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Tim Dillon
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim Dillon Show. Are we excited about the cease fire? I am pumped about the ceasefire between Israel and Hamas. It's a ceasefire, baby. What about. What happened to that? What happened to the days when, like, Bruce Springsteen would write a song like, that is what I desire, a ceasefire. And it would be a moment. I don't feel like we have enough of those today. We don't have moments. We don't. We don't have a nice moment. Like a nice, you know. Now people are mad at Israel because the ceasefire starts on Sunday, officially. And yesterday I think they killed a bunch of people that were celebrating the ceasefire. That's what happened. They were. There was a bunch of people celebrating the ceasefire and Israel killed them. Well, listen, have you ever said, I'm starting a diet on Monday? What do you do Sunday? It's lasagna night. So this Israel starting a diet of no killing of the Palestinians on Sunday. They're starting a strict ketogenic, no carbs, killing Palestinian babies at all for any reason on Sunday. But up until Sunday, you're going to loosen the belt loop a couple. No, I mean, it's like, Sunday we're going to do the right thing, but tonight we dine in hell. I mean, that's kind of the. Israel ramps up deadly airstrikes on Gaza after a cease file deal is reached. They need a few days to get it out of their system. From what I understand, they need a few days. You can't go cold turkey on killing. You have to ease off. You got to ease off. You know, when I was in fifth grade, I was coming down a hill in Goshen, New York. It's a. It's a suburb in Rockland County. It might be Putnam, either Putnam or Orange or Rockland county, it doesn't matter. The point is, I was coming down a hill, I did a. I pumped the brakes, I flew off the bike and I got scars on the elbows. Rocks and everything went on the elbow because I pumped the br. And I flew off. I mean, I'm sorry. I jammed on the brakes. I didn't pump them. You got to pump the brake. You got to slow down at a speed that doesn't just jolt you. And I didn't. So Israel's going to have to. You got to give them a minute. They've really been killing now for the span of what, two years? Is it two years of this? A lot of it, right? Almost two years. It's almost two years of them kind of, you know, killing. So they have to Take a little, you know, and hopefully, you know, by Sunday they can kind of like chill. And now, Hamas, remember? Hamas. Hamas is going to let the hostages out. But before that happens, right here it says, Israel, Hamas cease for a deal will go into effect. Too late for Akram Abu Ahmed to see his children again, his family's sole survivor after an Israeli airstrike. Ahmed was sleeping in the area of Gaza City in the early hours of Thursday, celebrating the news of the truce, when he heard a loud sound and he was thrown into the air. Dust and screams around me for Israel to attack. Like it's a party to celebrate the truce and Israel. I mean, it's really, it's really, it's out of line. But also, like, there's a level of irony there that cannot even fully be understood unless you are one of the people at that party having fun. Maybe there's a dance, like kind of like a ceasefire, like, you know, like one of the dances they do. And then there it is. This is going on, everyone's happy. And then you go, hold on, what's that? What's that noise? Look at how happy everyone is then. Then there is a noise and everybody looks at each other and it's like, you know, Dana, da na na na na, da da da, da, da, da, da, da da. It's the curb your enthusiasm music. Because, you know, you're out there celebrating a cease fire and then you get killed during the ceasefire celebration. It's one minute, it's a celebration of a ceasefire. The next minute someone's leg is in your lap and you're like, what is going on? I thought we were done with this. But Israel says, no, no, no, no, no. Sunday. You're a little early. You're a little early. We're starting this Sunday. We are not. Today is not part of it. I wonder if Israel said that. Today is not part of it. We're going to get a few airstrikes in before we start. And they killed 115 people. Well, I'm going to call this right now. I don't know if I'm right and I'm going to say this and people might get angry with me or people might not agree with me. I'm going to make a stunning prediction on this program, on this show, in front of everybody, in front of the world. I'm going to put my name on the line right now. I'm very happy about the ceasefire deal, but. But I'm going to say this. I don't believe I'm putting myself out there. I don't believe this is the end of the problems between these two. I just don't, I just don't. I just don't. They're, call me a cynic, I believe that there's going to be some residual bad blood. I'll say it, I'll say it. I believe personally now it might not be true, I don't know. I'm just saying there could be perhaps potentially, possibly some residual bad blood between these two groups. Because I gotta be honest with you, I just think that even though they have this nice ceasefire, they did. Israel killed 28 children and 31 women in this at the ceasefire party where they all. Hey, by the way, stop going to ceasefire parties. Apparently that's pretty hazardous to your health. Don't do that. Israel and Hamas and it's kind of become a war on the civilians of Gaza though. I mean, let's be honest. I know that it's supposed to be just a war on Hamas, but it feels to me, again an observer, that it is more sort of becoming a war on the civilian because it's there, it's a lot of civilians. Now I know that Israel will say that 4 year old was in Hamas and he might have been, I don't know. I don't know. And that seems to be the argument. Many of these toddlers are in Hamas. But I don't know, I just think there could be, there could be some residual. So right now in Gaza, they say 46,707 people have been killed, about 17,500 children injured more than 109,000 people and missing more than 11,000. Yeah, Israel killed about 1139, injured 8730. With the Israel, that's the Israeli death toll versus the Gaza death toll. Now these death tolls may not be accurate. The missing, clearly the, the missing people in Gaza are probably not thriving is my guess. I guess the. I would, I would add most of the missing to the death toll. It would be what I, if I was, if I was sitting down at the Wynn in Vegas and I was a gambling man and they said, what do you think happened to those missing people in Gaza? I go, well. And then I would move the chips into the dead. There would be, there'd be a table. One thing would say dead, the circle. And I would just take all the missing chips and I'd go, but I'd make a face. It'd be sad. I go, put them there because they're probably no longer with us. That would be my guess. I don't know. They could be thriving. I don't know. I mean, perhaps they're thriving. I don't think so. What are we going to do with these kids? Steve Witkoff, a real estate entrepreneur, went over there and