MUSICALS that MAGA hates (and we LOVE ❤️) | TMT 170

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Musicals That MAGA Hates (and We LOVE ❤️)"

Too Many Tabs with Pearlmania500 – Episode 170 (March 29, 2026)

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Episode Overview

In this lively episode, husband-and-wife duo Pearlmania500 and Mrs. P explore what right-wing, MAGA-aligned Christians think of popular musicals—especially the "gayest and greatest" ones that the hosts love. Guided by reviews from the Christian website Movieguide.org, the two dissect how conservative culture warriors rate (and often fear) the colorful, exuberant, and diverse world of movie musicals. Their journey is a hilarious, insightful look at both the musicals themselves and the worldview of those reviewing them.

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Major Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Premise: Broadway, MAGA, and Movieguide.org ([01:00–05:00])

• Opening Joke: MAGA conservatives are "famously afraid of cities" and "terrified of Broadway," so they miss out on musical theater—except on streaming or VHS, watched separately and "not making eye contact."
  • "They might have to walk past Times Square Elmo." (A, 01:11)
• Introduction of Movieguide.org:
  • A Christian media review site created "to evaluate content for violence, sex, and language through a Christian biblical lens to help families make informed movie choices." (B, 03:56–04:20)
• Method: Hosts list favorite musicals (with movie versions) and examine their Movieguide.org reviews for family-friendliness, “redemptive” qualities, and, more humorously, what triggers MAGA-oriented reviewers.

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2. Deep Dives into Movieguide Reviews

a. Moulin Rouge! ([05:00–15:00])

• Rating: -2 (Extreme caution; older teens/adults). Quality: 3/4 stars.
• Warning codes explained: "ROW" (Romantic), "SS" (Sexual sin), "N" (Naturalistic nudity), "A" (Alcohol), "M" (Miscellaneous immorality).
• Mrs. P paraphrasing Movieguide content warning:
  • "No actual depicted sex…but much eroticism…a sexy green fairy flies around…sexually driven score with…many sexually aggressive dances." (B, 10:24)
• Key Moment: The hosts laugh over the flagging of “light romance” as a warning, and the way “miscellaneous immorality” becomes an ongoing joke for them.
  • "Miscellaneous immorality. Because it was the funniest concept." (B, 12:55)
• Memorable Quote:
  • "Although very beautifully shot, the movie depicts decadence and promotes erotic frenzy in the name of love." (B, 13:59)

b. Fiddler on the Roof ([16:27–17:41])

• Finding: No review exists.
  • "There's no review of Fiddler on the Roof...a movie about Jews living in Russia at the turn of the century..." (A, 16:47)
• Running Gag: The lack of review for this classic is noted as a likely intentional omission ("not a single one").

c. The Sound of Music ([17:42–23:08])

• Rating: +3 (Family-friendly), 4/4 stars.
• Abbreviations: "CCC" (Strong Christian elements), "BBB" (Strong Biblical worldview), "D" (a little smoking), "MM" (Light miscellaneous immorality).
• Key Review Line:
  • "Strong Christian worldview with main characters seeking God’s will for her life...few instances of smoking, dishonesty, and rebellion." (B, 21:11)
• Host Reactions:
  • Pearlmania admits he’s never actually seen it, only its references.

d. Wicked ([23:33–30:43])

• Rating: -2 (Extreme caution), Quality: 3/4 stars.
• Warnings: “Politically correct and feminist content…animal rights activism,” plus a note on “pagan worldview.”
• Memorable Line:
  • "...politically correct and feminist content is negative, and they're also having the gall to promote animal rights activism;...so they're inherently saying that animal rights activism is not moral." (B, 25:54)
• **Hosts admit neither has seen it; much of their knowledge comes from “press tour and TikToks.”

e. A Star Is Born (2018, Lady Gaga version) ([33:43–47:04])

• Rating: -3 (Excessive sex, violence, and immorality!!), 4/4 stars for entertainment.
• Content Warnings:
  • “Heavy language, moderate violence, moderate sexual, heavy nudity.”
  • "A man urinating on himself while drunk." (B, 40:01)
  • “Strongly romantic worldview...personal expression in art and music as the highest good a person can do.” (Negative to reviewer.)
• Memorable Quote:
  • "They gave it four stars. Because they love it. They're just like, not for the family." (A, 37:53)
• Key Host Rant:
  • Mrs. P (re: lack of redemptive ending):
    • "I think that's the part they don't like...that she doesn't just grieve and give up on her dreams because a marriage failed." (B, 48:11)

f. The Greatest Showman ([52:54–56:28])

• Rating: -2 (Extreme caution), 4/4 stars.
• Review Title: “Promoting human dignity, family, tolerance and capitalism.” (B, 54:33)
• Key Review Summary:
  • "Light, mixed pagan worldview...romantic, slightly politically correct elements...pro homosexual connotations, but…mixed with a strong moral and light redemptive elements, including family man cherishes his wife and two daughters." (B, 55:44)
• Mrs. P on historical accuracy:
  • "As soon as his wife died, he skipped the funeral and married a 20 year old." (B, 59:06)
• Host Reaction:
  • "I want to die. Because they love the lies." (A, 59:03)

g. Sweeney Todd ([62:54–68:41])

• Rating: -4 (“To be avoided by everyone”), intentional blasphemy, evil, gross immorality.
• Summary:
  • "Strong pagan worldview where revenge is glorified, murder is justified, and cannibalism is made to be funny." (B, 66:43)
• Hosts note: The main issues flagged are, hilariously, just the actual (over-the-top) plot of the show.

h. Mamma Mia! ([69:14–75:57])

• Rating: -3 (Excessive sex, violence, immorality), 2/4 stars (not even fun, according to reviewers).
• Key Review Points:
  • "Very strong hippie, romantic worldview...strong feminist view...solid homosexual references, including men kiss and want to get married." (B, 72:08)
• Hosts’ Reaction:
  • "She was outside with a lot of handsome men." (B, 70:11)
• Standout Complaint from Review:
  • "During one song, a woman places a mock phallus between her legs…A woman slides down banister, hurting herself. Young African American man tries to have relationship with older woman who mocks going down on him.” (B, 75:11)

i. Chicago ([83:00–88:50])

