“Welcome to my morning”

Summary

The Tony Kornheiser Show

Episode: “Welcome to My Morning”

Date: December 12, 2025

Episode Overview

This episode of The Tony Kornheiser Show embodies its signature blend of sports commentary, kvetching about technology, and mailbag musings. The primary theme is Tony’s (amused yet genuinely frustrated) battle against uncontrolled tech updates—Apple’s forced iPhone upgrades in particular—which segues fluidly into reflections on aging, sports, family, and listener feedback. Regular panelists and guests like Michael Kornheiser, Jason La Canfora, James Carville, and Jeff Ma join Tony to break down everything from the NFL week, to naming babies, to the tangled state of customer service and modern digital life. True to form, the show’s tone is self-deprecating, sharp, warm, and often very funny.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Tech Frustration—The "Apple Update" Rant

[01:05-04:45]

• Tony opens the show venting about Apple’s forced update on his phone, bemoaning how the tech changes upsets his carefully maintained routines.
• He criticizes the removal or shifting of familiar app interfaces (e.g., changes to Safari, the Clock icon, and display orientation).
• Quote:
  “I’m too old for... I don’t want my phone updated. They updated it anyway. Even though I always press later because I don't want it updated!” —Tony ([01:57])
• The group discusses how tech companies claim to improve life but often just disrupt comfort, especially for older users.
• Michael and others try to help Tony with alternative settings and accessibility features. But Tony is firm:
  “There should be qualifiers. If you are over a certain age, you should have the right to say no.” —Tony ([04:04])
• They bemoan the constant changes mirroring frustrations with other things moving online and being reorganized, like The Washington Post’s sports section.

2. The Aging & Grumpiness Lament

[04:55-11:47]

• Tony, reflecting on the constant, unwanted tech changes, draws parallels to customer service struggles (e.g., with Cigna/Evercore), which he rebrands as “Calculated Indifference Gives No Aid.”
• Commentators empathize, sharing stories of device confusion, generational shifts in tech, and the feeling that life “improvements” often aren’t.
• Quote:
  “I know you think you’re improving everyone's lives, but some people's lives are not improved by what you're doing...You're not.” —Tony ([11:21])

3. Mini Review: The New Yorker Documentary

[05:56-06:48]

• Tony watched the Netflix documentary on The New Yorker’s 100th anniversary.
• He brags affectionately about seeing his friend David Remnick featured, mentions Remnick’s sporting background, and how the magazine’s demographic is aging.
• Quote:
  “The New Yorker is the Subaru of magazines… It made me very happy to see him.” —Tony ([06:09])

4. Sports Talk: Sharon Moore Fallout & Football Chatter

[06:49-07:31]

• Tony quickly addresses the Sharon Moore saga, making clear the show only comments on well-sourced reporting, not unsubstantiated rumors, and succinctly assesses Moore’s prospects:
  “He’s radioactive at the moment.” —Tony ([07:09])

5. Mailbag: Listeners on Being ‘Old,’ Family, & Fame

[07:54-16:36]

• Tony reads heartfelt listener emails, including a shout-out to retiring postal worker Scott Nelson ([08:54]) and fan correspondence from Canada and elsewhere.
• Themes in letters: generational appreciation for the show, fans reflecting on aging (“Father Time is truly undefeated”), and the “elderly grump” persona Tony embodies.
• Quote:
  “I've listened to you through so many facets of my life, but it seems like you stay the same—an annoyed old man yelling from the porch.” —NJ in Calgary ([10:47])
• Some humor about considering a switch from Apple to Samsung, but despairing, "Who else makes phones?" ([11:07])
• Extended, warm conversation about naming children and family heritage, leading to thoughts on the challenges of parenting adult children.
• Quote:
  “Here’s the tough thing about being a father...Sometimes you don’t like [your kids’] decisions and you want to be able to say, you know, I love you, but I’m not crazy about that. But it’s hard to do that…So it’s a hard thing to walk through and to do. Well, I don’t do it well. I blurt stuff out. I’m not good and but I smile at the end." —Tony ([15:20])

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NFL, Sports, and Panel Discussion

6. NFL Recap: Tampa Bay, Philip Rivers, and Aging QBs

[21:09-29:08]

• Jason La Canfora joins to break down the latest NFL games and stories.
• Todd Bowles’ coaching tenure and the tottering Tampa Bay Bucs are scrutinized following another loss.
  “They're becoming experts at losing football games…They look like a team with an injured psyche. A wounded psyche.” —Jason La Canfora ([21:34])
• Discussion of fading run defense, Baker Mayfield's injuries, and whether the Bucs’ season (and Mayfield's time in Tampa) is finished.
• The recurring musical theme (Dan Bern’s football song) lampoons the NFL's constant recycling of old QBs.
• Anticipation about aging QB Philip Rivers’ rumored return to play, skepticism about the wisdom/safety of such comebacks.
• Quote:
  “This is really, like I said, walking off the farm or whatever. I think it’s fraught with peril…I don’t think they have much of a chance to win this football game.” —Jason La Canfora ([28:11])

7. Joe Burrow’s Future & NFL Franchise Realities

[29:49-32:32]

• Tony and Jason discuss Joe Burrow’s public “NBA-style” unhappiness, whether he’ll be a “Bengal lifer,” and how the Bengals’ personnel choices and organizational depth may drive his eventual exit.
• Quote:
  “I've long said and long written that he's not Bengal lifer…I don't personally think he sees himself as doing all that with the Bengals because I'm not sure that he believes in his heart that they're ever going to win as badly as he wants to win.” —Jason La Canfora ([30:26])

8. Baltimore Orioles’ Pete Alonso Acquisition

[32:32-34:16]

• Baltimore gets praise for signing Pete Alonso, not just as a power-pickup but as a symbolic move—a step “real organizations” take to contend.
• Quote:
  “It’s huge for Gunnar Henderson…it realigns a lot of things for this organization and takes a lot off some other people’s shoulders.” —Jason La Canfora ([34:10])

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Sports Wagers & Guest Picks

9. James Carville’s Rant & Picks

[36:31-40:33]

• James Carville delivers his regular segment, mixing college football insight with sharp barbs about Louisiana political interference at LSU.
• Picks for the week include the Bears, Bills, Rams, and Steelers.
• Memorable Quote:
  “At first you gotta level it and then you gotta rise. This is the week. This is the week we go rise.” —James Carville ([38:54])

10. Jeff Ma: Analytics vs. 'The Eye Test,' NFL Betting

[42:20-53:20]

• Jeff Ma weighs in on the “analytics vs. intuition” debate in baseball management.
• Quote:
  “The only way to make great decisions over a long course of time is to do it based on data. Otherwise…we just can’t make—we can’t divorce ourselves from our emotions.” —Jeff Ma ([48:11])
• Football picks: Patriots, Bengals, Saints, Lions, Broncos
• Discussion of the new Nationals’ GM, Paul Tabone, and the trend of youth and analytics in modern MLB.

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Listener Mailbag—Life, MRIs, Croquet Glory & More

[54:00–67:00+]

• A stream of witty and touching listener letters about MRI experiences, aging, uncomfortable tech, croquet championships, suburban construction, and more.

• Notable MRI stories include combatting claustrophobia with golf visualization, the Navy’s effect on comfort with confined spaces, and the surprise medical findings that come from being “in the tube.”

• Quote:
  “So now whenever I’m stuck in an MRI, I borrow a page from the major. I play around in my head...Inside the mri, my drives never find a bunker, my approaches always hold the green, and I never three putt.” —Listener Email ([56:00])

• Croquet world champion listener makes his pitch for show official croquet player, only to name someone else. ([64:44])

• Banter about roast beef consumption:
  “I just ate the roast beef in my hand.” —Tony ([67:57])

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Notable Quotes & Segments (with Timestamps)

• “I was going to tell you what was coming up on the show today, but Apple decided to do a forced update…I hate Apple. Happy holidays, everyone.” —Tony ([00:00])
• “Calculated Indifference Gives No Aid. Yes, that's it. Cigna.” —Tony on his insurance company ([01:26])
• “Leave me alone. Let me have my phone the way I want to have my phone.” —Tony ([04:21])
• “We’re not going to deal with the things that are on the internet which says, I heard that. …We’re not going to do that.” —Tony on show’s editorial standards ([07:09])
• “Father Time is truly undefeated.” —Listener quoting Mike Wilbon ([10:47])
• “Just have a setting on your phone that just goes, stop, stop.” —Michael ([11:47])
• “You spent so much time wondering whether you could do this, you never thought whether you should do this.” —Jurassic Park quote via panel ([11:53])
• “I don’t know what I am. I am a creature of habit. If it worked for me yesterday, I press it again today and they changed it and they do this.” —Tony ([03:48])
• “It’s amazing how quickly it becomes just second nature to the way you maneuver through anything.” —Michael ([05:37])
• “We had five national championships in this century...Not many schools do that.” —James Carville, proud LSU alum ([38:31])

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Memorable Moments

• Tony’s “boomer” meltdown over Apple’s update—frustration, comic defeat, and relatable resistance to change ([01:57–04:45])
• The back-and-forth about generations, technology, and what “help” really means, laced with sarcasm and self-awareness ([11:07–11:53])
• Jason La Canfora diagnosing NFL losing cultures and how “life comes at you fast, man”, linking sports to wider lessons ([29:49])
• Tony’s deadpan description of eating roast beef “in my hand” ([67:57]), the kind of small, mundane, yet oddly profound detail that defines the show’s voice.
• The mailbag sampling the full spectrum of the show: nostalgia, specialized professions (cardiac device specialists, croquet champions), and the gratitude of the listenership.

