E915 – Going Deeper with Ally Lewber

Summary

The Viall Files: Episode E915 – Going Deeper with Ally Lewber

Introduction

In Episode E915 of The Viall Files, host Nick Viall welcomes Ally Lewber for an intimate and revealing conversation. Joined by co-host Natalie Joy and the Household, Ally opens up about her tumultuous relationship with James Kennedy, her journey toward healing, and her passion for astrology through her podcast Starstruck. Released on April 9, 2025, this episode delves deep into personal struggles, growth, and the insights that Ally has gained along the way.

Ally’s Relationship with James Kennedy

Ally begins by addressing the anticipation surrounding her appearance on the show, highlighting that discussions about her relationship with James were inevitable but felt out of place until now. Nick remarks on how allies observed changes in James’s behavior over time, attributing much of his personal growth to Ally’s influence.

“[00:02] Ally: You're crazy.”
“[02:22] Nick Viall: It was almost like, you know, I didn't know you then. ... I always attributed that progress a lot to you.”

The Incident: A Night of Conflict

The conversation takes a serious turn as Ally recounts a pivotal night that led to the involvement of law enforcement. She describes attending Kathy Hilton’s party, where tensions escalated due to James’s secret drinking habits and subsequent confrontations. Despite appearing sober, James’s behavior became increasingly erratic, culminating in a heated exchange that prompted neighbors to call the police.

“[05:06] Natalie: Had he been sober? He had been. To your knowledge?”
“[06:00] Ally: ... I didn't press charges. I was not hurt. And moving forward from that night, I definitely now look back and see things from a different perspective.”

Aftermath and Healing

Post-incident, Ally reflects on the emotional turmoil and the steps she took to distance herself from the toxic relationship. She emphasizes the importance of support systems, crediting her mother and friends for providing the strength needed to leave. Ally discusses the ongoing process of healing, acknowledging the challenges of breaking free from emotional manipulation and the importance of setting boundaries.

“[07:04] Nick Viall: ... do you believe Kristen Doute or Raquel ...”
“[09:31] Ally: ... I think too, of like the feeling of love, ... I don't think I have any regrets.”

Impact of Astrology and Starstruck

Shifting gears, Ally introduces her passion for astrology and how it has served as a guiding tool in her life. She explains the foundational aspects of natal astrology, emphasizing its role in understanding personal strengths, weaknesses, and relational dynamics. Throughout the episode, Ally demonstrates her expertise by analyzing the birth charts of herself, Nick, and Natalie, providing listeners with insightful interpretations.

“[52:12] Ally: ... like, these are your strengths. These are your weaknesses, and that's okay.”
“[57:50] Nick Viall: Honestly, it seems cooler than a birth certificate.”

Personal Growth and Future Plans

Ally shares her focus on self-improvement and healing, highlighting activities such as decorating her new apartment, practicing yoga, and engaging in therapy. She discusses how astrology has helped her gain clarity and maintain a positive outlook, even when faced with adversity. Ally also touches on her decision to pause dating, emphasizing the importance of prioritizing personal well-being and growth.

“[80:12] Ally: ... I’ve been throwing myself into that and ... I do yoga. I love yoga. I do meditate ...”
“[87:53] Ally: ... I'm just focused on myself and my podcast ... enjoying myself.”

Concluding Thoughts

As the episode wraps up, Nick and Ally discuss the broader implications of astrology in relationships and personal development. They explore how understanding astrological charts can reveal blind spots and foster better communication and compatibility. Ally offers heartfelt advice to listeners enduring similar struggles, stressing the importance of support systems and self-compassion.

“[85:39] Ally: ... trust your friends that are around you and your support system ...”
“[86:17] Ally: ... it's okay ... I'm just trying to heal and move forward.”

Final Insights

Episode E915 of The Viall Files provides a candid and heartfelt exploration of Ally Lewber’s experiences with love, loss, and self-discovery. Through her openness and expertise in astrology, Ally offers listeners valuable lessons on resilience, the importance of boundaries, and the power of personal growth. This episode not only sheds light on the complexities of relationships but also inspires those navigating similar paths to seek healing and understanding.

Notable Quotes

• “[02:22] Nick Viall: It was almost like, you know, I didn't know you then. ... I always attributed that progress a lot to you.”
• “[05:06] Natalie: Had he been sober? He had been. To your knowledge?”
• “[57:50] Nick Viall: Honestly, it seems cooler than a birth certificate.”
• “[85:39] Ally: ... trust your friends that are around you and your support system ...”

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Note: Advertisements and promotional segments are excluded from this summary to focus on the core content of the episode.

Transcript

[Ally]

You're crazy.

[Nick Viall]

Ally.

[Ally]

Hello.

[Nick Viall]

Welcome to the Vile Files.

[Ally]

Thank you. Hi, guys.

[Nick Viall]

We're so excited.

[Natalie]

It's been such a long time coming.

[Ally]

I know. Happy to finally have you.

[Nick Viall]

It is. Yeah, it is a. It was a long time coming. We've talked a lot about you coming on the show.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

We just obviously thought it'd be in different contexts than we are here today.

[Ally]

I thought there'd maybe be someone else next to me.

[Natalie]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Nick Viall]

He didn't seem to let that down.

[Ally]

No, no, no. At the time. Yeah, he definitely. He's not a podcast person. Yeah. I don't think it would have happened, to be honest.

[Natalie]

Well, thank God for us.

[Ally]

So here we are.

[Natalie]

So here we are.

[Nick Viall]

I always kind of took you mean. Listen, I get podcasting in general can be a little nerve wracking. It is a long form, you know, and things like that. But. But I always. Sometimes my spidey senses sometimes go up a little bit when people really seem to be afraid of having a conversation about themselves or their lives and things like that. And I always kind of got that sense from James that there was a reason why he didn't really want to come on and do a podcast. It wasn't a desire to not have attention or anything like that or the notoriety. It just seemed like maybe he didn't want just to go deep.

[Ally]

I know he would always say, like, well, I don't really want, like, if we're not filming, why would I. I don't really want to go and like, talk about everyone or like, have to keep all the drama going. So, like, that was always what he would say. But yeah, I just think that, I don't know, maybe podcasting, he. It just. Yeah, he wouldn't be very comfortable doing it.

[Nick Viall]

Well, we are excited to have you.

[Ally]

Thank you.

[Nick Viall]

And excited to talk about everything that is you and get to know you, obviously. Because, you know, like, I think a lot of times people know you as James's girlfriend.

[Natalie]

People know me as Nick Bile's wife.

[Ally]

You know, and obviously there's a lot more to you.

[Nick Viall]

You know, there's a lot more to you than obviously that. But I think we've always been very interested in getting to know you, especially even on the show. On the show, you kind of presented as this kind of very demure, very sweet person.

[Ally]

Thank you.

[Natalie]

Gorgeous.

[Nick Viall]

Gorgeous.

[Natalie]

Wonderfully.

[Nick Viall]

But as we, as we got to know you, you really did to be someone who really was the best version of James, you know? And like, I think at times, whatever growth I saw in James because for me, I didn't really get into Vanderpump until Scandal. Like many other people, I've gone back and watched a lot of the Ill episodes and things.

[Ally]

Oh, you have? Okay.

[Nick Viall]

Yeah. Yeah. Even I watched one this morning.

[Ally]

Oh, fun. Which one? No, I don't want to know.

[Nick Viall]

I'll ask you about later. But, yeah, so it did seem like James had started to make some progress. And the last time we saw you was that. That. That night. And I remember having a conversation with James, really, just about, like, man, it was like, almost like, you know, I didn't know you then. I've certainly heard things about your reputation, but you really seemed like you had made some progress, and I kind of always attributed that progress a lot to you.

[Ally]

Aw. Well, thank you. Yeah, I know it's difficult. I feel like a lot of people say that, and it's sweet. I do think that we both brought out the best in each other. Obviously, at times, he really helped me feel confident, and he really believed in me and helped me, like, you know, honestly pursue astrology and, like, kind of just. He's such a dreamer, you know? That was, like, one of the things that really drew me to him in the beginning. But, yeah, it was crazy, right? Like, I mean, he was really at the top of his game. Like, he was really. The DJ residency. Like, everything was going so well. Vanderpump was over, but somehow he was ending on a high note.

[Natalie]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Nick Viall]

Like, which was hard to do, right?

[Ally]

Yeah, it was such a good. We were. Yeah. And then everything. Yeah, yeah.

[Nick Viall]

So how do you. What's your comfort level? Obviously, we want to talk about that night and get a little glimpse into that relationship, but, like, do you want to warm up into it? Do you want to get right into it and then just get right into it and then push it away and then forget about it?

[Ally]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, that. That one.

[Nick Viall]

Okay.

[Ally]

All right. I mean, that night. So wait, when you guys were talking to him, so. Cause I was working at that event, Kathy Houghton's party. I was there with DirecTV. Yeah. I was there to do Kathy Houghton's birth chart. So for, like, the first two hours before. I mean, I hadn't even seen James. Right. Like, I was working, and then I rap. I come out. I'm finished. I'm, like, excited to see him. And he. Now we know, like, during that time, he had been, like, sneaking and going up to the bar and, like, ordering drinks. Okay. James is the person where he can have one drink and you can, like, immediately tell, like, it's pretty obvious. And I kind of knew something. I was like, you're being a lot like. You're being kind of like you're giving drunk James right now. Like, are. You know, we kind of got through the party and everything was fine.

[Natalie]

Had he been sober? He had been. To your knowledge?

[Ally]

To my knowledge, but no, he wasn't. So then later I found out, like, after everything that he was drinking behind.

[Natalie]

My back for like a while. Oh, wow.

[Ally]

Yeah. Yeah. At least a few months, like, that I know of. So that was like a whole other, like, side of everything too, where I'm like, okay, there's no trust then, you know, so that was a whole thing also. And then that's when. When we got in the Uber on the way back home, that's when I was like, you're drunk. And then he's like, no, I'm not. You're drunk. And I'm like, no, you're drunk. And it was just. Yeah. Then everything escalated.

[Natalie]

All we really know as like the public is that neighbors heard a disturbance, called the police. The police showed up. We have the police report that said that there was. It didn't name you.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Natalie]

So for I think a long time, we were like, allegedly Ally, because we didn't know, but it said that a female had been picked up and thrown to the ground. And that's kind of all we know of that night.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Natalie]

So what happened outside of your house?

