Podcast Summary: Todo Concostrina

Episode: Acontece que no es poco | Cómo liarla parda con 95 tesis

Host: Nieves Concostrina
Guest/Co-host: Carla
Date: October 31, 2022

Overview

In this episode of Acontece que no es poco, Nieves Concostrina brings her signature wit and irreverence to dissect one of the pivotal events in Christian history: the origins of the Protestant Reformation sparked by Martin Luther's 95 Theses. The conversation debunks popular myths surrounding the dramatic narrative of Luther nailing his challenges to a church door, examines the deep-rooted corruption and commercialization within the Church at the time, and explores how the newly invented printing press supercharged the proliferation of revolutionary ideas.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

The Power of Religious Conflict

• Opening Reflection: Carla and Nieves banter about which children’s characters they’d like to be, using it as a playful segue to introduce the theme: religious disputes are the most intense and consequential.
  • "No hay peores disputas que las familiares, no hay peores guerras que las civiles y no hay peores broncas que las religiosas.” — Carla (00:42)

The Myth vs. The Reality: Luther and the 95 Theses

• The Popular Story: Nieves narrates the epic—if fictionalized—tale of Luther striding up to the church in Wittenberg, nailing his parchment of 95 Theses to the door, sparking an immediate uproar.
  • “Un monje muy cabreado agarró un martillo y unos clavos... lo clavó en la puerta de la iglesia.” — Nieves (01:29)
• The Historical Reality: Research suggests the famous door-nailing never happened. Rather, Luther sent his theses, written in Latin, to the Archbishop of Mainz to initiate a scholarly debate.
  • “No hay testigos de la clavada del cartel. Ni siquiera el propio Lutero lo escribió.” — Nieves (04:38)
  • The supposed act was later staged and emphasized for dramatic and symbolic effect.

Why Latin? Who Was Supposed to Read This?

• Linguistic Detail: The theses were composed in Latin, not in German, showing they were intended for a scholarly audience, not lay parishioners.
  • “Allí no hablaba latín ni Dios… El latín sólo lo hablaban los que estudiaban teología, no la gente de a pie.” — Nieves (04:38)

The Role of the Printing Press

• Dissemination and Impact: The printing press, recently invented, enabled the rapid spread of Luther’s theses—now translated into vernacular languages—far beyond the intended circle of theologians.
  • “Gracias a una cosa peligrosísima… la imprenta.” — Nieves (06:51)
  • It was only after losing control of the narrative that Church authorities took Luther’s rebellion seriously.

Indulgences: The Business of Forgiveness

• Explaining Indulgences: Indulgences were essentially ‘get out of hell’ cards sold by the Church, leveraging fear of death and the afterlife.
  • “El timo consistía en meter miedo a la gente con la muerte, el infierno y el purgatorio… [y] les vendías unos papelitos que les borraban los pecados.” — Nieves (09:35)
• Corruption at Every Level: Local archbishops, needing to pay debts, actively promoted the sale of indulgences. The proceeds funded everything from personal debts to the construction of St. Peter’s Basilica.
  • “El arzobispo… le compró el cargo al Papa por 24.000 ducados… vendía indulgencias a los pavos de los cristianos que se lo creían.” — Nieves (11:52)

The Rest Is History—With a Caveat

• Why Was This the Last Straw?
  • Luther’s protest was fueled by various factors: over-commercialization of relics, invented saints, and flagrant disregard for clerical celibacy.
  • “Lo que más le cabreaba también era el comercio de huesos humanos, los miles de santos inventados… el celibato impuesto, las novias y los novios de los cardenales.” — Nieves (14:00)
• Protestants Not Saints Either: Nieves, as a self-declared atheist, notes that the Protestant reformers also engaged in their share of corruption and abuses.

Memorable Quotes and Moments

• On the Power of Mythmaking:
  “Se teatralizó la historia de la clavada del cartel y también se eligió premeditadamente el día… el 31 de octubre, víspera de Todos los Santos.” — Nieves (05:30)

• On Church Corruption:
  “León X era el Papa de entonces… un sinvergonzón sin escrúpulos que dijo aquello de ‘Dios nos ha dado el papado, disfrutémoslo’.” — Nieves (07:16)

• On Indulgences as a Business:
  “Cuando digo un negocio no es un eufemismo, es que era un negocio. Estaba perfectamente organizado.” — Nieves (11:52)

• On Exploiting Fear:
  “La Iglesia se encargaba, aún se encarga de meter pánico, terror con el más allá para venderle a la gente la salvación.” — Nieves (10:32)

• On Reformation’s Real Impact:
  “No vaya a parecer esto que los protestantes luteranos eran buenos. Siguieron haciendo las mismas canalladas que sus colegas católicos.” — Nieves (14:25)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:42 — Introduction: Why religious conflicts are the fiercest
• 01:29 — Luther’s legendary “door moment” (myth recounted)
• 04:38 — Deconstructing the myth: what really happened
• 06:51 — The printing press changes everything
• 09:35 — What are indulgences? How did they work?
• 11:52 — Who benefited from indulgences? Corruption in the Church
• 14:00 — Additional abuses and Luther’s motivations

Summary

Nieves Concostrina unpacks the Protestant Reformation’s origin story, debunking the heroic narrative of Luther nailing his 95 Theses and exposing the intricate, profit-driven machinery of the medieval Church. The episode reveals how technological innovation (the printing press) unintentionally became a weapon against entrenched power, and how religious institutions—then and now—capitalize on fear. Concostrina’s irreverent tone, historical rigor, and skepticism toward religious power make the episode both entertaining and enlightening—a must-listen for those interested in how history is written, edited, and sometimes, simply made up.