← The Working Genius Podcast with Patrick Lencioni
The Working Genius Podcast with Patrick Lencioni
86. Preemptive Vulnerability: Turning Your Quirks into Connection
00:35:02
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- [00:02]
A
When I first met them, I thought, there's no way this is real. And whenever I say that in front of a group of people, they look at the person, they go, that's exactly what we thought about you. They do not seem authentic because most of us can't be that enthusiastic so consistently. Welcome to the Working Genius podcast where we talk about anything and everything about working genius and, and how it impacts your work and your life. I'm Pat Lincione, your host, alongside Cody Thompson, my co host. How you doing, Cody?
- [00:34]
B
Pretty good, Pat.
- [00:36]
A
Very good. What's the topic today, Cody?
- [00:39]
B
It is called preemptive vulnerability.
- [00:42]
A
Yeah, that's kind of a mouthful. Preemptive vulnerability. Who came up with that? Oh, yeah, I think it was me. But I think this is so powerful. So powerful. And that is all of us have things we do that come out of our geniuses that make us in certain circumstances, problematic or even annoying. And there's a hack in life and that is this. If you can preemptively tell people what you do, sometimes that annoys people, you look like a champ. You take away the annoyance because they're like, if you understand yourself well enough to admit it and to tell me that when I see you do it, it's not going to be uncomfortable, I'm going to feel like, oh, yeah, you told me that you know who you are. In fact, that kind of vulnerability or humility, they're rooted in the same things, is one of the most attractive qualities in the world. You know, I'm a follower of Jesus and they, and I remember somebody said to me years ago, he was the. He embodied humility in every way and that's why people wanted to be around him. And if you think about people, you know, who are really humble, truly humble, you'll love being around them because they have no guile. They admit things about themselves without you having to pretend otherwise. And one of the hardest things in life is when you know somebody and they have a flaw, but they aren't willing to acknowledge it, so you have to pretend or dance around it. It is probably the most truly annoying thing is when you're not allowed to call out another person's flaw because you don't think they can handle it. Does that make sense, Cody?
- [02:15]
B
Yeah, absolutely, it makes sense. And I love the context of this. The container of this episode is not just like teams because you could do this in your everyday life. It's actually a gift to your friends, family, community, neighbors, to say, to be preemptively truth telling, like it is Sort of interesting to think. A lot of what we do is try to get people to say vulnerability is just say the truth, even when you're afraid or you're not right, or, or, or the truth about, hey, here's a part of my personality that sometimes comes out in ways that as disruptive or whatever else. And so I love the, you know, you know, we talk about this in the context of teams all the time. It will fast track your ability to build a healthy, cohesive team, but it works in your marriage and like with your kids, with your family. So kind of fun.
- [03:02]
A
And you know what's interesting? It's like there's that moment when you think, oh, should I admit this or should I acknowledge this? And that discomfort lasts for about five seconds. And then when you do it, and every time there's relief. Yeah, there's relief in you and in the other person. And you're like, that wasn't that hard. And then the very next time you have to do it, there's that hesitance. And so what we're saying is commit to vulnerability and humility. Preemptively announce to other people, hey, here's some of the things I do that are hard. And your working genius gives you such insights into what those things are. And what we're going to do right now is we're going to go through every combination. So the 15 different working geniuses, if you will, and we're going to. So everybody listening to this, we're going to be talking about you, but think about the other people, you know, and when we can be vulnerable about this is what I'm going to do. That you might sometimes find annoying. It makes it so much easier for other people to do the same. So be the first one to do it. Be the first kid on your block to tell people.
- [04:00]
B
And a lot of this, Pat, is we did a podcast a while ago, probably over a year ago, called Rough Edges. And so it was like the combinations, because we all love working in our genius and showing up in our genius all the time, sometimes we jump into situations right away and those rough edges can show. And so one of the hacks is really just to say, like, hey, because I like this stuff, because I'm wired this way, I might come across like this. So if you see me doing that, let me know, you know, or if it's the wrong time or so I love the preemptive humility combined with the rough edges. We're going to go through all the types. Going to be a blast.
