“What rhymes with Bargatze?”

Summary

Podcast Summary: "The Tony Kornheiser Show" Episode “What rhymes with Bargatze?”

Release Date: March 19, 2025
Host: Tony Kornheiser
Guests: Jeff Ma, Pat Forde, Greg Garcia

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1. Introduction

The episode kicks off with Tony Kornheiser humorously referencing former board member Greg Garcia, setting a casual and engaging tone. The initial segments include brief commercial reads from Hyundai and Samsung, establishing the show's blend of sports commentary and everyday topics.

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2. NCAA Tournament Bracket Week

A significant portion of the episode centers around Bracket Week, where regular participants Jeff Ma, Pat Forde, and Greg Garcia share their NCAA Tournament picks. The discussion is dynamic, with each guest presenting their insights, strategies, and humorous takes on potential upsets.

a. Jeff Ma’s Bracket Analysis (00:00 - 19:39)

Jeff Ma initiates the bracket discussion by expressing skepticism about the Washington Wizards' performance, suggesting possible tanking for better draft positions. He emphasizes the need for NBA integrity, stating:

"If you think I'm wrong, just say you're an idiot." (00:00)

Ma highlights concerns about gambling influences in sports, insisting:

"Once the rug was pulled back on what's going on in rarely, but occasionally under the scenes, then the suspicions run rampant." (05:01)

He proceeds to analyze specific first-round upsets, expressing disappointment with the “First Four” play-in games but acknowledges exciting outcomes like the St. Francis vs. Alabama State game. Jeff confidently asserts:

"We have seen what's going on with gamblers influencing the outcomes of personal performances." (05:01)

b. Pat Forde’s Bracket Picks (19:46 - 34:31)

Pat Forde joins to share his bracket predictions, aligning closely with Jeff's thoughts on tanking and the integrity of sports leagues. He endorses Duke and Baylor to advance, predicting:

"I'm going with Duke." (07:58)

Pat also critiques the structure of postseason tournaments, pondering their legitimacy and the impact of seeding on team motivation. He speculates on potential upsets such as UCSD over Michigan and Yale over Texas A&M, demonstrating a mix of analytical and bold choices.

c. Greg Garcia’s Rhyming Bracket Picks (36:20 - 49:59)

Greg Garcia adds a creative twist to the bracket discussion by presenting his picks in rhymed verse, enhancing the episode's entertainment value. Some notable predictions include:

• Vanderbilt over St. Mary’s:

  "Vandy will lose this game but cover the spread. So I'll win my bet, see?" (38:46)

• High Point over Purdue:

  "High Point over Purdue. I think that's. We've had this anti Big Ten bias. We'll just continue that because that seems to work in the tournament now." (41:13)

• St. John’s to Win Finals:

  "St. John's will come out angry. Houston will be laid to waste." (49:20)

Greg emphasizes unpredictability in upsets, maintaining a light-hearted yet insightful approach to bracketology.

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3. Insights on Sports Betting and Ethics

Throughout the bracket discussions, the guests delve into the ethical dimensions of sports betting, particularly focusing on the NBA's potential tanking strategies and their implications for league integrity. Tony underscores the critical nature of trust in sports, remarking:

"If I'm betting that game wrecks everything. I'm betting that game." (05:25)

Jeff concurs, highlighting the damaging effects of compromised competition credibility:

"And you can't really have a league where the credibility of the competition is under suspicion." (05:25)

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4. Team and Player Highlights

The conversation frequently touches on specific teams and players, offering insights and critiques:

• Duke’s Cooper Flagg:

  "They need him clearly, for this turn. Now, they're not bad without him, but with him, they're wagon." (09:20)

• Florida's Todd Golden Controversy: The host and guests discuss Todd Golden's past allegations and their impact on Florida’s tournament chances, reflecting on the challenges of addressing off-court issues in sports.

"Florida has cleared Todd Golden. Right. Florida said, we don't see it. We're good here, but there's a lot of smoke there." (17:33)

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5. Listener Emails and Musical Segments

The episode features heartfelt listener contributions, blending personal stories with musical interludes:

• Michelle Brerman’s Song “My Favorite Year” (21:51): Michael Granberry shares an email highlighting Michelle's performance, which Shenazzes the show with an emotional and melodic pause.

• Additional Emails: Listeners like Tim Pujol and Jolene Wojic send in anecdotes and feedback, adding a community feel to the episode. Tony engages with these stories, often incorporating humor and personal reflections.

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6. Concluding Remarks and Final Picks

As the episode nears its end, the guests finalize their bracket picks, reiterating their favorite predictions and exchanging humorous banter:

• Final Four Predictions:
  • Jeff Ma leans towards Houston’s consistency and depth.
  • Pat Forde opts for Auburn’s potential to exceed expectations.
  • Greg Garcia humorously champions St. John’s, despite their less traditional standing.

"St. John's will come out angry. Houston will be laid to waste." (49:20)

Tony commends the guests for their efforts, acknowledging the complexity and fun of bracket prediction. The episode wraps up with playful mentions of prize incentives like toothpaste, adding to the show's signature blend of sports, humor, and relatability.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Tony Kornheiser on NBA Tanking:

  "Games. And I'm sorry, but once, Once the rug was pulled back on what's going on in rarely, but occasionally under the scenes, then the suspicions run rampant." (05:01)

• Jeff Ma on Sports Integrity:

  "You can't really have a league where the credibility of the competition is under suspicion." (05:25)

• Pat Forde on Tournament Structure:

  "Do these postseason tournaments even really matter? Should people even try to win them?" (27:18)

• Greg Garcia’s Rhyming Picks:

  "Vandy will lose this game but cover the spread. So I'll win my bet, see?" (38:46)

• Tony on Greg’s Effort:

  "That's so inside. That's so inside." (40:03)

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Conclusion

Episode “What rhymes with Bargatze?” offers a comprehensive and entertaining dive into NCAA Tournament bracket predictions, enriched by guest expertise, playful rhymes, and meaningful discussions on sports ethics. Tony Kornheiser skillfully balances insightful sports analysis with humor and listener engagement, making the episode both informative and enjoyable for fans and newcomers alike.

Transcript

[Tony Kornheiser]

Hey, it's Tony. We close out bracket week today with picks from Pat40, Jeff Ma and former Kornheiser show board op Greg Garcia. Wonder what he did for work after he left our show? Gonna have to ask him. But first, boys and girls, let's do some commerce. This is the Hyundai Reid. With over 120 IIHS top safety awards since 2006, Hyundai helps keep you safe on the road. Picture yourself going for a drive. What comes to mind? Potholes, lane splitting bikers, sleepy truck drivers, red light runners, distracted pedestrians crossing the road where they shouldn't. Yeah, sometimes it feels like the road is out to get you. But thankfully Hyundai's available advanced safety technology is designed to help keep you protected against the many challenges the road throws your way. With available class exclusive advanced safety features, Hyundai's are designed to help you enjoy your journey with confidence, style and above all, safety. We put your safety first, everything else second. You can change lanes with much more confidence thanks to the available Blind Spot View monitor, which actually shows you a live video feed of your blind spots. The standard forward collision avoidance assist can help prevent or mitigate accidents by alerting you of an imminent collision and automatically applying the brakes if you don't. Your Hyundai is equipped with a standard driver attention warning system which constantly monitors your attention levels. Once detected, it sounds alerts and visual cues to help bring your focus back on the road. Learn more About Hyundai@Hyundai USA.com Call 562-314-4603 for complete details. I can say to my new Samsung Galaxy S25 Ultra. Hey, find a keto friendly restaurant nearby and text it to Beth and Steve. And it does without me lifting a finger so I can get in more squats anywhere I can. 1, 2, 3, 3. Will that be cash or credit?

[Jeff Ma]

Credit.

[Tony Kornheiser]

4 Galaxy S25 Ultra. The AI companion that does the heavy lifting. So you can do. You get [e-mail] compatible with select apps. Requires Google Gemini account. Results may vary based on input. Check responses for accuracy. Previously on the Tony Kornheiser Show. At the moment, Chuck Todd does not have any SEC teams in the final four. This is my greatest conference in the world.

