other milestone in our life, right?
- [37:10]
Tamsen Fadal
Yes. We should be celebrating. Yes. That changes those words.
- [37:13]
Halle Berry
Yes.
- [37:13]
Tamsen Fadal
I said the day the taboo doesn't come next to the word menopause, it will be the day that we know that we have really changed this narrative and seen it.
- [37:20]
Halle Berry
And I want it to be, I'm in menopause. You get a shiesta. Like, I want it to feel.
- [37:25]
Tamsen Fadal
I hope you throw the first one for somebody. I love that. Let's do it. That would be a amazing. To show up at a woman's house. That would be great.
- [37:31]
Halle Berry
Do it.
- [37:31]
Tamsen Fadal
There's some beauty in that. There's beauty in the celebration of all of it. And I know that, you know, relationships with girlfriends come into play. I know with family things come into play. Love comes into play. I mean, this is a time That I never thought. I never thought that that was part of this. But that's where I feel like that beautiful part of midlife comes. Comes together for us all.
- [37:49]
Halle Berry
Yes. And we can have all of it. You know, we don't have to lose one single ounce of what made our life full when we were in our 20s and 30s. I just think it gets. I think it gets actually a lot better.
- [38:03]
Tamsen Fadal
Lisa Moscone's book. I know I was there. You had gone through it backward and forward, as I did. The book is brilliant in so many ways.
- [38:10]
Halle Berry
Yes.
- [38:11]
Tamsen Fadal
What did you see in that book? What did that book do for you?
- [38:14]
Halle Berry
That was the first book I read on the subject. And it's the first time I realized how much our lack of estrogen affects our brain.
- [38:22]
Tamsen Fadal
Brain.
- [38:22]
Halle Berry
Right. And I realized it was more than a hot flash. It was more just feeling uncomfortable. That if we didn't get that. If I didn't get this under control, it could really have really damaging effects. As I went down the path of life, as I call it. And I was fascinated by that. And that's also part of why I went to Washington. Because I thought, this is a real. This is a real problem that's happening here. And when we're told just to grit our teeth and bear it, it's really causing us major health issues. Even if we could bear it. So what. What is that going to mean for us on the other side of bearing that it could be early dementia, Alzheimer's. Like, we really have to start taking this seriously. In her book. That was a huge eye opening, wake up call for me.
- [39:06]
Tamsen Fadal
Yeah, I think it was for me too. Understanding the long term ramifications when you're talking about brain, cardiovascular, bone. I had. Yes. I just thought if you got through the symptoms, then that would be okay. I didn't understand it at one point. There's really long term health consequences of.
- [39:21]
Halle Berry
That's what we all thought, that it's just symptom management. Right? Exactly right.
- [39:27]
Tamsen Fadal
Exactly right.
- [39:28]
Halle Berry
To our bodies.
- [39:28]
Tamsen Fadal
Exactly right.
- [39:29]
Halle Berry
But now we know.
- [39:30]
Tamsen Fadal
What do you do on a daily basis? Do you have. Do you have some must dos in terms of. I mean, you've always been like this with your health, but are there some things that have changed or shifted in the past? I don't know, three or four or five years?
- [39:41]
Halle Berry
There has. I'm on like probably 16 vitamins now.
- [39:46]
Tamsen Fadal
I can match you. I can match you to my 12.
- [39:50]
Halle Berry
I got a whole list of stuff that I will not miss. I have to take. I'm religious about It. I have studied all the different things that I'm taking that are right for my body within an inch of my life. I believe in every single one of them, and I will not miss it. No. No matter what. That's been really important. I still, you know, work out pretty, you know, religiously. And now it's very much for optimum good health. Like, I don't want to fall down and, like, break a hip because as we know, that could be the beginning of the end. So keeping my lean muscle mass on is important. I started taking testosterone, which I never thought. Ignorantly. I thought, I'm not trying to grow hair on my chest.
- [40:27]
Tamsen Fadal
Like, you know, do you notice a difference with it?
- [40:29]
Halle Berry
I do.
- [40:30]
Tamsen Fadal
Me too.
- [40:31]
Halle Berry
Libido.
- [40:32]
Tamsen Fadal
Yeah, I know.
- [40:34]
Halle Berry
And I have more.
- [40:35]
Tamsen Fadal
I found it again. I found my libido.
- [40:37]
Halle Berry
Right. Isn't it good when you find that?
- [40:38]
Tamsen Fadal
It's really good. It was MIA for a little while.
- [40:41]
Halle Berry
But I also, I eat differently now. I used to be keto because that's how I manage my diabetes. And now I've learned at that this stage of life, I need a little carbs. I need that for energy because my energy levels are different and I manage my sugar, you know, by cutting out other things. But they're little adjustments that I've had to make along the way as I've really understood what's happening in, in my body, because, you know, we all have different bodies and go through it differently.