• Rating: -2, 3/4 stars.
• Review Line:
  • “1920s, sleazy dancing, jail chicks sold." (B, 85:41)
• **Hosts connect the musical’s obsession with crime (unpunished!) to contemporary America.

j. Cats (2019) ([89:44–94:24])

• Rating: +1 (pg-ish, for kids), 4/4 stars (reviewers loved it!)
• Movieguide Summary:
  • "A redemptive musical tale with multiple tales. Strong Christian moral worldview, where cats compete for the one special cat who will go to heaven and be reborn... forgiveness and salvation are granted." (B, 92:01)
• Both hosts react in disbelief:
  • “They thought Cats the movie musical was a four-star tour de force.” (A, 91:53)
• Mrs. P’s Take: ‘Cats’ on Broadway was always a mean prank people played on each other—now it’s being praised as a children’s classic.

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3. Lightning Round: Quick Takes ([77:53–94:58])

• Grease: -2, 3/4 stars. Review title: “Compromise is the word.” Reviewers warn about "compromise," hosts note this is a PG-13 mainstay.
• Les Misérables: -1, 4/4 stars. “Fabulous Redemption.” Hosts highlight the always-present Christian redemptive arc.
• Rocky Horror Picture Show, Cabaret, Little Shop of Horrors: No review exists. Reason for absence is a running joke (too queer/campy).
• Overall Trend: Movieguide writes off any musical with non-traditional gender/sexuality or politics (pagan, feminist, environmentalist, etc.), but will still sometimes give high entertainment scores or extra points if there's a "redemptive" Christian/Biblical element.
• Hosts repeatedly note: The reviews are more a reflection of the reviewers’ fear and confusion about joy, difference, and fun, than anything wrong with the movies.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• “They admit it’s a good movie. Full of sin.” (A, 07:18, on Moulin Rouge!)
• “Miscellaneous immorality. Because it was the funniest concept.” (B, 12:55)
• “They want to act like he’s this moral, upstanding man. Why don’t you tell them what his grandkids did?” (A, 56:37)
• “1920s, sleazy dancing, jail chicks—sold!” (B, 85:41)
• "The movie stresses a biblical belief in human dignity of all people..." (B, 59:15, mocking Movieguide on The Greatest Showman)
• "Strongly romantic worldview...places personal expression in art and music as the highest good a person can do. So that's negative." (B, 42:09)
• “A redemptive musical tale with multiple tales.” (B, 90:51, Movieguide on Cats)
• “I think that’s the part they don’t like – that she keeps going on with her life, that she doesn’t just grieve and give up on her dreams because a marriage failed.” (B, 48:42, on A Star Is Born)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• [01:00–05:00]: Setup and intro to the Movieguide method
• [05:00–15:00]: Moulin Rouge! deep dive and content rating jokes
• [16:27–17:41]: Fiddler on the Roof's absence
• [17:42–23:08]: The Sound of Music's glowing review
• [23:33–30:43]: Wicked and the conservative panic about feminism and animal rights
• [33:43–47:04]: A Star Is Born and the obsession with redemptive endings
• [52:54–56:28]: The Greatest Showman: apologia for human dignity and capitalism
• [62:54–68:41]: Sweeney Todd is “to be avoided by all”—cannibalism, murder, blasphemy!
• [69:14–75:57]: Mamma Mia! tripped up by romance, feminism, and banister sliding
• [83:00–88:50]: Chicago and a country with “no consequences for crime”
• [89:44–94:24]: Cats reviewed as a Christian masterpiece(!)
• [77:53–Around 94:00]: Lightning Round: Grease, Les Mis, Little Shop, Rocky Horror, and more

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Tone and Format

• Conversational, irreverent, and fast-paced, packed with in-jokes, pop culture tangents, and affectionate ribbing (of both each other and Movieguide reviewers).
• Recurring gags: “Miscellaneous immorality,” “older teens and adults,” mocking omissions (Fiddler, Cabaret, Rocky Horror), and the increasingly arbitrary scoring system of Movieguide.
• Pop culture-rich: Many asides about actors, memes (“old face”), and current events.
• Occasional soapbox moments: Both hosts articulate thoughtful critiques of conservative moral panic and the way “redemptive” endings are forced onto art.

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Conclusion

The hosts wrap up by reflecting on how much (and how little) these right-wing culture critics actually understand about musicals, entertainment, and joy. Their absurdly detailed, sometimes glowing, sometimes damning reviews reveal more about their own worldview (and its discomfort with fun, difference, or ambiguity) than about the movies themselves.

Final Note:
If you want to experience the best "miscellaneous immorality" and joy musicals have to offer, listen to Too Many Tabs—not Movieguide.org.

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For more: Ad-free episodes, bonus content, and to support the show, visit pearlmania500.net.

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

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[A]

Shh. Learn more at. Join Mochi.com Mochi members have access to licensed physicians and nutritionists. Results may vary. MAGA conservatives are famously afraid of cities. Big cities, streets, stoplights, anything where there's large collections of people. That means that MAGA is never able to go see a Broadway play, right, Mrs. P?

[B]

Never.

[A]

No, they're terrified of it. They might have to walk past Times Square Elmo.

[B]

Oh, no.

[A]

Oh, the humanity. That's why this week we're gonna take a look at what MAGA Christians think of the movie versions of some of our favorite Broadway plays. That's right. We're gonna go to the movie Guide and find out what MAGA Christians think about some of our favorite and gayest musicals. Too many. Remember to smile. Welcome to Too Many Tabs, a podcast where a husband and wife duo sit next to each other at a table and, you know, else we do sometimes. Sometimes we sit next to each other on Broadway watching a musical in the wonderful, beautiful New York City. Isn't that right, Mrs. P?

[B]

We get a nice dinner, go see a show. It's a great time.

[A]

It is a great time. You know who doesn't do that, Mrs. P?

[B]

Who?

[A]

Maga Christians.

[B]

Oh.

[A]

Christian nationalists are often terrified of New York City.

[B]

Oh, yeah, they're very scared of cities.

