← Tony Mantor's : Almost Live..... Nashville
Tony Mantor's : Almost Live..... Nashville
Transforming Lives: How Doors of Change Rescues Homeless Youth
00:29:34
Jeffrey Sitkov and Justine Yildiz share the powerful story of Doors of Change, a nonprofit that has helped over 2,900 homeless youth find housing and essential services since 2001. Through their innovative Homeless Youth Advocacy Program, they're transforming lives by building trust with vulnerable young people and connecting them with the resources needed to leave street life behind. • Approximately 4.2 million youth between 17-24 are homeless in America today • 40% of homeless youth ...
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- [00:01]
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- [01:13]
Tony Mantour
My career in the entertainment industry has enabled me to work with a diverse range of talent. Through my years of experience, I've recognized two essential industry professionals. Whether famous stars, our behind the scenes staff have fascinating stories to tell. Secondly, audiences are eager to listen to these stories which offer a glimpse into their lives and the evolution of their life stories. This podcast aims to share these narratives, providing information on how they evolve into their chosen career. We will delve into their journey to stardom, discuss their struggles and successes, and hear from people who help them achieve their goals. Get ready for intriguing behind the scenes stories and insights into the fascinating, fascinating world of entertainment. Hi, I'm Tony Mantour. Welcome to Almost Live Nashville. Joining us today is Jeffrey Sitkov and Justine Yildiz. Jeffrey is president and founder of Doors of Change, which has been transforming the lives of homeless youth since it was established in 2001. It's such a great story. They have such great information and we're proud to have them joining us today. So how's it going today for you?
- [02:30]
Jeffrey Sitkov
Going great. We appreciate you getting the word out for us.
- [02:33]
Tony Mantour
Oh, it's my pleasure. I thoroughly enjoy helping people any way that I possibly can.
- [02:39]
Jeffrey Sitkov
Appreciate it.
- [02:40]
Tony Mantour
So if you would tell us a little bit about what you do and how it all started.
- [02:44]
Jeffrey Sitkov
Well, Doors of Change is a nonprofit organization that I founded 24 years ago to help homeless youth get off the streets in Southern California. And we're blessed to have now helped over 2,900 get housing or shelter and the services they need to become self sufficient.
- [03:05]
Tony Mantour
Oh, that's really nice to hear. So what have you seen with Doors of Change over the last 24, 25 years in how it's working?
- [03:15]
Jeffrey Sitkov
Well, Justine is a prime example of this success, because when I met her, she was 16 years old and she was on the streets for four years, and now she graduated law school, as she'll talk about. But we have many success stories. But, you know, it's really building trust, Tony, with these youth, because people always ask me, why are these kids on the streets? There's 4.2 million youth that are homeless in America today between 17 and 24. 40% of them are LGBTQ + kids that come out to their families and within an hour usually get kicked down the streets with nothing. 60% are from such dysfunctional families. Their parents are mentally ill. They are drug addicts or alcoholics. It's so unsafe for the youth to be in their house. It's actually safer for them to be on the streets. So building trust is the number one thing we must do quickly with these youth. And once we do, they want to get help. They want to get off the streets.
- [04:15]
Tony Mantour
Yeah. That's good that you're doing this now. Justine, how long has it been since you first met Jeffrey?
- [04:21]
Justine Yildiz
It was about 18 years ago.
- [04:23]
Tony Mantour
Okay, so how did that happen? How did you meet? How did you form this relationship that's been going for so long? Can you give us a little of your journey along the way?
- [04:34]
Justine Yildiz
Sure. So, as Jeffrey had mentioned, I was a preteen runaway. I ran away from home when I was 12, and I spent a few years on the streets, and they got picked up by a police officer that took me to a homeless shelter for teens. And they had a lot of programs that were being funded by Doors of Change there. So I was able to get mental health services, those kind of things. And I met Jeffrey there, you know, through. He was always a hands on kind of guy, so he'd be there at the shelter and speak with us. And I guess he saw something in me because he asked me if I would like to speak. So I ended up giving my first speech, the Doors have Changed concert, and then I did a lot of other events. And pretty much since then, I haven't been able to say no to Jeffrey. He's got a really big heart. I love working with him, and any opportunity that he presents to me to tell my story and to help other youth, I always jump at the opportunity.
