Trusting God in Uncertainty: Navigating Grief, Singleness & Obedience ft. Juiceee

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Trusting God in Uncertainty: Navigating Grief, Singleness & Obedience ft. Juiceee"

Released on March 16, 2025, "To My Sisters" is a heartfelt podcast hosted by Courtney Daniella Boateng and Renée Kapuku, dedicated to fostering a community of sisters worldwide through discussions on holistic wellness, personal growth, and spiritual development. In this compelling episode, the hosts are joined by their dear friend and guest, Juiceee, affectionately known as Juice, who shares her profound journey of faith, grief, and obedience.

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1. Introduction to Juiceee’s Story

The episode begins with Juiceee's poignant introduction, setting the stage for a deeply personal conversation.

• Juice [00:34]: "Trigger Warning."

Juice immediately signals the sensitive nature of her story, preparing listeners for a candid discussion about her past struggles and triumphs.

2. The Journey from New York to London

Juice recounts her life transition from New York to London, marking a significant turning point in her life.

• Juice [03:35]: "This journey is actually seven years in the making."

She elaborates on her seven-year path, mentioning her struggles post-university, her initial disobedience by venturing into teaching despite divine warnings, and the subsequent challenges that led her to nearly take her own life.

3. Overcoming Adversity and Finding Faith

A critical moment in Juice's narrative is her near-suicide experience and how divine intervention played a role in her salvation.

• Juice [08:37]: "The moment that he saved me from committing suicide."

She describes the vivid sensory experiences she had during her darkest hour, attributing her survival to God's grace. This pivotal event rekindled her faith and set her on a path of redemption.

4. Confronting Trauma and Rebuilding Identity

Juice delves into her traumatic past, revealing the long-term effects of childhood sexual abuse and its impact on her personal growth and relationships.

• Juice [10:02]: "Since the age of seven, I've been sexually abused."

Despite these harrowing experiences, Juice emphasizes how God's grace preserved her sense of self, enabling her to navigate adulthood with resilience and a renewed identity in faith.

5. Obedience and Divine Guidance

Juice discusses her obedience to God's calling, particularly her move to London in pursuit of a divinely orchestrated marriage.

• Juice [03:35]: "The Lord eventually confirmed to me, yes, you are getting married. Yes, your husband is in London." [04:09]

Her decision to move was not merely for romantic reasons but was deeply rooted in her obedience and trust in God's plan, showcasing her commitment to living a faith-driven life.

6. Navigating Grief and Singlehood

The episode touches on Juice's grief following her father's passing and how she continued to trust in God's plan during her season of waiting.

• Juice [07:46]: "December 1st, I booked the ticket. December 17th, I'm in London." [07:46]

Her story illustrates the balance between mourning and moving forward, relying on faith to guide her through uncertainty and loss.

7. Building Community in a New City

Juice shares her experiences of establishing a new support network in London, highlighting the challenges and triumphs of making new friends in a foreign environment.

• Juice [52:29]: "The hardest part about trying to make friends is really less about if there are people available to them and really more about are you willing to be available for them." [52:29]

She emphasizes the importance of vulnerability and openness in forming meaningful relationships, reinforcing the podcast's theme of sisterhood and community.

8. The Role of Faith in Personal Relationships

A significant portion of the conversation centers on how faith influences Juice's approach to relationships, both romantic and platonic.

• Courtney [58:06]: "Proverbs says, if you want friends, prove yourself friendly." [58:06]

Juice echoes this sentiment, advocating for authenticity and intentionality in building connections that honor God and foster genuine support systems.

9. Final Wisdom and Blessings

In the concluding segment, Juice offers heartfelt advice to listeners, encouraging them to recognize their worth in God's eyes and to nurture their inner strength and faith.

• Juice [60:13]: "To my sisters, I want you to remember that the same God who called you and formed you is the same God who knows you and wants you." [60:13]

The hosts and Juice conclude with a collective prayer, seeking blessings for Juice's future endeavors and relationships, symbolizing the supportive and uplifting nature of the "To My Sisters" community.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Juice [00:34]: "Trigger Warning."

• Juice [03:35]: "This journey is actually seven years in the making."

• Juice [08:37]: "The moment that he saved me from committing suicide."

• Juice [10:02]: "Since the age of seven, I've been sexually abused."

• Juice [03:35]: "The Lord eventually confirmed to me, yes, you are getting married. Yes, your husband is in London."

• Juice [52:29]: "Are you willing to be available for them."

• Courtney [58:06]: "Proverbs says, if you want friends, prove yourself friendly."

• Juice [60:13]: "To my sisters, I want you to remember that the same God who called you and formed you is the same God who knows you and wants you."

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Key Themes and Insights

1. Faith and Obedience: Juice's unwavering trust in God's plan, even amidst adversity, underscores the importance of obedience in navigating life's uncertainties.

2. Healing from Trauma: Her journey highlights how confronting and processing past traumas can lead to profound personal growth and a strengthened sense of identity.

3. Community and Sisterhood: Building a supportive network is crucial, especially in new environments, and fosters resilience and joy.

4. Balancing Grief and Joy: Juice exemplifies how it's possible to honor one's grief while also embracing joy, demonstrating the transformative power of faith.

5. Authentic Relationships: Emphasizing genuine connections based on mutual support and respect, rooted in shared faith and values.

6. Spiritual Partnership: Viewing life as a collaborative journey with God, where personal endeavors and relationships are aligned with divine purpose.

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Conclusions

In this episode of "To My Sisters," Juiceee offers a powerful testament to the strength of faith, the importance of obedience, and the resilience required to overcome personal hardships. Her story serves as an inspiration for listeners navigating their own journeys of trust, grief, and seeking meaningful relationships. Through candid conversations and shared wisdom, the hosts and Juice reinforce the essence of sisterhood and the vital role of a supportive community in fostering holistic wellness and spiritual growth.

For those seeking solace, inspiration, or a sense of community, this episode provides invaluable insights into living a life grounded in faith and connected through authentic relationships.

Transcript

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[Juice]

Juice.

[Courtney]

Juice, baby.

[Juice]

Trigger Warning.

[Courtney]

You are a New Yorker, but we are currently in London.

[Renee]

Yeah.

[Courtney]

And this is now where you live.

[Juice]

I was taking care of my father at the time. He ends up getting a bit sicker. And then November 2022, he passes. November 16, 2022, he passes. December 1, I booked the ticket. December 17, I'm in London. It got really dark, really quick, and I almost committed suicide because I had already planned it like I was going to jump in front of a bus. I didn't want anybody to, like, question themselves, so I was going to make it look like an accident. I was sexually abused since the age of seven. First time it happened, my mom was actually in the other room. Everybody thought I fell off the face of the earth. I was okay with going to hell. Just. If this was the only conversation that we had, but it saved one life, then praise the Lord for that. Because that means I can. I can go to my father happy and hear well done, my good and faithful servant. Because the one soul that I was supposed to touch, I touch the day I decided I wanted to commit suicide.

[Courtney]

I died that day.

[Renee]

Hello and welcome to the two My Sisters podcast. I'm Renee.

[Courtney]

I'm Courtney.

[Juice]

And I'm Ju.

[Renee]

So we are your online sisters and hosts of the 2 My Sisters podcast.

[Courtney]

We are all about promoting the wellness, growth and development of a community of sisters around the world.

