Episode Summary: The Viall Files E980 - "Ask Nick - I’m In Love With My Boss"
Release Date: August 11, 2025
Hosts: Nick Viall, Natalie Joy, and the Household
Description: In this heartfelt episode of The Viall Files, Nick Viall delves deep into complex relationship dilemmas submitted by listeners. This episode features two compelling stories: Victoria's struggle with ending her first serious relationship and Paige's tumultuous feelings for her long-time ex.
1. Victoria's Dilemma: Ending Her First Serious Relationship ([02:02] - [08:20])
Caller: Victoria, 27 years old
Situation: Victoria is grappling with the decision to break up with her first serious boyfriend of two years. The primary conflict arises from her desire to pursue a 10-month teaching program abroad, which her boyfriend is unsupportive of. This ambition has led her to question the future of their relationship, especially since her boyfriend envisions a "forever relationship," while she is uncertain.
Key Points:
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Healthy Relationship Dynamics: Victoria emphasizes that her relationship has been largely conflict-free, though recent stressors have introduced minor disagreements.
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Career vs. Relationship Goals: Being laid off exacerbated her introspection, leading her to seek opportunities like teaching abroad, which conflicts with her boyfriend's expectations.
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Cultural and Religious Differences: A significant revelation for Victoria is her desire to have a Jewish family—a non-negotiable for her—while her boyfriend is not Jewish. This disparity became more pronounced as she considered long-term commitments.
Notable Quotes:
- "I have just been feeling more recently that I don’t know if this is my forever relationship." ([02:43])
- "I want to raise my kids Jewish first and foremost." ([09:20])
- "He was the only person I had spoken to that hadn’t been excited or supportive of me trying this." ([05:34])
Nick's Advice:
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Be Direct and Kind: Nick emphasizes the importance of honesty without sugarcoating. “If this is how you really feel, then, you know, then, then it’s okay to, like, have your heart change,” ([06:18]).
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Avoid False Hope: He advises against giving mixed signals or hinting at future possibilities that may not materialize.
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Communicate Clearly: Victoria should clearly express her non-negotiable desire for a Jewish family and her inability to settle for less, ensuring her boyfriend understands the gravity of her decision.
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Time the Breakup Appropriately: Given that Victoria is about to embark on her teaching program, Nick suggests she initiate the breakup before she leaves to avoid prolonged emotional turmoil. “You want to do it before you leave, not when you get there,” ([28:05]).
Conclusion for Victoria: Victoria gains clarity on the necessity of prioritizing her personal and cultural goals over maintaining a relationship that may not align with her long-term aspirations. Nick's guidance empowers her to act with integrity and self-respect, ensuring she makes a decision that honors her true self.
2. Paige's Struggle: Revisiting a High School Ex ([33:58] - [87:25])
Caller: Paige, 22 years old
Situation: Paige is conflicted about rekindling a relationship with her high school ex, whom she has been on and off with since sophomore year. Recently, he reached out expressing remorse and a desire to prove his change, leading Paige to question whether she should give him another chance or break free from the cyclical pattern of their interactions.
Key Points:
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Pattern of On-and-Off Relationships: Paige describes a long history of intermittent connections with her ex, characterized by periods of no contact followed by attempts to reconnect.
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Age and Maturity Gap: Her ex is three years younger, leading to conflicts, such as his parents' ultimatums and his inconsistent commitment.
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Emotional Turmoil: Despite recognizing red flags and having a supportive network advising against the relationship, Paige finds herself emotionally entangled and seeking validation.
Notable Quotes:
- "I can't keep doing this through my 20s. I do want to have a boyfriend." ([81:32])
- "I have become a recent fan of the podcast within the last year. My friend showed it to me, and now me and my mom listen to the reality recaps because we're reality TV fanatics." ([86:32])
Nick's Advice:
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Establish Boundaries: Nick recommends that Paige become less available to her ex, allowing him to recognize the inappropriateness of their interactions without direct confrontation. “You just become less and less available. So much so that he will just organically feel it.” ([44:13])
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Block and Move On: To break the cycle, Nick advises Paige to block her ex on all platforms, making it harder for him to reach out and for her to fall back into old patterns. “I would block him on social media. I’d block his phone. I’d delete his number from your phone.” ([73:08])
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Focus on Self-Growth: Emphasizing the importance of personal development, Nick encourages Paige to invest in her dating life, try new experiences, and seek relationships that respect her boundaries.
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Recognize Toxic Patterns: By acknowledging the manipulative behaviors of her ex and understanding that her support system is guiding her towards healthier choices, Paige can empower herself to make decisions that prioritize her well-being.
Conclusion for Paige: Paige gains valuable insights into the unhealthy dynamics of her relationship with her ex. Nick's actionable advice provides her with strategies to assert her boundaries, seek healthier relationships, and prioritize her personal growth over cyclical emotional entanglements.
Final Thoughts
In this episode, Nick Viall offers compassionate and practical advice to listeners navigating complex romantic situations. Whether it’s Victoria needing to align her life goals with her relationship or Paige striving to break free from a toxic cycle, Nick’s guidance emphasizes self-respect, clear communication, and the importance of setting healthy boundaries. "You deserve better," encapsulates the underlying message of this episode, encouraging listeners to prioritize their happiness and well-being in their love lives.
Notable Quote from Nick:
- “You have to be as respectful and as kind as possible. Do not sugarcoat things. It’s better to be direct and kind rather than to, like, insert unnecessary hope.” ([06:32])
This detailed summary encapsulates the essence of Episode E980, providing listeners—both existing fans and newcomers—with a comprehensive overview of the heartfelt discussions and valuable relationship insights shared by Nick Viall.
