
Loading summary
Grainger Announcer
If you work in university maintenance, Grainger considers you an MVP because your playbook ensures your arena is always ready for tip off. And Grainger is your trusted partner, offering the products you need all in one place, from H VAC and plumbing supplies to lighting and more. And all delivered with plenty of time left on the clock. So your team always gets the win. Call 1-800-GRAINGER visit grainger.com or just stop by Grainger for the ones who get it done.
Commercial Narrator
When you manage procurement for multiple facilities, every order matters, but when it's for a hospital system, they matter even more. Grainger gets it and knows there's no time for managing multiple suppliers and no room for shipping delays. That's why Grainger offers millions of products in fast, dependable delivery so you can keep your facility stocked, safe and running smoothly. Call 1-800-GRAINGER Click grainger.com or just stop by Granger for the ones who get it done.
Tom Bilyeu
You're listening to the Impact Theory podcast, your source of empowering ideas and actionable techniques from the world's highest achievers. Join host Tom Bilyeu, serial entrepreneur and co founder of the billion dollar brand Quest Nutrition, on a journey to unlock your potential and realize your vision of success. Welcome to Impact Theory. All right, so welcome to today's Emma. We're doing it a little old school here. You'll have to bear with us because literally we're on fire today for anybody that lives in the LA area, man, and if you live between the 405 and like Orozcomere, our hearts are with you. This is crazy town. So literally LA is burning right now and we're not in imminent danger but we are on high alert. So bear with us. Guys. Nobody is working today from the office so Lisa and I are doing this a little old school here with two separate cameras. So what is up to Facebook and YouTube? We are going live on both but like I said, a little old school. So as people trickle in here, I'll repeat one more time and then we'll just get off to the races. That LA is literally burning. Our house is not in immediate danger but we are on very high alert as the fires are very close to us. So that's why the team isn't here today and we're. But we're still, still rocking this ammo, let me tell you. And that's why I've got my grit shirt on just to remind myself you can burn my to the ground, but that's it. After that we can rebuild, do whatever the hell. So all Right. Nobody's sweating too many bullets here. But we're not playing around. We told the team to stay home today, so. And. And to tell you guys, like, how serious this is, we actually have, like, our. We have belongings that are ready to be put in the car should the evacuation get one step closer to us. So, yeah, we're. We're not playing. Like, we've literally walked around the house going, okay, what would we be mortified if we lost? So it's pretty crazy. And I will just tell whoever's watching that we must not have gone Live on YouTube or something. It says live, but there are exactly zero people, and that's very, very surprising. So. All right. But we're going to keep walking. I can see the comments are coming in. Thank you so much for all your YouTube content. This is really testing my eyesight. Seriously. Life changing for me. Blessings on your brand and home today. Thank you, man. Really, really appreciate that. That's from Xena, I think. So. Thank you very much, milady. So, all right, we've got some questions here to start with, and they are from my boy Shah. Let's see what we have here. All right, first up, from Daniel Breeze. This is from Facebook. How important is it to have a chip on your shoulder? How would you put one there if you don't have one yet? So I'm a huge believer in having a chip on your shoulder because of its ability to serve you in acute moments. Now, that's the important thing to really understand about the chip on your shoulder is it's meant to help you in small, very small increments. It is not meant to be your eternal companion. And I think the people that overly focus on the negative are going to find themselves really, really in trouble. So you need to balance it. I think it's got to be an 80, 20 split. That's where I live. Maybe a little bit less than that. Maybe it's 85, 15, but 80 20, just to make it nice and easy. And I leverage it in those moments where things are really hard, where I just. For whatever reason, the beauty of the things that I want is not carrying me through. I'm feeling fatigued. Whatever that reason is, or quite frankly, when people are coming out of the woodwork and triggering that in me. So those are the times that I really rely on that. And they've done studies on this. It's really, really fascinating, by the way, that if you're doing a study on how to endure pain, what they found was. And they do this by submerging People' arms in a nice bucket. That if you want to increase the amount of time that they can withstand the pain by something like 30%, what you have to do is let them express anger, rage, yell, scream, swear, all of that. And then that is. That allows them to go that, you know, roughly 30% extra, which I've always found interesting. And I think other people will like me. Just sort of intuitively get that. That's certainly something that resonates a lot with me. So that is how you use the chip on your shoulder. Now the question is, does everybody need a chip on the shoulder? And honestly, I think the answer is yes. And I think that if you want to go to the edge of human capabilities, and maybe that's a better way to say it, if you want to go to the edge of human capabilities. Yes, you need a chip on your shoulder. All right. To just understand. To look inside my soul and understand how much this blue color means to me. I'm going to take a second. So look at the two screens that, yeah, that overexposed. Don't obviously mess with it now, but, like, as we move forward. So those of you on Facebook, if yours looks anything like it looks on my screen, you are enjoying the true impact theory Blue. All right, YouTube has finally joined us. I don't know what happened the first time, but forgive us. So to bring you guys up to speed. Sorry, this is super old school steelo that we're doing this here because literally, Los Angeles is on fire, much to my shock, horror, and dismay. And while our house is not in immediate danger, we are very much on the watch watch list. So we are keeping a very close eye on the mandatory evacuations as they inch towards our house. So, yeah, to give you guys an idea of how seriously, I mean that, we actually have our most valuable possessions in little piles and we have sort of a street demarcated where if they tell that street to evacuate, we'll start loading cars and get ready to get out of here. So it's getting crazy. Like, our backyard is full of soot and smoke. Uh, so it's nuts. All right, so there you have it. But nonetheless, motherfuckers, we are here rocking out this ama. We are not for play. This is how impact theory rolls. So hopefully you guys respect that. All right, so next question is from Facebook. Hi, Tom. I've been hearing about the cold shower idea and I want to try it, but I suffer from some bad back problems and I need the hot shower to loosen it up every morning. Any ideas on the things I could try to accomplish the same thing. A full disclosure, I've never done the cold shower thing, so I can't speak to whether or not that's actually something that would be valuable. And then number two, that are going to give you the same results because I've never done it, I don't really know what the result is. Now I've talked to Jared Agent Smith, AKA and he has done the cold water stuff and he says that that has been really effective for him and he forces himself to stay in the cold water until he can get his breathing under, which I thought was pretty interesting. So it could be a really good way to practice discipline, certainly a good way to practice enduring pain and a great way to get used to being cold. So all of those obviously would be very beneficial. But that's the end of any experience that I have with it. So I will go on to the next question. This one also from Dan Bro on Facebook. How do you like to plan and strategize what needs to be done to reach your goals? I am working on my why, what my true goals are, and working backwards would love your input. So there's really two fundamentally different things in there. One is your why. And that should be something that is very near and dear to you. And that the why to me is basically the same as a passion. So you want to encounter a lot of