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Episode Structure & Flow

• 0:00–01:05: Cold Open, Tony’s Apple iPhone rant.
• 01:05–04:45: Tech complaints, Insurance rants.
• 04:45–11:47: Listener mail, parenting, technology, aging
• 11:47–16:36: More mail, naming children and family.
• 21:09–34:17: NFL analysis with Jason La Canfora.
• 36:00–40:33: James Carville’s weekly picks.
• 42:20–53:20: Jeff Ma’s analytics talk and picks.
• 54:00–67:00+: Mailbag, rapid-fire listener contributions, Bethesda Bagels ad, and closing banter.

Note: Ads/promo segments and musical bumpers are skipped in this summary.

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Tone & Takeaways

The Tony Kornheiser Show remains a sanctuary for the curmudgeonly, the sports-obsessed, and anyone who appreciates wry, heartfelt talk about modern life’s absurdities. This episode, in particular, is a masterclass in self-aware griping, delivered with warmth and winking humor, buffered by wise, funny, and occasionally touching perspectives from listeners and guests alike. Tony’s voice as America’s lovable, if mildly combative, “old man yelling from the porch” has never been truer—or more needed.

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For First-Time Listeners

• You don’t need to be a sports fanatic—the show uses sports as a frame for broader conversations about life, family, technology, and growing older.
• Recurring segments and inside jokes abound (e.g., “littles,” roast beef, Bethesda Bagels), but the podcast is accessible thanks to Tony’s storytelling and the authenticity of guest contributions.
• If you’ve ever hated a phone update, wondered when you turned into your parents, or just want reassurance that you’re not alone in befuddlement, you’ll feel right at home.

Transcript

[A]

Hey, it's Tony. I was going to tell you what was coming up on the show today, but Apple decided to do a forced update on my phone that has greatly angered me. So now all I can tell you is that I hate Apple. Happy holidays, everyone.

[B]

Hey, Dan here from Heed the Call. You know how in football, timing is everything? You miss your window by a second and the play's already gone. The holidays are the same way. Everything happens fast. And if you're not ready, you're scrambling at the last minute. That's why Amazon prime is the real MVP this season.

[C]

With Prime's fast free shipping, you can make those last minute calls look effortless. Forgot your secret Santa gift?

[A]

Need something for that office party?

[C]

Prime's got your back, helping you go from oh to all set. Faster than a two minute drill.

[B]

Absolutely, Mark. Because prime isn't just about getting things fast. It's about making sure you never miss your shot. It turns that last minute scramble into a smooth holiday win. So this season, remember, Prime's fast delivery has your back during the holidays. Especially when it's down to the wire and can't wait another minute. Last minute gifts delivered. It's on Prime. Visit Amazon.comprime to shop now.

[A]

Previously on the Tony Kornheiser Show. So it was suggested to me by a doctor, Dr. Mark Krayman that I get an MRI. Of course, Cigna refused.

[C]

At least you got a response.

[A]

Yeah, you need to go for physical therapy at least six times before we deal with this.

[C]

But does this not count as something related to a previous inquiry?

[A]

Not. Not to cigna. What does it stand for again? Calculated indifference gives no aid. Yes, that's it. Cigna. They've now been taken over by Evercore. You know what Evercore stands for? Calculated indifference gives no aid. The Tony Cornheiser show is on now. I hate Cigna. And I hate Evcore. Because it's Cigna.

[D]

Same thing.

[A]

You know what else I hate? I told him, I hate my phone.

[C]

Your phone update.

[A]

I hate my phone.

[C]

Welcome to my morning, everybody.

[A]

They just. I. I'm too old for. I don't want my phone updated. They updated it anyway. Even though I always press later because I don't want it updated. Yeah, they updated it anyway.

[C]

They had to go to the glasses.

[A]

They changed the icon of the clock.

[C]

Yep. That's his biggest gripe.

[A]

No, it isn't my biggest gripe. I can't get on safari. I only use four things. I use the alphabetized listing of people's numbers that I know. I use text Messages.

[C]

Contacts.

[A]

Yeah, contacts. That was called. I use text messages. I use my weather apps, and I use Safari to get on espn. So I press Safari and I'm going to. At the bottom, I have these choices of things I can go to, and one of them is espn. But I know Jared Duran shows up a picture of Jared Duran.

[C]

He favorites every single thing that gets sent to him.

[A]

I. I don't understand how this works.

[C]

Who would like to guess how many tabs are open on this Safari?

[A]

I can't get rid of Jared Duran.

[C]

Hundreds.

[A]

I can't get back. I am a creature of habit. I want. I don't want this. I. They do this to me all the time. They take away the date of the week or the date of the month. They take away, you know, a radar app. I have nothing to. I don't do this. They do it. Yeah. Is it. Who is it? Who does it? Apple?

[C]

Big Apple.

[A]

Yeah. I hate them. Yeah. You know, now they've changed my phone. Now my phone is coming horizontally instead of vertically.

[C]

So if you remember years ago, I changed. I toggle it so that your phone would not go into landscape because you like portrait, being a man of a certain age. So now we are back in portrait mode and I think we have resolved your issue with Safari. Because when you open up Safari, I don't know, rather than going to something like Google for your default search, you like to go to Yahoo.

[A]

I don't know.

[D]

You're a Yahoo guy.

[A]

I don't know what I am. I am a creature of habit. If it worked for me yesterday, I press it again today and they changed it and they do this. There should be qualifiers. If you are over a certain age, you should have the right to say no.

[C]

There are accessibility features for your phone. But what's tough is that with the, with the recent updates, there is a quality of making the screen itself and the apps more hideous. No, just they're. They're less dense.

[A]

They lighten the picture of Chessy.

[E]

They.

[A]

They're coming after your dog of the color of Chessy. Somebody thinks that. Somebody thinks he or she is an artist. And they're going to change the look, they're going to change the typeface, they're going to change the way the letters. Don't do this to me. Leave me alone. Let me have my phone the way I want to have my phone.

[C]

So the longest. We now have a extra group on the, on the Berry page. Everyone has a Berry page on their phone. You go all the way to the right. And now it's just called extras for you. So all the forgotten apps that you can't delete, they're in extras.

[D]

The good news is there is no good news. Well, just as you get used to this new format after this is you're like, okay, finally. I'm used to all the changes. They'll update it again.

[A]

This is like the Washington Post sports section now. Yeah. Which stinks beyond words in terms of how you get the stories. They have rearranged, how you do that. They it on the. I did so awful. I mean, I can't even explain it because people are laughing at me.

[C]

No. But this is something we have all. We've all experienced this where you try and say, set up later or you know. Yeah.

[D]

And when it finally happens, you're like, I didn't want this.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Overnight you wake up bleary eyed.

[A]

You're like, don't want it. It does not improve my life.

[C]

It is amazing how quickly it becomes just second nature to the way that you maneuver through anything.

[A]

Maybe. But it's bothering.

[C]

Was your anger offset by the catalog that I brought you?

[A]

Oh, the Virginia Diner peanut catalog is.

[C]

Yeah. They got some holiday specials.

[A]

So many. That's so good.

[D]

That is great.

[A]

All right, so I hate my phone.

[C]

Check that out.

[A]

I watched the New Yorker. I watched the 100th anniversary documentary on Netflix.

[C]

Make you feel smug?

[A]

No, I didn't feel well. Yes, the New Yorker.

[C]

Performative viewing.

[A]

The New Yorker is the Subaru of magazines. Okay. But my friend David Remnick edits it and he's on all the time in this thing. And it made me very happy to see him. He was originally hired by Tina Brown. And when they show his original picture, it says, David Remnick, sportswriter, the Washington Post.

[C]

Can you break this up over two nights of viewing or do you really.

[A]

Okay, yeah, sure. Yeah. So I really enjoyed it. I'm glad to see. I was playing a guitar at one point. I know. Remnant played the guitar.

[C]

We're now at that age where the cartoons are like, we are their demo audience.

[E]

Sure.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. He's on a peloton also.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

I wrote him.

[A]

I said just a peloton. And he goes, well, during the pandemic.

[C]

He did that pr.

[A]

I have to say that, that I don't even. I don't want to get into the Sharon Moore thing all that much. I just want to say to people out there on this show, we're going to talk about what we know. The reporting that we trust from sources that we trust. We're not going to deal with the things that are on the Internet which says, I heard that. Well, no, we're not.

[C]

From my dad or mom.

[A]

Yeah, we're not, we're not going to do that. We're not going to do that. But I think it's safe to say at this point that Sharon Moore has flushed his life and career down a toilet. Yeah, we're not. He's not going to get a good job again. It's going to take a long time. Long time, people. He's radioactive at the moment. So. Also a couple of things about my dad's chips.

[D]

Oh, so.

[A]

Well, I have, I gave my dad's chips to Sean Reese who said they, they're so good they should be illegal. They're like, yes, cocaine.

[C]

Which, which flavor did you try?

[A]

I give the original because it's my favorite flavor. That's good. And Jason, who walks Chessy says these are fabulous.

