Ep 288: An Episode Full Of False Accusations

Summary

Podcast Summary: "This Is Important" – Ep 288: An Episode Full Of False Accusations

Date: March 3, 2026
Hosts: Adam Devine, Anders Holm ("Ders"), Blake Anderson, Kyle Newacheck
Production: iHeartPodcasts

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Episode Overview

In Episode 288, the hosts dive into a raucous and playful discussion that revolves around the titular “false accusations,” conspiracy theories, the absurdity of social etiquette (especially around party invites), the NBA All-Star Weekend, and the nature of fame and public scandal. The show is heavy on improvisational humor, riffing, and satirical takes on uncomfortable topics—including but not limited to Epstein files, LeBron’s legacy anxiety, and why nobody wants to freeze leftover pizza. As always, the tone is irreverent, self-deprecating, and deliberately provocative.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Opening Bit: False Accusations & Epstein Files (03:21–09:04)

• The hosts open with a running joke about Adam being in the "Epstein files," sparking a freewheeling, mock-paranoid riff about conspiracy, elite circles, and being named in scandals, with absurd denials and finger-pointing.
• Anders shares an awkward real-life encounter where a stranger at a cafe opens conversation with "How about the latest with the Epstein files?"—prompting genuine discomfort and speculation about random LA weirdos possibly being failed actors “living in character.”
• Notable Quote:
  • Ders: "This isn't Kevin... This is a curb your enthusiasm character." (06:24)
  • Adam: "Kyle is not about that life when push comes to shove." (08:58)

Timestamps:

• 03:21 - Blake opens with “Not much. What's up with you, Epstein files?”
• 04:47 - Story of the stranger who brings up Epstein files at brunch.
• 06:46 - Stranger accuses Ders of being undercover Secret Service because of his hat.

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2. Satirizing Modern Paranoia & Cultural Anxiety (09:21–15:28)

• The group debates the psychology of obsessives and “rabbit-hole” personalities, joking about QAnon, Luciferian conspiracies, and the LA tendency toward performative behavior.
• Speculation that these types might just be failed actors or method enthusiasts exploring a character on unsuspecting civilians.
• Tongue-in-cheek debate about who "looks like" they’re in a scandal, and riffing on how “everyone’s in the Epstein files.”
• Notable Quote:
  • Blake: "He did go a little qanon during the pandemic. He did." (09:26)
  • Ders: “It’s a psychological experiment—or this LA guy has just had something horrible happen and this is how it comes out.” (09:39)

Timestamps:

• 09:21 – The “weirdness of LA” and actors in public
• 10:08 – Improv exercises as disguised personality disorders

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3. 80s/90s Childhood Movies and Trauma (11:14–14:39)

• Nostalgic detour into freaky kids’ movies—“Little Monsters,” “Aladdin,” and the psychology of 80s/90s films about bullying, imagination, and monsters lurking under the bed.
• Debate on whether “Aladdin” ripped off “Little Monsters” (blue-skinned magical buddies), and on the function of monsters in kids’ media.
• Memorable Moment: Adam describes the terrifying villain in “Little Monsters,” and the hosts joke about childhood TV traumas.

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4. NBA All-Star Weekend: Celebrity Sightings & Dunk Contest Beef (15:14–22:24)

• Blake recounts attending NBA All-Star events, sitting courtside, and star-gazing (Chris Tucker’s “sparkly jacket game”), while lamenting the lack of big stars in current dunk contests.
• Spirited debate about why modern NBA stars like LeBron won’t risk embarrassment by entering the dunk contest; how public failure and social media scrutiny affect modern athletes’ legacies compared to “old heads” like Jordan.
• Notable Quotes:
  • Blake: “I would rather see them try and fail than not try at all... It’s so made to be worried about your legacy or whatever.” (22:01)
  • Adam: “Jordan didn’t have social media breathing down his throat. If he knew stuff would get out that quick he wouldn’t have done it.” (21:04)
  • Ders: “You have to be able to step up in those moments and dominate.” (19:47)

Timestamps:

• 15:14 – Blake’s All-Star Weekend rundown
• 18:10 – Historic shift in attitude post-Kobe/LeBron
• 20:26 – What if LeBron failed—a debate over athletic risk and ego

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5. Cancel Culture, Comedy Taboo, and “Legalized Comedy” (24:29–27:10)

• The crew lampoon their own willingness to talk about controversial topics, mocking their status as “cutting edge” comedians, then joking their attempts at dangerous conversation are their “dunk contest” attempts: sometimes you hit your head, sometimes you stick the landing.
• Notable Quote:
  • Adam: “At least we tried. This is our dunk contest. We came out here and tried to dunk it.” (26:59)

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6. Satirical Obsession with Being in the Files (25:42–27:34)

• Extended bit where each jokingly accuses the other of being in the Epstein files, being “good at blackmail,” or being some kind of supervillain.
• Meta-humor about how even joking about such topics puts them at the edge of what’s acceptable—“the comedians who say anything can be funny.”

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7. Modern RSVP Etiquette & Partiful App Rant (43:48–47:55, recurring until 70:55)

• Adam, Blake, and Ders spiral into a surprisingly detailed and passionate argument about the confusion and annoyance caused by modern digital invite apps like Partiful vs. old-school methods (Evite, texts).
• Tension between the need to manage “head counts” for kids’ birthday parties and nostalgia for “just inviting and hoping for the best.”
• Notable Quotes:
  • Adam: “Why do we have to do everything through our phones? Why can’t I just text ‘I’m coming’?” (44:01)
  • Blake: “It’s so our wives know the head count and don’t have to go through texts.” (44:49)

Timestamps:

• 43:48 – Party planning headache
• 44:33 – Adam’s rant against Partiful
• 45:10 – Ders complaints about invites from people he barely knows
• 66:03 – Suggestions to integrate meal choices, activities into RSVP apps (“Are you gonna eat? Gonna dance?”)

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8. Mountain Mike's Pizza, Leftover Angst, and Freezer Philosophy (62:41–72:00)

• Droll, detailed discussion about pizza over-ordering at kids’ parties, how leftover pizza never freezes well, and the anxiety of under- or over-catering for toddlers.
• Adam derides the idea of freezing takeout pizza, declaring it “turns into complete asshole.” (70:16)
• Debate over appetite, portion control, and the false hope that small children will eat enough to justify multiple pizzas.

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9. Grill Master Dreams vs. Self-Actualization (71:31–75:46)

• The hosts reflect on the trope of dads and men aspiring toward “grill master” status, with Adam expressing discomfort about performing “corny dad” rituals, while Blake and Ders defend the fun of BBQ experimentation even if you’re not perfect at it.
• Satirical sidebar about “finding yourself” in midlife by buying black BBQ gloves and chasing brisket perfection.

Notable Quotes:

• Adam: “Any time you start to really get passionate about barbecuing, it starts to get quiet horny.” (72:57)
• Ders: "No one is born to do anything except eating shit." (74:24)
• Adam: “Maybe not having a point of view—maybe anti-comedy is the new comedy.” (51:18)

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10. Party App Tension Revisited & Final Slams (68:10–76:47)

• A confused mutual realization that multiple hosts have been inadvertently invited to events by someone they barely remember—Partiful’s impersonal reach.
• Adam confronts Blake about being “the muscle” for RSVP head-count enforcement, and jokes that Chloe (Blake’s partner) is pulling the strings behind the scenes.
• Wrap-up features the classic segment: “Any takebacks, apologies, epic slams?” with more mock-accusations about being named in “the files” (76:22), and Blake needling Adam about his discomfort with controversial topics.

Notable Quotes:

• Adam: “You grill me about RSVP, but I get it… you’re kind of the muscle.” (68:57)
• Blake: “Why are you so nervous? Why are you so scared to talk about the files?” (76:37)

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

• Ders (06:27): “This is a curb your enthusiasm character.”
• Blake (22:01): “I would rather see them try and fail than not try at all.”
• Adam (51:18): “Maybe anti-comedy is the new comedy.”
• Adam (70:16): “As soon as you freeze Mountain Mike, it turns into complete asshole.”
• Blake (76:37): “Why are you so nervous? Why are you so scared to talk about the files?”
• Ders (74:24): "No one is born to do anything except eating shit."

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Other Noteworthy Segments

• Childhood Movie Trauma: Extended nostalgia for traumatizing kids movies (“Little Monsters,” “Jumanji”) and their psychological lessons.
• NBA All-Star Star Power: Disappointment in the state of modern celebrity dunks and longing for stars of the past.
• Tech Fatigue: Extended griping about overwhelming reliance on apps—from party invites to digital weather forecasting.
• Dad Party Math: Detailed strategizing (and failure) around feeding a horde of toddlers at kids' parties.
• Godzilla & Monster Flicks: Brief tour through the joys and absurdities of old monster movies, from 1950s Godzilla to 1970s karate-dog monsters.

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Final Thoughts

The episode is a meandering, joke-filled roast of everything from modern paranoia and digital etiquette to fatherhood and legacy anxiety. The hosts are at their best when chasing down a tangent, piling on, and drawing out the absurdities of contemporary life—especially when the discussion gets lost in the weeds of apps, leftover pizza, and the imaginary crimes of being “in the files.”

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For Fans Of:
Improv-heavy, no-holds-barred comedy with tangents on current events, meta-humor, and heavy doses of mock controversy.

Recommended Listening:

• [16:41–19:06] — NBA nostalgia vs. modern athletes’ media anxiety
• [43:48–47:55] — Modern RSVP app/party etiquette debate
• [62:41–70:16] — Pizza party math and leftover-wrangling
• [70:55–75:46] — Grill master anxiety and the “corniness” of passion

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Listener Takeaway:
If you didn’t listen, expect a high-energy, chaotically funny hour where no topic is sacred, every accusation is a bit, and the line between earnest crisis and performed outrage is always intentionally blurry.

Transcript

[Adam Devine]

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[Ders]

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[Ders]

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[Adam Devine]

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[Ders]

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[Adam Devine]

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[Ders]

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[Ders]

And finally, what if your wifi was like the smartest wifi?

[Adam Devine]

Yeah, it's wifi that is so smart it makes everything work better together. Bott Xfinity is smart and reliable.

[Ders]

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[Ders]

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[Public Investing Announcer]

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[Ders]

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[Adam Devine]

Welcome to this is Important, a production of iHeartRadio, the show where we only talk about what is most obviously very crucially important. Today on this Is Important.

[Ders]

Let me get some ice out of your butt crack.

[Adam Devine]

We're kind of doing the tight thing right now, dude, by, like, freaking partying and drinking beer.

[Blake Anderson]

Nah, you're not gonna get me with that.

[Adam Devine]

Let's go. That shit's important.

[Blake Anderson]

Boys are bad Legalized comedy. Everybody's coming.

[Adam Devine]

What's up, fellas?

[Blake Anderson]

Not much. What' with you, Epstein files?

[Adam Devine]

How is that how you open the show, dude?

[Blake Anderson]

What's up with you, dude? What's up with you, dude?

[Adam Devine]

Epstein, you bring it up. Every single pod.

[Blake Anderson]

Well, because I know you're in them. Because I know you're in them, dude,

[Adam Devine]

there's no way Elite. I'm not that elite. I'm not that elite.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, none of us are, dude.

[Ders]

None of us are funny. Epstein story. Oh, God.

[Adam Devine]

Go again.

[Ders]

Today I get lunch with he who Shall Not Be Named Voldemort.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh. Jessine Maxwell. Jizzling close.

[Ders]

Kyle. New A check.

[Blake Anderson]

Okay. Speaking of it, we're sitting.

[Ders]

We're sitting at, like, an outdoor table. It's a little chilly here with the only people outdoors at this, like, cafe getting some brunch water trash. And this guy walks up and I go, hey, look. Looks like Kevin Etten. And it kind of did.

[Blake Anderson]

Kevin Etten was the showrunner of Workaholics.

[Ders]

Showrunner of Workaholics.

[Adam Devine]

Very, very funny. Very.

[Blake Anderson]

For people that don't know, this is inside baseball. Very funny, man. Wrote Anaconda.

[Adam Devine]

Wrote Anaconda.

[Public Investing Announcer]

The.

[Adam Devine]

The new one, not the old one.