[A]

They're very scared. Every single one of them thinks that they're gonna be murdered. Like the Wayne family. They think they're gonna go see a musical and then be murdered by Times Square Elmo. And Times Square Elmo isn't scary. He's not Philly Elmo. No, he's Times Square elmo. Give him $5. Take the picture. Yeah, but because of this, Maga Christians don't get to go to Broadway musicals that often.

[B]

They stay home.

[A]

They stay home.

[B]

They watch them on streaming or on VHS.

[A]

Yes, 100%. They watch them the way you and I watch movies together, which is on separate chairs.

[B]

And couches while staring at a phone

[A]

across the room from each other. Not making eye contact.

[B]

Don't talk to me.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

While I have a little sweet drink.

[A]

And I think this is terrible because as we know, many, many, many, many, many maga Christians are deeply in the closet and they should be allowed to go and have fun. Go, go. See all these beautiful bright colors.

[B]

Disagree. I don't think they should be allowed.

[A]

Well, I think that they.

[B]

I think that you're not allowed to have fun when you're a mega Christian.

[A]

I think that if they did, they would open them up a little bit.

[B]

No. Then they just get to enjoy the fruits of our labors.

[A]

But the thing is, is so then

[B]

they pay the tickets and then we get to use their money. See, it's a. It's a real gray area.

[A]

It is a gray area. But the thing is, is you and I were thinking about it more and more because we've been in a little bit of a musical phase.

[B]

Okay. So here I did an episode of PC Barnum and then you got really up about the movie.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

The Greatest Showman.

[A]

Yes. Because it was one of the worst movie musicals I've ever seen in my entire life.

[B]

Started talking about movie musicals and I said, you know, it'll be funny is if we looked up the movie musicals on the movieguide.org yes.

[A]

And now you need to explain to the people who didn't watch, who hasn't been watching this. This show or listening to the show for a very long time. Thirty episodes ago. Thirty episodes ago we did with Mr. Third a review of movieguide.org's reaction to some of our favorite movies.

[B]

Yes. So movieguide.org let me p. From the overview. Movieguide.org is a Christian based family friendly media review website founded by Dr. Ted Baer. It has movie and TV reviews that evaluate content for violence, sex and language through a Christian biblical lens to help families make informed movie night choices.

[A]

That's incredible. What a great way of saying of, you know, you don't need to go ask, is the movie good? You, you need to ask, is the movie godly?

[B]

That's right.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

And so I thought it'd be fun if we got a little list together of some musicals. Our favorite musical.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

And put them in the movie guide.org and see what the reviews are like.

[A]

Yeah. So you and I both sat down, we wrote down the musicals we like. Because there are some musicals I do like.

[B]

Yes, yes.

[A]

And we wrote them down and then let's go see. And we made sure that These are all musicals that have also had movie versions of them.

[B]

Yes. It has to be a movie version of. Of a music.

[A]

Of a Broadway musical or.

[B]

Or vice versa. Because sometimes they're just movie musicals that then got turned into Broadway shows.

[A]

Do you have an example?

[B]

Moulin Rouge.

[A]

Oh, you love Moulin.

[B]

I want to start with Moulin Rouge.

[A]

Oh, this is so funny. So recently. Yeah. Ewan McGregor and Nicole Kidman were at the Oscars.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

And they had a moment when they met up on stage and they. They started singing back and forth.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And then you came down crying.

[B]

That's. I. Yeah.

[A]

You saw it. You saw it on your phone. We didn't watch the actual Oscars. You saw clips of it.

[B]

I just saw it on my phone. I was like, oh, my God.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

The teenager in my heart was obsessed.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Because all you need is love.

[A]

The John Lennon song.

[B]

It's a new and McGregor song.

[A]

No. You hate John Lennon, though. I just want to point that out.

[B]

Ewan McGregor songs.

[A]

Mrs. P hates John Lennon. She doesn't like Ringo. She has mixed feelings towards George.

[B]

None.

[A]

But you love Paul McCartney.

[B]

He makes a great pop song. What are you going to do?

[A]

But if you go and you take a John Lennon song and you put it in a musical.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

And you don't let. What was her name from Wonder Woman. Oh, you don't do Imagine. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

As long as it's not imagined during COVID Yeah. Mrs. P will probably gobble it up.

[B]

No, you need to have a lot more going.

[A]

Gal Gadot.

[B]

That's who it is. No, you need this to be a Baz Luhrmann production. There's got to be lights, spectacle, colors. It's got to be a whole thing.

[A]

So, Mrs. P, what did the movieguide.org what is their Christian worldview? Through a Christian worldview lens, how did they react to this modern musical about an 1880s courtesan dying of tuberculosis while falling in love with an absinthe riddled poet bohemian who is trying to save her from a duke in Paris while singing hit pop songs from the 70s, 80s and 90s?

[B]

I'm so excited to tell you. Number one. Negative two.

[A]

Negative two.

[B]

There is a family content warning of negative two. Extreme caution for older teenagers and adults.

[A]

Extra. Older teens and adults can't see this movie.

[B]

Negative 2.

[A]

That's the only time you've ever watched this movie has been as older teens.

[B]

I think I watched it as a younger teen. I don't remember what year it came out.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

But as a teen, I made this Movie, my whole personality.

[A]

Okay. And the one thing we have to say about Movie guide is they have a. They have a plus four, minus four scale.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Of how family friendly acceptable this is.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But they also have a quality rating. What's the quality rating?

[B]

Guess what? Three out of four.

[A]

Three out of four out of four.

[B]

They. They admit it's a good movie.

[A]

So they watched it and they're like, good movie. Full of sin.

[B]

Yeah, they're like, good movie. Don't let older teenagers or adults watch it. So this doesn't mean so for children. I don't think children should be watching this movie.

[A]

Oh, no, wait, I'm looking over your shoulder. What they're saying here, Extreme caution. This movie is for older teens and adults. This is like a PG13 rating.

[B]

I thought they were saying it was for the babies.

[A]

No, no.

[B]

And I said, that's weird.

[A]

No.

[B]

You wouldn't feel like a Christian worldview at all.

[A]

No. You wouldn't show this to the baby?