[Greg Garcia]

My homage.

[Tony Kornheiser]

14 teams, something like that.

[Greg Garcia]

As an ACC guy, I just. I am rooting for the SEC to crumble. But yeah, I just.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Wilbon feels the same way. And secretly I just hate them.

[Greg Garcia]

Yeah, I just.

[Tony Kornheiser]

I just hate them.

[Greg Garcia]

I have no rational view. I hate success. I root against success.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay, the Tony Kornizer show is on now. This is the third day of our brackets. We bring in people who've been with us before. We don't have a general open. Pat, 40, joins us now. I. I don't know when. When I should do this. Just let me do. Pat. Let me do one minute of a general open, and then we'll start with the brackets. The general open pretty much goes like this. The NBA should investigate the Washington Wizards for tanking a game the other night. They should investigate them. I don't think this goes as high as the owner. I'm talking. These are my opinions. I don't think it goes as high as the owner, but I think it probably goes as high as this guy, Michael Winger, who's in charge of all basketball operations for that team. They tanked that game. They played their two best players, Jordan Poole and Khris Middleton, less than 11 minutes and not a single minute in the second half. They played two other starters. Alex Sar, the overall number two pick, 22 minutes, and Keyshawn George, another starter, 18 minutes. They wanted to lose that game. They want to lose that game tonight in Utah. They want to lose that game because the. Both teams wants to lose. Yeah, both teams want to lose. Going to look like a G league game. Both teams want to lose because the loser of that game may have the inside track to the overall number one pick. And the reason I'm bringing this up, and then I'll ask Pat for his opinion on this, they definitely should be investigated for tanking and they should be fined for tanking. The reason I bring this up, and I wouldn't have brought it up 10 years ago, I wouldn't have cared if they lost 10 years ago. But I bring it up now because all of these leagues, the NBA, Major League Baseball and the NFL, have gambling partners. They spread the gospel of gambling all over the country. This is a boat race. Right, Pat? This isn't a fair game. This is not a legitimate game, and they ought to be investigated for it. And if you think I'm wrong, just say you're an idiot. Tony, it's fine.

[Jeff Ma]

No, I don't think you're wrong. I mean, I think, you know, in the, you know, race to get every penny of revenue possible, you get into some bad situations, you compromise things, and all of a sudden you've got deals with gambling companies. And we've seen what's going on with. With gamblers influencing the outcomes of personal performances.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Yes.

[Jeff Ma]

Games. And I'm sorry, but once, Once the rug was pulled back on what's going on in rarely, but occasionally under the scenes, then the suspicions Run rampant. And you can't really have a league where the credibility of the competition.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Yeah.

[Jeff Ma]

Is under suspicion.

[Tony Kornheiser]

If I'm betting that game wrecks everything. I'm betting that game. If I bet on Washington because they've been hot lately and I get whatever points is, you know, and then I see that the coach is not trying to win, he's trying to lose. He's not trying to win, then what have I done? You know, then I demand that the NBA investigate this and issue some sort of directive when it's done. All right, so I'm done with that. The. I also love how the NCAA now has gotten television networks such as ESPN to call this the first four. This is a play in game. These are play in games. They're not the first four, but two of them were played last night. North Carolina attempting to justify being in the field. I'm one of those who believes they should be in the field. I'm one of those who believes they can. They can be 30 of the teams in the field. So I'm not Wilbon screaming about how a Big Ten team should get in. But not North Carolina. They destroyed whoever they played. But in the. One of the greatest finishes ever. Ever. The St. Francis Alabama State game, where St. Francis hits two threes in the last, I don't know, 30 seconds to tie the game. And then cannot hold on to the ball. Cannot hold on to the ball. And the other team throws a Jaden Daniels hail Mary that's tapped around. Tapped around. It lands in one guy's arms, he banks it in off the board, and Alabama State wins the game. What are your thoughts on those games?

[Jeff Ma]

Yeah, I mean, I don't like the premise of the first four at all. I mean, this was, you know, a creation to simply get more not very good power conference teams into the tournament. But there have occasionally been some good games and last night was the best of them all. It's probably the best first four game we've had yet.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Yes.

[Jeff Ma]

Incredibly exciting. You know, great for Alabama State to get the exposure and win the game. Great for St. Francis to get the exposure, but crushing for them to lose the game. You know, that was. If we can get games like that the rest of March Madness, hey, we're in business. It'll be a really fun tournament. But that was. That was amazing.

[Tony Kornheiser]

It was really a fabulous game. As close all the way. St. Francis had a pretty good lead in the first half. I thought when I first got to the game, six or eight or something, like whatever it was, it was really Good game. All right, let's start with your bracket. Have you won this thing? Haven't you?

[Jeff Ma]

You've won it, I think more than once. I think I've won it like twice.

[Tony Kornheiser]

You and Spike Bruin are the only people who win. Phil's mom has not yet won. No, she has. Not yet. Not yet. Not yet. There's always a not yet. Let's start in the East Regional. Top right. Duke. Give me any upsets in the first round.

[Jeff Ma]

Okay. I've got Baylor over Mississippi State. Not much of an upset at all. Nine over eight, but an upset.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Unlike Bob Ryan who insists upsets start at 413.

[Jeff Ma]

What?

[Tony Kornheiser]

What?

[Jeff Ma]

Okay, yeah, that's a bit much. And I've got Vanderbilt over St. Mary's I'm tempted. I would wanted to pick Liberty to beat somebody, but when they drew Oregon, I couldn't do it. So those are my two upsets there.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay. And that's fair. Other people in this thing have picked vcu, by the way, just so you know. VCU and Liberty.

[Jeff Ma]

Yeah, VCU is. I don't like my bracket. I hate my bracket this year. Tony. Okay, say that. I hate my bracket. All the upsets I wanted to pick I ended up not being able to pick. And then the ones I did pick, I don't like.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Here we go. Duke, Baylor, who you got?

[Jeff Ma]

Duke easily.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay. And Oregon, Arizona.

[Jeff Ma]

Yeah, I've got Oregon there. An old Pac 12 grudge match.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay. BYU, Wisconsin.

[Jeff Ma]

That's an interesting one. And that's going to be fun. Up and down and shot making. I'm taking BYU there.

[Tony Kornheiser]

There's an upset. BYU getting into the 16s and already an SEC matchup. Vandy, Alabama, who you got?

[Jeff Ma]

Yeah, and that won't be very close. I don't think Bama will roll.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay, Duke, Oregon, Duke and byu. Alabama.

[Jeff Ma]

Yeah, and that boy, that'll really be attract me. That's going to be like 110 to 104. I'll take Alabama there and to get.

[Tony Kornheiser]

To the Final Four. Duke or Alabama, That's a good game.

[Jeff Ma]

It's a good, really good game. And there will be pressure on John Schreier to win it against a guy who has been to the Final Four. Yeah, and I'm rolling with Duke. I'm assuming that by the second weekend Cooper Flagg's ankle will be well enough that he can play at a high level and they'll have the firepower to beat Alabama.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Pat, I have watched Duke play seven or eight times this year. In every single game, Cooper Flag goes out with Something. Someone pokes him in the eye, his ankle turns, something happens. He's out for 10 to 12 minutes every game. Have you noticed that?

[Jeff Ma]

I really haven't, but I. Maybe I haven't been paying enough attention to that.

[Tony Kornheiser]

I don't know.

[Jeff Ma]

But, you know, they, they. They need him clearly, for this turn. Now, they're. They're not bad without him, but with him, they're wagon.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Yep, they're pretty good. Okay, Houston bracket. Any upsets? First round.

[Jeff Ma]

Let's see. Houston. Let's see. We've got. I've got who. Yeah, this is. This is one where I've got straight chalk where I was disappointed in myself. Like, I, I kind of wanted to pick High Point. Yeah, I didn't. I. I'm.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Purdue has. Purdue has a bad history in this tournament, but it's mostly with Zach Eady. But they have a bad history in this tournament. They do.

