← Tom Bilyeu's Impact Theory
Tom Bilyeu's Impact Theory
How Putting Yourself First Drives Success | Tom Bilyeu AMA (Archived Episode)
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Tom Bilyeu
You're listening to the Impact Theory podcast, your source of empowering ideas and actionable techniques from the world's highest achievers. Join host Tom Bilyeu, serial entrepreneur and co founder of the billion dollar brand Quest Nutrition, on a journey to unlock your potential and realize your vision of success. Welcome to Impact Theory. Hey everybody. Welcome to another episode of AMA Live. I am here to answer your questions, so be sure to drop those bad boys in. And if this is adding value to your life, please do share it. That would be amazing. And today's episode is brought to you by Everything Is My Fault, which you can find like a Sesame street episode you can find at shop.impacttheory.com check it out if you want to self signal to yourself and empower yourself to do something amazing. All right, we're going to dive right in. First question is from AnatoliAlanWell from the Connect Inbox, which by the way, if you want to submit your questions ahead of time, you can do that to connectimpacttheory.com all right, I'm a single mother and want nothing more than to be able to provide for my daughter. I'm torn between studying something that will help others or help my family profit. There's a lot of other details, but I'm gonna stop there. So this is a classic conundrum that a lot of people are struggling with and it comes in a lot of different forms from mother or father is sick and do I give up my career to go take care of them? And here's the reality. There is power in being selfish. The truth of the matter is you have one life to live and if you really want deep and lasting fulfillment, if you want to make the absolute most of this life, I'm telling you right now, there is one formul for that, and it goes like this. It is what the ancient Greeks call techni, the human animal is designed to adapt and grow. Because of that, nature has given a pleasure response to doing the things that actually get us to adapt and grow so that we can conquer our environment. And that is learning is intensely pleasurable. Now it needs to be learning something that you actually care about. And this is where it all comes back to techni. Techni is about gaining a set of skills that was very hard to acquire and is unique to you, but is in service of other people. And it's that combination of things. It is something you're deeply interested in. It is something that you fan the flames of until it really becomes a passion. And it is something that was hard to acquire, but becomes a set of skills that is unique to you. Now, the expression of those skills, the use of those skills in service of other people is the thing that's going to light you on fire. So the great news here is the answer to your question. To live a life that is going to be fulfilling to you is going to help other people. But if you just lead with, oh, I want to go do something for other people, you will find yourself in a nightmare scenario where you're not able to take very good care of them because you haven't spent the time to acquire a skill set that is actually useful to other people. And on top of that, you won't be fulfilled yourself. And when you're not fulfilled, you don't have the energy that you're going to need to do the hard things to take care of the people that you love the most. So when I look at my own life, and I look at the truth of the statement that's often attributed to Mother Teresa, but may or may not actually be a Mother Teresa quote, is people will not act for the many, but they will act for the one. So look, when you're assessing what skill set you want to acquire, first and foremost, it needs to be selfish. It needs to be something that you're interested in, because in that selfish love, passion, excitement for that thing, you're going to have the energy to actually develop a skillset that'll be usable to other people. Now, if you can find the areas of overlap where it's also something that's going to serve your family, whatever that may be. And you talk about your father having a construction business, if I'm not mistaken, but you want to become a lawyer. Yes. So you're talking about potentially going and working for a nonprofit to be a lawyer. But that's not necessarily going to give you what you want to help your family. So the question is, why do you want to become a nonprofit lawyer? And if you can work backwards from what is, is it in that that you're trying to do? So if it's just helping people, the real question to ask is, is helping people as a nonprofit the way that's going to utilize most powerfully the skillset that you want to build? And then will it help a great number of people? And quite frankly, is it going to leave your family isolated? So I think that you're going to have to take into consideration all those different things. So finding the area of overlap where you're doing things like, I'm guessing it doesn't take a lot to provide the kinds of resources to your family that you want. This isn't like where you have to become a millionaire. So the question if law is interesting to you and you want to be able to take care of your family, but you also want to be able to help people, what's the balance in that? So if becoming a lawyer is really the thing that's exciting for you, a you can work somewhere that's making the kind of money that you're going to need to take care of yourself and your family, but also allows you to do pro bono work. So if I was in this exact situation, what I would do is I would become the lawyer that I want to become. If that's the thing that's really driving me, I'm really passionate about that. But. But I would find a law firm that is actually going to help me or going to allow me and in fact, encourage me to take pro bono work, which many law firms do. So Peter Diamandis has a law, and he says when given an option between two things, take both. So when given an option between doing something for yourself and doing something for your family, do both. All right, next question is from Michelle Caliopi Amato. How do you take an idea and put it into action? I am so great with ideas, but freeze when it comes to getting started. I actually just recorded some Alexa content around this and there's in it. I broke down the four things you really need to do to get started. Let's see if I can remember them off the top of my head. Number one, start small. I normally hate when people talk about baby steps, but the reality is, what paralyzes a lot of people from taking action is they're looking at the entire universe of what they're trying to accomplish, and it is overwhelming. And because there's so many pieces of that puzzle you don't know or understand when you're trying to wrap your head around and really figure out how you go from where you are to the very end of the puzzle, it actually is paralyzing in the sense you don't have the skill set, you don't even have the understanding. There are many, many things you're not even aware enough about. So even though that may be the goal that gets you excited and motivated, don't get lost in all of the steps along the way. Just figure out what is the very first step. So if you want to be a professional dancer, don't worry about what it takes to go on tour with, you know, Justin Timberlake on his upcoming album, go take a dance class, and figure out whether or not you actually are going to enjoy it enough to continue to pursue it to that point. Just that simple step. All right, next, it needs to be something that's number two. It needs to be something that is exciting for you if you don't have the excitement. And this is why. Take that small first step, that baby step, just to see if you enjoyed it. If you don't enjoy the very first step, chances are that you're not going to enjoy the entire process. And there's something called woop. W O O P, wish, outcome, obstacle, plan. So wish, what is your wish? But outcome, don't let it stay in the realm of, like, magic, fairyland. What is the actual outcome that you want from that wish? So I want to be rich and famous. Okay, what is the outcome that you're actually looking for is, do you want to be a business person? Do you want to be an actor? Like, what is that actual thing? How are you going to make that wish come true? Very, very specific, concrete path to that. Okay, once we have that, what's the obstacle that stands between your outcome and where you are today? So once you identify that, then you come up with a plan. When you look at the woop altogether, how does it make you feel in your gut? If it terrifies you, then chances are that this isn't something that you have the excitement for, that you're going to be willing to push through the difficulty of that obstacle part