[D]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah, these are fabulous. Okay, let me get to some mail that we have. This is not, you know, not in the email segment.

[C]

It's a holiday show.

[A]

Yes, everything's a holiday show. First of all, let me thank Amy Petty. Petty from Warrenton, Virginia. Very nice. Thank you very much for that note. Wendy Nelson in Dell Rapids, South Dakota. My husband, Scott Nelson has spent countless hours listening to your show. He still laughs when he tells me about Maggie and a garbage can. He has since converted me to Littledom the tinfoil brick. I was wondering if you could please give him a shout out since he's retiring after about a 30 year career with the United States postal system. He even won the million mile award for driving a million miles with no accidents. You spend a lot of time with him as he traversed his hundred plus mile a day route. 100 plus mile a day route along the rural roads of Dell Rapids, South Dakota. His last day is officially December 17th. His customers appreciate him. They're called customers. That's an odd. That is interesting. Yeah, his customers appreciate him. His family loves him, but he would think the world of you and me. If you please read this on the air and give him a shout out. So I mean we get these all the time and many I don't do, but that was very nice.

[D]

Yes.

[A]

Here's one from NJ in Calgary in Canada. Not too much substance here, but just my long winded experience of watching you on PTI since I was a kid and more recently your podcast. I started watching PTI around the time it started as a 15 year old high school student. My mom, who's around your age from What I gather would say when she heard yours and Mike's voices. What I can only translate to why do those idiots have to yell at each other? Can't they speak at a regular volume? And and I would respond by saying that as part of the charm of the show. Nowadays this only happens if I have to be having to be driving my parents around or have PTI or podcast on. My mom will say are those guys still on the air? I always loved your perspective on athletes in the sports world. Perhaps I was actually older than my years because no one else my age liked you. That's nice to know. I think many of your what's the words appear in my regular vocabulary. I watched PTI whenever I could in recent years, mostly listen to it on Spotify. My work has more recently required me to be on the road and as a result I discovered your podcast. I find your content increasingly more relatable as I approach 40. Your grievances with the gas company, customer services, sandwiches, liquor stores, general human experiences and self driving vehicles put a smile on my face sometimes just to laugh at myself as I realize as Michael Wilbon loves to say, Father Time is truly undefeated. I sometimes say to my wife when encountering some of these experiences in my day to day life, I think Tony Kornheiser would agree with me. She thinks I'm nuts. Recently we were watching Wheel of Fortune. Did I mention I'm getting old and one of the contestants was from Bethesda. My wife said I've never heard of Bethesda. Understandable since we live in Calgary, Alberta, Canada. But of course. I exclaimed. I feel like I know exactly where that is. Tony Korniser talks about it all the time and proceeded with my rendition of the Bethesda Bagels ad. Apparently advertising works. I've listened to you through so many facets of my life, but it seems like you stay the same. An annoyed old man yelling from the porch. I seem to be also on my way there. If you're ever in Calgary, I'd love to hear one of your stories in person. It's just lovely that. Great. It's a lovely, lovely email.

[C]

But he could help you with your phone.

[A]

Well, you helped me with my phone. I just, I think it's intrusive. I think what Apple's they have, it is the ability to do something that I don't want them to do. And part of me woke up this morning when I saw this. I said I'm getting out of Apple. I'm going to go get another phone. Who else makes Phones go to, like, Samsung.

[C]

I would just love to see the tracking of your phone from here to the steam room.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

To the pharmacy.

[A]

Yeah. I don't. I don't go many places.

[D]

Yeah, it's. I. Yeah, it's tough, like, getting a different kind of phone, because they're going to be issues with that, you know?

[A]

So, I mean, basically what I want to say is this. I know you think you're improving everyone's lives, but some people's lives are not improved by what you're doing, by your ability to swoop in and do this against my will. You can do this. You have the technology, you have the expertise, and you just do it. I understand you think you're helping. You're not.

[E]

Right.

[C]

Once you get to a comfort level, just have a setting on your phone that just goes, stop, stop.

[A]

Leave me alone. I want to. Leave me alone.

[D]

Well, this is like the great line from Jurassic Park. You spent so much time wondering whether you could do this, you never thought whether you should do this.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. This is from Corey Russell. I am roughly also from Canada. In British Columbia. We must do well in Canada. Yeah, we must. I am roughly the same age as Michael, born the same year. Had my start late carrying on the torch. My firstborn son, a masculine child, was born on June 6, 2024. It's a great birthday in Langley. Yes, it is. It is. Six. 624 is great. Yeah, it's great in Langley.

[C]

British two plus four six.

[A]

Columbia, Canada. Naming a child proved harder than I imagined. When my wife told me she was pregnant, I was incredibly excited and during a naming spree, had the thought, that'd be funny if I named my kid after Mr. Tony. My wife would think I'm crazy. She's aware. She's aware of the pot. A loyal little cannot go nearly 10 years of marriage and not mention a podcast moment. At some point, never mentioned a word to her. After some time, in many Alexa discussions on meanings of names, I was getting annoyed, just like the person related to me by marriage. Unbelievable frustration at most names reminding us of people we absolutely dislike, and incredible frustration that this was taking so long to find a suitable name. My wife was gracious enough to understand that since this was my first son, I would be allowed to choose the first name and she could give a middle name from her Kazakh background. And this gave me the courage to ensure that I did not flush the mouse here. I remember catching this strange old man waving a Canadian flag on tv, seemingly partial to my home country. This is where it all started. Orange man from here I found the wtem broadcast and I was hooked. Your brash attitude never let me down. Several suspensions for wild words coming out. Vacation. And I enjoyed vacations. Yes. And I enjoyed every moment of it. What also interested me was the unique relationship you have with Michael and the effort in recent years to give back to the years that were almost missed long ago. Without getting too far into the weeds. It is something of interest to me. So with my firstborn son on the way and the path he will have to forge to form bonds with family, I felt it was only right. Half waf doctor. I mean, what are we even doing here? This is a slam dunk. On a lighter note, Spotify has been confirming year after year a personal goal I never thought possible actually being in the top 1% of something.

[D]

Wow.

[A]

Garcia, by the way, interrupt to say he said it was in the top 12%. I said, no, you are number one again. It just. Cory continues to write and I continue to read again. It just seemed fitting as you have accompanied me on the following journeys. National disaster responses with the American Red Cross while living in California. Recruiting students to fulfill their film industry dreams while living in Vancouver. Operating medical cannabis shops in Vancouver and Toronto. Growing over 10 million square feet of the same.

[E]

Wow.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

10 million square feet the same in Canada, the United States, Colombia and Portugal. And now back in Ladysmith, British Columbia, Canada with my wife and son Anthony. And that's Ildar Charles Russell, a 10 pound baby boy at birth. Happy and excited. It is with a sincere and warm heart that I wish Nigel, Sean, your entire family and of course yourself a happy holiday season. I will hang up and listen. Isn't that nice?

[C]

That's great.

[A]

Isn't that nice?

[C]

I love the process of going through potential names and trying to honor different family members.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You know, we had a similar thing where because we had a, you know, a bit of a mouthful with Koronizer, we wanted to recognize Liz's family with a first name. And then, you know, maybe we brought in one of my names for the middle name, which you had some issue with over the years, but think it's crazy.

[A]

It just struck me as crazy. I mean, it's. Look, it's your child, the hammer.

[C]

Philip Korneiser.

[A]

You can do what you want to do. It's okay. I just. But it's. Here's the thing.

[C]

One of the first calls.

[A]

Here's the tough thing about being a father. And I say this for everybody, as your children grow up and make their own decisions, which they are not Only allowed to do. Which you encourage them to do. Sometimes you don't like those decisions and you want to be able to say, you know, I love you, but I'm not crazy about that. But it's hard to do that cuz you don't want to create any enmity between you and your child. So it's a hard thing to walk through and to do. Well, I don't do it well. I blurt stuff out. I'm not, I'm not good and, but I smile at the end and the smile is supposed to convey it's okay just because I don't like it. You liked it. It's okay. You know it's going to happen to you.

[E]

Oh yeah.

[A]

It happens to everybody. And so there's things that Michael has done where I've gone. No, I'm not crazy about that. You know, things Elizabeth has done. Not crazy about that, but I'm crazy about them.

[D]

Yes.

[A]

So it's, it's okay.

[D]

It's all the matters.

[A]

I don't know if it's okay. Michael has given me that I'm not.

[C]

I'm still thinking about names. We still have all the lists for all the potential names and there's names that never were and all the, they all, they all fit.

[A]

So it's stuff. Jason. That's right. Jason Lock confirmed.

[C]

Don't even get him starts from er. Names.

[A]

Jason Locan4 when we return, I'm Tony Kornheiser. This is the Tony Kornheiser Show.

[E]

Tony Kornheiser Show.

[A]

This episode of the Tony Kornheiser show is brought to you by Wild Grain. You know, the holidays are right around the corner and one of the most important things for you is to try to find a way to make your gathering special without turning your kitchen into a stress zone. And that's why I think you'll love Wild Grain. Wild Wild Grain is the first baked from frozen subscription box for artisanal breads, seasonal pastries and fresh pastas. And everything bakes in 25 minutes or less. Unlike many store bought options, Wild Grain uses simple ingredients that you can actually pronounce. And their slow fermentation process makes these breads easier on your belly and richer in nutrients and antioxidants. We have these. I gave Michael the chocolate croissants. How great were those kids?