[Jeff Ma]

Yeah. I don't think. I think Kentucky's absolutely in the tank. They're sliding, they're injured, they're not playing well. They've overachieved in the balloon. The air is coming out of the balloon, but I can't pick Troy.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay. Okay. All right. So Houston, Gonzaga.

[Jeff Ma]

Houston.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Houston and Clemson.

[Jeff Ma]

Purdue got Clemson there.

[Tony Kornheiser]

ACC team, Illinois, Kentucky, Illinois.

[Jeff Ma]

And that again. Illinois also could lose by 20 in the first round. Duke, but that could be in the sweet.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Duke beat them by 50 points and a neutral site.

[Jeff Ma]

When they lose, it all falls apart. I mean, they are like, you know, they. The youth league team where the kids start crying on the court, fall apart. That. That becomes Illinois. When they lose, they just fall. But I'm going to guess that they get through two rounds without it.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay, ucla, Tennessee, Tennessee, Houston, Clemson, Houston. As we set up chalk here and Illinois, Tennessee, Tennessee there.

[Jeff Ma]

And then.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Yeah, and then who you got going.

[Jeff Ma]

In Houston winning the. The region. That's gonna be. That will be an absolute war.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Yeah, I've watched them a few times. 32% that everybody has the same ability on Houston. They're all pretty good. They don't have great, but they're all pretty good. They're all pretty good. Okay, we move over to the top left, the Auburn bracket. Who you got in terms of upsets?

[Jeff Ma]

Okay, there I have. I have UCSD over Michigan.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay.

[Jeff Ma]

I love, I love that. I love the tribes. This again, this is not a matchup. I wanted this. Like, if they. I would have picked them to beat Illinois by 15. Michigan, though, boy, with that size, that'll be tough. Anyway, I'm taking them. I'M taking Yale over Texas A and M. I am grudgingly taking Iowa State. With one of their key players injured, it's another one. If they played someone else, I might against them. But I'm taking them. And I'm taking Richard Patino and New Mexico over Marquette.

[Tony Kornheiser]

And what about Ole Miss? UNC?

[Jeff Ma]

I'm taking Ole Miss.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay, I like UNC, but I'm the only one. Auburn, Louisville. Auburn, UCSD. Yale.

[Jeff Ma]

Yeah, quite a game there. UCSD. First ever NCAA tournament, and they're going to the Sweet 16.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay. Ole Miss. Iowa State.

[Jeff Ma]

Ole Miss.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Ooh, Iowa State was ranked, I think as high as 3 or 4 at some point this year, weren't they?

[Jeff Ma]

Yeah. Not playing as well. And again, they've got a key guy who's injured one of their top three players. And, you know, I just think that Mississippi I saw in person twice in. In Nashville at the SEC tournament. I was impressed by what I saw.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay, New Mexico, Michigan State, Michigan State, Auburn, ucsd, Auburn and Ole Miss.

[Jeff Ma]

Michigan State, Michigan State.

[Tony Kornheiser]

And again, it's a chalk bracket. Who gets out?

[Jeff Ma]

It's the month of Izzo. Tony. I'm going with the Spartans.

[Tony Kornheiser]

He does it a lot. He's been to. Is it nine Final Fours? He's only won once. But he's been to a million.

[Jeff Ma]

Yeah, Yeah. I think he's been to eight.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Been to a million. All right, the Florida bracket. And let me say, as I've said every day we've done this, I've seen Florida two or three times. The best team I've ever seen. They score 130 points. They can't be that good because they didn't win the league. But they, you know, they look great when I watch them. Who? You got upsets?

[Jeff Ma]

Yeah, I think they're that good. Spoiler alert. I have got Colorado State over Memphis.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Mm.

[Jeff Ma]

And that's it. And that's another one like Drake. I would have loved to have picked Drake to win a game, but the matchup with Missouri is not a good one for them. Missouri is athletic. Drake is not. Missouri has length, Drake does not. Missouri puts people in foul trouble. Drake doesn't have a deep bench. Right.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay. Sadly, you pick Kansas over Arkansas, spoiling Patino against Calipari, which everybody wants to see. I know.

[Jeff Ma]

I'm actually in Providence as we speak because that's. We all are here. I'm here for the little. That little winners and sinners, corner of the bracket.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Yeah.

[Jeff Ma]

Calipari and Patino. It's tremendous.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Who was with us yesterday? Who Said they thought Patino would turn out the white suit at some point. One of the guests said that look for Patino in the white suit. I forget who that was. So. So do I. All right, Florida. Yukon.

[Jeff Ma]

If he. I will tell you this. If he's playing against Caliperi, he will not wear the white suit.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Won't wear the white suit. Okay.

[Jeff Ma]

No, he will approach that game so much deadly seriousness, because those angry each.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Other, they hate each other. Was it Sands that said it? Sands? Maybe it was Sands. Yeah, Steve Sands. All right, Florida, Yukon, Florida, Colorado State, Maryland.

[Jeff Ma]

Colorado State.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Oh, Steve Sands is so angry because he's got Maryland winning the entire tournament. Missouri, Texas Tech.

[Jeff Ma]

Texas Tech.

[Tony Kornheiser]

And Kansas. St. John's St. John's okay. Florida, Colorado State, Florida, Texas Tech, St. John's St. John'S and who gets out?

[Jeff Ma]

Florida. And you know, I'm tempted to. To pick up a tino Final four with a fourth difference.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Louisville, Kentucky. St. John's yeah, yeah.

[Jeff Ma]

Providence.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Yeah.

[Jeff Ma]

But. But no, I'm. I can't pick against Florida.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay, Florida, Michigan State in the month of Izzo.

[Jeff Ma]

Yeah, Florida. It takes April. By then, it's no longer the month of Izzo.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay. And Duke. Houston.

[Jeff Ma]

Houston. No, I'm sorry.

[Greg Garcia]

Duke.

[Jeff Ma]

Duke. My apologies. Duke. I'm going with Duke to again, if Flag is able to be 100%.

[Tony Kornheiser]

And Duke. Florida.

[Jeff Ma]

Florida.

[Tony Kornheiser]

So you agree with me, right? You've seen him more than I have. I just. Every time I see him, I go, wow, they just score points all the time.

[Jeff Ma]

Yeah, they are. They're incredible offensive team, they are deep, they are big. Their guards are good and tough, and Todd Golden's a rising star coach. You know, it's a lot to ask, but I think they can do it.

[Tony Kornheiser]

So let me ask this, because you're a reporter. Most of the people we have on here have no idea what reporting is. The Todd golden thing's a little bit icky in the way that the Oats thing a couple of years ago with a murderer on the team was a little bit icky. Florida has cleared Todd Golden. Right. Florida said, we don't see it. We're good here, but there's a lot of smoke there. What do you think?

[Jeff Ma]

Yeah, icky is a good word for it. Yeah, it is awkward, messy, for sure. And I actually was thinking. I went back and looked like the wording from Florida wasn't, he's cleared. It was that. That we can't find a Title 9 violation.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Right. Okay.

[Jeff Ma]

It was. It was. You know, if you want to parse language and we go to the way the. The NFL does. Replay review. Call is confirmed or call is upheld. Confirming. We clearly see this is what the call should be upheld is different. We don't know.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Not sure.

[Jeff Ma]

Yeah. And I think this one falls into the category of there is nothing by our rules that we can say happened as a Title 9 violation. But that doesn't mean they're saying all everything was. Was like completely harmless or whatever the case may be.

[Tony Kornheiser]

He's accused of stalking, is he not? Among other things.

[Jeff Ma]

Yes, among other things. And there's been a lack of explanation in general. You know, he and his legal team have just basically said he's been cleared. You know, let us get on with our lives. And that's about as far as they've gone.

[Tony Kornheiser]

I do remember when Alabama got to the Final Four and this became a real big deal. Every press conference. I assume the same thing will happen with Golden. I assume golden will say I'm here to talk about basketball and other questions I'm not going to deal with. Right. That's what we anticipate.