[Ally]

Honestly, it was just such a. It was just such an upsetting night. Like, we were. My friend was also there and it was all of us just really fighting and yelling at each other. I wasn't hurt. I do know that. I don't know who called the cops, but I know they obviously showed up and then they like, assessed the situation themselves. I did not press charges. I was not hurt. And moving like forward from that night, I definitely now look back and I see things from a different perspective, you know, where like, obviously that night I was just so upset about the lying and the drinking and like, you know, I. In my head I was like, well, we're already done because you've betrayed my trust, you know? And he also knew that I already had told him before, like, hey, if you drink again, that's a non negotiable for me for this relationship.

[Nick Viall]

And when you say you weren't hurt. Just to clarify, was there any moment in that night where you or I guess anyone else who might have been present, like, felt like he was getting physically aggressive with you? Like, where did. Whether it's a Disconnect or perception of this situation that escalated into his arrest.

[Ally]

Honestly, like, not physically, but verbal manic, like just really, really loud and like intense and just like sporadic behavior where it's like, you don't really know what this person is capable of or going to do. It's not necessarily like a safe feeling. But that's again, like, that's just why with that relationship, like, looking back now, like just the eggshell, like walking on eggshells in that relationship, because you never know what's gonna trigger him. That was like the hardest part, which now that I'm like, out of that relationship, I'm like, oh, this is what it's like to have like a normal. Yeah. My nervous system is like regulated.

[Natalie]

I'm like, oh, was there part of you that maybe it was that night, maybe it was throughout the relationship that ever felt a feeling of being scared?

[Ally]

Yeah, I think that I don't know if I like, felt scared to the point where I felt like he was, like, I was unsafe, but to the point where I'm like, this isn't. I don't know, I feel like sometimes, like in the moment at least I thought that I could, like, regulate him or control him or like, help calm him down. So I felt like I kind of took on that role of like, it's okay, like, calm down, like, everything will be all right. And that's not healthy, I don't think. You shouldn't have to like, regulate someone.

[Natalie]

No.

[Ally]

Right.

[Natalie]

No, you shouldn't.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

You know, it's so tough in relationships. I think all of us, you know, if you have a past with relationships, you've had your heart broken, if you've been in long term relationships, whether it's, you know, maybe something as toxic as, you know, maybe the behavior James has displayed or whatever, you know, like, we, we've all been in relationships where, you know, we accept people for who they are. You know, we. We realize no one's perfect. We know we're not perfect. So we get into a relationship and there's always this like, I'm not asking to be perfect because you're not perfect and I can help you. And we want to help each other. And then.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

And then we kind of maybe learn a little bit more about our partners.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

And then there's that tough mental gymnastics of being like, wait, is this, is this behavior okay? Or do I just need to be there for my partner?

[Ally]

Yes.

[Nick Viall]

And then, you know, in James case, you know, like, for me, as I became more aware of James Kennedy, the character, his reputation. As I became more a fan of the show, you go back and watch old episodes and then people from the past. You know, Kristen Doughty's been very outspoken. Even Raquel has been outspoken. And, you know, like, people like Kristen or Raquel have their own baggage. They have their own history of behaviors that, you know, at times, people have used against them in terms of. I don't know if we should believe this person because they've done X, Y, or Z and. Or they're, you know, Raquel, like, there's. There's a history of being dishonest there with her and. And stuff like that. With all of the speculation regarding James's past behavior with women, is that something that you struggled with in the relationship with James? Just trying to figure out, like, who's telling the truth versus, like, hey, I need to be there for my my man type of thing. And is that kind of like the hindsight's 2020 that you're speaking about?

[Ally]

Yeah, that was really difficult in the beginning. I mean, heck, even now where, you know, this was just back in December, and obviously I got out of that relationship, but it's not like I just left and it was easy. It wasn't. And I felt really guilty, like, oh, well, now he's going to aa and, like, he does have alcoholism. So, like, do I need to be there for him and support him? Like, no. But, like, at that moment, I didn't know that. I felt really bad and guilty. I'm really grateful for, like, my mom and just my support system in la, because I. I don't know if I would have been strong enough to leave and to stay away, honestly. Like, I. I don't know if I would have been or not. So, like, I feel like that's another point, too, is just like. And if you're ever in, like, a relationship like that or something, like, in a weird way, I'm kind of grateful almost that it was so public because it allowed. It was, like, out there, and then my friends and family were able to really, like, you know, it's like you.

[Natalie]

Had strangers kind of holding you accountable to, like, not.

[Ally]

Yeah. Which sounds crazy.

[Nick Viall]

Had there been episodes or events in the past with James that almost felt similar to this event that weren't public, that he was able to talk you out of maybe making different choices?

[Ally]

Mm, yeah. Yeah, there were. Yeah. Like, there were a few. I mean, and I think I get like, even. You know, sometimes my friends would witness him just acting kind of, you know, a little manic. I would say I don't know if that's, like, the right word to use. I'm not, like, putting a disorder on him or anything, but just that behavior where it's just unpredictable. You're like, okay, where is this coming from? And, like, how do we stop it immediately? Yeah. So there were moments like that, and. Yeah, like, looking back. And that's kind of why, too. Like, he knew how I felt about him drinking. Cause, like, that's usually what would kind of spark that behavior. So he knew, like, I wouldn't put up with him drinking again.

[Natalie]

You think that's why he hid it for. Yeah, as long as he did?

[Ally]

Totally. Yep. And then even. I mean, he's a tj, right? So, like, he's traveling on the weekends. I'm not always there. And then he's at these events and DJing and drinking. And then we. He would, like, always go back to the hotel, and we would, like, FaceTime and chat, and he would be like, I could just tell. Sometimes I'd be like, you drank? And then he'd be like, no, I didn't. You always think that I'm. I'm drunk when it was you. You're drinking, kind of like gaslighting in a way.

[Natalie]

Was there ever a part of you that. When he was away and you weren't with him and he was DJing and y'all would FaceTime and you would realize that he was drunk, was there ever a part of you that was a little grateful you weren't with him?

[Ally]

Ooh, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I also never actually thought he was drinking. I would. Like, he was really good at, like. Yeah. Like, I'd be like, oh, of course you're not drunk. I'm so sorry. Like, that's so fucked up of me to think that. So then, like, looking back, and after all of this, I'd be like, okay, Halloween, when we went to Sur, were you drinking? He's like, yeah. It's like, okay. It's like, I was going back to these dates and kind of asking, and I'm not even mad at him for that. It sucks. Like, you know what I mean? It's. He wishes that we were still together. He wishes. I'm sure, that he didn't do all of that. You know what I mean? It's like, I don't blame him. I'm not mad at him. It's just the way that it has to be now.

[Nick Viall]

You know, obviously, you mentioned that night you weren't hurt. He didn't pick you up and throw you.

[Ally]

Right?

[Nick Viall]

But Like I said before, you know, and then when that all came out, I remember almost feeling kind of foolish, like, not knowing what the truth is. You know, we saw the police reports. I had a little bit of guilt because I felt like I had, you know, pumped up. James and I had talked about on this show about, like, man, he's really turned a corner, you know, like watching old episodes. Yeah, like, sure, he's done some things and he's done some things, but I see the growth. You know, you want to recognize that a little bit. And then we saw the police report and then, you know, Kristen spoken up more at that point. I had heard some comments from Raquel and quite honestly looked the other way, I suppose because of her reputation and what seemed to be her propensity for not telling the truth.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

But looking back now on your relationship, and I'm sure you've ask James about some of these people's comments, but, like, do you believe, knowing what you know about James and now that you're out of this relationship and you can see it with a clearer lens, do you believe Kristen Doute or Rachel when it comes to their accusations towards James and. And him being physical towards them?

[Ally]

I want to say, like, it's so hard because James has been in my ear not now, but, you know, for our relationship, obviously. And I've heard a lot, the rest of the cast mutually. That was just a very toxic relationship on both parties. So I don't really want to say anything, but I will say that. And I have to say this, but also, like, it's true, but, like, I always will believe women. And I do feel kind of guilty or bad and I. I shouldn't. I'm not going to take that on myself. But, you know, sometimes it is like, oh, like they were right or like, oh, these people saying all these things about James's behavior. Like. But sometimes I think you have to just really figure it out for yourself. It's like you kind of just have to, you know, I don't have any regrets. And James, at the end of the day, he is a great person. Like, he has great, great qualities. And he's wounded. Tried to fix that.

[Nick Viall]

Yeah. Speaking of, like, going back and watching old episodes, I was literally watching an episode this morning because we were recapping it and it was another example of. Of James. He was talking about Kristen. He was in a relationship with Rachel. It's just like to hear him say some of the things he says about women, towards women is a bit jarring, you know, And I think I don't know. You know, maybe it was because it was back in 2016 or different times. I don't know. You watch it back, and it's just like. It's.

[Ally]

No, it's disgusting. Yeah. It's alarming, for sure. Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

How did you. When you got into this relationship, how did. Have conversations with him about that? Did he. Like, what was his excuse or reasons? And do you feel like he has a warped sense, you know, or an opinion about women or towards women, that you feel like it needs some growth?

[Ally]

I honestly don't think it's women. I think because we've seen him act that way to men, too, and to, like. To, like, Max Vanderpump, Lisa's son. I think that he, again, is just wounded and, like, hurt people. Hurt people. And I think that he does not know how to process his emotions in a healthy way. And so it just. He's a verbal attacker. Like, he cuts deep, so it's less.

[Nick Viall]

About having a lesser opinion of women. He just.

[Ally]

He's a child. He needs to learn how to. Yeah. Process his emotions. And he's aware of that. That's like, you know, he is aware of it.

[Nick Viall]

What do you mean?

[Ally]

Like, we've talked a lot about it, you know, in our relationship, obviously, and just. He knows that he. He's got a mouth. He's mouthy. And he would always kind of joke, like, oh. With British humor. But he just. Yeah. I mean, it's never okay, like, the things. Even the word. Like, he would always use the word fat. Like, the way that I was raised, it was just like, you just, like, don't use that word. And so he knew that I had a lot of. I'm like, james, you can't say that. So, again, I feel like I would just take on this role as, like, almost being, like, that's not correct behavior. But, like, this is crazy. Like, looking back now. Yeah, it's kind of. It's crazy. I don't know. You see a side of him, at least. I did, especially in the beginning. Super charming, sweet, creative, hilarious. You're laughing. He's such a, like, attentive partner. All of those qualities are just so powerful. So it's like, I know who I fell in love with. I know who I was in love with. I don't have regrets. Like, I was fully, like, invested in that relationship, but it's hard to pay attention to, like, well, when the 10% is, like, bad, but 90% is good. Yeah, it's hard.

[Nick Viall]

Yeah, it's really hard. It's Hard.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Natalie]

Did he ever say anything to you along the lines of, like, you'll never be anything without me? Because I know Kristin kind of said that that was what he threw at her a lot.