Netanyahu, he said, I'm meeting you on the Sabbath. And Netanyahu is like, well, I'm on the Sabbath. And Witkoff's like, hey, man, I don't give a shit. I don't care what you're doing. I'm also a Jew, but I don't give a fuck. We're getting this thing done. And he went over there and he basically said, listen, there's gonna be hell to pay. We've been a great friend to Israel. You have to be a friend to us. We need a ceasefire right now. Trump is coming in and we're not gonna do this anymore. Witkoff's a friend to Trump. He was golfing with Trump. The second assassination attempt. Witkoff's real estate developer, and he's buddies with Trump, and basically he's new to diplomacy. Witkoff, he hasn't done anything like this before. But Trump was like, you know, you go over there and carry this message to Netanyahu, tell him, we're kind of done here, we're done with this. We cannot have this go on anymore. We need a ceasefire deal. And now Gaza is going to release the hostages. And I'm going to tell you this, and now people are going to get mad at me for saying this. I want grateful hostages when they come out. I want happy hostages, and I want hostages ready to turn the page. I do, I do. Even if you were in the hole for a year or two years, and I know it's not good, and you have psychological issues and things like that, I know things were terrible, but I'm telling you right now, I'm not personally in the mood to do hostage trauma porn on every news show. Call me insensitive, I don't care. I want a happy hostage. Sorry. I want a happy. I want a hostage who's ready to turn the page. I don't want a hostage who. Who's going to marinate in their misfortune in front of all of us. I'm sorry it happened. I didn't do it. But I want a happy hostage. I want a happy hostage. I want. I want. During the first. During the 42 day first phase, 33 of the remaining women, children, elderly and severely ill hostages will be released in exchange for roughly a thousand Palestinian security prisoners. Israel will partially withdraw from Gaza while helping facilitate the entry of 600 trucks of humanitarian aid into the strip each day. The second stage will see the release of the remaining living hostages and conclude with the declaration of a permanent ceasefire. The third phase will see the release of bodies still held by Hamas. And the fourth phase will be Israel nuking Gaza. That's phase four. But I'm. When the hostages come out, and I know this has been a terrible ordeal for them, and I'm not minimizing that. I'm speaking only about the optics and the. I want. I just. I don't. I need. We need to move on from this. And I know the hostages are going to come out and they're going to go on shows and they're going to talk about how terrible this has been, and I understand that, but I'm just asking, please, please, for the sake of moving on, is there any way that we can just, you know, kind of feature the hostages where the. Where they are more positive about their experiences, slightly happier to move on? There's gotta be a few hostages that say, I wasn't doing a ton anyway. There's gotta be a few hostages that go, listen, this was an interesting experience. I don't. I didn't love every part of it. This is what I want the hostages to say. This is what I want them to say. I want them to go, I didn't love every part of this. Obviously, it was something. It came out of nowhere. But it's fascinating, this whole thing, geopolitics, I think it's very interesting. I want a hostage to say something like that. I don't want them to go. And there was rape and there was. I just. I've had enough of the problems over there, seeping into my issues when I'm trying to have a lunch. I want that one hostage to go. I'm telling you right now. I was sitting in a room and they were killing someone next to me. And yes, it was tough, but this whole thing, this labyrinth of tunnels that they would kind of take us from here to there, and a lot of people were scared because they didn't know if they were going to die. But I personally found it kind of interesting. The layout of it, just. The layout of it in general is kind of interesting to me. And then I started thinking, really, about this whole thing. We're in this whole crazy world, you know, One day I'm above ground, next day I'm in a tunnel, now I'm out. And I've learned not to take things so seriously. I hope there's a hostage that comes out who says, I've learned through this whole ordeal to not take things so seriously. I used to get really angry when my wife would burn the breakfast. Now I don't care anymore. It doesn't. You know what I mean? Like, I'm just hoping we find that hostage, we got to find that hostage who's kind of easy come, easy go with it. Where you go now, tell us about your ordeal. And they go, listen, I got to be honest with you. There's a lot of people that were obviously very upset, and I understand that myself. You know, there were times when it wasn't the best, but overall, I think it was a culturally enriching experience. And I feel kind of fine about it. I kind of fine about it. You know, that's all I want. I just want someone to say, there's gonna be a lot of negativity right now, but it's not gonna come from me. It was an interesting time. I met a lot of people. I met a lot of people. Interesting people. And I never would have met those. It's like any experience. I never would have met those people if I wasn't dragged into that tunnel. I never would have met those. If I was not dragged into that tunnel. I never would have met those people. And we're lifelong friends now, by the way. It's also, you've shared an experience with people that, that no one's gonna really have again. Maybe, probably they will. But you've done something so unique. I want to remind all the hostages coming out of the tunnels, if you're okay and alive and you're fine, you've been through some. You've done something so unique and you have such a story. And I think we just got to look at it in a positive way. I don't want to. Let's not drown ourselves in self pity. I want you to say, this was a really pivotal time in my life. What about somebody who comes out, goes, I got a lot of writing done. I got a ton of writing done. And they go, really? What was it like down there? And they go, more well lit than you'd think for a tunnel. I got a lot of writing done. I got a first draft of a novel I'm really proud of. And they go, is it about the ordeal? And they go, no, no, it's young adult fiction because I. It's. I want it to sell. So it's actually a young adult. They're Jewish. They're thinking in a marketing way. They go, it's ya. Is it about the whole Hamas thing? You go, no, it's sort of like a ya thing. You know, it's magical elements, different realms, love, loss, you know, all thing. Oh, it's smart. Well, I wish them well over there. You know, the way I've always felt about it, I've always felt the same way as I do now. And that is that my, my hope, my hope has always been for this topic to stop coming up at dinner when I'm there. That's been my geopolitical ideology is that I hope that everyone shuts their mouth.