[Jeff Ma]

Yeah, that. But yeah, I think the questions will be asked and I think the questions will be rebuffed as best they can.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Yeah, yeah. But it's. I don't know. I don't know. All right, so you got Florida winning. Plug your podcast for us.

[Jeff Ma]

Well, podcast is on a little hiatus, so we will not plug the podcast at the moment. But the. The written words are [e-mail] will be throughout the tournament. We got a March Madness landing page with a million stories on it and I've written a million words this week, but I'm happy to be on and win the bracket pool again.

[Tony Kornheiser]

We would not bet against you. Never. As always. Thank you, Pat.

[Jeff Ma]

Thank you.

[Tony Kornheiser]

We will take a break and then we will come back with Jeff Ma and I am Tony Kornheiser.

[Jeff Ma]

Today at T Mobile, I'm joined by a special co anchor.

[Greg Garcia]

What up, everybody?

[Tony Kornheiser]

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[Jeff Ma]

That's quite a deal, Snoop.

[Tony Kornheiser]

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[Jeff Ma]

You can save versus the other big guys.

[Tony Kornheiser]

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[Greg Garcia]

You're listening to the Tony Kornheiser Show.

[Tony Kornheiser]

This is a woman named Michelle Brerman. This is called My Favorite Year. This is sent to us by Michael Granberry. So you know it's great. Yes. And Michael writes. On Valentine's Day, my wife and I drove to a venue near our home for a night of cabaret. We went to see my friend, consummate cabaret performer Amanda McBroom, who, as a songwriter, wrote the Rose, which became the title song of a movie and a number one hit for Bette Midler. But seeing Amanda opened the door to an unexpected surprise. Her incredible piano player and background vocalist is a woman named Michelle Brerman. A gifted songwriter in her own right with a striking resume, Michelle sang a solo, a ballad she wrote titled My Favorite Year, an unforgettable memory about the road not taken when it comes to love. This is Michelle Breorman. First of two songs today. This is my favorite year. And Michael Granberry never misses. Never. He never misses. Always. Brilliant. This plays in Jeff Ma, who's a pro at what we're doing now. Well, maybe not at what we're doing now, but who's a pro in the world of odds and gambling. And Jeff's going to give us his picks. Are you ready to start with me on the. On the Eastern regional? The Duke regional?

[Pat Forde]

I am ready to start, Tony.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay, tell me all upsets in the first round.

[Pat Forde]

We're going to take Baylor over Mississippi State.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay.

[Pat Forde]

And we're going to take Vanderbilt over St. Mary's so not that exciting.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Well, but it's. It's okay. I mean, I. I know everybody loves St. Mary's you know, because they have to love Gonzaga, So they love St. Mary's but Vanderbilt had a couple of pretty good wins this year, though. Maybe they were in football. It's hard for me to remember. Hard for me to remember. So here we go. Duke, Baylor, who you got?

[Pat Forde]

I'm going to take Duke.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay. And Oregon. Arizona.

[Pat Forde]

Take Arizona.

[Tony Kornheiser]

That's a one and a four. Go ahead, byu. Wisconsin, go ahead.

[Pat Forde]

I'm going to take BYU there, which is interesting because this game is going to be played in Denver at altitude. And I do think this is one where Wisconsin kind of offers short restaurants, is getting a little bit the shaft here in terms of where they could have played. And unfortunately, I think BYU will win this game.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay. Vanderbilt, Alabama, Alabama. It's just so interesting that one of the things that the NCAA prided itself on and justifiably was trying to avoid teams in the same conference playing each other until really late in the tournament. That's a second round game. Vanderbilt, Dallas, because you got 14 teams.

[Pat Forde]

In, 14 SEC teams, so it's. You kind of can't avoid having them play.

[Tony Kornheiser]

I agree. I agree. Okay. In the Houston bracket, the Midwest give me everything that's an upset first round.

[Pat Forde]

Let's see here. I don't have any upsets there in that first round. Those are all chalk.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay. Then I'm going to write them down. Gonzaga, Clemson, Purdue, Illinois. Duke. Killed. Illinois, Kentucky, ucla. All right, so we move with chalk. Houston, Gonzaga.

[Pat Forde]

I'm going to take Houston and I'm going to take Clemson.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Mm.

[Pat Forde]

Over Purdue. I think that's. We've had this anti Big Ten bias. We'll just continue that because that seems to work in the tournament now. I will take Illinois against Kentucky. Kelsey's kind of been uneven this year. Illinois, even though they returned Kind of nobody from last year has played well. And then I'm going to take Tennessee over ucla.

[Tony Kornheiser]

You know, whenever I didn't watch a whole lot of college basketball, I concede that point, Jeff. Whenever I watched Duke, I thought they were really good. Whenever I watched Florida, I thought they were great. Whenever I watched Big Ten teams, I was not impressed. I was just not impressed with Big Ten teams. Maybe that's my anti wilbond prejudice, but I was not. I was just not particularly impressed. I wasn't. Okay, Houston, Clemson.

[Pat Forde]

We take Houston.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Mm. Illinois. Tennessee.

[Pat Forde]

Tennessee over Illinois.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay, let me go back up because I didn't take you out to the elite Eight. Duke, Arizona.

[Pat Forde]

I'm going to take Duke.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay. And at the bottom of that, byu. Alabama.

[Pat Forde]

I'm going to take Alabama.

[Tony Kornheiser]

So we end up with chalk. We end up with ones and twos in the first two brackets for Jeff, we go over to the Auburn bracket, the south bracket. Any upsets in the first round, I'm.

[Pat Forde]

Going to have the SDSU UNC winner beating Ole Miss. And I think it's going to be North Carolina. It's going to be that classic. No one thought they should have gotten in. And they make a little run.

[Tony Kornheiser]

I like that. I think that you're right about that. That's just me. Any others or is that just it?

[Pat Forde]

In this, I take New Mexico over Marquette.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay.

[Pat Forde]

Get like another patino going through.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay, that's fine. Okay, so Auburn, Louisville take Auburn. Okay. Michigan, Texas A and M take Michigan. Michigan is a five seed. They went through the Big Ten tournament, and the three teams they beat are all seated ahead of them. Isn't that weird, Jeff? That's like a weird thing.

[Pat Forde]

Those games even really mattered. I mean, if you. The committees basically said as much, like, what do you expect them to do? Change things a half an hour before the show? So it's like, it does make you think. Do these postseason tournaments even really matter? Should people even try to win them? Because it does seem like they were decided to be a five seed on Friday and Saturday and Sunday didn't matter.

[Tony Kornheiser]

I think the only teams that should try to win them are teams that think that they may not get in. And if they have that opportunity and have one of those Kemba Walker runs, you know, then. Then I think you do it. But other than that, I don't care. Okay. The play in game against Iowa State, you're going to still go with UNC or sdsu?

[Jeff Ma]

I am.

[Pat Forde]

I'm going to go with unc.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Well, they got to be there Then.

[Pat Forde]

Okay, and then I'm going to have New Mexico having an upset against Michigan State.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Oh, all right. So you're definitely not chalky at the bottom of the south bracket. Auburn, Michigan.

[Pat Forde]

I'm going to take Auburn to win that.

[Tony Kornheiser]

And the play in guy or New.

[Pat Forde]

Mexico, I'm going to take unc, the playing guy.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Good. Just staying with it. I like that. On the PTI show today, Wilbon went on and on about how terrible North Carolina was and how they shouldn't get in and Indiana should get in and just. Just screaming. And I said to him, look, I just watched North Carolina two games against Duke in a week, and they could have won at least one of them, maybe both of them. Duke's the overall number two seed. Why are you babbling like this? Just on and on. I mean, in North Carolina, I said could beat 30 teams that are in this bracket. You agree with that, right? They could beat 30 teams.

[Pat Forde]

I'm going to have them go to the lead eight.

[Tony Kornheiser]

There you go. All right, the Florida bracket. What do you got?

[Pat Forde]

Let's see, for upsets, I have Colorado State against Memphis, which by seeding is an upset by. But by the spread, you know, Colorado State is favored in that game.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Wow, I didn't know that. Okay.