[Renee]

And in today's episode, we have a very special guest, a trusted vet, none other than Juice.

[Courtney]

Juice, baby.

[Juice]

Commotion.

[Renee]

Commotion. Commotion.

[Juice]

Commotion.

[Courtney]

Welcome, Juice. We absolutely have been looking forward to this conversation right here. Right, Juice? If you do not know, if you haven't, if you ain't got Juice. Right, Right. Juice is a presenter, a host, a comedian, and a woman of God.

[Renee]

Yeah.

[Courtney]

Hallelujah.

[Renee]

Let's go.

[Juice]

Amen.

[Courtney]

And a content creator as well. Killing it on the Internet street.

[Renee]

Wow.

[Courtney]

And you are American.

[Juice]

Specifically New York. It's really. It's really a whole other country in itself.

[Courtney]

Yeah. So, yeah, she's a New Yorker. Yeah. And I want us to start there.

[Renee]

Yeah.

[Courtney]

Because obviously you. You even hosted the two My Sisters live show. Right.

[Juice]

If you didn't come, you.

[Renee]

You did.

[Courtney]

That night was good, guys.

[Renee]

It was so good.

[Courtney]

That was a good night.

[Renee]

No, honestly, probably our best show.

[Courtney]

Our best show. And you were one of the co hosts, along with Adela Rafadi.

[Juice]

Our girl.

[Courtney]

Our girl. And you guys killed it. Icebreakers were on 10. And I guess people see you in your element of hosting and, you know, in short bursts in terms of the clips and stuff. But maybe people don't know your story.

[Juice]

Right.

[Courtney]

And the fact that you are a New Yorker. But we are currently in London.

[Renee]

Yeah.

[Courtney]

And this is now where you live. This is all a recent development. So take us to Juice. A year ago. A year and a bit ago in New York. And what made you think, let me pack up my bags and move to London town?

[Juice]

Well, I'm going to keep it short and concise because it's a long story, but this journey is actually seven years in the making.

[Renee]

Wow.

[Juice]

Yeah. So seven years ago, you know, coming out of uni, your girl was down and, you know, trying to figure out what life was all about. However, things were getting real crazy and I was like, you know what? Let's just do something else. How about that? Because, you know, you don't know what you're gonna do outside of uni. Had no plans, no nothing. Didn't want to do the degree, couldn't find a job. Also, that was chemistry.

[Renee]

Yeah, but you're a stem girl.

[Juice]

I am. It's. Yeah. Chemistry, concentration and biochem.

[Courtney]

Let me tell you something, the funniest girls.

[Renee]

Yeah, that's true.

[Juice]

So with that degree, I actually ended up going into teaching. But the Lord was warning me no. And I wasn't listening. So when I went into teaching, which I was teaching chemistry, I was actually in disobedience. And that started a process because obviously once you head into disobedience, you kind of have to go through the process of now undoing all that was done. So fast forward in that moment. It got really dark, really quick. And I almost committed suicide from there. Praise the Lord. He stopped that from happening. And I went through a deliverance period and like an isolation period of two years where like, literally wasn't chatting to nobody. I'm talking about, like, even, like, you know, when Jesus tells the disciples, I'm sending you to a place. If you see somebody, don't talk to them. Just go exactly, like, straight like that. Like, strict. Like, I couldn't. Everybody thought I fell off the face of the earth for two years. Two years. And this was pre Covid. So I completely missed the whole, like, people getting famous online. I missed that whole content creator, all of that, because, like, I was already in lockdown before the world was a knockdown. So, boom, I'm there. It's me and my dad. My parents are separated at the time. And essentially during this time, I never had a desire for marriage or nothing, especially after everything I went through. I was like, lord, you know what me, we finna be locked in. I don't want nobody's dusty son coming up in here and ruining what we got going on. Because this. This is good, you know? So, no, honestly. Cause, like, let's be real. Like, I feel like people don't realize, like, when you really meet Jesus, like, you don't want nobody coming in between that. Like. And that's really where I was. And I said I had to tell my mom, you don't have to wait for my sister to give you grandkids, because I'm just really not about it. Not some bitter, not because I'm nothing, but because I understood how broken I was, and I didn't want to damage a man who was sent to love me because of my brokenness.

[Courtney]

Wow.

[Juice]

You know, so it's like, in a sense, I kind of already love that man enough to tell the Lord, like, you can keep him over there, because I would hurt him, I would damage him, and I don't want that to be the case. So I ended up having a conversation with someone during the beginning of the school year. I'm still in this isolation period, by the way. And then she's like, oh, so what about your, you know, you know, you got a blue or anything that. I'm like, no, it's just me, but I wouldn't mind, you know, I'm open to it. I just genuinely don't feel like my man is in New York. I feel like he's in London or something. Literally, less than a week later, the Lord puts the desire for marriage in my heart. And I said, oh, this must. Because I didn't say it was the devil. I said, this must be my flesh. What is this? So I started praying into it, praying into it and praying into it. And then the Lord eventually confirmed to me, yes, you are getting married. Yes, your husband is in London, and yes, you are going back into the entertainment industry. So, yeah, so then that was like a year and a half bit. I was taking care of my father at the time. He ends up getting a bit sicker. And then November 2022, he passes. November 16, 20, 22, he passes to go home with the Lord. And the Lord said, now's the time. And I said, as in, like, as they're declared? Yes.

[Courtney]

He's gone.

[Juice]

So what you mean now? I said now. I said, oh, okay. So December 1st, I booked the ticket. December 17th, I'm in London. So a month after my father passed.

[Renee]

Wow.

[Juice]

Yeah.

[Renee]

Big J.

[Juice]

So that's the how we got here.

[Renee]

Let's backpedal just a little bit. You know, I think what I love about your story is I'm really hearing a lot of trust, trust in the Lord.

[Juice]

It's.

[Renee]

The Lord told me. And I moved, you know, obedience. Especially after you had just spoken about, you know, a period or a season of disobedience. So let's backpedal a little bit. What was your faith journey like during this period? When do you feel like you really developed your faith, as it were, to the level that it is now? And probably in that period where you then were obedient to that voice so quickly?

[Juice]

The moment that he saved me from committing suicide. Because I had already planned it. Like, I was gonna jump in front of a bus. I didn't want anybody to, like, question themselves, so I was gonna make it look like an accident. Like, I planned a photo shoot that day. Cause I was doing hair at the time as well. So I planned a photo shoot, did this whole thing, like. And if anybody's ever had, like, a near suicide experience, it's something about the way, like, you. You can't tell me it's not a spiritual experience because you can feel the enemy lift from you. It. You see color for the first time, you can breathe for the first time. Like, air was crisp. The. The sun was so shiny. Like, it was so beautiful. But it's like you're taking it all in. Like, I was. I was genuinely okay. And mind you, I'm a believer at this time, I was okay with going to hell. That's how deep it was for me.

[Courtney]

Wow.

[Juice]

Like, I was okay. I knew making this decision that, you know, because the Lord said, the word says what the word says. So I was okay with whatever the result was, because I just couldn't understand where I was in life, and I couldn't make peace with it. And I was just ready to go.

[Courtney]

Can I ask you to unpack that, though?

[Juice]

Yeah.

