Therapy and Theology: S7 E3 | How Can I Trust God When I Don’t Understand What He Allows?

Host: Lysa TerKeurst
Co-Hosts: Jim Cress (Licensed Professional Counselor), Dr. Joel Muddamalle (Director of Theological Research at Proverbs 31 Ministries)
Release Date: October 3, 2024

1. Introduction to Broken Trust

The episode delves into the profound challenge of maintaining trust in God amidst personal hurt and perceived injustices. Lysa TerKeurst shares her personal struggle with broken trust following the end of her marriage, highlighting the emotional turmoil and the difficulty in reconciling God's role in her suffering.

Lysa TerKeurst [01:29]: "When talking about broken Trust, I think one of the hardest things to process is what do I do when it feels like the person who hurt me just got away with it? And even more so, how do I continue to trust God when it feels like he allowed the person who hurt me to get away with it?"

2. Lysa’s Personal Journey of Heartbreak

Lysa recounts a poignant moment on the beach where she felt overwhelmed by unfairness and hopelessness after her spouse left. She describes the intense emotions of bitterness and the struggle to forgive both the person who hurt her and the perceived inaction of God.

Lysa TerKeurst [03:45]: "I just thought, this is never going to get better. It's always going to hurt this much. And it feels so unfair. And I don't understand God. I just don't understand."

3. Joel’s Theological Perspective on Being Sinned Against

Dr. Joel Muddamalle emphasizes the significance of understanding that when we are wronged, it's not solely a personal issue but also a matter of sin against God, given that humanity is created in His image.

Joel Muddamalle [08:12]: "They're created in the likeness and image of God. [...] And if we're sinned against and if we bear the image of God, how does God feel?"

4. The Image of God and Divine Compassion

The discussion explores the theological concept that humans, created in God's image, experience emotions just as God does. This anthropomorphic depiction helps believers relate their pain to God's compassionate nature.

Joel Muddamalle [10:17]: "As hurt as we do."

Lysa TerKeurst [10:57]: "It rarely occurs to me to put the word broken and God together... I always picture God as steady, he's calm."

5. Scriptural Insights: Psalms and Romans

Joel references the Psalms to illustrate how biblical narratives depict honesty in struggling with trust in God. The conversation also touches on Romans 12:19-21, advocating for leaving vengeance to God and responding to evil with good.

Joel Muddamalle [15:13]: "But it's like, really what I want, what my human heart wants is to execute vengeance."

Joel Muddamalle [16:03]: "Romans 12:19... vengeance belongs to me. I will repay, says the Lord."

6. Balancing Justice and Vengeance

Jim Cress and Joel discuss the human inclination toward vengeance versus the biblical call for justice handled by God. They explore the therapeutic and spiritual benefits of reframing desires for revenge into trusting God's ultimate justice.

Jim Cress [14:30]: "I want you to hurt in the ways that I've hurt 100%."

Joel Muddamalle [15:19]: "This is spiritual maturity and this is becoming Christlike."

7. Joel’s Personal Anecdote: Practicing Humility and Forgiveness

Joel shares a relatable story from his experience in the sauna, where a misunderstanding led to a confrontation. His initial reaction of anger transforms into humility and forgiveness, exemplifying the principles discussed.

Joel Muddamalle [20:41]: "I said, sir, sir, sir, sir, sir, sir. I said, I'm sorry, man. I Disrespected you."

Joel Muddamalle [24:20]: "He apologized too. It shows what kind of man you are to have apologized the way that you did."

8. Choosing Peace Over Bitterness

Lysa emphasizes the importance of cultivating personal peace through forgiveness and responsible actions rather than seeking to control or punish those who have wronged us. She underscores the biblical assurance that sowing goodness will lead to reaping positive outcomes.

Lysa TerKeurst [25:13]: "If we want peace in our life, then we have to set up ourselves to experience peace. We have to walk into a room bringing peace."

Lysa TerKeurst [30:00]: "What we sow, we do eventually reap. I choose to sow wise choices. I choose to sow forgiveness."

9. Final Reflections: Trusting in Divine Justice

The conversation concludes with a reaffirmation of trusting God's justice and mercy. Lysa highlights the biblical truth that God's handling of sin and injustice is both just and merciful, encouraging listeners to focus on their own healing and spiritual growth.

Lysa TerKeurst [31:47]: "You can know it because it is Amen. And that is something that you can count on."

Key Takeaways

• Understanding Broken Trust: It's essential to recognize that being hurt is not just a personal struggle but also a theological issue involving sin against God.

• Forgiveness as a Process: Forgiving the fact of the wrongdoing and the impact it has on one's life requires time and intentionality.

• Divine Compassion: God, being in our image, experiences and empathizes with our pain, encouraging an honest dialogue with Him.

• Rejecting Vengeance: Adhering to biblical principles means leaving vengeance to God and responding to evil with goodness.

• Personal Responsibility: Cultivating peace within oneself through forgiveness and responsible actions fosters healing and aligns with God's kingdom ethics.

Notable Quotes

• Lysa TerKeurst [01:29]: "When talking about broken Trust, I think one of the hardest things to process is what do I do when it feels like the person who hurt me just got away with it?"

• Joel Muddamalle [10:17]: "As hurt as we do."

• Jim Cress [14:30]: "I want you to hurt in the ways that I've hurt 100%."

• Lysa TerKeurst [25:13]: "If we want peace in our life, then we have to set up ourselves to experience peace."

• Lysa TerKeurst [30:00]: "What we sow, we do eventually reap. I choose to sow wise choices. I choose to sow forgiveness."

This episode of "Therapy and Theology" offers a profound exploration of trusting God amid personal suffering and injustice. Through personal anecdotes, theological insights, and biblical references, Lysa, Jim, and Joel provide listeners with both spiritual and therapeutic tools to navigate their struggles with broken trust and forgiveness.