different things, things that hold interest to you, engage in those things and see if any of them turn into a true fascination. If they turn into a true fascination, then you go down the process of gaining mastery. Now, in that process, if love it enough that you're going to really keep pushing long after it gets boring, that you're going to be working to acquire those skills, even though it's hard as hell, that's a good sign that that's something that might be your why. So figuring out what your value system is, figuring out what the impact that you want to have on the world is, figuring out where you have a deep passion and finding out where all of those things align. That ultimately is your why. So oh, so much fiddling. So that's really what you want to do to figure that out. Now how do you ass what the things are that you need to do in order to actually accomplish that, that is a totally different thing, is a totally different skill set. And what I do, and this is one of those things where I'm a little distressed because I think that there's a huge difference between doing it and being good at doing it. So you've really got to get good at identifying what those things are that are actually going to move you towards your goals. Now the most important thing in that is to relentlessly self evalu whether or not you're making progress. And if you have advisors or people that you trust that can give you feedback, that helps a lot as well. But at the end of the day, what I'm really doing is I'm trying to say, okay, this is my goal. What are the things that I need to do? So I'll get really, really specific for you guys here. So at the top, what we're trying to do here at impact theory is we're trying to pull people out of the matrix. Okay, how do we pull people out of the matrix? I'm not going to walk you through my logic on this. Just trust that I believe this. So we want to pull people out of the matrix. The way to do that, I believe, is by addressing their belief system. Okay, so how do we address their belief system? In what ways is it being done now? I think that it's geography. So the people that you grow up around, I think that it's parents, the people that you're most near in your formative years. And then I think that it's your own like belief system that you are the stories that you're telling yourself in your own head. Okay, so those are the three areas your sort of the culture at large, the very near family, and then inside your own own mind. So if those are the three things that we need to address, what is the avenue that's best at doing that? And I think that for a certain type of person, it's content like this. And there's a certain number of you that actually listen to what I say and don't just get motivated and inspired. You actually go start putting this stuff to use. But I think that that's a very, very small minority of you. The majority of people, they shape their belief system because which really fast, I can't affect where you grow up, I can't affect your parents, but I can affect the things tell yourself. So that's really where we want to focus. And then doing that at scale, what's a way that we can influence the things that people tell themselves about themselves, the way they think, their belief system, their values, all of that. How can we impact that at scale? And the answer is media. So narrative. The way, the only way that humans assimilate truly disruptive information is through narrative. So I know that we're going to be in narrative. Okay, so if I know that. Then who's doing it? Well, right. So then I look at Disney. I think is doing it the best. They have the best business model. I won't go into why I think that's true, but I believe that to be true. They've certainly had just insane longevity. So they've made a lot of really great decisions that way. So that's the process of how you keep working backwards. And then ultimately, I get to the point where I'm asking myself, well, how do I become Disney? It certainly isn't by spending $100 million on a film and hoping that it goes well only to, you know, have it collapse or whatever. So that's not a good strategy. That's the fastest way to go broke. So what I would do then is I would try to find a medium that feeds into that system. Comic books, and then get really good at that. One, it's great because it's very inexpensive. Two, it's a visual medium. And three, it's a traditional way that feeds into the filmmaking system. Film, tv, all of that, which I think is the ultimate way that we really influence culture and the way that people think. Okay, so if you were just following, I get it. That's very specific to me and to what I'm doing. But if you follow the logic, right, where I'm starting, starting at something massive, I'm starting at something so big. And it was so funny. I was meeting this Hollywood guy, and we were about to have a meeting with another Hollywood person, and he was like, hey, Tom. Like, I just really want to let you know, most people, they're not. They're not motivated by your ambition. And so I was like, very true. And I'm very thankful for that reminder. And he was basically trying to say in a nice way, like, I get it, you're super inspired by having this really grand vision, but everyone just thinks you're crazy. And so that is. That's one of those things where I really believe where most people fall down is they think too small. And so I'm always trying to think just astronomically big. But you've got to show people to earn credibility with yourself, with your team, with other people that you're trying to get to do this. You've got to show them that you have an execution path. So rather than get people hyped up when I'm off camera on this whole, we're going to be bigger than Disney, it's like I'm telling them, this is what we're doing right now, today. This is what we're going to execute against and getting people excited around that. And then if I see that they share that and they understand that, then I'll start teasing out, like, sort of the grand vision of where we're going. But you ultimately have to get to. What is that thing that you're doing right now today? Okay, so that question is clearly dangerous. And I could just keep talking about that, but we have another question from. Yeah, so to everybody at YouTube. My wife hates you all. And the fact that so many people have stayed is beyond miraculous. So to hold that. Yeah, you kind of effed other than to lean if you put that standing up. Oh, because they need sound. You motherfuckers and your sound. You could turn it up. Wouldn't it work completely upside down. Yeah. Won't it just readjust for them? Nope, it won't. It says rotation is locked. Yeah, well, we tried, guys. Okay, so next question. And now you're gonna have to flip it, so rotate device back. Why is it locked? That we'd have to figure out later. Sorry, guys. Okay, so. And hey, if you're just joining us and wondering why we are fucking the cameras and why this looks hilarious, LA is literally burning. And while our house isn't in immediate danger, it is in, like, we're very, very. We're keeping a very close eye on it. So, yeah, it's pretty crazy. And they thanked you for flipping the camera. Even I now think that you just, like, have some mental disorder. How do you unlock. Everyone's telling me to unlock it. How do you do that? You'd have to go into settings. And so, unfortunately, this is a new phone, which neither of us know how to do the lock. So. So, okay, so next question is from Eric Vanden Brink. Hey, Tom. I get the feedback that my communication style is clear and unambiguous, but it's also said to be very direct. I know where this is going. And blunt, even for the Dutch. To the point I realized people can close themselves off. I am aware that working on this communication style is taking their feelings more into account, can bring benefit in business life, but at the same time, it feels like such a strong conflict with my sense of integrity. Say what you really mean, that I can't get started on it, let alone stick to it. What would you do? Okay, now I want to remind everybody he asked, what would I do? So here's the reality right now. Everyone here at Impact Theory, we all are in various stages of reading the book Principles by Ray Dalio. I highly recommend that everyone read that in fact it's required reading here at Impact Theory. And he talks about getting to truth being the highest objective. Now he also talks about how 30% of the world, even after 18 months of trying to adopt to it, simply cannot take that level of just blunt and honest discourse. And they have baseball cards, like if you guys haven't