- [04:36]
A
Yeah. And the Last thing I want to say is, this is not about your working frustrations, because, like, my working frustrations are E and T. So are yours, Cody. It's not about going to people and saying, hey, just know this. If I have to do ET Work, I will try my very best. I'm not going to be great at it. That's different. This is about the annoying things that we can do that come from our geniuses. So they're not something we should apologize for. But there are times when our geniuses are not appropriate or when they get exaggerated. And so we can say, hey, I know it. You're allowed to call it out. Let's go forward in freedom. All right, so let's start from the beginning, as they say in the Sound of Music. So I'm going to do WI here, and I've got. Reading this from my sheet because my wife and a few of my very best friends in the world are wis. And here's the thing about you as a wi, go to the people you work with and say, just so you guys know, I'm not always realistic or practical in my thinking. And that creates stress and chaos sometimes because I'm going to be inventing sometimes when we're way downstream. I was with an executive team yesterday, and there was a guy on the team that was a wi, the only one out of 15 people, big team. And I said, so you probably do this a lot. You probably say, hey, but maybe we should think about this. And they laughed. And he goes, yeah, I do that. And I'm like, it's okay to go, hey, dude, not the right time, but we love you. We love that you're a wi. Just right now, that's not the right thing.
- [06:04]
B
Well, and. And you. You actually did, in that room, the very thing we're doing right now is you went around and just said, hey, here's how these people show up, you know, and then they were all sort of amazed, like, oh, yeah, that is how I come across when in that situation. And so the. The guy who's the WI was like, you said something to the effect of, like, I bet you're willing to go to any brainstorming meeting because it's fun to you. But the idea of leaving there with some action items is probably. You're probably not the best person to. To do that, you know? And the whole room laughs because they know that's true. But it gives them a way to talk about it where it's not, like, a conviction of who they are, like a, you know, Like a condemning part of their character.
- [06:48]
A
Yes. And that's where we need to get to that place where we can say, this comes. You don't get your genius without this part, too.
- [06:55]
B
Yeah.
- [06:55]
A
And so brag about it. Say, hey, you guys, I will be the source of some pretty impractical ideas sometimes, maybe even at the wrong time. Just so you know, they'll be so glad that you call that out. Okay, Cody, let's. Let's do wd.
- [07:09]
B
Wd. So we talked about the rough edge. And the thing that they should, you know, throw out there all the time is that they have a proclivity to nuance. So they like nuance. So it makes it hard for them to be certain about things, and they question themselves even at times.
- [07:25]
A
You know what we should do? We have a WD present here. Hey, Matt, come here and tell us. Admit to us. Like, tell us how you describe yourself in regard to this. To this limitation for a wd.
- [07:39]
C
Yeah, I kind of talked about this two weeks ago on our first video episode. But as a wd, I definitely have to get in front of my rough edges if I want my feedback to be taken the way I intend it to. So, I mean, you guys have experienced me doing this probably hundreds of times throughout the last couple years. But if we get into a meeting and I start asking questions.
- [08:06]
A
That, you.
- [08:06]
C
Know, it feels like it slows down the meeting, or they feel like they're kind of at a different altitude than we're kind of working at at that time. I really have to get in front of it and say, hey, remember, I'm a wd. I'm going to ask questions just because this is my W. Like, I need to get past these questions before I can kind of think about the big picture. And so getting in front of it, you know, like you said, it just allows everybody else to understand where I'm coming from and. And give me the benefit of the doubt.
- [08:33]
A
And if we're in a meeting with you, Matt, and you're being too nuanced, how do you feel when we go, hey, Matt, I think you're over nuancing this.
- [08:40]
C
It's fine for me now because I've probably called it out myself anyway. I've said, hey, this is a W question. So when I say that, then everyone's aware of the fact that, oh, he's not just, you know, getting stuck in the weeds or trying to, you know, find us at a different altitude. He's just using his genius, and he knows it.
- [08:58]
B
And Pat, so much of the team Conversations we have both internal and with teams that we're working with is like, we're pushing for clarity over certainty. And so, you know, the certainty part of a WD being like, I don't know if that's the right answer, you know, so. So we can, like you and I, we can get 85% of the way there and be like, I think we're good. And Matt's like, I don't know, we got to figure out the. The rest of this, you know, like, like. And they ping pong back and forth between wonder and discernment. And it's. It is kind of fun to watch.