[Ally]

Here's the thing. I'm sure when he was drunk, he would say mean things. I was really good. And I'm just saying this from, like, I don't know why, but, like, nothing he would ever say would get to me because I knew that I'm like, you're just, like, being a dick and you're drunk and, like. You know what I mean? I'm like, you're just wounded. But, yeah, again, it's like, I don't know.

[Natalie]

That's a hard. That's a hard mentality to have, though. I applaud you for that.

[Ally]

No, I don't. I don't know. I think I would just be like, why? You know, it's kind of like maybe that's why I stayed so long, too, because it's like one of those things. Things where I'm like, I'll just throw it right back at you. You know what I mean? Like, we kind of were. Even my friends would be like, well, you're really good at putting him back in his place, which, like, that's not great. Like, that's okay. Yeah, that was great for the time being. But you don't really want a partner that you can, like, match that energy with. Not that I was matching his energy, but, like, I. I would be like, that's.

[Natalie]

It shouldn't ever have to get to that.

[Ally]

Exactly.

[Nick Viall]

Yeah. Like, it's. It's a very difficult position that you were in to. Yeah. To. To not want to see the best in your partner.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

You know, and I don't know what people are thinking who are listening, but, you know, it's. People can be very critical of people in your position, whether it's for staying or maybe sounding like you're defending his actions and things like that. But it's. It's much more difficult when you're in that situation to. To see it the way, you know, with an unbiased. You know, like, how I might see it if I was, like, watching a conversation or a fight between the two of you. What have you learned about yourself specifically around selecting your next partner? And maybe just certain behaviors, like, you talked about non negotiables. Have your non negotiables changed in terms of accepting certain behaviors and finding that balance between, yeah, like, I want to help you, but, like, I can't. I can't look the other way with.

[Ally]

X, Y or Z. I think too, of like the feeling of love, like when you're in it. And like not saying that he was love bombing me because his actions always followed and like, you know, we were in love, but it happened so quickly. Like we moved in together right away. We were like going to Tulum, like the second week of knowing each other. That's crazy. Like, I'm Capricorn. Like, I wouldn't do that usually. I thought I was crazy. But there's this, you know, when you're in love, you're like, okay, I'm just gonna ride the wave. Like, this feels right. This feels so fun. But I think now being on the other side of it, like having just a healthier kind of view of like the way that love should escalate and how it should play out. It doesn't need to feel like, so cosmic.

[Nick Viall]

I think a lot of people in your shoes, especially people who have or are in relationships with addicts or people who abuse substances, the challenge obviously for them is hope in the sense, because if. If you can. And I. Not from an alcoholic standpoint, but like, for different, you know, for me it was like, if in relationships, if, like, if I can identify a problem, then I can fix the problem.

[Ally]

Right.

[Nick Viall]

So whether the problem's me or whether the problem's a partner or the problem's us, it was like, I just have to find a problem and I can fix the problem. And I feel like with people who suffer from substance abuse for, for their partners, there's. There's always hope because there's always a chance that this big problem that seems to be the center of all the problems could get fixed?

[Ally]

Yep.

[Nick Viall]

Now that James is seemingly back in recovery, seemingly sober and seemingly doing the work.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

Are. Do you feel like you're at risk of one day him knocking on your door and claiming he's a new changed man who's been sober for a period of time. But this time it really has stuck and it would be, you know, it would, it would. It would be hard for anyone who, who loved that person to see and especially like the last thing we want, like to find that the person you loved and you accepted them at their worst has now. I know, is now better and you don't get to enjoy.

[Ally]

Right.

[Nick Viall]

The better. You know, it's like that those that mental up, you know, like how. So how do you deal with that or that potential? And have you thought about.

[Ally]

It's so funny you say that because I remember also when we started Dating, like, talking to Raquel and being like, thank you. Because, like, I'm sorry that you didn't get this version, but, like, thank you for helping him. Like, it's kind of weird how. Just I don't know the pattern. You know, I honestly do have so much love for James that I want him to genuinely heal and get better, and I want him to find love. Like, I really do. And I don't think that that will be with me. I feel like there's just been too much that's gone down. I think I would always just be on edge or, like, wondering what if? You know? And it's hard because I would love to support him and do that, but I just can't. Yeah. Yeah, but that's. I haven't really thought about that, to be honest.

[Nick Viall]

Yeah, it's scary, right? Just because we hope is. Hope can be a great thing, but sometimes when it comes to relationships, we. Yeah, we invest way too much in hope and we don't see. I always ask people, like, what was. Like, what do they do that makes you happy? And then people be like, you know, it's just like. But they're so funny, and I. I really like it when they do this. But, like, they don't really think about how that person, day in and day out, makes them feel like, what's your normal resting emotion in this relationship? Anxiousness. Like, on edge, you know, and things like that.

[Ally]

That's what's so hard. My therapist has been incredible because I was telling her, like, after all of this happened, I was like, I'm just so confused because I didn't realize at the time. I was like. I literally thought that our life was like a fairy tale. Like, I loved it. I loved our house. I loved hippie. I like, everything was great. Both of our careers, like, it was just perfect. And I was like. It was so great. And she was like, allie, no, it wasn't. He was lying to you. So, like, it wasn't real. And I was like, shit. Whoa. Yeah, so it did take me a while to almost have to, like, really remove myself and, like, to see clearly again.

[Nick Viall]

Yeah, it's tough, too, because then you're like, well, I have to wait. I have to say goodbye to a life too, you know? Like, I don't have. I don't. Like, fine, I don't want them, but what about my life?

[Ally]

No, literally, I'm like, but hippie?

[Nick Viall]

Yeah. And is hippie with you now?

[Ally]

No, hippie is with James. But it's okay.

[Natalie]

We have your cats.

[Ally]

I Have my cats. I have Mr. Banks and Bode. I've been sleeping with the stuffed goldendoodle. It was Hippie's little golden doodle, and they literally, like. So I took that with me. But no, he's with James. And hippie is great. I like. James and that dog are literally soulmates. Like, I honestly, like, if anything, great from that relationship. I mean, a lot of great things have come from it, but, like, him getting hippie back and, like, that whole story, like, he is a great dog, dad, and I will, trust me, I would not let Hippy be in a position where he was ever unsafe. Like, he's good.

[Nick Viall]

I heard something about that. James is back DJing now or on tour.

[Ally]

Yeah. Yeah. He's. I believe that he. I don't know if he got his residency back or if he's just. But I know he played at Live again, and I'm. I'm. I'm happy. I want him to. I don't know. I want him to.

[Nick Viall]

I mean, from a work. Yeah, like, I. I get what you're saying, but, like. And I guess it's really maybe none of our business, but you certainly have the right to have an opinion about that relationship. From an outsider point of view, it seems a bit quick. I understand it's his career. I understand people have to make a living. But, like, that is a lifestyle that makes it very difficult.

[Ally]

Oh, in that regard. Yeah. Yeah.

[Natalie]

That's a triggering environment.

[Nick Viall]

So, like someone who's so. You know, And I guess for me, you know, it's just like, again, you know.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

His history with Raquel, Kristen, you know, obviously with you, it's like, this is a man who. And my biggest criticism of him has been he seems to blame it all on the alcohol. You know, all of his problems are wrapped up in his. His sobriety or lack thereof. And it's like, you know, and I've kind of been very critical of that, but it's like, all right, fine.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

You know, but if that's the case, gee whiz, it sure seems a little quick that you're back out there dropping beats, you know, and we're supposed to think that you're. You're ready to do this when in the past you have claimed to be sober, you've lied about being sober, you've relapsed multiple times. It's a. It's like an old. He's like a broken record.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

Do you think that's a fair. I mean, criticism that I have or other people have, like, questioning once Again, just how genuine is this person about changing his ways?

[Ally]

The. I mean, that's exactly why I can't be with him, right? Because I don't know. Because I won't know. We won't know until, like, enough. Until he proves it. I hope that he is. From what I've seen, he has been going to aa. He has a support system around him that are also sober. So, like, I just hope that he stays on that path. I know that he loves DJing more than anything in the world. Like, he will move to Ibiza if he has to and just, like, play music on the beach. You know what I mean? Like, that is what he, I believe, is meant to do. So he'll figure it out. But I. Yeah, I hope it's not triggering for him, but not my problem.

[Nick Viall]

Are you guys in no contact at all?

[Ally]

Not no contact, but we don't really. We don't talk. But like, yesterday I was like, hey, I just canceled hippies. I was. I. It was like a whole brand deal thing, and I was on count and I was like, canceled that. So, like, you need to reorder his food. And he was like, okay, thanks.

[Nick Viall]

Are you at all nervous about what he's going to think about you doing this interview? Because.

[Ally]

Yeah, I've been very critical of him. A little nervous about that. Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

Nervous in what way, though?

[Ally]

I just know that he's not going to be happy, but.

[Nick Viall]

Yeah, not your problem.

[Ally]

Not your problem, right?

[Nick Viall]

Is that tough to believe?

[Ally]

Yeah, I just feel a little like. I don't know. I think he has strong feelings about things, but. Yeah, it's not.

[Natalie]

Does he want you to just not talk about the relationship? The flaws, the imperfection? Probably he just doesn't want any of that kind of aired out.

[Ally]

But even when we were together, he never really wanted us to do podcasts and things. Yeah. So, I don't know. I think that he. When he listens to. I mean, I'm not saying. I'm saying the truth and, like, everything that he already knows too.

[Nick Viall]

So, I mean, I think honestly, you're being very gracious.

[Ally]

Thank you.

[Nick Viall]

You're being honest. But there's a clear sense that you care about this man. And there's a clear sense that you're not trying to kick him while he's down or just shit on him to benefit yourself. I mean, yeah, we obviously wanted to have you on and we wanted to talk about this, but it's not like you were knocking on our door and trying to be like, oh, I got a story to Tell now. You've been incredibly gracious and, honestly, incredibly protective of him. I hope he actually sees that and appreciates that, because to Natalie's point, like, you were in this relationship and you have a story to tell, and you kind of have been living in his shadow, you know?

[Ally]

Yeah. Yeah. That's crazy. He was with me. So the night before, like, that night that everything happened to, like, that week was such a high and obviously such a low. I had three of my biggest job opportunities, like, ever, obviously, doing Kathy Hilton's birth chart for the party, and then for Starstruck, for my podcast. We filmed the very first episode the night before Kathy's party with James, obviously, like, he was going to be my first guest. So, like, that was so exciting. And then the Kathy thing, and then to just. And then I had something else the next day, and then to just have also, like, the astrology of December. I was telling James, like, leading up to it, I was like, hey, the astrology for both of us is really bad for December. So, like, if we're meant to be together, we will make it through December, and if not, we won't. I gave him so many warnings, guys. Literally.