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Tim Dillon
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Tim Dillon
Everyone's moving what? Is TikTok going to be banned? Will it go away? What's happening? Biden says he won't enforce it. The Supreme Court held it up. Trump likes TikTok. Trump says a lot of young people got him elected, which is true. But the Supreme Court is saying they back the law that's requiring TikTok to be sold or banned. The Supreme Court is basically saying, I don't know. I see TikTok two ways. As a harbinger of the apocalypse. Yes. A mirror to a failing dysfunctional society. Correct. Yes. A place where people can earn money. Also true. It's a thriving economy for a lot of people. You know, I wouldn't ban it, certainly not for this reason that it's Chinese spyware. Of course it's Chinese spyware, but it's the best kind of spyware ever because, you know, they're probably watching our TikToks. They're terrified of us. That's what I would be if I was China and I watched American TikToks. I would never want to invade. I wouldn't even want to visit. It doesn't show us in the greatest light. But now people going on Red note, the Chinese app. By the way, if they ban TikTok, every young kid should just become a Maoist like CCP member and learn Mandarin. Why not? If they ban TikTok, go hard. Not only RedNote Wear Fuck Taiwan shirts. I want every young kid who's mad about this in a Fuck Taiwan shirt. I want you to go. If you want to go hard, go. Go hard. I want you to go fucking hard. Learn Mandarin and scream at your parents and scream at them in Mandarin from your room in a Fuck Taiwan shirt. Pledge your allegiance to the CCP. It's great. As TikTok band looms, hundreds of thousands of Americans casting about for new video sharing app have migrated to Zhao Hongshu, a social media platform that translates to Little Red Book, which is a nickname for the classic compendium of quotations from Chairman Mao. It has all played out like a global practical joke on the American government. Threatened with exile from TikTok over concerns of Chinese interference, its users have simply scrolled to a different Chinese app. Well, that serves people right for banning TikTok. All of our young people who are making a living on TikTok should absolutely embrace the CCP publicly. Publicly and learn Mandarin. And, and because this is. They like TikTok a lot. It's their. It's, it's, it's, it's the app of their childhood. This is the app, they grew up with it during the pandemic and they've seen some of their friends get rich on it. And maybe they themselves have made a little bit of money on it. But they see it as an economy and they see it as a place where they get their news and when they get their information. And it's a place where they're not watching mainstream news. They have no interest in that. They think it's bullshit. They're right. Doesn't mean everything on TikTok's great. Doesn't mean everything is well sourced and balanced. It means that it's a place where they can get a bunch of different perspectives all over the place. I surrendered my phone number, reported my gender and ticked off some of my interest. Baby care, calligraphy, snacks. And I absorbed a selection of the app's algorithmically selected videos. A girl in a lace veil eating an ice pop the size of head. A woman preparing dinner in the backseat of a mini car line with animal plushies. A stirring fan edit of the Luigi Mangione court appearances. This is Red Note we're talking about. This is someone's experience in Red Note. Soon I started to see videos pitched directly at me. Welcome notes created from the American TikTok user who recently arrived on Red Notes. Sure. So Red Note is the Chinese Communist CCP. They're like, you think TikTok's bad? You have no idea. And. And it proves an interesting point. Nobody is going to put their phone down. They don't. They're. They'll. They will join Al Qaeda's app. It doesn't matter who has an app, by the way, what North Korea puts out an app, they're on that. It doesn't. There is no morality when it comes to boredom. You need to scroll, you're bored. So it doesn't matter what nefarious group puts out an app. It does not. If the Assad family who just got kicked out of Syria, if Bashar Assad puts out an app, these kids are on it because they're bored. They're bored and they want to scroll. They don't care. Satan himself could put out an app. Is the algorithm is enticing to these kids. They're on the app. They don't care. They're going in. Red Note is not even the least of it. As soon as, like a terrorist group finds a way to entertain Americans, it's over. It's over. Truly. If a terrorist group found that Al Qaeda's wasting their time with cells in America trying to pull off attacks. If you listen to Sean Ryan show every day it's somebody else talking about Al Qaeda. But if they're wasting their time, what they should start doing is dances in their backyard to get American teenagers on their side. It'll happen very quickly, it'll happen overnight. All you have to do is figure out an app that's entertaining. Cuz America wants to be entertained. I want to be entertained. We all just want to be entertained. So entertain us to death. Kill us through entertainment. That's what you have to do. That's what the Chinese probably realize. They're like, we need an app to entertain these people. That's going to win them over. And it does. It will. So if you're a terrorist group and you want to make a mark, you really have to figure out a social strategy. You have to figure out a social media strategy to entice American youth. Now this is a woman or someone of other gender who's talking about her experience on the RedNote app. Let's listen to her. Let's see what she's got to say about RedNote, the Chinese app.
Guest/Caller
I joined RedNote. You can only do 15 characters, so my handle is pretty sweet Acres. And it's missing an E right there. Like, I don't know, it's total culture shock. There is a lot that's not in English, but I'm here for it. I decided to start with the goat run club video, the very first one that went viral so far. It's like gotten a few likes, you.
Tim Dillon
Know what I mean?
Guest/Caller
But the funniest thing, and I don't know if this is like a translation issue or if they literally think that these are sheep, but I've gotten a ton of comments that are like, oh my God, the sheep are so cute. Like the lambs, the sheep, they're goats. And it said they're goats. Sheep. Tiny, tiny.
Tim Dillon
So many sheep. Baby run. So is this Chinese people commenting? Yes, directly. So the Chinese people aren't sure what a sheep or a lamb, it doesn't matter. They're just, they're. It's. Maybe the language isn't. Maybe it's just. It doesn't translate in the way that we think it does. Well, this is a great. This is fun because now it's China and America getting together and that's kind of interesting. I watched a lot of those Chinese videos. I like them, the Chinese rappers. Those Chinese rappers and they rap and they make food and some of the food looks good, some of it's a little frightening, but it's cool. If you ever see those, like, Chinese rappers, it's like a family of older. They do music, and then they're also cooking, like, crazy food. And they're all. I think they are big on TikTok. I watch all that creepy Chinese food stuff where it's, like, really creepy Chinese food, like a really. Like a really creepy Chinese dish that they make. Like, you'll see, like, a woman with a machete just hacking up a jellyfish and then eating it with her bare hands. I watch that. I watch that, and I don't care who made it. I don't care if North Korea made it. It's interesting to watch. It's interesting content to watch. You watch something, like, really creepy on TikTok. That's what people want, and that's why we're all powerless. Yeah. The algorithm is gonna win, so there's. There's nothing you can really do about it. There's nothing you can really do about it. The mukbang, all of these things. People started with, like, Trish Paytas started with mukbangs. Trish Paytas is now in, like, a world tour. Obviously, she's very talented, but, like, you know, you can get people. You can entice people any way you want. You got to get them in, you got to gross them out. You got to, like, captivate them in a certain way, and then you have them, and it's not good. I'm not saying this is, like, quality. I'm just saying you're. You're kind of paralyzed in front of your phone. It's. It's. Why the Costco family. Bao, the demon. The demon baal, except the Rizzler, who I don't think knows the Rizzler's unaware that he's surrounded by demons. You can tell. You can see the Rizzler sometimes kind of quizzically. Look at them, because they're so obviously demonic. The rest of the family, Big justice aj, the sister, and the wife are obviously the representation of an entity, a biblical entity called BAAL that's actually evil, and that's why they do the incantations. I've explained it a million times. But the Rizzler, I don't believe is part of baal. I think because the Rizzler is not in their family. The Rizzler was picked to. To kind of market ball and the evil family to the public. So every now and then, the Rizzler will do something like, human, like, cry, right? He'll be upset. We never see AJ And Big justice show human emotion because that, that's not. Because Ball has a tough time with that. The demon, the Rizzler comes in and he gets upset and every now and then he'll look at the rest of the family and he'll go, oh, they're something's. I'm not like them. I think the Rizzler goes, there's something in them that's not in me. And that, my friend, the Rizzler is. BAAL is the biblical entity, the demon baal. But when this is opened, by the way, the Pandora's box that this has opened and the reason that I talk about these algorithms and what they're pushing, people have called it brain rot. People have called it, you know, there's all kinds of names for it, but what it is is absolutely meaningless, pointless garbage that you are being fed that is being mass marketed to you and your children. That doesn't make you smarter or sharper. And it doesn't mean that there's not good stuff on there. It doesn't mean that there's not really important and impactful stuff. It means that a lot of what is going on right now. Like for example, there are so many people reviewing food and it's not even from an educated. They're not educated, they're not chefs. They don't know anything about food. They don't know anything about anything. And they just go to a place and they eat the food and they go, this was good. That's it. They go to a place, they just sit there, they go, I'm trying raising Cane's new fucking or Dave's hot chickens. New fucking hot chicken fries. And they got the fries and then the hot chicken and this sauce and this and that. And then it's just somebody eats it and goes, that goes hard. That's the video. Someone eating French fries. They go, that goes hard. And that's it. And then all these companies are starting to sponsor these people and pay the money to go to these places and eat this stuff or try this stuff. So the future of entertainment in America is spawncon only. The future of entertainment in this country is companies paying people. Teenagers, adults, whatever demo they're trying to get, it's paying people to go and try their products and review them positively on apps like TikTok or YouTube, Instagram, whatever it is. They're basically, it just, you just, you just, they just, yo, that slaps yo, that goes hard. And it's like sometimes it's like a teenage kid and then sometimes like a full on adult, like an adult who just pulls up outside of a Sonic and goes, I'm going to try the Sonic, whatever. And then they're sitting in a car and then they. They're eating the Sonic. And. And I don't know. It's like, I bet in the beginning of this, Sonic was like, this is disgusting. This is like a gross person pulling up, shoving food in their face. We don't want this. We don't want it. And then I bet after a while, they came in and ran the numbers and they go, no, no, no, no, no. This is real good. And the executives were like, wait a minute. Are you sure? This thing's a monster? And they go, yeah, yeah, yeah. But this. Millions of people are watching this morbidly obese person who cannot fit in their car eat and then make the sounds like that weird that, like. And the executives of Sonic are probably. Wait a minute. This is gross.