to actually execute on your plan. If, on the other hand, when you look at whoop. And you think, whoa, the steps that I actually have to go through. So going back to the first question, if the thought of becoming a lawyer sounds like torture to you, that is not the path that you want to march down. But if you look at something like being a professional gamer, for instance, random, but an example that I use all the time, because this is often the thing that people dismiss and say, well, I could never do that. But if when you think about what you would have to do to become a professional gamer, that the path, the stretch of difficulty in the middle of actually acquiring the skill, sounds interesting to you, lights you on fire, gets you excited, then that's gonna give you the energy that you need to keep pushing through. So a lot of this just comes down to what is the thing that gives you the energy. And so that's really the aim of Whoop is to figure out which of those things is going to give you that level of excitement. Okay, number three. Man, I really thought I was going to pull this off with the three things taking action. Let me just now make it up on the spot. Those are the first two things that's really important. Oh, I do remember. So the next thing, you're going to want to enlist a friend. So this is a big deal, because when you enlist somebody that has expectations that you're actually going to show up, chances are way more likely that you're actually going to show up. So that's a really big deal. Get other people that are going to reinforce this behavior. You guys have heard it said a thousand times that you want to find, or you're the average of the five people that you spend the most time with. So part of what makes that so powerful isn't just the way they think. It's that they're holding you accountable to the things you said you were going to do. And then four, the last thing is you want to make sure that you are leveraging identity, actually tying your identity to the outcome. So once you've gone and engaged with it in some way, you've taken that first step, you realize you have excitement, you've looked at whoop, you're super amped up, you've got somebody else that's going to engage us with you. You want to start telling anybody and everybody who will listen that you're going to do that. So I'm the type of person that is willing to become the personal dancer, or, wow, personal dancer to become a professional dancer. So whatever that thing is, using that phrase, I'm the type of person that. I'm the type of person that will put in the work to do this. Then once you're committed to that and you've been reinforcing it in yourself, you wanna tell the world at large that you're Going to do that. I'm gonna become a professional dancer. You do all of those things, not only are you gonna find out if you have the energy, but you're gonna have the accountability to go through. All right, so that's how you take that first action. My bad. Off the top of my head, I'm gonna go with that. Okay, question from Olga Alvarado. How can I find my true passion? You said no question is off limits. If I find that when someone is very successful, the one thing you must have is passion, true passion for. But if you are 100 years old and still don't know what your passion is, how to figure it out? Okay, so the question is the age old question. The question I get asked the most. How do I find my passion? So the awesome news is this is a step by step process and it goes exactly like this. If this is a burning question for you and you're driving, pull over, write this down. Because following these steps is actually going to get you where you want to go. So it begins with identifying an area of interest. To do that, you need to encounter a whole bunch of things. So go do a lot of things. And right now inside of you is probably a vague direction that you want to go in. So start encountering things in that arena. So hearkening back to the first question. If it's law, go intern at a law firm and see if you actually enjoy being around that. Is that a world that you actually want to be in before you end up going to law school? Or go take an online law class and see if that's something that lights you on fire? But find some way to engage in that thing and engage in a breadth of things in if at all humanly possible, so that you really find out which of those things you want. Now once you find something that interests you, you're going to really engage with it. So if it's you do the online law course, let's say, and then you go into a full blown summer internship or something like that in a law firm to see if you really like it. And that day after day after day engagement, you're going to see if your energy levels are going up or going down, assuming that they're going up. Now, we've identified a fascination. Once you have something that is a fascination now you're going to go through the process of g mastery in that thing. And it is in the process of gaining mastery, you'll figure out whether or not this is something that become, can become a real passion. Now to make these Transitions happen. You've got to be fanning these flames. So when you go into the law office, chances are the day to day is going to be meh. And you've got to decide whether or not you're going to allow yourself to get excited. Not allow that. You're going to encourage that. You're going to remind yourself that you're going to pick up. You're going to remind yourself to get excited. You're going to pick up on some. One small thing. So let's say that thing is there's a particular case where somebody is. I'll just use Jarrett Adams, somebody who was on impact theory, was wrongly convicted, turns himself into a lawyer, comes out and decides that he's going to help other people do exactly the same thing. Right. Incredibly interesting. I love that story. So if I were at a law firm and I saw that they had a case, it was something like that where they were trying to get an innocent man off. I would say, holy hell. Like, this is really fast. I'm literally saying this to myself as a way to amp myself up. And this is something that I think people don't do enough. You need to cultivate in yourself an excitability. You need to be able to get excited about things. And in the beginning, you're being your own hype man, and it's gonna feel a little bit fake, but you need to do that in order to actually get yourself excited. And so that you're feeding that neurochemistry into yourself so that you're actually getting worked up. You want to work yourself up. Now, there's a really fascinating thing that happens from a neurological perspective where if you get amped up, and this is true, by the way, whether you're getting angry, whether you're getting sad, whether you're getting happy, frustrated, falling in love, whatever the case may be, when you force yourself into a neurological state, you're giving your brain the signal that it's worthy of this state. So then your brain retroactively goes back and goes, wow, that was a really big deal. This was something that I learned in my marriage. Realizing that when I allowed myself to get really frustrated, my mind would actually then paint back onto whatever started that argument that, that, yeah, it was really worth going that hard. And so, like this really minor thing that from the outside seems stupid to you, you justify it? No, no, no. That was really important. That was worth getting that hyped up. Now flip it. Use that on the positive. When you see that thing in this area of engagement, if you want to turn it into a fascination, then you need to start amping yourself up about it. Oh, man, this is really exciting. You need to go tell the other the story to other people. You need to be excited as you tell the story. All of this is reinforcing in yourself that this is actually something worthy of excitement. And all of a sudden, you're going to find, whoa, like, I was kind of just hyping myself up before, but I actually really am hyped up now. And so when that fascination solidifies, that's when you go down the process of gaining true mastery. And you need the energy and passion to get through the process of gaining mastery. Oftentimes, mastery involves a lot of boredom. It involves a lot of overcoming obstacle after obstacle. You've got to have a lot of tenacity. And that's going to be born of that compelling future that you see where once you have that set of skills, that you're going to be able to use it to help other people and that it's enriching your life. I mean, all of those things that are getting you amped up, you fan those flames, and that's how it becomes a real passion. But it is a process. It is a process. It is something that you're doing very cognizantly. You're thinking about it. You're making choices all along the way. The first choice to engage, the second choice to fan the flames, and the final choice to actually go down the process of. And the words I use are becoming the best in the world. If you're not prepared to become the best in the world at this, if becoming the best in the world isn't exciting to you, actually thinking about what it would be like to be the greatest of all time at the thing that you're pursuing. If that's not exciting, then that's not the path. But that's how you create a passion. There it is.