- [09:28]
A
And the key here is we love your wd, but there are moments when we need to set it aside. Every single person in the world has that. And so we have to. If we can get comfortable with that, other people will be too. Thank you, Matt, for your help on that one. Okay, let's talk about wg. This says a person who's a WG needs to say, I can sometimes be impulsive. And then I'll jump back and forth between pushing people and then being cautious. And this is really interesting because, like, W might be the most non disruptive, you know, react, responsive. They're like, oh, I wonder. And they're cautious and thoughtful. And then G is probably the most disruptive because they're like, come on, let's do it. So this is a person that can go back and forth between maybe not versus yes, let's go. And. And yesterday I had an executive in the room and I called that out and they said, oh, my gosh, you. You do that all the time. And they were like, yep, sometimes I get caught in between and it feels like I'm going back and forth. So just let people know, like, I'm going to seem simultaneously impulsive and then cautious in the next breath.
- [10:42]
B
Yeah. It's funny, you and I have a shared friend who's a wg who I. I often will describe it in a phrase like the. I wonder if I should and then buy this car is the. So it's. The W is I wonder if I should and then buy this car is this galvanizing, like, impulsive thing. And it's awesome. And yeah, they can come across as impulsive, but when you know this about them, it's actually, it's fun and beautiful and he did buy that car, you know, so.
- [11:11]
A
Right, right, right. And it's great for them to go, hey. And one of the biggest things about doing this is sometimes what you need to do to Avoid these things is to take one of the letters away and say, hey, this is a good time for Gene, not W. Yeah, this is a time for W' ing and not Gene. And people can hear that and go, oh, okay, I'll lean into one of the geniuses and set the other aside for a second. How about we. This is. Man, I have a lot of, I love my, my friends that are we's and my colleagues, but what are the, what are the challenges with them? Cody?
- [11:42]
B
Yeah, rough edge sort of language that we put in here is around like they're overly deferential. There's like a enablement factor that they want to help everybody and a wonder factor that they might hesitate to initiate change or even push back. So they prefer to let others make the first move. They can kind of appear angsty. And so it is sort of interesting. You, you've met more we, you know, recently than we've had in the past, but that if you just say like, hey, I want to help. Sometimes I don't know how to help. It can make me come across as like deferential. But my intentions are good. That's a great way of putting that out there, being preemptively vulnerable. And yeah, that, that's. I think people who are we's who hear that are like, that is me. I should tell people that and it would just change the whole dynamic.
- [12:30]
A
Yeah, and here's a very. We's are rarely selfish. I mean, selfishness is separate than your working genius. But they, they definitely don't stand up for themselves the same way. And they, they'd be better off telling people, hey, listen, I'm probably going to be letting people roll over me and so I want you to know that. So whether we're in a meeting together or I'm having a one on one conversation, you're allowed to go, hey, don't do that. I don't. I'm not looking for a doormat here. I want you to be. And that might be the very thing that gets them out of it. But if they don't say it to you, it's going to be really tough to say to them. I think you're being a doormat.
- [13:05]
B
Yep.
- [13:06]
A
WT's now. Wow. The WTS. I love them. I had a guy yesterday that I was talking to on a team who's a WT. They are the furthest apart. So they're up at 50,000ft with the W with the wonder and down at 5ft. I'm landing the plane on tenacity and we always say, try to separate those two things because it's hard. So they have this internal tension and stress. They ping pong back and forth between these altitudes. We call it altitude sickness. They're at 50,000ft and 5ft. And so sometimes they have this desire to get things done and then they slow down and go, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, what should I be doing? And they need to say, hey, I'm probably going to be vacillating between the first step in the process and the last step and you're going to be confused and I'm going to be stressed. And you might have to like tie my hands behind my back and say, let's set the W aside right now while we're getting this done. Or let's set the tea aside right now while we're doing some wondering. Help them not do it simultaneously.
- [14:06]
B
Yeah. And this type is really unique in the sense that tension is really hard to manage. Sometimes it's like the, the question wonder, what are the possibilities? And the desire to go get stuff over the finish line and ping ponging back and forth does that. That's a difficult tension. And the guy in the room yesterday, when you, when you said, hey, I bet you're big picture oriented and then 5ft on the ground and, and the guy sitting next to him is like, that's exactly how I describe him, you know, so it was just fun to see them have these aha moments around that tension.
- [14:37]
A
And then right after that, he actually displayed the wt.
- [14:40]
B
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- [14:41]
A
You know, he's like super practical and super theoretical and I saw how it freezes him up. You know, one thing I want to say, Cody, is for those people that are consultants listening to this or a manager who takes their team through it when you don't have a lot of time to go through working genius. Actually, the rough edges that we're talking about here, these, these things that they do that sometimes can be hard. This is the fastest way to get people to go. That's me. I find that people, they know the things they do on the extremes. And so sometimes when you describe their genius, that's really powerful. But sometimes when you get to these things, they're like, oh yeah. People tell me this all the time can be powerful.
