“We pray after”

Summary

Podcast Summary: "We Pray After" – The Tony Kornheiser Show (August 12, 2025)

Hosted by Tony Kornheiser, Tim Kirkjian, and Pat Forde

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Introduction

In the episode titled “We Pray After,” released on August 12, 2025, Tony Kornheiser and his regular co-hosts, Tim Kirkjian and Pat Forde, delve deep into the current landscape of Major League Baseball (MLB), discuss the evolving world of Mixed Martial Arts (MMA), and explore significant transformations in college football. The show blends insightful sports analysis with personal anecdotes, providing a well-rounded discussion for listeners.

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Major League Baseball: Brewers’ Dominance and the 2025 Season Outlook

The primary focus of this episode revolves around MLB, with a particular emphasis on the Milwaukee Brewers' exceptional performance this season.

Brewers’ Exceptional Performance: Pat Forde commends the Brewers for their unprecedented 65-game stretch, highlighting their cohesive team dynamics and strategic gameplay. He notes, “They have the greatest 65 game stretch in the history of the franchise” ([22:13]). The Brewers' success is attributed to their aggressive base-running, leading the National League in stolen bases, and their effective starting and bullpen pitching. Manager Pat Murphy’s relaxed and confident style is also credited for fostering a positive team environment.

Pitching Decisions and Managerial Strategy: Tony and Pat delve into specific pitching decisions, critiquing manager Miguel Cairo’s handling of pitcher Cade Cavalli. Tony remarks, “Miguel Cairo makes more pitching changes than anybody I've ever seen” ([05:33]), expressing disappointment over Cairo’s inability to pull Cavalli despite evident signs of fatigue and declining performance. The discussion underscores the importance of timely managerial decisions in maintaining a team’s competitive edge.

Season Unpredictability: Pat Forde highlights the unpredictable nature of the 2025 MLB season, noting, “I look at no team and think, oh, this team is going to the World Series” ([20:14]). This unpredictability is framed as a positive aspect, making the season exhilarating and keeping fans engaged until the very end. The only exception remains the Brewers, whose consistent performance has made them the standout team of the year.

Brewers vs. Nationals: The conversation shifts to the Nationals, examining their potential in the postseason. Pat observes, “The Nationals have good young players. They're on the way up, but they're going to need ownership to spend some money and bring in some more veteran players to help the young guys along” ([25:18]). This analysis highlights the Nationals' promising roster but also their need for strategic investments to secure a championship run.

Notable Quotes:

• “They put the ball in play. What a concept.” – Pat Forde ([22:13])
• “I would have said five's enough. You haven't pitched this long. I don't know.” – Tony Kornheiser ([05:33])
• “We have no idea who's going to the World Series. And that's what makes it so interesting.” – Pat Forde ([20:14])

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Mixed Martial Arts (MMA) and UFC’s Strategic Shift

The hosts transition to discussing the latest developments in MMA, particularly the UFC’s move from ESPN to Paramount and CBS.

UFC’s Financial and Strategic Move: Pat Forde highlights the UFC’s new seven-year, $7.6 billion deal with Paramount and CBS, questioning the motivations behind such a significant shift. He states, “You don't make that kind of move without being pretty sure you're going to get a monster audience” ([09:15]). The discussion focuses on the potential for this move to elevate MMA’s mainstream presence despite its inherent violence.

Hosts’ Perspectives on MMA: Tony Kornheiser and Michael Kornheiser express skepticism about the appeal of MMA. Michael muses, “I won’t watch them. It is just not for me” ([10:02]). They compare MMA unfavorably to other combat sports like boxing and wrestling, emphasizing its perceived lack of strategy and excessive violence.

Future of Combat Sports: The conversation also touches upon the decline of boxing and how MMA is filling that void, albeit contentiously. They ponder whether MMA could ever integrate smoothly into mainstream sports programming, considering its contrasting audience compared to more traditional sports.

Notable Quotes:

• “It's like you're in ancient Rome watching people battle to the death.” – Tony Kornheiser ([12:07])
• “It's like gladiatorial combat.” – Pat Forde ([12:07])
• “They are still trying to piece it together, a rule structure.” – Tim Kirkjian ([44:53])

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Personal Anecdotes: Grilling Mishaps and Culinary Trials

Interspersed between the sports discussions, the hosts share humorous personal stories about cooking and grilling.

Grilling Disasters: Pat Forde recounts his struggles with grilling, admitting, “I made steaks the other day, completely charred them and yet they were raw on the inside” ([19:31]). This lighthearted exchange provides a relatable break from the intense sports analysis, showcasing the hosts' camaraderie and ability to blend humor into the conversation.

Gardening vs. Grilling: Tim Kirkjian adds to the story, comparing his ongoing battle with squirrels to historical trench warfare: “It's kind of like the terrible stages of World War I where nobody got the upper hand” ([36:56]). The playful analogy highlights their challenges in maintaining their garden amidst nature’s interruptions.

Notable Quotes:

• “I'm just surprised my house hasn't blown up or caught on fire from my grills in the backyard.” – Pat Forde ([19:31])
• “It's like good.” – Tim Kirkjian ([36:56])

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College Football: Transformations and NCAA's Role

The episode shifts focus to college football, exploring significant changes that have reshaped the sport in recent times.

Structural Shifts in College Football: Tim Kirkjian asserts, “The format of college football has changed beyond anything we’ve ever seen” ([38:02]). The hosts discuss the dismantling of traditional NCAA structures, free agency-like movements, and the legal battles that have upended the sport’s framework.

Impact of Legal Decisions: Tim elaborates on how recent court rulings have undermined the NCAA’s control, leading to a chaotic environment where athletes have unprecedented freedom to transfer and seek compensation: “It's an Oklahoma land rush. Everybody's just charging and getting what they get” ([43:51]).

Best Coaches and Teams: The conversation includes a nod to Nick Saban’s dominance in coaching, with Pat Forde emphasizing his unparalleled success: “Nick Saban did what stands apart from anything else” ([38:34]). They also discuss standout players like Joe Burrow, considering him among the greatest in the past 25 years.

Future Outlook: The hosts ponder the future of college football, debating potential solutions like congressional interventions or reclassifying college teams as semi-professional entities. They acknowledge the challenges in maintaining academic integrity amidst the sport’s commercialization.

Notable Quotes:

• “It's like gladiatorial combat.” – Tim Kirkjian ([38:34])
• “Every movement he makes is surgical. This is what Shohei Ohtani is.” – Pat Forde ([29:30])
• “It's clearly not for me. But is it, Michael, with people your age and younger, is it that big a deal?” – Pat Forde ([10:25])

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Closing Remarks and Final Thoughts

As the episode wraps up, the hosts reflect on the multifaceted discussions, blending sports analysis with personal stories to create an engaging and informative show. They tease upcoming segments and invite listeners to continue following their diverse conversations.

Final Anecdotes and Future Content: Tony shares a whimsical story about announcing games while under the influence of ice cream, highlighting the show’s humorous side. Additionally, they hint at future guest appearances, including an upcoming interview with Charles Barkley on Tim’s podcast, further enriching the show’s content.