- [05:33]
Tony Mantour
So if you would tell me a Little bit more. You say that you left at 12. You brought up the term mental health. Did you have some mental health issues? Were you having problems dealing with this? And did this all help you so you could move forward with what you're doing today?
- [05:49]
Justine Yildiz
Yeah. So, I mean it. Obviously a lot of the youth that are coming from these situations do have mental health problems, maybe ones that existed before, certainly after having bad experiences. For me, I did have a lot of issues. I was one of the few youth that I didn't use drugs or alcohol. I didn't develop any addictions to anything. But that also meant that I was feeling everything and seeing everything that was happening to me. I didn't have a filter or anything to numb it. So because of that, I did need those services badly.
- [06:23]
Tony Mantour
So. So, Jeffrey, what, what, what did you see in Justine that you said, okay, I've got to see what I can do to develop her and, and help her along? What, what was some of those. Those things that just, you know, lit like light bull.
- [06:43]
Jeffrey Sitkov
Well, number one, any of the youth, Tony, that we actually work with, we work with thousands of youth. We are open to any youth that wants to have help. It doesn't matter what their background is. If they're between 17 and 24 and they're homeless or one step from being homeless, we will help them for free. If any youth wants to get help, we want to give it to them. Justine, when I first met her, was very standoffish because she didn't trust anybody. But it was our music and art program that really opened her up. We had an award winning music and ART program for 18 years that existed before COVID After Covid, we had to change the program, actually shut it down. It's been shut down ever since, but we pivoted. And actually we've been more successful now after Covid than before COVID But to answer your question, you know, once that Justine started the program and she realized that we were there to help her, you know, she asked me if we could help her with art. And she loved art and we had an art and music program. And she went into the art program and really excelled in it tremendously. And you could see her self esteem improving. She learned how to, you know, use how to make jewelry, which she made for 18, 20 years now, and support herself through school. And to be self sufficient, trust is a big thing.
- [08:01]
Tony Mantour
But do you get a lot of that just starting out?
- [08:04]
Jeffrey Sitkov
It doesn't really matter. Any of the youth that come into us, they don't trust anybody. We're Very open to them. We're non judgmental, we're loving and supportive, but we meet them where they are. Because sometimes a youth will not want to get housing initially. They just don't trust anybody. And slowly but surely as we get them services that they need, it could be getting them on medi Cal, it could be getting their ID so they can get work, it could be getting mental health support. Whatever they need, we give them. And slowly they will come along and you know, eventually many of them will want housing and we get them housing. But no matter who it is, as long as they are open to help, we want to help them. And you got to be open to these kids and meet them where they are because if not, they will turn off and they'll move away. But we always are open to these youth and nonjudgmental. And if anybody's listening right now and thinking, you know, wow, I didn't realize this. The biggest thing that I've learned in 24 years is that most people do not know how severe the homeless youth issue is in America today. You know, 4.2 million youth are on the streets and that's a lot and is growing. And so once you can educate them about the issue and about what we do, we have an extremely successful program. The Homeless Youth Advocacy program came out of COVID and it's been more successful now than we've ever been before. In the last four years alone, we've housed 966 youth over the last four years alone, of which 199 are in permanent housing. So they're self sufficient, they're in permanent housing. Their role models, like Justine, she's a tremendous role model that give hope to these youth that they can succeed. And so if anybody's listening to this that wants to help, they can always go to our website, doors of change.org. doors is plural. Doors of change.org find out what we do to watch the videos. And even though we work in San Diego only right now, we have kids from all over the United States that come to us because they can live outside all year round, which they can in Buffalo, Detroit, maybe Tennessee, all these areas. They come to San Diego because they can live outside. And so we help them from wherever they're from.