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Tim Dillon
And they go, no, no, no, no, no. It's actually great. It's actually motivate thousands, tens of thousands, hundreds of thousands, millions of people are watching people eat this shit, and they're going to come get it. And the CEOs are like, wait a minute. They're not repulsed by this. They don't turn this off immediately. No, no, no. This is great.
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Tim Dillon
Had to be a moment when Costco was like, well, we don't love this. What is this? Like, these suits at Costco had to go, hold on. What is this? Is this going to turn people off? And then eventually they go, oh, they surrendered. They go, no, no, no. This is actually great.
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Tim Dillon
This is resonating with the. Because the. The suits are probably. They're on, like, a little bit of a lag about how cretinized the public is. They don't know yet how cretinized the public has become. So they're probably like, wait a minute. Like, it's shocking. Even to them. Even to them. And they have the worst opinions of the American people in advertising, have the lowest opinions of the American public. And even to them, they're probably shocked that some of this is working. They're like, really? So they like this. They like the dancing family who just screams about the cookie. They like it. It does. Well, the guy, they're playing golf in Scottsdale. They go, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it's actually great. The guy. Wait, wait, hold on. Bob, Bob, that guy I showed you who screams about the cookie and the chicken pig. No, they actually like it. No way. They love it. It's. It. Numbers are up. People are going in and they're getting these cookies. They're taking photos with them. That guy is getting like. It's got to shock the executives at some of these companies that this content actually drives the numbers. So now that they know it does, get ready, get ready for the onslaught, because now they know. The executives of these companies know the. The word we're going for is cringe. It's not like. It's like, it's gotta. Like, it's gotta. People have to be puzzled at first. Like, it's about to get real weird out. Not that it's not weird around. I don't even. The drones might be a campaign for Arby's. We don't know what's. The drones could be Arby's. They might go, well, yeah, those drones, they're over the military Arby's. Like, it's gonna get so weird and so crazy with the way that companies are gonna choose to advertise stuff to you because they know that you have to initially be repulsed. You have to initially be repulsed. Like, if I was kfc, I'd go take a chicken tender and leave it by the scene of a murder. That's what I would say. I'd say, wait for someone to get murdered and then take a tender and leave it by the scene of the murder. So we can get involved. Just take him. Be careful, because we don't want them thinking you murdered the pr. But just roll a tender by a body and take a photo and then we become part of the news. Like the way that companies are going to market stuff now, like, when I was growing up, they never had any respect for you. It was always like they played on your emotions. Like the Budweiser Clydesdales would like, take a knee after nine, 11, you know, and it'd be like, from one American icon to another. Or the frogs. Budweiser. You know what I mean? Jake from State Farm. Any of that stuff. Any of these flow from progressive. Any of these characters that you got used to, okay? These campaigns were built around these wacky, zany characters. Now they're building marketing campaigns around psychologically unstable people. That Costco guy will take his family Benoit style. He will take them out. Somehow it will end. That Costco market campaign will end worse than Fogle. Somehow it'll end worse than Jared Fogle, the pedophile who lost a bunch of weight eating the BMT or whatever he ate. I'm telling you right now, they're now just reaching out to psychologically unstable people who consume their products day in and day out on camera. And these companies are going, we should get in bed with this psycho. We should get in bed with this nut job who's drinking syrup. There's going to be a guy in the IHOP parking lot who drinks syrup out of the things, okay? And IHOP's gonna go, we should get in bed with that guy. We should. We should do stuff with him. Why not? And you see what happens. You see it happens with Jared Fogel. Like, it's never a great idea to get in bed with. With someone who claims they love your product so much that it's the only thing going on in their life. It's not a good idea. It's not a good idea. But this is coming. This is coming. So we don't know the next phase of this marketing, because I watch. And that's a lot of what you see on TikTok. A lot of what you see on TikTok is, is. Is companies that have figured out how to Start brand partnerships with people, okay? And they don't care who it is. They don't care who. They'll, they'll start it with Bibi Netanyahu will, will, will literally light a bunch of babies on fire and then eat a crumble cookie. They don't give a shit. They will. BB Netanyahu will be reviewing crumble cookies within four months and beeping that, no, this is crumble cookie Monday. And he'll just have the crumble cookie with a little cutter and they'll eat it and he'll go, pancake. I like it. Like it's gonna get to that point. They don't really care. Doesn't matter to them. It doesn't matter because these companies go. The people are monsters. We gotta find monsters to market to the people. It's no longer like Double Min Kong with like the hot chicks. We're no longer going that route. We're no longer getting a model. We're not, we're no longer doing any of that. We're getting someone that looks like the people. We're getting a monster. We're going to get a monster to market the shit because that's who it's for. So we're going to get a monster to do it. We're going to find, we're going to, we're going to hand select one of these demons from the Internet and we're going to stuff their pockets with money and we're going to go, go fill up a tub in your house with and cane sauce and bathe in it. You're a monster. And that's what we want. We want you. You're a monster. Okay? The old school ones like McDonald's and Burger King, they're not quite getting it yet. You can still see they're trying to do like that old school shit and it's not really working. They're still trying to do. They're like at McDonald's or. But they need, they need to find a monster. Like if you're a fast food company and your sales are low, if they're dipping, you got to get a monster. Like Wendy's has got to get a monster. What about a guy on death row whose meal is Wendy's? It's his last meal. And eats Wendy's every day until they put him to death for the murder. He murdered two sisters. He murdered and raped two sisters and lit their bodies on fire in the woods in rural Tennessee. And he's going to the chair or whatever they have. He's going to lethal injection. But He's. He's going to eat Wendy's the night before. That's what we're. You know, he's going to eat a big bacon Classic before they strap him to the gurney. And he's got to. And they're going to give his family money, but he's got to talk about Wendy's. When he's up there strapped to the. Getting ready to get injected, he's got to keep talking about Wendy's even past the first shot. The first shots to numb you, and then the second shots, which shuts down your organs even. They're going to tell them. Even though they're giving you the first shot, you got to keep talking about Wendy's. Keep talking about Wendy's. And then the second shot, obviously you're not able to. They got to. They got to embrace that. You got to get a. You got to get a monster now or a family of monsters to market your product to the American people. And if you're not doing that, you're crazy. The inauguration is coming up. Donald Trump will be inaugurated. The FBI is warned of a nonspecific terror threat. There's going to be a lot of military. I'm not gonna go. I thought about going. I was invited and I appreciate that. I was invited vip, and that's very nice of them, but I've got a birthday coming up. I got shows, I got things, I.