[Courtney]

What? Because obviously there's confusion around, like, maybe your job, your career, what am I meant to be doing? But what was that depth of pain that brought you to that place of, I want to end my life? And I'm okay going to hell for it.

[Juice]

So since the age of seven, I've been sexually abused. Trigger warning, by the way. I was sexually abused since the age of seven. First time it happened, my mom was actually in the other room. And from that moment, I lost my voice in a sense, my sense, my ability to feel, because I knew she was in another room, but I couldn't scream. And I don't know what it was, but every house we went to, every babysitter I went to from the age of seven even into my adulthood, every, boys, girls, adults, and then even in my elder years, like, violently, you know, assaulted and stuff, but for me, it never burdened me. Like, the way you see me now is how I've always been. And I've always lived in this bubble of, like, everything's okay, everything's. And that was the Lord's way of actually preserving me. Like, I've never blamed the Lord, I never blamed my parents. It's like the gift that he gave me was the knowledge of myself. So what the enemy tried to steal from me, which is that sense of self, I never lost as a kid. It wasn't until I was in disobedience where I lost my sense of self. And I happened to have turning 8:25 at the time as well. When the synapses connected, the bubble popped. Also, the reality of my family dynamics and the things that you think are true and don't know and bless, like, but my mother did the best that she could. My father did the best that they could. Like I said, I never blamed them or nothing. But when you realize the cares of the world and you realize, like, in spite of all the things that you did and tried to do, the neglect of me was still a reality as well. So it's like having to essentially come to the understanding that your heroes are really the villains of your story. As much as, you know, you love them and they love you. And that was like. Because it made me realize that every. Every relation or relationship situationship that I experienced, the way that I managed myself, even the way that I was, you know, managing myself at work and things like, just mindsets that I would have, like, this stunted growth that I had mentally was all due to the experience that I had from the age of seven. So, yeah, that. And funny enough, I had ended up going to therapy and I'm. I'm very much a thoughtful person. So I'm telling the therapist everything that I know, and I'm essentially like, giving him, like, this is what it Is. But I know that. I know the root of it. And blah, blah, blah. He goes, wow, you've made my job so easy. Like, I don't even have to, like, do anything. And I said that was. That was really what did it for me. I said, well, if you can't help me, I never wanted to do therapy, but I said, if you can't help me, then I guess there's no. There's no hope in this. So that was.

[Courtney]

That is a lot, and I thank you for sharing that, because you really did not have to. And I know that there are probably a lot of sisters who can relate to that repeated abuse.

[Juice]

Yeah.

[Courtney]

But also what you so powerfully said. The heroes of your stories were actually the villain. The people who maybe were meant to be there to protect you were only doing with what they had, what they could. Still feeling that neglect and the pain of that. And I think that there's something, you know, that's. That's proven through research around significant traumatic events that happen around the age of seven, around those really, like, those developmental years that arrests your development and keeps you kind of pinned to that moment. And I think there's. As you were speaking, it brought something to mind. I remember watching. What's that show? The Real. The Real. And Lonnie. Lonnie Goode. Yeah, I'll think about Lonnie. Lonnie was saying something about how it's the funniest people that have the saddest stories. And I think there's something about your pain that runs really deep. So how did you not allow that to affect the way you saw God now that you were saved?

[Juice]

That was grace. Because I grew up. Both my. I grew up in a Christian household, but that was grace. There's certain things when you. When you recognize. And that's why I think, even now, going back to the original question, why my faith is what it is now, after seeing the hand of God, when you go back and you see Lord, you were truly there. Like I said, the thing that the enemy came to steal was my identity. And the gift that the Lord gave me to go through it was my identity. I was able to see myself and see how I could make people laugh and this, that, and the third. Even from a young age, and even like I was. I was, you know, my mom's rock, my dad's rock. So they were. They've been child. They had issues ever since, you know, I was a kid, but I was always the voice. The voice of the ear for both of them, you know, And Even at that age. So this is another layer of trauma that, you know, you, as a child, you shouldn't be exposed to these things, but, you know, you're there and then. But being able to, like, make my mom laugh, make my dad laugh, and bring light, you know, it always was genuinely a joy for me, and I think even more now because a lot of people, they always try to say, like, oh, you know, how could a good God, if he's such a good God, how could he let you go through all this other stuff? And. And I'm like, you don't know what the scripture says. The Word says he takes our mourning and turns it into dancing our sorrow into joy. And if you see the joy that I have, it's only because I know the depths of sorrow and it was transformed. And that is the mighty hand of the God that I serve. Like, that he can take something that is so messy and make a masterpiece and display that nothing is ever that broken to be fixed, you know? So that is. That for me, is. Is. It's. It even makes me even more just grateful. Like, Tiana, always. My best friend. Tiana always says, it's the little things. You always get so excited of the little things. And I'm just like, the Lord is in the details. Like, if this table could talk when it was a tree, it would talk about the grandeur of the Lord. You know, are you a poet? You know, maybe a prophet?

[Renee]

We've spoken about this at length.

[Courtney]

If this table could talk when it was a tree, it would talk of the grandeur of the Lord.

[Juice]

Grandeur.

[Courtney]

Shakespeare could even write it, Lord.

[Renee]

Clicks, clicks, clicks.

[Juice]

I'm telling you.

[Renee]

Wow. Juice.

[Courtney]

Juice.

[Renee]

Genuinely, I'm processing, as a lot of you Americans say, I'm processing a process. I love that you said that, because I think what your story really speaks of is redemption and the fact that there is nothing, no one and no situation that is beyond redemption, specifically, God's redemption. And I think a lot of women that are probably listening to this podcast have experienced similar things, have gone through similar things, and feel as though they are incapable of getting to the other side. And I think your story is one of hope, because when I think about Juice, Juice is generally genuinely one of the most joyful people that I know. Genuinely one of the most joyful, funniest. Like, literally, it's Juice the entertainer.

[Courtney]

Entertainer.

[Renee]

And I. I think what's. What's beautiful about having you in this conversation is that we finally get to showcase just an ounce of the true depth that you have and the depth that you display. So thank you for sharing that in terms of, I guess bringing back that joy into your life. Right. So the Lord has saved you now. Right? You've been given the second chance, as it were. You're seeing the details. You're starting to really appreciate the beauty and living it again. What was that process of really coming back to a place of joy? What does cultivating joy look like for you in that period post as you were walking with the Lord, reading the word?

[Juice]

My father, like I said, I was in that two year isolation and in that time it was. We're having service every single night, me and my dad. Not because we wanted to, because if like even me, I as much as I have a degree in chemistry, but I'm not diagnosed. But I think I'm dyslexic and I think I have adhd. But like, you know, I go self diagnose myself. But I've always struggled with reading. So like, even when it came to like getting my degree, it's only because I was good at labs. So it was the labs that helped me understand the theories because reading and like I've never, the only book I've ever really fully read was, is the Bible. Truly, it's not my bag, not my bag at all. And I used to really get upset when my dad would force the Bible on me because I'm like, but that's how you know, your spirit is disrupted because like the hymns and it used to really like irritate me. Like I'm talking. I would get so upset to the point where like there was one time like I punched holes through the wall. Like the woman y'all see today, wow. She, she, she. Listen, she about to say she wasn't.

[Courtney]

Your spirit, so unsettled, so unsettled.

[Juice]

Like, like, turn that off, turn that off.