- [15:21]
B
And then in the room of 15 people there were, you know, at the beginning, everybody's always suspicious of a new assessment, you know, and they're like, what is this going to say about me? And say that I'm good at or bad at by the third person, where you're describing the rough edge. They were like, they're all laughing. They're like, oh, yeah, this obviously works. How did you, without knowing our team, go around and describe how we experience them every day?
- [15:43]
A
You know, in fact, you know, this is interesting. The CEO came up to me. Cause he had heard of working genius before, but he said, the way you presented it today, we didn't have a lot of time, was super practical. And we really got to it. And what it was is we went through and we said. We just went around the room and said, this is yours. This is what you're good at, but this is probably what you struggle with. And we hit that. And that is. That brought out the vulnerability from people. And they were like, this we can work with. So we thought that was really helpful. I'm going to do the next one, Cody, because it's me.
- [16:11]
B
Yeah.
- [16:13]
A
Because I can own this pretty strong. And that is. I'm an id, invention and discernment. Which means I am really impatient when people aren't caught up to my thinking because I'm always jumping three steps ahead, which is totally annoying. And so then I can be overly confident when people push back. I'm like, come on, come on, just get up to speed. And they're like, are you going to fill us in about the three steps that you haven't talked about? And I'm like, oh, my gosh, I didn't even think about that. As a result of that, the people with galvanizing enablement and tenacity feel like I don't appreciate everything that's required to get something done. I just. But this will work. And they're like, you want to slow down and take us through how you got there and what's going to take to implement.
- [16:57]
B
Right.
- [16:58]
A
And when I say to the people on my team, I'm going to underestimate G E N T because I'm jumping to the end. They're. They're like, so when you do that, can we call you on it? I'm like, you have to call me on it. It's a. It's a big change.
- [17:12]
B
And the pushback part, I mean, it's. Because when you think about it as you walk through what invention and discernment as a combination is, is like somebody who doesn't have both of those. You throw out invention and then other people discern. But when it happens internal, it's like you've already gone through the loop for yourself a handful of times and nobody observed the, oh, here's an idea. I Thought of. And then I refined it. And then I thought. And then I innovated around it more, and then I refined it even more. I'm presenting what feels like a pretty already vetted idea. And so because nobody observes that they can. It can come across like, well, no, of course the plan is perfect. You know, why are you. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- [17:54]
A
So that's good. Maybe I should. That's really interesting. I'd forgotten about that. Sometimes I'm frustrated that people don't understand that I've already gone through the process of vetting and how in the world would they know? So that could be really annoying. All righty.
- [18:09]
B
Ig. So the, the inventor galvanizers can come across as like, disingenuous. We, we, you know, almost. We had another one in the room yesterday and we're like, hey, the first time you meet these people, they seem so excited about every possibility and you think this can't be sustainable. And then a year later, they're still that. They're still that, you know, that that's. It doesn't feel sustainable, but somehow it really is for them.
- [18:33]
A
And this is so important because. And this has been universal. I mean, I know I can tell you like eight IGs, and they're all that. When I first met them, I thought, there's no way this is real. And whenever I say that in front of a group of people, they look at the person, they go, that's exactly what we thought about you. They do not seem authentic because most of us can't be that enthusiastic. So consistently, if you can say to people when you meet them, hey, I'm an ig, I get really excited about things. It's always genuine. But it's not going to seem genuine because it's almost unbelievable. But just trust that I actually mean it when I say it. What a great shorthand. What a great hack. Because they're thinking it anyway. And if you anticipate their objection, if you will, and say, if you think I seem insincere, it's. You're going to find out eventually that I am. And other people around you are going to, yeah, yeah, yeah, he's authentic. But it's almost impossible to see that at first.
- [19:25]
B
Yeah. That over the top excitement, you know, and, and because, you know, and your, your other letters play into this. But oftentimes going straight from invention to galvanizing people around the invention with no discernment anybody that, that goes like, wait a second. Should we think about that for a second? You know, so I'm a dg. And my brother's an ig. And often our relationship, he's like, you know, we should do. We should. And then fill in the blank. And I'm like, well, let me do the discernment part in the middle of that real quick, and then we can both start galvanizing it, you know, so. But they do. They have this unbridled excitement about all the possibilities. It's pretty.