[Pat Forde]

And I'm going to take Drake over Missouri. That's about a six and a half point spread right now. But Drake is a team that plays super slow, minimizes possession, so you get a little bit more variance there when that happens.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay. Opportunity can upset anything else. You got Texas Tech.

[Pat Forde]

Yeah, everything else. I get Texas Tech. And everything else is chalk.

[Tony Kornheiser]

You have Kansas.

[Pat Forde]

Yeah, Kansas and St. John's thereby eliminating.

[Tony Kornheiser]

The possibility that I root for, which is that Calipari plays patino and maybe they try to shoot each other. Okay, Florida. UConn.

[Pat Forde]

Are we sure they're not the same person?

[Tony Kornheiser]

We're not exactly sure. Florida. UConn.

[Pat Forde]

I'm going to take Florida.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay. Colorado State. Maryland.

[Pat Forde]

Take Maryland.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Drake. Texas Tech. Texas Tech and Kansas. St. John's Kansas. Kansas.

[Pat Forde]

Yeah.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Going for the number one seed at the beginning of the tournament. Not the tournament, the season. Kansas was ranked number one at the beginning of the season. They lost like 11, 12 games, right, Jeff? A lot of games.

[Pat Forde]

They were a mess. But there's this sort of interesting thing with. There's teams number one or two seeds that were in the preseason top 25 are often disappointments. You've had teams like the overall, you know, University of Virginia, when they lost as a 1 seed, was in that situation. I think Marquette a couple of years ago is in that situation. This year, St. John's and Michigan State were not preseason top 25.

[Tony Kornheiser]

They were not.

[Pat Forde]

Now the thing is, the preseason top 25 is a predictor of how much talent you're returning, obviously. And the season shows how well you played, so that's what ends up mattering. But again, like this idea that Kansas probably has more talent than St. John's even though they probably didn't perform like that this year. It's worth a shot.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay, Florida, Maryland.

[Pat Forde]

I'm going to take Florida.

[Tony Kornheiser]

And Texas Tech. Kansas take Texas Tech. Okay, let's bring team, teams into the Final Four. Let's start Duke, Alabama. That's a big time game.

[Pat Forde]

I'm going to take Alabama. And the reason that this is a fun game is because the way Alabama plays, it's high variance, meaning if they make their threes, they're going to, they're going to win. They make an inordinate number of threes, they're going to win. And that's the only way the Sioux team loses is to a team like that. That just puts them into a high variance situation because three is worth more than two. So if they can shoot a lot more threes and make them, they'll win.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay, Houston, Tennessee.

[Pat Forde]

I'm going to take Houston to win that game.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay. That's what the coach there has done a very, very great job at Houston and did a good job at Oklahoma and has done a good job in a lot of places. Kelvin Sampson in a lot of places.

[Pat Forde]

Auburn, because they always seem to disappoint and so people expect that. But this, everyone says this is their best team that they've had. So there's a year, this is the year.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Auburn against UNC or sdsu, but you probably UNC Auburn against them.

[Pat Forde]

Sorry, I'm going to take, I'm going to take Auburn there.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay. That's the second team from that league in the final four in Jeff's bracket. And Florida, Texas Tech.

[Pat Forde]

My take, Texas Tech.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Have you seen Texas Tech a lot? Because Florida, I watched Florida once or twice and said they're great, they're just great.

[Pat Forde]

So they're, they're very, very good. So is Texas Tech. Texas Tech is a very underrated team by the analytics people. And honestly, at this point you're just, you know, you're trying to make a bracket, right?

[Tony Kornheiser]

That's right.

[Pat Forde]

Pick a little bit, a little bit of. You know, we had Ken Palm this week on BET the process.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Yeah.

[Pat Forde]

He talked about how this is this year. Is the most top heavy year that he's ever seen. You have four teams that are ranked higher than I think any team was last year, just from an analytics perspective. So you could just sit back and advance those top four teams to the final four and call it a day, or you could have some fun and pick some upsets.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay. All right, so let's get to the final game. You've got Auburn and Texas Tech. Who you got got Auburn. And you've got Alabama and Houston.

[Pat Forde]

I'll take Houston.

[Tony Kornheiser]

And who wins?

[Pat Forde]

Houston vs. Auburn in the finals.

[Tony Kornheiser]

That's a very. I don't know that we'll get another person picking Houston. I really don't. I think that people, you know, Jeff are sort of enamored with, with the SEC at this point. They've seen him a lot more. And Houston has no particular stars. And Houston is a grinding sort of team. They're not. They're not a fun team to watch. So you may be alone in our, in our pool. You may be all alone in this one.

[Pat Forde]

Well, I'd rather be alone than with the crowd.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Yeah, you'll make all the money if you win. Yeah. Or the toothpaste. Yeah, the toothpaste that we give out for people that win.

[Pat Forde]

Can't wait.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Yeah, I know. Thanks, Jeff.

[Pat Forde]

Thanks, Tony.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Jeff, Ma. Boys and girls, Greg Garcia is next and I'm Tony Kornheiser. You're listening to the Tony Kornheiser Show. This podcast is brought to you in part by Stash. Saving and investing can feel impossible. But with Stash, it's not just a reality, it's easy. Stash isn't just an investing app. It's a registered investment advisor that combines automated investing with dependable financial strategies to help you realize your goals faster. They'll provide you with personalized advice on what to invest in based on your goals. Or if you want to just sit back and watch your money go to work, you can opt into their award winning expert managed portfolio that picks stocks for you. Stash has helped millions of Americans reach their financial goals and starts at just $3 per month. Don't let your savings sit around. Make it work harder for you. Go to get.stash.comtonyk to see how you can receive $25 towards your first stock purchase and to view important disclosures. That's get.stash.com Tonyk paid non client endorsement. Not representative of all clients. Not a guarantee. Investment and advisory services offered by Stash Investments llc, an SEC registered investment advisor. Investing involves risk offers subject to Teas and Siege, which stands for terms and conditions. Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate First. Like, you know to check the Jumbotron first before attempting to eat a stack of Supreme Nachos in one bite. Now, you're just a meme that everyone shares on game day. Checking first is smart, so check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Savings vary, subject to terms, conditions and availability. Allstate Fire and Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.

[Greg Garcia]

This is the Tony Kornheiser Show.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Once again, this is Michelle Brerman. This is a Michael Granberry discovery. She is singing youg're Only Old Once. And Michael writes. Stephen Holden of the New York Times once wrote that Ms. Boorman's Ms. Breorman is the most talented of a new breed of nightclub arranger who understands Broadway, country and rock and roll equally well. And her settings run from classy pop chamber music to lilting country jazz. Because she's great. Yes. And Michael, if people like Michelle Brerman would like us to play their original music, which we're thrilled to do, how do they go about it? Send us your music by emailing it to jinglesonykonheisershow.com and again, ESPN Tournament Challenge Search Group Tony Kornheiser Show 2025 Listen up. Is the passcode. It's right there. You can put in two brackets. And we look forward to sharing some prizes later in the spring. Lots of toothpaste. Lots. Nothing suspicious about that. No, not at all. Lots of toothpaste. Okay, this is what everybody waits for. They wait for two people. They wait for Phil's mom. And they wait for Greg Garcia. Yes, we have Greg Garcia, who would like to make an opening statement. And then we will go to the brackets.

[Greg Garcia]

Greg was the night before my segment and I've been a little stressed. I know people expect a lot from me, but what if I've given you my best? Picking a long shot has become my thing. But that's not this year's plan. I mean, Longwood didn't even make the dance. So what are we even doing here, man? So I'm not sure I can be as funny or get all my picks right. But there is one thing I can do that could be out of sight. I'll rhyme channeling Louise Gluck. She's good, Pete. And if people don't like it, I'll channel James Carville and not give some bleep. By the way, Any. Any other podcast I rhyme with Gluck. It was sitting right there.

[Tony Kornheiser]

I understand, I understand, but we do a clean. We do a clean podcast here. So let us start with the east, the Duke regional. Any upsets in the first round?