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Tom Bilyeu
All right, next up, this is from Vince Nance. What do you think is the most destructive or dangerous thought process that someone can engage in? Okay, so I'm Gonna take a step slightly to the right on this one because it's on my mind. I was creating more Alexa content around this, which, by the way, if you gu guys aren't watching, if you have an Alexa, an Amazon Echo, or any one of the Alexa pieces of hardware, subscribe to my daily briefing. I'm putting a lot of energy into this and it's become the beginning of the funnel for me where I'll think of these short little concepts. I'll spend, I'll do a 90 second piece of content around which you can listen to daily on the Amazon Alexa. And then from that, like, it really starts putting things on my mind. So one of the things I was thinking about that's super dangerous, that people don't even realize they're doing is you have these invisible beliefs. And one of the pieces of content coming up in the next I don't know week that I just recorded this morning was about asking yourself, like, there's certain questions that you can ask yourself. I came up with four again. Like if I can remember them off the top of my head. Let's see. So number one, the first two come from Einstein. The first one being ask yourself to really identify these beliefs that are invisible. And by the way, the reason that they're invisible is because you just assumed that they're true. Like, you've never stopped to think about the fact that at some point you chose to believe this and that that was a choice and that there really, there is no objectively true answer to a lot of these things. So again, the first two come from Einstein. Number one is, do you live in a friendly or hostile universe? And Einstein said that was the single most important decision, and I love that he called it a decision. It's the single most important decision that any human being will ever make. So you just decide, is the universe working for you or against you? Okay. Number two, is everything a miracle or is nothing a miracle? Again, there's no objective truth to that. You just need to decide. Like when you look outside at even the snow, right, and the cold and think about the passing of the seasons and how spring will rejuvenate everything, like, is that a miracle to you or is it you just look outside and it's fucking cold and you want anything to do with the cold, and so it just sucks, Right? Those are both choices. Number three. Yeah, I don't remember off the top of my head what the other questions are, but identifying what those beliefs are in your life that you just take for granted is insanely important. And I'll give you one that I didn't put on the list because it was too cheesy, but it's actually really, really true. And that's. Do you see the glass as half empty or half full? This is, again, it's a choice. You simply decide. But. And whether to be optimistic or pessimistic will color the entire rest of your life. So really going through and looking at the invisible beliefs that you have, because those invisible beliefs are controlling your life and they are the most empowering or the most dangerous things you can engage in. All right. From a thought process perspective. All right, next question is from Dr. Jack Callahan. Do you describe. Do you subscribe to the idea of Tai Lopez's four pillars for good life of health, wealth, love and happiness, or do you have your own version? Let's think through those. Health for shways. Wealth. Yeah, I mean, I think wealth is. As long as your basic needs are being met, that becomes more of a personal thing. Love and happiness. Yeah, I. So I think of it slightly differently. So here's how I think of it. I think that people should be focused on a life of fulfillment. Now fulfillment is made up of things and many of those things are in that list right there. Health being a massive one of those. I think wealth is a lot more personal. So I think that there are monks out in the world who have totally eschewed anything worldly. And I think that their life is just fine. And I would guess if they really love that pursuit of enlightenment or whatever word they use to capture it, that they are deeply fulfilled by that, especially if they're helping other people. For me, however, being ambitious and having grand things that I want to make come true in my life, wealth is very important to me because it's the great facilitator. But it all depends on what you're trying to accomplish. So coming up with something universal. The only thing I can think of that's universal is going to be a neurochemical state. And the easiest way to sum up the best long term neurochemical state because it allows for struggle, suffering, all of that is fulfillment. Because I actually think fulfillment is born out of suffering. It's not born out of momentary happiness. So there you have it. So I don't think Ty is crazy for that. I think, man, those four are gonna speak to a lot, a lot of people and they're certainly gonna speak to the people that resonate with him. And my gut is that those are entirely true for him. I just don't think that they're all universal. Okay, next question is from Louis Zamudio. This is from Facebook. What is one advice that no one told you but that you learned in the process of becoming successful? This is my big one, lean in. You've heard me talk about this a lot and if it hasn't sunk in, hopefully this will be that lightning rod moment. What you build your self esteem around matters. And it matters more than almost anything else in your life. If you build your self esteem around being right, being smart, being good, being valuable, any of those things, you are setting yourself up for tremendous failure. You need to build your self esteem around something that is antifragile. By that I mean something that the more you attack it, the more the stronger it gets. You also need to build your self esteem around something that is always moving you towards your goals. So if you think about building your self esteem around being right, it doesn't always move you towards your goal because sometimes being right, which is going to make you feel good, actually isn't the right thing to move you towards your goal. So that was certainly the thing that created the moment of crisis in myself that made me realize that that's what I was doing. So once I realized that, holy hell, like here I have my goals on one hand and I have the desire to feel good about myself on the other hand. And they're not mutually, they're not always anyway mutually compatible, so I need to give one of them up. And then thinking through that I realized that doesn't make any sense because people who no longer feel good about themselves and believe that they'll never feel good about themselves again, they commit suicide. So that's like a pretty important thing I would say in people's lives to have something that makes you feel good about who you are. And on the other hand I'm very goal oriented. So I do want to accomplish this. So I thought, well, the only option I have is to build goals that always speak to my fragile ego, which doesn't seem to make sense because it was fragile because I was priding myself on being smart and I was constantly encountering people who were smarter than me or being right. And I was wrong more than I was right. So I decided to switch my self esteem to being the learner and being willing to admit when I was wrong that then I didn't have the words at the time, but that I began to realize once I read Nassim Taleb's book is the only antifragile way to think. And on top of that it's the Only way that I can, that I can think of to think that is always going to move you towards your goals. Because if you're always willing to admit when you're wrong, you have the barometer by which to judge or right or wrong, which is it moves me towards my goals or it does not. So if your barometer is, hey, this either moves me towards my goals or it doesn't. And you're always willing to admit when you're wrong and you're always willing to learn from other people because you're the learner. Like suddenly it's everything about yourself. And going back to that notion that we started this off with, there is power in being selfish. So if you're selfishly wanting to make yourself feel good about who you are and your self esteem is built around being humble and