[Ders]

And Kyle clocks the dude walking up, and he comes up to, like, a door that's locked, and he goes, is it closed? And I'm like, no, it's open. You just have to go to this door behind me. And he goes, okay, how about the latest with the Epstein files, huh?

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, Kyle's in deep, isn't he?

[Ders]

No, no, no, no, no, no. The guy. The guy.

[Blake Anderson]

What guy?

[Adam Devine]

At the door. Sorry.

[Ders]

The guy who walked up that looks like Kevin Netten.

[Blake Anderson]

This is the story that you decided to open the podcast?

[Adam Devine]

Well, you said Epstein.

[Ders]

You said Epstein. What are we talking about here? See ya.

[Blake Anderson]

Well, I was zip zap zopping. I could just tell Blake's eyes that he's Always thinking of Epstein.

[Ders]

I'm yet. And I'm yes.

[Adam Devine]

Anding.

[Ders]

And I'm yes. Anding.

[Blake Anderson]

Okay, so sorry. Sorry.

[Adam Devine]

Jersey is riding your way. This is your wave.

[Ders]

Thank you.

[Adam Devine]

Welcome to your show.

[Blake Anderson]

Thanks.

[Ders]

And Adam, off a pod afterwards, let me know what stories to tell. This guy walks up, door locked or closed? No door open over here. Oh, thanks. How about the latest with these Epstein files?

[Adam Devine]

Okay.

[Ders]

Kyle just goes, huh? I'm like, this dude just out. Kyled Kyle, right?

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Ders]

And then Kyle goes, I don't know. He goes, have you seen it? Are you guys paying attention? You've seen the latest? And Kyle's like, a little. We're thrown. This dude's coming in.

[Blake Anderson]

Why? Why are you so thrown? Why are people so afraid to talk about Epstein?

[Adam Devine]

That's a weird thing for a stranger.

[Ders]

Adam. Adam, you're saying what comes next?

[Adam Devine]

Yeah, he goes.

[Ders]

Kyle's like, I don't know. He's like, what do you mean you don't know? You don't care? And, like, I turn around, full, full me. And I just go, you know, I haven't seen my buddy in a real long time, and I'd really like to just continue the conversation we're having.

[Adam Devine]

Did you say, wait, did you say confin you first? Or did you say continue?

[Ders]

I said both. And then he goes, oh, interesting. You don't want to talk about the Epstein files, huh?

[Adam Devine]

This is a stranger at the door.

[Ders]

This is a stranger on the street.

[Adam Devine]

This isn't Kevin.

[Blake Anderson]

This is a curb your enthusiasm character.

[Ders]

And then he goes. He goes like. He's like, why are you. Are you scared about the. Not satanism. He goes, lu. Luciferism or lu. Lucifer ology or some shit. And Kyle's like. Kyle's like, I don't. I don't really know anything. We're just trying to have some brunch here.

[Blake Anderson]

Say it.

[Ders]

And then I was wearing, like, an arch tail terex hat. And he goes, my man. You know who wears arc teryx hats? Huh?

[Adam Devine]

What?

[Ders]

Secret service under undercover agents. And I was like, all right, I'm

[Blake Anderson]

trying to have brunch with this guy.

[Adam Devine]

Dude, this guy is cool.

[Ders]

I actually like this guy. Yeah, I know, man.

[Adam Devine]

He's, like, dressing you down.

[Ders]

Yeah. I mean, maybe in his weird universe for sure. He goes in the restaurant, and then through the window, he's just enchiladas. He points at me as he walks.

[Adam Devine]

Okay, this guy is a craz. An absolute insane person.

[Ders]

Off the wall.

[Blake Anderson]

Was he. Did he look totally normal? And yeah, clothes is.

[Adam Devine]

What was he wearing?

[Ders]

He. He looked. He looked seemingly normal.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Ders]

But, like, look, I'm sure if I. If I got, like, anymore, I had five minutes to just look at this guy over. He. He appeared normal. He looked like our buddy Kevin. And so then Kevin pointing at me as he walks to the restaurant. And then he just goes out the front door. So doesn't eat at the restaurant.

[Adam Devine]

Oh, yeah.

[Ders]

And then walks past outside, past me, and, like, is pointing at me.

[Adam Devine]

I'm.

[Ders]

I'm ready. I'm, like, looking at my. Oh, I'm. I'm not to fight to defend my life. Fuck. I like him. I'm ready to fuck this Kevin Net look like I'm sizing up utensils on the table. I'm ready to just grab a fucking knife. I'm like, this dude was unbelievable vibes.

[Blake Anderson]

What's Kyle doing?

[Ders]

And the cool.

[Blake Anderson]

The cool thing of that story is the people working in the restaurant will be like, yeah, this guy was, like, pressing them about Epstein. And then Ders got so scared.

[Ders]

That's interesting.

[Blake Anderson]

That he grabbed a knife and stabbed them.

[Ders]

That's interesting.

[Adam Devine]

I wish he would have, man.

[Blake Anderson]

So maybe he's in the files.

[Ders]

And by the way, I was just like, I just don't want to talk about it with you. I'm trying to talk to my buddy.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, that's all you are going to talk to your buddy about, but not with this stranger.

[Ders]

That's all we want to clear our names.

[Blake Anderson]

That's all you want to talk about.

[Ders]

It's a necessity. But, dude, the right out of the gate, watching Kyle be out, Kyled. And he was like, I hope that guy doesn't know who we are, because all you guys talk about is how I eat babies and stuff.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah, no, Kyle's. Kyle is not about that life when it really. When push comes to shove, he's not about that life.

[Blake Anderson]

I know, but he's, what, fighting a man or.

[Adam Devine]

No, just like, truly going down the rabbit hole. I do think Kyle has common sense. I do think he is a normal human.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, sure.

[Adam Devine]

As soon as he is. Is presented with a true, like, wormhole dude. He cowers.

[Blake Anderson]

He cows.

[Ders]

Yeah.

[Adam Devine]

Which as we all should. As we all should.

[Ders]

But also just like a science experiment.

[Blake Anderson]

He all. He did go a little qanon during the pandemic. He did.

[Adam Devine]

Well, the pandemic was.

[Ders]

Well, he was technically. He was Q and A.

[Blake Anderson]

He is cute.

[Ders]

If we were. If you watch the documentary, it's the same guy.

[Adam Devine]

Yes, he looks exactly.

[Ders]

But dude, total just, like, psychological experiment where you're Like, I guess if you're this guy who has probably had something absolutely horrible happened to him that has made him the guy who goes up to strangers and just opens with that. I'm sure this is, like, the biggest thing that's ever happened to him because he's like, I told you, this is the thing.

[Public Investing Announcer]

Freaking.

[Blake Anderson]

See, you see, I also think L. A is a weird place, and L.

[Adam Devine]

A. L. A is a very weird place. You must remember that.

[Ders]

The weirdest.

[Blake Anderson]

And here's why. He maybe was a failed actor or a writer who is putting on a character and going out the way they do, the way they tell you to do.

[Ders]

Right.

[Blake Anderson]

In acting class, they're like, put the character on. You are this person for an afternoon and go test it out. And they would tell you that in improv class and an acting class to, like, be a different person, put on a different skin.

[Ders]

He's higher.

[Adam Devine]

Walk about.

[Blake Anderson]

And then this guy, weirdly, his different character is very much about the absence is. Is pressing people on their knowledge of the files.

[Adam Devine]

Miles Teller. Was it Miles Teller in. In character?

[Ders]

My. I mean, he gave me whiplash.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, hello.

[Adam Devine]

Hello.

[Blake Anderson]

Why? Because Miles is such a great actor? Is that what you're saying?

[Ders]

Yeah, he was in a movie called Whiplash. Yes, Points.

[Blake Anderson]

Well, I know. I know what you're.

[Ders]

No, but he has a top gun. He was. He was a real maverick. He was in this movie called. No, but was he Elvis?

[Blake Anderson]

I hope he lives for eternity. That's his newest movie. No one saw it.

[Ders]

Was he Elvis ever? He should have been.

[Blake Anderson]

He was not. No, no, no.

[Adam Devine]

Would have. Should have. Little monsters could have seen that.

[Ders]

Real monsters.

[Blake Anderson]

Ah, real monsters. That was before he was alive.

[Adam Devine]

Fred Savage. I think that might have been Fred Savage. Do you remember Little Monsters? Do you guys remember that movie?

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, yeah. That's the one with Howie Mandel, that they go under the bed.

[Adam Devine]

Yes, that one was truly frightening. The. The. The main bad guy, like, has the back side of his head, like, his brain exposed. That me up, dude.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, yeah, but you were a.

[Ders]

That was a movie you watched when you were sick, right?

[Adam Devine]

I. I'm. I'm always sick.

[Blake Anderson]

That was a. You're at home. You. You were sick. You get to. You get the clicker. Yeah, you get the power of the clicker. And then you stumble on, like, the daytime HBO that your parents would get once a year for a month, when they would give it to you for a month for free.

[Adam Devine]

A little sampler Pack.

[Blake Anderson]

Little sampler. And then all of a sudden, was it Little Monsters Is that what we're going with?

[Adam Devine]

Maybe it was Little monster.

[Blake Anderson]

Little monsters is what it's called. Little monsters.

[Ders]

I think it's little monsters. Little monsters, plural.

[Adam Devine]

The boy and the monster are.

[Blake Anderson]

Are monsters.

[Adam Devine]

Right. Isn't that the moral of the story?

[Ders]

Aren't we all. I mean, hey, is that we're all monsters?

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, and David Stern's in this movie, too.

[Adam Devine]

This.

[Blake Anderson]

This is a. A classic.

[Adam Devine]

Who's David Stern?

[Ders]

The NBA president.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, sorry. Daniel. Daniel Stern. Daniel Stern.

[Adam Devine]

Oh, what?

[Ders]

Daniel Stern is the dad.

[Blake Anderson]

Daniel Stern is the father in this movie. So if you don't know, this is a really cool, very weird 1989. So it's old, the makeup, and essentially this monster lives underneath the bed. He catches him in his room, he's like, yo, come with me. In the underneath world, he goes with him. I don't know, really remember the plot

[Ders]

because he's getting bullied in the real world. He's like, I'm sick and tired of the real world. I want to go where you're from.

[Adam Devine]

I think.

[Ders]

I don't know. I don't know.

[Adam Devine]

I think most 89 to 90s movies were about little boys getting bullied and how to overcome that.

[Ders]

Yeah, yeah. Karate.

[Blake Anderson]

And then in the by 90s, the kids figured out it's guns.

[Adam Devine]

Just shoot them.

[Blake Anderson]

Let's just shoot them. Don't. Don't even use your imagination.

[Ders]

And.

[Adam Devine]

And honestly, you want to see my little monster? Yeah.

[Blake Anderson]

Then. Then all of a sudden. Yeah, Then all of a sudden, it got a little real. Video games got too good is what happens. And it ruined the youth of America. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Adam Devine]

It was the first person shooters really up our. Our children. And it does suck. We used to get our aggression out with puppetry and makeup and imagination, but then that all stopped. And that is.

[Ders]

That all stops. But Howie Mandel, he was like a cool monster. He had, like, high tops on.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, he was right.

[Ders]

And like a cool jean vest.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Adam Devine]

A little earring. He had a little. Yeah, he was so cool, dude.

[Ders]

It was almost before. Was it before or after Aladdin? Because it reminds me of the same kind of thing.

[Adam Devine]

It was before Aladdin.

[Blake Anderson]

It was before Aladdin, but only a few years.

[Ders]

So do we think Aladdin ripped it off a blue guy who's really, like, fast and funny?

[Blake Anderson]

You know what? That was probably. This came out in 89, so they filmed it in 88, and then Aladdin came out in 92, which means they were working on it the previous four years or so. Yeah, I bet it was a. I Bet it was a green genie, right? Oh, yeah. Then all of a sudden, little monsters comes out and they go, oh.

[Adam Devine]

They're like, it's testing.

[Blake Anderson]

Well, let's get the eraser.

[Adam Devine]

Squish, Squish, Squish, Squish. Well, do you remember when, like, it used to be, like, movies, like, identical movies would come out at the same time just to confuse kids?

[Ders]

Dude, I remember. I remember.

[Adam Devine]

I think we may have talked about this.