[C]

Loved it. And honestly, it's something that you should always have in the freezer to pull it out to surprise guests. And it makes your house so smell great. And it looks like it came straight from a bakery.

[A]

So there's a lot of things that I haven't tried yet. There's a bread that I'm waiting to try, but I have tried the cranberry pecan rolls. They're fabulous. And like, I was a little bit surprised, I have to say. I don't want to go on and on, but I was a little bit surprised that you don't thaw them out. No, you put them right in the oven, right out of the freezer. So it says you're not waiting around. And what I had was great. I'm just, I'm just saying that here's the best part. For a limited time, Wild Grain is offering our listeners $30 off your first box, plus free croissants in every box. Yeah, there you go. When you go to wildgrain.com Tony K. To start your subscription. You heard me. Free croissants in every box and $30 off your first box when you go to wildgrain.com Tony K. That's wildgrain.com TonyKay or you can use the promo code Tony K At checkout. Use the code people. This stuff's good. Now. This stuff is good. You're listening to the Tony Kornheiser show. Have you ever thought about how most security systems only alert you after something bad has already happened? If they could stop someone from breaking in before they even got inside, why wouldn't they? That's why you should use Simplisafe just like Nigel has been doing for years. Its proactive AI powered cameras detect potential threats outside. And if something seems off live, agents can step in, talking to the person through the camera, warning them they're on video and calling police if needed. They can even trigger a siren or spotlight. Basically, it stops crimes before they happen. Setting it up is a breeze. The monitoring is rock solid and it gives you real peace of mind when you're away. No long term contracts, no hidden fees. You can cancel anytime. And with a 60 day money back guarantee, it's risk free to try. U.S. news & World Report has named Simplisafe one of the best home security systems for five years running this month. Only take 50% off any new system. Wow. This is one of the best prices you will ever see for SimpliSafe. Don't miss it. Hit SimpliSafe.com Tony again, that's SimpliSafe.com Tony lock in your discount because there's no safe like Simplisafe. You're listening to the Tony Kornheiser.

[F]

Show with Philip Rivers coming back. The baby the mayors brought back. Sid Lupman to run the old wing tee. The Lions got old Bobby Lane to sling the pigskin down the field. Elway to the Broncos, Marino to the fish. Jets fans who were praying for Joe Namath got their wish. The Colts got Peyton Manning back and Johnny Yu too. The Vikings got Joe Cap too, come back and play quarterback. John Hadel to the Chargers. Pittsburgh, they got Bradshaw back. The Niners got Montana and Steven Young to both play quarterback. The Chiefs stuck with Mahomes. The Cowboys, they got Aikman. Green Bay got Bart Starr to run the packers sweep again for Norm Van Brocklin. The Eagles made a beeline. The Bengals, Kenny Anderson. The Giants, they got Eli Drew Brees went back to New Orleans. And brother, that's no fable. The Cardinals got Kurt Warner. The Rams got Roman Gabriel Brady tore his blazer of when New England call. The Browns, they got Frank Ryan to hand Jim Brown the ball. Can't wait to see all these guys returning to the spotlight. Let's hope their O lines keep them momentarily.

[A]

Upright. The brilliant Dan Byrne, who knows more about sports than I do and can paint and can sing and can play guitar. Yeah. The multi talented, brilliant Dan Byrne. Five player plays in Jason Lockin four. And we will get to Philip Rivers, obviously, but I think we start as we always start with. What, if anything, did we learn with last night and Todd Bowles went.

[E]

Off.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. What was.

[E]

That? Well, I think that was pretty real, pretty visceral. Probably a portal into what that locker room was like immediately following another crushing loss. They're becoming experts at losing football games and football games that they seemingly, you know, had their thumb on the pulse of and were in control of. I mean, Kyle Pitts, he's never done that before. Kirk Cousins look better than he's looked in forever. And that's on a short week. Coming off of a performance over the weekend where he looked particularly washed and beat up. Yeah, they've got issues all over the place. It was an elite run defense for about the first 10 weeks of the season. It's. It's really slipped. They have not been able to defend running backs in this, in the passing game at all this year. That showed up again, you know, getting Mike Evans back was huge. They had a downfield thrust. They could do, you know, an interception and could have thrown some other ones that I'm sure he'd walk back. I think Baker Mayfield is, is way more injured than, than we're probably aware of. And they look like a team with an Injured psyche. A wounded psyche. They hit Carolina twice. I mean, those are playoff.

[A]

Games. Yes.

[E]

Yes. I'm not one of those people who can just say, well, Tampa's always won it, so, you know, since Brady got there, so they're just going to win it. This version of them seems hardwired for self destruction in critical moments of these games. I don't know, man. Carolina, look, Carolina could lose to New Orleans this weekend. Like, this league in that division is pretty out there. But the way they lost, I mean, to have the Falcons come back here, I mean, it was like 3rd and 28. I mean, it's just. Or whatever it was. I mean, all those conversions at the end by Kirk Cousins at this stage of his career, the guy nobody wanted at the trade deadline. I don't know. It's. They're obviously off, and Todd Bowles obviously knows that. That mentally they're off, and I don't know if they could get that back in the.

[A]

Can. So we had Booger McFarland on yesterday, of course, famously.

[E]

Played.

[A]

Yes. In Tampa, and he said, look, Todd Bowles is a defensive coach and their defense isn't any good. He said this on the air. The defense just isn't any good. He wasn't talking about the offense. And he said, if you have a defensive coach, your defense has to be better than this. And the other thing, Baker Mayfield, I saw a quote today, said, this is on me. It's my fault. I am completely responsible. I know what you're saying about him being hurt. Do you think it's possible he's done there in Tampa and we'll have to go somewhere.

[E]

Else? No, I'd be surprised. That would. That would surprise.

[G]

Me. I.

[E]

Mean. And who are you, like, are you trading for Kyler Murray or something? And, you know, that's kind of. I mean, he's. He's like Baker without all the things Baker's turned himself into in terms of leadership and galvanizing and guys running through walls for you, but with some of the same physical limitations. No, I. I think. I don't think he's. I don't think he's physically able to do some of the things, many of the things even perhaps consistently that he's done when he's at.

[A]

The. So you would equate him to Lamar Jackson at the.

[E]

Moment? Well, I mean, I'm being limited, I think. Yeah, I think there's some. I think there's some similarities there. And, yeah, in terms of Tampa's defense, I mean, it's the most tepid version of their pass rush we've seen in a while. Yeah, as I mentioned, the run defense has really slipped the last five or six weeks. They seem to have a fragile psyche in the clutch, which, you know, wasn't the case and Baker was kind of their dog and they were winning fourth quarters, you know, and all that stuff. So it's going to be hard to get that back in the.

[A]

Can. It is remarkable to me how things flip in a year. Yeah, Tampa Bay started out like 4 and 1 or something like this year and now they're losing all the close games. Kansas City won every one score game last year, 11. And oh, they lost them all this year. Washington had a great surprising uplift last year and now they're down on the ground, you know, I mean, New England won four games, now they're going to win 14. So yeah, it's really something. Well, let me get to the story that Dan Byrne writes about your expectations. You have expectations, first of all, that Philip Rivers will play. And if he plays, what, what, what's going to happen?

[E]

Hmm. I don't think you go through all this to have him sit in your meeting rooms. I mean, they obviously were in a desperate situation and I know they reached out to some other people too. And so you're, you're, you're doing that because you think that this guy might be able to give you more than a beat up Riley Leonard. So I, I don't think it's going to take much for them to get a look at that now, how long they stick with it, how feasible this is. I mean, it's like you just mentioned, it's a crazy week. It's often hard to, to predict. But I don't, I don't have expectations here. He's, I mean, Seattle's no joke. That defensive minded head coach is no joke. That defense is no joke. And he's not the only person kind of being forced into duty because of injury. I mean, sauce Gardeners hurt now. Deforest Proctors hurt like there's becoming increasingly less there there with the Indianapolis Colts. So I don't know how much Philip Rivers can salvage literally, you know, coming off the farm or whatever. I know he's coaching high.

[A]

School. There are people who are over, you know, Aaron Rodgers is 41 or whatever he is. He's been playing every day. Joe Flacco's got to be close to 40, 41, but he plays all the time. I mean, he's in, he's in the NFL. He warms up, he practices, he plays this Guy hasn't played in 1800 days. I just. I actually worry about him being hurt.

[E]

Badly. That's absolutely a possibility. I'm sure there was a level of discourse with his loved ones that involve some of those.

[G]

Factors.

[E]

Yeah. I mean, it's not even like Teddy Bridgewater, who's been playing every year for a long time and hasn't had to do much to back up, you know, and he was coached in high schools last year and he came back. Like he's been in camps recently. Like he's been a part of at least a scout team, NFL practices recently. I mean, this is really, like I said, walking off the farm or whatever. I. I think it's. It's fraught with peril. I don't think that they have much of a chance to win this football game. Whether or not the Seahawks cover a line that money keeps pouring on in on, I should say, remains to be seen. Yeah, I mean, this has the potential to look pretty ugly. It really.

[A]

Does. I don't. I've not heard a single.

[E]

Person. I don't know how that's going to.

