Podcast Episode Summary
Podcast: Todo Concostrina
Host: Nieves Concostrina
Episode: Acontece que no es poco | Santa Juana de Pacotilla (y Arco)
Date: May 30, 2022
Overview
In this episode, Nieves Concostrina applies her incisive, witty historical commentary to the story of Joan of Arc (“Juana de Arco”), exploring her rise and fall as France’s national heroine and eventual saint. The episode dissects the political machinations, the absurdities of religious authority, and the strange posthumous journey from heretic to patron saint. True to the show’s style, the tone is irreverent, playful, and critical, punctuated by memorable one-liners and a healthy dose of skepticism.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Religion and its Overreach (00:57 - 01:40)
- The co-host sets the stage by discussing how religions have long interfered in spheres beyond personal belief, using patron saints as a curious case.
- Joan of Arc is presented as both a national symbol of France (a secular state) and its saintly protector, which Nieves finds deeply ironic.
2. Introducing Joan of Arc and the Setup (01:40 - 02:57)
- Nieves summarizes Joan’s life at breakneck speed, highlighting her vision-fueled rise and ultimate execution:
- Known as the “doncella de Orleans” (Maid of Orleans).
- Claimed to receive divine guidance, led armies, and shifted the tide against the English in the Hundred Years’ War.
- Eventually condemned and burned for heresy, cross-dressing (wearing pants), and short hair—her enemies were “repartidos, como yo.”
Quote:
"La respetuosa multinacional Iglesia católica achicharró en la hoguera atada a un poste a Juana de Arco. Y lo más grande es que los mismos que la achicharraron la beatificaron primero y la canonizaron después." —Nieves (01:42)
3. Character Analysis: Joan as “Santa de Pacotilla” (03:00 - 03:32)
- Nieves mocks the mythologizing of Joan, playfully attributing her actions to "politoxicomanía" (substance abuse) and delusions.
- Her visions, while politically useful, made her expendable once she ceased serving powerful interests.
Quote:
"La mujer, como poco, era politoxicómana. [...] Creía que el tal Dios y sus secuaces le decían haz esto, Juana, haz lo otro. Y ella lo hacía." —Nieves (03:00)
4. The Political Context: The Hundred Years’ War (04:47 - 06:22)
- Nieves frames Joan’s interventions within the broader chaos: France torn between two French claimants and an English pretender after the king’s death without heir.
- The feuding factions (Orleans vs. Burgundy) created a prolonged and shifting conflict.
Quote:
"La guerra de los 100 años... todo el mundo sabe que duró 116. Más de un siglo estuvieron aguantazos ingleses y franceses por hacerse con el trono de Francia." —Nieves (05:05)
5. Joan’s Provocative Persona: Gender and Power (06:28 - 08:09)
- Joan approached the future King Charles VII (“gentil Delfín”) with confidence, short hair, and tight pants.
- Despite her wild claims of divine communication, what most troubled authorities wasn’t her audacity but whether she was truly a virgin.
- Her virginity was “proven” by a royal mother-in-law, which granted her further credibility and command.
Quote:
"Es muy grande también, que nadie dudara de las charlas con las santas, pero dudara de que fuera doncella." —Nieves (07:15)
6. Betrayal by Charles VII and Capture (09:27 - 12:11)
- Once King, Charles VII (nicknamed "el bien servido" for his indulgent lifestyle and official mistress) abandoned Joan when her militancy became inconvenient.
- Joan was eventually captured by the Burgundians, handed to the English, and finally turned over to the Church for trial.
Quote:
"Este hombre pasó de delfín a besugo directamente. Y siguiendo porque era un gilipollas. Así de claro." —Nieves (09:27)
7. The Absurdity of Her Trial and Execution (12:11 - 13:45)
- Joan's initial offenses: cross-dressing and “talking to God without permission.” The hypocrisy is called out: “Hablar con Dios. Hasta ahora les venía bien, pero ahora ya no.”
- Ultimately, the Church condemned her not just as a heretic but as “relapsa” (a repeat offender)—for which she was burned.
Quote:
"La Iglesia declaró a Juana hereje y marimacho, pero le si a partir de ahora te vistes como una señorita, te dejas unas trenzas y te pones una faldita como Dios manda, pues te perdonamos." —Nieves (12:24)
8. Posthumous Rehabilitation and Sainthood (13:45 - 14:25)
- Only 25 years later, the Church recanted its verdict—declaring Joan innocent.
- Five centuries after her execution, she’s made a saint: “la única santa católica con pantalones.”
Quote:
"A buenas horas, mangas verdes, y 500 años después ya era santa." —Nieves (13:59)
Notable Quotes and Moments
-
Nieves on the Church’s Paradoxes:
"Que canonizaran a una mujer con pantalones, cuando además Francia tuvo oficialmente prohibido que las mujeres usaran pantalones hasta mediados del siglo XX." (04:59) -
Mocking the Authorities:
"Yo más que relapsa la hubiera condenado por plasta. Cansina, la verdad." —Nieves (13:31) -
Witty Take on Royalty:
"No se me ocurre una forma más divertida de perder un reino." [Sobre Carlos VII] (10:17)
Key Timestamps
- 00:57 – Origins of patron saints and Joan of Arc’s paradoxical role
- 01:40 – Joan's legend, execution, and posthumous canonization
- 04:47 – Political backdrop: Hundred Years’ War and split factions
- 06:28 – Joan’s entry to the court and gender expectations
- 09:27 – Charles VII’s betrayal and Joan’s downfall
- 12:11 – The absurdities of her trial, cross-dressing, “relapsa”, execution
- 13:45 – Rehabilitation: from heretic to innocent to saint
Tone and Style
The conversation is brisk, cheeky, and laced with sarcasm and irreverence. Nieves Concostrina doesn’t hesitate to use colloquial humor (“gilipollas”, "politoxicómana") and critical asides about both historical figures and institutions, making historical narrative both accessible and subversively entertaining.
Useful for Listeners Who Haven’t Listened
This summary presents the backbone and highlights of the conversation, capturing the irreverent yet informative style of Nieves Concostrina. Essential historical events are contextualized with colorful commentary, making the controversy and farce of Joan of Arc’s story clear—even without listening to the full episode.