[Renee]

Why is it so loud?

[Courtney]

Actually so funny.

[Renee]

You know that so deep.

[Juice]

No, which actually ridiculous. No, because it was really like, it was also that convicting power. Right? Because mind you, like I said, I grew up in the church and when I. Obviously my story is like a two part redemption and we came back and then we left it and we came back again and but in them times, you know, we was in the straight, you know, we, we, we, we live in holy and sanctified now. But she was, she was outside, you know, she was outside. Okay, literally. Okay, shout out to the old Westbury crew because we was literally outside. It was, it was a moment, I'm not going to say a time, but it was a moment. And so a lot of. A lot of the things that the Lord was pulling out with me were obviously not just things that I came into covenant with on my own, but there were a lot of things that, since the age of seven, again, these weren't things I chose. So there are things that are attaching itself to me that I did not choose this, right? So now it's like, why do I gotta fight against something that I didn't even choose, that I was just there in reality. It's your fault, Daddy. How about that? Like, so there was a lot of things that, like, happened in that moment. And I really think the biggest gift that the Lord gave me was that time to be at my father's feet because he had his own thing that he was going through as well. But my dad was a who. That man was a scholar. He was a theologian in his own right. Like, he. He always. He. We had a conversation once, and he called himself a dwarf star. And how. Because what a dwarf star is, is a star that never becomes a full star, but it's actually small, but it lasts longer than any other kind of star, right? And when he. When he described himself that way, I sat and I talked to him. I told him, I said, well, a dwarf star is still a star. And the mass of that star, like our universe, has a particular mass, right? And it's necessary to have that mass for the universe to function. So if that mass didn't exist, the whole universe would be disrupted. And like, he always. It's gonna make me emotional. He always thought of himself as a failure. But, like, he doesn't recognize that his. His, I think, only mission in this life was to prepare me and my sister the way that he did. Because the level of biblical knowledge and understanding, you can't pay for that. The way to be able to dissect the Word and see science in the Word, to be able to see history in the Word, to be able to see sociology in the Word and look at it from those different lines. Like, it really. Seeing how he didn't enjoy just the simplicity of being able to just teach me is really what has really shaped me. And seeing the joy in everything. Because just if this was the only conversation that we had, but it saved one life, then praise the Lord for that, because that means I can. I can go to my father happy and hear, well done, my good and faithful servant. Because the one soul that I was supposed to touch, I touched. You know, so it's really understanding that my. I coming to the understanding that my Life is not my own. And the fact that I have the privilege. Like, I died that day, the day. The day I decided I wanted to commit suicide, I died that day. And I truly believe what Paul says when he says, it's not I who lives, but Christ who lives in me. Because how can I not say yes to the one who not only saw me when I was dirt, but after he washed me, I decided to spit in his face again. And yet he still saw me worth it and has brought me to this place where now he can see me fit to be able to inspire someone with a laugh and joy. And that's a privilege. It's an honor. And it's like, how can I not be joyful? How can I not feel, like, complete? You know, like, yeah, there are things, you know, you want and things. But all of these things genuinely don't matter. Like. And that's what I mean. Like, when you really, really get to see the Lord, not see his hand, a lot of people only see his hand. I've seen the face of God, and that is the joy that I carry. Because through that time, recognizing that now looking back, he was preparing me for this. Because how can. How can you just pick up and move? And I was grieving all year while I was here in London by myself. No plan, no nothing. There was no plan. But it was because I knew I wasn't by myself. I was alone, but I was. I was surrounded and I was led and I was. And I'm continuing that. So, yeah, sorry, guys.

[Courtney]

No, don't apologize. Don't apologize. Like, it's funny because earlier today we were talking about whether I'm a crap, a crier or not, which I'm not.

[Renee]

She has to qualify every time. She's not a crier.

[Courtney]

Yeah, but I'm not.

[Renee]

No, no, she has to qualify that she.

[Courtney]

It's not really a qualifying thing if it's the fact. So I'm not really a cry.

[Juice]

Do you get what I'm saying?

[Courtney]

However, I'm just saying in the sense of. I really felt myself welling up when you said that, because I think there is something that if. If anyone has ever tried to take their own life that they can attest to, which is a part of you does die even if your suicide attempt was not successful. Right? A part of you does die in that moment, which is the part of you that really wanted to go. And now you're left with the part of you that kind of wants to live and having to find that hope in. Okay, I've got life by the grace of God. But what does living actually look like?

[Juice]

Yeah, right.

[Courtney]

Like living without. Maybe living with the grief or living without the grief. What does that look like? And I think that so perfectly encapsulates what that kind of before and after life looks like, which is all the pain hasn't necessarily lifted. I'm actually still walking around with the sorrow, but I can also see joy in the sorrow. Right. But I do want to kind of circle back to your story now. So we're here, and God has said, move to London because your man is there. Now, one thing I will say, the sisters may think you crazy, because moving to another city for our man that may or may.

[Renee]

May not actually exist just yet.

[Juice]

What?

[Courtney]

Amen.

[Juice]

Let's. Let's be guided.

[Courtney]

Let's be serious. So guide us through that. Honestly, because. No, no, I'm being so serious. Yeah. Because I don't know if you guys saw the recent UK Love is Blind. Obviously, people have been talking about one of the ladies that's on there who I actually know because we went to Saint Uni. She's actually a lovely soul. I will say that I ain't gonna drag nobody's name through the mug. Who is a real sister, real friend.

[Juice]

Most recent.

[Courtney]

Yeah, she wasn't like, yeah, we'll talk about it.

[Renee]

Okay.

[Courtney]

She was getting. She was getting, you know, a lot of social commentary around the fact that she had left her profession to pursue, you know, maybe finding a partner on the show or just finding a partner in general. And people were like, why would you.

[Juice]

Do that for a man?

[Courtney]

And I think it. It brings that radical. It brings up a conversation around doing something radical, which is in the pursuit of maybe marriage or romantic love interest, picking up and shifting your whole life as you did to a whole new city or just doing something drastic. And I know it ruffles a couple people's feathers because they're like, is giving doing too much? However, in your case, it's giving obedience.

[Juice]

Right.

[Courtney]

So walk us through the mindset and the. What. What's the internal dialogue that's happening, Happening when God tells you, I know you didn't want marriage before, but I might have a mare for you, and he's in London, so pack your bags and go.

[Juice]

Yeah. Well, I will say, I didn't move to London for no rinky dink, man. I moved to London for the man named Jesus.

[Courtney]

Okay.

[Juice]

That's the man I moved to. That'll do it. Okay. He said, come. I said, okay, I'm coming. Running. That'll do it. You know, when my. My mama tell me to come, I'm coming.

[Renee]

Okay.

[Courtney]

Love it.