read this book, it's insane. So they have baseball cards at Bridgewater, which is the largest hedge fund in the world. They manage an unimaginable amount of money because they're that fucking good at what they do. Which is why I'm so wildly intoxicated by it. But they have baseball cards that have people stats. So what people are good at what they're not good at. Now the reason that's important is what I am doing, dear Eric, is I'm forcing other people to step up to the level of wanting that sort of naked feedback. Now I don't know if you're being a dick though. That's the only thing, and I don't encourage that. But you need to get people to really believe that candor is important. They need to believe that the highest value is to get to truth. They need to believe that it's worth sacrificing the short term sting of somebody being very direct in order to truly understand themselves. And they need to believe that their actually the worst at identifying what they're like. And so that feedback is going to have to come from the outside. So what I'm doing here is one, I'm very conscious of making sure that people feel in their gut that I want good things for them. That is critical. And until you do that, you really just can't get away with giving people that kind of blunt feedback. So that's first and foremost one thing that I've done historically is literally ask for permission to be direct. That helps, but actually it only helps very, very little because people feel put on the spot and they feel obligated to say Y. So even though secretly they mean fuck you. No, I absolutely do not want blunt feedback. So you have to be really, really careful with who you use that on. But getting people to buy into that, getting your organization to buy into that truth and then knowing that it's a process. So this is something that we're working through very consciously and somewhat slowly here at Impact Theory to make sure that everybody's on board, to make sure that people really understand where we're going, to make sure that they've all read principles so that they understand the principle behind it, that they Understand what we're trying to get to is excellence that everyone here, Impact Theory needs to hold themselves and others to a standard. So all of that stuff is really, really essential to laying that framework in order to get people to buy into that notion. Until they buy into the notion, you're never going to get away with it if you don't really bake that into the culture of your company. Make sure that everybody's on board with that, hold people to those standards and all of that and quite frankly get rid of the people that emotionally just can't handle it. Oh, and that's tough. And that's something we keep talking about here at Impact Theory. It's like statistically speaking, somebody's not going to survive the transition. That really scares me because I care so deeply about everybody on this team. But at end of the day we need truth in order to achieve what we want to achieve. So there it is. Okay, so now you want to talk about a topic that literally I just want to shut the rest of the AMA down and just talk about this because it is my absolute obsession right now, but I'll resist the urge. Okay, next question is from Marie Seeger. Question about memory and mindset. Since I started to gain true growth mindset years back, I started to rewrite myself so rapidly that I noticed losing clear grasp grasp of my past memories and felt distant from past me's. I see the logic. It's all about truly letting go and constantly updating the software of your mind. Have you had a similar experience? And how do you approach improving memory in a way that you don't miss important stuff that you feel would be bad not to remember afterwards? So first of all just journal and, and I will say that my, the way that my mind works and I used to really lament it and now I've come to really appreciate and be grateful for it. But the way that my mind works is I have sort of a sort of 15 year running window of things that I remember really clearly and then anything outside of that just really, really fades rapidly. And it's not like it's 15 years that are crystal clear. It's like you know, obviously crystal clear in the say one or two year range and then it just sort of fades ever increasingly until it's essentially gone. So journaling is huge. Journaling will help you now just in and of itself. It's super, super powerful. And then also if you're really worried that you're going to, to be unable to capture, to capture the emotional state which I think is really, really important than journaling it so that you have that really raw like in the moment, this is how I was feeling historical thing that might serve you very well. So that's the, the long and the short of that is one, I actually don't think it's bad to forget the old versions of yourself. But two, if you want to be able to recapture those things, then you would just need to journal. Okay, next is Irvin R. Sanchez. Other than the Matrix series movies, what movie would you tells the story of mindset and how unlocking your mental capabilities can greatly improve your life. You know what, before I answer that question because I really want to sip in my water, which is evaporated. Before I answer that, I want people to drop into the comments. What do you guys think? I have an answer. I have a very aggressive answer, but I want to know what other people think. So I'm going to give you like 7 seconds. Type it in right now. How would you answer that question? What movie really gives you some like, mental empowerment about how to leverage your own mind to be amazing? Amazing.
Commercial Narrator
VRBO makes it easy to claim your dream summer spot with early booking deals. From homes with pools to poolside loungers. When you book a vrbo, you don't have to reserve any loungers. They're all yours. All you have to do is book early book with vrbo. If the world were like a sleep number mattress, everything would adapt for your comfort. Because as your life changes and your body changes, sleep number mattresses adapt and shift to give you personalized comfort night after night. And now it's the final days of our everything's on sale event. Save up to $1,200 on mattresses. Our Memorial Day event ends Monday. To experience a whole new world of comfort, visit a sleep number store or go to sleepnumber.com sleep number to a good life sleep.
Tom Bilyeu
Man, these poor YouTube you people. Okay, so time's up for me. It's Star wars in no uncertain terms. That movie, if you take Yoda's advice, it will actually change your life. And I can't stress that one enough like. So first of all, Yoda basically is just eastern philosophy. So it's not like he's some unique character, but he gives it in such like this emotional pop culture fun way that it will embed itself in you. You find yourself quoting him. It's amazing, amazing, amazing. So that specifically I'll say that the Empire Strikes Back is the moneymaker there, but I think that if you watch the Jedi religion from the beginning of episode four through episode six, I think you really get a sense. So that's, for me, the answer. Thank you for asking. That's a fun question for me. All right, Johan Servo. Hi, Tom. How would you. What would you say to people who negatively judge your decision to interview Tai Lopez? I think it is important to explain your rationale behind this decision. It. It took me time to finally decide to pick whatever ideas I can from people I don't feel connected to and don't spend even a minute on criticizing the rest. Thanks a lot. Well, here's the great news, Johan. You literally just answered the question for me. But if I can throw some fucking shade at anybody that has a problem with the fact that I would interview anybody, if Mussolini would come on the show and I could pick his brain, I'd fucking pick his brain. I want to learn. And if somebody is a. First of all, I think that Ty has a lot to offer, so I don't even pass that judgment on him. Here's what I always say about Ty. I don't want to make content like Ty makes content. That's not my style of content. It's not what I'm into. The glitz, the glamour, and all of that. But he makes a very valid point, which is he wants to reach people that are between the ages of, say, I forget the numbers he used, like, 14 and 25. And so he's like, because that's my demographic, I need to speak to them in a way where they'll listen. And one of the ways to do that is to show the Lamborghinis and all that stuff, and then they're entertained, and then I can draw them in. Okay. I looked at it purely by the numbers. I'm looking at.