[A]

Go. I haven't heard any person that I. That has been asked about this, especially former players think this is a good idea. They're. They're all. They live in dread of what could happen to Rivers. They.

[E]

Do. So, yeah. I mean, again, what kind of shape is he in? How much can he protect himself? How stripped down is the game plan and how quickly might they just. I mean, the other thing is, you don't. Like, they just had Jonathan Taylor run the ball 32 times a few weeks back against Atlanta. He hasn't quite been the same since then. Like, what do they. How do they manage this game? If this is as bad as we think it could look, I mean, is the answer. Then let's just hand it off to Taylor a million times or do they start taking other people off the field and they are in the thick of a playoff push, but they're also in a free fall. Yeah, there's life comes at you fast, man. As you said, in this.

[A]

League. Yeah, yeah, it's okay. Let me shift gears. I think Joe Burrow is the best quarterback in football. That's just me. Wilburn laughs at me and says all he is is a passer. Okay, fine. You know, fine. But he seems unhappy. He. His public comments seemed to me to be very NBA like, like, you know, NBA players, they say these things and then the next thing you know, Kevin Durant is saying, I got to get out of here. Kevin. Kevin Durant's always got to get out of here. He's always going somewhere else. This felt to me like a Kevin Durant moment. What is Joe Burrow's future with the Bengals and the.

[E]

League? Well, I've long said and long written that he's not Bengal lifer. Like this is just he and Mike Brown or the Brown family, Katie Blackburn or whomever. I don't think he spends his entire career in their employ. And I know he just did an extension not that long ago and that was always going to happen. But I don't know if there's a third contract. And he wears his emotions on his sleeve quite a bit. And he's talked openly in the past. It's not the first time that he's invoked his football mortality. Far from it. In fact, probably about a year ago at this time on my radio show, we went and just looked back at all the procedures he's had since he's got to Ohio State and he's being cut open all the time. And I think that has worn on him. And the fact that he's come back from so many injuries and then had what he came back to not be the caliber of what to be reasonably expected to win big in the NFL and how small his margins are and for and he's also a guy too who, you know, last year talked about, hey, we can keep all these free agents and still make money. Like I've got a plan. I'm studying the contracts. I know how the CBA works. I know how the salary cap. He was doing the radio row thing a year ago at this time, basically begging to keep everybody together. I think also smart enough to look at their depth charts on defense and look at how far removed from where they need to be and how slim the margins remain and feel like he's banging his head against the wall. Yes, they kept our offensive guys, but our defense somehow got worse and it was already pits. I I think he is someone who's probably not going to play till he's 40. He's not going to be doing the Phillip Rivers off the farm thing. I think he probably already knows maybe how many more years he wants to play. And I don't personally think he sees himself as doing all that with the Bengals because I'm not sure that he believes in his heart that they're ever going to win as badly as he wants to.

[A]

Win. Okay, that, yeah, it's good to know. Let me shift gears. Your hometown Baltimore Orioles signed Pete Alonso. What does it.

[E]

Say? Yeah, how about that it's what, you know, hey, it's, it's what real organizations do. They have someone of some caliber who's proven things in Major league Baseball, who hits the post most every day. You want them in your lineup every day. And he makes, he makes real money. He makes, you know, he makes more than what arbitration says he makes or, you know, he makes more than 13 million on a one year deal. Yeah, it's huge for Gunnar Henderson, it's huge for Jordan Westberg and Adlie Rutchman and everybody else who's been sort of trying to be their leader or their, their anchor, but you know, have struggled with, with the weight of that responsibility. Everybody knows whose clubhouse it is now. Everybody knows who's relied on the most to hit in the clutch and be that run producer, be that guy who hits the big home run in a close and late situation. Not that he's the only one, but he's now being, being paid and recognized at a level that nobody else from outside that organization has been in a long time. It also cannot be the end of what they're doing. I don't think it will be the end of what they're doing. But this was his choice, which also matters. This wasn't a waiver claim that turned out real well for them or a trade where the guy had no choice. He's still arbitration eligible and that's where he plays now. This is someone who could have gone elsewhere, who chose to come here. So I think that realigns a lot of things for this organization and takes a lot off some other people's shoulders. So yeah, it's, it's a, it's a much needed step in the right.

[A]

Direction. That's good. Okay, plug one A bet for.

[E]

Us. You guys who maybe are inclined to sports wager a little bit or a few extra bucks to add to the entertainment purposes of the games you're watching. There's a pretty good chance that either I or my guy, beltway Ben hall have a thought about that game and maybe probably place the wager on that game. We try to distill all our work down to about 30 minutes a day where we tell you our favorite plays across all sports. NFL, NBA, college sports, various soccer markets, wnba. In season, we're handicapping it all pretty much seven. Well, definitely not pretty much. No qualifiers, seven days a week. And trying to help you guys come up with different strategies, different ways to find the value that you can extract from these sports books that have the deck stacked in their favor. You get all of Our content video audio@warner betwithus.com.

[A]

Okay. Thank you, Jason. Let's hope there's lobster for everyone. Jason Lock. And for boys and girls, we will come back, we hope with James Carville and Jeff Ma. We know we got Jeff Ma. Where you hope we have James Carville. I'm Tony Kornheiser. You're listening to the Tony Kornheiser show. Well, you wake up in the.

[B]

Morning.

[E]

Boy you hear the ding dong ring. Then you look upon the table.

[A]

Bar. You see the same darn.

[E]

Thing. You find no food upon the table.

[A]

Bar. There's no fork up in the.

[E]

Pan. But you better not complain, boy.

[A]

You get in trouble with the man and the midnight's bed. This is the great version of Midnight Special. Even better than Johnny Rivers version. This is Paul Evans and it plays in James Carville. And this week's picks with James Carville and Jeff Ma are brought to you by FanDuel Sportsbook. Make every moment more before we get to the picks. I know, I know you said you were burning your degrees from lsu. I understand that. But in your heart LSU is still dominating, I'm sure. What do you think of Lane Kiffin being the coach at.

[E]

Lsu? Well, first of all, he's a successful coach. Okay. So we're going to start there. It's a reasonable lead that he's going to be successful at lsu. My problem with LSU is the governor now runs the.

[A]

School.

[E]

Yeah. And the reason that Lane Giffen is there because the governor told athletic director to fire the basketball coach and hire will rate. And he said, governor, I don't do that. I gave the guy three year contract and he's improving, you know, unless he Ray is in a year. So then he ran our president out who went to be president of Rutgers, which is According to US News, the 41st best university in the entire United States. And he hired his friend from Magnees, which according to US news is the 80th best regional university in the south. So he wanted to hire the basketball coach. And the president and the board we have is utterly spineless. And he's, he's now running the university. And in my opinion, he's going to run it right in a.

[A]

Ditch. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. So we move off.

[E]

That. But Lane Kiffin is. Look, LSU football is going to be fine. We're probably sixth, seventh wealthiest athletic department in the country. We won three national championships this year. Of course he said he was going to let Trump pick the football coach. Well, if John Bell was governor and he said I'm going to let Barack Obama pick the basketball coach. I would have had the same.

[A]

Reaction. Yeah. And fairly so. Fairly so. You can't do.

[G]

That.

[A]

Yeah. By the way, the LSU women's basketball team scores 100 every single time. They beat people by 80.

[E]

Scores. Let me tell you, Ms. Kim, she's a she. She's one tough lady. These women are playing really, really well. The baseball team is always going to be top five. They were always good gymnastics team the same way. We had five national championships in this.

[A]

Century.

[E]

Yeah. Not many schools do.

[A]

That. All.

[E]

Right. But thanks to. We got a new athletic director, Jeff Landry. Thank you. And also the new provost, Jeff Landry. Thank.

[A]

You. Okay. You did okay last week. You were 2 and 2 last week. You may have. You may have stemmed the bleeding here, but you.

[E]

Got. At first you got to level it and then you got to rise.

[A]

Right? That's right. That's.

[E]

Right. This.

[A]

Week. What do you.

[E]

Got? This is the week. This is the week we go rise. The Bears. Yeah, right. They are. Who they fighting this.

[A]

Week?

[D]

Cleveland. Yeah.

[E]

Cleveland. Cleveland. Cleavage. Okay. Seven and a half by the hook. Take the.

[A]

Bears. Take the Bears.

[E]

Okay. In a huge game. The Bills are hosting the.

[A]

Patriots. No, no, it's the other way around. It's in New England. It's in New.

[E]

England. All right, it's in. But weirdly, it's a kind of pick them.

[A]

Game.

[E]

Yeah. And I'm going to take.

[A]

Buffalo. Yeah. Buffalo played very well last week in Cincinnati. They came.

[E]

Back. Yeah. And the Rams are playing.

[A]

Detroit.

[E]

Yes. In Los.

[A]

Angeles. Yes.

[E]

Yes. Lay five and a.

[A]

Half. Big number. You'll still do it. You'll.

[E]

Take. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Okay. And the Steelers, they are.

[A]

Miami. No, no, they're in Pittsburgh. And the weather is supposed to be pretty cold, which doesn't usually help.

[E]

Miami. Right. And I said I would take Pittsburgh minus.

[A]

Three. You're going to do that. All right, Good. All right, good luck and we will talk to you next.

[E]

Week. We'll be back with more because we're going to be. Some of these bowl games are easy pickings. It just wasn't much this.