Notable Quotes:

• “This is the Tony Kornheiser Show. Boys and girls, we will take a break.” – Tony Kornheiser ([31:34])
• “Having the goal to shoot a 90 is a great mindset for the average chop.” – Tony Kornheiser ([53:54])

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Conclusion

“We Pray After” offers a comprehensive look into the current states of MLB, MMA, and college football, presented through the insightful and humorous lens of Tony Kornheiser and his co-hosts. The episode balances in-depth sports analysis with light-hearted personal stories, making it a compelling listen for both avid sports fans and casual listeners alike.

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Notable Quotes Recap:

• Tony Kornheiser: “Miguel Cairo makes more pitching changes than anybody I've ever seen” ([05:33])
• Pat Forde: “They put the pressure on the defense by running at all opportunities” ([22:13])
• Tim Kirkjian: “It's an Oklahoma land rush” ([43:51])

Key Takeaways:

• The Milwaukee Brewers are having an extraordinary season, outpacing traditional powerhouses.
• The unpredictability of the MLB season is enhancing fan engagement.
• MMA's future remains uncertain despite lucrative deals, as perceptions of violence hinder mainstream acceptance.
• College football is undergoing seismic changes due to legal and structural shifts, challenging the NCAA's traditional control.
• Personal stories add a relatable and humorous dimension to the hosts' dynamic.

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Transcript

[Tony Kornheiser]

Hey, it's Tony. On today's show we're going to talk some baseball with Tim Kirkchin. We're going to talk about College football with Pat40. They're our regulars. We love having them. But first, let's do some commerce. Boys and girls.

[Unknown Announcer]

You'Re listening to the Tony Kornheiser Show.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Every now and then you score a deal that's almost too good to be true. Like you're getting away with something you shouldn't. Well, now's the time to get in and get away with huge savings during the Hyundai Getaway sales event. Score a great deal on an award winning SUV like the Kona Tucson, Santa Fe or Palisade and go for the technology packed Elantra, their most advanced Sonata yet. Or the all electric Ioniq 5 and Ioniq 6. But getting away with massive savings is just the beginning because every new Hyundai is backed by America's best warranty. That's an industry leading 10 year 100,000 mile powertrain, limited warranty that brings serious peace of mind. Plus you'll get three years or 36,000 miles of Hyundai complimentary maintenance on all new 2025 models. Just one of the many ways Hyundai has your back long after you drive off the lot. Now's the perfect time to get a deal so right it almost feels wrong. At the Hyundai Getaway sales event going on now. Visit HyundaiUSA.com or call 562-314-4603 for more details. The offer ends September 2, 2025. Let me just say that one more time. 562-314-4603T mobile is more than the best network in the game. They're now the best network in America according to the experts at OOKLA Speed Test. So MLB fans are connected from home to home plate with the most advanced 5G, the most towers, and a signal that goes farther than ever. You can keep up with your team on the road, overseas, even off the grid. For baseball fans, it's better over here.

[Unknown Announcer]

Based on analysis by OOKLA of Speed.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Test intelligence data first half 2025 compatible device and plan required for T Satellite. See details@t mobile.com previously on the Tony Kornheiser Show.

[Tim Kirkjian]

The 2018 Winter Games in Pyeongchang is the first time we ever had the luxury of a heated toilet seat in that hotel. Came home and I happen to be 50 years of age the following year. So for my 50th birthday Val Sands got me a heated toilet seat in the house. So for the last six and a Half years.

[Unknown Announcer]

Tremendous.

[Tim Kirkjian]

I'm a grown man and I've not.

[Pat Forde]

Stood up to pee in my own.

[Tim Kirkjian]

House because it's so damn comfortable.

[Unknown Announcer]

This is General George Washington, and you're.

Listening to the Tony Kornheiser show.

We should play that every day. Yes, we should clip every single day. We should play that. I thought we just lost Sean and Michael for a second.

[Michael Kornheiser]

I think we did drop out for a second, but we're back now.

[Unknown Announcer]

Are we back? Sean, Michael, are we back?

Can you back for more cash?

Okay, good.

[Pat Forde]

Oh, there you go.

[Tony Kornheiser]

What a great book that was.

[Unknown Announcer]

So let me just.

Less of a book, more of a collection.

Yeah, yeah. Well, I counted as a book a book that I'd written twice originally and then collected again and written again.

[Tony Kornheiser]

A couple of people in the last.

[Unknown Announcer]

Few days have reached out to me who I knew a long time ago. And so I want to mention that because everyone. It always makes me smile when these sorts of things happen. One of them, Danny Gassman, who was a high school player at Southside High School when I first started at Newsday a few weeks ago, sent me a long note. I have to respond to that. My old friend Mike Landau. We called Otto for Otto M. Schmidlap, this camp guy.

[Michael Kornheiser]

What is autoimch?

[Unknown Announcer]

Oh, he was a television show guy.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay.

[Unknown Announcer]

There was a character on tv, Otto M. Schmidlap. And we called Mike Landau Otto for that. And he would camp and he went to Duke a long time ago, and he reached out and then Billy Mercy reached out, and he was the younger brother of Jimmy.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Jimmy Mercy was one year older than.

[Unknown Announcer]

I. Billy is one year younger than I. Any reached out with this very poignant long piece about, like an essay about growing up in New York when there were three baseball teams there. I mean, it doesn't. It in no way is personal to me. It's just like an essay that he said, which I thought was really well written, but, you know, at some point. Hi, Tony. Like, I didn't. Didn't get any high Tony sense out of it. So that was sort of weird. Anyway, you know, I'm not going to dwell on the Gnats. I'm not going to dwell on the Nats. I'm just going to say this. Last night, Kate Cavalli made his second start of the year. This was in Kansas City. This is a conflict for me because this show officially roots for the Kansas City Royals because Matt Cattra, yes, the manager, has in the past and maybe still in the present. Listen to this podcast. So we root for Kansas City in the same way that we root for the Minnesota Timberwolves because Nathan Bubis is an assistant coach there and we don't, we don't know anybody on the team. Right. But we root for our friends. Absolutely. So they're four back in the line, the Royals? The Royals are, yes. Okay, good. Well, I mean, let's make up some games. If it's at the, if it's at the Nats expense, that's okay. I mean, because I root for them. Yeah, sure. But I will say that it was four to two. I mean, you know, it's two nothing in the first inning. Josh.

Thanks to a Josh Bell home run.

Home run. Josh Bell hits a home run. You know, Josh Bell in the last month is probably batting over 200 breaks. He wasn't for the first four months, you know, so. And good for him. And then Paul DeYoung who was out for, you know, three months with a broken face, got hit in the face. He hit a home run. So they're up 4, 2 going into the bottom of the fifth. They're up 4, 4, 2. Cade Cavalli had a real strong first showing last week, and he's out there. And I write a note to Chuck Todd and Chris Salizza and Michael Kornheiser, and I say, okay, so you, so Cavalli will go one more inning, go in the fifth, and then it's up to the bullpen, you know, and there's a certain pessimism in the note. So I understand that pessimism used three exclamation points. So the bullpen. So I, you know, then I, I get up this morning, I stop at that point because I, it can't be good, right? And then I find out that Cavalli goes to five and Miguel Cairo sends him out there in the sixth inning. What are you doing? What exactly are you doing? And then he gets touched up for a two run homer and they lose the game. And then the bullpen comes in and Rutledge comes in and he gives up a two run home and they lose the game. All right, that's, you know, Miguel Cairo makes more pitching changes than anybody I've ever seen. And then when he should have made a pitching change, goes with the starter, I just, I argue, I argue the strategy. Now, it's easy for me to argue the strategy because I didn't see it. You know, I'm being a backseat driver, as we used to say in the 1950s and 60s. But I'd have taken him out. I would have said, you Know what, son? Five's enough. You haven't pitched this long. I don't know. Ever. You know you're coming out of Tommy John. I. I would have said five's enough. Maybe next time we'll go six. You went four, now you go five. But he went out for the sixth, and it wasn't. It didn't work. Did you see? Well, you couldn't.