[Juice]

So that process for me. So there's. There's. There's certain things that I cannot say. Okay. Just to put it out there. So there's a level of understanding and knowledge that I've had, which is where everybody want to be knowing, want to know. Trust me, you don't. I promise. You don't want to know. You don't want to have any knowledge of nothing. Because if it's from the Lord, I promise you, it would scare the living crap out of you. It wouldn't be, oh, my God, I'm so. It would terrify you. So, yeah, there's been. There was a level of understanding of an idea of a potential. And I'm like, lord, same thing. Yeah. I'm not finna do all of this for what's the vibe. What's the. What's going on for me. In my story, the Lord has never said, this is the one. Right? But there has been this feeling now, remember, because of everything I experienced, the one thing that I lost as a woman was the ability to feel. So even in the moments where I was able to feel anxiety in my body, I didn't realize that was a privilege because I never felt that before. And it was overwhelming because I never felt that before. Right, Right. So, yeah, when. When the Lord let me know that, like, put this in, I was like, I said, I was praying, I was praying, I was seeking, and the feeling just got stronger and stronger and stronger. That's why I said I felt like I didn't. I knew it wasn't the enemy, but I'm like, must. Maybe it's my flesh, right? But I wasn't going to dare say it was the enemy because I. My sheep know my voice. I know my father's voice, that's for sure. So I said, okay, Lord, if this is where you're trying to take me, I need you to make me the woman of God that I need to be for this man. And he told me, well, I need you to learn how to be a woman first. And I said, I'm not going to say that that was rude. I literally said it like that. I'm not going to say that that was rude, but that was a little. That was a little merge. What do you mean? So from there, he gave me the book of Esther. But really breaking it down in the understanding of. We always talk about Esther and the favor that she received because of her beauty and sin. And there what it was is that she was a woman of value to the kingdom. The king saw her as an equal in the work that he was doing. So when she barges in, it was as though he was barging in because it's like, this must be an emergency. Because if it was an emergency, I would be barging in as well. Right? There was a level of trust, trust that she gained. That was the favor, right? Because she already proved herself. She showed herself to be worth that. So the Lord has, you know, really shaped. So when I got the first initial feeling in the moment, like I said, to this day, the Lord hasn't said, this is the one. It's again this feeling. But that feeling has continuously led me through a path. Now when I'm looking back, I'm like, okay, that was the Holy Spirit. Because like the word says, you won't know the prophet is true unless the word comes to pass. Right? So.

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[Renee]

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[Juice]

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[Juice]

Everything up until this point has pointed in this one direction. However, we are currently in a point. When it comes out, if it, if it comes out to be, this is what it is. I promise you we're going to clip this. And this will have to be in my wedding. My wedding.

[Courtney]

Yeah.

[Juice]

Because if you guys were to know what the full situation is, I promise you would be like, there's absolutely no way. The Lord has. Recently I've told you guys about my current situation, but part of that is again, within that span of three days, I've Lost everything that. The. The idea of everything that the Lord had said to me, all of it. I'm in the. I'm in the complete dark at this point. But the Lord had prepared me prior to all that happening in how he was talking to me and how he was kind of just like, preparing me mentally putting me in a place where I would be safe and all these other things. But, yeah, I feel like there's a. We cannot discount people's experiences when they say, I heard God say this or I heard God say that. Right. But I think what especially women need to remember and understand is you have to first be in a position and always maintain that position of, am I making marriage an idol? Right. Who is it that my heart is actually after? Is it after this man or is it after the Lord? Right? And I think too often we fall in the first part where it's after the man. And like I said, even after the Lord gave me this desire for marriage, there was a point where it's like, the man, the idea did become an idol. Because again, it's like, I didn't know that love could actually be a thing for me. I didn't know. Like, I didn't know that this could be a reality for me. And there could really be someone who actually treats my body and treats my person as. With honor, like, you know, how it should be. And that idea of having that is like, whoa. But then the Lord had to reel me back and re. Center me and say, hey, hey, just before you forget, it's me and me alone. Which is now kind of why we're in the situation that we're in now, where the Lord had to go to the extremes to now really remove this person out of the picture. And like I said, when you guys. I'm telling you this now, y'all know my story. The Holy Spirit, okay, confirms when his spirit is in the place. The Lord knows I'm not lying.

[Courtney]

Okay?

[Juice]

So if. If this gets to be my testimony for real, then you would be like, wow, yeah, this was really. Only God could have done it. Because even me, I'm like, lord, I'm trying to tell you, I want no parts of this. I want no parts of this. But even when you have my mom, who wasn't for this at all, my friends who were like, you're insane. Now, they're the ones holding my faith, talking about, no, there has. This has to be. What do you mean, guys? This was the evidence that it's not for you guys to hop on the bandwagon. It's true. I was just insane. It's okay. But it's like, no. And again, because remember, the triage was your husband. London Entertainment. He never said a name. So at the end of the day, people have to make a choice. Saul was anointed king. He didn't. He decided to not wait on the Lord. Right. So David was the one. Because he already knew Saul was not going to make the mark. So now the Lord has put me in a position where I've told you, a husband at the end of the day, what. What package my love comes in doesn't matter. The best part about it is that you already have my love right now. So you. It's not like you lose. You're not losing anything. Right. Because I think we tend to forget that at the end of the day, the promise of receiving the love of God is there. You have access to it. You don't need another person to receive that. Right. Like, he does it so you can see a certain aspect of him. However, me being able to even let that go has allowed me to see my friendships and see how, wow. The greatest love stories that I'm experiencing aren't the ones that I'm going to meet at the altar. It's actually the ones I'm experiencing right now.

[Renee]

Yeah.

[Courtney]

On the money. And I love that you touched on that. Because a lot of times people are ready to make radical moves for a partner because the partner is an idol. But when the radical mood is linked to an obedience, it's because you love God. You actually love him. And you know that he is what you are ultimately pursuing. You're not pursuing a man. You're pursuing Christ. And on that journey, the man will come. Right? And I love what you said about Esther, because I think in this world of grappling with our womanhood, discovering our femininity, for a lot of people, healing that part of us, that feminine side of us, a lot of the way the world spins, it is. You can then make femininity an idol. You can make femininity the ultimate goal. And I love that you said no. Femininity is about discovering who God is and becoming more like him. Right. If you want to be the woman of God that you've been called to be, not only are you repairing your womanhood, you realize that your womanhood is a reflection of the one who created you as a woman. And you also have to discover the God of the woman. You're not just the woman of God. You need to discover the God of the woman. Right. And so really realizing that in this whole journey of becoming who my future husband may need me to be, but also healing the parts of me that have been fractured in the femininity that may have been robbed from me, everything has the same answer, which is, I need to go back to the foot of Jesus and be like, hey, God, you're the Lord of my life. Change me and make me into who you want me to be. And that is the display of obedience. And that is the heart. Heart posture we're to have no matter what we're pursuing and no matter where he places us as well. So thank you for teasing that out.

[Renee]

Yeah. No, that was such a sobering thought as well. Actually, it really sobering in the sense of. It really made me think of a compass.

[Juice]

Right.

[Renee]

You're like one degree off, and you continue on that direction, and soon enough you will find yourself miles and miles and miles away from where you intended to go. And it really reminded me of the importance of recalibrating celebration.

[Courtney]

Yes.

[Renee]

Every now and again.

[Juice]

Right.

[Renee]

Because it was so easy for you to hear initially the voice of God. And you have that initial step of obedience. And all the while you're thinking, right, I am on this mission of finding my future husband. I'm on this mission of pursuing God. Not realizing you have made a God of that pursuit of the thing that God has promised you.

[Courtney]

Yeah.

[Renee]

So the importance of actually recalibrating yourself every now and again, especially when you. You act on that initial obedience is so important. It's obedience as an actual lifestyle as opposed to something that you do in initial moments or in. At the beginning of a journey. Obedience is actually something that you have to continue to do to be able to be close to God, to be able to see the true fulfillment of his desires and his promises for you and seeing that as more of a relationship.