- [20:04]
A
And what a great thing is when they can go, so could somebody please fill in the D for me so that I don't jump from I to G without discernment. That's a person saying that to the people they work with or live with changes them from somebody who you feel bad for giving them some discernment to know that you're actually serving them because they invited you to do it. Okay, IE man, I love. I love all the different types. I really do. But ies are really inventive, but they can be too accommodating because you can say, I don't like that idea. And they're too quick to go, okay, I'll give you another one. And unlike the ig, who's going to be galvanizing you, the IE is going to be, okay, so what else do you want? What do you want? And they might give up on an idea too quickly. And so what we say is, you know, allow things to be vetted and discussed and appreciate the. The tension and the conflict and advocate for your idea a little bit more before moving on and just trying to please the person you're inventing for. So it's an IE can be a little too quick to go, okay, maybe that's a bad idea. And it might be a great idea.
- [21:11]
B
Yeah, it's like, I think we call them the adaptable designer. And it's just like, don't be too adaptable. You know, lean into the designer part of that phrase, too, you know, but.
- [21:21]
A
As we say, don't throw the baby out with the bathwater. You're an ie. We love that. But no, there's going to be times where people are going to go, why didn't you push us harder on that? And you're going to be, oh, I guess because as soon as I don't think people like an idea, I just move on to the next thing.
- [21:34]
B
It. So we put. They have like a sort of a dogged pursuit of solutions that work that they. And they might actually miss the nuance in the human needs or implications in there. So they're like, they love. Inventors, love coming up with Solutions. And then they love. If you have tenacity as a, as a second or in addition to that genius, you're like, let's just go execute the solution. You know, and so there's, you're. You're taking maybe the E out of it or the needs of others. And some of this can do, you know, some of it can also have a Myers Briggs, like, are you a thinker, feeler type? You know, three dimensional aspect to it? But I think that if you're an IT and you say, hey, I come up with solutions and I think they're good, and I go right to execution. Sometimes you guys can help me by slowing me down or help me think about the impact it has on others. What a gift to the people around you.
- [22:25]
A
Yeah. And so often what it's will say is people will say, I don't know if this idea will work. And they'll say, if you do it the way I laid it out. Exactly. It will work.
- [22:34]
B
Yeah.
- [22:34]
A
And then. And it's like, yeah, but human beings rarely stick to exactly the right protocol, and that's a great thing for them to say. I might be kind of blind to, like you said, the human nuances here.
- [22:43]
B
Yeah. Okay. I can do the dg. I have some experience with this. It says here on the sheet can be cavalier in declarations of what is true or good and can be dismissive. And I think that's a personal attack. Whoever wrote this, I think they just were like, this is my relationship to Cody. No, I've actually used that word with you recently. I was like, pat, I'm sorry. I was pretty cavalier last night. You know, like, I was pretty declarative and definitive and didn't leave a lot of room for nuance. And yeah, that's a, that's a great way of describing it. And there was a DG in the room the other day and, or yesterday. And he was like, yeah, here's what's really clear, you know, and. And so I see that in myself. And when I tell others, I'm like, hey, I'm pretty. I'm pretty quick to get to what I think is the right solution or the right answer. And then I start motivating people around that. If you see me doing that, you feel free to call me on it. And it tends to go a lot better when that happens.
- [23:43]
A
Gosh. One of the most powerful things about working genius is just having the vocabulary to call people on things that they've already agreed to and already understand the vocabulary. It's. It would be so hard to say to somebody, gosh, you know, I think you're overconfident at times and you, you're too quick. But it's to say, hey, you know, you're a DG. And DGs do this. They're like, yep, that's so much easier to go. It's not just me. I'm not ashamed of this. It's part of my genius. And I can accept. Now if, Cody, if you didn't celebrate and accept the good parts of dg, all those, it'd be much harder to accept the drawback.
- [24:17]
B
Absolutely. But it is interesting. Like, I had one of our master facilitators who does the working genius certification, Krista. She has wonder. And we were in an off site and I was doing the rough edge of the DG thing and. And I was just like, jump into solutions and motivating people around the solutions. And in her very beautiful way, she goes, you know, you know that curiosity is vulnerability, you know, and she's like, and, and. Which is like a very w. Like if asking questions and not always having the solution and the answer. And that was such good feedback for me to be like, okay, we can get to dg, but let's start with curiosity and wonder and start there and then tag you in when we've, you know, when we're ready for the DG part.
