The Tony Kornheiser Show – “Will Fix Teeth” (September 5, 2025)
Overview
In this engrossing episode of The Tony Kornheiser Show, Tony is joined by regulars Jason La Canfora, James Carville, and Jeff Ma for a characteristically wide-ranging and lively discussion. The conversation kicks off with NFL Week One reactions, pivots to tennis (notably a historic US Open women’s match), detours into community notes about the Bethesda Row Arts Festival and Syracuse Mets, then dives right back into football with deep-dive game analysis, predictions, and betting wisdom. Regular humor, personal anecdotes, and the unique camaraderie between the cast make for an entertaining listen.
Main Themes
- NFL Week 1 review and upcoming matchups
- Wild storylines in sports, including spitting incidents and stadium trivia
- The tennis US Open, with a focus on Amanda Anisimova’s stunning comeback
- Betting strategies for the new football season
- Listener and community highlights
Episode Breakdown
1. Opening Banter and Local Notes (00:00–04:55)
- Tony warms up with plugs for the show’s guests and some community events.
- Bethesda Row Arts Festival highlighted, with praise for Bree Hayden’s bottle artwork.
- “She does paintings of bottles... They're immaculate. They're accurate.” – Tony (02:13)
- “It's astonishing.” – James Carville (02:16)
- Bethesda Bagels' 43rd anniversary sparks lighthearted banter.
- “It always offends people when this little guy straight to the line, worms his way up to the front and gets his stuff and walks out without paying.” – James Carville (02:44)
- Jason Smorell, GM of the Syracuse Mets, shares details about Le Cheeserie Night and reveals quirky show connections (including tales about Joey Chestnut’s wing-eating feat and his dad allegedly fixing Zsa Zsa Gabor’s teeth in Syracuse).
2. Women’s Tennis US Open: Anisimova’s Astounding Turnaround (04:55–12:32)
- Tony launches into a recap of the US Open women’s semifinals, marveling at Amanda Anisimova’s redemption after a devastating Wimbledon performance:
- “Let’s go back a little over a month. Let’s go back to the final at Wimbledon where she is playing Iga Swiatek. She loses six love, six love... double bagel. She gets routed. It’s total destruction.” – Tony (07:59)
- “And she beat Swiatek in straight sets. This is the greatest turnaround, I think, ever in tennis.” – Tony (09:09)
- Anisimova earns major admiration for mental resilience:
- “To come around that quickly, sort of embrace it and say, all right, it happened. Let me learn from that.” – James Carville (11:01)
- “We should be carrying this woman in a chair, right? Absolutely. What have we seen this in?” – Tony (10:13)
- Tony and guests briefly preview men’s semifinals, express skepticism about Djokovic’s chances at age 38, and recap Osaka’s historic loss:
- “By the way, Osaka, she’d never been beaten before in a situation like this.” – Tony (12:03)
3. NFL Week 1: Eagles, Cowboys, and The Spitting Incident (15:33–20:49)
The Spitting Incident (15:33)
- Jason La Canfora joins to discuss the Eagles-Cowboys opener, focused on the bizarre spitting event and its massive impact:
- “You can try to account for injuries, you can try to account for weather... but I mean one of the three most important players in that game, getting himself removed before the game even had a kickoff.” – Jason La Canfora (15:49)
- “That’s a brain cramp. That’s terrible decision-making of an epic level. And it almost cost them the game.” – Jason La Canfora (18:16)
- “Was there anything from that game where you say to yourself, I wasn’t expecting this?” – Tony (19:16)
- Discussion ensues about Eagles' O-line injuries and whether their “bully ball” strategy will hold up in 2025:
- “I just think the margins can start to get a little slimmer. And I’m just wondering if they’re going to be able to bludgeon everybody they face at the point of attack on both sides of the ball like they did last year.” – Jason La Canfora (20:09)
4. NFL International Expansion, Key Games & Analysis (20:49–29:00)
- Tony and Jason puzzle over why Kansas City vs. Chargers is being played in Brazil.
- “Why is the NFL in Brazil?” – Tony (21:23)
- “Money. Greed... you can only go so far in the US and so it’s just purely money.” – Jason La Canfora (21:24–21:28)
- Deep dives on other key matchups: Ravens at Bills, Vikings at Bears, Lions at Packers, Steelers at Jets.
- Detailed breakdown of Detroit’s coaching turnover and whether “brain drain” matters.
- “...it is a big deal now… Dan Campbell has built a culture there... but they also lost their center who had a lot to do with the sort of rebirth of Jared Goff.” – Jason La Canfora (26:06)
- La Canfora frames Green Bay as the likely division winner, especially after big off-season trades.