[Greg Garcia]

I've got two for you.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay.

[Greg Garcia]

This team is angling for a win, hoping to be the upset du jour. And just like Phil's mom fishing in an inlet of the sea, they'll need to use their best. Baylor.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Baylor. An upset, that's one.

[Greg Garcia]

This next one is a team that will score more than the great Wayne Gretzky. I'm taking Vandy for the upset for our boy Nate Bargets.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Oh, that's. He went there. Did he go there? He lives there.

[Jeff Ma]

He lives there.

[Tony Kornheiser]

He lives there. He went to. He went to junior college, right? He does a bit about that. Yeah. Okay, so that makes me happy. All right, so let's. Let's move on in this bracket. Duke. Baylor.

[Greg Garcia]

Baylor is in trouble. Their defense has more holes than the little house. Duke to advance and Baylor to flush them out.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay, Duke, this is so good so far. I don't know how you're going to go for 40 picks, but let's go.

[Greg Garcia]

Oregon, Arizona, Afternoon yesterday. Tony, go ahead.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Oregon. Arizona.

[Greg Garcia]

After four years of my son's tuition, this school's got quite a few of my bucks. At the very least, they should bring me joy. So I'm going with the Ducks.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Byu, Wisconsin.

[Greg Garcia]

I hate to say it, but up against the Badgers, the Mormons have no prayer. Wisconsin's will send them home packing their magic underwear.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Vanderbilt. Alabama.

[Greg Garcia]

Well, the Commodores have a guard named Edwards. He's faster than a Jet Ski. So I'll be in Vegas watching Vandy win with our boy Nate Bargetze.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay, Vandy, big upset. Taking out Alabama. Duke. Oregon.

[Greg Garcia]

Duke will win this game as it's a mismatch of sorts. But post game, the Ducks will eat more pizza than a hungry czar of sports.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay, that's inside. That's so inside. Wisconsin. Vanderbilt.

[Greg Garcia]

Okay, in order to make this next rhyme work, I have to change my voice so as I try to sound like a 1940s gangster. Please know I had no choice. Vandy will lose this game but cover the spread. So I'll win my bet, see? And this is the last time I'll have to rhyme with Nate Bargett, see?

[Tony Kornheiser]

Yeah, that's an Edward G. Robinson impersonation for people over 80. Edward G. Robinson. Yes. Duke. Wisconsin.

[Greg Garcia]

I had Wisconsin losing this game because winning would be a fluke. But yesterday I changed my mind because Steve Sands hates Duke.

[Tony Kornheiser]

So you have Duke or. Or Wisconsin.

[Greg Garcia]

Wisconsin.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Wisconsin. Okay. Steve Sands does hate Duke. He hates North Carolina, hates Michigan. Doesn't hate anything like he hates Duke. Okay, bottom of the bracket, the Houston bracket. Any upsets in the first round?

[Greg Garcia]

I've got one. Just for fun, High Point over Purdue. I'd hate to say it, but they're just better. And Purdue's defense couldn't stop a moth through a sweater.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Oh, God, don't remind me. So many. So much money down the drain for me. So much money. Okay, Illinois. Kentucky. Ucla. Okay, Houston. Gonzaga.

[Greg Garcia]

Gonzaga will try their best, but the Bulldogs won't have a hero. Houston is as sure to win as I am to always be. Chuck and Roxy, number zero.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay, Clemson. High Point.

[Greg Garcia]

Tony, I'll take High Point. Would upset my blue plate double play. And that's straight from the mouth of Nolan's own T boy Latcher Light.

[Tony Kornheiser]

High Point doing James Carville Channeling Carville. Illinois, Kentucky.

[Greg Garcia]

For this next pick, I consulted Reginald the Monkey. He was at the zoo with mini driver Hal Holbrook and Madonna getting function. He showed me a picture of him and Loretta Lynn drinking bourbon. Until Reginald got lucky. So it's no surprise to anyone that he's going with Kentucky.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Absolutely. Ucla, Tennessee.

[Greg Garcia]

Tennessee will take out the Bruins. A victory they will revel in. But the Voles will win with care and compassion, like you'd get at CVS from Evelyn.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Oh, we'd miss her. We don't know where she is. We don't know what CBS she's at now. Oh, she's on to that one. We don't know. Okay, Houston. High Point. And I'm just wondering, is High Point going to be this year's Longwood? Let's see.

[Greg Garcia]

High Point had a good run, but their luck won't last. They've got as much chance of advancing as I do. Getting on the Chuck Todd cast.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Isn't that a good name? The Chuck Todd cast.

[Greg Garcia]

I like it.

[Tony Kornheiser]

I like that. Kentucky. Tennessee.

[Greg Garcia]

Tennessee wins by taking it to the rim. Even though tough defense is in Kentucky's aura. Tony, the paint will be more congested than Jason Lock. And for us.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Houston, Tennessee.

[Greg Garcia]

Unfortunately, Tennessee season will end a little too soon. They've got as much chance of beating Houston as I have at Jeff Ma. Hooking me up at Trune.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Jeff Ma should hook you up at Trune. I mean, he's working.

[Greg Garcia]

We're exchanging text, we're exchanging tech.

[Tony Kornheiser]

He's working on that. I mean, he works there. Yeah. And you can bring bargazzi. Yeah, and that'll be good. All right, top. Top left. Auburn. The Auburn bracket. Any upsets?

[Greg Garcia]

Yeah, I got to call me a rum dumb, but let's start with Lipscomb. They say Iowa State can win without Gilbert, but I don't believe the height. Just like Tony getting 30 pints of ice cream. That story is hype.

[Tony Kornheiser]

That's. Yeah, totally. Pipe story. Any others or. That's it.

[Greg Garcia]

New Mexico will fight and sweat so much you'll have to break out the score. Marquette's run will be shorter than an email from DG.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Like that. You worked on these, didn't you? You worked on this stuff. Okay, so let's go to the next round. Auburn, Louisville or Louisville Cardinals will get.

[Greg Garcia]

Down early and fight back. But they'll be. But they'll be too late to the party. Auburn will cut through Louisville like Chuck Berry working on a T bone steak.

[Tony Kornheiser]

A la carte Alucardi working on a T bone steak Alaka. Yeah. On his way to the promised land. Yes, operator, get me Norfolk, Virginia tide water for 10. Oh 9. Michigan A& M. Oh, boy.

[Greg Garcia]

Texas A and M will lose in Italy. They would say they failed at the Quizza. I'm sorry. That was the only way I could sneak in a rhyme from my girlfriend, Edith Salizza.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Edith Salizza. Oh, Ms. Lipscomb.

[Greg Garcia]

Oh, this game will. It's too hard to call, but I have no idea who will win. But I'm going to go with Ole Miss so I never have to say the word Lipscomb again.

[Tony Kornheiser]

New Mexico, Michigan State.

[Greg Garcia]

With Zappa at 7ft, he will block, shoving, bat. I'm picking Michigan State to win and hoping they send me a big box of that.

[Tony Kornheiser]

They got stuff. Michigan State. Oh, yeah, they got stuff, all right. In the Florida bracket upsets.

[Greg Garcia]

Oh, no, wait. Don't we have Auburn?

[Tony Kornheiser]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Auburn, Michigan. Yep. Sorry.

[Greg Garcia]

Some say Michigan can catch Auburn napping, but I say no way Auburn is more elusive than Daniella Monet.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Yeah, I can't find her. She. She. I mean, Jared was gonna get me and make sure that address was good. I guess I had no subject. Who knows? Who knows? That's too bad. Ole Miss, Michigan State.

[Greg Garcia]

Ole Miss will. Ole Miss will get ahead early, but Michigan State will win out of the blue. Oh, and if you're listening to my picks on Apple, please leave a review.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Auburn, Michigan State. To get to the Final Four, the.

[Greg Garcia]

Number one seed will advance. Michigan State. The number one seed will advance. Michigan State will provide no twist. So how many teams from the SEC in my final four. Auburn. That's it.

