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- [00:01]
A
I have been trying to get today's guest on this podcast for over a year, and she finally said yes. You are in for a treat today. Welcome to the Upside podcast, where we help you get unstuck in life and business by elevating your thinking and provoking meaningful change from the inside out. I have my daughter, Juliet Joy Flood with us today, better known as Jet. Welcome, baby girl, to the podcast.
- [00:25]
B
Hi.
- [00:26]
A
I'm so happy you're here. You are wise beyond your years, and I have been trying to get you to say yes to this. Of course, it's hard to schedule because you're a very busy girl. Yes, you are very busy. But you just graduated the eighth grade.
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B
Yes.
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A
Congratulations.
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B
Thank you.
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A
So we're going to talk today about some lessons you learned in middle school.
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B
All right.
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A
And you had a pretty good middle school experience, wouldn't you say?
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B
Yeah, I think I had a pretty good experience.
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A
I think you did. I think some people have really challenging middle school experiences. I would say overall, you had a pretty good one, but you did have some challenges along the way. No doubt about it.
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B
Yes.
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A
And some lessons learned, but very, very proud of you and who you are. So I just want to. I'm going to ask you some questions, and you just answer them however you want, okay?
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B
Okay.
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A
That's how this goes.
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B
All right.
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A
So what would you say you learned about friendship over there? So middle school for you was three years? Six, seventh, and eighth grade? Yes. Not everybody listening to this has middle school. You know, schools that are the same. So for you, this was 6th, 7th, and 8th grade. What did you learn about friendships in middle school?
- [01:29]
B
I feel like one thing that, like, you always, like, expressed to us is friendships aren't always for a lifetime or sometimes for a season. And I feel like that kind of came into play because I feel like you're never gonna have all of the same friends for every single year in your life, because things are gonna change. So just kind of learning how to, like, adapt and to, like, figure out your real friends from, like, you're not. Maybe not as real friends and your closer friends tomorrow. That you're just, like, not as close friends.
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A
Yeah, yeah. So just navigating the changes of friendships and finding your tribe.
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B
Yeah.
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A
Yeah. And it being okay if those friendships change over time because you've had a lot of over the last three years kind of friendships just in change, and I think that is part of life. So much of middle school is about friendships.
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B
Yes.
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A
Okay, let's talk about a moment in middle school that you feel really? You felt really proud of yourself?
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B
Oh, yes. I have a story for this one.
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A
Okay. Can't wait.
- [02:29]
B
I was in science class this year in eighth grade, and we were picking what we wanted for science fair project to be. Knowing me, I like sports. So I was like, I'm gonna pick one that involves sports. I see.
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A
Like a good choice.
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B
Which one? Which drink makes you run the fastest? So I picked five different drinks and I just had to run a quarter a mile and time it five times. Well, knowing me, I'm not also the greatest at math. And it turns out you have to run each one three times. So I ran a quarter of a mile 15 times, which is over three miles. And that was quite challenging because I barely had enough time because I also left it to the last minute.
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A
Yeah, there was that.
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B
I ended up getting an A, which was good. A few sore muscles, but it was an ace.
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A
Okay, but hang on just a second. So, yes, so you chose a project that seemed really good in theory. You waited a little to the last minute. And so what would have to happen? You were having to get up early in the morning and come home sometimes after activities and do your quarter of a mile run because you also couldn't do them back to back because it would change the results. So you'd have to drink whatever, a glass of cherry juice and then go run a quarter of a mile.
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B
Chocolate milk. Chocolate milk.
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A
Okay, again, this is already becoming worse and worse of an idea.
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B
Yes.
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A
And so I think you were maybe halfway through the experiment, right. And you came to me and were like, mom, can I just make up my results? You're like, nobody's gonna know. I kind of know already which one's gonna win. And what did I tell you?
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B
Nope.