Commercial Narrator
At.
Tom Bilyeu
This guy is crushing it on YouTube. Absolutely crushing it. Now you can say whatever you want. He gets something on the back end from just how to grow on YouTube. Now, he's better at that than I am. That is very clear. You need to look no further than the numbers. So what he's done is very impressive, and I want to learn. So I. I am open to learning from anyone, and I want people to understand that. And here's the thing here, guys, guys, I love you, and I'm very grateful for each and every one of you that are a part of this community. Truly. Truly. And you coming here like that, that, to me, shows a real sign that you want to improve. But I'm right. Now, I'm going to tell you, if you are looking for reasons to shut someone down and not listen to them. That is stupid. And I use that word to agitate you, to get your attention, because I actually care about you, and I actually want you to do something amazing with your life, and you need to let that sting. If you're looking for reasons to shut people down, anyone. If you're looking for a reason to not listen, to ignore them, to say that they're stupid, all of that, then you've already lost. You've already lost, okay? I cannot beat this point to death. Enough. You've already lost if that's how you think you're going to lose, because you're saying, I don't give a about the message. All I care about is the messenger. That is a fool's errand, all right? You need to open yourself up to a good idea from wherever it comes. So it doesn't mean that you have to love Tai Lopez. It doesn't mean you have to want to be Tai Lopez. It just means, does Tai Lopez do something better than you? Yes or no? And if he does something better than you, then why the hell wouldn't you sit at his feet and try to learn? So, man, that is me. You're going to see that on the show all the time. If you're not into that, this is not the show for you. That's just the gospel truth. And if you ever expect me to back off from that, you're going to be sorely mistaken, because I am here to actually help people. I am here to actually pull people out of the Matrix, okay? Once you understand that so fucking real to me and that I told the team, okay, there's no cameras rolling. I told the team, I'm willing to bet my fortune to pull people out of the Matrix. I am not willing to bet my fortune to build a movie studio. Now. I love movies and I have the chills. I love movies. I love where we're headed. I'm very excited about what we're doing. The current path, like, mashes all my passions together. All of that. It's amazing. But if I ever come to believe that building a studio won't actually pull people out of the Matrix, I will right turn immediately. That is the fucking truth. Know what you're trying to accomplish and do whatever it takes to get there, kids, period. That's the end. There's nothing else. What is your goal and what do you need to do to get there? My goal is to pull people out of the Matrix. What I need to do to get there is learn from anyone who has a good idea from anyone. So please, please, if you want to be a part of this community, if you want to be a part of this community, don't look for reasons to shut people down. You can turn an episode off. You don't need to watch it. If there's somebody you have no interest in. Cool. I've got no beef with that. Don't waste my time and don't waste your time and don't waste other people's time looking for reasons to ignore someone or shut them down. Don't take the advice you think is bad. Take the advice that you think is good and move on. On. That's it. And I will be. I will rage on this one because it is so ineffective. It's ineffective. And effectiveness is what I care about. In fact, the thing that causes the most drama in my marriage is my obsession with efficiency. Do what's efficient if you want to learn, grow and get better. Take an idea from wherever it comes and be discerning. Learn what to ignore. Don't waste. In fact, I. I am. I am certain this is true. You will never see me put a comment anywhere out online. That's just negativity. You won't. Even this comment, which some people will construe as negative, is. I'm pleading with you, for your own sake, to not shut people down simply because you don't like the totality of who they are. You'll never get where you want to go if you do that. Just don't waste cycles on that. So crazy. Don't waste cycles on negativity. Don't waste cycles on no's. Find the yes. All right. That one's really tempting to go hard on. All right. Fousey herbivore. Is that really your last name? I want that to be your last name really badly. Tom, what is your view on veganism? It is not your last name. And now I know all is revealed when it comes to impacting your health, climate change, compassion and empathy towards other creatures. I'm very interested, thanks.
Commercial Narrator
Ooh.