[Blake Anderson]

Was it. It was like Wyatt Earp and Tombstone came out, like, within days.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah. And I feel like the movie theaters got sales just because people were like, I think I want to see that movie because that's the one they're talking about.

[Ders]

It's a which one y' all kick me situation.

[Adam Devine]

It was a very rush hour.

[Ders]

Which one of y' all flicked me?

[Adam Devine]

Exactly. Exactly.

[Blake Anderson]

Hung out with Chris Tucker the other night, by the way.

[Adam Devine]

Oh, he's in the Epstein files.

[Blake Anderson]

It's science.

[Ders]

Save it.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, I actually think.

[Ders]

No, I know that now.

[Adam Devine]

That I actually am willing to bring up. I don't. I wouldn't just open the pod being like, Epstein files, but, like, that is worthy of talking about.

[Ders]

But why not?

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, it's weird that you don't. Are you afraid? Are you really afraid they're going to release more fun?

[Ders]

It's not like we're random guys on the street who are coming up to you being like, did you hear the latest? We're your best friends who love and support you no matter what. Almost.

[Blake Anderson]

And we refuse to get in the same room.

[Adam Devine]

Okay. Why were you hanging out with. With.

[Blake Anderson]

I wasn't hanging out. I wasn't hanging out.

[Ders]

Chris Tucker.

[Blake Anderson]

I wasn't hanging out, but I was at the NBA All Star Slam dunk competition.

[Adam Devine]

There we go. Get them.

[Ders]

Boy, that must have been the whole damn list.

[Adam Devine]

That deserves a. That's cool. That's cool. You got to see all those players that nobody knows their names do slam dunks.

[Blake Anderson]

Dude, what was that even about? The three? What sucked is the three point contest was way more interesting and fun.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah, Jackson.

[Ders]

Was Jackson Hayes in the slam dunk contest?

[Adam Devine]

Yeah. Who? Shout out Jackson Hayes. We did with Jackson. He's the man.

[Ders]

What a freak athlete.

[Adam Devine]

I know he's a fan of the show because one time I went to a Laker game and he geeked out on me and I was like, oh, this is the homie right here, Jackson Hayes. Shout out. I would love him on the warriors as well. He's a very good player. Young talent.

[Ders]

Okay. I don't know if what do they call that?

[Blake Anderson]

Okay, so the. The looks like Kishad Johnson, he came out with E40.

[Adam Devine]

Yes.

[Blake Anderson]

And they were fucking throwing it down. E40 was also sitting by me. Yeah, you're so lucky. Yeah, dude, it was pretty sick. And then Carter Bryant, he's a Spurs. Like none of these guys. And no offense, no offense. These guys are not the stars of the league. And that's what we want to see. We want to see the stars. Or at least. And maybe I'll bite my tongue in a few years when these guys become the big stars. But. But when. When Blake Griffin, he did it as a rookie and he won as a rookie.

[Ders]

Star.

[Blake Anderson]

But you knew he was going to be a star. Yes, he already was a star. Wasn't like, he was already was a star.

[Ders]

And this is how maybe Lob said he wasn't a thing yet, but he was like jumping out the gym.

[Blake Anderson]

Yes.

[Adam Devine]

He was acting like it was an and one mixtape. It was dope.

[Blake Anderson]

Like some of these dunks, you're like, I mean, I couldn't do any of this. But you're like, but if you.

[Ders]

But if you had a week, if you had a week to try, I.

[Blake Anderson]

I also, I don't know if you saw I was kicking with my boy Mugsy Bugs, saw that I tower over and I've never felt better about something.

[Ders]

Yeah, you did this to him. The too short sign. Yeah, he was like, we just hopped

[Blake Anderson]

over top of me. No, but Mugsy Bogue slam dong competition. Yeah. Dwarfed what any of these guys did.

[Adam Devine]

Literally dwarfed. Literally. Good work.

[Ders]

Stop it. Don't.

[Adam Devine]

Good word.

[Blake Anderson]

But yeah, it was. It was a bit of a disappointment that there were bigger stars.

[Ders]

Did you see who. I can't remember who had the take, but it was essentially. Or maybe it's like a. Out there in the ether. Take the NBA all star situation. The whole game, the whole weekend changed when Kobe stepped to LeBron and was like, let's go one on one. This is why we're here. Like, we get to do this. And there's no like game on the line. It's just us. And LeBron was like. And passed it. Just dished it off because he was like, what?

[Blake Anderson]

Why?

[Ders]

Why would we take this seriously? But dude. And then from there it's become kind of like, well, and I'm not saying LeBron couldn't have won the dunk contest. Sure, he very much could have, but what if he didn't? And what are those optics?

[Blake Anderson]

And it's like, see the bitch maintenance.

[Ders]

You just you actually have to win. You have to sign up for it because you're the face and you're. You're arguably more athletic than Jordan was. As. At your size. You have to. You have to win the dunk contest because you're LeBron.

[Blake Anderson]

Yes.

[Adam Devine]

Well, I think it's the whole argument of maybe, like, As a person, LeBron doesn't want to fail publicly. Like, so is that. I don't know.

[Ders]

Like, he's always. He puts his hand up to the camera when he's playing basketball.

[Adam Devine]

He's like, so what if everybody approached life like that? Like, I. I would rather not fail publicly. I would rather not do it. Like, you have to. Like, it's okay to fail.

[Ders]

Too late. Too late.

[Blake Anderson]

Like, it's too late. What?

[Adam Devine]

What?

[Ders]

You failed.

[Blake Anderson]

No, that's what I'm saying. That's the maintenance of LeBron and why he eyes. He'll never be the greatest.

[Ders]

Yeah. Is that one long word?

[Adam Devine]

Yeah. Madness is.

[Blake Anderson]

You have to be able to step up in those moments and dominate. Not all and. And do dominate.

[Adam Devine]

Okay, but.

[Blake Anderson]

Because you are the best.

[Adam Devine]

Okay, but, like, okay, remember that guy?

[Blake Anderson]

And if you don't beat Kobe, then he's Kobe, and you were. You were a young kid, and then you. Your own lady.

[Adam Devine]

Remember that guy at the dunk contest who, like, hit the side of the backboard and, like, fell on his back? What if that was LeBron? So would that.

[Ders]

I guess my point is you. You just don't be that guy.

[Adam Devine]

Well, you never know. That's. That's. That.

[Ders]

That's what. But no, you do know that's what made Jordan. Jordan.

[Adam Devine]

Is that, like, even if that would never happen?

[Ders]

Kind of. Kind of.

[Adam Devine]

Right, right, right.

[Blake Anderson]

But even if it did happen, he would get up and jump from the free throw line and. And look cool when he did it.

[Ders]

Exactly. Something, Adam. 100% something. Or he'd come back and go. He'd go to the camera, and he'd look into the barrel of the camera to the universe, and he would say, that will never, ever happen again. And then. And then, guess what? It wouldn't.

[Adam Devine]

I think. I think you guys are speaking as old heads, bro. Like, Jordan didn't have social media, like, breathing down his throat. He. I don't. I don't think if he knew stuff would get out that quick that he would have done it.

[Ders]

Are you out of your mind?

[Blake Anderson]

Yes.

[Adam Devine]

No, I don't.

[Ders]

Blake, are you out of your mind? Social media is smaller than Michael Jordan. Oh, hello, Michael Jordan. If you go anywhere in the world Michael Jordan hasn't played basketball forever, but that's because I'm from Chicago. They still say Michael Jordan, but he's

[Adam Devine]

from a different time when we used to uplift people so high that the whole world cared. Michael Jordan, Michael Jackson. Like, these were people that the whole world cared.

[Ders]

I feel like Michael Jordan. Jackson didn't get lifted up. Up forever.

[Adam Devine]

He did. He did. Michael Jackson was the biggest star in the whole entire world.

[Ders]

I don't disagree.

[Adam Devine]

People don't. We don't uplift people that like that anymore. We would rather see them broken down.

[Blake Anderson]

Yes. Yes. So that makes. That makes me go even more so. Be that guy.

[Adam Devine]

Defy the.

[Blake Anderson]

That guy that steps up in the moment and isn't afraid. Who cares?

[Adam Devine]

Dude, I like that.

[Blake Anderson]

Get embarrassed.

[Adam Devine]

I like that.

[Blake Anderson]

Get embarrassed. Fall down. If you, you, by the way, if you do land on your head and slam dunk contest, you're LeBron James. You get up, you rub it off, you try it again, and hopefully you pull off something cool. I'm like, I would rather see them try and fail than not try at all. I think it's so made to be so worried about your legacy or whatever.

[Adam Devine]

But. So you're saying you're like team Jake Paul, where you like, get in a ring and get your. Your jaw broke in half. Half, and you, you just get smoked live.

[Blake Anderson]

I mean, sure, but I, but like, I'm not talking. It's not.

[Adam Devine]

That's the mental you're talking about.

[Blake Anderson]

No, no, but that's apples and oranges. Because he shouldn't have been fighting a ex world champion. Jake Paul should have, because he was asking.

[Ders]

Arguably.

[Blake Anderson]

Arguably. And they said it was a pretty good fight, but.

[Adam Devine]

Right. He's the best.

[Blake Anderson]

LeBron James should have been dunking a basketball in the All Star game.

[Adam Devine]

Okay.

[Blake Anderson]

Or the, the slam dunk contest.

[Ders]

The classic line is like, it' getting knocked down. It's about getting back up.

[Adam Devine]

Oh, very chumba.

[Ders]

And look. And look.

[Adam Devine]

Whoa.

[Ders]

We. We've watched. We've watched sports stars our entire lives have, like, massive fails. Right?

[Adam Devine]

Sure.

[Ders]

But it's the. It's the one. It's the ones who come back and do something greater that you're almost no longer like. Oh, yeah, they're known for that thing. It's like you forget about the thing. I'm sure Tom Brady has some whack ass just fumble bumble. What the. Like, whatever. But he. He outdid that.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah. When it's like, son, kiss him on the mouth. That was weird.

[Blake Anderson]

That was a fumble bumble.

[Adam Devine]

Champ kind of fumble bumble.

[Ders]

Was that. Is that a fumble bumble to you?

[Adam Devine]

I don't know, bro. It was a weird kid.

[Ders]

But, you know, I'm saying, like, Jordan's missed shots, but then he made more.

[Blake Anderson]

He.

[Ders]

He worked hard to not miss the shots.

[Blake Anderson]

But we are defending Jordan a lot. And I don't know if you guys just saw the video of Jordan, like, grabbing the little boy's butt a lot.

[Adam Devine]

No, don't spread that. Don't spread that. It was.

[Ders]

It was already.

[Adam Devine]

No, it was already debunked, dude.

[Blake Anderson]

How was it debunked? It was an AI video.

[Adam Devine]

Tebow called me with this. He's like, yo, Jordan's, like, grabbing butts out here. It's not really. There was ice down this little kid's pants and he's getting it out of his pants. It's not. It's nothing to talk about.

[Ders]

Life hack. That's a life hack, by the way.

[Blake Anderson]

Let me give that eyes a child. I didn't think he was a child predator.

[Adam Devine]

Absolutely is not.

[Ders]

Not.

[Adam Devine]

He absolutely is not.

[Blake Anderson]

Yes, that's what I'm saying. I'm just saying it's funny we're defending Jordan so much when Jordan just said some. Where the video is him, like, pinching a boy's butt.

[Adam Devine]

It's. No, it's already. No, it's already debunked.

[Ders]

No, but we can defend aspects. We could defend aspects of anybody. You could defend some aspects, but then maybe.

[Blake Anderson]

Maybe that guy, Jeffrey Epstein. Go for it.

[Ders]

Hey, Jeffrey Epstein. Horrible guy.

[Adam Devine]

Rapist. Stop. Stop. The worst Satan.

[Ders]

Probably one of the best. One of the best mental manipulators of this time.

[Blake Anderson]

Legendary. Legendary mate. Dude, he's so good at blackmail.

[Ders]

He has a power. Used it for evil, Right? He used it for evil.

[Adam Devine]

That's an evil power. Blackmail is an evil power. You can't make that.

[Ders]

That's not. I didn't say. I'm saying like. I'm saying.

[Blake Anderson]

We didn't say it had to be a good power.

[Ders]

Getting people to do things.