always listening, always learning, always being willing to admit when you're wrong, now suddenly the most selfish act you could do is be humble. The most selfish thing you could do is listen to somebody else. The most selfish thing that you could do is acquire new skills or admit when you're wrong or realize that you have an inadequacy and to stare at that inadequacy. This is a very long answer because this is very important. It is the single most powerful thing that you could do in terms of changing the way that you think. All right, next question is from Nick Perez. Hi, Tom. How do I deal with people who make passive aggressive comments at work? How do I balance being kind but not overly nice to the point of where I'm being taken advantage of? Okay, here's the reality. I'm going to put myself in your shoes and I've actually done this, and I've done this a lot, and at times it has bitten me in the ass. So you're going to have to follow me through, follow my logic to decide whether or not you want to do this. So first and foremost I believe in principles, which is truth is the highest thing. Principle. Not coming up with a great word there. So read Ray Dalio's book Principles in that he talks about if you're really goal oriented, you need to know the truth at all times, at all costs. And even if that means taking on something that's very hard to hear. So because that's my highest value, then I'm going to live by that first and foremost. So I, I'm going to make sure that I'm not being passive aggressive, that I'm not doing stupid shit, that I prove to people time and time again that I'm willing to have somebody point out something about myself, to always be brutally honest with me, that basically there's no reason to be passive aggressive, that you can tell me the truth. But if I haven't created that space where somebody can just tell me what they really think so that they don't need to be passive aggressive, I can't blame them for not being able to just directly confront me. So first and foremost, lead by example. Make sure people understand that the principles are all I care about, that I want to know the truth, that I welcome that, that I don't bite back if somebody tells me something that's true even when it hurts. And by the way, if you really want to welcome people to telling you the truth in your life, you've got to get to the point, even if they're doing it to be a dick, that you welcome that with open arms, that you really want to hear it. Now, of course, it sucks when people are being a dick and they're saying something to be hurtful, but if you rebuff the way that they say it, which, by the way, they will stop doing it that way over time, I will explain how in a second. But first you've got to be willing to take it however it comes. Okay? Now, once I've established that if somebody gives me a remark like that, I'm going to say, that makes me feel like you're being passive aggressive. I'm just going to call it out. But I'm going to own that maybe I'm wrong. And so that ideally, if it's happening around other people, I'm going to ask them, hey, this is how that makes me feel. But I'd like to know if I'm crazy or not. And that way people get a chance to either say yes, no, or stay silent, right? And if they stay silent, then it's like, okay, I get it, like, this is a very uncomfortable thing. But, like, please understand that truth is my highest priority. And I would actually walk people through that. Now, that's what you're doing when you're not the boss. Ideally, I would encourage you to find a company that deploys some version of this, because trying to do this as a grassroots measure in a company that doesn't reinforce that is going to be a nightmare. So the truth is that I would really try to get out of that. But now if you're in a company, and this is how I'll explain why the person is going to stop being passive aggressive over time, if you're in a company where that's rewarded and you're leading by example. And it really is like a part of who you are when you call that person out and people give feedback. Now they're going to see either that they are being passive aggressive or you're going to realize that you're wrong and that you're misreading it. Either one's great. It's a win because you're getting to the truth. So getting to that truth, always calling people out and stuff like that, but not in a jerky way, but just saying, hey, this is how it makes me feel. I'd like to get other people's feedback. And that's how you do it. And we actually do that here at Impact Theory. It is fucking amazing. It sounds crazy. I get it. And when we first started doing it, even I was like, oh, God, is this going to work? It's amazing. It is life altering. And I wish for everybody that you could work in a company that prides themselves on getting to the truth in all things, that nobody thinks that they're above the law, that nobody comes to the table assuming that they're right, and that everybody knows that on some things are credible and on other things are not. Now, according to Ray Dalio, I don't have enough experience with this to vouch for it or not. It seems true. But he says about 30% of the world just can't get on board with it. So there you have it. You're inevitably going to encounter people that just can't ever get behind that. I wouldn't let them work here. So that is. That's just the truth. Anybody that's not into the truth is not my friend. So there you have it. All right, next question is from Mary Jessa Ann Facebook. How can you motivate someone who admits he she does not have a goal in life? How can you handle the fact that your image of success is being overshadowed by someone who does not have the same ideals and vision like you? How can you handle the fact that your image of success being overshadowed? Um, so let's take. These are two very different questions. Okay? So how can you motivate someone who admits he she does not have a goal in life? You don't. And I want to be abundantly clear. And right now, the image in my mind, even though I've never seen it, is Rocky Horror Picture Show. When this question is answered, I want to know that I could aim the mic at the crowd and you guys would all say in unison, you don't. You don't motivate other people. The whole idea. You've got to find people that are self motivated. You've got to find people that they have that in them. I am not in the game of trying to change people. So if you think of the Matrix, my favorite metaphor ever, at the end of the day, you've got to give people a choice. Red pill, blue pill. If they choose to take the blue pill and go back in the Matrix and continue a life that has no goals, that's for sure, man. That is their choice. And I don't pass moral judgment on that. If that's the life that they want to live, that is absolutely awesome. I have nothing to offer them. I cannot help them or be useful. I will seem crazy to them without question. Because I'm falling over myself to take a pill that wakes me up in the real world so that I can see the truth and really understand what I'm like, what skills I have, what skills I don't have and be able to improve them and actually accomplish my goals. All right, don't scroll off. I need to see the second part of that question. So that's the first part. Second part. How do you handle the fact that your image of success is being overshadowed by someone who does not have the same ideals and vision like you? I don't understand what that means, actually, so I'll answer it. What I thought you were asking was how do you deal with somebody who's outshining you? Like, easily, like they don't have some big vision that they were chasing. That's what I thought you were saying. So let's just answer that since I understand that question. This is one of those things that's insanely frustrating. So I will talk about weight loss, my wife, who outworks me in the gym, without question every single day. The woman is a beast. But before she got into that routine, I remember saying to her, you don't put on fat as easily as I do. We would go on vacation and we would cheat on our diets, and she would match me calorie for calorie. Now I'm twice her size. She would match me calorie for calorie and wouldn't put on weight. And I would. Which essentially means I'm eating half of what she's eating and putting on fat. She's eating twice what I'm eating and not putting on fat. And I remember being really frustrated by that. But the thing is, that's the reality. That's the truth. And I can sit there and lament that my wife has better genetics than I or I can accept that that's the reality and that to get the result that I want, I have to do different things. Now, spending my time being frustrated is not going to help me. It is not going to move me forward. So someone outshining me and doing it easily without the level of effort that I have to put in it may be