[Tony Kornheiser]

That's the list. That's the list Wilbourne tried to steal. That is the only thing I've ever invented in my life. That's it. That's the list. And Wilbur tried to steal that. All right. The Florida region upsets first round.

[Greg Garcia]

Nigel, I got two mate. Starting with Colorado State for this game. Alumni Steve Sands has stored up on snacks so he'll break out the freezer Brie. And Colorado State will advance with a hearty lecheeserie la cheeserie.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Any others?

[Greg Garcia]

Drake has a division team 2 team brought on by a new skipper. And they will advance to the next round with more change than a male stripper.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Thank God for him. You need any money? You need 100. I'll give you change for 100. That was really good. Like that Florida, Yukon.

[Greg Garcia]

They all can't be winners. Florida will win. They've got skill, speed and endurance. And their big man rejects more than Cigna Insurance.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Calculated indifference gives no aid. Denied. Colorado State, Maryland. The Sands will be.

[Greg Garcia]

This one will be tight. Maryland will win by a smidge. But they'll white knuckle through the game like Tony on the Bay Bridge.

[Tony Kornheiser]

I don't like that. Don't like that look straight ahead all the time. Drake and Texas Tech.

[Greg Garcia]

After Drake's first win, things will get messy. Texas Tech's going to make them look like a toy that met Chessy.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Jesse threw up again today, Greg. The second time in three days. This. It's all yellow when it comes out. And little bitty sort of green balls in it. I don't know what it is. I just have no idea what she's doing. I think it's probably some animal poop or something like that. Kansas, St. John's St. John's will win.

[Greg Garcia]

But I don't have a rhyme. Actually, if you haven't seen it, check out Sprung on Amazon Prime.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay, there we go. One of Greg's shows. Yes.

[Jeff Ma]

Florida, Maryland as a homer.

[Greg Garcia]

I'd love to back the Terps, but they just haven't got a chance on the court. The Gators are smoother than Tony's penguin dance.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Okay, Texas Tech, St. John's Texas Tech.

[Greg Garcia]

Will vow to win. They say no matter what they'll grin and bear it but in the end they'll keep their word as long as Miles Garrett.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Yeah, Miles Garrett. How about that? I'm doing this for principal. Oh, wait, there's money. I could stay. Yeah, just forget about the principal thing. Florida, Texas Tech to get in all Right.

[Greg Garcia]

Oh, no.

[Jeff Ma]

Florida.

[Greg Garcia]

St. John's I'm sorry.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Florida. St. John's that's right. Sorry.

[Greg Garcia]

That's right.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Look, look.

[Greg Garcia]

Pitino isn't perfect. His list of scandals isn't small. But even with his history, I like St. John's warts and all.

[Tony Kornheiser]

St. John's into the finals. So now you have Auburn. St. John's on the left side.

[Greg Garcia]

Yes. Auburn has high hopes to raise that glistened cup, but their season will be canceled just like. Listen up.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Yeah, we didn't 20 episodes. We were canceling after about three. They just used the rest of them. Wisconsin, Houston.

[Greg Garcia]

Houston's office will cut deep like a nearsighted moil. And Wisconsin. And Wisconsin will come out cold like they weren't wrapped in foil.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Oh, God, that's funny. A near sighted mole. You don't want that. St. John's Houston to win it all.

[Greg Garcia]

Oh, I'm sure you're expecting a big finish, one that will leave you all in tears. But I'm sorry, I'm exhausted. This is the most writing I've done in years. St. John's will come out angry. Houston will be laid to waste. And Tony, I'll be at Uncle Benny's table soon, so save me some toothpaste.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Oh, yeah, we got toothpaste for you. We got blue, we got white, we got all sorts of toothpaste. You're going to come in town in a couple of weeks and this is great. St. John's you have St. John's winning.

[Greg Garcia]

St. John's winning it all.

[Tony Kornheiser]

All right, that's good. Thank you, Greg. That's a lot of work. You put in a lot of work.

[Greg Garcia]

Some would say too much.

[Tony Kornheiser]

No, it's a lot of work. It makes us very happy. Thank you, Greg. Talk soon.

[Greg Garcia]

All right, bye.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Greg Garcia. Boys and girls, we will take a break. We will come back with email and jingle. I am Tony Kornheiser. That was brilliant. Pro savings days are back at Lowe's with limited time savings on the supplies pros need. Get up to 40% off select major appliances plus save an additional $100 on every $1,000 you spend on select major appliances. And don't miss your chance to activate and earn three times the points on select DeWalt and Klein tools Lowes. We help you save valid. The 328 selection varies by location. All supplies last see associate or lowe's.com for more details on qualifying items. This is the Tony Kornheiser show and that's really impressive by Ian Warrington. But he's Also an emergency room doctor plays all the instruments and he's an emergency room doctor. Let me put this violin down. I've got to do an appendectomy. Unbelievably great. So great you want to do the Bethesda bagel ad for us? Yes, Bethesda bagels. We love them. You will as well. Just go to BethesdaBaggles.com for the location in the DC area nearest you. Then pop on in and you'll be thrilled. And before we get to the mailbag, let me just say calling out around the world, everybody ready for a brand new beat? Summer's here and the time is right for dancing industry. They're dancing in Chicago. Martha Reeves, the Vandellas. Fabulous tune. Thanks to our guests today, Pat40, Jeff Ma and Greg Garcia. Thanks as well to today's sponsors. Remember, you can listen to us on Apple podcasts, Spotify Odyssey get show through Apple. Please leave us a review. I wanted to remind people that there is a concert on Sunday, this Sunday, March 23rd by the Marine Corps Band at the Music center in Strathmore in North Bethesda. And this is sent to us by Master Sergeant Rachel Ghadiali. I hope I pronounce that right. Who writes I recently heard the kind words you said about the President's own United States Marine Band on your podcast. My husband's a huge fan introducing you a long time ago on pti. So I wanted to reach out and say thank you. I also want to invite you on behalf of our director, Lieutenant Colonel Ryan Nolan, to attend our gala concert which will take place 3pm this Sunday. 3pm March 23, the Music center at Strathmore in North Bethesda, one of the most exceptional concert venues in the D.C. area. We're celebrating the Marine Corps 250th anniversary and the concert will feature the Marine Band plus the Marine Drum and Bugle Corps and dozens of other Marines featuring patriotic pieces and lots of Marine Corps motivation. If your schedule allows, the Marines of the present own would be privileged to welcome you and a guest to this Gaylord performance. It's very, very nice. And she signs Semper Fidelis very respectfully, Rachel. So if you have a chance and you can go, it's really great music. Bring a card to exit the parking lot. Yes. To avoid problems. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I feel like it's more like Southern Rockville than Northern Bethesda, but I don't. Yeah, well, I mean, whatever. Okay, that left turn. Kevin Goldberg, Capitol Hill in Washington, D.C. i was listening to Steve Sands do his brackets as I was coincidentally walking past Calvert Liquors the Cheeserie on my way to the dentist. At the end, he referenced the Sands household, but I had to listen twice to make sure he didn't say the Sands Castle. Because if my last name was Sands, that's how I'd be referring to my place of residence. Hey, come over to the Sands Castle for a barbecue tonight. If you don't hate Duke, you can't live at the Sands Castle tonight. At the Sands Castle. Otis Day and the nights. Okay, maybe that's a little bit much. If that wasn't on his radar, tell him you're welcome for me. And while you're at it, please tell Joe Dasquipo or to Scipio to eat it as well. Sioux City, Iowa. Tony Auburn versus Michigan Steve Sands. I love a Jewish guy living in Auburn, Alabama. Won several laugh out loud moments with Steve Sands. Pick. Oh, yeah, and he hates Duke. Tom Targonsky, Sioux City, Iowa Sands was great. He was great. He really was. Wayne Mossman. Our friend Wayne Mossman in Moscow, Idaho. I assume that Sands white hot hatred of Duke is so strong that rather than sing along with Springsteen when the Boss plays Backstreets and croons where desperate lovers park, we sat with the last of the Duke street nights. He just spits and mutters, I hate Duke. Oh, and again, a second one from. From Wynn Mossman. Did I say Wayne? I meant Wynn Mossman. Quick question. Does Steve Sands hate Duke?

