The Working Genius Podcast with Patrick Lencioni
Episode 106: No Shame in That
Date: February 10, 2026
Host: Patrick Lencioni
Co-host: Cody Thompson
Episode Overview
In “No Shame in That,” Patrick Lencioni and Cody Thompson delve into the liberating power of understanding one’s Working Genius—as well as Working Frustrations—and the pervasive shame people feel when work doesn’t align with their natural talents. This episode explores why individuals often carry unnecessary guilt about not excelling in certain types of work, how this impacts careers and relationships, and how embracing our unique wiring can bring relief, freedom, and more effective teamwork both at the office and at home.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Understanding Working Genius and Shame
- Purpose of Working Genius: At its core, the Working Genius model aims to relieve people of unnecessary guilt, judgment, and shame associated with their natural work abilities and struggles.
- “From the very beginning, Cody, we talked about the purpose of Working Genius was really to help people experience less guilt and judgment, and shame is part of that.” (A/Pat, 00:49)
- Common Experience: Most people, at some point, have felt shame simply for not being good at things outside their natural “genius.”
- “Everyone was probably... made to feel shame that had nothing to do with anything but what their working genius was, whatever their working frustrations were.” (A/Pat, 00:00)
2. Liberation from Lifelong Shame
- Transformative Realizations: Many adults carry shame from their working frustrations since childhood or early career, believing something is “wrong” with them. Realizing one’s wiring creates profound relief.
- “One of the most, like, fun things that we do with working genius is... we get to liberate them from that, where they're like, wait a second. This is because I'm wired this way.” (B/Cody, 02:01)
- Personal Example: Pat shares how his guilt over disliking Saturday chores with his dad was not a moral failing but a mismatch with his working genius.
- “I felt so guilty... but it was because it was all E.T. There was no—I exercised none of my geniuses or competencies.” (A/Pat, 02:49)
3. Striving Against the Grain & Burnout
- Shame Leads to Over-Striving: Shame often results in years of struggling to “fix” ourselves or to be someone we’re not.
- “That shame actually translates into this striving... you spend a lot of your life trying to undo what's wrong with you.” (B/Cody, 03:41-06:25)
- Burnout as a Result of Misalignment: Burnout is not just about working too hard but about working outside one’s genius, compounded by the shame of not meeting expectations.
- “Burnout isn't about working too hard, it's about doing the wrong kind of work... and then feeling completely inappropriate shame about that.” (A/Pat, 07:23)
4. Embracing Differences in Teams and Families
- Variety as Strength: What some see as weaknesses are necessary trade-offs for strengths:
- “You mean you're saying that this supposed weakness of mine is actually rooted in my strength and I couldn't have that strength without that weakness?” (A/Pat, 05:24)
- Practical Application at Home: Pat explains how his wife Laura understands their differences and adjusts household responsibilities to match their strengths, reducing guilt and friction.
- “Frankly, I love going out there and figuring all this out. So why don’t you just stay in and do what the stuff you’re working on.” (A/Pat, 04:31)
5. Societal & Parental Expectations
- Systems Reward Certain ‘Geniuses’: Schools and workplaces often favor specific working geniuses, causing many to feel “less than.”
- “Our systems are designed a different way... the quick witted people get sent to the principal's office and then the loyal finishers get straight A's.” (B/Cody, 14:23)
- Parental Reactions: Well-intentioned parents may push children to improve on frustrations, misunderstanding their innate wiring.
- “I remember my dad... he'd walk in the house and open the garage door and go, look at your garage. It's a mess... if he knew that I was wired that way, he might have said, oh, yeah, look at this is proof of that thing you're going to invent in 20 years called working genius.” (A/Pat, 11:53)
6. Path to Acceptance and Celebration
- Reframing Weakness: Instead of seeing working frustrations as flaws or sources of guilt, people should accept and even celebrate them.
- “Cover up your geniuses and your competencies on your report... just look at your frustrations and then say, where have I experienced burnout, guilt, shame, Something's wrong with me around this. And then just try to release those.” (B/Cody, 09:37)
- Role Recognition: Fully embracing both your genius and your frustration improves teamwork and self-esteem.
- “You should embrace them both... You're quick witted and courageous, then it's like, but you're not these other things. He's like, I'll take that.” (A/Pat, 13:57; B/Cody, 14:10)
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
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On working outside your genius:
“Your gifts from God came with your frustrations, and you can feel good about yourself, even if sometimes you have to do the things you don't love. Now, you don't have to think that it's because there's something wrong with you.” (A/Pat, 16:26) -
On the futility of striving against your wiring:
“We're better at believing the lie that something's wrong with us than we are the truth that we're a four wheel drive, you know, vehicle. And so we spend all of our lives going, well, I wish I could go 0 to 60 instead of embracing the reality and the beauty of the fact that we get to drive uphills.” (B/Cody, 06:25) -
On the joy of liberation:
“When they get to go, oh, my gosh, I don't have to feel any guilt or shame or carry that anymore, that I'm not good at those other things, that's... maybe one of my favorite aha moments.” (B/Cody, 02:01) -
Workplace example:
“When I worked at the bank as a teller... I thought, I'm lazy. I don't care enough, I don't pay enough attention. And now it's like, oh, no, dude, your summer job is not what you want, but you are keeping these people entertained and you're having fun.” (A/Pat, 07:43) -
Parental dynamics:
“Parents need to understand this because... they look at the things you struggle with and they say, why aren't you better at that?” (A/Pat, 10:45)
Timestamps for Key Segments
- 00:00 – 01:07: Introduction, theme of shame in working genius/frustration
- 02:01 – 02:49: The joy of liberating people from shame about working frustrations
- 02:49 – 03:41: Pat’s personal story about childhood shame and mowing the lawn
- 04:31 – 05:24: Family application—recognizing and respecting each other’s wiring
- 06:25 – 07:23: How shame leads to striving and burnout
- 07:43 – 08:43: Bank teller story—misaligned work and misplaced guilt
- 10:25 – 11:53: Exercise: reflect on where shame often matches frustration
- 13:26 – 14:23: Embracing both strengths and limitations
- 14:23 – 15:15: How systems often reward certain geniuses and challenge others
- 15:15 – 16:13: Case study: seeing a young adult flourish in their working genius
- 16:26 – End: The central message—acceptance brings relief
Flow, Tone, & Takeaways
The conversation is candid and supportive, peppered with personal anecdotes and encouraging reframing of lifelong struggles. Both Patrick and Cody stress that self-acceptance—embracing both strengths and frustrations without shame—enables greater joy and effectiveness in work, relationships, and life in general.
Main takeaway:
Rather than feel shame or guilt over your areas of frustration, recognize them as the necessary complements to your unique genius. It’s not about fixing yourself to match others, but about “driving uphills”—living, working, and contributing in the way you’re meant to.
This episode provides reassurance and practical permission for listeners to drop the shame and lean fully into both their gifts and their limits—for themselves, their families, and their teams.