[Nick Viall]

I was like, you literally told him that?

[Ally]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Natalie]

It's crazy.

[Ally]

Yeah. And my friends knew, too. My makeup artist, Anais, was with me for those nights because I had so many events going on. She was like, ally. Like, the next day, she was like, well, actually, she didn't know about it until the world did because I didn't say anything, but she was, like, texting me, like, that's crazy. You literally called that. Because I didn't know what was gonna happen, but I just knew that, like, the astrology was crazy. It was all happening in my seventh house, which is the house of relationships, and in his 10th house, which is, like, reputation. So I was telling him, too, like, hey, be on your best behavior. Damn, that's crazy.

[Nick Viall]

Did he ever, in his manic states, verbally threaten you at all?

[Ally]

No, it was more of just, like, insults.

[Nick Viall]

That tracks.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

Like, if we've seen it on tv.

[Ally]

Exactly.

[Nick Viall]

We've experienced that. Did it almost make it less bad in your head because you had seen it on TV in a weird way? Does that make sense?

[Ally]

That does make sense. And yeah. Yeah. Cause there's this. He's done it before. I've seen him do it before. Where, like, if you don't see that, like, even for, like, Raquel. I mean, she saw it with Kristin, but, like, from Kristin's perspective. Yeah. That had to have been Harder, because it's like, she doesn't know that, like, to her, like, it's her problem. Like, he's lashing out at her. But it's like, okay, this has been such a pattern of this man, this boy. So, like, okay, this is his problem. Like, you know, I don't take it personally.

[Natalie]

I was in a very abusive relationship, different from yours. It was very physical and would get verbal at times, but it occurred mostly when he was on some sort of drug or alcohol or whatever it may be, but not all the time. And there was a lot of the, like, morning after of the apologies and the love bombing and the promises and all of those things which ultimately did leave lead me to stay every single time. And the only reason that I was able to finally get out of this relationship was that it had gotten so bad. Police were called. And I think when police are called, it's kind of a wake up call, you know, it makes things seem very real.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Natalie]

Because a lot of the time it was like, what I'm doing is making him do this to me. Like, it's my problem. You know, if I fix this, then this won't happen anymore. And then when police show up, it's like, oh, wait, no. Like, what he's doing is illegal.

[Ally]

Totally.

[Natalie]

Like, he can be arrested. And so I am so grateful that police showed up that day to save me from that relationship. Is there a part of you that is, like, grateful that the police showed up that day?

[Ally]

Yep. Yeah, I do. I agree with you. I think that it would have just. The cycle would have continued. I already know that it did. I had an event the next day, woke up, all my friends were like, oh, where's James? I'm like, oh, he has food poisoning. No, he was in an AA meeting. Like, and I felt so guilty. But, like, the things that we do to, like, protect them because we feel bad is crazy.

[Natalie]

I think there's also a sense of, like, embarrassment almost of, like, I wasn't raised to let a man treat me this way.

[Ally]

Yep. Single mother. I know you're very close with your mom too. Single mom, like, yeah. So that's very independent.

[Natalie]

Yeah. And so it was like, I had all these people telling me, like, I don't get weird vibes from him. I don't like the way he says certain things to you. Like, maybe he's not your person. And it would, like, lead me into him harder because I think I was embarrassed to finally admit that I was allowing this to happen to me.

[Ally]

Yeah. Relatable. It's Crazy. And being on the other side, I feel like. I mean, it's only been, what, three months? But there's still so much that I need to process, and still so much where I'm like, oh, that was abusive behavior. Like, that's not okay. So it's being on the other side. It does feel freeing, for sure. And I am grateful that that happened, because it is. Yeah, I think I probably would have stayed. And then the cycle continues. Yeah, it does.

[Nick Viall]

Do you think James has acknowledged or accepted that in addition to getting sober and working on his sobriety, that he has some other work to do with regards to his treatment towards women or how he handles himself in relationship? That, like you said, I mean, there's all. There's all different forms of abuse, you know, and obviously, the physical is maybe often the most damaging and most dangerous. But do you think he acknowledges that or sees that?

[Ally]

I don't know. I really don't know. I hope so. I mean, I always said, too, like, the alcohol, like, the substances would bring out this monster, but, like, there's. That's still within you. So, like, you need to do deeper work. And I always was trying to get him into therapy. He would go for a couple weeks and then get too busy, and then, you know, life was great again for a month. And it was just always. Yeah, I was always like, there's something deeper. I would always try to get him, like, to get a brain scan or to, like, go get tested. And I think that. I do think he. I know he did a program. I forget what it's called, but it's basically where, like, boys become men. Where he, like, went camping, which. I'm sorry. It's just so funny. I'm like, James, camping is. He has to sleep with, like, a Four Seasons pillow. It's just really funny. But so he. He's putting in work, but, like, I don't know if he. I don't know.

[Natalie]

So your mom came to get you that night or the morning after?

[Ally]

It was like, a few days after, yeah.

[Natalie]

Okay. What was that kind of conversation like with your mom?

[Ally]

Basically, like, well. Well, it was around Christmas, so they were actually going to be. My. My family was going to be coming and staying with us at her house. They were going to be coming, like, five days after all this happened. Anyway, so my mom, I think she did fly out, though, earlier, but she was like, you're getting an Airbnb. I don't care. Like, you don't have to think about what you guys are gonna do right now. Just like, please just get out and, like, let's do Christmas there. And at first I was, like, against it. I was still living in the house with James, and he was like, what? No. Like, I'm so glad, like, that I did the Airbnb, and my mom ended up staying with me in that Airbnb in Larchmont for a month. And it was just so good. Like, I mean, it was not good. It was sad. It was, like, totally just a month of, like, healing and, like, processing everything and, like. But it was necessary for sure.

[Nick Viall]

Another person I've been very critical of as relates to the story is Lisa Vanderpump. Oh, who you think I was gonna.

[Ally]

Say, I'm glad I did it. Same thought you were gonna say.

[Nick Viall]

Yeah. Are you familiar with the statement she eventually made regarding the situation?

[Ally]

Yes.

[Nick Viall]

Did you have any feelings about it? Because it kind of felt like at the end that she. What? I think her statement basically was kind of suggesting that, like, you blew it out of proportion, which to me, felt a little icky and dirty because she has a long history, especially with James.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

Clearly there's, like, a family connection there and things like that. I just thought that was kind of gross on her part, but maybe I'm not, you know, understanding the full context of why she made the statement that she made.

[Ally]

All I'll say she called me and she did make sure, like, are you okay? I mean, this was, like, two months later, but she called and made sure she called you. Two months later, maybe, or a month, I don't know.

[Nick Viall]

Certainly not the next day.

[Ally]

Certainly not the next day. But she. Yeah, she called and checked in on me and. And then just. Yeah, she's very protective over James, and I get it, because I was, too, for a long time. Like, it's very. Mother.

[Natalie]

You were in love with them.

[Ally]

Yeah. Who's in love with it? Right? That's. Yeah. I think that they, like, she feels. Protect it like a mother almost to him. And I thought that was really weird at first when I first got on the show. Then I kind of started to understand it a little more. But, yeah, she. She was basically like, ally, like, he needs you. Like, you would. You're really good together. I don't think that, like. Yeah. Like.

[Natalie]

So she was trying to convince you to stay with him even after learning that he.

[Ally]

Yeah. Yeah. She was like, you should go travel with him to his shows this weekend. I'm like, first of all, what shows? He's canceled right now. And also. No, I just moved into an apartment. I. We're not together. But it was really weird because on the call, I was kind of like, I'm. I was, like, weak in the moment, you know? And I'm like, like, did I make the wrong. You know what I mean? Like, questioning everything.

[Nick Viall]

Do you think James asked her to make that call?

[Ally]

I don't know. I really don't know. Yeah, Yuck. I don't know. It was. Yeah, I called. I called some friends after, and I'm glad I did because I didn't. I didn't even tell my mom this because she would have just been so upset. But, like, I called a bunch of friends after and, like, told them everything she said, and they were like, no, like, that's. She's a producer. That's her trying to literally, quite literally produce and, like, get you guys back together. So, like, that's. I don't know. I don't know why. Yeah. And then it was a lot of like, well, you were drinking, too, and.

[Nick Viall]

She said that to you.

[Natalie]

Do you feel like you need to protect Lisa Vanderpump in this moment?

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

Or you. Or is it more? Are you afraid of Lisa Vanderpump?

[Ally]

I'm not afraid.

[Nick Viall]

You're not afraid?

[Ally]

No, I'm not afraid. I think there's a piece of that world that, like, I'm not afraid. I. I just. I don't really want to. I don't know what. What am I feeling?

[Natalie]

What are you feeling?

[Ally]

What am I feeling, you guys? I don't know either. It's like, I'm not scared of her because, like, what would she do? But also, like, there is a part of me that still feels like I still respect her in some way, which maybe I shouldn't. Yeah. I don't know. Probably not. Probably shouldn't. It's probably should just be like, whatever it is.

[Nick Viall]

Like, listen, I. You have a more intimate relationship with her. I don't even have a relationship with her. My only experience meeting her was awesome and lovely.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

And she was kind. She's great and great.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

You know, and there's a lot of reasons why it's easy to be a fan of hers and just, like, everything. Right. So it. Even for me, just even being critical or on the show feels it kind of like.

[Ally]

Yeah, it feels wrong.

[Nick Viall]

I don't. Why. You know? Like, I know maybe I'm even speaking out of. Maybe I'm speaking on things I don't realize.

[Ally]

Right.

[Nick Viall]

I don't know. And yada, yada. So I couldn't even imagine what it's like to Be in your shoes.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

But it does feel real. That phone call sounds like it was a real wrong. Like a bat. Like it. That shouldn't have happened. It feels like. And I feel like you shouldn't have been put in that place at a time in which you were maybe the most vulnerable.

[Ally]

Yeah. No, I agree. I agree looking back, because I thought it was sweet. Oh, she's calling to check in. And then it, like, took talking to friends to realize that that wasn't. Like, she doesn't care.

[Natalie]

So was she, like, trying to ultimately, like, blame the night on, like, it wasn't just James. It was you two kind of thing.

[Ally]

It felt like, you guys are young. This is what happens when people drink. Ken was also a playboy and naughty when we were younger, and I had to whip him into shape. Like, it was giving a little massage. You know, it was a little, like, that era. It's like, okay, kind of a little misogynistic, but she was like, you're gonna. She was like. She was like, honestly, this is kind of iconic, but she was like, you're gonna kiss a lot of frogs, and you're gonna marry a frog, too. That's just the way that it is. I was like, that's so depressing, Lisa.

[Nick Viall]

That doesn't have to be that.