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Tim Dillon
We just. We had fires in la. My house is burned down. I lost my home. We're gonna have a gofundme up for me very soon. It's tough to see everything you've built. A dream that I work so hard for. Go up and smoke, literally, literally. And we're gonna have a gofundme up for me to just get me even as Vegas. Matt would say, get even or get even worse. I just want to get even. Just make me whole. Just make me whole. Taxes, insurance, to mortgage, everything together. We need about 4 million to make me whole. Hopefully, I'll run into a few friendly faces. U.S. capitol riders return to D.C. to celebrate Trump's inauguration. If you are a capital rioter, is this not the greatest day of your life? If you are a capital rioter, this is like the day that you didn't see coming. But it is, it is. This is everything. Heaven, if it's real, will pale in comparison for these. You got to be at least happy for that. There is no greater joy. There is no greater happiness. Members of the J6 community who hold nightly vigils at the D.C. jail that houses them have already secured official inauguration tickets, according to multiple sources, and are tapping allies in Trump's orbit to solicit additional tickets. You're a J6 or you're getting out of jail and then your boys coming in. I mean, it is, just think of it, they're just so, it's, it just makes them happy. I'm asking you to withhold judgment on their act for a moment. I'm saying, have you ever seen someone happy? They're going to be happy. I mean, all smiles, all ear to ear smiles from the J6 crew just walking in there. They're kind of renegades. They should have leather jackets with, like, J6, like, in the back of the leather jackets. I'm telling you, it's, this is going to be the happiest day of their life. There is not the birth of their children. Nothing will compare to that. There will be nothing on their deathbed. When someone asks them what really did it for you on this planet, they're going to go, you're going to, you're going to, you're going to laugh. But Trump's second inauguration, I got right out of jail and I was back out in D.C. while he gets inaugurated. I'm hoping that someone doesn't do something. FBI is saying a nonspecific threat, but they're, you know, they're referencing, like, New Orleans agencies warn of Trump's inauguration being a target for violent extremists. The FBI is like, we're very concerned with these violent extremists. And by that we mean people on our payroll, our official payroll, all those violent extremists that we have interviewed 30 times. And no, we're very concerned with these violent extremists that we keep having lunch with. We keep recruiting them as informants. And. But they're violent and they're extreme and we're very concerned with them. We don't like them, they're bad, and they present a grave public danger, which is why we've tried to, you know, try to get them to work for us. And do. And do often. And do. The threat assessment compiled by the FBI, Secret Service, Capitol Police and other agencies highlights various nightmare scenarios. Oh, including bomb hoaxes, swatting calls, drone flights and vehicle ramming attacks. Foreign terrorist, domestic extremists and lone wolves are considered potential perpetrators. The assessment also notes that Iran has long sought revenge against Trump for the killing of General Soleimani. With 700,000 users on Telegram threatening to assassinate him the day after Election Day, no one is Taking anything on telegram seriously, I think that they're going to have a ton of security. I know for a fact they'll have a ton of security. We hope, of course, pray whatever, that there's nothing happens and that everything is okay. But we, you know, there's going to be a lot of people out there. This is not the time necessarily when something is going to pop off. I tend to think in terms of things like this, that it'll be a day you don't expect, like 9 11, Tuesday after, you know, morning, 9 11. Nobody. Nobody thought. I don't know if they do things on. On the day of the inauguration, I think it's going to be very difficult. That's another reason me getting in and out. It's annoying being herded from this one to that one here to their checkpoints and this and that. It's like, you know, it would have been cool to see as an event. I get it. I hate conventions. I feel like it's going to be like a convention. It's gonna be freezing. They're moving it inside. I thought it was gonna be like more of a. Like. Like a where. It would be like, me and Trump advance, and then they would have, like, a map of the world, and I would point to which countries I wanted to attack and they would go, we'll take it under advice. Like, it's not like that. It's more of. It's more of an impersonal thing. I thought it was gonna be like, I get a few minutes with Trump to just go, here's a few people I think you should look at. That's what I thought it was why I wanted to go. Here's a few members of my family to keep an eye on. That's what I thought it was gonna be. That was my. That was my hope that I was going to be able to. I have a list of people that I think should be watched. And I thought that the inauguration, I was going to be able to give that list to a member of the administration to pass along to Tulsi or someone. That's why I was going. Apparently. It's like a. It's a huge ball that's kind of impersonal. I won't really be. I won't really have that kind of access, but I want. I have a list of people for their own good. I want them to be watched by our new government, members of my own family and some of my friends, and I want them to be watched. So that's what I thought it was going to be like, come on in, here's my list. That's what I thought it was going to be. Trump was informed about the potential harm that the cold temperatures could have on law enforcement horses. Interesting because the horses get freezing there. They got a lot of horses out there in case the crowd gets unruly. It's like 6th street in Austin.
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Tim Dillon
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Tim Dillon
Rate shoppers, you need to get out.
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Tim Dillon
Terry from Ohio.
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Tim Dillon
6Th street in Austin, Texas which Austin by the way looks like California after the fires. I was like googling pictures of Austin and it just Looks like California that fires had already ripped through. It's just. It's just, it's already. The deforestation is over. Let's talk a little bit about the scumbags trying to rob people in California right now. Get up the midgets from selling Sunset and whatever scam they're running, get them up on Instagram. They're running a scam. All these realtors are running a scam. And this is the way this came. They're like, use us for free, no commission. They're like, and by the way, if you pay a commission, we'll give it back to you. It's like, well, why would I pay one? You're either giving it for free or not. I also know people, where people are inquiring. People are calling up residents of Altadena right now and saying, we will buy your land for 700 grand. And then it's blackrock. Blackrock, these demons from hell. Larry Fink comes out and goes, it's going to take 10 years to rebuild. Scaring the shit out of everybody. It's going to take a while. But he comes out and says it. His company BlackRock is out there calling people whose. It's still warm. These smoldering ashes are still going. And BlackRock is like, hey, can we. Hi, I'd like to buy some land. And they never say it's blackrock, but then when you start doing all the like, verification of funds. My friends are realtors in L. A. When they start doing the verification of funds and they start looking into it, it's blackrock is calling and they're like, hi. Hi.