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A
Nope. I did tell you. Nope. Although I have to be honest, I thought about saying, yeah, just do that. Who really cares? I mean, I did. I was honestly conflicted about it because I thought, this poor child is having to run at 9 o' clock at night after drinking cherry juice. But I told you no. And you said, okay. You had a good attitude about it mostly. And so you did the whole thing, like legitimate did the whole thing.
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B
I did do the whole thing.
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A
And do you remember exactly what you told told me after you completed it?
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B
I'm very proud of myself.
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A
Yeah, you literally said those words. You said, mom, I'm so proud of myself.
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B
Yeah, it was hard, but I did it, so I'm happy.
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A
Yeah, I was really proud of you for that. I thought that was a great life lesson of just number One, committing to what you say you're going to commit to doing what you say you're going to do, doing the hard stuff. And that always results in feeling pride at the end of it and your confidence increasing. So good job, babe. Okay. What do you think middle school teaches you about confidence?
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B
I feel like, for me, it's like, I'm very confident person that I feel like it teaches you. I feel like a lot of people take the opportunity to blend in, and I feel like it's a good. It's a good chance to, you know, show your confidence, and I feel like teaching you confidence as far as, like, there's going to be a lot of stuff that you kind of have to step up for in middle school, and there's going to be a lot of things that you need to work on in middle school and a lot of changes that are going to happen. So if you put your mindset as I'm just going to be myself and be confident, then, you know, honestly, things come a little bit more easier because you're not worried about everyone else thinking about you, but you're worried about yourself and what you think of yourself, because that's honestly more important.
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A
Yeah. That's how. When you go to sleep at night, that's what matters the most, right?
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B
Yep.
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A
I asked you. We were driving down the road a few weeks ago, and I asked you, I said, why are you so confident? Because I really was not as confident as you are when I was in eighth grade. I was more fearful. And you said. Do you remember what you said?
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B
Kind of.
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A
What did you say?
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B
It's like, I'm Jet and I, like, love myself, and I'm. Yeah, I'm confident in myself.
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A
You said, I like being me.
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B
I like being me. Yeah.
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A
And I like you being you, too. That's a hard. That's a hard lesson for you, and I hope that you keep that. Keep valuing what makes you special and unique. And you were always like that. That's why you wore shark shirts.
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B
That was a stage. Yes.
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A
It was A long, long stage of your life was shark shirts. And you definitely didn't care what anyone thought.
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B
But I rocked the shark shirt. You did.
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A
I mean, looking back on the pictures you did. The shark shirts, the shark shoes, the shark room. So many sharks. Yes, you did, baby girl. Okay, so how did you handle drama, gossip, Maybe feeling left out at times?
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B
Well, hopefully most people won't have to deal with that too much because you'll fix. Equip yourself with the right friends. But I feel like A part of being a teenager and being in school, especially in middle school, is there's a lot of that, and avoiding it completely is difficult.
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A
Yeah.
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B
But you just kind of have to put yourself in the right crowd, and you never want to be in the middle of it. And, you know, the bottom line is you stick up for what you believe, not just because your friend thinks that or because, you know, maybe that everyone else thinks that. You know, you always stick up for what you think is right. And I would just say, like, feeling left out. If you feel like you're being left out from a group of people in a crowd, then maybe they're not the right people for you. Because if you. I mean, if you're you, then people should love hanging out with you. So, you know, you just got to put yourself with the right people.
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A
That's so true. What you learn about being kind, I
- [07:49]
B
mean, you never know what people are going through. And I remember this one time, there was this girl. We always walk to the park after school, and there's this girl with crutches, and. And she had, like, a little crate that she was rolling. So she'd crunch one, she'd roll the crate, she'd crush the other, and she'd roll the crate. Like, I. I watched. I sat in there, watched her for, like, a minute. I'm like, I gotta go help her. So I ran up and asked if she needed help, and her mom wasn't there yet. She's in sixth grade.
- [08:12]
A
And this is when you were in eighth grade?