[Ally]

No, it doesn't. I don't want to marry a frog.

[Nick Viall]

Well, I mean, listen, like, I don't know. Like, hey, we all have our flaws. Like, you know, in a lot of ways, I'm a frog, but it's just, like, if we're talking metaphorically, but, like, some frogs aren't abusive.

[Ally]

I love Princess and the frog. I. I don't know. I feel like also, that call, it just goes so deep, and that whole cast goes so deep. And, like, that's why also, it's like, I can see clearly a little bit more than everyone else. I don't know where it's like that, but even though I. No, I actually couldn't because I needed friends to really be like, Alli. That was wrong. That conversation was wrong.

[Natalie]

Did you feel supported by the rest of Vanderpump cast? When the news broke and there were paparazzi photos of you moving out of his house, did you feel supported by them, or did you kind of feel like no one really wanted to speak on the situation?

[Ally]

I felt supported. Okay. Yeah. I mean, by the woman. Like. Yeah, like, Sheena, obviously. Yes. Lala was the first one to text me, and her text was really sweet because it helped. Literally, she texted me, like, two seconds after I saw like an article. So, like my. I was just like, fuck. And it was basically like, like, hey, I've been here. Like, turn your phone off and just take care of yourself today. Call me whenever you're ready. Like, it was helpful. I was like, okay.

[Nick Viall]

It felt like she was being a real friend.

[Ally]

Exactly. Yeah. And, yeah. And Ariana and Katie too, reached out. I didn't really talk. I mean, I don't even know if I replied. I didn't really. Like, I really tried to stay off my phone, but they. I felt the support. Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

James running into Andrew Tate.

[Ally]

Oh.

[Nick Viall]

Felt like at the time, like the most appropriate bad karma.

[Ally]

Yep.

[Nick Viall]

You know, in a way, like, like, what was the. How did you hear about that? And then what it just. What is your general opinion about that situation? He's obviously come out and acted like he didn't know anything about them and what they stood for. That's very difficult to believe. Even if he didn't know, like, why did he want to take pictures with the. You know, it's just like.

[Ally]

Yeah. You know my thought though, he, like. And again, I'm not defending him, but just like, knowing how his brain works. Like, he wouldn't have posted that if he thought the, like, it was gonna get. Do you know what I mean? Like, he was already in the hot seat. Like, he's already basically canceled. Like, I genuinely think that he is a little slow and was not. I don't think that he really knew the extent of them. I think he probably knew, like, oh, what Bitcoin or like, whatever. They. I don't know. But I don't think he would have posted that.

[Nick Viall]

Honestly, that kind of does make sense.

[Ally]

Like, why, like, why would he if he knew? Like, he's just a little.

[Nick Viall]

That's honestly the best offensive for him.

[Ally]

Get it? Which is also a problem. Which. Yeah, yeah, okay, that does make sense.

[Natalie]

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[Nick Viall]

A new show out.

[Ally]

Yay.

[Nick Viall]

Came out last week, second episode's out today.

[Ally]

Yes.

[Nick Viall]

It's all, no surprise about horoscopes. Our audience loves horoscopes. Like, so I'm not gonna ask you why'd you start this podcast, but like give give our audience a little bit of glimpse of what they can expect and then I believe we're gonna give them a little preview.

[Ally]

Love.

[Nick Viall]

You're gonna, you're gonna do with us what you do on your show.

[Ally]

Yes. So basically, I love astrology and doing people's birth charts. I love being able to get into.

[Nick Viall]

It in the first place.

[Ally]

I was like always kind of just that girl. Like, I was always into it even as a child. Like, I guess spiritual, but like, I just loved all that kind of stuff.

[Nick Viall]

Let's call myself a skeptic.

[Ally]

Yes.

[Nick Viall]

Okay. I'm just kind of generally a skeptic. But like, how did you. Because for you it goes a lot deeper than reading a daily horoscope. Right. Or just like knowing what your sign is and things like that. It is something that you really. It's a compass for you.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

You know.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

So can you explain to me and just the audience, like what value you get out of it and then why to you or why it should be to anyone more than just like a punchline or like, some kind of voodoo, a party trick or whatever.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

And that, you know, it's. Yeah. Why? Why is it more than that?

[Ally]

You know, I love astrology because I don't even have the answer to that. It's, like this whole mysterious thing that blows my mind every time I do birth chart reading, and I do use it as a compass. I use it as a tool. I use it as a guide. I've gotten a lot better. I do not, like, live my life based off of it. I do believe in free will, but I also believe in, like, fixed fate. And I think we all have a destiny that we play out. And the birth chart shows us that. It's like, these are your strengths. These are your weaknesses, and that's okay. Like, we can't all be perfect. And, you know, we all have our little things, but it tells you so much about yourself. So, like, you not only get to learn more about you, but also, like, your partner and your friends, people. We're all so interconnected, and astrology just proves that. And, like, that's why I'm obsessed with it. Okay, awesome. Does that make sense?

[Natalie]

I'm excited. You did mine, you did Nyx, and you also did Rivers.

[Ally]

Yes. And I love Rivers. You guys, she's a libra rising, which I'm looking at, dad, because, like, she's gonna have. I know that you're a Libra.

[Nick Viall]

She'd be like me.

[Ally]

But she's a. You guys do have. They do have a lot of similar traits, but don't worry. No, no, no. I knew. I knew you weren't gonna say that.

[Natalie]

But my chin, she. And my big.

[Nick Viall]

Much like me. I say, like, river has my looks, but now he's beauty.

[Ally]

Oh, that's.

[Natalie]

Yeah, but it's true, because she looks.

[Nick Viall]

A lot like me. But, like, I. But, like, I.

[Ally]

You know, I remember when you had her, and you were saying, like, the family was like, oh, my gosh, she looks like Nick. And you're like, stop. No, I birthed her.

[Natalie]

I just carried her for nine months and pushed her.

[Nick Viall]

She's so beautiful in a way that I just. It doesn't come from me.

[Ally]

Well, she's a libra rising, so she's literally going to be beautiful forever, and she's going to.

[Nick Viall]

What do you mean by that?

[Ally]

Okay, so the rising sign, that is your energy. Like, that is absolutely how you move through life. Like our sun sign. So, like, you're a Libra Sun. That's who we're becoming. That's who we want to be. That's where we feel our best and where we feel confident. So, like, think of it like that. But the rising sign, that's really how we move. That's how other people view you. It's your motivation for living. So when we have a Libra rising, she is ruled by Venus. So that is the planet of beauty and love and art and history. And, like, she's charming. She's going to be so diplomatic. Basically, everyone is going to be obsessed with her, and she's going to have a lot of lovers and boyfriends. So that's why I looked at Dad. I was like, sorry, dad.

[Natalie]

Whoa.

[Ally]

She's gonna be really popular.

[Nick Viall]

But will she. Will people respect or. Well, I'm gonna ask you a question. Would you rather be liked or respected?

[Ally]

So I'm a Libra moon, Capricorn sun. So that is a great question, because I want both, okay?

[Nick Viall]

Because I definitely want my kids to be more respected than, like.

[Ally]

Of course, yeah.

[Nick Viall]

Even feared.

[Ally]

Respected. Of course. Respected. Yeah, yeah. And it's the Libra placement that's. It's kind of funny you say that because their whole, like, lesson, every sign has their thing. And with Libras, it is like, eventually they learn, okay, everybody does like you and want to be around you, but you have to learn that you don't have space and room for everyone at the table. You have to set boundaries, and you get to be picky of who you allow. And that goes for you, too, as a Libra sun. But you've probably learned that over time.

[Nick Viall]

Okay? So before we get into our charts, I need astrology for dummies, okay? I don't even know all the signs, so there's that.

[Ally]

You're kidding me.

[Nick Viall]

No.

[Ally]

No.

[Nick Viall]

And I have no idea what a rising or a falling or a moon or a sun is, okay? And why they're important.

[Ally]

Okay?

[Natalie]

And there's like, someone's in seventh house and someone's in their 10th house.

[Nick Viall]

You give us the. The basics of all this and why. Yeah, why? Why astrology is what it is, and where does it even come from?

[Ally]

So I studied Hellenistic astrology, and it dates. Dates back. I mean, before Christianity. I mean, astrologers, they were the mathematicians of the day. They were the astronomers. Right? Like, that's literally where it all began, is, like, looking up at the sky and patterns. It's all patterns. It's just, like, interesting because the way that astrology, like, the history of it, it's had peaks, obviously, like the 60s, right? Like, peace. And, like, there's, like, moments in history where it like, comes back and then it always goes away again. And it always.

[Nick Viall]

But anyway, like, where are we now in the history of astrologer?

[Ally]

I think it's gonna stay. But then again, Neptune just went into Aries, which I'm a little worried about. I'm a little weird. But anyway, anyway, the first astrologer woman was burned at the stake. Isn't that crazy? Because it was like a men thing. And the kings, like, all the kings had the right hand. Men. It was like the astrologers. Anyway, so that's, like, where it was formed. But basically there's a bunch of different types of astrology as well. But natal astrology is the moment you were born. So that's why that birth time and location matters. So it basically calculates the points. It's mathematical. I can't do that, by the way. We have, like, software that does that. Obviously not a mathematician. But then.

[Nick Viall]

And like, being born at, like, noon versus 1205. How. How different can that.

[Ally]

It can change by up to four minutes. Usually doesn't. But like, say, okay, say like we put 4pm for you. But like, say your mom comes back and is like, oh, 7:00am like, it'll change. Okay, we'll be looking at a different.

[Nick Viall]

But if it was like, oh, it turns out now it's 3:56, not 4.

[Ally]

Yeah, we might be fine. The degrees will change a little. So, like, you do want to get as specific as you can. But basically, like, and this is what it looks like. It's. It's basically a snapshot of the sky at the exact moment in time you were born. So I think of it as a cosmic blueprint for life. Like, there's a lot in here that you have already.

[Nick Viall]

Honestly, it seems cooler than a birth certificate. Yeah, because it's like, totally date and time.

[Ally]

That's true. Everyone should just get one of these when they're born. That's so funny. That actually makes it, like, to get.

[Natalie]

A passport, they should be like, don't bring your birth certificate. Bring your birth chart.

[Ally]

I'm like, why isn't the government using astrology to solve crime? They probably are. Nancy Reagan had an astrologer in office.

[Nick Viall]

Really?

[Ally]

Yeah. After Ronald Reagan got shot the first time, she was so nervous and she loved him so much that she had an astrologer come in.

[Natalie]

Wow.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

All right, so what's. What's. What's your. Okay, give me the basics. Like, what's a. Right. What is it?

[Ally]

So your rising sign is.

[Nick Viall]

What is a rising sign?