[B]

No.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

But also there, I mean, I pull up their quick review, right? It's under their content and it has all these like acronyms. It says row, ROW, ROW comma, B comma, V comma, SS comma, N comma, A comma, M comma. And these are. What's the word for them?

[A]

Little abbreviations.

[B]

Abbreviations for general content warnings. And so I have sent you the document.

[A]

Yes, I have it right here.

[B]

Your job is to tell me what they mean. Okay, so I do not remember from last time.

[A]

No, I know. And we went through this last time. And so if it, if it's a certain letter or a two letter thing and then they repeat it a bunch of times, that is the scale. It's like exponentially worse. Yeah. So ROW means romantic.

[B]

Okay, so it's got romance.

[A]

Yeah. ROW is light romance. Row, row, ROW is very strong romantic. Idealistic worldview or romantic elements.

[B]

Okay, all right.

[A]

So they're like, hey. And it's weird that they're like, they're flagging that as content. They're like, just so you know, this content, it has a lot of romance and ideal. But. But idealism. Yeah, because they view idealism as bad. Even though you're trying to fulfill a Christian ideal, their idea of idealism.

[B]

So they're saying it was bad that she wanted to fall in love with the person she was going to marry, aka Ewan McGregor, instead of just marrying the Duke that wanted to buy her.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

That was idealistic of her.

[A]

Well, she. Well, I mean, listen, a woman being bought by a Duke Is biblical like that is. I don't know. If you read a Bible, man. You're allowed.

[B]

This makes sense because one of the lines in here says, strong romantic worldview, promoting erotic frenzy in the name of love.

[A]

All you need is love.

[B]

All you need is love.

[A]

Yeah. All you need is love. Okay. What were some of the other letters? B.

[B]

Just the letter.

[A]

Just a letter B. Yeah. Okay. The letter B means mild or light, biblical or moral worldview, principles or perspective or character.

[B]

So that's good.

[A]

Yeah. So they're just like, hey, there is. There's a little bit of biblical in here.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I think that's like a scene where somebody was like, hey, Nicole Kidman. No, it's bad that you are. That you're a courtesan. It's bad that you're a woman in Paris.

[B]

The Duke that's saying that, he's like, I'm gonna buy you and I'll take you out of here.

[A]

Got it? Give me another letter.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

SS don't love that. Don't love. Just them saying SS that means something wildly different in German. But according to these Christian nationalists, these Nazis, if you will, the SS means depicted adultery, promiscuity, sexual perversion or sexual immorality. That's going to be. I think there's. So. I think there's. There might be a scene with men's kissings.

[B]

Let me take. Let me re. One of these lines too.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

How they're describing this. No actual depicted sex or sexual immorality, but much eroticism, such as erotic sexual sex games played at. At played that insinuate orgasms. A sexy green fairy flies around. Metaphorically sexual conversation between man and woman. Man and woman lay on top of each other. Woman seductively grasps man body. Two men on one woman. Sexually driven score with fast edgy edits stirring up a sexual frenzy and many sexually aggressive dances.

[A]

That green fairy. That sexy green fairy has a name?

[B]

Yeah. Kylie Minogue.

[A]

Yeah, it's Kylie Minogue. A sexy green fairy appear, you not

[B]

just say kylie Minogue.

[A]

It's Kylie McNug. I don't understand how you don't nail that one immediately. Christian website, Movie regard, they don't even

[B]

list her as being starred on it. When I'm seeing the little.

[A]

To be fair, she's. She pops up for like a second, but it's Kylie. I know, I understand that, but listing her as a star in the movie.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I like how you really went. Padam. Yeah. You immediately went to Padam. That's incredible. What other letters do we have on there?

[B]

Let's just keep.

[A]

Just N. Just N. Let's see. That is naturalistic nudity. Not in a sexual context.

[B]

Okay, so somebody's just like taking a shower.

[A]

No, I think somewhere in there there probably is a painting, right? Because it's Paris in the 1880s.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

You know, so I'm sure somewhere in there there is like just a painting of something. I think there was an A in there. Right.

[B]

Dancing women lift their Dr. Exposing undergarments and showing partial nudity.

[A]

That is the can can. They're literally just describing. Describing the can can.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay, what other letters do we have? A is light brief or some alcohol use.

[B]

That's what the green fairy is.

[A]

It's absent.

[B]

Yeah. You're not allowed to have.

[A]

I'm not allowed to have absinthe, Daddy.

[B]

You're allowed to have into cloud.

[A]

Daddy. Daddy used to touch the absinthe and the absence used to touch back. So we don't do that no more. I literally. I met you, I was like, well, I'm gonna play around with some absinthe. And then I met you.

[B]

I said not anymore.

[A]

But yeah, you said not anymore. And then you're like 15 years from now. Maybe you'll get a sponsorship from a different company. So what's the last letter there? You have M. So we're just spelling nam at the end. M is light. Light. Miscellaneous immorality.

[B]

Oh, that's right. Because the movieguide.org episode we originally did.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Which was titled you won't believe how MAGA Christians rate our favorite movies. Episode 136 is when I decided I needed to have merch that said miscellaneous immorality. Because it was the funniest concept.

[A]

It was the just so crazy obsessed

[B]

with the idea of miscellaneous immorality.

[A]

And these are some of the things they list. Gambling, revenge, theft, blackmail, et cetera, by the way. All things that the President of the United States that they support for Loves.

[B]

Loves.

[A]

It was like, what the are you talking about? But yeah, this is light miscellaneous immorality. Just like I feel like.

[B]

Cuz John, I like it when it gets big. In terms of miscellaneous immorality.

[A]

Very strong. Extreme.

[B]

Yeah. What's that? Is that. Mmm.

[A]

Yeah. Mmm.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. Good. Yeah, I'm an. Mmm. Fighter.

[A]

You're. You're a fighter?

[B]

Yeah. Well, instead of an MMA fighter.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Like Mark Wayne Mullen, our new secretary.

[B]

Let me just close the Moulin Rouge. The last line from this content warning.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Although very beautifully shot, the movie depicts decadence and promotes erotic frenzy in the name of love.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So you admit it's an entertaining movie?