- [25:04]
A
And two hours later, you might need to turn to her because Matt is a WD2 and go, hey, you know something? I think the time for nuance. I think we're ready now to make a call. And I know there's still a few questions, But I think 8020 has arrived. And let's. Let's go. And she could go, oh, you're right. I'm probably over nuancing this.
- [25:20]
B
Yeah, absolutely.
- [25:22]
A
It's great. Okay. De. I know who I know a lot of des. Some of my favorite people to work with. We call them the warm blanket. You know, they're these consummate, discerning players. They give you great. They're helpers, but they're thoughtful helpers. What is the official term for a de? I don't have it here in front of me.
- [25:38]
B
Insightful collaborator, I think.
- [25:40]
A
Insightful collaborator, exactly. They can be overly deferential and want to please people. Sometimes the E can overwhelm the D. And though they see the problem, they might be like, well, I just want to please you right now, so I'm not going to dive in there and push back hard enough. And so they can oftentimes be a Little too quick to please. Now, here's the thing. That's what makes them amazing. They have this great combination. But there are gonna be times when there's stuff going on in an organization, on a team, or in a situation, and you need somebody to stand up and say, no, this isn't right, or, this isn't good. And they might whiff on that moment. They might not stand up hard enough and say, my discernment tells me this is a bad idea. And what you need to say is, I'm not good at ruffling other people's feathers. And so you can call me out on that. And when I do it, just know I'm going to be feeling really guilty.
- [26:33]
B
Yeah, I like the way you describe that, because it's like my discernment thinks this might be the wrong idea, and my enablement might not. Let me tell you the whole truth, you know, like. Like. Or. Or present it as emphatically as I believe it, you know, because I care about you and I care about others. So that is a really interesting combination. I love that.
- [26:53]
A
And you know what the irony is? They can leave people feeling let down because they didn't tell them, and then that crushes them as an E because they're like, I would do anything for you. I just don't like the part where I have to actually push back on you. So their E makes them want to be helpful and supportive. And then at the end, if it doesn't work out, people, why didn't you tell me? So it's a real dilemma. It's a real challenge.
- [27:20]
B
I'll do the DT Judgmental is a. Is they can come across that way, and partly in the sense of they have discernment, and they're also great at getting things across the finish line. And so when others ask questions like, how are we going to do that? And it feels so obvious internally to them, they can be like, oh.
- [27:40]
A
Or.
- [27:40]
B
And they're so competent at actually getting things done that oftentimes when they're on teams or in environments where other people have a harder time with that, they can. They can be like, wait, what's wrong? I know how to get this done, and I do it all the way to the. To the end. What's wrong with you?
- [27:56]
A
You know, you know, what's. What's great about this? All of these things came from people who have these temperaments, these combinations. And I think it's important to understand that this. These. We learned this by working with people, and they go, oh, yeah, I do that. And every time I have a dt, and there were three of them in the room yesterday with these executives we were working with. And I said, you can be judgmental sometimes with people. Don't. And, and every one of them go said, I totally do. And the other people in the room said, oh my gosh, you do that, don't you? So it's. This is not one of those things where like we're coming up with this and convicting people. It's people telling us, I know I do this sometimes on the tougher side. And what a great thing to tell people. I know I do this well.
- [28:34]
B
And. And the way it comes can come across like in a meeting. We're at a four hour off site meeting, the dt, the way they show up is like, okay, I already kind of know what to do. Can you end this meeting so I can get out of here and do the work? You know, like there's an impatience there, you know?
- [28:50]
A
Exactly. All right, ge, this is the enthusiastic encourager, the coach cheerleader. And they also can seem insincere and over the top sometimes because they're trying to be so optimistic and they see the good and they're like, yes, we can do it, you can do it, and I'll be with you. And sometimes that after a while, what can happen with a GE is some of the power of what they do might be limited because people are used to them doing that. And it seems like, are you doing it out of reflex or are you doing it because you've really thought of this? So sometimes they might need to go, hey, you might need to slow me down. I'm the kind of guy that might just encourage you off a cliff. Not often, but I'm so prone to go, yes, yes, you can do this. That I might not say, I think that's a bad idea. And that's the person that could say, I could use a little bit of discernment help here so that I'm not pushing people towards something that's not really good for them.