[A]

Weekend.

[E]

Yeah. Army. Navy. But we didn't come. What's the line on Army? Navy.

[D]

Guy? I want to say it's Navy by six. Let me check real.

[A]

Quick. Navy had a very good year. I think Navy only lost two games.

[D]

Yeah. Navy. Navy minus.

[A]

Six.

[E]

Yeah. Okay. Well, I'm a watch. I love watching that.

[A]

Game. It's.

[E]

Great. Might be corny. You know, it don't count for anything. But I love to see.

[A]

It. No, when they walk in. When they walk in. It's great. All right, we'll talk next week. Thank you, James Best at home. James Carville, boys and girls. And now, through the magic of having taped last night, now we're going to give you Jeff Ma. Okay, so we have Jeff Ma on the phone. And just before I get to Jeff, I have to say one of. We kept Jeff waiting, which I don't like to do, because we made an agreement that we would actually, in all full disclosure, this is being taped on Thursday night. So we said because it's easier for Jeff, because Jeff lives in California, you don't want to wake him up at 5:30 in the morning. So I said I would do it at X time and at x time minus 1. I got a call from Kerry Alexander, who was Mitch Albom's assistant for a thousand years. And I had agreed to do Mitch does Jeff. He does a telethon, a radiothon actually, for about 15 straight hours in Detroit and raises a tremendous amount of money and he is a dear friend. So I had to. I had to do that and be thoroughly embarrassed. As Mitch describes our conversations, he says, our conversations go like this. I say, tony, how are you? And Tony says, I'm old. And then Tony says, mitch, you're a great person and I'm a bad person. And then that's essentially the conversation. And then we veered off just a little bit. And I. I don't know that I upset him, but I did what any sports person would do, what Jeff would do, what any sports person would do because he's in Detroit. I said, what is going on with the football team at the University of Michigan? Right? And as Mitch said, we picked a bad day to do a radio thon, didn't we? We picked a bad day. So anyway, you would have done the same thing, right, Jeff? You would have said, what's going on at Michigan?

[G]

Right. It's pretty hard not to mention that. But I always leave it to you, I mean, don't worry about bumping me because I always leave it to you to put me in my.

[A]

Place. Well, there is that great history. So you. Do I understand this correctly, that the new general manager, I don't know what the actual term is, with the Washington Nationals, Paul Tabone, who was with the Red Sox. Are you.

[G]

Pals? We're not pals, but we're definitely acquaintances. And December 15th of 2016, a young assistant scouting director with the Red Sox named Paul Dabone reached out to Me, me randomly on Twitter and said I work out of Boston. We'll be in the San Francisco area for the next two weeks. You live in sf Wright, Let me know if you're available to grab a coffee or a beer over the next couple weeks. Would love to pick your brain on a couple things. Gave me a cell phone number and his email address and we met up for some drinks and have had a really great time together. He's invited me to a bunch of things and we've stayed in touch.

[A]

Since. Did he know you originally from the water polo team at.

[G]

Mit? Yeah, he wanted to pick my brain on the merit of speedos versus jammer shorts. No, I mean he, I assume that he knew me from the blackjack lore and you know, knew me from my Twitter personality. And he was, you know, at that time, obviously. I mean, he's still very young, but he was young relatively early in career, intellectually curious and, you know, I have very great hopes for what he's going to do for your beloved baseball.

[A]

Team. Well, as do we all. He came in here, he fired everybody. I mean, he totally cleaned house. I don't think he kept anybody at all. And those people, some of whom I know, were understandably chagrined at that. But what they will also say is, look, it's his team now and he should bring in all the people that he wants to bring in. And then he brought in a manager even younger than him. I mean, he's a 35 year old general manager. He brought in a 33 year old manager, is going to be younger, I guess than some of the players and younger than my children. And it's just it. That's, you know, I hope that works. You know what I mean? I hope that's the key to making everything better. To look at it with a different attitude and a younger attitude. What, what is your sense of.

[G]

Him? I mean, like I said, I mean, I think he's part of the new era of, you know, baseball. GM certainly obviously embraces analytics, but everyone, I think in leadership roles does now looks for, you know, alternate approaches to things. I think one of the things that the Red Sox organization has done quite well and you know, they've taken an analytics approach to things like improvement. Right. And if you think about one of like the first funny lessons in Moneyball, the original book is Billy Beane kind of like seemed fixated on the idea that players were who they were and they couldn't improve. And I think we think one of the major areas where analytics can help is helping Players get better. And you see this in a lot of the organizations that are successful now. They take organizational approach to using analytics to measure people getting better. The Red Sox have worked with a guy named Kyle Bode from a company called Drive Line, and he's the guy largely responsible for baseball players throwing the ball as fast as they do because he read a study on how javelin play. Javelin people get to throw further and it's by throwing underweighted and underweighted balls. And he's used that same sort of training regimen to make pitchers throw harder. And he's a fascinating guy to learn about because he's really been the one that has driven a lot of, you know, the idea of why, why player baseball players are throwing in, in the hundreds.

[A]

Now. I mean, I suspect that I speak for people of a certain generation that I like. Look, analytics are a great tool to help. What I don't like is when I see a manager or a general manager make an automatic assignment assumption, get so and so out of the game right here, you know, go out and put somebody else in right now. And because I think that there's sort of a conflict between analytics and the eye test, you know, if you want to sort of have a field manager sense of what's going on. And sometimes analytics overwhelms that. And so I think it's sort of a balance to.

[G]

You. Well, the only way I say counter to that is the reason that you have analytics is that as humans, we're incredibly prone to biases. And our biases are caused by, like, what we see and what we want to see or what we believe we're seeing. So the problem with generally, like, manager decisions is that ultimately, if you're making a very subjective decision on feel without data behind it, you're going to be prone to biases. And there are many biases that we have, whether it's something like confirmation bias, which is something like where we, we want to believe something that, you know, that confirms the belief we've had going in. You know, like, let's say you're like, oh, this pitcher is great. He can, you know, we know he can go into the eighth inning. You're always going to be thinking like, oh, he's going to go into the eighth inning and you're not going to be looking at the data, right? Because ultimately the only way over a long amount of time, and again, like, maybe Wilbur and I can have a debate about this, but the only way to make great decisions over a long course of time is to do it based on data. Because otherwise, again, as humans, we just can't make. We can't divorce ourselves from our emotions. We can't divorce ourselves from being, you know, prone or like, biased to something we believe or want to happen or something we've recently seen happen. So I would disagree with you on.

[A]

That. That's a fair point. Yeah, you make a fair point. You do. You.

[E]

Do. So that's the gist of.

[A]

It. I should say that to Wilbon right after I used the word shut up already with this. Okay. And for all of that, you were two and three last week. You never lose. You lost last week. You're 42, 29 and 1. I told you not to bet the Jets. I told you, don't bet the Jets.

[G]

Right. I mean, they still, still, even though they got blown out, were, you know. Yeah. Who knows? I'm not going to argue with you. Don't bet the.

[A]

Jets. Let's just leave it at that.

[E]

Okay. All.

[A]

Right. What do you got for.

[G]

Us? I'm going to take the Patriots plus the one over the Bills. The Patriots are probably the Most disrespected, what, 11 and two team in the.

[A]

League?

[G]

Yes. And it's because they played such a soft schedule. But, you know, this is an area where I think they can beat Buffalo and they, they're coming off of a buy. They've certainly been ready for this. Buffalo's coming off of a pretty difficult game against Cincinnati that required a lot out of them. And Josh.

[A]

Allen.

[G]

Yes. At home getting a point. Just got to go.

[A]

With. I'm going to give you a point and a half. That's what we've got, a point and a half. So that helps you give it a point and a half. All.

[G]

Right. If I call Carville, will he give me.

[A]

More? I'll give you.

[D]

10. Yes, probably.

[E]

8. Give you.

[A]

10. What.

[G]

Else? I'm going to take the Bengals plus the two and a half over Baltimore last week. One of the things I stumbled on was the belief in this Baltimore team. And the problem with this is that all the data now shows that Lamar Jackson is not.

[A]

Healthy. No, he's.

[G]

Not. I think we can't underplay how important he is to the team and how important he is when he's healthy. A lot of these ratings on Baltimore are based on him being healthy and it doesn't seem like he.

[A]

Is. He is not the Lamar Jackson that we have seen for the last X amount of years. He's clearly not. Now, are you troubled at all by Joe Burrow coming out today? And basically talking about his own.

[G]

Unhappiness. No, I mean, I think ultimately that's, that's, you know, a narrative that that's going to be baked in here. I mean, Burrow is, you know, this is a game that, you know, I'm.

[A]

Not.

[G]

Okay. It's just a.

[A]

Soundbite.

[G]

Okay.

[A]

But. All.

[G]

Right. I'm not going to try to probe into his.

[A]

Psyche. Okay. What.

[G]

Else? I'm going to take the Saints plus the two and a half over Carolina. Really? Saints are. Yeah, Saints are just this, their quarterback, their rookie shop. He looks, he looks like he's going to be a reasonable starting quarterback in the league. Got some athleticism. Still kind of down on this Carolina team. Despite their.

[A]

Record. They've been great lately. They've been like, Bryce Young has been really, really good. Like they've, they've beaten good. They beat the Rams.