[A]

Oh, they can't.

[B]

It's beautiful.

[A]

This is the one thing I'll give. Movie guide.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

They, they admit when a movie's good. Yeah. At the end of the day, these are people who could never get jobs as real movie critics. Yeah. So they needed the Christian gimmick and I don't think any of them are being paid. Is that Minnie Driver?

[B]

Yeah. Oh, that. This keeps happening every time I open this website, the movie guide website. Minnie Driver's face keeps popping up because she did some show about women in the Bible. And I think she plays Mary, I think. And it's called the Faithful Women of the Bible. So Fox, an epic three week television event. It's three weeks.

[A]

Can I tell you, she doesn't even look biblical. She just looks like Minnie Driver. Just so it's on.

[B]

It's.

[A]

It's on the column of your screen. Yeah. It's not on mine because I use ad block. But you know what isn't ad blocked? This sponsor, which we'll hear from right after this. If you need to relax, grab Into Cloud. Into Cloud is your fully legal online dispensary. Check out their flower gummies, vapes, pre rolls and edibles. Skip the hangovers and unwind with Into Cloud's new zero sugar, zero calorie THC sodas. And you know what? I've been every now and then been climbing into Cloud.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

Because the world is a darker place every single day and I like to be above those dark clouds.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Just in the nice fluffy ones up there. And Into Cloud has also helped me stop doom scrolling a little bit pretty recently. But trying out the Indicloud Bliss gummies. And they've, they've been giving me some pretty great sleep. This is the elderberry flavor. I've been trying some other ones out there as well. All Into Cloud products are federally legal THC. Everything sold is DEA certified and lab tested. If you're 21 or older, get 35% off this entire month at indecloud co. That's indicloud code tabs for 35% off all month long. Ship discreetly to your door. After you order, fill out the survey and tell them too many tabs sent you. Thanks so much to that sponsor. Or if you're one of the people who Support [e-mail] Join our Patreon. Get ad free content and extra bonus content. Mrs. P. Yes. Now you did yours.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's time for me to do My next one.

[B]

The next one to do is from your favorite movie musical.

[A]

Yeah, my favorite movie musical. And it's also one I've seen live a few times. Yeah, Fiddler on the Roof. Tell me, what does the Christian movie guy Dog think about Fiddler on the Roof?

[B]

No review.

[A]

What?

[B]

No review.

[A]

There's no review of Fiddler on the Roof?

[B]

Nope.

[A]

We can't find out about a Christian biblical worldview about Fiddler on a Roof, A movie about Jews living in Russia at the turn of the century who have to be chased out of their village through pogroms, who then move slowly to America?

[B]

Nope.

[A]

They don't Give us a -4 through +4 review or even a 1 to 4 star review about Fiddler on the Roof.

[B]

No. So I just went to my next one.

[A]

Wait, they don't cover the song's tradition?

[B]

No.

[A]

Tradition. Tradition. They didn't cover that.

[B]

No.

[A]

Sunrise, sunset?

[B]

No.

[A]

Matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match.

[B]

No.

[A]

Find me a fine. No Catch, me a catch.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

They don't cover any of that.

[B]

No.

[A]

Not a single one.

[B]

Put in the search engine.

[A]

Yep.

[B]

I tried different spellings.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Try looking everywhere for it does not exist. No review.

[A]

There is no Christian biblical world review. Yeah. About Fiddler on the Roof.

[B]

Nope.

[A]

What did you pick?

[B]

The Sound of Music.

[A]

Oh, my God. Okay, I picked a movie about Jews facing pogroms in Eastern Europe. Yeah. And you're going with the Nazi nun movie.

[B]

Okay, I'm not going with it. Yeah, it was on my list. And it's not even one of my favorite musicals. It's one that I watched so much growing. Growing up. My grandparents love the Sound of Music, so it's like every Sunday. We had to watch it for some reason. And so I was just like, oh, famous movie, musical, Sound of Music. Not one of my faves.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

But I just know, like, it lives so big in my mind of something from my childhood, so I wanted to see what they thought of it.

[A]

Okay, what, what do the. The nationalist Christians or Nazis, if you will, what do they think of the Sound of Music?

[B]

Plus three with only some minor questionable elements.

[A]

Huh.

[B]

Also four stars.

[A]

Four stars out of four. It is, like, considered like one of the musicals. Yes. It's like when you think of musicals, the Hills are Alive. That's the only one. Oh, wait, that one.

[B]

In I am 16 going on 17. Okay, that's creepy.

[A]

I don't like that one.

[B]

Guess who she's singing to. It's a Nazi soldier.

[A]

Now we see why they gave it a plus three for family so it

[B]

only has four of the little abbreviations.

[A]

Oh, hit me with an abbreviation.

[B]

Okay. Ccc.

[A]

CCC is very strong Christian worldviews or elements. Gospel, witness and redemptive elements.

[B]

So that's good thing for them they

[A]

didn't review Fiddler on the Roof.

[B]

Okay. Bbb. The Better Business Bureau.

[A]

Okay. Very strong biblical or moral worldview principles, Perspective or character.

[B]

The Naz movie D. Well, it is an anti Nazi movie.

[A]

It is an anti Nazi.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. They're not pro the Nazis.

[A]

I know. I know that. But everything I've like. Okay, can I be. Can I be honest with you?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Never seen it.

[B]

You've never seen the Sound of Music?

[A]

I've never seen the Sound of Music.

[B]

You okay? The Sound of Music has been out since 1965.

[A]

Yeah, I know. I understand that. I understand. It's just one of those ones where I know the references of it.

[B]

It.

[A]

Julian. Farewell A Feeders and Goodbye Julie Andrews. I know. I watched Victor Victoria instead. I think I've seen Victor Victoria like three times.

[B]

What's D mean?

[A]

D is smoking and heavy. Illegal drug use and. Or illegal drug sales. I think it's because then the dad smoke in this movie.

[B]

Only one D. Oh, just one D.

[A]

It's just light brief for some smoking.

[B]

Yeah. There's just like one guy.

[A]

I read Triple D. Yeah.

[B]

Not triple D. Yes.