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B
Yeah. So I was two years older, and we just sat on the grass waiting for her mom to get there, and we were just talking for, like, a while. And every other day after that, pretty much, I'd see her in the hallway and be like, wave to each other. And I feel like you have all those hallway friends and, like, you never know, like, a difference that that wave or that high or that fist bump or high five can do to your hallway friends. So even just having hallway friends is important. And being kind to everyone that you see, putting a smile on your face is always important.
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A
You know, hallway friends, it's. It's funny that you call it that because it is true. You see the same people.
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B
People.
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A
Right. Every time. And I think as adults, we don't necessarily have hallway friends in the same way because we're not in a big group of people all of the time. But you may be at the same Starbucks or at the gym, and you just have that commonality and acknowledging people and making people feel seen I don't really like making people feel seen at the gym because I don't really want anyone to talk to me if I'm being completely honest. And I think you're so right, Sweeney is just acknowledging somebody and making them feel seen really does make a huge difference.
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B
Yes.
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A
You never know what that's going to mean to someone.
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B
So.
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A
So the question here, and I, I'm going to kind of push you on an answer that I want you to talk about.
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B
Okay.
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A
The question was, did middle school change the way you see yourself? And I want you to talk a little bit about your accident prone little self and which I, I'm also laughing about you helping the girl with the crutches because you, I'm sure, felt empathetic towards her because you've been on crutches a fair, a fair amount of times yourself. So I think you probably related to her very well. But talk about how you've grown over the last couple years, dealing with injuries and how you see yourself differently than you maybe did when you were in elementary school.
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B
Yeah, I mean, probably broke my arm a few times, broke my thumb, broke a few fingers, broke my nose, been on crutches a few times. It's a lot of stuff.
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A
Yeah, we have a medical clinic basically in our laundry room closet of all jets braces if you need any.
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B
Yeah, we're available. But yeah, I feel like getting hurt a lot. There's a lot of it that's from playing sports and from being clumsy. But I feel like over the years like I used to take weeks and I mean like weeks and weeks and weeks to get better. And it was just like this cycle of like being great and like loving being able to play sports and then just being at a dead stop. And honestly, you never really see growth when you're inconsistent and being injured a lot kind of helps that inconsistency, stay inconsistent. And so I feel like over the years like, you know, everyone's always saying I get a little tougher. Yeah, yeah, you got to kind of power through some stuff. And I feel like over the years I've, I've done a pretty good job on doing that. And because, you know, you never want to be the weak link or the person always injured. So you know, sometimes you got to go a little bit tougher. But you also got to realize that injuries do happen with being active. So there's a good, there's a good line defying the both. But I feel like middle school has helped me grow, be a little bit tougher in that and Helped me a lot in that, too.
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A
Yeah, I see a lot of growth in you in that. I think one of the things when you were younger, you. You had a lot of fear of maybe walking on a sore ankle again until it was a hundred percent better. And you've learned how to push through pain and kind of deal with some of. Some of that on the process of getting better. And I do think you've gotten tougher, and I think that's. I think that is a really cool thing to. To that you've pushed yourself and push yourself out of your comfort zone a little bit.
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B
Yeah. Cause it's. It's like, as much as you think it's a physical thing, it's more of a mental thing for most of it because, you know, there's only so much a doctor can do. And getting tougher physically helps you mentally, and that helps you, you know, with your challenges in life and helps you just see yourself in a different way. It's cool.
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A
That's a mic drop right there, baby girl. Okay. You've had a few challenges with some different teachers and coaches that may be. We will not use any names, of course, but we. We've talked about some of those challenges and looked at, okay, how do we. How do we role model after the teachers and coaches that are amazing, what do we learn from them? And then. But what did you learn, maybe from some of the challenging experiences about what kind of leader you want to be, both now and in the future?