[Juice]

And this is.

[Renee]

Obedience is a relationship.

[Juice]

It's really. It's really. It's really that. What does. I mean, Christ is himself. If you love me, obey my word.

[Renee]

Exactly Right.

[Juice]

And that. It sounds so strong. Obey my word. Right. But we tend to think that this whole love thing when it comes to the Lord is unconditional. He loves you despite your condition. But to fall in love with him. There are conditions as much as you with any other person. Right. He's like, here are my boundaries. Conditions are just boundaries. These are my boundaries. These are the things that I like. These are the things I don't like. If you want to be in relationship with me, this is. This is where we got to stay. Right. And I love what you talked about in terms of the recalibration because when we talk about our journey with Christ, our walk with Christ, we always think it's a growth journey, like we're climbing up a mountain. I like to think of it as a scale, right? You're always either on this end of the scale spectrum or that end of the spectrum. And the goal is to stay in the middle, right? Because Christ is the center of it all. So you can be really showing the fruit of the spirit, you're really on it. And then like you said, you, you kind of shift this way, shift this way a little bit and then, okay, something happens and it actually just pushes you straight over this way. But then the goal is to always, you know, like one of. What are those, you know, those, those little like, like on the scales, like.

[Renee]

The manual scales, when they like there.

[Courtney]

Get you into the middle 100%. Get you in alignment about being in alignment. That is so powerful. So now you're in London, you picked up your bags, you're grieving, you're grieving your father, right? You picked up your bag and now you're in London. But girl, this ain't the land of roses, honey and milk. It's cold, it's cold. And the men ain't really. It's interesting. It's an interesting place. An interesting place. You know, the dating scene in London is not. I wouldn't recommend for the sisters to pick up their bags.

[Renee]

And cuz I hear that a lot.

[Juice]

Of American girls are like, oh, let's go to London.

[Courtney]

And the London girls are like, I need to go to the States and.

[Juice]

You don't want to find my man. Listen, this is a worldwide issue. This is the world pandemic. This is the real. And the thing is every.

[Renee]

Everybody says, oh, there's issues where we're from. Tell us where to go.

[Courtney]

Like there's literally issues everywhere.

[Juice]

There's really issues everywhere.

[Courtney]

There's issues everywhere. That's the thing you can't escape. So find the Lord where literally wherever you are, literally wherever you are, find the Lord in that place, right? So now you're in London and obviously you've been here for a couple years now, but back and forth, back and forth, there we go.

[Renee]

Yeah, back and forth.

[Courtney]

But you haven't gotten married just yet. So that means you've been in a season of waiting, right? And following God's instruction here and there, do this, do that. And also growing your career, let's not ignore that. But growing your career and genuinely the growth in this time that we have seen from you. Fantastic. Like God brought you to London and put you on the map. Yeah, he literally brought you here and put you on the map. But talk to us about what the waiting season looks like and talk to us about waiting.

[Juice]

Well, well, I think waiting. Well, well, the waiting season, child, it really is what you make it, right? Like when you order something from online, you've paid, you've gotten the receipt, you've gotten the tracking number, it's on the way, right? You can either be staring at your phone all day till Thursday even though it told you it's coming on Thursday, or you could just go about your day, go about your business. And I think I've experienced both of those experiences since being here. I guess in a weird way, because my mind was, I was. Realistically, I'm not thinking about no man, I'm not thinking about none of that at all. Because like, even, even during that time while my father was, you know, passing, the Lord's asking me, what do I want for my wedding. I'm like, to dance with my dad at my wedding. That's what I want. He asked me three times and I said, he said, I didn't ask you that. I said, so what's. What are you, what are you trying to ask me right now? Because just, I don't want to have this conversation. So now when I'm here, I'm more. Reality is I'm more preoccupied with where am I going to stay. Guys, I'm telling you, there was no plan. Yeah, okay. As in pick up, come. I don't even know where I'm going to stay. I only booked the Airbnb for two days. But again, when the Lord has placed you in a place. The day I got here three days later, I met the girl that I would be staying with.

[Courtney]

Wow.

[Juice]

Like, never done. You know, I wasn't doing social media like that or crazy. When I was in the States, my career really started here. I was at 6k on IG the day I'm landing again from off of one video, I meet the girl that ended up giving me the place where I'm renting. I'm on a radio show three days after I land in London, Lincoln went Room 187 shout outs to Room 187 to do content with them. Amazing. So it's just like, yeah, off the rip. The Lord was already showing me, like this is what it means when, when I tell you to do something and you do it right. So my whole Waiting for the first part was really just. I was in this new space. Like I said, I was grieving, but even the grieving aspect of it, I didn't really feel it. You know, you have the scripture of we don't work, grieve as the world grieves. I didn't understand that until I've gone going through it, right? And it was beautiful because even everyone. Oh, how do you get all these ideas? And da, da, da. The Lord gives me the script, I see the video, I get the idea. He bullet points for me. I record it. Boom. Millions of views. I don't. I wish I could tell you it was me. Like, I'm not gonna sit here and say I'm taking credit for it. Oh, but you're creative. No, I know when it's me, and I know when it's outside of me. And I'm at the point where now me is the same as outside of me, like. Cause we're just one. So I don't take credit for anything. Anything that I do, anything that I see. Even when I drop a bar here, too. That's the Holy Spirit, right? Like, me. Me and my bae, we won. Okay. Like, that's my man. Like, we really won. We really won. So when you see me see him, just know you see him. When you see him, just know you see me.

[Courtney]

And that's him with the capital H. Hello.

[Juice]

Hello, big him.

[Courtney]

There we go.

[Juice]

Stop playing what I said before. I'm seeing to his heat.

[Courtney]

Stop playing with me.

[Juice]

So the waiting for me has really been. I mean, it's. I thought I knew God before. My relationship with Christ didn't stop. Start until the day my father died. That he told me when. When, you know, we got the call that he had passed. He said, don't worry about what you see. Think about the new. In three days, you'll see my glory. Three days later is when we buried him. Mind you, my father actually preached at his own funeral because we had a recording that we did months before and that the Lord had felt for us to do. We never put it out. And that was what we used to actually have him preach at his own funeral. From that day, I have not stopped seeing the glory of the Lord.

[Renee]

Jesus.

[Juice]

So sorry. Like Jesus, I'm telling you. I'm telling you. Yeah. And it. Well, I think. I think the. Why the waiting for me is so important, not just for my own self, because I know there are people attached to this. The. The thing that the Lord has really made me understand, especially in these last couple months is the fact that whether it was my disobedience, whether it was my obedience, there have been people who have been impacted by that. Right. And the fact that I have the privilege to be able to be an example for what it means to wait on the Lord, not out of obligation, but because I love Him. Like, too often we're so busy wanting to do things because we know we're going to get from God. That's surface level. Like, I'm at the point in my walk with him where, like I said, we really are one. Like, I want to feel his butterflies. I want to. I want to know that he smiles like when the sun shines. I want to in my head think it's because he's happy that I woke up today. Like, that's my, like, you know, like, like, are you happy to see me? I'm happy to see you too. Like, that's, that's, that's like, that's just, that's just the level in the depth of, of why it's important for me. Because again, the Lord has definitely used this man as an anchor for me, to keep me. Because child, me and my old ways wanted to come back out. Like self sabotage. Not because I really want to do that, but because again, I'm grieving, I'm trying, I'm in a new place. I'm like, you know, like, you know, I'm trying to figure things out. But the Lord definitely used that man as a, as a, as an invisible anchor to like, remember, even if it's. And I think that's one of the things in terms of the weight that has, that has really shown me I'm not just doing this for the Lord, but I'm doing it because I do love the man who will be my husband, whoever he is. I want to honor that relationship. And I've never fought for anything before for in my life, right? And the Lord used him. Like I said. I said, if this is the word we're going to go, then Lord, make me into the woman of God. I need to be. So the fact that the Lord has actually done that is like, lord, you know, we need to go tit for tat. Since you've done this for me, how can I not do this for you? You know? So that's what he did.