unfair, but what the fuck does that matter? That is not going to help me. So wasting even an ounce of energy, lamenting that is an ounce of energy that I'm not putting towards actually accomplishing my goals. So you just got to deal with it. The world is not fair, but you can accomplish anything that you're willing to pay the price to accomplish. So just focus on that and crush it. Next question. Jalen Holmes. Hey Tom, I was wondering if you could explain the meaning behind the saying on your T shirt. Thanks. I can. And thank you for asking. Which by the way, if you're just joining us, this is one of the Impact Theory special shirts which you can find at shop.impacttheory.com it's all about self signaling, reminding yourself of an important idea that you want to be reminded of. And today, everything is my fault. Now this is the notion of taking extreme ownership in your life. It is the thing that will Change your life 100%. So once you decide that you can learn anything you set your mind to and that being incompetent is an in permanent state, that at any time you could choose to allocate your time and energy to that thing and get good at it, that's gonna free you up from not wanting to accept the truth about where your skillset really is. Because when you believe that accepting something like that is a permanent sentence and that failing means you're a failure, being bad at something means you're forever bad at that. Once you realize that you can change it, then all of a sudden that weight of recognizing, staring at your inadequacies and accepting you're not yet good at that thing, like you can now move forward in getting good at that. So I remind myself that my life is not reflective of my circumstances. It is reflective entirely of the choices that I've made. So the things that I have not managed to succeed at in life, those aren't some other things fall. It's not the economy, it's not the way that I was raised. It's not my genetics. It's the result of the things that I've chosen to get good at. Period. So the story that I always tell is if my wife were killed by a meteorite, I would not blame fate, luck, divine providence, anything like that. I would blame myself. Why? Because I know that there's actually a group of people that track what are called near earth objects. They're trying to find some way a nuclear explosion, lasers, whatever the case is going to be to knock that thing off course. I know they exist. I've never sent them an idea, I've never sent them money, I've never sent them even encouraging words. Now, I think that that's smart. I think the likelihood of my wife being killed by a meteorite is virtually zero. So spending my time and energy there does not make sense. But if I end up being wrong about that my wife's killed by a meteorite, I'm not going to blame the meteorite. Now, once you're willing to take that level of ownership in your life and say, I'm making the money at my job that I'm making because of choices I have made, instead of blaming the economy, instead of blaming the generation before you or whatever, and you just own, I can make different choices and get a different result. And here, like I'll just. Any millennials out there, I will just promise you right now, let's just assume that you were dealt the shittiest hand of all time. What the fuck does that matter? How is that going to help you? There will be millionaires and billionaires self made in your generation. So the question is, why not you? And the answer is because you haven't decided to get those skills, Period. End of story. And once you're willing to accept that, regardless of how the deck is stacked against you, you can either bemoan that or do something about it. My advice, do something about it. No matter how hard it may be, if you care enough about it, go make it happen. All right, that's the shirt. Next question is from Carolina Wilk from Facebook. How often do you catch yourself on the following on following the invisible beliefs? And how often do you ask questions to yourself about your daily activities? So I used to catch myself with disempowering invisible beliefs all the time. I'm talking 20 times a day. It was ridiculous. As I began to really adopt a growth mindset, I saw how often, how insidious those invisible beliefs are because I was finally aware of them. And then once you're aware of them, you see them everywhere. It was insanity. I don't see that much anymore. Every now and then there's stuff where it's like, oh wow, like I can't Believe even I went pessimistic on that. In fact, there was something that happened recently. It was a failure of principles, so a failure of imagination for me. When I was at Quest, I didn't think that you could structure the organization entirely around truth. It didn't even occur to me that you could hold people to that standard. That every time someone was passive aggressive or every time somebody said something that wasn't true or when somebody just failed, that you could just call them out in a very simple, direct and honest way of just like, hey, you've fallen down there. What do we need to do to make sure that this doesn't happen again? That you could literally score people on their believability in certain things. That there is a difference between a meritocracy where the best idea wins and a democracy where the most votes wins. And I literally, once I read Principles, I couldn't believe that I had just failed to think big enough. So that was a time where, yep, an invisible belief had had really had a profound and negative consequence on my life. I was mortified to wake up to the truth of that, but also super fucking excited that Ray Dalio had taken the time to write that book, which has changed everything about my life and has certainly changed this company for the better. I think it's empowering. I think everybody should read it. It is. It is. From a business book perspective, it is the most important book I've ever read. There you go. All right, question from Jeremy Stickney. Hi, Tom. My question is, do you think you can pull everyone out of the Matrix or pull a select few to overcome the system? I ask because the way civilization is run is based on a fixed mindset. I just got done talking about invisible beliefs. Here's the truth, though, and it's probably an invisible belief, but I don't think that I can pull everyone out of the Matrix. I'm not even trying to pull everyone out of the Matrix. So I'm looking to find people that want out and help them out. That's the reality. So I feel like, and I could be wrong and Lord knows I am open if someone can show me how I'm wrong. That would be amazing. And not with a bullshit trite statement about you can do anything you set your mind to, which I'm guilty of saying all the fucking time. But I try to back people up with how you go about that. So if someone can show me how, how I could actually pull everyone out of the Matrix without spending all of my time and energy on the people who don't want out, which seems like a total catastrophic waste. I will change in an instant. But right now my belief is that that's impossible and that my it is not impossible, but a way better allocation of my time and energy into pulling the people out that want out because there are so many of them that don't know how to get out that it's just way better to spend my time there. Now if I am fortunate and we're able to pull so many people out that I'm just left looking for people that want out that haven't already gotten out, then I'll start trying to figure out exactly how to pull the people out who are actively antagonistic. I will say though secretive secrets. That's what I think that the films are meant to do. So I believe in a multi generational approach of planting seeds so that ultimately people just never end up in the Matrix. So very different than thinking I can pull everyone out. My hope is I can keep people from getting in. But that takes a multi generational approach of creating content that informs people's belief system that points out that you invisible beliefs so that people don't adopt them. So generation after generation, fewer and fewer people have a fixed mindset. So there you have it. All right, next question is from Joshua T. Tom. In today's age, how necessary is a college education and how does that justify the debt that comes out of it? Okay, so first of all, it entirely depends on what you want to do. So the success that I've had in my life absolutely did not need to go to college. So if it's an industry where simply being better than everyone else is enough, then you don't need to go to college. However, I think that there are some people that college is wildly beneficial for and I will put myself in that category. So while the degree has not been necessary in my life in any way, shape or form, what has been necessary in my life is I was profoundly lazy. I needed people