- [10:22]
Tony Mantour
Okay, you bring up Doors of Change. Now is that a physical place where people can come or is it Internet? How does that all operate?
- [10:32]
Jeffrey Sitkov
It's actually a program that, the Homeless Youth Advocacy Program. We're all remote right now because we had to close our, you know, award winning music in Our program. And we found, listen, it's less expensive than to have a facility to work remotely. And we actually meet the youth. We speak to them on the phone, we speak to them on the computer. We very quickly get in the services that they need. And by doing that, they start trusting us quickly. We're 247 coverage. They can call it to 2 in the morning and we have one of our staff, they'll pick up the phone and talk to them, which is very rare.
- [11:08]
Tony Mantour
Yeah, so true. That is very rare. Now, do you actually go out on the streets and meet them? This way they can gain your trust and you meet them where they are?
- [11:20]
Jeffrey Sitkov
Yes, we actually go to them. Our case management will go to them, wherever they are, meet them. Usually the next day that we talk to them and get them the services that they need. We ask them if we can evaluate them to see what will help them. Once they give us the approval that we can evaluate them and have an assessment with them, we found out all ways that we can maybe help them. We bring it up to them, and sometimes they say, yes, I need that something. They say, I'm not ready for it right now. But whatever it is, we meet them where they are, and we actually meet them wherever they are on the streets. We come to meet them and get them the resources they need. We actually deliver them to mental health to go to, you know, get their IDs, get MEDI, CAL, etc. We will take them or get them Ubers to go there, etc.
- [12:05]
Tony Mantour
Yeah. Now, Justine, the one good thing that you have is that you have lived experience, you've been there. Now, how do you get it across to them? Because lots of times they'll hear, yeah, I understand where you've been. But they really, in the back of their minds, think that you don't now you have. So how do you get it across to them that you understand them, you've been there, you've done it, so that they can gain your trust and you can gain theirs.
- [12:35]
Justine Yildiz
Well, Jeffrey has a lot of these great pictures of me from when I was younger. So anybody that doesn't believe that I was a street punk, I have photo evidence to prove that. And I think overall, there's a certain tone, a certain slang code switching, if you will, that can occur. If I'm alone with a youth that has had similar experiences, I am able to step a little bit out of that professional status and, you know, have that connection with them. Because I have slept out in the rain, I have hid from the police, I've done all these things that a lot of these kids have gone through. They just wouldn't know that looking at me or hearing me speak unless they heard my story. That connection is still there and it's still pretty easy for me to make even in my current situation.
- [13:28]
Tony Mantour
Have you found that when they might question you, they just think that you go and blah, blah, blah, blah. You don't really understand what they're going through at that point in time. So does your lived experience that you can put across them create that bridge so that you can gain their trust on it?
- [13:47]
Justine Yildiz
Well, thankfully I haven't had any youth I can think of that really doubted me and doubted my story.
- [13:54]
Tony Mantour
Nice.
- [13:55]
Justine Yildiz
I think there's a lot of other things that come into play though, because you know, me thinking about, you know, the intersectionality of it is I'm a white woman that has gone through that. I was a little blonde girl going through that. So sometimes it may be more difficult from someone with a different background to identify with that part. But I've still been able to bridge that gap most of the time where, you know, there is always common ground regardless.
- [14:21]
Tony Mantour
Oh, that's just so good. Now, Jeffrey, what are some of the things. Actually, before I get to that, let me ask this question. How many people do you have this actually working at Doors of Change?