[Courtney]

Jeez.

[Renee]

I just, I love that you've really taken seriously this partnership element with God. Like, it really sounds like God is a partner in your plans, a partner in your day. Like, he really is Lord of your life. He's the head man and seeing that an example because oftentimes it can be so contextual, it can be so, so much based on our environment, based on our emotions. But you've really said, lord, I'm going to partner with you. Everything, even around creativity, entertainment industry, etc. I think we often compartmentalize a lot of these things that we do. Not realizing that the God that creates can create with me. Like the God that literally created the whole universe is the person that I'm going to partner with to create, to reach his people. It makes sense when you say it out loud, but it's something that we often take for granted. So that's such a beautiful thing and such a beautiful element of your story. Yeah, we've spoken obviously about Anchorman, we'll call him Anchorman. Anchorman, you know, and you've spoken a little bit about the different waiting experiences that you've had right from the standing at the door waiting for the delivery to come to, you know, pretty much getting on with it, enjoying the rest of your day, whatnot. And I think as part of that latter piece of enjoying the rest of your day and really getting stuck into the present as it were, having community, having people around you, making friends, especially in a new city, is really, really, really tough. I remember the one year that I was in the States, boy, I was lamenting, I was like, where's? I was literally on the phone to my friends, I'll be like, courtney, help me. Or like whoever helped me. I'm literally dying out here because it's such a big thing to move and have all of your support systems now be far, far behind you, thinking about things like time zone differences, the practicalities of life and especially as an adult, we are literally in different cycles, in different spaces. So talk, talk to us a little bit about that process and that journey of making new friends, forging new connections, building a community in somewhere like London, which doesn't always have the best kind of reputation for community building. It's dark, it's cold. We are low on the happiness here. I think we like second figure this out.

[Juice]

Like, please figure that out. Like, come on guys.

[Courtney]

We will.

[Renee]

Well, we're trying. Have patience with us. Wait on us, please.

[Juice]

You know what?

[Renee]

Have, have faith.

[Juice]

I, I, I will. But yeah, I like every other aspect of my life is going to sound crazy and I'm sorry. I would, I would say sorry, but it's not Sorry the Lord, literally, I, when somebody hits me up, I pray, Lord, should I answer this message? If, if I feel led to like Speak to someone. Lord, give me. Should I. He says gives me the go ahead. Or sometimes he does, he gives me the no head. Okay, so like please stop. So, and have I, have I always gotten it right? No, but he's always given grace for when it's time to exit stage left to do so. But I think, I think the hardest part about trying to make friends is really less about if there are people available to them and really more about are you willing to be available for them. Because you have to be open to being open. Like, you have to be like, there is no way for you to be able to meet new people without doing that. And I think because so many people have. I feel like some of the biggest heartbreaks that the world experiences are through friendships. It's like parents first and then your friends. And because people want to deny themselves of the fact that they were hurt by a person. Oh no, you know what? I ain't even bothered by that. Like stay is what it is. And you just cut them out and blah blah, blah, blah, blah. Like you. Because you're denying the fact that that's how you felt. Now you're going into every relationship with your guard up thinking, you know what? I'm not going to, I'm not gonna. Because I'm like, you have to be like, that's what love is all about. It's about taking a risk. This could work. This could not work. But you have to understand and have the self awareness to know how they act or react to me is not a reflection of me, it's just an opinion of theirs. And they're so entitled to have that opinion as much as I'm entitled to have mine. Right? And I think we're too sensitive these days about how people view us and perceive us. That we've given too much power to other people as opposed to realizing like this is an exchange. And on top of that we have levels to this. It may happen quickly, but it should happen in order. Right. Too many times we're skipping the order of things. Like, like, you have to allow like one of the things I love shout outs to Tiana. Like girl Tiana Oromi, go ahead and follow her. Okay. Cuz she a woman. A woman, A woman, okay. In every aspect of the word. I think the thing I love about our relationship, besides the fact that the Lord is the one who genuinely put us together and like he made it very clear that he's the one who's putting us together. But one of the ways that he showed us that he's the one who put it. Put it together is because it happened quickly, but it was so orderly. Like, we weren't sharing too much too fast. We weren't, you know, all bestie, bestie from the. Like, it was a slow, quick burn. It wasn't rushed. Like, there's an issue when things are rushed, you know, And. And. And I think that just goes to any type of relationship, whether you're talking about friendship, whether you're talking about in the workplace, whether you're talking, like. And I think that's the beautiful thing about what I've learned in terms of relationships in general. And to be honest, I think the way that even intimacy, like, in the bedroom has been over the last few years and how it's portrayed and how we perceive that has really tainted how we just view relationships in general, because we have a perverse version of what intimacy looks like and what it should be, whether it's through Hollywood, whether it's through this demonic oppression of pornography. Like, listen, so we are all distorted when it comes to what intimacy looks like. And even me, when it comes to, like, looking at the princesses and Hollywood. And that's not real life. There's hoops and there's loops. Fairy tales have a fairy tale ending. I don't want a fairy until ending. I don't want to live happily ever after. I want to. I want it to always be a happy beginning. Every day is new, right? And I think that's the beautiful thing that I'm experiencing with. With my friends. Not just Tiana, but even my. My best friend from home who, like, you know, we've known each other since uni, but, like, the depth of our relationship has grown so much because realistically, it's me. She's always been there. And that's one of the things that's always made me, like, love her, is the fact that whether I was emotionally available or not, she's never left my side. And the fact that now I'm emotionally available and, like, okay, like, I'm here. Like, I'm affectionate. But it's one thing when you. You let them in, but then let them in. You know what I mean? And I've always been the person where you're gonna feel like, I'm your best friend in the world. For me, you're just another face. That's how it used to be. For me, it was so damaging again, of course, because of the things I've experienced. But praise the Lord that he's healed me from that and given me the grace to Be able to like, feel that and not be afraid to feel pain. Because again, if I can feel pain, if I can feel love, I can feel. And that is where the miracle lies.

[Courtney]

You know, for me, that is wonderful. Honestly, like Proverbs says, if you want friends, prove yourself friendly.

[Renee]

Friendly.

[Courtney]

It's there. Simply prove yourself friendly. And honestly, you are one of the most friendliest people. I remember when I first met you, I was like, I want that girl to be my friend.

[Juice]

Facts.