[Ally]

It's also known as Your ascendant. And basically, it is the first. It's the first house. House number one. That's where Nick was born. So Nick was born right here and he entered the world. And the first energy that you ever met or, like, came into contact with was actually Aquarius, which is why you're so. James is an Aquarius. Sorry. Drawing comparisons. But I'm saying in the way that, like, you.

[Nick Viall]

Here we go.

[Natalie]

Sorry, sorry.

[Ally]

You both, like. You know how James marches to the beat of his own drums and he says what he wants and he does do that. Doesn't care about being liked, which Libras usually do. But because you're an Aquarius rising, you have an edge to you where you're like, I'm doing my own thing in this lifetime. Like, it's fine. I can break the rules a little bit. Okay, so you're an Aquarius rising. So that's how you move through life. Very innovative. Very, like, creative, outspoken. But you're here. Aquarius is, like, very humanitarian. And they're, like, here to shake up systems and to evolve, basically. So that's your rising sign. Also, if you're ever reading your horoscope, read for Aquarius, not Libra.

[Nick Viall]

What does that mean?

[Ally]

Nick, when you're reading Cosmopolitan magazine in the mornings and you're going to the horoscope section, read for Aquarius.

[Nick Viall]

Okay. Read for Aquarius. Is that a common mistake people must make all the time?

[Ally]

Yeah. Because horoscope is Greek four hour marker. So it's all about the rising sign, not the sun. You can still read for the sun and your moon sign because those are still, like, really big placements in our chart. But for timing, which is, like, why people usually look at horoscopes. Like, what can I expect this month? Read for your rising sign.

[Natalie]

Okay.

[Ally]

Yep.

[Natalie]

That's a good note.

[Nick Viall]

I didn't even know Aquarius was a sign.

[Ally]

That's crazy.

[Natalie]

That's what river is.

[Ally]

That's crazy. Yeah, that's your daughter, literally. Oh, I did. Wait, I'm so. And she's a Libra rising, so. See what I'm saying?

[Nick Viall]

I always heard about Geminis, you know, and I knew I was a Libra.

[Ally]

You know, and river is a Libra rising. Aquarius sun. So you guys are switched.

[Nick Viall]

What does that mean?

[Ally]

That just means you guys are going to get each other on, like, a really deeper level. Have a really strong connection, like always. Sorry, Natalie. I know. Wait, let's see. Okay, wait. But also.

[Natalie]

Wait, let's see if there's anything that connects Natalie to her daughter.

[Ally]

Hold on, let me flip through some pages.

[Natalie]

If river is yours, literally, like, actually, I think Nick birthed her. I'm gonna be honest here. That's what I'm coming to my conclusion.

[Ally]

No, no, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I am looking, though.

[Natalie]

No, take your time, actually, take all the time you need.

[Ally]

But wait, before we do leave, Nick, I did want to tell you, though. This is cool. Mercury is the planet of communication and storytelling speaking. You have it at 28 degrees in the ninth house. The ninth house is where we see publishing, sharing your wisdom with the world. The ninth house is the student and the teacher. And that's where we see authors. That's where we see motivational speakers or people who just have a strong voice in society. So you have Mercury conjunct your sun and Saturn. Basically, you just have a lot of energy in your ninth house. So it makes sense with your career path and being opinionated and having a powerful voice, writing a book.

[Natalie]

I should have never have made it as an accountant.

[Ally]

No, no, no, no.

[Nick Viall]

I sat down like, I hate this fucking job. That was my major.

[Ally]

I was gonna say, but you would be good at it. Aquarius is the smartest sign.

[Nick Viall]

I mean, I was smart, but my brain did not. It's like, this isn't for you.

[Ally]

Libra in the ninth, too, is just like. It's very. Well, it wants to travel and learn about deeper life stuff. The ninth house is always just a big question mark. What is the meaning of life? And it's Libra. So it has that relationship theme. Because Libra is the sign of relationships.

[Nick Viall]

All I knew about Libras is that it's a sign of balance or something like that.

[Ally]

Yeah, it is the sign of the scales balancing. It's the idea that we're meant to balance ourself, like our soul with another. So it's balance between the two. With Libra, I think two is better than one. It really loves partnership.

[Natalie]

And is that partner like a Virgo?

[Ally]

And the partner is a Virgo. He has Jupiter in Virgo. Which means that when you guys met, it probably did feel like almost like you guys have met before in another lifetime.

[Nick Viall]

Okay.

[Ally]

It was just a, like, very, very magnetic attraction. And it's in the eighth house. So, like, the sexual chemistry, it was like. Yeah, you guys were just like, oh.

[Nick Viall]

My God, it was popping.

[Ally]

I'm obsessed with.

[Natalie]

You can conc. Concur. Okay.

[Ally]

Okay.

[Natalie]

Great.

[Ally]

This is fun. You also have Venus conjunct the north node, which the nodes are not a planet, obviously. But they're a point that represent our purpose. And you have that conjunct Venus, which means in this lifetime, it's quite literally your. Like, I'm not telling you what your purpose is, but that's your path. Like, your soul is here to literally understand, like, people and relationships. Do you believe in astrology now?

[Natalie]

Yeah, literally, it's.

[Nick Viall]

Listen, I.

[Ally]

We're getting there.

[Nick Viall]

The more. What I love about these conversations is because, like, I think, you know, astrology, like you mentioned, it's easy to mock or make fun of, but, like, they're clear. Like, there is a science behind it.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

And I, and I say this as someone who's grown up, very religious.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

Very Catholic. And I mean no disrespect to my Christian audience members, but, like, there is a level of faith, you know, if you're, if you're Catholic, you learn about faith.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

And you learn the power of believing in something greater than yourself.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

You know, we believe in God and there's a certain faith, and it's just kind of like, well, what's the difference between that and astrology? There's a level of faith in believing in something outside of yourself, obviously.

[Ally]

Also, sorry to add to that because I get asked this a lot and I just want to say that you can have both too. I wouldn't even say astrology is like my faith. I believe in a higher power. I'm very spiritual. But this is. Again, it's like I use it as a map. I use it as a tool. Like, you can still, like.

[Nick Viall]

Yeah. Why does. It's like they shouldn't butt heads or, you know, in a sense, because, like, listen, if God exists, he gave us the stars. He also gave us whatever ability to understand them, you know, type of thing.

[Ally]

Totally.

[Nick Viall]

And you know, for me, like, I, I have a vast appreciation as someone who, like, no longer, like, actively goes to church. And I'm not that religious anymore, but I had a really great experience personally.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

And other people didn't like growing up. Cathol.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

As I've gotten out into the world and met other people, whether it be Jewish or Muslim or atheist, like, I've just learned about other people, other belief systems, and I just have an immense respect for them and what they believe in. And the idea that I could sit there and say, my God is better than yours or. It just felt so ignorant and so, like, I just have a huge respect for faith in general because if God exists and we don't know, you know what I'm saying?

[Ally]

Like, it's Also, for listeners that do know astrology, I just have to let you know that Nick has a stellium in the ninth house. So literally everything you're saying is. Is so on par with your chart. The ninth house is the house of religion, belief systems, faith, questioning it all. Because you're like, you're very aware that there's more out there, but you're like, you're just on a journey to understand it. Like, not that you need to know everything, but you're just curious. Like, that's the ninth house, and you have four planets there. So that just means there's a lot of energy in that area of life for you.

[Nick Viall]

All right, tell me about my wife.

[Ally]

Okay.

[Natalie]

She's like doomsday.

[Ally]

Absolutely not. No. I am obsessed with Natalie's chart. So you're a Virgo.

[Natalie]

I am.

[Ally]

Which love? I love Virgos. I love Virgo women.

[Natalie]

Our second baby that we lost was supposed to be a Virgo. And I was, like, so excited because I was, like, planning. I'm like this. I'm like, our next baby has to be a Virgo because I'm a Virgo. And, like, we need another.

[Ally]

Another Mercury. Another Virgo, another Mercury.

[Natalie]

Anytime I meet a fellow Virgo, I'm like, I'm obsessed with you.

[Ally]

Actually, can we talk about that for a minute? Are you comfortable talking about that? So the fifth house. This house here real quick. This is the house of children. And you have your moon there. And I just want to let you know, because, like, the moon, it's the most important planet. It's how we mother. It's how we nurture. It's how we feel safe. It's how we regulate our emotions. So wherever the moon lives in our birth chart, that is an area that we have to nurture. It's the most important area, and you have it in your fifth house of children, which means quite literally. Also, not everybody who has this placement needs to be a mother, but that was probably always a really strong desire for you. And the moon is a wave, so there's always highs and lows. It controls the ocean tides.

[Natalie]

I just crying.

[Nick Viall]

No, I didn't actually. Well, anyone who says nice things about my life, I just cry.

[Ally]

She just cries. Oh, that's so sweet. See, Leo, Lisa, she didn't marry a frog.

[Natalie]

See, I do. I have always said I feel like I was put on this Earth to be a mom.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Natalie]

So that does make sense.

[Ally]

And also, just the moon experiences all range of emotions wherever we all have the Moon somewhere and we. You can look at a chart and be like, okay, that's an area that is going to be emotional because that's the moon. So because you have the moon in the fifth house, it's going to feel the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. So I just want, like, even, like, the experience that you just had, just trusting, like, you have. River, there's still, like, so, so much nurturing that you're meant to do in this lifetime. Like, you are a mother. Like, that's just. I don't know. So I just wanted you to know that because there's absolutely. If you guys are going to try again, too, the moon in the fifth house is, like, that's a special spot for you. Yay, children.

[Natalie]

Okay.

[Ally]

Yay. Also, you're just going to be a great mom in general. Like, even with river and your friends, you know? Yeah. Okay. But then you're a Virgo sun and you have your son in the second house. The second house is the house of work hard, play hard. Like, we like nice things in the second house. This is where we, like, eat the fine food, drink the fine wine, travel, luxury.

[Nick Viall]

Is there anything about purses in there?

[Ally]

Pursed? Yes. This is where purses live, literally. And it's in Virgo. So, like, also, Earth sign. Love the green, like, earth energy, especially Virgo. It's just very timely, classic, head on your shoulders, like, loyal and just, like, hardworking. But play like, that's the thing with the second house, is it really? And so the sun is where we shine. So I'm glad that you, like, also, just, by the way, you have Leo. Mercury. Leo. Mercury is like, I'm performing. I'm on Broadway. Okay. Like, you are a star, Natalie. Literally, you are a star. You have Venus also in Leo, and you have Mars in Leo, and it's all in your first house of being seen in this lifetime. So, like, I don't know. I just. What does that mean? I think you're meant to be, like, a movie star.