I was following along. This is during bedtime. But was it. There was bases loaded right before the ending you're talking about. So you already got out of one jam.

Yes. Yes. He'd been walking too many people. Yeah.

[Michael Kornheiser]

Why would you leave him?

[Unknown Announcer]

No, he was tiring. The story today talked about the fall off in Velocity. You know, you can find that stuff out. There are all sorts of websites you can go to. So if the guy writing the story can find it out, the people on the bench for the gnats can find it out. Just. It just.

[Tony Kornheiser]

It was disappointing.

[Unknown Announcer]

In real time, that's where someone taps you on the shoulder and says, we've got the numbers to prove it's time.

That's exactly what you're supposed to do. Somebody goes to Jim Hickey or Miguel Cairo and said, you know what? Get him out. Here's what this is showing. I ain't. Get him out. No. Right. He went into the sixth. Right. Did he get anybody out in the sixth?

I'll pull it up for you.

Pull it up. Let me know if he got anybody out in the sixth. 5.

We have a lead off Garcia walks. Then we get the home run.

Home run. So. So he goes five full and gives up four. Five. Gives up five. Yeah, something like that. It's just not.

[Michael Kornheiser]

It's not a good start to the Miguel Cairo era.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Well, I, you know, I'm not. No, I'm not crazy. That's not even what I wanted to talk about.

[Unknown Announcer]

I'm not a fan of the ufc, the kickboxing. Right. I don't think it's a sport. You know, I think it's just violence. I think it's bestiality. I. I really don't like it. I don't get it. It's very violent. Yes, it's really violent. But I understand it has an audience.

[Michael Kornheiser]

Yes.

[Unknown Announcer]

And I understand for a bunch of years it's been on espn. Not going to be on ESPN anymore. Going to be on Paramount and CBS because they just signed UFC for seven years. 7.6 billion with a B. Billion dollars. Yeah. What do we think of this? What do we think of this? You don't make that kind of move without being pretty sure you're going to get a monster audience and you're going to do everything you can to get it.

[Michael Kornheiser]

Well, they do those UFC fights, you know, they seem to be a massive deal. It's.

[Unknown Announcer]

I won't watch them. It's now, and I won't talk about them on pti.

[Michael Kornheiser]

For people of, of our age and older, they think, what happened to boxing?

[Unknown Announcer]

Boxing is gone.

[Michael Kornheiser]

It's gone, and this has replaced it. So in that vacuum, you know, this is, this sort of fills it. And I guess they look at the numbers.

[Unknown Announcer]

Men and women, too?

[Michael Kornheiser]

Yeah.

[Unknown Announcer]

Oh, yeah, men and women, too. They. They both are in ufc.

[Michael Kornheiser]

And it's just.

[Unknown Announcer]

I mean, it's not for me. It's clearly not for me. But is it. Is it, Michael, with people your age and younger, is it that big a deal? That's a lot of money.

That is a lot of money. And it can't just be you're trying to fill some sort of live action sport to get eyeballs. I don't personally watch. I never got into the MMA when I was a kid. You think about the other, you know, fights that are now streaming. I watched wrestling just because it was theater. I mean, these were storylines that you sort of followed over the course of, of a season. Not like a sports team, but like, I remember going to WrestleMania. I watched that as a kid, but I, I didn't get into this.

Well, that's a show.

[Michael Kornheiser]

Yeah, that's more.

[Unknown Announcer]

That's a choreographed show.

The same way you're willing to watch, like a Fox drama. You could get into that.

Yeah. Is MMA different than ufc?

[Michael Kornheiser]

Oh, yeah, I thought it was. MMA is, is the sport. UFC is the league.

[Unknown Announcer]

Oh, okay. And I know Dana White is, you know, it runs it and is a big deal guy. It's. It, it is just not for me. But 7. A billion dollars a year. And, and the story I read said.

[Tony Kornheiser]

That some of these things were going.

[Unknown Announcer]

To be on cbs, not just on cable or streaming.

[Pat Forde]

On.

[Unknown Announcer]

Sure.

[Michael Kornheiser]

Because they've got the, the. Yeah, they've got both the properties. Yes.

[Unknown Announcer]

Right.

If you double click into the story, I'd love to know when it gets to the level that you put it on CBS proper.

I'm sure it would be the culmination of four or five fights if you could, if you could build up a person, for example, like that fellow Conor McGregor. Was that his name? Yeah, that's right. Okay. He was a star.

[Michael Kornheiser]

He was a big star.

[Unknown Announcer]

So you could, you could put him you know, on cbs, he would. He would draw people. Most of the people that are fighting, I. I am unfamiliar with their names, although I'm sure there are five or six big stars. Yeah, sure. I. I think maybe it is so violent.

[Michael Kornheiser]

It feels very gladiatorial. Like you're in ancient Rome watching people battle to the death.

[Unknown Announcer]

Are you not entertained?

I wonder if they'll.

[Michael Kornheiser]

Exactly, yeah. And you wonder, like, I turn. Would this ever be like the, you know, the, you know, lead into to 60 Minutes or right after 60 Minutes, something like that? Maybe because that audience doesn't seem like it would mash up with it, but.

[Unknown Announcer]

Well, but if you. If you're getting. I mean, if you get 100 million people watching this thing, if it's that big. Yeah, I don't. Was it that big on espn? I don't think so. But this is so much money, a lot of money. This is like real league money. This is. It's not NFL money, but it's NBA money, isn't it?

[Michael Kornheiser]

Sure.

[Unknown Announcer]

It's college basketball money. It's like real league money.

[Tim Kirkjian]

Wow.

[Unknown Announcer]

I just. Sort of a stunner to me. No, I mean, good for them. It's a product. This is how business works. You. You get yourself a product that people want and you sell it. Yeah.

[Michael Kornheiser]

And it's been very successful. I mean, it is whether or not, you know, we enjoy it. There are clearly a lot of people that do.

[Pat Forde]

Well here.

[Unknown Announcer]

You think about the transference of how can you get people to go from watching something on network to then going back and subscribing to your streaming service. So if you have them going back and forth and all of a sud, you're building that user base. I mean, you, Tony, don't really subscribe to any streaming options. I think most of us have somewhere between this world three to seven. And if you can try and just keep adding that one more, because it has that one show you want to watch or the one rerun or the one live action sport. That's how you get into, you know, auto renew.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I. I'm. I'm. It's. Nothing is aimed at me. No. Shouldn't be. No. I'm not a consumer with any particular future anymore. And I just. I should be allowed to live alone in a small home and just enjoy.