to expect things of me and put deadlines on me for me to get the momentum going that I needed to. And excuse me, while I was in college, I really began to learn how to learn and that was incredibly empowering. And I developed the systems how to in a shorter and shorter period of time to really learn and understand something. It was also very hands on, which showed me that I learned really, really well by doing that was incredibly valuable for me. So school ended up being really, really valuable. I walked away with $25,000 in debt even though I was working multiple jobs while I was in college to help pay for my way and much love to my parents for also helping me. But I did walk away with $25,000 in debt. That took me more than a decade to pay off, but that was worth it. Now, if you told me that I was going to walk away 80 or $100,000 in debt, absolutely fucking not. So that's crazy. And you're starting out behind the eight ball in such a profound way that it just. I don't know how you're ever going to get out from under that. So. But there are certain things like being a lawyer and stuff. If that is your deepest passion, then just know that you may walk away with so much debt that you have to become really incredible. And this is so interesting even to me as I'm saying this out loud. I'm saying to myself, well, I would just become a lawyer. That was making. If I owed $250,000 of the law school, then I would give myself 10 years to be making 5 million or more annually as a lawyer. And I would fucking do it. There's always a way, man. There's always a way. So the truth is, I can't even get through my own answer without saying at the end of the day, if it's one what you love and you're willing to set tremendously big goals for yourself, there is a way to make the revenue to make that back. But it's scary. And if it were my kid and that they were, they had a choice, I would not encourage them to take on say, north of 50k. Like 50k feels about right. It's going to be brutal to burn your way through that. And I would. And it's all proportionate to what are you pursuing. Like if, if you had to take 50k and you want to go be a teacher, fuck that. That would be pure insanity. Your life will be a financial misery. So I would say decide what you're going to do. Realistically, what standard are you going to hold yourself to from a pay scale perspective? Understanding that in a normal 9 to 5 job, you're going to make what the going rate is like, even if you're making 10 or 20% more than the going rate for that. Like when, how long would it take you to pay off your debt given a certain life cycle or lifestyle? So this is a math question. Run the math, figure it out. If you're super young, which I'm guessing you are, then work backwards from what do you want to do? Does it require a degree? How much debt would you have to take on to get that degree. Are you lazy? Do you need people holding you accountable? All of that and figure out what you really need to do. And if you're willing to, if you're entrepreneurial minded and you want to get out there and try and start your own business, it will almost certainly fail. So let's be very honest about that. But the money that you will spend on that, like what you'll learn in that, will be incredible. You just have to be open to the truth. All right, next question is from Sarah Bala. What advice would you give to the middle aged people out there who hit the, who hit the ground bad, feeling lost and never achieved anything meaningful? Who feels time is up? They are old and don't know what to do in life. How can they decide what to do to achieve greatness? God, I love this question. Okay, everybody, man, if you feel the that you're too old, I want you to lean in right now. I'm going to give you the secret. You ready? The only thing that matters is your neurochemical state. The game that you are playing is not money, it is not success, has nothing to do with the choices that you've made up to this point. It has everything to do with your neurochemistry. If you get your neurochemistry in the right place, you will feel good about your life right now, today. And I will tell you that one of the things that's going to change everything for you is the word you yet. So I'm not good at this yet. I haven't done anything extraordinary yet. But you can do it right now, today. So the word yet hopefully relieves you of all that pressure now. And the pressure that I'm speaking of is that whatever you've done, like let's say you're 55, let's say you're 60, let's make this real fucking tough. You're 60 years old and you're thinking, I haven't done anything with my life. My life has been a waste. Let's say that you've got five years left. You're gonna die in five years, okay? Which I think most people at 60, you're going to live another 30 or more years, especially given the state of medical science and where it's headed. But I'll just say you're going to live five. Now that may inform what you do. You're probably not going to go to law school, but you've got five years left to do something that makes you proud. And I will just tell you in the last 12 months, we've done something with Impact Theory that I am immeasurably proud of. And I've poured myself into creating content that I think helps people's lives. That's 12 months. So what can you do with five years? It all comes down to acknowledging that tomorrow isn't guaranteed for any of us. The only thing that matters is the neurochemistry. What is it that you give a shit about? And are you really going down the path of gaining mastery? When I committed to trying to pull people out of the Matrix, I was sincere about that. And I am checking myself every day as to whether or not I'm actually making progress to that. And in 12 months, I've had the best year of my life. And the best year of my life from a neurochemical standpoint. So what is it that you want to do? Let's say you're trapped in a job. Let's say you cannot retire. You can't get out. You fucking hate your job right now, today. Let's say you can't leave, which is bullshit, by the way, but I'm just gonna grant you that. You've got some story that I can't imagine where I'd actually go. Yeah, you're right. You can't leave. You can't leave. Starting right now, today. Let's say you're on your lunch break and you're watching this. When you come back from your lunch break to game your brain chemistry and get to a place where you want to be, what you're going to say is, whatever my job is, I'm going to become the greatest person of all time at my job, and I'm going to serve other people as I do that. So right now, think about the people you have this really fucking antagonistic relationship with, and it is making your workday toxic. You're going to start getting so good at your job, you're going to seek the truth. You're going to be building your ego around something antifragile, being the learner, being willing to admit when you're wrong. And you're going to get really good at your job, and you're going to start helping those people that you have, an antagonistic relationship. You're going to find out how you could do your job even better and help them. You're going to serve those people. You're going to serve the company. You're going to be. You're going to tell people what you're doing. You're going to say, I have a growth Mindset. As of right now, today, I'm going to be developing a growth mindset. And if you're sincere, sincerely on that path, two things are going to happen. One, as you develop a set of skills that serve other people, you will feel so fucking good about yourself. I cannot emphasize that enough. Building a set of skills that is unique to you, was hard to you, was hard for you to do is in an arena that you care about, you find interesting in doing that. And then helping other people, you're going to start to feel good about yourself. Now, if you can leave your job, even fucking easier. Cut your expenses to the quick, quit your job, Figure out what you need to live. What's that? Wage. Start making that wage and then quit your job. You can go to upwork o desk, which doesn't exist anymore. It's called upwork. Go somewhere like that and do work on an outsourced basis. Like, there's so many ways to make money now. You just need to understand what the absolute minimum is that you need to make. Make that, get out of your toxic job and then focus on finding that thing that is really going to light you on fire. But it is just a game of neurochemistry. It is not a game of money. It is not a game of legacy. It's not about trying to be remembered. It's about in the moment. Are you excited about what you're doing? And techni is the answer to that. So your age doesn't matter. I could have an aneurysm and die before I reach the end of this, Amma. So I. I operate in the friction between I'm going to live forever and I could die in the next 30 