- [14:35]
Jeffrey Sitkov
Sure. We have presently we have six full time employees. We have two 20 hour week employees, so we have eight on our staff, plus many volunteers that help us. That includes case managers, a program director, myself. And we're very blessed to have these people that really are so passionate about this cause. And people can tell when you talk to them. They can tell if you're being legitimate or not or real. They can just see it in your eyes and they can hear it when you speak. Everybody that I work with, they're so gung ho. They're so passionate because they've seen the results like they've seen Justine, they've seen Matthew, they've seen Tyler, they've seen all these different youth that we work with over the years grow and you know, and because of that, they want to help more youth have a better life. The youth have to work hard. They have to want to help themselves. But if they do, they will succeed.
- [15:34]
Tony Mantour
That gives them a great pathway for sure. Now a lot of these kids come from broken homes and just so many different areas that are just completely overwhelming to some people. So I'm sure they must have a huge amount of trust issues. Plus they might have drug issues, adhd, bipolar, autism, schizophrenia, Any one of those things. That's a tough challenge for you. How can you break that down in such a way that, number one, you're really trying to help them? And number two, see that there is a pathway that they can go to to get the help that is needed, because it's kind of. And I hate to make it this kind of an analogy, but it's kind of like when you find a dog or an animal that's been beaten down so badly and it takes so long to get their trust back because of their life pattern. And it must be really hard to get them to understand that you're coming from a side of compassion. Their trust can be so deep set that it's really hard to break that barrier. How do you do that? Because that is a very tough road to take.
- [16:50]
Jeffrey Sitkov
Well, I will share with you, number one, Tony, that is a great question, because that's the crux of everything. If they do not trust us, they're not going to ask for help. And so we are truly experts at developing trust very quickly. How we do that. Number one, we have 24, 7 coverage, so any time that they contact us, we will get in touch with them very quickly. Number two, once we do get in contact with them, we follow through with our word very quickly. The immediacy that we show them and makes them realize, whoa, we are different than what they've had before because it is very hard for them to trust anybody. And so they will watch you for months and months and months to make sure, you know, what are they really trying to get from me? And so by following through with our word, by being consistent and persistent in what we do, and by being, you know, accepting of whoever they are without judgmental, and that's a huge thing. We're not judgmental of them. We accept them for who they are, whether they're strength or gay. It doesn't matter who they are, what religion, what ethnicity, where they're from. We accept all these youth where they are. And by doing that, creating a space, it develops trust a lot quicker. And then they meet youth like Justine. When they go to our concerts, which we have concerts every year, they will meet other youth that have succeeded in the program. And they talk to them and they really like, wow, you know, this person now are, you know, they're an engineer. This person is now working for an ambulance service as a supervisor and graduated law school. All these different things. It really makes them realize, hey, I'm with the right organization. They are coming through at their word. And that's why? We've been very successful because we are who we say we are, and they see that very quickly.
- [18:39]
Tony Mantour
Oh, that's so good. Now, you mentioned concerts. Have you got any concerts coming up?
- [18:44]
Jeffrey Sitkov
Yes, we do. And I just wanted to say, number one, I really appreciate Justine taking her time. She works full time, and it's that easy for her to do these interviews. But you know something, she is such an angel for these youth, Tony, because she always is open to helping others, and she's an example of success, and so we're so appreciative. By the way, in 24 years, she's the first ex homeless youth, former homeless youth that is now on our board of directors.
- [19:12]
Tony Mantour
Oh, wow, that's nice.
- [19:14]
Jeffrey Sitkov
So we're very proud of Justine and we appreciate all of the help that she's giving. So question again, please.
- [19:21]
Tony Mantour
Actually, I'm going to change that to tell us how the music business support you.
- [19:26]
Jeffrey Sitkov
I know that Nashville is where you're from. Just to let you know, the music industry has been very supportive of what we've done for 24 years. Elton John and Billy Joel were the first two music angels that trusted me. And once they started Simon memorabilia, it opened the floodgates. And I want to let you know that I know Nashville is all country. The Dixie Chicks, Willie Nelson, Shania Twain are three of our angels of many, many other music angels that have helped us sign memorabilia and raise almost $900,000 to fund our program in 24 years. So, yes, music is a big thing on what we do.