These letters from your friends.

Yeah. So they're. Yeah, that's all I want to do. All right, we'll take a break. Tim Kirchen and Pat, 40, will be with us today, and Tim Kirkjin will.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Be with us when we return. I'm Tony Kornheiser.

[Unknown Announcer]

This is the Tony Kornheiser Show.

[Tony Kornheiser]

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[Unknown Announcer]

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[Tony Kornheiser]

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[Unknown Announcer]

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[Unknown Announcer]

You're listening to the Tony Kornheiser show.

[Tony Kornheiser]

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[Unknown Announcer]

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[Tony Kornheiser]

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[Unknown Announcer]

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[Tony Kornheiser]

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[Unknown Announcer]

That should send me one of these. Yeah, I'd like to see this. A non wrinkle blazer. Yeah.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Because then I don't have to carry.

[Unknown Announcer]

A steamer around with me all the time. This is the Tony Kornheiser Show.

1 1, 2, 3, 4. One late night in Chicago. I break in a Wrigley Field. It's early spring. The season isn't starting for a week. It's a little after midnight. I've been playing down the street at an open Mac and a little bar just, just under the L tracks. I noticed for a couple weeks that they've been doing some work on the ballpark. They got scaffolding up. I climb in. Tonight I got the ballpark Tonight I got the ballpark Tonight I got the ballpark.

That's a song called Ballpark.

[Tony Kornheiser]

That's the genius, Dan Byrne.

[Unknown Announcer]

That's a real song. That's not just for this show. He sounds like Jimmy Buffett does. It is a wonderful, wonderful song. It goes on and on. You can listen to it. Stop listening to me and go listen to it at the end of the show. But it's brilliant.

[Tony Kornheiser]

And it's Dan Byrne about breaking in for real to Wrigley Field.

[Unknown Announcer]

Just breaking it.

[Tony Kornheiser]

It plays in Tim Kirkjin.

[Unknown Announcer]

I gotta start with this. I, I, I grilled squash last night. I grilled yellow zucchini last night. And it didn't have any particular taste. You know, I mean, I, I don't, I just.

[Tony Kornheiser]

It didn't.

[Unknown Announcer]

It was okay. It was. I felt that a great accomplishment, but it wasn't particularly good. Do you. Does that ever happen with you, Tim? I mean, because you're, you like vegetables and we know this through avocados. You ever, like, grill and it's not quite what you're hoping for?

[Pat Forde]

Tony, you're asking me about cooking? We pray after we eat. At my house, when I cook, it's terrible. Yes, I have tried. I have tried to grill vegetables at my house. I am so bad on the grill, it's unbelievable. I made steaks the other day, completely charred them and yet they were raw on the inside. Outside. I'm actually pretty good inside the house. But like most men who are terrible inside the house and good outside on the opposite, I can't grill anything. I made zucchini the other night with squash and I baked it and it was actually good. But when I try to do that stuff on the grill, everything goes wrong. It's. I'm just surprised my house hasn't blown up or caught on fire from my grills in the backyard because I don't know how to use it.

[Unknown Announcer]

So I made a steak last night. The steak was fine. The zucchini, I don't know if it was. Michael. It's the yellow stuff. Is it squash and not zucchini? Right. It just didn't have any particular taste. You know, we cut it into strips and put it on tin foil, and it. Just try. All right, let's get to baseball.

[Pat Forde]

Yes, please.

[Unknown Announcer]

Yeah. All right. So.

[Tony Kornheiser]

So the setup is that losing streaks are inevitable. It's 162 games in a year.

[Unknown Announcer]

But when you get a losing streak may matter. And against whom may matter.

[Tony Kornheiser]

There are four teams that seem to.

[Unknown Announcer]

Not be as hot as they once were. This excludes the brewers, who are still pretty hot.

[Tony Kornheiser]

The Tigers, the Mets, the Yankees, the Cubs. Are any of those particularly concerning to you?

[Pat Forde]

No. Because this year, Tony has made absolutely no sense. The number of times I have gotten on a bandwagon with the team and said, look. Look how good they are. They've won seven in a row. They're. Then they lose eight in a row right after that. And then the team that loses eight in a row, I say, that team is done. The Guardians are done. The Yankees are done. All these. The Mariners are done. And now they're all back in it. This is the beauty of the 2025 baseball season. It has made absolutely more. No sense. Less sense than usual. Because just when you think you understand what's going on in the standings, you realize that you don't. And that's going to make a fabulous final six weeks of the season. And it's going to make for a great October. Because other than the brewers, who right now are unstoppable, there is no other team out there that I look at and say, oh, this team's going to the World Series. I'm certain of that. There isn't one team out there that I look at, not even the Dodgers, and think, oh, this team is great. They're going to the World Series. That's what makes baseball so beautiful. When Jordan's Bulls were hot down the stretch, you knew they were going to the Finals. The warriors were going to the finals with Steph, Clay and Katie, they were going to the Finals. Right now we have no idea who's going to the World Series. And that's what makes it so interesting.

[Unknown Announcer]

Well, let me get to the Brewers. Because you mentioned the brewers.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Something.

[Unknown Announcer]

The Brewers.

[Tony Kornheiser]

This is off the top of my.

[Unknown Announcer]

Head, but probably in their last 60.

[Tony Kornheiser]

To 65 games, they're probably something like.

[Unknown Announcer]

42 and 20, if not even better than that. They have no big payroll, they have no big stars. You. You ask and people like me ask, how are they doing this?

[Pat Forde]

Well, Tony, first off, they have a 10 game winning streak and two of eight or more. So then the only team with three winning streaks this year of eight or more games, no one else has more than one. That's how good the brewers have been. And you're right. They have the greatest 65 game stretch in the history of, of the franchise. And here's how they do it. They put the ball in play. What a concept. They put the pressure on the defense by running at all opportunities. Lead the National League in stolen bases. They go first to third. They go second at home, and they just run until you can tag them out. And most times it doesn't happen. Their starting pitching is terrific. Now. Their bullpen is good. And they have a manager who carries around pancakes in his pocke during the game in case he gets hungry. Pat Murphy has given that team a looseness to it that you can see the minute you walk into the clubhouse. I love being around that team. They are really fun, they are really loose, and they are a confident group. Now, and Christian Yellich, who's won an MVP a few years ago, Tony, he is still a star player, but you're right, they're short on stars, but boy, do they play well together.

[Tony Kornheiser]

You mentioned the manager.

[Unknown Announcer]

The manager got that job because the previous manager, Craig Counsel, elected to leave. He elected to leave and go within the division and go to the Chicago Cubs. And he's done very, very well this year with the Chicago Cubs. But the irony of that is not lost on us, right, that, that you know that the brewers are doing better than the Cubs.

[Pat Forde]

Yes, it's fascinating that Craig Counsel is a great manager. And the manager he learned from was Pat Murphy. Him, the professor. He calls him my teacher.

[Unknown Announcer]

Oh, okay.