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B
Yeah, I feel like that's a good thing to look at. Like, sometimes kids are like, well, what the heck? Like, why are we doing? Like, why do they do this? Why did they do. And it's hard to tell if it's beneficial for you or just an obstacle in your way that you have to learn how to get around. And almost like a boost that you have to kind of work with, because some things teachers do and coaches do to get you better, and some things they do maybe just because they may be a little bit lazy or they maybe don't know exactly what they need to be doing. So I feel like being a leader in the future, I really want to make sure they have a positive attitude, you know, kind of never giving up, never quitting, being encouraging. Because I feel like being a leader, growth is really important. Like, if you're any kind of leader in life, you want to lead your team or lead your group through a growth journey, you never want to be getting worse. You always want to be getting better at everything you do. And I feel like an encouraging aspect of that doesn't mean they can't push you, but I feel like they need to be encouraging and keep you going and making sure that, you know, as a leader that they just, they, they push you in the right direction instead of hold you back.
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A
That's good. So not just being focused on the end result, but being focused on the journey.
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B
Yes.
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A
Yeah.
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B
I remember our 8th grade quote this year was like, make the journey as most as much important as the destination. I think that that's pretty important.
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A
That was your Shimmel Fetig Middle School quote of the year.
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B
Yeah, eighth grade. It was on the eighth grade shirt. Oh, yeah, it was.
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A
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like that. And I think that's really true. If you can make the journey because life is a journey. And then once you get to the destination, either you're going to sit and camp out there or you're going to keep going on a journey. So if you don't enjoy the journey, you're not going to enjoy much of life. It's true. Yeah. As dad would say, vacation line, getting there is half the fun. Okay, what advice would you give some a younger kid that's going into middle school?
- [14:51]
B
I feel like I might have mentioned this earlier, but I feel like a lot of people can take middle school as a fit in time period. Right. You're just trying to get through like you're just trying to get to the high school to get through everything. And people take it as, you know, a confident D boost instead of a confident boost. And they feel like something that people should do is take it as well. I mean, I'm starting this new point in my life, so I'm going to be more confident, so I'm going to be more kind to others. So I'm going to start something that brings me success in the future. And I feel like as if there's any little kids doing in most me know to keep, you know, obviously keep working hard in what you're doing. But take it as a time to find yourself more than find what other people want of yourself. And being super confident and being just super like a fun person like you, you want to find the right friends in the right time. And if you don't get a best friend right away, that's okay because you know you'll find your people and it's important that you don't just go jump into things so quickly because you honestly, at the end of the day, you want to keep yourself importantly and you want to make sure that you know, you're staying confident and putting your prior some priorities first.
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A
Good word, good word. Okay, last question. Are you most excited for. For high school next year?
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B
No. Hate schmulfendick, but I'm really excited to leave. Yeah, it's, it's been a fun three years, but it's, it's exciting to move on. I'm excited for hopefully, you know, I'm gonna be able to start driving soon and just to, you know, get started more on sports, more focus on sports, you know, just. I don't know, I'm excited to just start like a new chapter and hopefully grow a lot more.
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A
So I know you're mostly excited about driving. Let's be real.
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B
Yeah, that's pretty exciting.
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A
I know you got to drive with daddy for the first time out at the ranch. Like a real car.
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B
I did. It was fun. I think I did a pretty good job.
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A
Yeah. So that's what you think.
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B
That's what dad thought.
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A
You do okay. I think you're going to be a great driver. I'm just seizing hands. I'm laughing because you're going to be at Clark High School, which we're sitting right now at Studio USA recording this. And so I told Mr. Rick that he's going to go on the approved list of emergency contacts since he could literally, he's like right across the street. So if you're sick at school, I'm just going to have Rick come pick you up at school. Just kidding. All right, Jet, you've been amazing. Thanks for joining me on the pod.
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B
Thanks for having me.
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A
All right, everybody, there you have it straight from my 14 year old daughter. All of the lessons learned in middle school. It's funny, as she has been thinking about her middle school reflections, I've been reflecting a little bit on my middle school experience and I'm honestly glad it's over. And yet those are such formative years for all of us. And so I'm just excited for you, Juliet, and for your sister and maybe we'll get Jillian on here sooner than later, talk about something. Um, but as always, thank you for listening to the Upside. When you invest in your own growth every single day, it will yield you great, great returns. Keep living on the upside.