Tom Bilyeu
So my gut instinct. I don't consider myself an expert, although I have an opinion. So let's start with that. I am not the guy to listen to about veganism. Now, having said that, I will give you my opinion, which, hey, you're free to discard if it doesn't make sense to you. I. I believe with my current amount of knowledge, that the amino acid profile in plants only is not sufficient to have the kind of longevity that I want to have. Now, I'm very open to that being Proven wrong. I've looked at this. I've gone. I've never gone vegetarian. I've certainly never gone vegan, but I've gone hard on the vegetables. Hard, hard, hard, hard, hard. And I felt worse. So I. From an empathy for other creatures. You have no idea. That would be amazing if somebody told me, like, dude, eat carrots, sugar snap peas, broccoli, all of that. And like, like. And you would be. You would live forever. I would do it 100%. Now, you either believe that about me or you don't. But 100%, if I knew that doing that meant that I would live forever, I would do it in a heartbeat. And here's the bad news. Even if it was bad for the environment, I would do it if I thought that it was going to help me live a longer, healthier life. That's terrible. I'm well aware of that. I'm not asking other people to adopt that. I'm just saying that's actually true of where I'm at in my current, current journey on this planet. So, yeah, I don't. My. My instinct is that vegetables are more important than people think, but that being a vegan or a vegetarian is ultimately bad for longevity. That. That is. I'm not the person to listen to on this, but that is my opinion. Okay, next up is from Aries Summers. When talking about extreme ownership, is there an age where you start taking ownership when speaking to someone who has experienced abuse as a child, how would you address extreme ownership? All right, so. So first of all, meeting that person with empathy, just like that, is starting point number one. Now we're going to kick over into everything as I think the diatribe that I just went on regarding the comment about people not wanting me to bring Tyler Puzzles on the show makes abundantly clear. All I care about is getting to what actually works. And so staying in the victim mentality, you have been victimized. That is very clear. Clear. Now you have a choice. Do I continue to be a victim moving forward? And I think that the only thing that makes sense is to say, absolutely not. I will in no way, shape or form spend my time there. Now, if you agree that the game you're playing isn't success, it's not money, it's brain chemistry, reliving that abuse over and over and over and thusly giving more power to the abuser, thusly living in that state and emotionally just not feeling good about yourself or whatever, whatever. Like, that seems like in an absolutely losing scenario for somebody who believes my goal is to Be happy. My goal is to enjoy my life. So if that's your goal and if you want to positively impact other people, you're not going to be able to do it from a negative state. You're only going to be able to do it if you find a way to really connect, to fall in love with yourself, to take extreme ownership for. And by the way, so let's define what extreme ownership means. Let's say you were abused very young, definitively, there's nothing that you could have done at that time, right? I mean, that just goes without saying. Second of all, even if there was something, if you didn't do it and you found yourself in that situation, continuing to beat yourself up over that makes absolutely no sense. So let's say somehow, some way, the abuse that you suffered in your life was entirely 100% your fault. You did it. Okay? Now, where I know most people go is they're going to beat themselves up. They're going to shame themselves for that. It does not make any sense. And first of all, it wasn't your fault. But even if it was like, that isn't. Extreme ownership is simply like, now that we're moving forward, what different decisions could we make in order to not find ourselves in that situation again? Or if you want to look at it, because I'll just tell you, if it were me, I would be looking at it and saying, what could I have done differently to avoid that if I was old enough, where that's even realistic? Right? So let's say that I had, oh, I went to a party and I got drunk and somebody abused me, right? Okay, well, I didn't have to go to the party. I didn't have to get drunk. That does not excuse the abuser in any way, shape or form, not even a little bit. But I'm just saying, saying that makes me feel powerful that I could have done something different. Now, the key thing to understand about my mindset and the mindset that you have to adopt is it doesn't make sense to beat yourself up over it. It doesn't make sense to feel badly about it. It doesn't make sense to sit there and wish for a better past. That's never going to happen. The past is what the past is. It happened, it's done. I'm not going to waste even a second beating myself up over it. But I do want to remain in control. So I'm going to ask, is there something that I could have done differently so I avoid that in the future? And then just making sure That I don't allow that abuse to continue to monopolize my self esteem, my vision of myself, my just chemical state. So where what I'm feeling and all of that, I'm going to take total ownership of that and I'm going to say I'm not going to let that thing that happened to me in the past, the abuse, the whatever, continue to haunt me. I'm just not. So I'm not going to think about it all the time. I'm going to do things that make me feel good about myself. So maybe I go help other people that have been abused, like whatever. I'm going to take ownership of my mental state state. That is the key thing. So take extreme ownership of your mental state regardless of what happened to you. You don't have to waste time feeling badly about it. You don't have to wallow in that. You can absolutely move on. It may be very, very difficult. It may take a lot of work. You may have to go to therapy, you may need to go help other people. Which they say in any 12 step program, the part where people really make breakthroughs is where they go help other people. Whatever it is. I would just know I need to own going and doing that because I absolutely fucking refuse to let that define my life or destroy my life. Now having said all of that, that like I'm not that expert, I'm not the guy that you should listen to on this but there are amazing, amazing people that have been through absolutely horrific things that have come out the other side and I'm basically just parroting their advice back to you. So in fact we had an episode with Wes Chapman. Go watch that somebody that lived through absolutely horrific abuse and has come out the other side, just a beautiful human being and really wanting to help people. And you can hear him basically saying all the same things that I just. So go check that out. But there are absolutely people out there that can help with that way more profoundly than I. But you get all the extreme ownership things and how they play out. All right, next up we've got TheBigDan18 who has given you the most groundbreaking piece of information through the Impact theory movement. Something you wouldn't usually hear but was so essential for how you developed your mindset. There's a lot and I probably should lock in. So when I get asked this question in like podcasts and stuff, I have a way better answer answer. But the one that I normally go to is, was given to me by my father in law whose daughter right now is, is literally holding the YouTube phone. So we all have to have some love and respect for that. And he said, there it is, there it is. He said to me, hey, Tom, in any situation, in any situation, know more about that situation than anyone else the room. I don't care what your role is. I don't care if you're the janitor, if you're lucky enough to be sitting in a meeting, know more about what's being discussed than anyone else in the room. And he said that was the secret to all of his success. And to give you a little bit of background, my father in law grew up in a tiny, tiny village. Not town, not town, village, a cluster of houses in the middle of the mountain. It's crazy. In Cyprus, which already is tiny and, and grew up there and ends up ultimately flash forward, you know, whatever, 40 years living in London and running one of the largest shipping companies in the world. I mean, just like crazy. This guy's trajectory is pure insanity. And he said he did it all because he just did that level of work. Now if you're a fan of impact theory, ask yourself, what have I become known for? I research the shit out of people. People. Why? Because I'm trying to take my father in law's advice. And that really did become the thing in business that set me apart from everybody else. Even when I was just the copywriter, I was trying to learn more about everything than anybody else, like just period. And I wanted people to know, I will bury you with what I know. And so I would come into a room, even though I didn't know about business, man, I knew as much about that situation as humanly possible. I was asking questions, I was researching things, I was doing everything that I could to get ahead of the game. So that, that is like one of the important things now that has this cascade effect. Like why I responded to principles the way that I did. My absolute obsession with finding the truth. Because once you know, now you're empowered when you have like, you just want to know more than anybody else and you know how powerful that is, suddenly you don't care where you get a good idea from, right? You'll take it from anywhere. It's just about knowing as much about that situation as possible and the way that that empowers you. So that really probably is like, even if I were to really sit back and search, probably the thing that I'm going to come back to over and over and over, especially if you're asking me a piece of advice I got from somebody else, the breakthrough that I had just sort of randomly the thought entered my mind was that it mattered what I built my self esteem around. And that was one of the biggest breakthroughs of my life. All right.