[Jeff Ma]

Hate Duke.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Hate Duke. Jeremy Lambert sent him the photo of Bootsy, by the way. Yeah, with Duke in a Duke shirt. Couldn't deny it's a great photo. Coldale, Alberta, Canada. Living in the part of Canada that's the west and not the Midwest. I typically skip through bracket week, but I always make an exception for Phil's mom, Balor. It's like a planet from Star Trek where Captain James T. Kirk must defeat a supercomputer and seduce a female leader. Or maybe I have those reversed. Mr. Sulu, set course for Balor. The care that you show her is something that I've never heard before. I love her, though we've never met. I've been waiting for those words Though we've never met. Jolene Wojic, our friend from Grand Island, Nebraska. Phil's mom mispronouncing Creighton as cretin was our good luck charm, but now that she's jumped ship to Louisville, I fear we're doomed. Still, I'm sticking with my blue jays in my bracket Ignoring logic just like Phil's mom always ignores proper pronunciation. How we love her. John Pearson in Milwaukee. I'm incredibly in somewhat obsessive. I am an incredibly and somewhat obsessive listener to this high quality podcast, but there is only one one day of the year that causes me to check my feed multiple times to see if it has come out. As someone who lives in the shadow of Marquette University in Milwaukee, it is the day of Phil's mom's NCAA picks. Hearing the pronunciations and lack of any reason for the picks had me giggling in my car like an idiot. The only qualifier being qualifier. Being a school, being Catholic makes it a religious experience. And I do expect Phil's mom to pick Vatican Polytechnic to win it all next year. I also look forward to next year when Bob Ryan declares that the only thing that qualifies as an upset is if a team not actually in the field beats a number one seed. We have a haiku from Shad. You can analyze. You can listen to experts. I roll with Phil's mom from Sam Fritz in Schaumburg, Illinois. Are the prizes for the brackets going to be tubes of toothpaste or some of the 30 pints of ice cream I need to plan my grocery trips carefully? There was no 30 pints. Toothpaste is going to be at least one of them. Cans of chips. Yeah. Can't we get the canned chips? They're pretty good. I haven't opened them yet, but you know I will. They look good. Yeah. Remind me, Michael, I have a gift for you when we leave. Miles Roberts, the English department, a PhD candidate at Baylor University. As a PhD student and teacher in Baylor's English Department, I wanted to second your opinion, that of the crew, that we are indeed lucky to have Faith Courville heading to Waco next academic year. She sounds brilliant and very much like an English major to me, too. Please tell Faith I'll BE Teaching English 1310 Rhetoric and Composition in English 2301 British Literature Survey next year and be thrilled to have a Laura Lill in my class. Surveys. Isn't that course. Have you taken that? It's a reference to a movie. Oh, which movie? Good Will Hunting. Oh, that's a long. Oh, yeah, I love that movie. I didn't remember that. P.J. donnelly, Springfield, Virginia. Please tell Faith Courville's dad, well done for me. I think every father who listened to that email reach for a tissue. It's true. I did too, due to sudden blurry vision from an injection of tears have felt that lump in their throat hearing that spectacularly written email. The only thing I've heard my kids tell me in the car when the podcast is playing is can we listen to Number Blocks now? What is number Blocks? I don't know. I'm looking it up. You should know that Neil Ayervase, our lawyer friend in Littleton, Colorado, Monday's podcast provided some heartfelt and poignant moments. Your remembrance of John Feinstein with Wilbourne combined a perfect combination of your subjective emotions about the ebbs and flow of a friendship with such an intense and challenging individual and objective assessment of his strengths and flaws. Exactly how any of us would wish to be remembered. More personal to me was the Lovely email from Ms. Corville and her description of how sports and your podcast provides a continuing connection with our father. While my father struggled with PTSD from his service in the Army Medical Corps in World War II, in ways that hampered any emotional connection, we always had sports. Our Brooklyn and LA Dodgers and New York sports to serve as a bond and even now is coveted memories. Much as Michael can always cherish his memories of being left alone with a can of soda at baseball games, she had a cap sticker Jim in St. John's in Newfoundland, Canada, I typically get bombed on cheap Pinot Grigio paired with cheaper, no name brand salt and vinegar potato chips every Friday and Saturday night. No complaints. Validation baby. So we're gonna. We're gonna try these chips out and tell everybody what it's like. Tim Pujol, pronounced O, pronounced Peugeot with an l at the end. Peugeot. Okay, Peugeot. My good and sadly late friend John Halbach sold wine for a living, and when visiting him about 20 years ago, he decided we would open a lovely bottle of very expensive champagne at his home. I was expecting strawberries or some fancy nauseas as an accompaniment, but instead he brought out a bag of lay's Classic Pack potato chips and informed me that due to the saltiness and oil, it was the perfect pairing I had. Parenthetically, I just stumbled on this. I had no idea it was embarrassing to me that I did it. Even more importantly, as I read the email again, he shared with me that wine is all about the experience, elaborating that people usually associate the wine at dinner with the conversation, food personalities and social interaction at the table, so that a simple bottle of wine costing no more than $25 may often be remembered by those in a dinner party as one of the best they've ever had. So whether it is a Beaujolais or a Sauvignon Blanc, I'm sure that a dinner at the Kornheiser home, undercooked salmon or not is a delight. And from Tim Welby in Scranton, Pennsylvania, the person to whom I'm related by marriage and I have some well to do friends coming to dinner next week and I need some advice. What wine do you suggest serving with? Jack's cheese puffs. They're made with real cheddar. That helps. I'll hang up and listen if you're out on your bike. Tight. Everyone, as always, do wear white and tell me you brought three of your friends.

[Pat Forde]

Could you please introduce.

[Greg Garcia]

Yes, there's George Palasol, Ringo Stone and Palmer Charmley.

[Jeff Ma]

You.

[E]

Reappearing in my mind you were right and I was blind but that was long ago.

[Tony Kornheiser]

Now.

[E]

Do I ever cross your mind? Are your memories like mine or have they let you go? After all the loves I've lived through all these years I had to go so far without you now it's clear you were my favorite love that was my favorite year. When we we were young forever yesterday. Fools and little children run away. If we could go back there would we stay? After all the loves I have lived through all these years I had to go so far without you now it's clear you were my favorite love that was my favorite year. You were my favorite love that was my favorite Here I.

[Tony Kornheiser]

La.

[E]

You can sit in your chair. You can bitch and moan about the teeny tiny letters on your new iPhone. You'd rather take a nap than face the world and its stunts. Wake up darling, you're only old once. You can long for the days of your golden youth. When you were lithe of limb and short in the tooth. You were firm, you were free and you were also a dunce. Times have changed and you're only old ones. Remember hungry nights, you noisy bars with all those horny singles. All the things you could catch from your perfect match. There's no cure for lust but there's a shocked pushing go. Once you quit fussing bout the shape you're orange shoes round and happy over bitchy and thin. You can eat all the cake you want, even the bunce. Grab a fork, tootsie. You're only old once you can Hormones kicked in and your brain went to Disneyland fast. When your hormones kick out, you can hear yourself shout Great God almighty, I am free at last. When you look in the mirror, remember to say you'll never be younger than you are today. Besides, think of all the crap that youth confronts and be grateful. You're old, but you're only old once. You can tell the truth? Let your schnauzer out? Let every day amaze you? Can be who you are? Set your own style? Honey, these are the good old days? You cannot run it? Though I know you've tried? Life is short? So, honey, make it white? And count all your blessings? Forget the affronts? They're a waste of precious time? And you're only old once? There's no rehearsal? Don't be timid? Don't be cool? Now's the time? You wanna be a fool? So learn to love it, kiddo? You're only old once?

[Tony Kornheiser]

Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

That is so much fun.

[Tony Kornheiser]

That's whip.

[E]

That is a whipped cream pie.

[Tony Kornheiser]

You guys. You whip that cream.

[E]

You guys, back to the piece.