[Adam Devine]

He's a super villain.

[Ders]

Getting people to do things is a superpower power. Steve Jobs got people to make phones this thin, right?

[Adam Devine]

Sure.

[Ders]

Jeffrey Epstein. I'm not even gonna re you. Hey, did you read the newest. Latest files?

[Adam Devine]

I don't know, man. No, I'm out. I just.

[Ders]

He went for evil. He went for evil.

[Adam Devine]

Done with that guy.

[Blake Anderson]

I don't know.

[Ders]

So what I'm saying is, if Jordan's getting ice out of this butt or not, he's still being.

[Blake Anderson]

It's not being done with that guy. That guy's dead. It's about the world needs to be

[Adam Devine]

done with that guy. We need to eradicate him from the history books. How?

[Ders]

How? Wouldn't that be nice for you to just move on?

[Blake Anderson]

He's dead. He's. He's eradicated. He's been eradicated.

[Adam Devine]

What was the. What was your word you use for LeBron? Acidness. Acidness. Out of here, dude. Yeah, I'm done with that. He did. I'm not gonna uplift him in any way.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm done.

[Ders]

As far as we know, he asked himself out.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm just saying he's really good at blackmail and being a super villain.

[Ders]

Yeah, he's got six rings for sure. Yeah, he's got six rings.

[Adam Devine]

Okay, fair enough.

[Ders]

Traffic trafficking rings. Doesn't that what they call them? A traffic ring?

[Blake Anderson]

Six.

[Ders]

Yeah, six rings. That's not even. Don't. And don't even give me points for that. Don't want them.

[Blake Anderson]

Don't quote him on that. Do not quote him on that.

[Ders]

By the way, this is the kind of conversation where, like, there's the comedians who go, like, yeah, anything can be funny.

[Adam Devine]

I don't care.

[Ders]

Nothing's off limits. There's nothing that's taboo.

[Adam Devine]

Ah, man, I love how cutting edge we are, dude.

[Ders]

Cuz I don't think this is that. Actually, this is.

[Adam Devine]

But at least we tried. At least we tried. At least we. This is our dunk contest. We came out here and we tried to dunk it.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, we all fell in our. On our head. See?

[Ders]

And if we don't say anything funnier than what. What just transpired, we're done.

[Blake Anderson]

We're done.

[Ders]

Netflix. Netflix. Thanks for having us. Can you do that?

[Blake Anderson]

All I'm saying is Blake's word. He's in the files.

[Adam Devine]

I definitely am not. I'm not. How high caliber?

[Ders]

Like, let me get the ice out of your butt. Hey. This message is brought to you by

[Adam Devine]

Pizza Hut, my brothers.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, what's up?

[Adam Devine]

Have you heard about Pizza Hut? Hut's big New Yorker?

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Adam Devine]

Well, let me tell you, it's Pizza Hut's biggest pizza. Massive slices, so big you have to fold them for just $10. Do the math. It's a big deal.

[Blake Anderson]

Look, there's always that one friend who says they're not hungry, and then they eat three slices. Who is that guy on this podcast Name names? Blake. Is it Anders?

[Adam Devine]

I don't know.

[Blake Anderson]

I don't.

[Adam Devine]

I don't know what you're talking about. It is you well, I can take down six XL slices of the Big and that's easy for me. How many bites do you think it would be? 5?

[Blake Anderson]

10? Hey Blake, only one way to find out. Let's get one right now.

[Ders]

Not mad at that. The $10 big New Yorker is a big deal. You just can't argue with the math. Get the Big New Yorker from pizza hut for $10 for a limited time.

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[Adam Devine]

Wait, why did you. Oh, that's why you were with Chris Tucker. Okay, I'm remembering.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, the slam dunk contest. Yeah. Chris Tucker. His. He makes me. I was like. I look at Chloe and I'm like, should I start wearing, like, sparkly jackets? Like, his. His jacket game was so. So on point. Like, his jacket had. You couldn't help but notice that he was in the. The arena.

[Adam Devine]

I think NBA all star weekend is the, like, the place to debut your

[Ders]

awesome jacket to show out your jacket.

[Blake Anderson]

I wasn't showing out enough.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah. Like, what did you wear, bud?

[Blake Anderson]

Just a. Just a jacket. Just a regular jacket.

[Adam Devine]

Were you courtside? Were you close? You got it. Why aren't you.

[Blake Anderson]

I was, dude. I was courtside. Yeah. I don't have any sparkly jackets.

[Adam Devine]

You gotta get. Not for the.

[Ders]

It's not too late, Adam, for you to get like. And Blake helped me out here. Was it Jerry Lawler who dressed like a king or whatever?

[Adam Devine]

Yes, absolutely.

[Ders]

Jerry the King Lawler.

[Adam Devine]

Yes. Great pool.

[Ders]

It's not. It's not too late for you to just wear your clothes and the, like, cape or whatever we call that, and the crown.

[Blake Anderson]

I get dressed like the candy. Candy crush king. Is that what you're saying?

[Adam Devine]

Yes. Why?

[Blake Anderson]

Not possible.

[Ders]

Just saying.

[Blake Anderson]

Not too late.

[Adam Devine]

Just saying that seems kind of cool.

[Ders]

Anything's possible. That. Hey, that's showing out.

[Adam Devine]

That's really showing out. Out.

[Blake Anderson]

But the. The bummer was is they. They asked me. They're like, do you want. They didn't give me both. They're like, do you want tickets to the slam dunk contest or the actual game? And it was Bo's birthday. Big number two for big Bo. He on Sunday. So I couldn't go to that. And so I was like, we'll go to the slam dunk contest.

[Ders]

But then someone dunked him.

[Blake Anderson]

The actual game was pretty cool. Women. Yama showed the out. Kawhi had, like, a legendary performance.

[Ders]

This is great.

[Blake Anderson]

And Obama was sitting there courtside. I could have been sat next to Obama.

[Ders]

Adam Devine, did I get your vote?

[Blake Anderson]

I'm pissed now.

[Ders]

You voted for me, right?

[Blake Anderson]

I would have been sad. So far away from the actual people. They're taking photographs.

[Ders]

Let me get some. My side of your butt crack. Yeah, it's all good. It's all good.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah. I wonder how close you could have been sat next to Obama.

[Blake Anderson]

Well, they would have given me court. Courtside seats.

[Adam Devine]

Well, because you and. You and Biden Are ex homies so X.

[Blake Anderson]

Hey, dude, I did. I did the video.

[Ders]

Is he dead?

[Adam Devine]

I don't know if Biden's still.

[Ders]

Did he die?

[Adam Devine]

I don't know if Biden's still with. With Adam the same way. Why wouldn't he?

[Blake Anderson]

Why wouldn't he?

[Ders]

Yeah. I don't understand what's happening.

[Blake Anderson]

What did I do?

[Adam Devine]

FaceTime him? FaceTime him right now.

[Blake Anderson]

I would love to, but

[Ders]

can you imagine that dude on a crazy FaceTime? You're like, Ah, poor guy.

[Adam Devine]

We're.

[Ders]

You're. You know what? You're going to the bathroom. You can just. We can do this later. Huh? Sack. Sack cam.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah. When I did that video, my. My dad. I think I told you guys this. I was like, my dad voted for you in Barack. You mind if I give him a call? He's a fan. And he's like, oh, sure. And then for Biden, and then I call, and my dad, I go, dad, I have someone that wants to speak with you. And he's like, Mr. Divine, this is vice president. He was vice president at the time, Joe Biden. I just want to say, you know, you're. I'm working with your son. He's a really funny guy. My dad hung up on him.

[Ders]

Yeah, goodbye.

[Adam Devine]

And.

[Blake Anderson]

And then I like your policies. He hung up on me.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah.

[Blake Anderson]

And then I was like, what? And then the Secret Service comes. They're like, we got to take your father away right now or we got to take Biden away right now. I'm like, can I call him back? And he's like, I'm sorry. They're taking me, and they take him. And I call my dad back. I'm like, what's that about? He goes, nah, you're not gonna get me with that. And I'm like, what? And he's like, yeah, yeah. Like, that's Joe Biden. And I'm like, it is. And he. And I was like, why would you think it wasn't? And he was like, well, I just thought it's one of your Hollywood friends doing an impression.

[Adam Devine]

There's Adam, right?

[Ders]

And I'm like, fair enough.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, for sure. But I'm like, you knew that I was going to the White House to do this video today.

[Ders]

Hollywood friend.

[Blake Anderson]

No, you.

[Ders]

You knew it.

[Blake Anderson]

Nope. And then he was like, no.

[Ders]

Oh, you wish. Yeah, I. I. You know, whenever I hear those stories on talk shows where they're like. They're actors, and they're like, so Spike Lee called me, and I hung up on him because I was like, there's no way Spike Lee is calling me. I'm like, aren't you like, like an actress? Like.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ders]

Don't you get calls from people? I never understood those stories.

[Adam Devine]

I get spam calls. That's it. Nobody calls me.

[Blake Anderson]

Spike Lee never. Never called you?

[Adam Devine]

No.

[Blake Anderson]

It's weird you mentioned Spike Lee because that was the one number way back in the day that somehow Kyle got Spike Lee's number. Sure. And we were very stoned. Remember when we had that fire pit illegally in our back in our backyard and we would just burn. We would just burn like broken furniture in it. It and would just basically be getting high from the fumes. Cast away the lacquer and we. Yeah. And then we called Spike Lee, got his number and. And like would prank call him and it was just a fun thing for us to do. I'm sorry, Spike, I didn't. I didn't know.

[Adam Devine]

You really think that was Spike? It must. How did Kyle get that number?

[Ders]

Oh, this is a rever. A reverse.

[Blake Anderson]

I don't know.

[Adam Devine]

Know.

[Blake Anderson]

I don't know.

[Adam Devine]

I'm just wondering. I know he was a teacher at the LA film school, but I'm like, how did he come upon that?

[Ders]

Who Spike was?

[Blake Anderson]

No, Kyle.

[Adam Devine]

Maybe there was a way I was like, doesn't that.

[Blake Anderson]

I forget exactly how. It was like a friend. It was like friend, friend passed down. Yes, I liked.

[Adam Devine]

I think there's a. Just a lot of like voicemails that Spike Lee has saved of us being like, dude, we're sitting next to the bonfire right now. Dude, dude, dude, dude. The right thing was so good, dude. He got game. Was so good, dude.

[Ders]

We're lighting it on fire like the pizza place, dude. What's it called?

[Adam Devine]

This is in honor. This is an honor of you. Dude.

[Ders]

We got a boombox. This was for radio, right?

[Adam Devine]

We're kind of doing the tight thing right now, dude, by like freaking partying and drinking beer. Can we do the tight thing?

[Blake Anderson]

Did you guys ever prank anyone?

[Adam Devine]

Well, yes, I remember I. I spoke about it with the Blaine Andy. So. Yeah. But I got. I got in trouble for that.

[Ders]

Oh, okay. Yeah. And if you're listening or watching, go ahead and find that episode somewhere.

[Blake Anderson]

That memorable story.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah, no, that's a. No, that's a very iconic episode. You guys gotta dig in the crates for that.

[Blake Anderson]

Which one?

[Ders]

But what.

[Blake Anderson]

I don't remember this story even a little bit.

[Ders]

If they don't blaze, maybe tell it one more time.

[Adam Devine]

I don't want to. I don't even want to. I don't really want to.

[Blake Anderson]

Okay, dude. And this is. This is exactly what improv teaches you. You just sort of throw the E brake on the conversation.

[Ders]

Yeah. Big on. No, never.

[Blake Anderson]

No, never. No, I'm good.

[Ders]

I did. That wasn't really my thing, but I did have a homie who. This isn't even really. Prank phone call, but it was almost funnier. He would call the, like, phone. Cell phone company. Cell phones are brand new at this time. Right.

[Adam Devine]

So, like, Nokia.

[Ders]

There's like a certain, like, minutes situation.

[Blake Anderson]

Right.

[Ders]

There's like, a minute situation. If you go over.

[Adam Devine]

He would.

[Ders]

He would call.

[Blake Anderson]

Sure.

[Ders]

Every month and, like, beg not to be charged. And then he'd be like, you know what? Fuck it. I'm gonna cancel my whole thing. Cancel it right now. And then they'd get like. Because if you cancel, then you're losing money down the line. Right.