Grainger Announcer
If you work in university maintenance, Grainger considers you an MVP because your playbook ensures your arena is always ready for tip off. And Grainger is your trusted partner, offering the products you need all in one place, from H VAC and plumbing supply to lighting and more. And all delivered with plenty of time left on the clock. So your team always gets the win. Call 1-800-GRAINGER visit grainger.com or just stop by Granger for the ones who get it done,
Tom Bilyeu
take a drink here. Next question is going to be from Michael Vandergalen. Wow. All right, Michael. Personally, I am constantly challenged when it comes to rewiring my brain. I'm trying it, enjoying it, but it's like an addiction. Addiction. Somehow my mind wants to go back to the old way and even objects to new ways. How do you cope with that? How do you deal with old thought patterns and fears when they pop up, ignore them, squash them, reason it out. So to me, I. I really am a slave to my goals. And that's a really important thing to understand about me is I am always working backwards from what do I need to do to achieve my goals. And so one, I recognize that the reason that you're finding that your mind, it's like an addiction, it's going back a process called myelination. So your brain is very used to the negative thoughts. It's used to the old way of thinking. And so it's actually connected those regions of your brain into a network through myelination, which is a fatty tissue that it wraps around the connection points between the neurons so that the electricity can signal faster so that you actually become more efficient in thinking that way. It's why the process of gaining mastery works. So I understand that about my brain, and I understand that trying to tear that down isn't the right idea. Trying to build something new up, build a new network. That's the way that you want to go about it. So I know, okay, it's going to take time. And I'm not going to focus on the negative loops. I'm going to focus on reinforcing the positive loops. And one of the ways that I've gotten very effective at this is when I get into a negative loop. What I do is I let that be a habit trigger to trigger the new way of thinking. So my old way of thinking, rather than lamenting it or going down that path. As soon as I realize that I'm having those thoughts, I immediately let that trigger the new way of thinking, the new habit loop at the beginning. That's inefficient. And then it grows more efficient over time. So instead of trying to silence the negative voice in my head, I use it as a habit loop trigger. Also, I find that the negative voice in my head alerts me to something. In fact, this is important. The negative voice isn't necessarily wrong. It just has its scale off. So it's trying to tell you that something is like some huge deal and it's going to cause like the downfall of Western civilization. That's where that negative voice goes. Or it says you're a bad person or whatever. So I go, okay, your scale is way the off, but you may actually have a point. And I may need to take that seriously. So, for instance, I still get anxious before every episode of Impact theory that I. I do. But I use that anxiety to remind myself, I need to know more about this than even that person's mother. I need to research, I need to do the work. So as it's getting late and I really want to do something else, like go and like, comment on Facebook or YouTube, which is a lot more fun than, you know, doing the hard work, writing the intro or writing the intro. I really want to slack off on that. But I know that in writing the intro, I really figure out who that guest is, and so it's worth that whole process. So just understanding that the negative voice is useful, that it can be a habit loop trigger, and that while its scale is off, it actually may be pointing out something real that you need to pay attention to. So that's what I do with that stuff. All right, next is Craig and Durzen. Craig and Durzen, how do you break others out of their comfort zone? I'm thinking this can be applicable towards world events, politics, environmentalism, etc. I am not a proselyte, so that that's really important to understand about me. I'm not in the game of convincing people. I'm in the game of gathering the choir and then preaching to the choir. So, hi, choir. Welcome. So good to have you. I find that preaching to the choir is how you get people who are, maybe they're interested, but they're not, like, on fire yet on fire, and then they catch the next person on fire, so on and so forth. And that's really how you spread that message. Message versus wasting a lot of time trying to flip people who are just antagonistic to it. Now, if you understand why I want to use movies, TVs, comics, and all of that to really influence people's behavior system is because that's how I believe you ultimately influence people at scale that are antagonistic to your beliefs. But here's the thing. I'm trying to get to truth. So I don't care whether people believe what I think or not. The things that I believe are how I've been successful, both emotionally and financially. So because I have found fulfillment in my life, because I have found financial success in my life, because I feel completely capable of building things in my life on a grand scale, like, honestly, I don't give a shit if I convince other people or not. So I'm gonna put the message out for anybody that wants to avail themselves of it. It is there. And I'm willing to work myself to the fucking bone to make that information available. But I waste exactly zero energy on trying to convince people, people who don't think that I'm right, that I'm right it. That that's absurd in the extreme to me. I'm not going to waste time. So, yeah, that you're. You're never gonna, like, see me calling haters up and debating them. Like, that's such. Such a bizarre use of time to me. I would just never do that. So there it is. All right, next up. Oh, God, this name is a name and a half. Here we go. Mio drag Mickey Malenkovich. I want to drop a fucking mic right now. I've got to be really close on that. How do you start helping advising people when you were young and got no credit, but that's your domain of interest. I wouldn't. So this is really important, guys, I'm begging you, don't get confused by social media. Put your head. So we're trying to brainstorm. I'm looking at you. We're trying to brainstorm an idea here. I have a fascination with creating dating. I don't know if you guys have seen, like, there is a rash of videos on YouTube that's like. And honestly. Honestly, I have not. Like, I want to learn from these guys because they're doing something very, very right. But it's like the hey, Kalakanai here and walking you through the big house. Or even Ty is like, hey, here in my garage. Like, I want to do the antithesis of that video. I want to do a video where it is like, me and a desk and no window, and it is like, grinding the. That's the Reality. If you want to really help people, if that's really your shtick, don't focus on going out right now and like interacting with people. Focus right now on getting a set of skills that are undeniable, that are so good that people will line up at your doorstep to get you to help them. Not because you're a slick talker, right? Don't get confused just because I can talk. That. That's what this, this is. I have a set of skills. I have a set of skills. And those skills turn into dollars. Now people get real greedy about them dollars. So they will come, they will follow you, they will knock on your door, they will find you, they will seek you out. If you have no pr, it doesn't matter. They're going to find you. If you're good at getting results, everything else will take care of itself. So head down, blinders on, on in a room all by yourself with an Internet connection and fucking get good. That's the name of the game. Get so good they can't ignore you. You do that, everything else take care of itself, you