Guest/Caller
Hi.
Tim Dillon
I would just like to like, buy some land in the Palisades and maybe there's some people that might need some help and people might just, you know, they might value having some cash on hand. So we'd like to come in and you go, oh, that's okay. Well, yeah, let's, let's. Do you have any documentation? They start providing the documentation and it all goes back to fucking. Blackrock is trying to buy the land in Altadena and the Palisade, all these places, because people are desperate and they go, we'll just buy the land. Well, buy the land from you get the midges from selling Sunset, get their Instagram up, find out what scam they're running, because they are running a scam. I believe they did it. And I. And they. And if they sue me for defamation, remember, this is for entertainment only. I personally believe the brothers from selling Sunset started this fire. I'm going to say it right now. I don't need evidence when I feel so strongly, by the way. I don't need evidence when I feel so strongly about something. The two little guys from Selling Sunset started this fire, and I don't know why, for season five, but they're offering. They're offering some scam deal to people who've lost their homes. They're offering, like, some, like, strange game where they're like, we want to talk about the. This is how you know you're getting scammed. When people come online and do this, they go, we want to talk about the real scam. There's scammers out there taking advantage of people, and we want to bring that to your attention. And the reason they're doing that, they're doing that is because they're saying, we really want to scam you. We found out that there's people out there that are not us scamming you. And if that's the case, it's a big problem for us. So we want to get ahead of this. We want to come out and warn you about people not associated with our scam trying to scam you. By the way, when a fire like this breaks out, if you're a scammer, if you're a con, if you want to, this is your moment. This is the time. Here we go. Let's. Let's let go. And they've got NBC News. They got everyone involved. Let's watch these criminals. Let's watch these criminals. The guys should say, can you imagine? Your house has been lost and in your window, pops in the little guy. From selling Sunset to selling Sunset.
News Anchor
Jason, it's good to see you. Thank you. Wish it was under better circumstances. Something that's striking. Right. And I think people don't really even understand it.
Tim Dillon
Let's stop this for a minute. I'm a little sick of capitalism. I really gotta be honest. I'm starting to go red. Why during the fire, is the realtor from Selling Sunset on the news? Why in God's name, during an active fire, is the real estate agent from Selling Sunset an expert? They're bringing it. Why are we even thinking about that? Why are we even thinking about what's going to happen with the real estate bar? It's on fire. It's literally on fire. Fire. Why would we bring in an expert? All right, let's see it.
News Anchor
California.
Tim Dillon
I'm not.
News Anchor
I'm a Midwest kid. That what burned in the areas affected here. These are some of the fanciest places in all of Los Angeles, right?
Tim Dillon
Stop this for a second. Stop that. Why in God's name is this an angle? Why in God's do you want everyone the world over to hate us? Can you imagine a less sympathetic angle than someone who starts the interview by going, now, Jason, these houses were some of the fanciest, glitziest, glamorous houses that have ever been constructed. Am I right?
Real Estate Agent
Yeah. I mean, I'd say most of the Pacific Palisades is gone, you know, probably 75% of it. And I'd say the average home there was maybe 3 to 4 million. Certainly homes in the.
Tim Dillon
No, it's higher.
Real Estate Agent
5 to 10 million dollar range. I've sold. I've had clients and friends calling me all day. Probably 40 to 50 calls, actually, from people that lost homes. Several of them are former clients who. I sold homes to them in the Palisades in, you know, in the five to 10 months.
Tim Dillon
How is this helping people? Shouldn't they be doing like, evacuation notice? Here's how to get out. Here's where you should go. Here's the church that has the water for you. Why is this lunatic talking about 50 homes he sold? Why are people going, by the way? The church has water. It has water. Go and drink. We have water at the church. Why are they doing that? Why is this psychopath going, I sold 50 homes in that neighborhood and our.
Real Estate Agent
Range, and they're all gone.
Tim Dillon
Wow.
News Anchor
What happens to these folks? There's a finite number of homes you're talking about, you know, a couple of thousand, six thousand maybe, homes that will have been destroyed by this many more damaged. Where do all those folks go?
Real Estate Agent
That's such a good question right now. Hotels, you know, you can't find a. A hotel room. Forget about Los Angeles. You can't even find hotel rooms in Newport Beach, Orange County, I mean, all the way down to right now. So they're waiting in hotels until they can figure out with their insurance how much money they have to find a house. But we do have some clients that we are working with now to try to find property. And it is. You wouldn't believe the stories. I mean, we had a client today, we showed him a house for $13,000 a month. What was. Which is the. That was the asking price on the MLS. And we offered 20,000amonth upfront for six months. And the landlord counted us at 23,000, $10,000 more than he was even asking. You'll see lines of 15, 20 people just waiting to get in to these properties.
News Anchor
There's just that sort of sounds like gouging almost. I don't know.
Tim Dillon
It's actually illegal. It is.
Real Estate Agent
That's why I'm mentioning it, because it should be exposed what some of these landlords are doing.
News Anchor
Yeah, it feels wrong, really. You're taking advantage of people at that point. Help us understand what's going to happen here.
Tim Dillon
Right.
News Anchor
I mean, you think about the Pacific Coast Highway, Malibu. These are sort of some of the more iconic places in the country. That's why they make a Netflix show about selling these homes that you're a star on.
Tim Dillon
What is going on?
News Anchor
Is this stuff going to be. Get rebuilt, you think?
Real Estate Agent
Yes, I. I think so. It's going to take a long time. I think the city needs to do things like, for example, maybe exempt the mansion tax, you know, for developers.
Tim Dillon
I agree. Well, what about for me? How about for me? I mean, I sold my home, but still, if I want to buy another.
Real Estate Agent
One, to be encouraged to come in and build here, we're going to need to expedite, you know, the permitting process. And we're going to need California to increase the Fair Plan. With the Fair Plan is the California fire insurance.
Tim Dillon
That's right.
Real Estate Agent
Through the state.
Tim Dillon
That's right.
Real Estate Agent
Because right. Right now there are no other options. And the Fair Plan only goes up to 3 million. So most of these homes are burnt down. Weren't able to be insured through the California Fair Plan. We have to increase that.
News Anchor
Stunning. Well, there's a lot.
Tim Dillon
He's like. And we also have to get California to get all the laws off the books that stop me from stealing your home. Get those laws off the books that stop me when I want to steal your home. It's not good. It's counterproductive. If I steal your house fair and square, it's my house. So why would there be a law penalizing me saying I go to jail when I've stolen your house? If you're sitting in an ash heap and I steal it because I come to you and have you sign a couple of documents while you're crying, it's mine. Finders keepers, losers weepers.