[Adam Devine]

Sure.

[Ders]

And just listening to the. Him negotiate with his people and, like, get real personal. Like, come on, put yourself in my shoes. Like, we were out party. I was really drunk. I'm trying to hook up with this girl. I was calling her, and they're like, sir, I.

[Blake Anderson]

Look.

[Ders]

I don't. He's like, come on, be human. And, like, very funny to just hear these people cave and be like, okay, we can delete that charge from your.

[Blake Anderson]

All right.

[Ders]

And can I get, like, a bonus month? And you're, like, going for it.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah. Come on, dude. I love her. Can I get a bonus month if I don't call her?

[Ders]

Please let me get that bonus.

[Adam Devine]

If I don't call her, she's going to. He's gonna break up with me.

[Ders]

All right, fuck it. Cancel it.

[Blake Anderson]

Now, Blake, this artwork over your shoulder there now, is that. You put that on an altar when you sacrifice children in the Epstein files, or what's the deal there?

[Adam Devine]

Oh, come on now. I told you, this is a place where I can have any sort of sponsor. This is a sponsorship, basically. Patio.

[Ders]

Is that a shelf?

[Blake Anderson]

It's a sponsorship patio. Okay, okay. But then. But then also maybe you. Is that the skulls of children or what? What is the deal there?

[Ders]

Children. Very tiny, very small.

[Adam Devine]

This is. This is my buddy, Neck Face. It's a. It's a lamp. You could put a. You could put a little bulb in here.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, light bulb.

[Ders]

Oh, you can insert from the bottom. Got it.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah. It's going to be great for Halloween, but it's also good for the podcast, so. But if. You know, if. If there's.

[Blake Anderson]

I was just wondering why you're so, so kind of nervous about the FC files. And then I look over your shoulder and kind of notice that.

[Adam Devine]

Not nervous, it looks like.

[Ders]

Yes, sir. Yo, wait, is that a music stand that. That's on?

[Adam Devine]

Yeah, it is. It is, actually. Well, no.

[Blake Anderson]

Look at you having a music stand.

[Adam Devine]

I think I got this for, like, to put a projector on, but I never. I never set it up. Yeah, I never set it up.

[Blake Anderson]

Classic. Classic.

[Adam Devine]

Blake, what were those things? What are the. What are the. The music stands called? I think they had a really cool name, actually.

[Ders]

All right, let's just take a moment to let you remember that.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, it's called the music Stands. So the episode. If people. If you want to hear what Blake Anderson was. Blaine. Blaine. Andyo. Whatever this story was, he refuses to tell it again. It was in episode 72, Truck Stops, where fun starts. Episode 72 of this is Important. Perfect. So apparently it was a classic. Yeah, I. I don't remember that.

[Adam Devine]

Go back, check it out. Check it out. I mean, that was a long time ago. What are we on now?

[Ders]

I might go listen right now.

[Adam Devine]

What are we on right now? What episode is it?

[Ders]

2000?

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Adam Devine]

Damn.

[Blake Anderson]

This is episode 288. So over 200 episodes ago, and you refuse to tell the story.

[Adam Devine]

Story.

[Blake Anderson]

So.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah, I kind of don't remember that.

[Ders]

Well, why don't you just say you to our new listeners?

[Adam Devine]

Absolutely.

[Ders]

Just go ahead and.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, we're on Netflix now.

[Adam Devine]

If you're not. If you're not day one. We're not really.

[Ders]

And that's a cool attitude on this. That's a great. No new friends.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, I get it.

[Ders]

I got it. I know it's good.

[Blake Anderson]

I think that is Blake's. Blake's attitude.

[Adam Devine]

I'm very Drake in that way. I'm very drinking that way.

[Ders]

Yeah.

[Blake Anderson]

Except for you're not as big as Drake. So. So Drake's whole thing is he have. He's so huge that he doesn't want any new friends.

[Ders]

What are we talking about here now?

[Adam Devine]

Drake. We're talking Drake.

[Ders]

He's not as big as Drake. He's so huge. What are we talking about now here?

[Adam Devine]

I'm gonna come.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, Blake's penis.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah. Yeah. What?

[Blake Anderson]

I'm always talking about Blake's penis.

[Ders]

Blake. Drake. There's something happening there.

[Adam Devine]

Blake and Drake.

[Blake Anderson]

Something.

[Adam Devine]

Maybe Blake and Drake.

[Ders]

Dude, that's the spin off. Get your own podcast with that guy. You don't need us. Me and Adam will yell at each other.

[Adam Devine]

Drake and Josh. But it's like Blake and Josh. That could be kind of sick.

[Ders]

No, Blake It's Blake and Drake.

[Adam Devine]

Okay, fair enough.

[Blake Anderson]

Dude, I'm in my new office. There's weird haunted noises happening at my house.

[Adam Devine]

What do you mean?

[Blake Anderson]

Okay, I'm in my new office. Okay. And it's a new. New house. A totally new place. Yeah, there's pounding and, like, noises happen.

[Ders]

Epstein.

[Adam Devine]

It is a bit echoey. It sounds like a church almost.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, well, there's no furniture or anything in it. Blake was just here for. For Bo's birthday. Yeah, Anders, he told me he couldn't make it, and I.

[Adam Devine]

Fair enough.

[Blake Anderson]

I respect him. I respect him for it.

[Ders]

I said I could and then I said I couldn't, and.

[Blake Anderson]

But I'm choosing not to. And choosing not to is what he said. And that. That was awesome. Thanks for coming. We had a great time. A lot of kids.

[Adam Devine]

A lot of kids. You know what? I'm. I'm hyped.

[Blake Anderson]

They collect them. At about 2, they start to collect little friends.

[Adam Devine]

Don't say collecting kids.

[Ders]

Yeah. And Blake collects little skulls. Yeah, it's just like that. Don't start.

[Blake Anderson]

Well, it's weird that you're so scared to talk about it with that shrine behind you.

[Adam Devine]

Don't say collecting kids. That's weird.

[Blake Anderson]

No, I mean, he collects little friends. He has like. Because he goes to like a little gymnastics crew, so he's got friends from there. He has friends in his little swimming class.

[Ders]

Adam, I know this. Your new dad is making. Making friends. It's making friends.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah. You don't collect.

[Blake Anderson]

You collect. You gotta collect them. But then now it's weird. They're all two. So then you have like 15, 22 year olds running around your party, and it's absolute chaos.

[Ders]

Insane.

[Blake Anderson]

And it's also. I live on the beach, right? So there's just a open body of water there. So it's just parents playing goalie against the ocean.

[Adam Devine]

It's potentially deadly. Yeah. You have to be on full alert.

[Ders]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Adam Devine]

But I'm. I'm hyped that I got to it because you're. You guys send out the rsvp and it was on like. What is it?

[Blake Anderson]

Particle.

[Adam Devine]

What is that? The app.

[Ders]

There's so many. Why?

[Adam Devine]

Why not? Just. I. I'm so glad that it worked out for me, but that is extremely hard for me to figure out. The partiful app.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, do we think it's. You're an idiot.

[Adam Devine]

Oh, did you? Why not? Just.

[Ders]

I'm the same.

[Adam Devine]

Why?

[Blake Anderson]

Dude, it's so easy.

[Adam Devine]

Why can't I just text like, I'm coming? Well, you Could.

[Blake Anderson]

But you didn't. You could have done that.

[Adam Devine]

I told you. Well, I told you at the Super Bowl, I'm coming this.

[Blake Anderson]

You saw me.

[Adam Devine]

But then you're like, well, you have an rsvp the particle at like that. That's like, why do we have to do everything through our phones? I. I just.

[Blake Anderson]

It's so my wife can see the head account. It's for the wives. You think I care about Parthal? I don't care about part. I don't work for Parthal.

[Ders]

I don't couldn't give a about after this pod.

[Adam Devine]

You seem like you're very pro partiful, dude.

[Ders]

It is weird.

[Blake Anderson]

Well, no, dude, it's so the wives know the head count and so they don't have to go through.

[Ders]

And you want to use Partle for anything.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, I have used it. It's very easy. You just click, I'm coming. Or yes, no, maybe I don't like, like it.

[Adam Devine]

I'm not a big partal guy. I find it to be very hard to navigate.

[Blake Anderson]

All I'm saying is this episode is brought to you by part.

[Ders]

I got a question about particle. I got an invite, literally today, a particle invite from a person from like 2010 that I'm like, is it just because I'm in your phone still that, like, you sent me this? We haven't spoken enough in 15 years. We were like acquaintances. How am I getting this now? What is happening?

[Blake Anderson]

Was it for like a something you for sure wouldn't go to something, like a little housewarming party or something that you're like, I don't know this person.

[Adam Devine]

A baptism?

[Ders]

Yeah. This is a person I. I knew for 10 seconds who's like, run it back. Run it back.

[Adam Devine]

Allegedly.

[Ders]

Run it back.

[Blake Anderson]

Well, no, the question is, is it like, hey, I'm doing a show and I want you to come check me

[Adam Devine]

out, or is it like, I'm getting

[Blake Anderson]

married and I could see him just trying to. Throwing out as many.

[Ders]

Not clicking on it. Not clicking on it.

[Adam Devine]

Oh, you don't even know what it is.

[Blake Anderson]

You don't even know. You don't even know what it's about.

[Ders]

No.

[Blake Anderson]

Okay, well, you know, you can click on it and they can't tell that you've clicked. It's like you have to respond, yes.

[Adam Devine]

I don't know that, actually. I don't know the rules of particle.

[Ders]

I'm not scared. Okay, well, that's just the rules. I'm not scared to click on it.

[Adam Devine]

I have seems like a really scary.

[Ders]

I have zero Interest in clicking on it.

[Adam Devine]

It.

[Ders]

Regardless.

[Blake Anderson]

You're scared of clicking on it. Blake is scared of the Epstein files, and you're both scared as.

[Adam Devine]

I'm just. I'm just confused where the particle came from. I'm. I'm a little. I'm a little shocked.

[Ders]

I am too. Because AO and ATA also sent one to us and I was like, so everyone's doing this.

[Adam Devine]

My New Year's invitations, my Christmas parties, birthday parties. Everything is part of Full. I don't want it anymore. Everything is part of Full. You have to sign up. You have to get a code. It's like you don't know who's coming until you say yes. Like, I don't want to say yes till I know who's there. Like, what. What if it's just a bunch of. What's a bunch of wackadoodles that I

[Ders]

don't have a problem with? I. I don't make my decisions based on other people. That's stupid.

[Blake Anderson]

That's just weird.

[Adam Devine]

No, that's just weird. Why?

[Ders]

Maybe, hey, maybe I'm an old head.

[Blake Anderson]

That's. That's you not wanting to do. That's you not wanting to do the slam dunk contest.

[Ders]

That's what that is.

[Adam Devine]

No, it's not acidness. It is not bishad. It's like people should just know what they're signing up for.

[Ders]

Oh, I want my. I have my comfort. You know what? I'm signing up for my life. And where I go, I go, who's there? I don't know. We'll find out.

[Blake Anderson]

I don't know. And you'll know when you get there.

[Adam Devine]

It just seems. It just seems odd to me, the partifulness of the party. I don't. It's. It's feeling very.

[Ders]

I agree that it came out of nowhere and is suddenly the one. I'm like, I can't just get an.

[Adam Devine]

What.

[Blake Anderson]

What were the others? Evite. What were the Evite. Evite. Evite class. Well, there had to.

[Adam Devine]

What happened to Evite?

[Ders]

It's just old now.

[Adam Devine]

Bring back Evite.

[Blake Anderson]

I respect the. The entrepreneurs who saw a hole in the market.

[Adam Devine]

What was the hole?

[Ders]

Bend over and I'll show you the

[Blake Anderson]

long toothedness of Evite. Of the Evite. And saw the long toothedness.

[Ders]

I get it. They basically go like, okay, Starbucks is hella old. What's a new fucking coffee? Like, they just look for the old thing and swoop in and go, this is going to be what Starbucks was in 1990 for now.

[Public Investing Announcer]

And we're going to start.

[Ders]

What is part of the third place?

[Blake Anderson]

It's a third place.