- [20:06]
Tony Mantour
That's just great. I'm so glad that everybody helps you out, because that's a tremendous cause. What else do you do during the year besides the music? What you would have that you go out there that helps raise money?
- [20:20]
Jeffrey Sitkov
Primarily, we do a lot of speaking engagements. I just spoke at Rotary just now, two hours ago. And, you know, whether it's quantitative, Rotary, all different organizations, by educating that people about the homeless issue, most people have no idea of the severity of this issue in the United States. And in San Diego alone, We've got over 3,000 kids on the streets in our community alone, every community, Nashville, all communities in the United States have homeless youth. And so by educating them, and that's the biggest thing we do, is educate the community. And then once they educate them, they will give us donations, they'll help us, they'll volunteer with us. But most importantly, it's getting these youth the resources they need, including housing, which we've done in the last four years. 966 youth have gotten Housing as a result of doors of change.
- [21:11]
Tony Mantour
Oh, that's great. So Justine, now coming from the streets to where you are today, what do you think people need to hear that they just would not understand, but you can tell them because you've been there.
- [21:30]
Justine Yildiz
That's a tough question. I think a lot of people take for granted how nice today is to have clean socks and clean underwear. Pretty straightforward. But I think a lot of people that have never lived that kind of lifestyle don't understand what small privileges exist in their lives that we all take for granted.
- [21:51]
Tony Mantour
Yeah, it may be straightforward, but if it's the truth, it's the truth. Now, Jeffrey, from an organization, what do you think is very important that you think our listeners just need to hear about what it is that you're trying to do and are doing?
- [22:10]
Jeffrey Sitkov
I think the biggest thing I need to tell people is that you can make a difference. People always say, you know, can I really? With my donation, I give $100. Is it really going to make a difference? I'm here to say yes, it will because we've helped 23,000 youth over 24 years now get services that they need to have a better life. Remember, these kids don't want to be homeless. And so once they're homeless, we can help them get off the streets. But until they get off the streets, we still got to get many services to them to build trust, to build, you know, a good reputation with them that yes, we, we do want to help them. And getting just things like basic skills like how do you interview for job? We actually do job interview skills. We actually go out and buy clothes for them to be able to go and have an interview so they'll look good and they'll get the job. You know, we transfer for them anywhere they need to go to get a resource such as mental health, such as medical, such as job skills, job interviews, etc. Will pay for all that. So what I'm here to tell people is that you can make a difference. As little as $18 a month, an angel team member, you truly can help save these kids lives. I think that's the biggest thing because people, there's so many causes out there, you know, who, what do I support? To me, what is going to give you the biggest bang for your buck? And the youth are our future. And we've got four and a half million youth that are on the streets that don't want to be there. Help them get off the streets so they can be role models for others. Give them hope that they can have A better life with hard work, though, Joanie, they have to work hard to get off the street. Justine has worked her butt off, you know, over 18 years to be where she is. So it's not easy. But there is a way out and they can do it, and we applaud them for doing it.
- [24:02]
Tony Mantour
Did you have, and I'm sure you've had several, but did you have one that when you first met them, him or her, you just kind of said, no. Attitude, trust issues, this isn't going to work. Then for whatever reason, it just kicked in, clicked in, everything started working and it was a success story.
- [24:28]
Jeffrey Sitkov
Well, that is a great question. Also, I will be honest and tell you, of the thousands and thousands of kids I work with, Justine has probably touched me more than any of them. Why? Because when I met her, she was on suicide watch for six months. She tried to kill herself twice. She was so depressed, she didn't look at me in the eye for two months. That's the only youth I've ever worked at that didn't look at me in the eye within the first week or two. It took her two months to look at me in the eyes. So to see where she's come from to where she is now, it's the greatest turnaround I have ever seen in 24 years. We have many other success stories, but this is probably the greatest of any of them, because where she came from, Sergio, by the way, had cancer on top of everything. And he's another tremendous success story, you know that. Now, is he homeless at 12 years old because his parents were addicts? He now had cancer and was going through chemotherapy. Do you know that he wants to be a dentist? He's in college full time now, and he's on his way to becoming a dentist, and he will be a dentist. So those two youth of anybody were so on the other side and where they are now, it's completely 180, 360 degree turn.