[Nick Viall]

Oh, listen, I've been saying since I met her, she's the real star in this liter.

[Ally]

Yeah. Like, yeah.

[Natalie]

And my chart is here to prove it.

[Ally]

I think you were always. Definitely even, like, being in la. I always call, like, Leo, like, the New York City sign. Like, it's pulling you out into the world. But Leos, they just want to make people happy. They enjoy performing, they enjoy art.

[Nick Viall]

There was a. A. An article covering the most recent miscarriage, and the headline was, nick Bile's wife talks about the miscarriage. And I said to her, natalie, in like, unless six to 12 months will be the last time anyone ever refers to her.

[Ally]

Love that.

[Nick Viall]

Mark my words. Mark it down. People now is going to be like, yeah, a real big deal.

[Ally]

No, like, I literally, when I pulled up your chart, because I honestly was expecting you to have some Leo somewhere. But like, it's you. I was like, okay, attracts. Yeah. Like you are. You are really here to shine in this lifetime. Like, that's your rising sign. So she's a Leo rising. So like everywhere you go, it's as if you think of you as like, you're the sun because Leo's ruled by the sun.

[Natalie]

The world revolves around me.

[Ally]

No, revolves around you, literally. And you just make people feel happy and warm and like they want to be in the sun.

[Natalie]

See, haters. I'm not a raging state.

[Ally]

She's not.

[Nick Viall]

I mean, when Allie walks in her room, she's. She's magnetic.

[Ally]

She is magnetic. No, like, the first time even meeting you, it makes sense because I just remember being like, oh my God, you're so beautiful and just easy to talk to. And also being in the sun and just being in warmth is important to you too.

[Natalie]

Yes. I do love the change.

[Ally]

What else is fun? Okay, you have Jupiter in Pisces in your eighth house. That's very intuitive. Jupiter is the planet of expansion and opportunities. But wherever Jupiter is in our birth chart, that's where we have natural gifts and talents. Balance. And the eighth house is. I call it the haunted house because that's where we go into the most. People don't want to go into the haunted house, but if you have a placement in the 8th, it's like you want to go in or you're going in regardless, so you might as well enjoy it. It's where we do see some clairvoyancey psychic abilities, very spiritual, also therapy and healing. So being able to just even do stuff like this and talk deeper and have deeper connections, you're going deep in this life too.

[Nick Viall]

Time.

[Ally]

But always trust your intuition. Wow. Yeah. Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

What else can you tell us about our daughter future?

[Natalie]

He's like, that's enough about Natalie. Wrap it up.

[Ally]

And wrap it up.

[Natalie]

I'm just kidding.

[Ally]

Oh, I was going to say too, but Jupiter in the 8th, the 8th house. I call it the haunted house because there is like, it can feel unfair. That's where we can see things like abusive relationships, trauma, death. Like, I have a lot of planets in the eighth house too. And like, I lost my dad when I was younger. The eighth house is where we kind of have to Experience, like, the shit end of the stick sometimes, but we grow from it. And like that why I.

[Natalie]

So much trauma?

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

Natalie's got some trauma.

[Ally]

Yeah. It's a gift, though. Like, eventually.

[Nick Viall]

So let me ask you this. Like, and this might get into the kind of voodooy type of thing, but, like, N has a lot of trauma from her childhood. Very. All sorts of upness.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

And you're reading her chart based off of, like, information when she was born. If you were reading this, how do I ask this question? I want to be very careful how I ask this question. What part of it is like, what did you say? The. The plan. Destiny or something versus, like, you know. You know what I'm saying? I don't want to suggest it's like, oh, it's. Something's in your. This house and some bad shit's gonna. It's like, you know, how do you grapple with that? You know what I'm saying?

[Ally]

And by the way, no, that's such a good cause for people watching. If they're like, oh, I have Jupiter in the 8th House, or is my parent gonna die? It's like, no, I've seen plenty of people with eighth house placements that have not experienced that.

[Nick Viall]

Or is it like, did that bad shit happen because of my chart? Almost, in a way, yeah.

[Ally]

That's kind of the fun debate of astrology where it's like, we can sit there. And that's why also, every astrologer has a different take. And I believe in positive thinking. Right. And, like, putting good energy out into the world. So, like, I always try to view everything is like. Like the first thing I said, oh, my God, you have Jupiter in the 8th. Like, you're really intuitive. Like, the good things are first. But then it's like, okay, I remember what we were just talking about. And I'm like, let's be real, though. The eighth house comes with a bit of cobwebs. That's why it's the haunted house. It's like, it's a little dark. But Jupiter naturally is such a positive planet that it's like whatever you go through is going to benefit your life in some way later on, whether that's like, you're able to help other people or whatever. And also, like, even from your own childhood, like, whenever we see you have the sun in the second house conjunct the north node, our purpose point, it's like you were always very independent and almost had to parent yourself and, like, be your own strength. Yeah. And again with the moon in the Fifth house, Right? Because like, that you're in your motherhood journey. But, like, when you were a child, you still had your moon in the fifth house, which can look like mothering yourself and having to, like, heal your inner child. That's spooky as fuck. Isn't it crazy? No, I know sometimes I'm doing it, I'm like, I'm scared.

[Natalie]

That is really.

[Ally]

It's fun.

[Nick Viall]

I know you want to. We like a positive spin, but what can you tell us from our charts, if anything, about blind spots, bad habits, weaknesses, things that we might be prone to do you know what I'm saying? Does that make sense?

[Ally]

Yeah, I look at the aspects. So communication is honestly really key for both of you guys. You have. Where is Nyx Mercury? Yeah, I wish I did your guys. Synastry chart or composite chart. We can do that, though, another time.

[Nick Viall]

When we come on your show.

[Ally]

You can be hard on yourself with the work that you do. But perfectionist. You have Saturn in the 10th house, which means delays also within the working world. But Saturn is the planet of mastery. So trust that good things within your career. It takes time. Even literally, like what you just said with, like, that's not what they're gonna be calling you. And months from now is very funny because Saturn in the 10th, you're hard on yourself, but that's because you care and you want things to be good. You have the opposite. You have Mars in your 10th house. So yours is like, you're speeding through. It's like, I've got a lot to say. I'm just gonna go. And it's a little more. There's more energy there where yours is more like. Anyway, that's for career, though, though.

[Natalie]

It's like Nick does leave cabinet doors open. Nick's not going to be able to pick up his clothes and put them in the laundry hamper.

[Ally]

Wait, where is Nick? Six. Six. Well, yeah.

[Nick Viall]

So does it explain why I'm aloof or forgetful?

[Ally]

Aquarius rising and the Libra. You're very air. So Libra and Aquarius are both air signs so that the definition is literally a. Yeah, it's like we're kind of like up in the cloud clouds. And we're thinking about.

[Natalie]

It's beautiful.

[Ally]

We're thinking about a million different things.

[Nick Viall]

Guys. I'm up in the clouds.

[Ally]

It's like you're like, eating dinner. Someone's asking you about your day, and you're like, do you think that, like, aliens are real? And like, what is really.

[Nick Viall]

Like, someone could be talking to Me and they think I'm there and I'm like, I'm in outer space right now.

[Ally]

Like, yes, he's in the clouds. Yep. You know, I'm out at lunch for sure. That's. Yeah. So that's air energy and you have a lot of that. That and then you have Virgo. Right. So like in general Virgos are the organized like perfection ones. So that is probably that. That difference There are Libra and Virgos compatible, so with compatibility. Okay, this is going to be a take. I don't really believe in that. Oh, I think. Okay, well that's not true. I believe though that we're all compatible. Not in the sense that like, like obviously you're attracted to who you're attracted to but like that speaks for itself. That kind of goes back to with like we don't need to use astrology for everything.

[Nick Viall]

But it sounds like almost there's so much information we could get from these charts that there's probably with every couple points of compatibility and points of incompatibility and how any couple chooses to.

[Ally]

We can learn from it. So like you guys found each other. Now we look at the chart and we can see, okay, what can we work on and like what's great, great. You guys are both building really an empire together. You both have really lovely 10th house placements and star power. So your career is really important. But I've seen charts of people who got divorced that had beautiful compatibility and then I've seen charts of people that are still together with not thy textbook, the best compatibility. So it really just depends on how willing you are to work on yourself in the relationship. In the relationship.

[Natalie]

What can we expect from River's future?

[Nick Viall]

What are challenges? We might.

[Ally]

Might.

[Nick Viall]

Yeah. How are we compatible with our daughter and like how in what aa ways. Like we might like butt heads.

[Ally]

Honestly, she's kind of like going to parent you guys eventually. She has Saturn in the sixth house. It is in Pisces. She's very hardworking. Not yet, obviously, but like one day she will be. I feel like she's going to carry on your guys legacy, to be honest.

[Nick Viall]

I have said since she was born that, that if I would manifest it like I, I want her to be whatever she wants.

[Ally]

Whatever she wants. Right.

[Nick Viall]

As long as she's passionate about it.

[Ally]

Y.

[Nick Viall]

But like because I'm a big sports fan and obviously I do this, I talk for a living. I. I could see her being like a premier like sports woman commentator.

[Ally]

Like awesome.

[Nick Viall]

Like she's gonna like, yeah, she's gonna Be a woman in sports.

[Ally]

Well, luckily, like talking for a living. She has her son in the fifth house, which again, the sun is where we shine. And the fifth house is the house of entertainment. Movies, sports. It's like the entertainment house. So I was gonna say. But like that's just where my head goes first. Right. Is like movies. But like she could very well be an athlete. Yeah. Or have a bit of a. She's performing in some aspect. She's gonna. She's gonna do something that she enjoys.

[Nick Viall]

Okay.

[Ally]

She's not going to do probably like accounting. Like she's gonna be more in like the arts and like entertainment. Also. She's a libra rising. So they're usually just drawn to like literally poetry, beautiful things. She's gonna have such good taste that she gets. That's your second house placement. There we go.

[Natalie]

Something.

[Nick Viall]

She has excellent taste. You saw that?

[Ally]

No. Yeah, she does. Yeah. Yeah. You have the second house. Is it your moon? No sun. So yeah. And yeah, your son is in the second house. So like that's where you shine. You're proud of. I mean your guys's home is so beautiful. I remember like when I first met you and I, you would like post and I'd be like, what? How did you do that? Remember I lime washed because of you. You lime washed, didn't you?

[Natalie]

Yeah. Our guest bedrooms. Yeah. We just did our pop up studio as well.

[Ally]

I love lime wash. Me too. I was obsessed. So that was from you. That sun in the second house, it's like she shines there. So people get inspo from you and your daughter has her mirror at the second house. You brand those out there.

[Natalie]

She's just saying that I actually circling.