[Ders]

Like, as if Whole Foods wasn't expensive enough, Erewhon was like, hold my groceries.

[Adam Devine]

Who is ok. Who is what is partiful doing that Evite wasn't doing. Why is.

[Blake Anderson]

I don't know.

[Adam Devine]

It seems way harder. It seems way more.

[Blake Anderson]

It's like.

[Adam Devine]

It's like party Cops, dude.

[Blake Anderson]

And see, see, this is the energy. This is the energy that, that Anders and I want from you for every topic. You're. You're blas. Of every topic. When we ask you to tell a story that you've told before that we're like, oh, yeah, remind us of that

[Adam Devine]

and go to F72.

[Blake Anderson]

You refuse to do it.

[Adam Devine]

It. I'm talking.

[Blake Anderson]

You never take. You never take a stance on anything we like. Maybe you take a stance. You don't even take a stance on the Epstein files because you're afraid of something.

[Adam Devine]

Cuz you're afraid taking a stance on an EP file. I don't want to hear it anymore. It's evil. It's terrible. The guy.

[Blake Anderson]

Yes. Don't we think it should all come out so we can then arrest all the evil?

[Adam Devine]

They are out.

[Blake Anderson]

No, they're not.

[Ders]

They all.

[Blake Anderson]

You dumb.

[Ders]

They're redacted. And yeah, Adam.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm pissed now.

[Ders]

Adam's combed him, right?

[Blake Anderson]

I'm pissed now.

[Ders]

Adam's combed him, groomed him.

[Adam Devine]

Comb the hell out. Everybody is bad. Everybody is bad, dude.

[Ders]

Listen.

[Adam Devine]

Yes.

[Blake Anderson]

Everybody's bad.

[Ders]

What?

[Blake Anderson]

No. By. How about we stick to particle?

[Ders]

Okay, you're free. One's bad.

[Blake Anderson]

That.

[Ders]

Are you about to go, like, philosophical? Like.

[Blake Anderson]

Yes, I think he was. And then he backed off.

[Ders]

Are sharks, Are sharks evil if they eat people or are they just hungry?

[Adam Devine]

No, I mean, like, what, what, what stance are you guys asking me to take right now? Do you really want to really dice files and get really real about the Epstein files?

[Ders]

I don't listening. Adam is just got off the cruise

[Adam Devine]

and this is the first thing you want to talk about?

[Ders]

We haven't gone because you just got

[Adam Devine]

off the cruise and this is what you want to talk about?

[Ders]

Technically, I know this is airing, but I'm, I, I, I, I'm transparent. I guess you like hiding things, redacting things. Yes.

[Adam Devine]

Okay. Okay.

[Ders]

I think you're missing the compliment that Adam gave you. He was just telling you how great it is that you're taking a stand on powerful and you're misinterpreting it. He was hyping you up.

[Adam Devine]

Taking a Stand isn't necessarily a good thing. Know, maybe being neutral is a good thing for comedy.

[Blake Anderson]

You think being neutral in comedy is.

[Adam Devine]

That's. That's your. No, that has always been legalized comedy. Like, you have to have a point of view. Maybe you don't. Maybe not having a point of view. Maybe anti comedy is the new comedy.

[Ders]

Hey, let's try that on the cruise. I mean, we tried.

[Adam Devine]

We already did.

[Ders]

We already did it.

[Adam Devine]

And people loved it.

[Ders]

It was.

[Adam Devine]

People loved it.

[Ders]

Yeah. Hey, this message is brought to you

[Adam Devine]

by Pizza Hut, my brothers.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, what's up?

[Adam Devine]

Have you heard about Pizza Hut's big New Yorker?

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, yeah.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah. Well, let me tell you, it's Pizza Hut's biggest pizza. Massive slices so big you have to fold them for just $10. Do the math. It's a big deal.

[Blake Anderson]

Look, there's always that one friend who says they're not hungry and then they eat three slices. Who is that guy on this podcast? Name. Names. Blake. Is it Anders?

[Adam Devine]

I don't know. I don't. I don't know what you're talking about.

[Blake Anderson]

It is you.

[Adam Devine]

Well, I can take down six XL slices of the big New Yorker and that's easy for me. How many bites do you think it would be? 5? 10?

[Ders]

Hey, Blake.

[Blake Anderson]

Only one way to find out. Let's get one right now.

[Ders]

Not mad at that. The $10 big New Yorker is a big deal. You just can't argue with the master. Get the big New Yorker from pizza hut for $10 for a limited time.

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[Ders]

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[Blake Anderson]

so I'm with Ders and I'm about transparency and we have not gone on the CR cruise yet, but they we are about to. We could leave this Friday or Saturday. We leave Saturday, right?

[Adam Devine]

Saturday. We ship out Sunday.

[Blake Anderson]

So excited. Yeah.

[Adam Devine]

I hope we're still alive.

[Blake Anderson]

It's looking way colder than I wanted it to be.

[Ders]

Yeah.

[Blake Anderson]

And I hope, I hope we come back all tanned up and be like, actually it wasn't that bad.

[Adam Devine]

I really want it to be hot.

[Ders]

Do you think they have a tanning salon on the boat?

[Blake Anderson]

100. But what did I. What did I test you guys? It's something like the high of 59.

[Adam Devine]

No.

[Blake Anderson]

Our first day on the Very shagadelic. Yes. And the week before it was like 82 degrees. It's like a.

[Ders]

That's okay though, cuz it's. It's not super windy on the deck of a cruise ship on an open ocean, dude.

[Adam Devine]

In the Gulf of America. It's warm.

[Ders]

It's hot. Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot.

[Blake Anderson]

That's. You would say it. You would say that. That's the other stance you take. The Gulf of America.

[Adam Devine]

Hot, hot, hot, hot. It's what it's called. Called look at a map, dude.

[Ders]

Brought to you by a stance.

[Blake Anderson]

Isaac is saying the highs in the 70s.

[Ders]

Okay, but where I think Lowe's might be 59.

[Blake Anderson]

No, no, no. The high of Tampa. Our first day at night, it gets cold on water. We're.

[Adam Devine]

We're not in Tampa. That's just where we're shipping out from. We're nowhere near Tampa.

[Blake Anderson]

But the first day, we will be within range of Tampa. That's the closest city, so I don't know how else to.

[Adam Devine]

Dude, you know how fast these cruise ships are. We. Ship only goes about.

[Blake Anderson]

Okay. We, we, we leave. What, Sunday? Yes, sir. Okay. Well, it's raining.

[Adam Devine]

We already came back. It was great.

[Ders]

Okay.

[Blake Anderson]

Okay. It's raining and might have to do the highest 74. The next day, Monday. So we will be in the ocean. Will be a high of 57. And then the next day high of 60, and then next day high of 68. That's colder than where we currently are. Car. So I'm hoping. And by the way, I feel like Blake is throwing this on me, like I'm the bearer of the bad news. Yeah, I'm just looking at the weather app, homie. I'm just looking at the weather app.

[Adam Devine]

And who owns that? The people who own particle. Like, I don't fuck with apps anymore. I'm gonna get there, I'll look at the weather.

[Blake Anderson]

And it's.

[Adam Devine]

It's gonna be warm. I have a really good feeling about it.

[Ders]

Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot.

[Blake Anderson]

I hope so too.

[Adam Devine]

It's gonna be really warm. I'm gonna get sunburned.

[Blake Anderson]

So Isaac then gives contradictory information.

[Ders]

He goes himself.

[Blake Anderson]

The ship only goes 10 meters or 10 meter knots.

[Adam Devine]

I don't know.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, good.

[Ders]

Oh, okay.

[Blake Anderson]

It only goes 10 knots, which isn't that fast. 10 knots is pretty damn slow. Like when I take my boat out, I go 25 knots.

[Ders]

Yeah. Oh, this goes 10 and I know. So that's things exist because it doesn't translate exactly. But how fast are we talking here?

[Blake Anderson]

I don't know.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah. What's a knot? Is it 10 miles per hour? What's a knot?

[Blake Anderson]

I don't know.

[Adam Devine]

Why do we call them knots?

[Ders]

Is it nautical mile? Is a not a nautical mile?

[Adam Devine]

Yeah, that's a great guess.

[Blake Anderson]

So then Isaac once again doesn't answer the question and goes about 12 miles an hour.

[Adam Devine]

12 miles an hour is one knot.

[Ders]

Don't you stroke my knot?

[Blake Anderson]

No, I think that's 10 knots is about 12 miles.

[Ders]

I got a knot for you. I got a knot for you.

[Adam Devine]

Balloon knot.

[Blake Anderson]

Which isn't that fast.

[Adam Devine]

Balloon.

[Blake Anderson]

Not, not, not, not fast. But then he said, that's Tampa weather. That I'm looking at. And I'm like, right. Because there's no way to look up the weather in the middle of the ocean. Or at least not that I know.

[Ders]

Is that true?

[Adam Devine]

It's not the middle of the ocean. It's the Gulf of America. Please call it.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm so sorry.

[Adam Devine]

Please call it. I'm gonna come.

[Ders]

Hey, how have we not done, like, a golf war, like, kind of, like, themed cruise? How did we not do that? And we just do, like, paintball on deck and. And have, like, paint grenades.

[Adam Devine]

I don't know if we're the guys. I don't know if we're the guys.

[Ders]

Veterans can. Come on.

[Blake Anderson]

That's more of like. What is that? Those guys that make infinitely more money than us and are way younger than us, and all they do is trick shots, everyone.

[Adam Devine]

Dude perfect.

[Blake Anderson]

Dude perfect. You know the dude perfect guys, if they had a cruise. It's going off, dude.

[Adam Devine]

Oh, absolutely.

[Blake Anderson]

You know. You know the trick shots. Actually, how boring would a dude perfect cruise be?

[Adam Devine]

Just throwing marshmallows.

[Blake Anderson]

It's just watching a guy, like, throw the basketball from across the dip like 200 times and then finally hit it. And they're like, thank God. And then you come back with your beer and you're. You just missed it. You're like, oh.

[Adam Devine]

Oh, he got it.

[Blake Anderson]

They finally hit it.

[Adam Devine]

Not doing it again. I'm not doing it again. I can do it again. That's the.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah. My shoulder hurts too bad. So one knot is 1.15 miles an hour. Oh, my God.

[Adam Devine]

That's really slow.

[Ders]

So we're going 10 miles an hour. So everyone sees you. Basically, we.

[Blake Anderson]

Damn.

[Adam Devine]

Hello.

[Blake Anderson]

And then Isaac's point, he's saying is, we won't be in Tampa. We're gonna go 10 miles an hour. No, sir. I don't like south. And it will go get hotter the further south we go.

[Ders]

Okay.

[Blake Anderson]

Which. Sure. But we are going 10 miles an hour, so. And it is raining the day we leave.

[Adam Devine]

Well, we might have durs get his ass out there and start kicking, dude.

[Ders]

I might have to put a anchor in my teeth and swim, dude.

[Blake Anderson]

Now, jurors, are you gonna bring, like, a little banana hammock? Are you gonna.

[Ders]

Is that an official request?

[Blake Anderson]

You need another four inches. And if you want to bring one. Two. Two extras. Two extras. My thighs are juice.

[Ders]

I'll see what I got.

[Blake Anderson]

I've been back on the bike. My thighs are juice.

[Ders]

I don't. I don't know if I can.

[Blake Anderson]

You don't believe me?

[Ders]

I don't I'll put some ice down your.

[Adam Devine]

What are the rules? Oh, my God. You need to get a little sun on those Netflix.

[Ders]

Should we tell them?

[Adam Devine]

Holy moly. That look like a ham hog.

[Ders]

Now, Blake. Now, Blake. See, this is why you just had to. My man showing off his legs. And you got to just. Just nag him. You got to say, oh, go to sunshine. Just let him shine.

[Adam Devine]

Hey, now. Now, I. I'll. I'll respond to the. All RSVP to the particle to that thing right there.

[Ders]

Dude, the.

[Blake Anderson]

The. The few things that you take a stand on are partul and my thighs. But then we talk about the ep. Sudden you wish. You wish we weren't.

[Ders]

I'm on the fence about adding that to the. Yeah, it's good. I love it, but it's very long.

[Adam Devine]

You told me to put it on.

[Ders]

I know.