- [25:41]
Tony Mantour
Oh, that's great. Now, Justine, he just brought up something that's very distressing to a lot of people. That's suicide watch. Now, I've spoken with several people that have contemplated suicide. It's a very deep, deep depression that is probably one of the toughest roads to come back from, because you've thought about suicide, you've tried it a couple of times. So with all that was going on, how did you get to that better place and how did you win that fight?
- [26:15]
Justine Yildiz
It was really the attention and the love and the care that I received from the staff and from Jeffrey and I made very personal connections with, you know, the people that were working there. And my therapist. My therapist really had a close bond with me, and she really believed in me. And also my expressive arts therapist is. She knocked some sense into me and said, look, Justine, you're smart, you're talented. There's nothing that can hold you back. After hearing so many people tell me that my life was valuable, that I was smart, that I was someone worthy of love and attention, somebody that could be something in this world, you know, you can't ignore that. When you have so many people telling you that, at some point, you're going to have to believe it. And that's what happened with me, is I got out of that because everyone around me kept telling me that I was too good for that kind of life to be depressed and to, you know, feel that I needed to end things. So I believed them when they told me that I could do anything, and I did.
- [27:25]
Tony Mantour
So was it a slow progress getting from point A to point B? What time span did it take you so that you knew where you was headed and it was the correct way to go?
- [27:37]
Justine Yildiz
Well, that's kind of a difficult trajectory. I saw my therapist for 10 years, and I saw her on a weekly basis. So that is the amount of work that it takes to fully get out of that mindset. A decade of dedicated therapy and trying different things, you know, with the same person working through the case with me. So I have been able to overcome a lot of my mental health issues. I still do have some, and I am still being treated for those and probably will continue to be treated for them for the rest of my life. That's just, you know, there's a physiological aspect to it when you're living in fight or flight. So some of those things, therapy won't really help, but I definitely got out of it because of those mental health services. And I think it's the same for a lot of youth. Once they have a therapist that they trust, that person can change the world for them.
- [28:36]
Tony Mantour
Yeah, that's just tremendous information for people to hear. Now, Jeffrey, one last thing. What would you like to tell people that they really, truly need to hear from you?
- [28:47]
Jeffrey Sitkov
If you're touched by what you hear, you have an opportunity to be able to make a huge difference in so many homeless youth. I'll go to doors of change.org, doors is plural. Watch the videos on there, listen to the youth, and then make a donation. Help us so we can help more kids have the services that Justine got and that Tyler got and Matthew got and Sergio got and many, many others so we can get these kids a better life and they can be the role models. They give the hope for all the other homeless youth that see. Hey, listen, there's a way you can get off the streets with hard work. And I just want to thank you, Tony, for helping us get the word out. And please, I'm asking someone if you are touched by this. If you don't take action, it doesn't mean a damn thing. You have to take action for it to get a different result. And we ask you to please, whatever you can give, any $10, $15, a thousand dollars, whatever you can do, I guarantee you that money will go to where you want to go to get kids a better life with hard work. And I really appreciate them being interested and, and for listening to this interview.
- [29:55]
Tony Mantour
Well, it's been great conversation, great information. I really appreciate you both taking the time to come on.
- [30:01]
Justine Yildiz
Thanks, Tony.
- [30:02]
Jeffrey Sitkov
Thanks for having us, Tony. Really appreciate it.
- [30:04]
Tony Mantour
It's been my pleasure. Thanks again. Thanks for joining us today. Today, we hope you enjoyed the show. This has been a Tony Mantour production. For more information, contact media at platomusic. Com.