seconds. Right? So when you find that friction, do the things that you're going to enjoy the struggle. Do the things that tap into the pleasures that nature has given us. And one of the most profound is getting good at something. So find that thing that you want to get good at. Make progress in it. That is going to change your perception of your life. My fear is that you've got, like, I didn't become president of the United States, and that's what's fucking you up. Who cares about that? Don't worry about legacy. Worry about brain chemistry. All right, next question is from Business Mastery Academy. A damn fine name. And if your parents named you that, you're my hero or they're my hero. I guess, technically. Tom, how do you change when you're at a time in your life when you're so weak and you can't find the strength to even do the simple things. Okay, so first we need to figure out if this is an intellectual weakness or if this is a physical weakness. So I really believe that mindset is in position three. So first is diet and exercise. And the reason diet and exercise, in terms of having the energy and the passion and all of that, the reason that those two things come first is you need to optimize at a biological level. I don't want this to be true. This isn't fun or sexy to talk about. This is the truth. So you've got to optimize your physicality before you need to start worrying about mindset and the irony of ironies. As you deal with your body, your mindset is going to get to where it needs to be because you're going to start earning credibility with yourself, because one of the simplest but most difficult things that you can do is show up at the gym every day and not eat a bunch of sugar and carbohydrates. So if you start doing just those two little things day after day after day, you're going to feel really damn good about yourself from a psychological perspective, but you're also going to have more energy. And the reason you're going to have more energy is because your mitochondria are functioning better and you're actually generating more ATP. You actually have more energy in your system in order to be passionate, in order to develop your mind. So diet and exercise, hard as hell. Deadly simple. In fact, they're so simple, I will give them to you right now. Start walking. That's it. Walk a mile a day. If you're doing less than that already, just start walking a mile a day. Wear a Fitbit. Get your, you know, whatever. I'm not sure if 10,000 steps equals a mile, but they say that's sort of the minimum threshold. But I'll say do a mile. If you're walking a mile a day, you're going to love life. Do that for a couple of weeks and start walking a mile and a quarter, then a mile and a half, then two miles. Start doing that every day and just cut out sugar and carbs. If you do that, my friends, your life will transform. You will be unrecognizable, even from an inflammation standpoint. Your life will be so fucking different. You won't be able to see straight, and it is absolute madness. So give it a shot. Those are simple. Not saying they're easy, but they are very, very simple. All right, next up, Violet Christine. And this is from Facebook. Do you have routines to short circuit unproductive emotions, eg, insecurity, grief, frustration. Thinking about experimenting with TDCs. Oh, transcranial direct current stimulation, which I've heard as electromagnetic transcranial stimulation. Doesn't sound right, but anyway, that's the idea. But what do you do? So, first of all, if you do transcranial direct current stimulation, let me know how it goes. I'm utterly fascinated by that. It comes down to turning areas of the brain off, which I find interesting. For instance, people that think they can't draw, if you hit them with transcranial magnetic stimulation. Tms. There it is. If you hit them with that, then they can draw better. That's so fucking weird. That means that there's a part of your brain that's actually stopping you from drawing well. So very, very interesting, and I'd love to hear your thoughts on that. I've never done it. Do I have routines, though, to short circuit unprotective emotions? Absolutely. So a lot of this comes down to your belief systems and what I call the psychological pachinko machine. So I've got all these beliefs that, you know, negative emotions and things have to bump through. The biggest one for me is, does this move me towards my goal? So does this emotion, anger, frustration, grief, whatever, move me towards my goal? If it does, then I embrace it. If it doesn't, then I don't. So first of all, the cycles of grief, you almost certainly do need to process that grief. So what I do there is I give myself a timeline. So if I've gone through something that is really traumatizing, I'll give myself, say, a week or 10 days or a month, whatever it is, But I would never give myself more than a month, ever. I've not had my parents die, so I will say that right now my arrogant self believes that I could deal with it in a month. Maybe I couldn't. But that's certainly the thing that has worked for me with every traumatic experience up to this point that I've gone through. And I've gone through some pretty heinous ones. Every single one of them has. I've kept myself at 30 days. So that is, I think, very important to have a time limit and then to remember that you get what you focus on. And this is so right behind just having a time limit. This is the big one. So if you focus on the negativity, you're gonna get more negative things. If you start focusing on, for instance, with grief, asking, how's this the best thing that ever happened to Me. So let's say that it's the death of a parent. How is this the best thing that ever happened to me? Does it inspire me to live my life differently? Does it inspire me to help carry on the things that my parents stood for? Does it inspire me to be a better parent? Like, what are those? Like, how is it actually a good thing? How is it going to bring something beautiful to your life? Because the bad is going to be there no matter what. So wallowing in that is just not going to help you. And that holds true for everything. I just use the parent because it seems like the most extreme example. So how do you even people that get paralyzed. So for the first year, typically they find that people it's really disruptive and emotionally traumatizing, but then a year later they will actually say that it was the best thing that ever happened to them. That's the psychological immune system at work. It's getting what you focus on. It's finding ways to really be empowered by what happened. Um, even Stephen Hawking, who's completely lost the use of his body except for, ah, muscle in his cheek, which is crazy, he says that it's the reason that he's had the breakthroughs in physics that he's had. So you get what you focus on. So those are two of the big ones. All right, next question is from Cynthia Gutierrez from Facebook. What was the driving force in getting you interested in neuroscience? Can you offer a few websites, authors and research papers that you have found? Enlighten your perspective? Absolutely. Okay, so first and foremost, the thing that got me interested in it was realizing that I wanted to empower myself, that I wanted to get better, that I wanted to move towards my goals. And the things that were holding me back were my mind. So one, my belief system, and then two, my skill set. And so I needed to know, how do humans acquire skills? Neuroscience. Two, how are belief system built and how are they changed? Again, Neuroscience. So once I realized, whoa, my brain is the thing that's creating this world. So. And that brings us to the first person that I encourage all of you to read. David Eagleman. Start with his book Incognito. Absolutely fascinating. Also has a PBS show called the Brain. Check it out. And what he said is, the brain is encased in total darkness in a bone box. And from this bone box it tries to recreate through its Mr. Potential Potato Head, input devices of eyes, ears, nose, touch, all of that, it tries to recreate the world, but light never actually reaches the brain. Let that sink in for a Minute light never actually reaches the brain. So it is taking electrochemical signals and turning it into this world that you think is so real. It's creating this sense of depth. All of which is bullshit. This is all happening in your brain. Once I realized that, that's when I realized, whoa, my brain is making shit up. It's lying to me. Maybe with the best of intentions, but nonetheless, it's making this stuff up. So what is the reasoning behind that? How does that all work? What can I hijack? What's hijacking me? All of that. So that's why I got obsessed with neuroscience. Read David Eagleman, read Vs Ramachandran. Both, by the way, who've been on Impact Theory. And this is not a shameless plug for Impact Theory. They