[Pat Forde]

Murphy taught him how to be a major league manager. Like when to raise your voice, when not to raise your voice. You know, the. The brewers picked up Andrew Vaughn from the White Sox. They sent him to the minor leagues and just to get him ready. And he came back and he said, look, I can do a lot of things. I could steal bases and all that. And Pat Murphy said, andrew, you can't run. You are slow. You're not going to steal any bases, but you're going to hit a bunch of homers and drive and run. This is how he works things on the team. He's so direct, but he's also so amusing and just so different. And he taught Craig Council how to manage and now the teacher is out managing even his prize student.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Yeah, it's really remarkable. Let's talk about managers for a second. Unless something has happened in the last day or so that, that I'm unaware of, there are three jobs that seem to be open. There's a Pittsburgh job, the Colorado job, the Washington job. These are not, you know, these are teams that are 20, 30 games below.500.

[Unknown Announcer]

Are any of those good jobs?

[Tony Kornheiser]

And if they are, which is the best job?

[Unknown Announcer]

And do you expect more jobs to open?

[Pat Forde]

It's possible more jobs will open. Colorado is not a good job. Ballpark works against you. Organization not run particularly well. Pirates, you know, should be a great job. Beautiful ballpark, tremendous history. Paul Skeens is the top of the rotation, but again, an organization that doesn't appear willing to spend enough money. I think the Nationals is the best job of that group and I think Miguel Cairo is a good choice to be the long term manager. But this is where decisions will be made. And by the way, Tony, so far off the topic, but over the weekend the, the Giants and the Nationals played three straight games and the game time was the exact same for all three games. Think about that. 224. Three. Three straight games were played in the exact same amount of time. I mean, what are the, what are the chances of that? So back to the Nationals. The Nationals have good young players. They're on the way up, but they're going to need ownership to spend some money and bring in some more veteran players to help the young guys along.

[Tony Kornheiser]

All right. There are certain teams out there that by the standings and when I look at them here and there seem to be a little bit better than I thought. Cincinnati is one of them.

[Unknown Announcer]

Oakland or whatever they call that team.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Is one of them. And Toronto is certainly one of them. You can discuss these in any order you want, but I'm interested in Toronto.

[Unknown Announcer]

Because Toronto has spent money before and.

[Tony Kornheiser]

It has not come to any great success.

[Unknown Announcer]

And Toronto right now looks like the team they wanted to put out there five years ago when they started spending money, right?

[Pat Forde]

Yes. And again, Toronto, just like I was telling you earlier, Tony, I counted them out two months ago and then they got completely hot and now they're going to win the division. That's how well they played. They paid Vlad Guerrero Jr. And almost since that time, everything has come together. Boba Shet, shortstop, is a really good player. Their starting pitching is pretty darn good. With Max Scherzer as your fourth or fifth starter, that shows you the depth in their rotation. And they're finally starting to do what they should have been doing all these years. And the window is still open for them to be a dangerous team in October. But they're getting to October. And I repeat, two months ago, I thought, this is a fourth place team. Then they got hot. This is how it's worked all year, especially in the American League.

[Tony Kornheiser]

You mentioned earlier that you would not even look at the Dodgers and say.

[Unknown Announcer]

For sure they look like a World Series team.

[Tony Kornheiser]

What do you think of Ohtani's progress as a pitcher and what impact might that have?

[Pat Forde]

Well, the other, his last start, Tony, he pitched four innings and struck out eight. And in that game, he got hit number 1,000 of his career. So you have to say a complete sentence here. In the game in which Ohtani got hit number 1,000, he struck out eight. I mean, that. That sentence has never happened in baseball history. All right, to answer the question, Ohtani is really starting to make some progress as a pitcher. He's up to four innings now. He's going to be up to six innings by October, and they're going to need him to pitch six innings out of the rotation if they're going to win the World Series because the rest of their pitching is banged up. Even though it's coming back, their offense isn't what we thought it would be because of injuries. I still think they have. They will have the best team in baseball in October if everything works out. But everything means having Ohtani as a really good pitcher. And I think he's headed that way because everything he tries to do, he always accomplishes. It's incredible.

[Tony Kornheiser]

I'm just going to end with that. But I'll ask you this one question.

[Unknown Announcer]

And it is about him that you're exactly right. There are sentences that are said and written about him that have never been written about any baseball player in history before. When you watch him, what do you think?

[Pat Forde]

I think, Tony, he is a baseball machine. Every movement he makes is surgical. This is what I was told. Every step he takes, every run, every swing of bat, every throwing of a baseball is done to make him the most remarkable player we've ever seen. I told you that they asked him, can you pitch the 11am game in Boston on Patriots Day, which was way out of, you know, anyone's realm of comfort and he looked at his manager, this was Phil Nevin a couple years ago, and he said, yeah, I'll just go to bed at 7 o' clock the night before, and that way I'll get all of the sleep that I need because I need X number of sleep in order to be at my best. I'll just go to sleep at 7 o'. Clock. And Phil Nevin looks at me and goes, I don't know about you, but I can't just go to sleep at 7 o' clock when I want to. He even sleeps better than everyone else. Everything he does is designed to make him this baseball machine. Just like Jaws was a. Was a swimming eating machine. This is what Shohei Ohtani is. Everything he does is designed to make him great. So it should be no surprise that he is this great.

[Unknown Announcer]

All right, thank you, Tim. You want to plug your podcast with your boy? You want to tell people how they can get it?

[Pat Forde]

Yeah. It's called is this a great game or what? We're on three days a week, every Tuesday, every Wednesday, every Thursday. We, we have a big interview every Wednesday. We've got Charles Barkley coming up. How about that? Charles Barkley is going to do our podcast. He's going to make US Laugh for 45 minutes, I'm sure. So it's been great. It's the highlight of my entire career working with my son, just like you are with yours, Tony. So it's been absolutely as fulfilling as anything I've ever.

[Unknown Announcer]

Thank you, Tim.

[Pat Forde]

All right, talk to you soon, Tim Kirkjin.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Boys and girls, we will take a break.

[Unknown Announcer]

Pat40 will join us when we return.

[Tony Kornheiser]

I'm Tony Kornheiser.

[Unknown Announcer]

This is the Tony Kornheiser Show.

[Pat Forde]

Tony Kornizer Show.

[Tony Kornheiser]

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[Tony Kornheiser]

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This is The Tony Kornheiser show Foreign.

[Tony Kornheiser]

This is Modern Days.

[Unknown Announcer]

D A Z E Modern Days. That's right.

[Tony Kornheiser]

By Maximilian, who has been with us before, writes it's been quite some time since I've sent a song in for consideration. This one is called Modern Days. It's the instrumental version of a vocal song from my B project be in 2021. I always put out instruments instrumental versions of my songs at the same time the vocal projects are released. The song is about the pursuit of wealth and how that has become the focus of so many. Instead of living day to day and enjoying every moment, the instrumental version has an energy to it that represents that never ending pursuit. And in many ways I like it even more than the vocal version. Hope you like it as well. It's lovely. It is Max Million boys and girls. Michael if independent artists like Max Million want to send in their stuff to be used on the show, how do they do it?

[Unknown Announcer]

Send a Send us your music by emailing it to jinglesonycornazoshow.com and for the rest of August we have TK sand available as the promo code of Johnny O. They have a new NFL collection, so if you get your order in now, it might be here by week two or three.

That would be great. I get some of that stuff.