[A]

One guy smokes a cigarette because the movie was made in 1965.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Mr. M M. We had before, didn't we? Light miscellaneous immorality.

[B]

Just light immorality. I wonder who the characters are that have a light. Not an intense. Yeah, A light amount of immorality.

[A]

Yeah. I could keep saying though, like, this is like a Nazi move.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I mean, there's not.

[B]

In the movie, there is a bad guy. There's a bad guy villain in this

[A]

movie and he's a Nazi.

[B]

Yeah. It is the Nazi party as a whole.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And the Nazis are the bad guy. And they're only getting the lightest.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Miscellaneous and real.

[A]

I want to be clear to the comments in here. I know that this movie is about defeating Nazi. Is.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

It's just the famous gift of the dad ripping the swastika banner.

[B]

Yeah, exactly.

[A]

Yeah. Like I've seen. I've seen that one so many times. And that gift got used a lot from 2019 through 2023.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then one day we just stop using it and now here we are.

[B]

So there's only one sentence in the content review.

[A]

Oh, okay. Go ahead.

[B]

It says, strong Christian worldview. With main characters seeking God's will for her life. Because, again, she's a.

[A]

She's a nun.

[B]

No bad language, sex, nudity, or violence. A few instances of smoking, dishonesty, and rebellion.

[A]

Oh, okay. Those are the things that are bad. Not the fucking Nazi.

[B]

Not the bad guys.

[A]

Nope.

[B]

It's the. It's the teenage rebellion that is insinuated for the girl wanting to date a Nazi. A Nazi, Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But it's not that. What? He is.

[A]

So long, farewell a fetus, and goodbye. I really know that because of a Family Guy reference.

[B]

Oh.

[A]

That's the thing is, like, with a lot of old movies, I didn't. There's, like, certain ones I didn't see because they were so heavily referenced in other things. You know what I mean? Like, there's, like, a thing like. I've never actually read Moby Dick, but I know how the book goes because it's been referenced so much in the Simpsons and Star Trek and so many other different things.

[B]

The movie features Julie Andrews in a signature role. She was brilliant as Maria, a troublesome Austrian postulate sent by the Abbey to serve as governess for the seven children of Captain Von Trapp, a wealthy retired Austrian niece naval officer. They love her. 10 out of 10. 4 star. 4 stars out of 4.

[A]

I feel like also this is one of those ones where they're like, oh, I saw it as a kid and I turned out fine. You know what I mean? There's certain things with older movies like that where it's like, yeah, I saw it as a kid. It's fine. I've seen it. Yeah. I can see if you never knew what this was and now you're seeing it. But I saw. When I was 8, I loved it. Watched all the time. My mom watching my grandma. Movie's fine.

[B]

Movie's fine.

[A]

Yeah. But then, I mean, there's times like that where you and I will sit down to watch a movie with Pearl Baby. Because he's a toddler now, he's starting to, like, understand the idea of plot. He's understanding seeing things and what happened to the characters, and he's, like, empathizing with them, and we're like, oh, I guess this is. This is intense. As Woody and Buzz and Bullseye and Jesse reach out and hold each other's hands as they get pushed towards the fire.

[B]

Yeah. Where they're going to be incinerated.

[A]

Yeah. They're about to be incinerated in Toy Story 3.

[B]

And we're like, yeah, know what? This is a really intense scene.

[A]

A really intense.

[B]

Accepting death and holding each other in that moment.

[A]

Yeah. There's a moment when they look at each other like, well, at least we're together at the end. Yeah. Jesus.

[B]

Yeah. And you're like, this is. What was this? Pg?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

No. So like, let's think about what was next on your list. Do you remember the next one you sent me?

[A]

Yes. So I sent you the movie Wicked.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Okay. Yes. And now here's the thing. I do have to be completely honest about this.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I've never actually seen, seen Wicked. I've never seen the musical, the Broadway. I haven't watched the two part movie. Yeah. I have seen the press tour. I've seen the press tour. Yeah. And I've seen a lot of tick tocks.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

I've heard the lady at the end of the first movie.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I've heard the, the cuts and all those different things. And I know Bowen Yang's in it.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

And I know that this destroyed a marriage.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

SpongeBob's marriage was destroyed by this movie.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So there's things I know about it, but I put this one on as a Fun1 because one, we have walked past Wicked on Broadway when we went to go see a violently different movie. And two, I just want to know what they have to think about.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I need to know what the Christian maga worldview on Wicked is.

[B]

Well, negative two.

[A]

Negative two.

[B]

Extreme caution for older teenagers and adults. Again. Okay, we got a negative 2, but entertainment quality, 3 out of 4. So still just entertaining.

[A]

They're like, okay, they're again older. I wonder what older teen means for them.

[B]

Yeah, I. Because again, it's like a teen. When does teenagers end? 18. Right.

[A]

Well, no, teenagers, teenagers technically speaking ends at 19.

[B]

Oh, right.

[A]

19 is the end of teen. But people really think of teen as between 13 and 18 because at 18 you're legal or whatever. Yeah.

[B]

So maybe 17, 18, 19. That's the older teenager.

[A]

Maybe that's the only that they mean.

[B]

Yeah, that's. I think that's who they're saying because

[A]

they, but, but websites and people like this, they do believe in teen marriage. So they can't see Wicked, but they can have a kid.

[B]

Yeah. You know what's really crazy about the teen marriage thing is in the states that allowed child and teen marriages.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You can get married before you're 18, but you can't get divorced before you're 18.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

So if you get married at 12 to like a psycho 40 year old man.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

In your church, you can't Legally divorce him until you turn 18. So you're trapped there. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

That's a very biblical worldview. Yeah, that's a very biblical worldview.

[B]

Let's go over the content of Wicked.

[A]

Okay. The content. Okay, let me pull up the content guide again. Tell me.

[B]

Let me read it. Let me read you some worldview elements.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Mixed pagan worldview with negative and positive elements, including strong romantic, politically correct, and feminist content that also promotes animal rights activism, but mixed with strong moral elements, extolling friendship, promoting a fight against tyranny and women. And a woman has magical powers, but she can't control them. And the first spell she finally cast has negative and painful consequences. Okay, So I thought that was extra crazy because they're like, the politically correct and feminist content is negative, and they're also having the gall to promote animal rights activism, but they also mix it with strong moral elements. So they're inherently saying that animal rights activism is not moral, and neither is feminist and politically correct. Correct thoughts are amoral.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

That's crazy.