[Blake Anderson]

Well, you know, it's a palate cleanser. It's a palette.

[Ders]

Been wrong before. It does hit reset.

[Adam Devine]

Well, that's how I feel right now. That's how I feel right now.

[Ders]

Adam, here's an example. Adam, here's an example of something that is part of full adjacent that you probably don't love, even though I don't even think you're looking at it or you give a. Which is this Riverside studio thing that we're on right now. We used to just do a zoom. Now we gotta have a zoom and Riverside open. Riverside's weird. We don't know how to work it burn. Seemed like we're doing fine for years on zoom.

[Adam Devine]

I don't even look at Riverside. What are you talking about? I just dip. I just dip it in my tab.

[Ders]

I'm looking at Riverside because my insane on zoom. Now I don't know what's happening.

[Blake Anderson]

I think I'm looking at you on Zoom. You look totally. I mean, look how you always look.

[Ders]

I thought I looked like orange.

[Adam Devine]

You look like you wear sunglasses outside and you have, like. Like raccoon rings on your.

[Ders]

That's all very true.

[Blake Anderson]

It looks. It looks like you just went skiing.

[Adam Devine]

Did you go skiing recently?

[Blake Anderson]

Did you recently go skiing?

[Ders]

No, my family did. They left me just like my original family. No, I went back to Chicago. I did go running outdoors with the sunglasses on, so maybe that gave me a little.

[Blake Anderson]

So maybe that's it. So the reason Duras wasn't at my son's second birthday, which I'm holding you guys to these little kid birthdays, he

[Adam Devine]

didn't get the part of.

[Ders]

I agree. It was a phone call. I was like, God, Damn it. Yeah. Went home to my mom's birthday.

[Blake Anderson]

It was because it was his mother's. His mother's birthday. Which I totally respect now. So some of these friends, they didn't give a response.

[Adam Devine]

I did.

[Ders]

Not even on part of all.

[Blake Anderson]

They missed a banger of a party. Was there a bounce house?

[Adam Devine]

Was there Mountain Mike's for days?

[Blake Anderson]

Was there mountains of Mike's pizza?

[Adam Devine]

There was mountains of.

[Ders]

Tell me what mountain Mike's is. That's pizza.

[Blake Anderson]

Mountain mics I love.

[Ders]

I, I, I drove past it the other day.

[Adam Devine]

I was really surprised. You. You did mountain mics? Mountain Mik's is a kind of a deep cut. I'm kind of hyped on that for you.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh yeah. Oh, I like Mountain. Mountain Mike's.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah. What's tasty?

[Blake Anderson]

I don't. Pizza is not my favorite. And I know I, I've talked about this a lot.

[Ders]

See. And Mountain Mike's is doing what part is doing? They were like, no one wants Papa John's anymore. They want something new, something fresh. Mountain mics it.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, it's just good. Chloe. Chloe likes piz. Get it sometimes and I'll be like, okay, I'll have a slice.

[Adam Devine]

So when Chloe orders pizza, she goes Mountain Mike's.

[Blake Anderson]

She just will try a new thing every once in a while and she'll.

[Ders]

Let me ask you a question, Adam. In her phone, is there something that says Mountain Mike's and it calls her and is she telling you that she's,

[Blake Anderson]

she's just Mountain Mike's always calling her

[Ders]

Mountain Mike's calls her, calls her and

[Blake Anderson]

is always asking if she wants the pizza.

[Ders]

You want texture? You want the full bread? Sick.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah. You hungry? You want the deep dish?

[Adam Devine]

Huh?

[Ders]

Extra. It's just m. It's just Mountain Mike. It doesn't even say apostrophe S. It actually just says Mount Mike again.

[Adam Devine]

Huh.

[Ders]

The pizza's really good.

[Adam Devine]

And, and you, you did get charged for the pizza, right?

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah. And then, and then I gave him a lot of business.

[Ders]

Oh yeah.

[Blake Anderson]

And you always over order in these.

[Ders]

Emma gets from Ace is hard. And I assume it's Ace's hardware. But it says Ace is hard. I don't know. But she's, she's fixing something. Cuz I can hear her grunting from the garage.

[Adam Devine]

Sam gets Slim Jim. Slim Jim beats it.

[Ders]

Anyway, she's build. She's building something Slim Jim.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, she's used to it small. So she, she likes a slim one.

[Ders]

Slim Jim. Yeah. It's funny.

[Adam Devine]

I mean, hey, some people like a Little slim or gym.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, Jim Long and slim. Yeah. So we ordered way too much pizza, but I was like, Chloe's like, I don't want to order too much. I'm like, well, that's what we have to do. Because the last thing I want over order is, is two year olds to not have.

[Ders]

But two year olds are not eating pizza, correct?

[Adam Devine]

Pizza.

[Blake Anderson]

Pizza.

[Adam Devine]

No.

[Blake Anderson]

And you know what? I over well a little. Like the cheese pizza, you might cut it up and give them some chunks. Chunks.

[Adam Devine]

But you just throw chunks at chunks.

[Blake Anderson]

Like put them in a bowl.

[Ders]

Right. You feed them like seagulls.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah, yeah, he just throws.

[Blake Anderson]

I overestimated how much these kids were going to be eating pizza.

[Ders]

Yeah.

[Adam Devine]

Oh, come on.

[Ders]

It was almost zero, right?

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, it was almost zero.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah. There wasn't a lot. They're occupied.

[Ders]

I went to a party where someone ordered like really expensive fancy sandwiches. And I think I left and like wraps. I think I left with a hundred dollars worth of sandwiches. Because she was like, you got other kids, right? Because it was for the youngest. And she's like, they're older, like here. And I was like, walk into the car with maybe a 10 to 20 pound tray of food.

[Blake Anderson]

And I was like, that's my dream. I love sandwiches, dude.

[Adam Devine]

You know what would fix that is if in part of full in the app, if you said whether you're going to eat or. Or not, like, you should probably check the box. What are you going to do at the party? Are you going to eat? Are you going to drink? Like, you should just say everything you're projected to do.

[Blake Anderson]

You're going to drink too much.

[Ders]

But, Blake, you don't even know if it does say it does.

[Adam Devine]

You wouldn't know. But if we're really going to. If we're really going to grill people on. On if they're coming or not, you might as well say what you're going to do.

[Ders]

Are you going to grill?

[Adam Devine]

Are you. Are you going to dance? Or you get like, what do you want?

[Ders]

Like, oh, so it's. You have to do a whole check. Have to. You have to know exactly what you're going to do before you get there. You don't.

[Adam Devine]

That's what it feels like. That's what feels to me. That's what it feels like to me.

[Blake Anderson]

Offline. I'm going to ask you who here. I'm going to just ask you right now, Ders, is this the person that invited you to a thing on.

[Adam Devine]

Don't put Epstein.

[Ders]

Don't blow them up.

[Blake Anderson]

I just want to party on par.

[Adam Devine]

Don't put Epstein.

[Ders]

I don't want to blow him up. Don't put.

[Adam Devine]

Put a.

[Blake Anderson]

Here. I'm. I'm putting them in. In the chat because I don't know this person, But I was just invited to a party.

[Adam Devine]

Friendship.

[Blake Anderson]

And I don't know who this is or what this is.

[Adam Devine]

I don't know who that is. That isn't. That seems like a fake name. That seems like a name from D.

[Blake Anderson]

Yes, that is the person.

[Adam Devine]

What?

[Blake Anderson]

Okay, so I must know them, too.

[Adam Devine]

What? You guys, this is the same person.

[Ders]

And by the way, if they came into my home right now wearing an outfit that had not aged and wearing the exact same clothes last time I saw them, I would not know this person. I would maybe.

[Adam Devine]

That literally looks like a name for, like, a character. If you play dnd and you have, like, an elf. And by the way that it looks like a fantasy name.

[Ders]

I'm not saying anything negative about this person. What I'm saying is this is just not. I just haven't. We moved on, bruh.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah. I haven't met this person. By the way, I'm looking at. I've been invited to a lot of things on part of whole.

[Ders]

It's out of control.

[Blake Anderson]

I never check it. The island needs to be. It's out of control.

[Ders]

You never. You never check it either.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, no, I don't check it. That's what I was saying. I'm like, dude, this is just for my wife.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah, but you straight up came up to me and, like, you approached me in San Francisco and said, like, respond to the particle. You grabbed me by my collar.

[Blake Anderson]

No, I didn't. And the reason I. The reason I did that is Chloe was right there with Bo.

[Ders]

Jackson was right behind you.

[Blake Anderson]

Chloe was next to me. And so then I go. I make a show of it.

[Ders]

That's not true. That's not true. Because we talked about it before. She was there.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah, this was at the tonga room.

[Ders]

I think you're redacting certain things that happened here.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm not a redacter.

[Ders]

We.

[Blake Anderson]

Oh, is that right Here to show the file? She was on my ass to get people to respond to the particle.

[Adam Devine]

So you're the muscle. You're kind of the Adam.

[Ders]

If you think that was a seamless cover by being like. I didn't mean she was there. I meant she was on my ass about it. That was amazing.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm a dude. I thought. No, I thought. I thought she was there with us.

[Adam Devine]

No, but.

[Blake Anderson]

No, you.

[Adam Devine]

You grill me about rsvp. But I guess I get it now. You get sent. You're kind of the must.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah.

[Adam Devine]

And you get. You get people to respond to the kids birthday party invites.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, well, she wanted a head count, dude. What am I supposed to do? Well, that's a battle I'm fighting. I'm fighting battles on all fronts. I'm just trying to.

[Ders]

I kind of. I kind of hate it. My. My whole thing is, look, invite all these people, buy enough food, and if people don't show up, they didn't show up.

[Adam Devine]

But then you end up with. How many leftover pizzas did you have?

[Ders]

It doesn't matter.

[Adam Devine]

But I just want to know how many leftovers over pizza.

[Ders]

So you gave them the als?

[Blake Anderson]

Probably like eight.

[Ders]

God, that's a lot.

[Blake Anderson]

A lot of pizza I bought.

[Adam Devine]

Holy. That's a mountain of pizza.

[Ders]

How many did you keep? How many did you keep? Cuz you're like, I'll distribute these like across the next week.

[Blake Anderson]

Well, by the way, I don't even like pizza, but my mom kept like eight pizzas. There's so many pizzas. Since we have an extra, you can just freeze them.

[Ders]

You can just freeze.

[Blake Anderson]

So she's like, you could just have them. That's exactly what she said.

[Ders]

Just freeze it.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm like, I don't want to. I. We're not freezing this pizza.

[Ders]

No, you got to keep that attitude.

[Adam Devine]

As soon as you freeze Mountain Mike, it. It turns into complete asshole. Right? Like, no pizza that gets delivered freezes. Well, it doesn't reheat.

[Blake Anderson]

Like, I would not think it would taste great.

[Adam Devine]

I've never frozen.

[Ders]

Isn't. Isn't cold pizza a whole culture of

[Adam Devine]

its own cold pizza? But frozen pizza is a whole different.

[Blake Anderson]

And then defrosted pizza. I'm not a big, big freezer. If something goes in my freezer, it goes there to die. I will not look in that freezer. My parents, they live and die by this freezer. I'm like, if I put it in my freezer, it I. You know what? You know what I have in my freezer forever that I was trying to get into?

[Ders]

Don't tell. Don't tell me.

[Blake Anderson]

Let's try to get. Oh, boy. What do you got?

[Ders]

Dude, dude, you beat me to it.

[Blake Anderson]

I was going to say sorry. The redacted files got it.

[Adam Devine]

It.

[Blake Anderson]

The unredacted files, but I do have Cornish game hens in my freezer. I was trying to get into grilling in the freezer. Yeah, it was like. It was like I ordered something from Omaha Steaks. And I'm like, hey, we can throw these cornish game hens in for cheaper. And I'm like, maybe I'm never gonna. I'm never gonna grow the Cornish game head.

[Ders]

No.

[Adam Devine]

Just not gonna do it. No. I wouldn't even know where to begin with a cornish gain head game.

[Blake Anderson]

It would take me months to learn.

[Ders]

Have you guys thought about becoming, like, grill masters? Is this something every guy goes through

[Blake Anderson]

where you're like, yes, yes.