- [41:05]
Tamsen Fadal
Yeah. I think with so many symptoms when, when women are 34, it's one thing when they hear. Now we've talked about it over a hundred, yes, symptoms, it's shocking, but not so shocking because when you look at what estrogen does at all, different areas from your eyes, your mouth, your ears, I mean, just, it's unbelievable. And women felt like they were losing it, not realizing it was, it was all that.
- [41:26]
Halle Berry
I went to see my eye doctor and I couldn't see. I was seeing these white sort of flashes through. And I went to him and I said, and I said, what is this? And he looked at me and he said, oh, no, I, I, I don't want to say it. I said, what? Say it. He said, I, I, I can't. I said, say it. He said, I can't. I said, menopause, right? He said, yes. I think it's because of. What are you in the Perry now? I think it's because of that. And I said, why can't you say that? And he said, I can't say that. Look at you. I can't tell you you're in menopause.
- [42:00]
Tamsen Fadal
And I'm like, oh my gosh.
- [42:03]
Halle Berry
I said, this is why I'm doing what I'm doing. If our healthcare practitioners can't say the words to us, how can they treat us?
- [42:11]
Tamsen Fadal
No. Isn't that stunning though? That's stunning.
- [42:13]
Halle Berry
Because what he told me was that.
- [42:15]
Tamsen Fadal
Do you think it was going to insult you? Yes.
- [42:17]
Halle Berry
He's worried about us. I'm like, you should be worried about me going blind and my ducks drying up.
- [42:25]
Tamsen Fadal
Get over insulting these unbelievable.
- [42:28]
Halle Berry
Doctor, please.
- [42:29]
Tamsen Fadal
And what was that? Was it lack of estrogen?
- [42:31]
Halle Berry
Yes.
- [42:32]
Tamsen Fadal
Really? I didn't know that.
- [42:33]
Halle Berry
Lack of estrogen. The. The glands that are under my, under all of our eyes here start to dry up because we get dry eyes, dry mouth, dry vagina. Right. So they start to dry up. The problem is once those glands dry up, you don't get them back.
- [42:47]
Tamsen Fadal
Okay.
- [42:48]
Halle Berry
And you have major problems for the rest of your life with dry eyes and all the complications that that causes. And so luckily he found the courage to tell me about this just in the nick of time. But I still had to get like an eight thousand dollar treatment of like Lipiflow and radio frequency that insurance does not cover. But that's what I was facing because nobody dared to have the conversation with me and warn me that this would be happening and put me on some other kind of maintenance and care plan before that happened. And I was again furious. And I didn't blame my doctor because he is afraid because it's such a stigma, he doesn't want to talk about his patients. So all of these things that happened, Tam said, just let me know I am on the right path to getting people to talk about this. And of course it's something I have to do. So it's not even a want, it's a I have to do this.
- [43:42]
Tamsen Fadal
There's no choice. You have to spearheading a conversation that is long overdue and needs to be had.
- [43:47]
Halle Berry
Yes, we have to have. And all of us have to have it. You're spearheading heading one as well. We all have to have it. We're in this together.
- [43:52]
Tamsen Fadal
I see you working on Instagram all the time. What are you doing?
- [43:55]
Halle Berry
Because we need to know that I'm doing all kinds of stuff. What I have learned now that I've gotten down the path of life that have to do things differently. I used to do a lot of cardio, right now I do no cardio. I'm trying to put muscle mass on. So I do I lift Weights now. And I never used to lift weights before. I only did my own body weight and cardio and cycling and running. Now I just do pretty much boring what I find boring. But it's necessary for this stage of life really. Just heavier weights than I've ever lifted and I do it probably two days more a week than I used to.
- [44:36]
Tamsen Fadal
Wow. That's great though, right?
- [44:37]
Halle Berry
Yeah.
- [44:37]
Tamsen Fadal
It is funny that we avoided the, the weight room for a long time. Like it wasn't even. I didn't even think about it. It was like where the guys were in their sweating and I.
- [44:46]
Halle Berry
Because I never wanted to get like muscly. Yeah. You know, I wanted to just stay healthy. I was doing it to manage my diabetes, but I didn't want to be muscly. And now I'm lifting heavy weights and I'm still not getting muscly. I'm just like holding on to the muscle I have to the. And that's important at this age of.
- [45:02]
Tamsen Fadal
So important. So important that we do that to protect the bones.
- [45:05]
Halle Berry
Yes, yes.
- [45:06]
Tamsen Fadal
Everybody wants to know go to products. It's going to be a big part of respin. There's going to be products on there, correct?
- [45:11]
Halle Berry
Yes.
- [45:11]
Tamsen Fadal
What are some of your go to right now?
- [45:13]
Halle Berry
Well, one that I really love.
- [45:17]
Tamsen Fadal
That.
