Podcast Summary: TheUPside Podcast

Episode: When Fear Shows Up: How to Recognize and Reframe Your Response
Host: Theresa Flood
Date: October 28, 2025

Overview

In this episode, host Theresa Flood unpacks how fear manifests in our everyday lives—not just in obviously frightening situations like haunted houses, but also in our personal and professional decisions. Drawing on an amusing but memorable Halloween experience with her family at SeaWorld’s Fright Fest, Theresa explores the “Four F’s” of fear responses: Flight, Freeze, Fight, and Fawn. Her goal is to help listeners recognize their habitual responses to fear and learn how to reframe these reactions to foster personal growth, courage, and leadership.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Fear as a Daily Companion

• Theresa opens with a vivid story about getting spooked at SeaWorld’s Fright Fest with her kids (00:45–04:40).
  • She and her daughter Jet bolted for the exit when menacing actors approached—an immediate, classic flight response.
  • Each family member responded differently, illustrating how fear shows up uniquely for everyone.
• Quote:
  “We were literally the example of the ways that fear shows up in person.” (04:10 - Theresa)

2. Recognizing the Four F’s of Fear (05:05–07:30)

• Theresa introduces the classic four human responses to fear:
  • Flight: Running away/avoiding.
  • Freeze: Becoming stuck or indecisive.
  • Fight: Direct confrontation or misplaced aggression.
  • Fawn: People-pleasing or appeasing to avoid conflict.

3. Deep Dive: The Four Fear Responses

Flight: Avoidance and Overreaction (07:35–10:45)

• Flight often means dodging tough tasks, delaying calls, or avoiding hard conversations.
• We often disguise avoidance as being "too busy," but at the core, it's rooted in fear.
• Quote:
  “If we can just run away from it and avoid it, well, then we don’t have to be afraid.” (09:15 - Theresa)
• Listeners are challenged to reflect on what they’re putting off due to fear.

Freeze: Indecision and Analysis Paralysis (10:45–13:50)

• Freezing is getting "stuck"—not making decisions or taking action.
• Often presents as preparing endlessly or striving for perfection as a cover for fear.
• Quote:
  “If you’re constantly getting ready to get ready, I would challenge you and ask, are you stuck in freeze mode because you’re afraid to start?” (12:20 - Theresa)
• Prolonging action only prolongs fear; taking the first step is key.

Fight: Misplaced Blame and Energy (13:50–16:35)

• Fight responses look like lashing out or blaming others—often a sign of internal fear projected outward.
• Theresa connects this to experiences where people "launch" at others over bad news.
• Quote:
  “Fight mode often makes enemies as opposed to solving the real problem.” (15:45 - Theresa)
• She humorously wonders how many haunted house actors get punched by startled guests.

Fawn: People-Pleasing and Lowered Standards (16:35–18:50)

• Fawning is less discussed but involves appeasing others, sometimes lowering standards or values in response to fear.
• Theresa compares this to her husband, who laughs off haunted house scares—sometimes a defense mechanism.
• Quote:
  “How many times when really it’s a fear issue, do we lower our standards? Do we appease other people? Do we not do the right thing because we want to make other people happy?” (18:30 - Theresa)

4. Self-Reflection and Reframing Fear (18:50–22:30)

• Theresa encourages listeners to inventory where they’re avoiding, freezing, fighting, or fawning in their own lives.
• Notable Moment:
  “Remember, indecision is a decision.” (19:45)
• She emphasizes that naming the response breaks the cycle—awareness is the first step to reclaiming power over fear.
• Often, we justify fearful responses as wisdom, busyness, or perfectionism.

5. Reclaiming Agency: Practical Steps (22:35–24:30)

• Slow down, breathe, pause, and examine:
  “What is true? Where is the threat actually happening? Is there even a threat here?” (22:50)
• The solution: Choose aligned, courageous action—taking even a small step forward reduces fear’s hold.

Memorable Quotes

• "Being courageous is not being fearless. You don’t have to be fearless. You have to be courageous. Or fear less.” (23:20 - Theresa)
• “Standing, waiting for the next monster just prolongs the fear. Just step out there and do it, essentially get it over with and you’ll realize it wasn’t so bad.” (13:35 - Theresa)
• “Awareness is going to break the cycle.” (21:15 - Theresa)
• “Let’s not be spooky fearful, but let’s step out in faith, step out, encourage.” (24:10 - Theresa)

Important Timestamps

• 00:45 – SeaWorld Fright Fest story: Setting up the theme of fear.
• 05:05 – Introduction of the four fear responses (Flight, Freeze, Fight, Fawn).
• 07:35 – Deep dive into Flight/Avoidance.
• 10:45 – Exploring Freeze/Indecision.
• 13:50 – Understanding Fight/Blame responses.
• 16:35 – The less-discussed Fawn/People-pleasing response.
• 18:50 – Reflection: Inventorying your own fear behaviors.
• 22:35 – Tools to reframe fear and act with courage.
• 24:10 – Closing encouragement.

Conclusion & Takeaways

Theresa wraps up with a motivational reminder: Courage is about taking action in the face of fear—not about being fearless. She encourages listeners to name their fear responses, gain awareness, and take even small first steps toward growth and leadership. The final message: confronting fear is essential for success in life and business.

Call to Action:
“When you invest in your growth every single day, it will yield you great returns.” (24:25)

For listeners seeking practical mindset shifts and actionable advice on overcoming fear responses, this episode delivers personal stories, relatable analogies, and clear steps to get ‘unstuck’—all wrapped in Theresa’s warm, direct style.