[Courtney]

Honestly, you are a blessing. And thank you so much for illustrating friendship with God, partnership with God, and covenant with God as well. I think we as a generation, especially like you, highlighted romance and novels and Disney princess films, but also pornography has a way of portraying what intimacy, relationship, covenant looks like or should look like. But actually with the Lord, it's realer. It's way realer, way more complex. But I think what you've illustrated is the same way we put all our energy and our sacrifice into finding that one Mr. Right. We already have a Mr. Right. He's the right one.

[Juice]

Okay? He's the right one. And we also, like, stop neglecting the people around you. Yeah, like fix the relationship with your mom, fix the relationship with your dad. Just fix it.

[Renee]

I'm waiting for Mr. Right to have the right temple relationship.

[Courtney]

We always do that. Like when I have my family, when I get married, then things will be okay. That's when I'll have the most healed version of a relationship. When actually you can heal the ones that are broken. Literally, you can heal the ones that are fractured right now. And there is great joy in that as well. And so just thank you, thank you for being a living testament of what it looks like to walk with God in partnership. And honestly, we are so excited for the way the journey will unfold and how your story is being written. And we know that God already knows it. And so it's going to be a good one.

[Renee]

Cuz he wrote it.

[Courtney]

Yes, sir. So before you leave here, disappear, we need you to drop some wisdom for the sisters. Starting with two. My sisters. You already know the deal. You're actually a fan of.

[Renee]

There you go.

[Juice]

To my sisters. I want you to remember that the same God who called you and formed you is the same God who knows you and wants you. Never let that go over your head. Remember who you are and remember whose you are. Because what's inside of you is much bigger than you. And it's not just for you. Plant that seed in your heart, let it flourish. Get the fruit and then squeeze it and let Yourself be squeezed so. So that that same seed can now be planted to someone else and the juice can be enjoyed.

[Courtney]

Oh, sorry. That was too much energy.

[Renee]

You said.

[Courtney]

I said.

[Renee]

I knew she's gonna say something about juice.

[Juice]

We was waiting on it. No, I always gotta go there. We was at the door waiting for the juice.

[Courtney]

Thank you.

[Renee]

We were 30 yesterday, and you gave us. You gave us something to purchase.

[Courtney]

Wow. Wow, wow, wow, wow.

[Renee]

Yes. Before we do go, lady, we have to send you off with just a little bit of a covering.

[Courtney]

We have.

[Juice]

Just because you know me. Listen, there's. There's. There's an annoying. Listen, you have to stop. There is. The Lord knew not to send me here until the grace could be passed on. Amen.

[Renee]

Here.

[Juice]

And this is a lot of grace.

[Courtney]

Hallelujah.

[Juice]

I receive especially. And if y'all could see all the production that's going on here, again, it's all the grace. So the Lord knew.

[Courtney]

Come on.

[Juice]

So I come and I receive. The word says, if you receive the prophet as a prophet, then you receive the blessing of the prophet, and therefore I receive it.

[Courtney]

But we love you nonetheless. Father, we thank you, thank you for the gathering of us as your daughters, as sisters, and as women who you have called to belong to you. Father, we just thank you for this time we've had to fellowship with one another in friendship. We thank you for the life of juice. Thank you so much for bringing her to the UK so that we could enjoy this woman, so that we could really partake in what you are doing in her life. And, Father, we just thank you that it has been a journey of obedience, a journey of trust, and a continual journey of just desiring you. And, Father, we pray for Juice that as she is continuing on this journey, you would reveal yourself to her, align her with your will. May she meet those who you have ordained to walk with her in this season of her life and beyond. We pray, oh, Lord, that whatever her heart desires that is in a place according to your will, you will give to her. But you are a God who gives good things to his children. We just thank you, Lord, that you are with her even in times of struggle, even in times of pain, even in the things that we do not see and the things that lie behind the laughter, we know that you are there, you see it, and, Lord, you will touch it. We just pray, oh, Lord, that you would help her to know that your presence is near. That, Lord, you truly are the one who blesses and adds no sorrow. We pray in the name of Jesus, that every Good blessing shall be hers. In the name of Jesus and Father, we just commit her career into your hands. We say, oh Lord, as you have put juice on the map, continue to enlarge her territory. We pray, oh Lord, that you will continue to take her from glory to glory. That, Father, you shall have your way through her gifts and through her talents, oh God, and through every platform which you have given her, oh Lord, may your gospel be shared. May your joy be spread. May she continue to be connected with the right people. May you, o Lord, set her content before the right eyes. And Father, we just pray that there would be an exponential blessing that comes upon Jesus even in the next year. Lord, we know that we shall see you do a mighty thing. Father God, we commit her future marriage into your hands. We say, oh Lord, may it truly be a joyful testimony. May this man come straight from the.

[Renee]

Throne room to her.

[Courtney]

And Father, we pray in the name of Jesus that it will not cause people to idolize marriage or idolize her, but it will cause men to put their hearts at your feet and say, above all, I want Jesus. We pray these things in the name of the most blessed and righteous God, our Father. In Jesus name we pray.

[Juice]

Amen. Like Lord Oily and I just want to say, listen, May the Lord reach richly, richly continue to bless the two of you, continue to be in the midst of your friendship, to be in the midst of your. Your new stage of life. And genuinely, may he continue to grow this ministry of sisterhood that you are building. Because you guys know, but genuinely, it is a privilege to know you. I love you ladies so much, and I'm how grateful that you guys have allowed me to be able to not just be here, but to be here always. I love y'all so much.

[Courtney]

We love you.

[Renee]

We love you, we love you. Well, unfortunately, we have in fact come to the end of the episode. Time is so fast spent. And it has been a honor and a privilege to receive you today. And long may it continue. Hey, you might see Juice come back, but until she comes back, make sure you follow all her social media platforms. Literally, just Juice, everything. Please go and find out.

[Courtney]

And if you need a host, if you need a presenter, if you need somebody to come and lift up the vibes, hit me up.

[Renee]

Our girl Book Juice Enforcement Commission. We'll be expecting a small commission.

[Courtney]

Absolutely, absolutely.

[Renee]

Just let us know. And also please don't book her when we've booked her.

[Courtney]

So just thank you very much. Keep our dates.

[Renee]

So please follow Juice on everything. You can also follow everything to my sisters at to my sisterhood. You already know the drill on Tik Tok, Instagram, all the social media platforms. We are there. And of course you can come and follow us individually, my lovely bestie over here at CD Botting. And you can can come and follow me over at Renee Kapuku for sure.

[Courtney]

Sisters, we love you so much and you know you're going to see us in the next episode. Four years of consistency. We will never leave you out. So until next time, keep glowing and.

[Juice]

Growing and don't forget to be flowing.

[Eugenio Derves]

To get people excited about Boost Mobile's new nationwide 5G network, we're offering unlimited talk, text and data for $25 a month.

[Juice]

Forever.

[Eugenio Derves]

Even if you have a baby.

[Juice]

Even if your baby has a baby.

[Eugenio Derves]

Even if you grow old and wrinkly and you start repeating yourself, even if you start repeating yourself, even if you're on your deathbed and you need to make one last call or text, right? Or text the long lost son you abandoned at birth, you'll still get unlimited.

[Juice]

Talk, text and Data for just $25 a month.

[Eugenio Derves]

With Boost Mobile Forever, after 30 gigabytes, customers may experience slower speeds. Customers will pay $25 a month as long as they remain active on the Boost Unlimited plan forever.