[Nick Viall]

Back to you, all this talk about astrology and then our previous conversation. I'm wondering how has astrology helped you through this experience and what have you learned or discovered about maybe some bad habits you have have with like just how you show up to relationships or stay in relationships and things like that.

[Ally]

Totally. So that I think I told you guys. Yeah, I was like already. I was honestly dreading last December like the previous January. Like I knew the December for James and I was going to be super telling and wild and really test our relationship. So then when everything fell apart, as sad had as, I was heartbroken. But the other part of me, and this is why I love astrology, is it does remind me like, okay, one, this is just weather. It'll pass. We always go through eclipse season and there's always crazy astrology happening and then there's always beautiful astrology happening. It's just weather. It'll pass. It was meant to be. I believe that our bird chart is all about getting in alignment with your higher good and where you're meant to be. And it's all lessons. So that mindset helps me a lot. And then with me personally, I know I have Saturn in the first house, so I do have to work on setting boundaries for myself and not, you know, and this is something like, for future ally to consider is like, slow down and like pay attention to red flags and set boundaries for yourself. Yeah. So to be a little bit more like trusting my own schedule and timing of things.

[Nick Viall]

Do you feel like your propensity to keep things positive or put a positive spin on things has clouded your judgment in the past?

[Ally]

Probably, yeah. But I honestly, like, then maybe this is wrong, but I. It's fine. I'm like, I'm like, I'm fine with it because at the end of the day, I don't really have any regrets and I want to have my best life possible. I want James to have his best life possible. And like the clarity, it's here now. So I'm grateful for that. But I think, you know, I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing to want to see the best in people, but I think it's good to be aware that you're that type of person.

[Nick Viall]

Yeah.

[Ally]

Which I am. So.

[Nick Viall]

Yeah, I mean, that's. It's only a problem with people like, oh, you're a fixer type of thing. Like, you know.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

At its core, it's a good thing, you know, because it comes with the intention of, you know, wanting to show up for your partner and do your part. The problem with fixers, and I've been that person a lot of us have, is that sometimes we show up too much. Like, we do our half, then we do their half or part of their half, and then we're always like, we're covering our ass, we're coming for their ass and things like that. And we can't really draw the line between what is. Is healthy behavior and what necessarily is well intentioned behavior, but actually a little maybe toxic.

[Ally]

Totally.

[Nick Viall]

Yeah.

[Ally]

Yeah, that's. Yeah. I saw something on TikTok this morning that was like, women, stop being the understanding girlfriend. And I was like, whoa. I mean, I think it's good to be understanding, but I feel like there was a deeper point where it's like, okay, but eventually if you continue just being like, always understanding, like, they aren't learning.

[Nick Viall]

Oh, Yeah. I mentioned this at one of our Ask Nick episodes. I had a caller come in. She was talking about her boyfriend, and she was just talking about, well, you know, he's just. You know, he's a. You know, he's younger, so he's like, I think. I don't know. I don't forget the details. But basically it was. I kind of said, like, listen, like, you're just playing into the stereotypes that, like, men mature slower than women. And so, like, anytime he does this, you're just making an excuse for ultimately what maybe just he doesn't care. Like, maybe this is just who he is. And maybe like. Like, we don't need to make excuses for him. And even though we can come up with a reason that makes what they're doing sound a little better, you know, like, ever since I learned about attachment styles, I thought I was very fascinated, very interested. And then fast forward six months, everyone was like, well, my boyfriend's like, you know, he's avoidant. And it's just like. So then all of a sudden, every time he was a dick.

[Ally]

Yeah. We excused him.

[Nick Viall]

It was just like, well, that's because he's interesting.

[Ally]

He's.

[Nick Viall]

Cause he's an avoidant.

[Ally]

Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

You know, and that also goes with Jim.

[Ally]

And I met men, like, women with Gemini men. They're like, well, he's just a Gemini.

[Nick Viall]

You're like, yeah, I guess. But, like, does that make it okay? You know, and then, like, so, like, sometimes understanding things I've had to learn that is. Is you can go a step too far. Like, you can over therapize yourself. Like, you can get too much therapy.

[Ally]

Yep.

[Nick Viall]

You know, I agree, you know, completely. Sometimes you just have to accept.

[Ally]

Yeah. And move forward and move forward, and it's so much easier said than done. Like, I will say for people, like, especially if it's an abusive relationship or a toxic relationship, like, it's hard, but, like, yeah, from where I'm at now, it's like, oh, yeah, like, why would you give him so many chances? Or, like, you know what I mean? It's easier said than done. Just for anyone out there, but, like, leave him.

[Nick Viall]

Is there a message for ladies who might be listening to you and hearing some similarities in your story and relating it? You know, I know it's easy to say, just leave, but maybe what are some questions that you would recommend people listening to ask themselves to maybe have a more honest conversation with themselves about the choices they're making? Right. Because like, you said, like, so you've really acknowledged if it weren't for your friends, if it weren't for your mom, you know, you wouldn't be sitting where you are today, having moved forward, having moved on. And so how can people listening who are relating to your story have more honest conversations with themselves? Because it is so easy to try to make excuses, mask certain behaviors, things like that, and then ultimately opt to stay in a situation for all the reasons you just talked about. The guilt, the. The fears, the, you know, where am I gonna be, et cetera, et cetera.

[Ally]

Gosh, I feel like I'm being so honest. Like, I feel like I still have so much to learn about those types of relationships because. And every situation is different, obviously. And I really wish that I, like, you might have something to say. I wish that I knew because I'm just, like, grateful now. I'm grateful was not before, but, like, I'm grateful for the way it played out because I do think that it made it easier. So, I mean, I guess maybe being honest and, like, opening up with friends or people that are, like, in your circle just to get the feedback of, like, that's, like, not okay, even though you probably know that deep down anyway. So, like, I don't know.

[Natalie]

But sometimes it takes a person on the outside to kind of, like, wake you up and make you realize things like that.

[Ally]

So. Yeah. And then I've also had friends who've just been like, one day it just hit me and. And it was like, okay, I woke up and just finally decided, like, enough is enough. So it's, like, different for everyone, but I think just having grace with yourself and, like, just trusting, like, your friends that are around you and your support system and if you don't have that, that therapy, you know, there's so many great resources out there now, like, so many. So just opening up to someone and, like, feeling loved, I would say.

[Nick Viall]

What's something about yourself that you're currently focused on working on being in kind of this season of, like, healing and self improvement?

[Ally]

I. I feel like I. I moved into my new apartment. I've been. I love decorating too, so I've been like, throwing myself into that and obviously, like, my podcast and. And I'm doing readings, so I've been really busy, so I. I know that I still need to make sure I'm taking time to, like, you know, heal. But I do yoga. I love yoga. I do meditate, so I try to always make sure that I. I love reading, and I've been reading, like, a lot of, like, relationship books and, like, therapy. Type books. So as long as I just take a time out from, like, I don't want to overwork myself. Capricorn. So, like, I just try to have balance, which is hard, but.

[Nick Viall]

Have you been doing any dating?

[Ally]

No. Dating.

[Nick Viall]

No. Dating.

[Ally]

No. No, no. That's scary.

[Nick Viall]

Is that like. So, like, that's like a. Right now you're just that door. That door's closed for you in the most moment or.

[Ally]

Yeah, I think that I. I'm totally. Yeah. Focused on myself and my podcast in my apartment and just, like. Just like, fully enjoy. Like, I feel so free that I don't want anyone to, like, get in the way of that.

[Nick Viall]

Yeah.

[Ally]

Like, I'm. I'm finally feeling like myself and happy, so I'm just gonna ride that out until. Till I'm ready.

[Natalie]

Love that.

[Ally]

Thanks. So I'm not dating right now, and I think I just have a lot, obviously a lot of healing to do. But then also, my therapist, she's amazing. She helped me realize something because after this James, like, breakfast up, I kind of had this wild moment where I was like, wait, I have a. Not a type. I do have a type. I love musicians. But I have a type of, like, I keep dating alcoholics. So my college boyfriend had a drinking problem, which is ultimately why I broke up with them, because I was like, you're drinking a lot and where are we going? What are we doing? So I broke up with him and then now with the James stuff, like, not those addiction issues. And I was, like, talking to my therapist and I'm like, why do I keep dating alcoholics? Like that? What does that say about me? Me? I was like, kind of beating myself up over it. And she was like. Which, by the way, like, you guys don't know this, but my dad died when I was 11 from, like, alcohol related issues. And she was like, you're trying to save your dad. I was like, whoa. Yeah, that was crazy. So therapy has been so helpful, and I really feel like I just need some more, like, healing, I guess.

[Natalie]

Yeah. I think you learn a lot about yourself and about the choices that you make make because of what you've been through or what you've experienced in this life. And. And going to therapy really opens up those doors and makes you understand yourself a little bit better.

[Ally]

Yeah, totally makes sense. Yeah. Crazy. This felt like therapy too, because I really don't. I'm a very, like, push it under the rug unless it's therapy. So, like, I feel actually good that I was able to, like, share this and, like, thank you guys, for making me feel safe and.

[Nick Viall]

Well, thank you for sharing. And I know it's not an easy conversation to have, and I'm glad that you felt comfortable having it. And, like, you know, just from my opinion, I still. I think you did it in the most gracious and kindest way for the other person, regardless of how they think and feel about it. But, yeah, you have a story to share, and you are a public figure. You like you, you know, and people are very curious about your story and your life, and you have your fans who are worried about you and concerned about you.

[Ally]

And so that's another thing. Like, thank you to every. Like, the. Honestly, like, what helped me also get through and not go back. My mom, too. But the fans, like, the amount of messages and dms and just, like, support and people being, like, proud of you, like, you. It just was so helpful. Like, I can't even really explain it, but it really was helpful, and I read a lot of them.

[Nick Viall]

So thank you for opening up and sharing, and I really believe this will have a very positive effect on a lot of people's lives, and hopefully yours as well. And congratulations on your podcast, Star Starstruck. It's out now. There's two episodes out now if you guys are interested in listening. There's a link to Ali's show in the show bio. If you want to click and find it there. Check it out. It's a lot of fun. It's a very interesting topic. Thank you for doing. I mean, it really is. It's really kind of. It's really quite fascinating. And the more you learn about it, like, you. There's clearly something to be gained, you know, from it or just a little bit of insight. Right. It's like one of those things where it doesn't have to be some religion or dogma. It doesn't have to be your entire compass, but, like, it can be a guide.

[Ally]

A guide. Yeah.

[Nick Viall]

Yeah.

[Ally]

I love that. Thank you, guys. Thank you.

[Natalie]

Love you.

[Ally]

Love you. Yay.

[Nick Viall]

Bye.

[Ally]

Yay. Bye.