[A]

Well, you've never been to Oklahoma.

[B]

No.

[A]

So, like, this is very much the idea of the animal rights activist thing is very much along the lines of people fighting back in their mind and who they're the target audience of something like the movieguide.org is they're pushing for Oklahoma because they don't want anyone to push back into factory farming.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And the idea of, like, you know, hogs going through a conveyor belt or, like, how we do cattle farming or any of these different types of. Types of things. And by the way, I think, again, haven't seen the movie. Gonna guess since it's based on the wizard of Oz. It's not the wizard of Oz. It's a different novel that then got turned into this musical fanfic. It's a fanfic, but based on that, I'm gonna guess the animal rights thing. Probably the cowardly Lion.

[B]

Oh, I don't know.

[A]

Probably the Cowardly Lion.

[B]

I also have not seen Wicked.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

I know.

[A]

Read me some of the initials here.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Papa. Papa is strong pagan worldview. Yeah, that just means witchcraft.

[B]

Ro.

[A]

Ro. Row. Row. That's romance.

[B]

Okay. Pcpc.

[A]

Pcpc. Politically correct.

[B]

Oh, that's a negative.

[A]

Yeah, they want to just. They just want to check that one up. And that's a leftover from Rush Limbaugh Days.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

We got to fight back against the PC police, folks.

[B]

I wish I could piss on his grave.

[A]

You can.

[B]

I know, but I can't get there right now. I'M very busy.

[A]

Okay. I know. That's Fifi. I'm sorry. I kind of. Just sit in this for a minute. Because someday you'll get there, babe. Yeah, someday you'll get there. Fifi. Fifi. Sounds like something that would be fun. Is that just fe F?

[B]

E?

[A]

F E. Okay. That means feminist worldview or elements.

[B]

Oh, no.

[A]

Yeah. E. E. Environmentalism or environmentalist worldview. Which is crazy because the Christian biblical worldview, okay. Is that man has dominion over the earth.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And in that dominion, we're supposed to be taking care of the earth.

[B]

We're supposed to take care of the

[A]

environment, the animals, all these different things.

[B]

Advocate for the earth and her animals.

[A]

Yeah. But somewhere in there, the idea, these ideals got perverted by capitalist structures that then change that into how dare you tell me what I can do with my land.

[B]

Let me tell you the next sentence in this content review.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

There's a positive reference to heaven and a supporting character is effeminate. Is an effeminate male with same sex attractions.

[A]

So they just said Bowen Yang's in this movie.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That's what that is. Right? Am I wrong? Am I crazy?

[B]

No, that's.

[A]

They're like, hey, heads up. Content warning. Bowen Yang. That's fucking crazy. Also, they watch that whole movie with a little heaven counter. Yeah, well. Oh, my God, I don't want to die and go to heaven.

[B]

Click.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

The prince is so handsome and charismatic that he makes both males and females swoon in one musical number. Oh, that's too handsome. That's not biblical. You can't.

[A]

Not biblical. That's not biblical. I'm assuming they're not talking about spongebob in that.

[B]

I. They couldn't possibly.

[A]

I don't think. I don't think spongebob.

[B]

I don't know who the character is.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Because again, neither of us have seen this film musical.

[A]

No.

[B]

We have no place to review it. MovieGuy.org has seen this film.

[A]

This. This all came out as our kid was being born.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And so we just didn't have the time or mental capacity. And then when it did pop up on streaming, I sat down with you one night. I was like, do you want to put on Wicked?

[B]

And you look so many hours.

[A]

It's two and a half hours for the first part. One.

[B]

No, I can't do it.

[A]

And I'm like, we couldn't.

[B]

And then the whole press was just so much press.

[A]

I like when they held the finger

[B]

and they were just. They were. It was just so much. And also they. They were so concerning. They were so thin.

[A]

They're so thin.

[B]

And I got so nervous every time I saw them.

[A]

I know.

[B]

And I was like, I don't want to watch a movie where the whole time I'm concerned.

[A]

Yeah, I still. And also, I want to. I do want to see it. I do want to see it. It's just a matter of trying to figure out when the time.

[B]

I want to go to Broadway and see it.

[A]

You want to go to Broadway and see Wicked?

[B]

Yeah, let's just drive up to New York and see.

[A]

I also just want to see. I kind of want to see the movie, too. I don't want to just drive up to New York.

[B]

What if we drove to New York, get a hotel and watch it in the hotel?

[A]

That would be crazy.

[B]

What if we order room service, Watch it in the hotel.

[A]

Because so far we've also stayed at a hotel where we can see the Wicked sign from the window.

[B]

Yeah. So what if we stayed at that hotel, watched Wicked on the TV while ordering room service, but we saw the Wicked sign outside. That counts.

[A]

That does count.

[B]

That counts.

[A]

That does count.

[B]

Think of the coziness we'd be in our little PJs. We'd have our little snacks.

[A]

That would be comfort cozy.

[B]

Yeah, I think we should do that.

[A]

I think we should.

[B]

That would be the craziest thing to do.

[A]

You know what else would be crazy?

[B]

Would it be cheaper than buying tickets?

[A]

I don't know. Yes, I think it might be. Yeah. I don't know. Because I would be using my. I would be using a family member's peacock login on my laptop.

[B]

Of course.

[A]

Because there's no way I'm paying for that.

[B]

No, no, no.