Real Estate Agent
A lot of friends and clients reaching out.
Tim Dillon
Yes.
Real Estate Agent
Because they lost their. Their homes over the last couple of days and they need.
Tim Dillon
Why is yours fine?
Real Estate Agent
They need help with places to live. You and your brother placed.
Tim Dillon
And that's right.
Real Estate Agent
As real estate agents, we obviously have an obligation. Help them find a place, even when it's going to be difficult with thousands of people looking for places and not nearly as many houses available. Yes, but the Oppenheim Group is Offering to represent anybody for free. Or we will credit you back any commission paid.
Tim Dillon
What do you mean by that?
Real Estate Agent
If you've lost your house and you're now displaced, we will help you find a place or do our our best to help you find a place to rent. Real estate agents need to come together and work hard.
Tim Dillon
That's who needs to come together. Real estate agents. Good.
Real Estate Agent
This is our time to. It's our time to raise back so.
Tim Dillon
And rob and steal.
Real Estate Agent
Reach out to us. Reach outgroup.com.
Tim Dillon
Take your burn hand and get on the phone.
Real Estate Agent
Everyone stay safe.
Tim Dillon
Grab the phone with your charred hand and call me and my dirtbag team of scumbags. Get your charred claw, pull out your cell phone, call me and my brother and we'll come there and rob you. You want to get robbed? Take your phone out of your pocket and come get robbed. We'll put you in a house for 20 grand a month. It shouldn't rent for nine. We'll put you in a dump. We will put you and your family in a shit box for 30,000amonth. Call me and my brother with your charred hand and I will put you in a shitbox of a house for 40,000amonth. You wanna talk about a shitbox? We'll put you in a sh. We'll put you in a house you wanna burn down. We'll put you in a house every day you pray it burns. Cuz me and my brother, who may or may not have started the fires, are here to rob you. We're here to take. You're in a desperate situation. Pick up the phone. This is where we come in. You're desperate. You have smoke inhalation poisoning. You're not really thinking. You're dizzy, you're vomiting, you have headaches. Call me and my brother. We'll get it done. We specialize in representing people with headaches from inhaling smoke. That's what we do. We specialize in. We specialize in the relocation of families who've lost properties and aren't thinking clearly. I love, I love the angle of the news being like, so these are. These are really nice homes. Where do. Where do these people go? Where do the rich go? These are beautiful. That's why there's TV shows on Netflix about them. That's why there's TV shows about them. Where are they? Where are these people gonna go? Where are they gonna go? I don't know. Somewhere else. There'll be a lot of those people will be okay. He's like, the average home's 3 to 4 million.
Sponsor/Ad Voice
That's a lie.
Tim Dillon
The average home in the Palisades is more than that. And averages are fake anyway because the average. They'll include like an apartment complex that's not in the Palisades of, like, shitty condos. Like, averages are not real. The reality is everyone who lives in the Palisades, and I'm not shitting on them, and I hope they're okay. And I'm not saying that there's anything morally wrong with having money or nice things.
Sponsor/Ad Voice
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Tim Dillon
It's fine. But it is hilarious to me that now this guy, like seeing these real estate agents just come out there and go, listen. Now, by the way, you don't need to advertise. They're going to call. They're going to call. Why are you advertising? Don't you have three television shows, you bum? Don't you have three TV show. How about you come out and say, we're going to donate some money, we're going to do fundraisers, things like that. They know to call you, yet you've shamelessly put your face everywhere. All over the town. They know to call. Why do you need to run a commercial while people are burning alive? You don't need to do it. They're going to call. Your fucking dumb face is on every billboard and every show about real estate involves you. You don't need to do a commercial about how you're going to help these people. They will call you. The people that need to will call you. And by the way, I hope his phone is flooded with really poor people. Everyone should call him. That has nothing.
Caller
Hello. I see Jason. He's from Oppenheim. My budget 700. I live in shed in Altadena. The shed burned down. I have nothing. Will you and your brother help me? I live in shed. He burn. Everybody burn. I smell the skin burn of the man, Jose. He used to hit me every now and then, but he still good man. He burn alive. Will you and your brother find me a room to live? I want to live in a room. No more shed room.
Tim Dillon
Tim. Dilloncomedy.com for all the dates coming up. We're editing the special should be coming out soon. We appreciate everybody. We love you. We thank you and we believe it's our greatest days are ahead of us. We always do, we always have. And we hope for a safe inauguration. We hope that everybody is thriving. We hope that Israel and Gaza. Guys, guys. There's so much more that unites us than divides. We need some of that energy over there, some basic Bitch white energy over there. So I'm like, we have so much more that unites us and divides us. And it's like we're all the same people. Like, we just, you know, we need a little bit of that. My. We need the, you know, Frozen. What about a Disney musical about Israel and palate? We need something like that. We need to get everybody going. We need a concert. We need a concert. We need Jelly Roll to go over there. And I've said it before, I'll say it again. We just need a concert. You know, we're going to get one for the fires, but we need a concert for Gaza and Israel and for both, you know, it would be good. You see Jelly Roll coming out of the tunnel, and it's no longer a tunnel of sadness. It's actually a tunnel of rock. Rap is rap. Rock, rock, rap. My point is that it's a tunnel of southwestern. You know, see Jelly Roll coming out of the tunnel, out of the Hamas tunnel. You know, Ladies and gentlemen, Jelly Roll, he walks out of the Hamas tunnel. And everybody's getting into it. All the little Palestinian kids and the Israeli. Everybody's getting into it. Can't. We can't. Are we. Can we do that? Can we bring healing back with pop culture? You know what I mean? Can we do that? Can we get to Taylor Swift over there, show them what banal mediocrity is? You too. You too can do this. Nothing. Whatever she does. Hey, can't she do a song? Can you imagine this? Is there any more powerful. It's the ruins of God. Like a ruins. Taylor Swift is standing there, red boots and a guitar, and she starts to play the guitar. And then two people from Gaza, maybe. Maybe because they're going to be amputees. I'm going to prepare everyone for this. It's not going to be. It's not gonna be nice. But again, I didn't do it. But they're dancing kind of beautifully with the one arm or the one leg, like they're amputees, but. And Taylor's playing the guitar and she's.
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You know, it's a cruel summer.