[Tony Kornheiser]

I like Johnny o plays in Pat.

[Unknown Announcer]

40 and we, we need to start with this. I've. I've had a pretty good run this year with tomatoes and peppers. They haven't been eaten by varmints even.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Though there's no netting around them. I probably.

[Unknown Announcer]

It never works out in terms of the ratio of how much money is spent to what you get back. But I probably had about six to eight tomatoes. I probably had about 10 to 12 peppers. I'm ultimately satisfied and pleased. Pleased because I mean sometimes we go years and we get two and we've.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Done better than that this year.

[Unknown Announcer]

How about you?

[Tim Kirkjian]

Well, congratulations. Last year, I know, was a bitter defeat for you. So it's a good bounce back.

[Unknown Announcer]

Yes. Yeah, it was like having Tommy John.

[Tony Kornheiser]

And just going out and pitching again.

[Unknown Announcer]

It's like good.

[Tim Kirkjian]

We, you know, it's an ongoing trench battle and you have wins, you have losses. It's kind of, you know, like in the terrible stages of World War I where nobody got. Was really got the upper hand and they just went back and forth. That's me and the squirrels right now. And we did put up netting. You know, we've erected barricades, we've done all kinds of stuff and they're still probably getting 10 to 15% of the yield. I would say so. Okay, we got enough big ones to eat some, some BLTs last night. So that was, that was a victory. We took that, you know, but yeah, still every day you wake up and you go out there, you know, with your, your heart pounding a little bit, like, what have the varmints done this time?

[Unknown Announcer]

Yeah, I mean the notion of eat some BLTs, like on a good year, I could eat one BLT. One. So anyway.

[Tony Kornheiser]

All right, that's good to know.

[Unknown Announcer]

You've been working on some stuff like college football stuff like in the last 25 years.

[Tony Kornheiser]

And, and, and you know, I guess you and other people, best coach, best team, best player and all of that.

[Unknown Announcer]

Is there anything that, that stands out to you other than we're going to get to the fact that there has been something in college football. Not in the last 25 years, in the last hour and a half that has changed it beyond anything we've ever seen. Unless they stopped using a football and went to a basketball. I mean, just unbelievable change. But, but preparatory to that discussion, there some notion about best this, best that, worst this, worst that in the, in.

[Tony Kornheiser]

The full quarter century.

[Tim Kirkjian]

You know, I mean, the two things, one just, yes, the staggering amount of change, you know, if you had gone back in 2000 and tried to tell people that, you know, A, players would change teams every year and B, they would be paid handsomely to do so, nobody would believe that. But you know, if you look at the actual on the field product, I think, you know what, what Nick Saban did was what stands apart from anything else, I mean, truly the competition, and took Alabama even beyond where it was with Bear Bryant to a level of dominance and year in, year out competition. The playoff, obviously the advent of the playoff, which I think has been a great thing, hasn't been perfect by any means, but to have a four team playoff where, you know, earlier this decade there was, there was a year earlier this century. I'm sorry, they. In 2004, USC played Oklahoma. They were both undefeated and Auburn was undefeated in the SEC, was 12, 0 in the SEC and couldn't get a sniff of it. That certainly wouldn't happen today and I'm glad it wouldn't. So a lot of changes, some for the better, some for the worse, but it's, it's been a very wild 25 years. I don't think there's another sport that's changed as radically as college football.

[Unknown Announcer]

So I tried to make notes and it's hard I don't really remember anything. I'm unburdened by memory. But. But I certainly would think that Saban would be the guy who's the best coach. I mean, you'd mention Urban Meyer, you'd mentioned Dabo Sweeney, but Saban would win.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Because of what he has accomplished. But I thought of best teams and I thought of best players, and I don't, you know, I'm the wrong guy in this because I don't follow it in the way that you have to follow it. But it seemed to me that the.

[Unknown Announcer]

Joe Burrow team and the Cam Newton team were really, really great. And I think that Burrow is the greatest of them all in the last 25 years. What do you think?

[Tim Kirkjian]

Oh, I think you can certainly make that argument. I mean, we, we debated and I think we have. I don't have it in front of me, but I think we have LSU 2019 as the number two team.

[Pat Forde]

Number one.

[Tim Kirkjian]

We, we had to go Miami 2001 with, okay, that just, just preposterous defense, Ed Reed and just, you know, one player after another, 38 NFL players on that team. And while that's not the best way to decide what was a great college team, it's sure a pretty good precursor. Yeah, 38. And I mean, they average, like, they gave up eight points a game. They had 45 turnovers. They just, that defense just toyed with people. So it would be pretty fun to see the Joe Burrow, Jamar Chase, Jordan Jefferson offense against that defense. But, you know, that's only make believe.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Yeah. The change in college football is so enormous. And if you're a writer for a.

[Unknown Announcer]

Living, if you ever were, you try.

[Tony Kornheiser]

To figure out how this happened. And I think the most obvious question, is the NCAA to blame?

[Unknown Announcer]

Like, nothing gradual happened. There was simply an explosion. Now this, it seems to me, it probably seems to you this could have been managed better, but is the NCAA.

[Tony Kornheiser]

To blame for this? Our college presidents to blame for this?

[Unknown Announcer]

Is everybody to blame? You know what I'm saying? How did, how did it happen that the entire structure collapsed in 10 seconds?

[Tim Kirkjian]

Yeah, you know what? When it's a bad structure, that's how it happens. If you had to, like the, the wall in East Berlin and the whole, the Soviet bloc, when it fell, it fell quickly and drastically. And I think there's some similarities here. Just because it was a flawed structure, it was built on what's been declared an illegal business practice, that you're going to make hundreds of millions of dollars, but you're not going to pay the workforce. And that just got struck down. And then one thing after another, the NCAA is. All their arguments, their decades of arguments just got mowed over in court. And there was nothing else. There was nothing left after that was like, okay, we're not just changing it here. We are just. There's no rules. You know, we. You can transfer where you want, you can transfer when you want. If you don't like the paycheck there in the spring, guess what? In June, you can go somewhere else. And so we have this incredible free agency that has sprung out of basically a vacuum of rules, and they're still trying to piece it together, a rule structure. And, you know, that House settlement, which was a massive change, putting $20 million basically per year per school in the hands of athletes, sets up some parameters, but people are already trying to figure out their way around those rules. So it's basically. It's like, you know, we've just had this complete destruction of the parameters of the sport, and there's not been enough yet to take its place. And so it's. It's. It's an Oklahoma land rush. Everybody's just charging and getting what they get.

[Unknown Announcer]

Yeah. I mean, I'm sure at some point there's a reasonable path forward, but it doesn't appear to be evident to us now. Right. It just doesn't. Right.

[Tim Kirkjian]

Yeah. No, it doesn't. No. And that's why there's kind of two or three avenues of, like, how do we deal with this? How do we get our arms around it? One is, you know, beg Congress to save you. And we all know that's a risky way to try to solve your problems, and nothing happens quickly or necessarily satisfactorily from that standpoint. So they're begging for a congressional Hail Mary that would allow an antitrust exemption so that they can set up a structure that would keep athletes from being employees. Or you figure out a way to collectively bargain with the athletes, and either you just say they're employees, or you somehow break out, like, football and basketball and say that's just going to be a whole different deal from the rest of college athletics. So where. I don't know.