came on the show because they were the people that really shaped my thinking the most. So those two will get you started. Also, watch their episodes. Both of them are amazing. The Moran surf episode is also incredible. He's another neuroscientist. Check those three out. They will really get you started. All right, how much time do we have left? Okay, so next question is from Kevin Olson. This is on Facebook, you've stated that you only need a minimum of five hours sleep. It's actually not what I've stated. Of the little research I've done, it says 6 hours minimum for our age group. What is the truth? Thank you for everything you and your team do. You've helped me so much already. That's amazing. All right, so, Kevin, here's actually what I say. So I can get by on five to six hours sleep. That's my fantasy. Six is my magic number. If I get six hours of sleep, I'm golden. I don't have any sense of fatigue. If I get five hours one night, I'm fine. I can actually sometimes get away with a four hour night's sleep. But if I get five consistently, I start getting really tired. So it may take me a week, but eventually I start. Like, if I'm not. If I'm at five hours even consistently, if I'm really engaged intellectually, I don't have any sense of fatigue. But the second I'm not intellectually engaged, I start falling asleep. If I've gotten five hours, let's say for more than four or five nights in a row, it's super weird. I once was getting my hair cut and I was like, so you can imagine that's bad to be falling asleep during your haircut. So five hours is not the magic number for me. Six is the magic Number I love punctuating a bunch of sixes with a five here and there, because then I still don't experience fatigue. And I like to get a little sleep as I need. But I prioritize sleep. And I want people to hear that my wife sleeps eight to nine hours a night, and that's exactly what she should do. If that's how much sleep she needs, she should get it. Sleep is a good thing. Sleep helps you optimize cognitively. And optimizing cognitively for me, at the end of the day is the single most important thing you could do. So if I needed nine hours of sleep, I would get it. So I don't set an alarm. To be very clear, when I wake up at six hours, I just wake up. So that isn't me trying to sleep only six hours. All right, next question is from Christian Thomas, Facebook. When you switch to the mindset of a learner, was it an instantaneous transition, or did you take specific steps over time to grow into that mindset? So it's the one realization that I will say was an epiphany, meaning it felt like it came out of nowhere. And I realized in the bolt of lightning how true it was and that I needed to make an immediate, lasting change. But I did find myself slipping back all the time. All the time. Even now, I have to laugh at myself, at how fucking awesome it feels to be right. That's just the truth. Being right still feels amazing. Now being willing to admit when I'm wrong feels equally amazing. But even in understanding how dangerous it is to love the feeling of being right, let's all admit being right is awesome. So that's just the truth. So, yeah, you have to be very careful. And in the beginning, it was ridiculous. I was constantly sliding back. Constantly, constantly, constantly. But at least I was catching myself and I was doing it. So it's a process. All this stuff is rewiring your brain and creating a network of positivity does not happen overnight. But the decision to begin down that process does happen overnight. The decision to begin is not a process, okay? That shit is binary. You're either doing it or you're not. And that's one area that people frustrate the shit out of me is when they act like the decision when they act like the decision isn't binary. That drives me crazy. You don't need 20 years to decide to begin the process. You just begin the process right now. Okay, Next up, Catherine Benedict. Was that like a double from her or am I going crazy? Anyway, Kathryn Benedict, I'm a teacher both high school and fitness. How do I create a sense of empowerment in the students I teach? How do I create group exercises of flow? I'm entirely the wrong person to answer that question, but may I point you in the direction of the people at the flow genome. God, we were just talking. How am I blanking on this man's name? I love this guy. Jamie Wheel. Thank you, Jamie. Fly to my house and punch me in the mouth right now. I love you to bits and pieces. I can't believe I blanked on your name. That's retarded. Yeah, sorry. I know people hate that word. So Jamie Wheel is the guy behind the flow genome project. He knows all about flow. Go after that. How do you create a sense of empowerment in the students I teach? Leading by example. The growth mindset is really the right way. Not being afraid to admit when you're wrong, introducing them to the word. Yet especially when it comes to the physical fitness side, you can really show them. Like for instance, I remember in school they in PE and middle school, they had us do a pull up, which I remember when I tried to pull up, I actually thought they were joking. And because my name is B, I was one of the first people to do it. So everybody before me couldn't do it. Couldn't do it. Got to me. I was probably the third or fourth person couldn't do it and couldn't even begin to do it. And so I actually thought pull ups aren't possible. Like, why are we doing this? That's legitimately how it felt. So you can imagine my surprise when Christian Russell ended up going and doing like 22 pull ups even though he'd never done a pull up before in his life. And I was like, what just happened? So then they test you again at the end of the semester, but never once in between did they have us practice doing pull ups or trained to do pull ups. So you're literally like, what did they expect to change? So if you test them on a pull up at the beginning and the end, the middle of the semester better be all about how you get to the point where you can do not only one but 10 or 20 or however many pull ups so that then it becomes about how much work that they put in to do that. That would be an amazing reinforcer of how you can grow and get better at something which is the ultimate empowerment. So there you have it. All right. This is probably going to be the last one. Yoel Isho Hey, Tom, how do we ensure that the next generation of kids will think outside the box if they will be following the system in which we're in right now. So first and foremost, the two things that really have the biggest influence on how somebody thinks is their parents and where they grow up. So you've got a massive impact on your kids. So teaching them, showing them, leading by example, Reinforcing, reinforcing, reinforcing them. How we get better at something. Also play this content for them. Long may it serve them. So getting them to think in a certain way, that is absolutely critical. Introducing it to them. Early children's books. Jocko Willink wrote a children's book, so I haven't read it, so I can't vouch for it. But something tells me that it's going to be all about extreme ownership. So I would definitely look into that. Getting them in a martial art could be amazing, but at the end of the day, just reinforcing them over and over and over. That they can get good at something through a process, learning, getting better. That just because you start bad at something does not mean that you're going to end up that way. That humans are the ultimate adaptation machine. They can get good at anything that they're willing to put the time and energy and effort into. And just because somebody else gets better at it for faster does not mean that they can't get good at it. It doesn't even mean that they can't become the greatest in the world at it. It just may take more effort and energy on their part. All right, that's going to do it for today. Thank you guys so much for joining me. As always, it is an honor to be on here and to answer your questions. Thank you so much for submitting them. Dig the shirt. Go to shop.impacttheory.com We've got not only the shirt that I'm wearing today, which is everything is my fault, we've got a whole bunch of self signaling, empowering ideas for you to swaddle your body in and remind you of the person that you're trying to become. And until then, my friends, be legendary. Take care everybody. Thank you so much for listening. And if this content is delivering value to you, please go to itunes, go to Stitcher Rate and review us. That helps us build this community and that is what we are all about right now. Building this community as big as we can to help as many people as we can deliver as much value as possible. And you guys rating and reviewing really helps with that. Alright guys, thank you again so much. And until next time, my friends. Be legendary. Take care.