will have credibility. I don't care if you're 19, if you're able to deliver results, people are going to listen. But to deliver results, you have to get good first. So we're going to make that damn video telling you that right now. Okay, next up is Alex Torres. Hi. Love what you're doing and the message you're pushing for. My question is how do you know your why, but truly know it is your why without lying to yourself? So if you want to know what drives you internally and a why should come from within, then you really need to. It's the same pattern for finding passion, encounter a bunch of things, find out the thing that starts out as an interest, really engage with it to see if it turns into a true fascination. If it turns into a fascination, go down the process of becoming the greatest in the world at that, AKA gaining mastery. And if you really look at what would it take to become the greatest in the world? So first identify who that person is and then think, how would I outperform them? What would I have to learn, know, do in order to beat them? Does that fill you with excitement? If it fills you with excitement, then you're probably on the right track. If it doesn't, don't do it. Also, what's the outcome of the thing you want to do? So the way that I think about pulling people out of the Matrix, I want to create the next 1,000 Elon Musks, okay? And by the way, in the process, at least in my current thinking with the studio, I would love every day, even if we're failing, making movies, that'd be just a lot of fun for me. And then two do. If we do it and we actually find the next 1000, Elon Musk, teach them how to think, get them out there creating the kinds of amazing, amazing companies that he's creating, then it's like, I want to live in that world. So everything about that jazzes me up. So when I think about waking up early, staying up late, grinding, grinding, grinding, to try to really contribute to that, I get very, very excited. When I think about being the greatest filmmaker in the world, I get excited. Not filmmaker, because I don't actually want to be on set, but I want, like, the greatest studio runner in the world. That's very, very exciting. Exciting to me. When I think about, like, what I'm doing now, preaching to the choir. I want to be the greatest choir preacher in the world. So when I think about getting really good at that and really getting people to take action, which is how I judge myself, like, that is really interesting to me. That's really exciting. Helping people like, you have no idea. By the way, if you ever see me in public, come say something. Come say hello, dude. Hearing about the people that I've helped, that is the Juice, Man. On the days where I'm like, really, really tired and I just want to chill and I want to wrap myself around my wife and just hang out and be an invisible dude who's trying to do nothing in the world except smell the neck of his wife, which, by the way, my wife's neck smells amazing. It's in those moments that I remember what I'm trying to really do with my life. So get on it. Find that thing. Even I fall prey to that. Create that thing. Develop that thing in your life. Fan those flames, right? This was not me at 16. I wasn't saying this stuff. So it's a process. You develop it. And just by the thing that I just laid out for you, you really can build that fire within yourself. That is your why. Okay, next question is from ML. What advice do you think your future self in three years would give to your current self? I really wish I had the answer to that question. If I had the answer to that question, I'd already be doing it. So I like to think that my three years hence self has just learned things that I can't possibly predict. Predict has gotten better at things that I can't possibly Predict. But I really try to operate on a fundamental level. So my gut instinct is that my three years hence self would just say, do more, do it faster. Of the things that I'm already doing, I'm open to that being wrong, but that's my gut instinct. All right, free box. My father is 55 years old and always complaining about being old, worn, and at the end of his life. This breaks my heart. What advice do you have to make him realize that he has a lot to live in yet? Thank you. All right, so first of all, let's not deny that the way that he feels is probably real. So I'm going to guess his diet is shit. So the first thing that we're going to do is we're going to get him eating right, we're going to get him in the gym, and then all of a sudden he's going to start feeling better. Also get his testosterone levels checked. If they're too low, he may need to be doing testosterone replacement therapy. I know everybody wants like a mindset thing here, but like when people are depressed or people are in just bad shape physically, like all the mindset stuff in the world is only going to have help them if it's pushing them to get in the gym and to make the changes that they need to make. The reality is feeling old has to do with the amount of energy that you're able to create at a cellular level. So he should be learning about mitochondria, he should be learning about ATP, he should be learning about diet, he should be learning about ketogenics, man. Because if I had to guess, inflammation is part of what makes him feel creaky and old and all that. Now beyond that, he needs a compelling future. So now we're into like pure mindset stuff. He needs to be excited about what he's to going going to do. A year is a long ass time. 5 years is insanely long. So to give you guys an idea, from a cold standing start, okay, even before we founded the company from a cold standing start, Quest Nutrition was valued at over a billion dollars. Less than seven years after the first moment we started thinking about the company. Okay, so at 55, if he can't see his seven year future, that's pretty crazy. So he needs to get excited about something that he's building. He needs to get excited about his ability to contribute to the world and to other people. And he needs to research this concept from the ancient Greeks called Techni, which is, I have developed a set of skills. They were very hard to develop. They are very unique to me and they are of service. This is the important part. They are of service to other people. Once you have a set of skills that are unique to you that you've worked your ass off to acquire that you were really excited about, that acquiring them was fun. You love being good at this and it serves other people. That's when life gets really interesting. All right, so that's what dad should do. Dad needs to get on that shit because, man, he's got a lot of time. But start with diet, exercise, then mindset. All right, man, man, man, man. That's what we call our daughter. So amazing. So, man, man, you have an instant place in our heart. And I don't know if you guys could hear off camera my wife doing her awe, but we're both very touched. What steps should you take if you are burnt out from the passion you currently have? Take a vacation. So people are super fucking weird about taking vacations. I don't understand that. So if the burnout is because you misjudged and you actually don't give a shit about it, you're gonna have to be honest with yourself. But like, if it's just literally, I just need a break. Take a break. Like, go do nothing. Go on a vacation. Go read a fiction book. Take two weeks off, take a month off, take six, six months off. Like, if you can afford it, do it. Like, do whatever you need to do to reconnect. Re. Get excited. There's no moral obligation to go out and chase the passion. There's just not. So your life comes down to, you should enjoy your life. That's it. There you go. Period. That's the end of that statement. There's not something more. So you should enjoy your life and you should optimize your life around really feeling good about it. Now. It just so happens that usually for people to enjoy their life, it's about doing something they're proud of, becoming