[G]

Right? Yeah. I'm still going to take the two and a half year because I think over the course of the season, you know, they are what they.

[A]

Are.

[G]

Okay. I'm gonna take the Lions plus the six and a half over the Rams. Just a case where the line's a little bit too high and you know, Lions offense, you know, when healthy, can score on.

[A]

Anyone. Yes. Yeah, the Lions. I would say now that we are 3/4 of the way through the season. The Lions are one of the biggest disappointments to me because I think they're really good, you know, and it's great that they win games after they lose games, but they lose too many games, you know, and they're in a tough division and it's possible if they don't win this, it's possible they don't make the playoffs. Right there on. They're on the outs right now. I think the Lions. I don't understand that. You got another one? You got just.

[E]

Four. No, that's.

[A]

Five. I got Patriots, I've got Bengals, I've got New Orleans. I've got.

[G]

Detroit. Sorry, Bronco. Bronco. Plus the two over Green.

[A]

Bay. Really? Denver plus two over Green.

[D]

Bay. Well, actually, give that to you. I feel like, plus two and a.

[A]

Half. Give you a.

[G]

Half. Okay, sounds good. I feel like my son right now because I just watched my 8 year old son go out in the spelling bee and he claims that he had the word correctly written on his sheet. He just reread it back incorrectly. So that's what I just did. I just missed that. Missed.

[A]

That. You missed that. So. But you're, you're taking the two most surprising teams in the AFC right now are the Patriots in Denver. They have the most wins in the afc. You're taking both of those against, you know, high class competition. Right. I just want to make.

[G]

Sure. Okay, well, they're again, they're both like road, sorry, home.

[A]

Underdog.

[E]

Yes. And they are.

[G]

The. They're, you know, they are what they are this year, which has both been pretty good. So I'm going to take my.

[A]

Chances. Okey dokey. Who's on BET the process this.

[G]

Week we have a guy the name of John Reader who does a podcast called the Risk of ruin podcast, which is one of the best podcasts talking about people that are what we call advantage players. So people that try to do all these things to tilt the odds in their favor, like professional card counters, etc. It's a very interesting.

[A]

Episode. Okay, what am I being handed? Okay, here we go. This week's picks with James Carville and Jeff Ma have been brought to you by FanDuel Sportsbook. Make every moment more. I gotta be able to do that because that's how we make money. Thank you.

[G]

Jeff. Thanks.

[A]

Tony. Okay. And we will come back with email and jingle and I am Tony Kornheiser. This is the Tony Kornheiser show. That is the Zama Z a m a Zama middle school guitar class in Japan. In Japan, someone is listening to us and convincing kids this is a good thing to learn to play on the guitar and doing. Maybe Remnant could learn to play. Maybe he could learn to play.

[D]

Way. Just love that version. It's so.

[A]

Lovely. Yeah. Yeah. You want to do the Bethesda bagel ad.

[D]

Please? Hot.

[A]

Bagels. Oh, I didn't.

[D]

Okay. So lovely to walk on a cold morning holding a bag of hot bagels next to.

[A]

You.

[D]

Good. Yeah. Bethesda bagels, we love them. You will as well. Just go to Bethesda Bagels.com for the location in the DC area near.

[A]

Stew. Then pop on in and you'll be thrilled. Before we get to the mailbag, let me just say there must be some word today from my girlfriend so far away please, Mr. Postman look and see if there's a letter a letter from me I've been standing here waiting Mr. Postman so patiently for just a card or just a letter saying she's returning home to me so you changed it into a boy singing so like the.

[D]

Beatles. It was the Beatles in my.

[A]

Head. Right. Even. But even though. Please, Mr. Postman is the Marvelettes.

[E]

Yes. Girl.

[A]

Group.

[D]

Okay. Well, I think it was either today or yesterday in 1961. They got the first number one hit for for Motown.

[A]

Motown. Yeah.

[D]

Yeah. Great.

[A]

Song. Thanks to our guest today, Jason Lock and for James Carville. Jeff Ma. Thanks as well to today's sponsors. Remember, you can listen to us on Apple podcasts Spotify and Odyssey. If you get the show through Apple, please leave us a review. Here's one Kurt Chris Strong Dear Mr. Tony, longtime little first time writer, fellow Rehoboth member. Like you, I'm now at the age where MRIs are becoming far too routine and far too claustrophobic. The last time I slid into that glorified submarine tube, I remember a story I once read about Major James Neesmith, which you may know. Before being captured in Vietnam, Neesmith was a solid average golfer, a low 90s guy. During seven years as a POW in a tiny cage, he kept himself sane by playing 18 holes every day, visualizing every sight, sound and swing in full detail. When he was finally released, physically weakened, no practice in years, he went out and shot 74, 20 strokes better than ever before. So now whenever I'm stuck in an mri, I borrow a page from the major. I play around in my head. I can hear Michael jumping in here to confirm the value of visualization as legitimate technique. The best part, Inside the mri, my drives never find a bunker, my approaches always hold the green, and I never three putt. Isn't that a lovely.

[C]

Email? Don't run out of golf.

[A]

Balls. Yeah, you don't from. Which reminds me, I have a. A box of Binghamton golf balls. It's. They're Bridgestone. You use Bridgestone. I'd like to give you some of these because I'm just going to hit them into a pond. You know, I'm gonna lose them pretty.

[C]

Quick. Just lose them in the.

[A]

Rough. You know I don't like to lose things in the.

[C]

Rough. Yeah, but you spread the knowledge of the school. Yeah, but it's a public ivy. Come on, leave him in the.

[A]

Fairway. Jake Lloyd Hi Grandpa Tony. I'm sorry to hear you had a not pleasant experience with your mri. I frequently have the opportunity to work with patients and their MRI scans. I am a cardiac device specialist for the University of Utah Hospital. I assist patients with pacemakers and defibrillators, getting MRI scans through reprogramming and other hocus pocus junk to keep them safe while also working towards getting diagnostic results to improve their lives. Most of my patients are nervous prior to their scans. A few tidbits I'd like to share to calm their nerves are the some older MRI Rooms, including some in our hospital, have to be lined with copper to block out radio waves which may come from other places in the hospital. These radio waves would affect the quality of scan. Scientists originally used magnetic resonance to measure the density and makeup of objects in space. The Voyager probes were equipped with tools to measure the same magnetic fields that were used to scan your back. The spinning magnet inside the machine spins so fast and can generate so much heat that it must be cooled with liquid helium, which usually runs around minus 270 degrees. Not even the Lily Hammer jacket could keep you warm from that. Thank you for the countless hours of entertainment, giving us all a glimpse into the life of a grumpy old bald man. I'd like to be the official cardiac device specialist. Sure, sure. And a big leches re to my father David, who introduced me to PTI when I was in middle school. So that's really. That's nice. I mean, I. I think everybody has the same I again, I didn't say it was unpleasant. I said it was not pleasant. There's a difference. Yes, there is, rick. Fran Sosa Episode 252 we know what that means. In Cincinnati, your Miri starry story hit close to home. Until June of this year, I had spent nearly 73 years without having to spend time in the tube due to various breakdowns in my aging body. I've had three MRIs in the last six months, all in the tube. From what I have learned, once they stuff earplugs in your ear, they slap on the low budget headphones. They could be playing Baby Shark and I would not have.

[E]

Known. Yeah, you.

[A]

Can'T. Can't hear anything. I started the first MRI requesting Steely Dan, only to find out that this $2.5 billion health care conglomerate cannot afford a Spotify subscription. So after reeling in the ears, there was a tire commercial, an insurance commercial, followed by the Doobie Brothers, Kenny Loggins, and the Captain into Neil. By the time I had my third mri, I came up with a system. I asked how long the procedure was going to be, divided that by 3. The average length of a rock song. I didn't need to count to 100 multiple times just to count muffled songs coming through the headphones and earplugs. And it worked like a charm. From Eric Robbins in Silver Spring, Maryland. Hearing about the trials and tribulations with your MRI reminded me that sometimes these things, surface issues no one was ever looking for. I recently had an MRI done for diverticulitis related symptoms. While there were no extraneous factors with that condition. Imagine my surprise when they told me my L5 vertebrae had slipped over the S1 below and an obvious reason for an ongoing back problem. And I have a 7 millimeter non obstructing stone lodged in my left kidney. God help me if that big rock ever breaks loose. Please tell my gastroenterologist. Eat it. So you know, I never sort of expect these reactions when I tell these stories. I never know if anyone is.

[D]

Listening. Got a big one on this.