- [45:17]
Halle Berry
I had to hand in helping create is a product called Let Spin. It's a collab that I did with Joy Lux and Re Spin and it's the first product that we have helped design at Re Spin because it, you know, it met the need of the co founder and I think that's where my focus was when we first, you know, started to build the brand. How can I help myself? Help my intimacy.
- [45:42]
Tamsen Fadal
Yes.
- [45:42]
Halle Berry
I was struggling big time there and so we came up with this. Let's spin. And, and let me tell you, you're gonna spin. You're gonna spin with less spin.
- [45:52]
Tamsen Fadal
Take a spin.
- [45:52]
Halle Berry
I'm really proud of it. Yeah, it's a, it's a. It, it works. It really does.
- [45:57]
Tamsen Fadal
That's what we need.
- [45:58]
Halle Berry
A godsend.
- [45:58]
Tamsen Fadal
Yeah, that's what we need.
- [45:59]
Halle Berry
But I also love this product. I started taking creatine recently as and I this product by called Create. It's a creatine. They're little gummy sugar free gummies. You just take two of those a day. And that's really been my go to.
- [46:13]
Tamsen Fadal
Wonderful.
- [46:13]
Halle Berry
I also got an eight sleep. Do you have an eight sleep?
- [46:16]
Tamsen Fadal
No, I don't. Somebody else was telling me about this. Is it great?
- [46:19]
Halle Berry
It's great.
- [46:20]
Tamsen Fadal
What? Because your side can be Cool. And yes.
- [46:23]
Halle Berry
What is your side can be cool.
- [46:25]
Tamsen Fadal
What is your side down to? Is there. Is it a like 65 or something? I don't know. How does it do it?
- [46:30]
Halle Berry
Well, it's not necessarily. You don't know the temperature.
- [46:32]
Tamsen Fadal
Okay.
- [46:32]
Halle Berry
You just like you're on. On a one or you're like a minus 1, 2, 3, 4 or you're 8, 9, 10, being very warm. So you can adjust your side from your partner's side and it fluctuates all through the night. It starts to learn your sleep habits and then it starts to be on autopilot and it adjusts for you based on what it's learning about you as you sleep on it night after night. It gives you a sleep score in the morning. Kind of like, you know, any kind of, you know, life bit or Fitbit. But it's just been, you know, I no longer have to use my ceiling fan that I installed because now I'm at the right temperature in my bed every night and it's been a game changer.
- [47:08]
Tamsen Fadal
Oh, that's great.
- [47:09]
Halle Berry
Great.
- [47:09]
Tamsen Fadal
It's great for relationships too. I have a feeling. Because I'm always pulling everything off of me and pushing it over that side of the bed.
- [47:15]
Halle Berry
Yes. No more.
- [47:16]
Tamsen Fadal
I'll have to try that.
- [47:17]
Halle Berry
Yes.
- [47:18]
Tamsen Fadal
Thank you. You have said that menopause needs a rebrand. What does that rebrand look like?
- [47:22]
Halle Berry
I think, you know, we need to understand that this is not a time of life that we should be afraid of, that we should not talk about. Right. We should realize that what we are going through is something that's normal and very natural. We don't have a disease. We're not sick. This is the most normal and natural thing that we can do. It's about our female longevity. That's really what it's about, right? It's, it's, it's the second half of, of our life and it's nothing to be ashamed of or to fear.
- [47:57]
Tamsen Fadal
And a pretty beautiful half.
- [47:58]
Halle Berry
Yeah. Very beautiful half.
- [48:01]
Tamsen Fadal
Thank you so much.
- [48:02]
Halle Berry
Thank you for having me.
- [48:03]
Tamsen Fadal
You are so wonderful. You're just a very, very special person.
- [48:06]
Halle Berry
Thank you. Thank you.
- [48:07]
Tamsen Fadal
Her words, her wisdom. Menopause isn't the end. It's the beginning of your second act. Halle Berry has proved this. Halle, thank you so much for teaching us how to move forward with confidence. Let's continue this conversation for ourselves and for others. If you have questions or comments, I would love to hear them message us at the Tamson show. And remember, this is a brand new show, so please subscribe. And rate us wherever you get your podcasts. The Tamsen show is an original production by Authentic Wave executive producers Scott Weinberger, Kevin Bennett and Rebecca Grierson. Brand director Johanna Ofsnik. Our line producer is Sabrina Sarre, editing by Zach Smith and Marquis Harris. Time is precious and so are our pets. So time with our pets is extra precious. That's why we started Dutch. Dutch provides 247 access to licensed vets with unlimited virtual visits and follow ups for up to five pets. You can message a vet at any time and schedule a video visit the same day. Our vets can even prescribe medication for many ailments and shipping is always free. With Dutch, you'll get more time with your pets and year round peace of mind when it comes to their vet care.