5. Betting Wisdom and Picks Segment
Jason La Canfora’s Betting Show Plug (29:00)
- Jason plugs his new show “Want to Bet with Us”: “We’re on everything – World Cup qualifiers, WNBA, but obviously this time of year a lot of NFL and college. Doesn’t cost you a thing.” (29:03)
James Carville’s Picks: “Sloop John B” Walk-Up Music (31:43–35:28)
- James Carville debuts his walk-up music, then gives his picks:
- CINCINNATI -21 vs Bowling Green (33:19)
- MISSOURI -6.5 vs Kansas (33:32)
- TULSA -5 vs New Mexico State (34:05)
- JETS +3 vs Pittsburgh (34:10)
- BROWNS +6 vs Cincinnati (34:39)
- RAVENS +1.5 vs Buffalo (35:09)
Jeff Ma’s Betting Approach and Selections (36:33 onwards)
- Jeff Ma discusses impacts of NIL and transfer portal on betting markets:
- “...ultimately you’re always trying to find inefficiencies in a market, and when there is information that can be interpreted differently by different people, there are pretty big opportunities for inefficiency.” – Jeff Ma (37:25)
- Greater parity in college football due to player movement and less top-heavy rosters.
- Micah Parsons trade to the Packers and market reaction: “...the market tends to overreact to things like that. I think understanding an individual player’s impact on a team in the NFL is very, very hard...” – Jeff Ma (42:54)
- Jeff Ma’s Picks:
- UNLV +2.5 vs UCLA (43:30)
- ATLANTA +2.5 vs Tampa Bay (43:33)
- GIANTS +6.5 vs Commanders (44:06)
- MIAMI +1.5 vs Indianapolis (45:05)
- JACKSONVILLE -3.5 vs Carolina (45:15)
Golf Sidebar: Cypress Point and The Walker Cup
- Brief detour as Jeff remembers playing Cypress Point: “It’s one of the most amazing golf experiences... 16 feels like the best nature walk you’ve ever been on in your life and you happen to just be holding golf clubs.” – Jeff Ma (46:08)
6. Listener Mailbag, Banter, and Notable Quotes (49:07–56:12)
- Fans write in about gardening (potatoes and zucchini gone wild), barbecue tips in Texas, and share warm memories of sportswriters and press box etiquette.
- “I’ve done nothing. They’re in the ground. I’ve done absolutely... let mother nature do the work.” – Tony on his potato crop (49:44)
- Jokes about “actual zucchini too large to eat.”
- Brief lament about the new TV show “The Paper” making light of dying newspapers.
- A witty haiku about John Wall’s Wizards jersey retirement, thoughts on Derrick Rose, and Pittsburgh sports bar tales round out the lively correspondence section.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
- “She beat Swiatek in straight sets. This is the greatest turnaround, I think, ever in tennis.” – Tony Kornheiser (09:09)
- “To come around that quickly, sort of embrace it and say, all right, it happened. Let me learn from that.” – James Carville (11:01)
- “That’s a brain cramp. That’s terrible decision-making of an epic level.” – Jason La Canfora (18:16)
- “Money. Greed... you can only go so far in the US and so it’s just purely money.” – Jason La Canfora on the NFL in Brazil (21:24)
- “We should be carrying this woman in a chair, right?” – Tony Kornheiser on Anisimova (10:13)
- “It always offends people when this little guy straight to the line, worms his way up to the front and gets his stuff and walks out without paying.” – James Carville (02:44)
- “It is a labor of love, my friend.” – Jason La Canfora on his betting show (30:11)
Timestamps for Key Segments
- Opening and Arts Festival: 00:00–04:55
- Tennis Recap/Anisimova Story: 04:55–12:32
- NFL Spitting Incident: 15:33–19:16
- Eagles, Cowboys, Weekend Games: 19:16–22:11
- NFL in Brazil & More Matchups: 22:11–29:00
- Betting Segment: Carville/La Canfora: 31:43–35:28
- Betting Strategy: Ma: 36:33–46:06
- Listener Mail & Final Banter: 49:07–56:12
Tone & Takeaways
Brisk, humorous, and highly conversational, the show blends sports insight with playful digressions and affection for the show community. Listeners get sharp football analysis, remarkable tennis stories, betting wisdom, and enough in-jokes and guest chemistry to feel like they’re part of the inner circle.
Listeners will come away entertained and informed, with memorable moments from both the sports world and the unique world of Tony and friends.