[Unknown Announcer]

Yeah, I think the first thing everybody has to deal with, and people of.

[Tony Kornheiser]

A certain age, it's very hard, and I. I include myself in this.

[Unknown Announcer]

But these are not college students. They're not. These are professional athletes seeking to find the best remuneration that they can. Right. They're just not college students. They're not.

[Tim Kirkjian]

Yeah. No.

[Pat Forde]

And that. That.

[Tim Kirkjian]

That's that's a major disconnect there because technically they are still college students and they are, you know, required to go to class and pass classes even allegedly. Really?

[Unknown Announcer]

But I transfer out, just leave.

[Tim Kirkjian]

But that, well that's, you know, the number of transfers. Look, the chickens will come home to roost in terms of academic progress toward degrees and towards graduation rates. That, that's inevitable. I've talked to enough people who are like, you know, multiple transfers don't help anybody graduate. They only make it worse. So that's coming. But the, you know, the premise here, there are a lot of people who think it would be easier if you just said, you know what? Crimson Tide Incorporated is a semi professional football program that plays at Bryant Denny Stadium and licenses the nickname, logos and uniforms of the University of Alabama. But it's not really a college team anymore. So you know, what would that do to the fans backing of the sport? I don't know. It was an interesting poll of sports fans that the Knight Commission and Emory University did that said 80% still strongly believe that there should be an academic underpinning and that they should be students. But it's tough to make it work in terms of an actual real live association with the university with the way it is now.

[Unknown Announcer]

And it's going to get crazier before it gets settled. I, I read this yesterday that Texas was voted the number one team in preseason. And what I read said Texas had never been voted number one in preseason before.

[Tony Kornheiser]

And I said, what?

[Unknown Announcer]

In the Darrell Royal years Texas never had a team that was number one in the pre preseason. Is that not amazing to you?

[Tim Kirkjian]

Yeah, that boggled my mind. I couldn't believe that either. And yes, you go back to, you know, Texas, I think they won 30 straight games and from like 1960 through 69 through 71 or 68 to 70. So how was that team never preseason number one? The Vince Young team was loaded, but so was USC at that point. So I think USC was the preseason number one in 2005. But no, it's, it's shocking. I mean Texas being Texas, that that is the case. And I mean given that and given the fact that the quarterback's name is Manning, you could say this is maybe the most anticipated season in Texas history.

[Unknown Announcer]

I'll give you that. But then I read they open at Ohio State. I mean Wilbon has always says, oh, the SEC won't anybody. Well how's this? Texas at Ohio State, defending champions. I would think that's a game that might get a slightly high number on television. What do you think?

[Pat Forde]

Maybe.

[Tim Kirkjian]

Maybe? Yeah. No, I mean, people are questioning, is this the biggest opener ever? It's 12 in the coaches fold. It's 13 in the AP poll. And I mean, it's a cataclysm of massive proportion. You know, I mean, this is you. You just don't get games like this to open the year. You may occasionally get one second week, third week, like last year, Texas played at Michigan. Michigan was no good. But still, that was a big, big deal. This is bigger. Much bigger.

[Unknown Announcer]

Oh. Oh, yeah. That's it is all right. Thank you, Pat. Thank you. Thank you. We'll talk soon.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Appreciate it.

[Tim Kirkjian]

You bet. All right, Tony.

[Unknown Announcer]

Thank you, Pat40. Boys and girls, we will come back. We have email and jingle. I am Tony Kornheiser. You're listening to the Tony kornheiser show. Eric DeLong and the Slappy Boys. We love the Slappy Boys. Boys. Yes, Love them.

[Tony Kornheiser]

You want to do the Bethesda Bagel ad, please?

[Michael Kornheiser]

Yes. Bethesda Bagels, we love them. You will as well. Just go to Bethesda Bagels.com for the location in the DC area near Shoe.

[Unknown Announcer]

Then pop on in and you'll be thrilled.

[Tony Kornheiser]

All right, before we get to the mailbag, let me just say this. They furnished off an apartment with a.

[Unknown Announcer]

Two room Roebuck sale, a Sears robo. Sears Robo.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Nobody calls it this anymore. The coolerator was crammed with TV dinners and ginger ale. But when Pierre found work, the little money coming worked out well. C' est la vie, say the old folks. It goes to show you never can tell.

[Unknown Announcer]

Charles F. Barry is just such a.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Great writer and performer. Just wonderful. Thanks to our guest Today, Tim Kirchen. Pat40. Thanks as well to today's sponsors. Remember, you can listen to us on Apple podcasts, Spotify and Odyssey. Get the show through Apple. Please leave us a review.

[Unknown Announcer]

I now need a weekly update about what Tim has messed up on the grill.

Yeah.

Introduce the reverse sear to him and.

We have. Yeah, he ruined it. He charted.

[Michael Kornheiser]

I think it's called a. Technically, it's called a Pittsburgh chart on the outside, raw on the inside.

[Unknown Announcer]

Yeah. Norwegian Soft kitten has written during our.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Winter tour of 1991. 92, when you played bass for us, we pulled into Morgantown to play West Virginia University, only to find we couldn't get into our hotel room for an hour.

[Unknown Announcer]

So we went to a grocery store.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Where we discovered a regional brand of coffee ice cream. Glenn pulled the top off a pint of it, dug a finger in, gave the ice Cream a taste and it was fabulous. You and Alan followed suit and when we all decided it was phenomenal, we filled up our cart with eight half gallon containers of the ice cream. Imagine our consternation when we checked into our hotel room shortly after to find our room didn't even have a small refrigerator freezer. What followed was the three of us pounding down four gallons of coffee ice cream in short order before it melted. When we finished the ice cream, we were wired. That night we were part of a twin bill with Eric DeLong and the boys. But we were so out of control that we got lost heading to the auditorium and by the time we found the venue, Eric and the Boys, the Slappy Boys, were finishing their set. We quickly cut the stage and as you may or may not remember, we were still so hopped up on the coffee ice cream that we tore our way through a frenetic 90 minute set. When we came off the stage, Eric DeLong and the boys were backstage. Eric and the Boys were incredibly gracious to us, complimenting our performance, but we were so wired, we were like three 17 year old greasers who decided to pick a fight with the jocks. Glenn made belligerent comments about how he was a better guitar player than Clapton, let alone anyone in the Boys. Allen was jumping up and down, getting in the faces of Eric and all the boys and he kept shouting, you want a piece of me? You want a piece of me? And you, Tony, you hollered at Eric delong and the Boys things like, I'll bury you chumps with my bass. You wish you had fingers like this as you wiggled your fingers in the face, the face of one band member after another. After four or five minutes of us taunting Eric and the Boys, who all remained polite through the debacle, Eric and the boys looked at each other, gave each other nods, and then almost as a single unit, they stepped forward and slapped each of us right across the face. The slaps brought all three of us back to earth enough to get us to stop our antics. Then we turned and began to shuffle as a unit towards the exit. Just as we reached the exit, you, Tony, turned back to our rivals and said, with truculence dripping from your voice, your band name shouldn't be Eric DeLonge and the boys. It should be Eric DeLonge and the slappy Boys. And then we left. Glenn and Allen, Norwegian soft kid, are they not?

