The Unplanned Podcast with Matt & Abby

Episode: TikTok Couple: Our Break Up & Birth Story w/ the Quist Family

Guests: Courtney & Alex Quist (@thequistfamily)

Date: August 6, 2025
Hosts: Matt & Abby Howard

Overview

In this heartfelt and lively episode of "The Unplanned Podcast," Matt & Abby chat with viral TikTok couple Courtney and Alex Quist. Known for their marriage and parenting content, the Quists dive deep into their whirlwind relationship, an unexpected breakup, whirlwind marriage, and the raw realities of becoming new parents. From navigating modern dating, overcoming birth fears, to the honest challenges of first-time parenthood, the Quists offer an encouraging perspective for those forging their own family stories.

Main Themes

• The reality behind social media love stories
• Navigating modern relationships (including dating apps)
• The myth of “soulmates” and the choice of love
• Rapid relationship timelines & family reactions
• Transformative moments in early parenthood
• Birth stories and facing generational fears
• Honest talk about postpartum, baby milestones, and balanced parenting

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Meeting & Early Relationship: Dating in the Digital Era

• Met on Hinge: Their relationship began with a long late-night call after connecting on the app. “I was like, I don’t even know what this girl’s last name is, but ‘Courtney Quist’ has a good ring to it.” — Alex (03:23)
• Modern dating realities: Courtney was casually dating multiple people when she met Alex, sparking critique on TikTok. She defended this, sharing it was common to "date around" before exclusivity.
  “I was destroyed. People were like, ‘Oh my gosh, she was cheating on him…’ And I was like, bring it back 30 years, when that was a normal thing.” — Courtney (04:34)
• Moving in proximity: Three days after meeting, Courtney happened to move five minutes from Alex. She joked about accepting help moving from several guys she’d dated, leading to some awkward but comedic moments. (07:34–08:25)

2. The Almost-Breakup & “Soulmate” Realization

• Breakup for clarity: Courtney, expecting a magical “soulmate” moment, initiated a breakup. Both were devastated, but within three days realized their connection went deeper than ephemeral chemistry.
  “We broke up for three days, and then in those three days, I was like, never mind. I can’t picture my life without you.” — Courtney (01:50, 02:48)
• Love is a choice: The myth of a perfect moment or person is debunked; instead, the couples stress intentionality and growth as a foundation for lasting love. “It’s dangerous to have that mindset… If you’re thinking, ‘Oh, like, this is the one, just perfect’… the instant they see some flaws, they’ll be like, ‘Oh, my gosh. Was I wrong?’” — Alex (12:51) “Love is a choice. Like, is this someone that you could choose to, like, live with for the rest of your life?” — Courtney (13:46)

3. Whirlwind Timeline: Engagement & Marriage

• Rapid progression: Met July 1, engaged five months later, married at nine months. Both were 29 at the time. (16:09–15:36)
• Friends before dating: Their strong friendship laid a healthy foundation, including a unique period of no physical intimacy or labels, per Alex’s conviction.
  “He really got to meet the true, authentic Courtney, which is what I wanted too.” — Courtney (20:46)
• No pushback: Despite the fast timeline, the couple recounts minimal family opposition, aside from a humorous first meeting with Courtney’s dad:
  “What’s your name again? I’ll probably forget it.” — Courtney’s dad (30:47)

4. Engagement & Proposal Stories

• Surprise proposal: Alex successfully surprises Courtney by staging a lease signing for their future apartment, flying in her best friend and parents to witness the event. Courtney almost foils the plan by obsessively measuring the closet on arrival (28:41–29:54).
• Ring talk: Both couples reminisce about prioritizing meaningful over flashy rings — “I made it a goal to find the cheapest wedding band I could find.” — Matt (25:59)

5. Fears, Family, and Baby Planning

• Big family dreams: Initially, Courtney wanted nine children, but math and reality (and seeing vans like the LeBrants) have revised the number downward.
  “Maybe not five, so maybe four. I think four is probably where we’re going to end up being.” — Courtney (32:58)
• Overcoming birth fears: Generational trauma defined Courtney’s fears about labor, as both her mother and grandmother nearly died during birth. Therapy and preparation helped her manage anxiety. “As soon as I found out I was pregnant, I called a clinic because I was crying… Luckily, they set me up with counseling.” — Courtney (36:56)