someone they're proud of, proud of and helping other people. It's just like how humans are wired because we're social animals. And so those are the things that are sort of innate to us. So I think everybody benefits from that. But like, do the things you need to do to feel good, to enjoy the day to day. So find a way to tap into that to get excited about the future. Get excited about the things you're doing. And if you're leaving it all out on the field. And this is what I always tell people. Like, I'm so, so not bashful when I want to take a vacation. I take a vacation. Like, for instance, if LA stops burning, which, by the way, for anybody just joining us, that's why we're doing the dual phone action here instead of the normal way that we do this. LA is literally burning. And while our house isn't in immediate danger, we're keeping a very, very keen eye. Next is distressingly close to our house. So we're supposed to leave tonight for New York, but if they don't put out the fire, we're gonna have to stay. But I'm like, man, when I hit New York, that's it. Like, I'm on vacation. My wife and I are in full Christmas mode. We are total Christmas psychos. I'm not, like, in any way, shape or form shamed about that. We had an opportunity to do a business meeting while we're in New York. I was like that. Like, absolutely not. This is vacation. Gonna chill with my wife. This is our yearly sojourn to New York to see all the Christmas items I love the most. But I play so hard every day that I just am not. I don't. I have literally negative amounts of guilt about taking time off. So if you play that hard, you won't have any trouble taking time off. All right. Serenity tv. What is up, homie? You know that you're a thriving part of this community. Tom, what books would you recommend that are specific to creating a scalable food business? Also, any recommendations for community culture building? I've read the reading list, and they were amazing. Well, first of all, mad respect to you for reading that. Those are certainly the. I think it's 27 books long. The 27 most powerful books I can think of. Ray Dalio's Principles coming soon. That's going to be high, high, high on the list. So for a food business, honestly, go research the microbiome. I think that's the frontier of food. And I think anybody starting food company now, if you don't understand the microbiome and the different food and its effect on that, like, you're just fucked. So that's probably not the answer you're looking for. You probably want a business book. But honestly, I think the real answer is you're going to need to make a product that is just unparalleled. And to do that, I think you need to understand the microbiome and where it's going and all the trouble and why we're having so much trouble with it and all the ways that's going to echo through everybody's life. Whoa. We have, like 30 seconds left, so, yeah, I'm going to end there. All right, guys, thank you so much. Wow. The time really snuck up on me on this one. So thank you guys so much for joining us. Thank you for your patience at the beginning of this. We did get off to a very rocky start because of the fire. We are. We're going to be keeping a close eye on it. Don't worry about us. We are gritty as all hell. Which, by the way, go to shop.impacttheory.com right now. Self signaling, boys and girls. I push this not only because I want this company to make a just metric ton of money, but also because I actually believe in self signaling. Literally, if you want to know why I put the shirt on today as I was getting dressed and everybody's like, freaking out about the fire. No one's in the office today, by the way, because literally the hills are on fire. And I thought, what? What do I need to be reminded of today? And I was like, I need to be reminded that I'm gritty, that no matter what the fuck happens, I will bounce back from this. I will push through. And so I grabbed the shirt. So that's actually why we made these shirts. So we work backwards. What's the effect that we're trying to have? And then we create merch around that. But go right next. Now, if you're a gritty motherfucker and get yourself one of these shirts, get in there. Shop.impacttheory.com also makes an amazing gift for somebody on your Christmas list. So go get a grit shirt for yourself. Get one for somebody else. Get gritty. Thank you guys so much for joining us as always, and thank you for being a part of the choir. And if you haven't already, be sure to subscribe here. And until next time, my friends, switch on notifications. Why switch on notifications? People can get you live. Some people are excited that they caught you live. Nice. Yeah, guys, come on. So Switch on the YouTube and Facebook notifications so that when we go live, you get notified. That would be amazing. I would definitely consider that a wonderful act of kindness. By the way, have you seen how fast we're growing? It's insanity. So to give you guys an idea of how fast we are growing on YouTube, it took us about what we say nine months to go from zero to a hundred thousand. Then it took us 10 and a half weeks to do an additional 6,60,000. That's crazy. So super fast growth. All thanks to you guys. Thank you so much. For being a part of this community. We are beyond grateful. Share the word spread. Share. Tell people what we're doing. That helps immeasurably. All right, thanks for joining us guys and until next time, be legendary. Take care everybody. Thank you so much for listening. And if this content is delivering value to you, please go to itunes, go to Stitcher Rate and review. That helps us build this community and that is what we are all about right now. Building this community as big as we can to help as many people as we can deliver as much value as possible. And you guys rating and reviewing really helps with that. Alright guys, thank you again so much and until next time my friends, be legendary. Take care now. Audible gives you audiobooks, podcasts, Audible originals and more all in one place. Whether you want to dive into a series, listen to a popular bestseller, or check out the latest episode of a great new podcast, Audible has you covered. Enjoy genres you love like motivation, mysteries and sci fi. Follow names you know in comedy or true crime podcasts, or discover the Audible exclusive. Everyone's talking about the Sandman. The new Audible is your playlist for life. Try it for 30 days on us. Visit audible.com.
Podcast Date: April 5, 2024
Host: Tom Bilyeu
Episode Theme: Commitment, mindset, truth-seeking, and actionable advice for thriving in a disruptive world
In this replay of an AMA (Ask Me Anything) episode, Tom Bilyeu, co-founder of Quest Nutrition and host of Impact Theory, answers real-time listener questions on mindset, goal-setting, emotional resilience, personal growth, and the pursuit of truth. The episode takes place against the backdrop of Los Angeles wildfires, infusing the conversation with Tom’s characteristic grit and authenticity. Tom tackles diverse topics—from the benefits of having a “chip on your shoulder” to the importance of truth, what it means to take extreme ownership, and how to approach learning from those you may not agree with.
[01:00 – 03:00]
[04:00 – 06:30]
[07:00 – 08:00]
[09:00 – 14:00]
[16:00 – 19:00]
[20:00 – 22:00]
[22:30 – 23:00]
[24:00 – 27:00]
[29:00 – 31:00]
[31:00 – 35:00]
[36:00 – 38:00]
[38:51 – 41:00]
[42:00 – 44:00]
[44:00 – 46:00]
[46:00 – 48:00]
[50:00 – 52:00]
[53:00 – 55:00]
[56:00 – 57:30]
This AMA episode distills Tom Bilyeu’s no-BS philosophy: Think big, pursue the truth with obsession, learn from everyone, put passion into action through relentless preparation, and unapologetically protect your energy. Listeners are challenged to “commit,” take ownership, and focus on effectiveness rather than image or ego—critical skills for anyone navigating a disruptive world.
For listeners who want actionable, direct advice on success and mindset—even amid chaos—this is essential Impact Theory.