Tim Dillon
And the people from Gaza go, you have no idea. Wouldn't that be because it's topical? She goes, it's a cruel summer. And they're all nodding like, whoa, boy. And there's amputees and they're dancing. And then we cut to Jelly Roll and he comes right out of the Hamas tunnel, and it's. And it's Jelly Roll and it's nuts. We got t. Swift singing in the ruins with the, with the, you know, the stumps and the amputees and they're dancing and Jelly Roll comes out of the Hummel. Well, now it's crazy because it's a song and Jelly Rolls doing the rap part of it. And then Taylor Swift's on the guitar and then Billie Eilish is there and she's very sad and quiet and. And they do a close up and she's by a mass grave. Billie Eilish is sitting in the middle of a mass grave. And she just goes, halloo, mama, mama. And it's Billie Eilish. And you go, and you go, what are you watching in there? And you go, Billie Eilish is performing in a mass Palestinian grave. It's beautiful. And we have this moment. We have this moment of Jelly Roll coming out of a Hamas tunnel. We have Taylor Swift in the ruins. We have Billie Eilish singing in a mass grave. Sabrina Carpenter in. In the gear, in the Islamic thing, because she's a little too, you know what I mean? A little too Western for that part. But she's covered respectfully and she's doing her thing. Can't we do it? Can't we bring the fuck if we can't do it, who's gonna do it? Who's gonna do it? It's my hope. It's my hope. And then I hope and then I hope and this will happen. And I swear to God, don't think I'm lying. There will be a moment on CNN when they go. And now, after the ceasefire has finally been ratified, let's talk about the rebuilding of Gaza. And to do that, we're bringing on Jason and Brett Oppenheim from the Oppenheim Group and the show selling Sunset.
Podcast Summary: The Tim Dillon Show
Episode: 427 - Ceasefire Cheat Day & Realtors in LA
Release Date: January 18, 2025
Host: Tim Dillon
Description: Tim Dillon, a comedian and tour guide, offers an apocalyptic tour from his Los Angeles porch, sharing his unique perspectives on current events each week.
Tim Dillon opens the episode with a discussion about the recently announced ceasefire between Israel and Hamas. He expresses a mix of skepticism and dark humor regarding the effectiveness and sincerity of the ceasefire.
Optimism and Skepticism:
"I am pumped about the ceasefire between Israel and Hamas. It's a ceasefire, baby." ([00:30])
Irony of Early Violence:
Tim highlights the tragic irony where individuals celebrating the ceasefire were killed before its official start.
"It's like a ceasefire, but tonight we dine in hell." ([04:50])
Analogy to Diets:
He uses an analogy comparing the ceasefire to starting a diet on Monday, emphasizing the abruptness and inconsistency in implementation.
"Israel is starting a strict ketogenic, no carbs, killing Palestinian babies at all for any reason on Sunday." ([05:10])
Casualties and Impact:
Delving into the grim statistics, Tim compares the death tolls, highlighting the disproportionate impact on civilians in Gaza.
"In Gaza, they say 46,707 people have been killed... Israel killed about 1139." ([12:15])
Residual Tensions:
Expressing doubt about the lasting peace, Tim predicts ongoing animosity between the two groups despite the ceasefire.
"I don't believe this is the end of the problems between these two. There's going to be some residual bad blood." ([15:00])
Tim shifts focus to the issue of hostages caught in the conflict, critiquing how their experiences are portrayed in the media.
Desire for Positive Narratives:
He humorously yet poignantly wishes for hostages to emerge without trauma, avoiding exploitative media coverage.
"I want a happy hostage who's ready to turn the page. I don't want a hostage who marinates in their misfortune." ([17:58])
Phases of Ceasefire Deal:
Tim outlines the proposed phases for the ceasefire and hostage release, questioning the practicality and humanity of such plans.
"The first phase will see the release of 33 hostages in exchange for Palestinian security prisoners... The fourth phase will see Israel nuking Gaza." ([18:20])
Critique of Negotiations:
He criticizes the negotiations as insufficient, suggesting that no lasting solution is imminent.
"There's a lot more that unites us than divides, but we're stuck in this cycle of violence." ([24:50])
The conversation transitions to the potential banning of TikTok in the United States, where Tim provides a satirical take on the implications.
Supreme Court Involvement:
Tim discusses the Supreme Court's indecision on TikTok's future, mocking the uncertainty and political maneuvering behind the scenes.
"The Supreme Court is basically saying, I don't know." ([17:58])
Satirical Call to Action:
He jests about young people embracing CCP ideologies if TikTok is banned, highlighting the absurdity he perceives in such measures.
"If they ban TikTok, every young kid should just become a Maoist like CCP member and learn Mandarin." ([20:30])
RedNote App Comparison:
Introducing RedNote, a Chinese app, Tim mocks the seamless migration of TikTok users to other platforms, emphasizing the addictive nature of social media algorithms.
"RedNote is the Chinese Communist CCP. They're like, you think TikTok's bad? You have no idea." ([24:50])
Algorithms and Brain Rot:
He critiques how algorithms feed users meaningless content, leading to societal distraction and "brain rot."
"What is absolutely meaningless, pointless garbage that you are being fed that is being mass marketed to you and your children." ([30:10])
A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to Tim's scathing critique of realtors in Los Angeles who exploit natural disasters to scam displaced residents.
Exploitation by Realtors:
He targets the real estate agents from the popular show "Selling Sunset," accusing them of capitalizing on the California fires to drain money from those affected.
"These realtors are running a scam. I believe the brothers from Selling Sunset started this fire." ([50:00])
Mock Interview with a Realtor:
Tim satirizes a fictional interaction with a "Real Estate Agent" from the Oppenheim Group, highlighting the absurdity and unethical nature of their services during a disaster.
"Why are you advertising? Don't you have three television shows? Don't you have three shows?" ([56:03])
Illegal Practices and Gouging:
He points out the illegal price gouging by realtors, who charge exorbitant rents during the crisis, further burdening displaced individuals.
"We're offering to represent anybody for free. Or we will credit you back any commission paid." ([60:02])
Endorsement Turned Mockery:
Initially, the real estate agents promote their services as benevolent, but Tim twists their pitch into a mocking endorsement of taking advantage of desperate people.
"We specialize in the relocation of families who've lost properties and aren't thinking clearly." ([62:49])
Guest Caller Interaction:
A caller seeking help exposes the dire situation, allowing Tim to further highlight the unethical practices of realtors.
"Hi. I see Jason. He's from Oppenheim. My budget 700. I live in shed in Altadena." ([66:10])
In his closing remarks, Tim attempts to blend hope for resolution in global conflicts with his signature dark humor, albeit through a satirical lens.
Hope for Unity Through Pop Culture:
He fantasizes about bringing international healing through concerts featuring pop stars like Taylor Swift and Jelly Roll, absurdly merging entertainment with geopolitical resolution.
"Can we bring healing back with pop culture? Can we do that?" ([68:15])
Final Thoughts on Media and Society:
Tim wraps up by reflecting on the state of media and societal distractions, maintaining his critical stance.
"We have so much more that unites us than divides us. We just need a little bit of that energy over there." ([69:43])
Conclusion:
In this episode, Tim Dillon navigates through complex and sensitive topics with his characteristic blend of humor and satire. From scrutinizing international conflicts and media portrayals to condemning exploitative real estate practices amidst natural disasters, Tim offers a provocative commentary designed to challenge listeners’ perceptions and provoke thought.