6. Birth & Postpartum: Realities and Stories

• The “best birth experience”:
  • Courtney went nearly 42 weeks, avoided induction, and her water broke naturally.
  • She delivered at 7cm dilation due to her baby’s tiny head, astonishing the nursing staff:
    “Her head was just tiny… we had all of these nurses coming in because no one had ever seen anything like this.” — Courtney (41:54)
  • Epidural and medical care were “amazing;” she’s passionate about sharing positive birth stories.
    “I had an amazing experience. Like, it exceeded my expectations.… I wish more girls would hear that side of birth.” — Courtney (39:02)
• Notable moments:
  • Courtney loved the sensation of her water breaking:
    “Honestly, I could do that a million times again. It was the craziest, most satisfying feeling.” (40:47)
  • Used a mirror during delivery to watch her daughter be born (“craziest experience”, 43:10)
  • Pushed with rap and musical soundtracks for motivation, notably “Hamilton.” (47:01)
• Holding her baby:
  “I was crying like crazy because I had 30 minutes to realize, oh my gosh, I am now a mom… There’s no going back now.” — Courtney (47:27)

7. Parenthood: Adjustments and Surprises

• Structure shock:
  “It sort of wrecked my world a little bit because… there’s so much structure… I feel like by the second kid, I’m gonna be a pro. But first kid… I struggled a bit, but it’s so fun.” — Courtney (51:44)
• Dad’s experience:
  “It took me longer to feel like I built a connection with Aspen… I thought when she was born it was just gonna be instant… But now, oh, it’s so much fun.” — Alex (53:56)
  • Alex discusses helplessness during birth, doing his best to be supportive:
    “There’s nothing that I can do for her that’s really going to make her feel better or take any of that pain away.” (50:29)
• Balancing work & parenting: Both work from home as full-time creators, negotiating shifts between content creation and childcare. (52:12–53:37)

8. Modern Parenting Choices & Reflections

• Screen time: Minimal use under 1 year, but open to adjusting as they grow (“I’m kind of anti iPad, but I think that might change.” — Courtney, 58:01)
• Solids & Milestones: Aspen (their daughter) loves bacon but struggles with most solid foods.
• Embracing change: Much of parenting—standards, rules, perspectives—shifts from preconceptions to lived experience.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Love is a choice. Like, is this someone that you could choose to, like, live with for the rest of your life?” — Courtney (13:46)
• “She accidentally said, ‘I love you’ first. I dropped her off at her house. ‘Bye. Love you.’ 'Never mind, never mind.'” — Alex & Courtney (24:04)
• “You really got to meet the true, authentic Courtney, which is what I wanted too.” — Courtney (20:46)
• “Having a baby, was that the initial plan? …We sort of just—just started to not use precaution. And then I just got pregnant, like, right away.” — Courtney (36:11)
• “It took me longer to feel like I built a connection with Aspen… Now, oh, it’s so much fun. She’s laughing all the time.” — Alex (53:56)
• “Her head was just tiny… nurses coming in because no one had ever seen anything like this.” — Courtney (41:54)
• “If you’ve defined the relationship and you’ve said, ‘Oh, we are exclusive,’ and then you’re going on other dates, I think that’s obviously a problem. There’s nothing wrong with going on a date with somebody and then two weeks later going on a date with somebody else.” — Matt (05:59)
• “Maybe you just need to… keep trying [solids] over and over again and then maybe she can get used to it.” — Courtney (57:20)

Recommended Segments (Timestamps)

| Topic | Timestamp | |----------------------------------------|------------| | Meeting, dating multiple people | 03:15–08:46| | Breakup & “Soulmate” Reflection | 01:50–02:48, 12:51–13:46| | Engagement, proposal, and rings | 16:09–29:54| | Parenting standards & structure shock | 43:10–53:53| | Birth story & overcoming fears | 34:52–43:41| | Dad’s perspective on early fatherhood | 53:56–56:18| | Parenting in the digital age | 57:29–59:30| | Family planning reflections | 59:30–60:55|

Closing

Matt & Abby praise the Quists for their candor and relatability, and invite listeners to follow @thequistfamily on TikTok, YouTube, and Instagram for more on their journey. The episode offers an authentic, humorous, and hopeful look at how modern couples forge love, family, and meaning in a world full of expectations.