[A]

One. Yeah. Tim Wildsmith Our friend in Nashville, Tennessee I have the first full on panic attack of my life inside an MRI tube a few years ago when I had to have another one. About a year later I had the first Valium of my life. Who's this from? It doesn't have it just says take care. Jennifer Swarth I'm a radiologist in San Antonio, Texas. I've been watching PTI since I went to med school in New York City over 20 years ago. Of course, Mets games also got me through med school because they were able to keep me awake, but boring enough that I could pay attention to my studies at the same time as watching them. Now I listen to Mr. Tony's podcast while I read MRIs of the joints and spine from my office. Not implying anything about the excitement level of the podcast of course, although I am sorry to hear that Mr. Tony found the MRI unpleasant. No, no, no, not pleasant. I completely understand as I have had to have them yearly myself. But the MRI he is describing was likely performed on a standard 1.5 Tesla magnet which are much stronger and when operated properly should offer much better imaging quality than the open extremity magnets which he used for his leg MRI. Those magnets are less than 1 Tesla and this can't be Tesla like Tesla Tesla, can it? And the imaging quality tends to be fairly poor. Like many things, both the quality of the MRI itself and the quality of the doctor reading it, as well as the quality of the technologist performing it matter a lot in the quality of information you get back. But a well performed MRI can offer a ton of important information. Although they aren't kind to the claustrophobic, the size of the magnets do continue to increase in size and they do not use radiation. Hoping to be the official orthopedic radiologist at the show. By the way, I have United Health Insurance and still have to argue with an insurance company every year to get my MRI done as well, even as a doctor and a radiologist. Brett Hobbs Linton, Indiana when my friends describe their uncomfortable MRI experiences they invariably ask if I share their discomfort. I have to be honest, getting an MRI does not bother me in the least. And here is the reason. Joining the Navy in my teens and training for a submarine completely eliminated any potential claustrophobia. Sleeping in a very confined bunk where I barely had room to turn over made the MRI machine feel positive spacious. As for the constant rhythmic pounding when you've slept in an environment where the hull is perpetually creaking and groaning under the pressure of deep dives, the noise from an MRI is nothing. It simply lulls me right to sleep. Wow, that's great. Tell Ryan Grove and Lee panicked to eat it. Steve in Minnesota, after hearing about your harrowing time harrowing time getting an MRI the other day, I wanted to let you know there are people like me for which the hum of the MRI enclosed in nature of the tube does something that just puts us to the sleep I've spent six hours getting MRIs for various issues and have been conscious for maybe 10 minutes of them. Oh wow, that's fortunate. That is very like Wilbur gets on a plane, goes to sleep before it takes off. Before it takes off, goes to sleep, sleeps all the way through. Even 20 hours sleeps all the way. It's unbelievable. Learn behavior Charlie Burt Springfield, Virginia According to the Google bot, Cigna completed the sale of its Medicare related business to Health Care Service corp. HCSC in March 2025. The sale was not expected to disrupt customer coverage for customers because there is none. And while HCSC has now acquired the businesses, Cigna's Ever North Health Services will continue to provide pharmacy and other services to the former Cigna Medicare businesses for a period. In other words, HCSC has customers, swipes, cash and Evernorth. Even villains earn riches now over Reginald, Tony and the Hammer are now here to better serve you. Now if you please just provide your credit. Clay Mason, the official private investigator of this show, Clay Mason Associates I realized when you mentioned the great Mark Tuohy on Monday that I had a David Aldridge moment. Years ago, the late 80s with him. He was representing a defense contractor in a huge case. I was part of my previous life as an FBI agent. I was across from him in a negotiation at the U.S. attorney's Virginia office. An assistant U.S. attorney was sitting behind me making harrumph sounds and Mr. Tuohy told him to stop. Stop emoting. Quieted the whole room. I love.

[D]

Mark. He's the.

[A]

Best. Steve Rebhan Battle Creek, Michigan. Isn't that where Battle Creek, Michigan. Gerald Ford from Battle Creek.

[D]

Michigan. I'll Check that. You're very good at this, so.

[A]

I don't doubt you from Battle Creek. I think this the cereal companies from Battle Creek.

[D]

Michigan.

[A]

Kellogg? I think so. I think so. Steve Revin Listening to the email regarding the teenage wine thieves, I had my first David Aldridge moment. Hey, I know that attorney. I played golf with that attorney. Attorney. A solid single digit golfer, Mr. Tim Livingston plays fast, plays well and has no shortage of entertaining stories from his career as a defense attorney. Unfortunately, our host at the Battle Creek Country Club, Dr. John Chadwick, is an acquired taste. Well, he's killing a guy, he's killing a club member. Here's a haiku for aging out in digital wallets. Unless you are dead. Logical next step is tapioca, Sir. Chris Band sells Forest Hill, Maryland I'm 45. I once threw out my back reaching for a tissue. Godspeed, Philip Rivers. Godspeed, Matt Little in Pearl, Mississippi. Top 17% TK show listener here. Chuck and Roxy number still unknown until Michael used the word patina on Monday. Monday's pod. The only other time I can verify hearing the word was by Tom Wilkinson's character in the Greatest American Movie Ever Made, Michael Clayton. Of course, Arthur was using it in a much less pleasant.

[D]

Context. By the way, I see Gerald Ford. Born in Omaha, raised in Grand.

[A]

Rapids. Grand.

[D]

Rapids. But Battle Creek is cereal.

[A]

City. Okay, all right. Mark in Camby, Indiana. It's been a long time since I've seen the trampoline bear on pti. Give the people what they want. Warren Sapp used to always ask if he was a guest that we would just play that thing. Ben Rothman, 20 time US National Champion, 2019 World Golf Croquet Champion. 2025 World Golf Croquet Team Champion. Captain who says Edith Spillman and writes Long time, first time. I am a competitive croquet player who often represents the United States team. I was the captain when we won the 2025 World Golf Croquet Team Championship. A first for the US team. And I was recently crowned the moctezuma of croquet when I won the 2025 Mexican Open in Baja California. Grand prize of 6,000 Mexican pesos. I was wondering if you had an official croquet player for the show. But I don't want it to be me. As you know, the connective tissue of the show runs deep. And I only recently realized my American teammate, an occasional doubles partner, is a fellow little. Turns out those were TK salutes all those years. He's a nine time national croquet champion and he Hit one of the best shots in US team history to help us win the 2011 Salomon Trophy against the British. He's from the DMV. Vienna, Virginia, to be exact. And he's been listening to your ramblings for even longer than I have. In his days as a bachelor, his player bio in various world championships and team events claimed he was a boat captain trolling the mighty Potomac for tuna. His initials are even dg. He goes by Doug, even though his first name is Spillman. But he doesn't use that name or want anyone to know it. So don't read that. I just read it. If you put it in here, I just read it. The Washington Post. Tara Baramfour wrote an article about his backyard tournament a few years ago. Hopefully you can grant eternal bragging rights by naming Doug Grimsley the official croquet player of the Tony.

[E]

Cornhoit. Sure. Yeah.

[A]

Sure. And the stuff I read on the air. Well, what are you going to do? Seth Becker hey, old sport. Thought you'd like to know The S&P 500 ended the day at 6886.68. That's 688668. Happy holidays. Great number. Andy Shaner, Sun Prairie, Wisconsin. During this special time of year, the season of confusing sunrise times and shifting moons, I always reflect back on the year that was it was hard to come up with a way to show gratitude for another year of smart, funny chatter from you, Michael, and the regular lineup of wonderful guests. Fortunately, I have an amazing piece of news to share that should bring you a great deal of joy and financial benefits as well. As long as Nigel doesn't flush the mouse and mess up the printer, hopefully this email won't get. And so he's saying that you. That's slick on his part. Good job, Ian. Mark Boknecht, Galena, Ohio. The Galena Road. That's right, yeah. The traffic life has come full circle. The intersection of Worthington Road and Africa Road is under construction. Again, you cannot go south on Worthington Road. All three other directions are open. And from Joe Coronia, Kansas City. You left us all. All. You left all of us littles hanging. We need to know, how did you attack the roast beef? What about the bread? White or dark? If the bread was used. Seeds or no seeds. Mustard or mayo? Are you a horseradish person? Did you just eat the roast beef? Slice by slice, standing over the sink? These are details little need to know. Basically, I just ate the roast beef in my.

[C]

Hand. Spicy mustard for.

[A]

Me. Use spicy mustard.

[C]

Boots. He had it for.

[A]

Lunch. Did he love.

[C]

It? Little mayo for him.

[A]

Yes. Did he love.

[C]

It? Loved.

[A]

It. Sean brought over Levy's Jewish rye, but without seeds. I'm a seeds guy. You're a seeds guy. I've toasted it a couple of times and put other things on it because I eat the roast beef ravenously sticking, you know, slices into my hand and just eating them. That's how I eat the roast beef. Carol last night had some, and she's not a roast beef. She's done. All right. If you're out on your bike tonight, as always, do wear.

[E]

White. Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Wednesday, Friday, Sunday.

[F]

Saturday. With Philip Rivers coming back, the Bears brought back Sid Lupman to run the old wing tee. The Lions got old Bobby Lane to sling the pigskin down the field. Elway to the Broncos. Marino to the fish. Jets fans who were praying for Joe Namath got their wish. The Colts got Peyton Manning back and Johnny Yu, too. The Vikings got Joe Cap, too, come back and play quarterback. John Hadel got to the Chargers. Pittsburgh, they got Brad Chop back. The Niners got Montana and Steve Young to both play quarterback. The Chiefs stuck with Mahomes. The Cowboys, they got Aikman. Green Bay got Bart Starr to run the packers sweep again for Norm Van Brocklin. The Eagles made a beeline. The Bengals, Kenny Anderson. The Giants, they got Eli Jer Brees went back to New Orleans. And, brother, that's no fable. The Cardinals got Kurt Warner. The Rams got Roman Gabriel Brady tore his blazer off when New England call. The Browns, they got Frank Ryan to hand Jim Brown the ball. Can't wait to see all these guys returning to the spotlight. Let's hope their O lines keep them momentarily.