[Unknown Announcer]

Michael, Sean, Are they not brilliant?

[Tony Kornheiser]

Are they not?

[Michael Kornheiser]

I just love that we've moved into Tony Kornheiser fan fiction at this point.

[Unknown Announcer]

What are we talking about?

[Tim Kirkjian]

That's great.

[Unknown Announcer]

Like as that guy says, well like who's doing that, huh? Who's doing that?

[Tony Kornheiser]

Brian Moeller Hearing that you are considering updating your golf clubs hit close to home for me. I too have been using some hand me downs from my father in law. They were at least 20 years old. I recently got fitted for a new set and was listening to your latest golf rant on the way home after completing my first round with the new clubs. Michael is spot on when talking about the improvements you'll see in your game by having clubs that fit your swing. I shot a 90 today and my new arms are nearly perfect. If only I didn't gag off the tee a few times and flush the mouse with my butter. Having the goal to shoot a 90 is a great mindset for the average chop. I've told so many of those to whom I golf about this that we've actually started calling it molar par throughout the round. The goal is to score a five on each hole regardless of what par is. Thus a four is a molar birdie, a three is a molar eagle, etc. You get to you look to score big on the par threes and fours and hope to get no worse than a molar bogey on those par fives. It's made the game of golf that much more fun for all of us. Thanks for sharing all your golf stories with the Littles. Just another great way you bond with all of us other chops out there trying to break 90.

[Unknown Announcer]

P.S.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Please tell Alex Cobb to eat it, which we're happy to do. Clark Gross Knoxville, Tennessee we don't share a lot in common, but one thing we do is our trouble getting out of the sand. As I've explained to my golf buddies numerous times, I'm the worst single digit handicap greenside bunker player in the history of golf. Often when I'm in a bunker, they will ask me to wait a moment while I get their cameras out so so they can film what is sure to be a skull shot over the green. And many times off the course I've tried everything I could to remedy my infliction. I think infliction or affliction, I think should be affliction, including taking a bunker lesson from our pro. Nothing worked. Late last year I was lamenting the fact with a friend of mine who happens to be the Ping rep in our state and he said Ping had a club coming out that would fix that. Simply called the Bunker club, it has 64 degrees of loft and 14 degrees of bounce. This spring, after hitting a bunker shot that ended up in the pool of a house 40 yards away, I decided enough was enough and bought said club. The results were incredible and immediate. You line up square to the pin, don't open the face as we've been all taught, and just swing. The club pops out every time. It's a literal cheat code, to be sure. To be clear, I am not paid by Ping for the endorsement, but in true Tony fashion, maybe they'll send me a free hat for the mansion. And good luck on the links. Michael, have you heard of that?

[Unknown Announcer]

I have heard of this. They come out with something like this every 10 years or so. You should definitely give it a try and to our email or go look up Dan Grieve on social media and YouTube. He has a lot of very approachable videos on bunker play and other short game shots inside of 30 yards.

So Clark can help us and we.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Can help Clark From Mike Todd not that Mike Todd in Columbus, Ohio Dear Dr. Grandpa, on occasion I'm asked to fill in as the public address announcer for the Columbus Clippers, the AAA affiliate affiliate of the Cleveland Guardians. Last week I announced three games of a series against the Gwinnett or Gwinnett Stripers. As I sat down on the first day to go over the opposing team's roster, there he was, Wander Suero. I got to announce his name for two of those games. Not the hat trick I was looking for, but as your old classmate Jimmy Steinman used to say, two out of three ain't bad. Dreams do come true. Isn't that nice? That is Mike in Orange, Virginia first time Long, long time. I wanted to inform you of a unique event that took place regarding the full moon on August 9, 163 years ago during the Civil War. The Battle of Cedar Mountain was fought on that day just south of Culpepper, Virginia. The temperatures that day were in the mid-90s, thought to be the hottest day when a battle was fought during the war. But the story is the moon. On August 9, 1862, a full moon rose and shined over the battlefield as the fighting stopped stopped last Saturday, August 9, 2025 was only the second time since that day, 1930 being the other year, that there was a full moon on Saturday, August 9th. Many soldiers commented about the moon that evening, as I'm sure you would have if you were there. At my age, I might have been there. As a public historian, I hope to be considered for the position of public historian for Culpepper in Orange County, Virginia Absolutely. Eileen Robinson Rochester, Minnesota this summer I was off for six weeks due to knee ligament surgery and it didn't feel like a vacation. I am also a creature of habit.

[Unknown Announcer]

Yeah, vacations.

[Tony Kornheiser]

I don't know.

[Unknown Announcer]

Yeah.

[Tony Kornheiser]

I don't know.

[Unknown Announcer]

Yeah.

[Tony Kornheiser]

And Tim Kelly, Frederick, MD I hope this email finds you in the gang. Having enjoyed a well earned vacation, I recently got back from an Alaskan cruise with my wife, kids and in laws. It was my first cruise and the easiest way to make arrangements for my elderly father in law to see his 50th state. We departed Juneau after enjoying a fine meal in the main dining room. Then during dessert course my party was presented unexpectedly with two scoops of vanilla ice cream each. Having listened to the show for well over a decade, I knew what this might have indicated. As we left main dining, I saw tray after tray come out filled with bowls, each having multiple scoops of vanilla ice cream. I immediately texted my father another little from Frederick named Mark Kelly back home to let him know the next next day ice cream station in the main buffet. I never said anything to my traveling family until we were home.

[Unknown Announcer]

Not sure if I'll take another cruise again. Great.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Is that if you're out on your.

[Unknown Announcer]

Bike tonight, everyone as always do wear white.

[Pat Forde]

I'd like to say thank you on.

[Unknown Announcer]

Behalf of the group and ourselves.

[Pat Forde]

I hope we pass the audition.

[Unknown Announcer]

1-2341 Late Night in Chicago I break in a Wrigley Field it's early spring the season isn't starting for a week It's a little after midnight I've been playing down the street at an open mic at a little bar just under the L tracks I noticed for a come away said they've been doing some work on the ballpark they got scaffolding up I climb in Tonight I got.

The ballpark.

Tonight I got the ball.

Part.

Tonight I got the ballpark all to myself I go check out the bat rack and I straighten out my hat I sit down on the bench where Fergie Jenkins sat walk slowly to the mound where I stretch and that Then I glide fire a couple high and tight and then strike out the side I step to the plates take a couple low swing with all my might watch it go over the wall Tonight I got the ball say that I got the ball say that I got the ballpark all to myself I run in the athlete grass like a mole Curly and Larry announce a couple innings from the press box just me and Harry Cherry I make a leaping catch against the ivy covered wall the early season I is a cushion to my fall I trot in from the warning track my cap and tips the proud float across the infill it's really getting loud I race toward third turn on a dime Dig for home head first slide Sandberg in his prime Tonight I got the ball apart Tonight I got the ball apart Tonight I got the ball park all to myself Then I got the ball park.

[Tim Kirkjian]

Got the.

[Pat Forde]

Ball.

[Unknown Announcer]

Tonight I got the ball all to myself Sa Sam.

[Pat Forde]

Sa.

[Unknown Announcer]

It. Sa.