Podcast Summary: THE TRUTH ABOUT YOUR FUTURE with Ric Edelman

Episode: “What Do You Do?” is Becoming an Inappropriate Question

Date: December 18, 2024
Host: Ric Edelman

Overview

In this episode, Ric Edelman explores the evolving social implications of the question “What do you do?”—a staple of small talk that’s becoming increasingly awkward and less relevant in today’s rapidly changing world of work, retirement, and identity. Ric discusses how this question, once a simple way to gauge someone’s occupation, now often fails to account for the diversity of life paths—including retirees, stay-at-home parents, gig workers, and those between careers. He offers fresh alternatives for both asking about and answering questions of personal identity and purpose, advocating for a reframing that better reflects modern realities.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Social Role of “What Do You Do?”

• For over a century, a person’s occupation has defined not just their income but also their social standing, education, and even worthiness as a conversational partner.
  • “For the last hundred years, what you do for a living is equal to who you are. Your social standing is reflected by your job.” — Ric Edelman [01:00]
• Ric explains how this dynamic creates discomfort for those outside traditional employment paths, such as retirees, stay-at-home parents, or people in transition.

2. Shifting Demographics and New Challenges

• With 10,000 people retiring each day, more people than ever are facing this question without a simple job-based answer.
• The challenge is not limited to retirees:
  • Stay-at-home dads
  • Career changers “in between jobs”
  • Gig workers with multiple roles
  • Baby boomers pushed into retirement by ageism
  • People laid off or leaving the traditional workforce

3. Reframing the Question (and the Answer)

• Ric encourages listeners to reflect on what actually makes them happy and to craft answers that center on passions and interests rather than employment.
  • “Reframe your answer instead of referring to a job that you no longer have or a career you've left. You want to reframe your skills. Don't relate it to work but to some other aspect of your life.” — Ric Edelman [03:45]
• Examples of possible answers:
  • “I play the guitar all day.”
  • “I volunteer.”
  • “I love doing puzzles.”
  • Or, more broadly: “I reinvent myself every day.”

4. Good Alternatives to “What Do You Do?”

• Ric suggests new icebreaker questions that are more thoughtful:
  • “What are you up to these days?”
  • “How was your day today?”
  • “What do you like doing?”

5. Memorable Anecdote & Quote

• Ric shares the story of a friend who helps other executives adjust to not having a job:
  • “When he's asked, ‘What do you do?’ he says, ‘I don't do. I used to do, but now what I do is help people who do do stop doing.’ That's a good—a great icebreaker.” — Ric Edelman [07:10]

Notable Quotes & Moments

• On the weight of the question:
  • “You tell somebody what you do for a living, you're pretty much telling them how much education you've got. And you're also telling them...whether it's really worth their time to even just talk to you.” — Ric Edelman [01:30]
• On self-reinvention:
  • “What do you do? Oh, I rediscover. I reinvent myself every day.” — Ric Edelman [05:40]
• A lighthearted moment:
  • “I don't do. I used to do, but now what I do is help people who do do stop doing.” — Ric’s friend, as recounted by Ric [07:10]

Timestamps for Key Segments

• [00:45] – The social history and implications of “What do you do?”
• [02:00] – Groups challenged by the question: retirees, gig workers, career changers
• [03:45] – How to reframe your answer to “What do you do?”
• [05:00] – Examples of reframed responses and encouragement to discover new interests
• [06:15] – Better questions for getting to know someone
• [07:10] – Ric’s friend’s funny approach to answering the question

Tone & Style

Ric Edelman’s approach is conversational, humorous, and empathetic. He acknowledges both the awkwardness and the opportunity in rethinking how we define and discuss our sense of purpose, encouraging listeners to embrace reinvention and curiosity.

Conclusion

Ric wraps up the episode by reflecting on personal reinvention and inviting listeners to shift how they both ask about and define themselves beyond their jobs. The message is optimistic, forward-looking, and practical—empowering listeners to build new narratives and connections as our relationship to work evolves.

This summary is designed for those who haven’t listened to the episode, capturing all important content and memorable moments, while skipping ad reads and other non-essential segments.