- [29:51]
B
Yeah, it's funny, the people that you've experienced. My mother in law is actually a GE and I could say I'm going to go spearfish and sleep on the beach for a month. And she'd be like, you should do it. You know, like there's no, there's. She. They want so much with the enablement side to encourage you and do what you know. And then they have the galvanizing piece that says, like, I mean, I'm not just going to encourage you. I'M gonna, I'm gonna push and, and inspire you to go take those steps. So I love the, the little bit of caution. Like if you're doing the preemptive vulnerability thing is like, hey, you might say something and I'll move right to. That's a great idea. You know.
- [30:29]
A
Right. And we're not saying that every GE doesn't have common sense.
- [30:33]
B
Yeah.
- [30:34]
A
But there's gonna be those moments where they're, for whatever reason, where they revert to their natural thing and they might be quick to go, yeah, you should do that. And that's when you need to go. Just so you know, if I'm telling you to do something and I'm encouraging you and nobody else is, you might want to check on it, you know, so that's a great thing to be able to say.
- [30:56]
B
I'll do gt and then you can wrap it up with ET after this. But GT can come. So you have galvanizing, which is a disruptive act, and then tenacity. I can get things over the finish line. They can be impatient and pushy and a little domineering. So, you know, if you, if you're a GT and you're like, hey, I come across this way sometimes because I'm, I can figure out a way to kick down doors and get stuff done and I don't have a lot of patience. But you use the word butt kicker for a GT in the, in the off site yesterday, and that's totally true. And what a, what a gift to others around to be like, I mean, we can use the heck out of that. But also know when it shows up in a, in a rough edge type way, the way it will impact the people around you.
- [31:41]
A
Yeah. We call them again the assertive driver. And we need that. So don't throw the baby out with the bathwater. Just let people know. It's like, I might kick you in the butt when you don't deserve it. That's my. I have kind of a reflex knee to foot to butt. And, and just know that that's kind of my reflex. And yeah, 80% of the time it works out great. Maybe of the time, but there's going to be that 10% where you can call me on it and I'll be the first to go, oh, I did that. I reflex that, didn't I? It's very powerful. Et's man, the ET is the, the loyal finisher. And we all, every organization can use them. They're so, they're wonderful. And you can be any job with an ET as long as you surround yourself by people that are different, but they can be too quick to say yes and to over commit and, and then they get burned out. Because when they commit to something, the E. And they go, yes, I'll help. Unlike some people that go, oh, I volunteered, but I can't do it now. I'll just call them and tell them I can't. They feel like, no, I have to finish the ET it can get, can really overburden themselves and it's almost hard for them to, for them to prevent it. So if you're an ET and go to people and say, I'm going to volunteer too much and I'm going to take on too much. And I want you to know that because at the end of the day, when I burn out or if I can't get it done, it's going to crush me, it's going to crush you. And so when, when an ET volunteers go, are you sure you can do this?
- [33:02]
B
Yeah.
- [33:03]
A
You sure this is the right thing to say yes to?
- [33:06]
B
Yeah, I don't that commentary is perfect. I mean, I think it's the people oriented part with the enablement side and then the ability to finish tasks. So anytime somebody says anything, they're like, yeah, I can do that. I want to help you and I know how to get it done. And so they're, they're, they almost lack that. Like you said, they can overburden themselves, they can over commit. And what a great way to tell your friends, your family and your coworkers like, hey, can you help me with this? Because I can't seem to help myself say no.
- [33:37]
A
You know what's a great thing about this? I think one of the worst things in life is shame. The kind of shame you shouldn't feel. And so, so many people are like, they love their genius, but they actually have some shame around the rough edges. And so I want everybody listening to this and if you work with clients to do this too. Say, accept, really accept and celebrate what you're great at, but be just as accepting and celebrating on the things that you do to the extreme. It will make life easier for you and for all the people around you. And this can bring about the power of working genius like nothing else. So that's what we want to say today is go out there and be preemptively vulnerable about these things, but go ahead and be preemptively vulnerable about your strengths too. In other words, allow yourself to say, yeah, I am good at these things. They go hand in hand.
- [34:30]
B
I love it.
- [34:31]
A
All right. I think that's it for today. Thanks for joining us, everybody. We love talking about working genius. All the people out there that have been certified and that have gone through this and are using it with their teams and with their families and them just in themselves. We love hearing from you. We get a lot of great ideas from you, and we look forward to chatting with you. More about working genius in our next episode. And until then, God bless.