[Ders]

Maybe I'm just going to, like, learn how to make the perfect steak, but you got to eat, like, 10 steaks to, like, really become the guy. Maybe. I don't know, maybe three.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm a dude. Oh, by the way, I'm pretty good on the grill. I'm pretty good on the grill, but I. You know, then you got to get the smoke.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah.

[Blake Anderson]

You got to get to this, and then you got to get to that, and it's a lot. And you know what? The one. The one part I do want to get, though, I want to. I want to be able to cook a brisket and then have those black gloves that they wear. You know, the. The grill master always has, like, black gloves.

[Adam Devine]

You could use those for, like, a wood.

[Blake Anderson]

A wood block. And then you. You chop it all up. That's what I want to be.

[Ders]

You know what he's putting in the freezer with those black gloves? Are those the black gloves where you

[Blake Anderson]

can, like, literally, like, why are you saying that, Blake? What. What else can I do with those black gloves? Is that something that you learn from.

[Adam Devine]

No, no, no, no, no, no. I'm not. Not on the list at all, allegedly. I would never be.

[Ders]

Are these the black me?

[Adam Devine]

No way.

[Ders]

Okay, you keep.

[Blake Anderson]

You keep bringing them up. We're not talking about that.

[Ders]

Are these the black gloves where you can, like, literally reach into a fire and, like, grab, like, a hot coal kind of thing?

[Adam Devine]

They're just rubber.

[Blake Anderson]

No, I think they're just rubber gloves. They're just the rubber.

[Ders]

So you count me out.

[Blake Anderson]

Disgusting.

[Ders]

It's really gotta have the ones where you can grab the logs.

[Adam Devine]

It's kind of crazy, like, with barbecuing, like, anytime you start to, like, really get passionate, you just teeter on. It starts to get quiet horny. You know what I mean? Like, you're like. All of a sudden, you're just barbecue guy. Like, well, you never stop talking about the barbecue. Like, you, like.

[Ders]

Like, it's okay. You can just commit to something.

[Blake Anderson]

It's okay to just.

[Adam Devine]

I don't. Yeah, but the passion is what Gets a little corny to me, man.

[Ders]

It's like passion is the only thing that keeps society from exploding into the files.

[Blake Anderson]

And Blake, who are you trying to impress, homie?

[Adam Devine]

I'm just like, all of a sudden, I'm like, I'm hitting you with corny.

[Ders]

To who?

[Adam Devine]

I'm like, hitting you up with the. And I'm like, come try my. My fucking Cornish game hen. I'm like, experimenting this weekend, and it's like every weekend.

[Blake Anderson]

I would love that.

[Ders]

And you know what I do? I would text you. I'll be there, and I'll be eating, and I might be dancing. If there's karaoke, one song.

[Adam Devine]

I will say, like, barbecuing is probably the coolest trickle down thing, because if the homie is, like, experimenting with barbecue, you're gonna want to be there in the splash zone.

[Ders]

Oh, I thought being on pilot would be cool.

[Blake Anderson]

So your friend Sean B. Sean B. Who is a great many amazing. So you think he's corny? Is that what you're saying? You think your boy Sean bees a little? You think he's corny? Is that what you're saying?

[Adam Devine]

I kind of felt like Sean B. Was like, born to do it. Like, me, if I'm, like, learning, I just. Maybe I have, like, low expectations. Like, I will never actually be good at.

[Ders]

Hey, Blake, no one is born to do anything except eating shit.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah. You just figure it out as you go.

[Adam Devine]

You kind of realize pretty early if you're, like, good or not.

[Ders]

And then you sure have a. Then you develop your passion, and then you become good at it. And no one thinks you're corny unless you're corny about it.

[Adam Devine]

You don't think you. Like, there's stuff where you're like, I'm gonna do this. And you're just obviously are never gonna be good at it.

[Blake Anderson]

But that's fine. That's fine as long as you like to do it. And also it's grilling food. I guarantee you, you can grill a stack stake, right? And you. You can look.

[Ders]

And I. I understand the. I understand the complex of not being. Of being like. Of not doing. Not continuing something you are not good at. Like, if you just don't get good at it.

[Adam Devine]

Like, why am I trying to be this guy?

[Ders]

But. But it's not being a guy. It's being you doing something. Unless you want to. Unless you hate yourself and you don't want to be yourself. And so you're like, if I start cooking, I'm on record.

[Adam Devine]

Record.

[Ders]

If you're If I start cooking burgers, I'm going to lose myself, and I can become this new guy. It'll be beautiful. But maybe you like yourself so much you don't want to learn anything new, because then you'll become a different guy.

[Adam Devine]

I'm perfect.

[Ders]

Got it.

[Blake Anderson]

Perfect for that guy, pal. Any takebacks, any apologies, any epic slams,

[Ders]

I'll let Blake have the floor. No.

[Adam Devine]

You guys have a lot to take back before I take back any.

[Ders]

Any redactions.

[Adam Devine]

Take it back. You have a lot.

[Blake Anderson]

What if I take it back? What do I have to take back, Blake?

[Adam Devine]

Yeah, you tell me, brother. I can't walk it. I can. I can lead the horse to water, but I can't make it drink.

[Ders]

All right, that's not your path.

[Blake Anderson]

Okay, Lead me to water then. And then I'll decide whether or not I drink it. Okay, so I'm using your. What you just said.

[Adam Devine]

And I'm just saying you made a lot of accusations today that are false.

[Blake Anderson]

I didn't. What? That you are allegedly in the file.

[Adam Devine]

Yes, yes.

[Blake Anderson]

Okay. I'm just calling it as I'm seeing.

[Adam Devine]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

[Blake Anderson]

All I'm saying is.

[Adam Devine]

And you in the water. You in the water, you die.

[Blake Anderson]

Why are you so nervous? Why are you so scared to talk about the. That's all I'm saying.

[Adam Devine]

It's not right. It's not right. It's not something to joke about. What is it? It's not something to joke about.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm not joking about it. I want more of the files to come out because I want these guys to go to jail when you keep saying I want it all to go away. Why are we still talking about this?

[Adam Devine]

What?

[Blake Anderson]

It's. It's a Democrat hoax. What?

[Adam Devine]

I didn't say about this.

[Ders]

I'm reading.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm reading between the lines.

[Adam Devine]

You're the friend with Biden, all right? You're the friend with Biden, not me.

[Blake Anderson]

He's not me. He's not in the files. He's not in the files.

[Adam Devine]

True.

[Ders]

Yet. I don't know how to work a goddamn computer. All righty. Adam, are you going to be up in Hollywood. Hollywood. This weekend before the cruise. Or not? Are you down? You down? Are you down?

[Blake Anderson]

I'm down.

[Ders]

Damn it.

[Adam Devine]

I was gonna tell you.

[Ders]

They're doing for Monarch Legacy of monsters. We're back with season two, and they're doing a, like, Guinness Book of World Records drone situation on Friday night where they're gonna have, like, 600 foot tall, like, Godzilla fighting another monster. Like, in the sky over Hollywood Forever Cemetery, which you would probably be able

[Adam Devine]

to see from Amazing.

[Ders]

You're up, but you're down.

[Blake Anderson]

Way tight. That sounds way tight. And the kiddos would love that. And the kiddo, meaning plural.

[Adam Devine]

Yes. Which. The old Godzilla movies are also just so sick. When's the last time you watched old Godzilla movies? They are so good.

[Ders]

Every night. I'm so entrenched in the monsterverse.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, I don't like them.

[Adam Devine]

Like, Godzilla versus Mechagodzilla or whatever is so, so good.

[Blake Anderson]

Dude.

[Adam Devine]

It's literally the best.

[Ders]

No, the o. The OG Godzilla is kind of sick, and you can't believe how old it is for how good it looks and for how, like, you're, like, in it. You're like, whoa, this is good. But the ones in the 80s and the 70s. I know what you're talking about. Where it's like. It's a dude doing karate dressed as, like, a. A dog from space.

[Adam Devine]

Yeah.

[Ders]

So cool, dude.

[Blake Anderson]

I'm like, dude, the 70s, it's a bot. It got pretty weird.

[Adam Devine]

The 70s were pretty weird. Rad.

[Blake Anderson]

Like, did you guys see the. The thing I posted the other day? It was like, when you have. You think that was another episode.

[Adam Devine]

I blocked you.

[Ders]

I blocked you when you're.

[Blake Anderson]

When you're in your 40s and you have a toddler thinking, it'll be fun. It'll keep me young. And then it was a little person, like, doing karate but being absolutely insane and, like, coming down the. Coming down the curtains and, like, scratching down and then, like, doing flips and. And I'm like, the 70s were insane. How was this in a movie? It. First of all, it looked horrific. And secondly, maybe offensive to toddlers.

[Adam Devine]

They're just. They're just doing whatever they can, man.

[Ders]

Or to little people.

[Blake Anderson]

To little people.

[Adam Devine]

To little people. Yeah. Well, that wasn't on the map yet. That wasn't on the map.

[Ders]

Isn't it all relative when, like, you first saw Jaws? You're like, oh, my God. Now you watch it, and you're kind of like, well, looks like a styrofoam shark. It's just like, it's. It's what you've seen before versus what you haven't. I don't know. Right.

[Adam Devine]

Okay.

[Ders]

Isn't there stuff we grew up on? I mean, Jurassic park still holds up, except for when he leans on the belly of the triceratops and you're like,

[Adam Devine]

that's just like Jumanji.

[Blake Anderson]

Yeah, I. I'm watching a lot of, like, kids movies. You know, just both style and.

[Adam Devine]

Why are you watching kids movies?

[Blake Anderson]

Because of my son.

[Ders]

And.

[Blake Anderson]

And Toy Story is still so dope. But you do see a difference between Toy Story 1 and Toy Story 3 in just the.

[Ders]

Wait, hang on. Do you think those are real toys?

[Adam Devine]

No toys. Toy Story 1 has a lot of like, negative space. Like, like the area is not used. It's just like a lot of just color.

[Ders]

What's real dope? I just watched three the other night, which is a masterpiece piece. If you, if you look at the characters who are from Toy Story 1, they're still very like, simple. And then the newer ones are way more detailed than all that, which is sick. They kind of kept them, period or whatever you want to call that.

[Blake Anderson]

Okay, and that was another episode.

[Ders]

This is.

[Adam Devine]

Important. This message is brought to you by Pizza Hut.

[Blake Anderson]

Hey guys, have you heard about Pizza Hut's big New Yorker? It's Pizza Hut's biggest pizza. Massive slices so big you have to fold, hold them for just $10. Do the math. It's a big deal.

[Adam Devine]

Oh yeah. Now that's a good investment for your stomach. What can you even buy with 10 bucks these days anyway?

[Blake Anderson]

Not much.

[Adam Devine]

Especially something that can deliver that level of happiness per minute.

[Blake Anderson]

Yummy.

[Adam Devine]

Look, we said we weren't good at math, but I am not mad at 6 XL slices of pizza for only 10 bucks.

[Ders]

Hey, you just can't argue with the math. Get the big New Yorker from pizza hut for $10 for a limited time. So Better is this simple super sports app where you can make a couple predictions on player stats and win real money. No confusing stuff. It's built for regular people. It's stupid simple. You just pick more or less. That's literally it. So if you know Ball, you might as well get paid for from it. Takes 30 seconds to sign up and it's available in 33 plus states.

[Adam Devine]

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[Ders]

Stop leaving money on the table and download better today. That's BETR must be 18 or older and physically located in a jurisdiction where Better Picks operates. Concerned about your play? Call the NCPG at 1-800-522-4700.

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[Ders]

Chelsea after the Big Game.

[Blake Anderson]

Like most people, I kept thinking about the commercials, and there was one that stayed with me.

[Ders]

It was from the Blue Square Alliance

[Blake Anderson]

Against Hate, and it wasn't loud or flashy. It showed a Jewish kid being targeted at school and another student who chose not to ignore it. As someone who was Jewish, that moment

[Ders]

felt very real to me. Not dramatic, just familiar.

[Blake Anderson]

And what struck me was how clearly it showed that hate doesn't always announce itself, but the impact is still huge. If you saw the Blue Square spot

[Ders]

during the Big Game, it's worth thinking about. And if you want to show support, support. Sharing the Blue Square is one small way to do that.

[Weatherbug Announcer]

This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.