[A]

But you know what? You should pay for this sponsor. I think one of the strangest things about modern life is that most of us got to grow up as private citizens. Kids today, not so much. That's why we partnered with today's sponsor, ProtonMail. A child can start building a digital footprint before they're even born. And from there, it just keeps going. School logins, apps, email accounts, social media, all quietly stacking into a permanent online identity that those kids never asked for. And if you want proof that this stuff follows you forever, just open your own inbox. Most of us made our first email account when we were, like, 12 years old, with a username that honestly should stay buried. I'm looking at you, Darklord 42069. And now that same inbox is a landfill of spam ads, tracking, and promotions from A website you visited once in 2016. The reality is, email has become one of the biggest sources of personal data collection online. Every message, every signup, every click can be tracked, stored, and used to build a profile on you. That's where ProtonMail is different. It's built around privacy first with end to end encryption, no ads, no tracking, and no profiling of your data. Instead of your inbox being a tool for advertisers, it's actually yours again, private, secure, and under your control. And getting started is simple. You can sign up for a free account and start using a clean, secure inbox right away. If you care about your privacy online, this is one of the easiest steps that you can take. Using my link. Proton Me Pearlmania 500. That's Proton Me Pearlmania 500. One more time. Proton Me Pearlmania 500 or check the link in the description. All right, Mrs. P. The last Broadway musical that was made into a movie choice was mine.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

Now what is yours?

[B]

A Star is Born.

[A]

They didn't make that into it. That's not a Broadway musical.

[B]

No, they're making it into a Broadway musical.

[A]

Oh, really?

[B]

It goes both ways. There's Broadway musical that get turned into movies, and sometimes there's musical movies that get turned into Broadway shows.

[A]

Okay, got it.

[B]

Sometimes there's just movies that get turned into Broadway shows. Like Mean Girls.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Sometimes we'll just be like, we can.

[A]

We're Legally Blonde.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. Music this up.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay.

[B]

A star is born.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

It. The quote says, tragic story of love and music.

[A]

Okay. And which star is born? Is this because there's like multiple stars?

[B]

It's the Lady Gaga one.

[A]

Oh, Lady Gaga. Lady Gaga with her and Bradley Cooper's old face.

[B]

Yes, Bradley Cooper. Old face. Face.

[A]

Okay, got it. And so we're getting in the shallow. The shallow. In the shallow. The shallow. Can we just sing the whole song right now?

[B]

No, we should not do that because we're going to get copyright claimed. If you can't get copyright, you're going to sound too much like him.

[A]

I'm going to sound too much like him because you're from Philadelphia and I'm a little flat. Yeah, yeah. That's just how that is.

[B]

So listen, this.

[A]

I was going to do the Gaga part, though.

[B]

I want to hold my hand. I love that you think you could do the Gaga part.

[A]

I can do the Gaga part.

[B]

You think that you can do the goggle.

[A]

I can do the Gaga part. When I'm in the cloud. I believe I can do negative three. Negative Three? Yeah, they said negative. Three for a star.

[B]

Excessive sex, violence, immorality, and worldview problems. Sometimes excessive content, such as violence, is in otherwise redemptive movies. That's their warning.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

It has heavy language, moderate violence, moderate sexual, heavy nudity. But guess what? Four stars. Four out of four stars. It's entertaining. Af.

[A]

Oh, my God. Now, there's a thing we haven't touched on on a few other ones. I do want to see it on the top here. Just because they have this fun little chart.

[B]

Yeah, there's a chart.

[A]

There's a chart at the top of all these different things. So it says Starsborn 2018. And. Can I just. Can I just Real fast.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Language. They go right to the red. Heavy language, violence, moderate sex, moderate nudity. Heavy, Heavy nudity. They're like, heavy nudity on this.

[B]

Yeah, buddy.

[A]

And this is just. And this is. By the way, this is the. In the shallow, Shallow movie. Yeah. How many times is this played on Delilah?

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

People listen to this on Delilah and they're like, listen, I know you like the song.

[B]

Hold on, I need.

[A]

This is from Joanne. Gaga era.

[B]

Joanne was one of my. My favorite.

[A]

G. That's your favorite Gaga.

[B]

Oh, I love Jo.

[A]

Me. I liked it when she came back.

[B]

Which one? Chromatica?

[A]

No, the most recent one. On Fire. That's me. That's my Gaga.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I need a disco stick when I get a Gaga.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

There's. I think there's a lot. I think this.

[B]

A Gaga episode.

[A]

Just give me a second.

[B]

I'm listening.

[A]

When Gaga goes. Joanne.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

When she gets more into that, like, almost country thing, I'm like, listen, Gaga, I love you.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You're doing great. You're doing this. Amazing. Yeah, Leave that for other people. They need it. Other people. That's the. That suck for some people. That's the only thing they can do.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Only Gaga can be Gaga, though.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So, you know, I just. That's how I feel about it.

[B]

I know. I understand. But I did love the Joanne moment.

[A]

It's a good moment. No, I'm saying it's a good moment.

[B]

She had on these cropped tank tops, so her underboob was always showing, and a pink cowboy hat icon. Okay, I loved it.

[A]

I just. I just. I liked it for a minute. Yeah, I liked it. Structured hats, obviously. A millennial. We're all there.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But now that she's back, five bar

[B]

shows with just a piano. It was a moment.

[A]

No, it's a moment. It's a moment. But now that she's back.

[B]

Oh, she's fully back.

[A]

She needs back. Listen, we need her in latex, all right? We need her in leather. We need her surroundings.

[B]

Feathers, meat. Just all the things.

[A]

Yeah. Surrounded by twinks, standing on balconies, pointing at people. Yeah.

[B]

Oh, that's when she's at her best.

[A]

That's what she said. Balcony Gaga is. Is the scariest and honestly the best Gaga. Let's go to content.

[B]

So real quick, before we go to content, I do want to just read you their general overview. I haven't been doing the general summary.

[A]

Got it.

[B]

But I think the general summary of this one is pretty funny because they

[A]

gave it four stars.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because they love it. They're just like, not for the family.

[B]

A Star Is Born is an artfully made. Is artfully made, period. Both Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga deserve high praise for their performances. Cooper deserves a nod for directing as well. Everything comes together for a well made drama that pulls at the audience's emotions from start to finish. Unfortunately, the story takes a depressing turn as the couple's life together falls apart. By the tragic ending, the characters are left without hope, leaving viewers feeling the same. The lack of redemptive ending, the obscene lewd content and constant substance abuse makes this Star is Born the least acceptable version of a well worn tale.

[A]

Because there's been multiple stars.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But what I will say is what it's starting to slowly feel like.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because again, the redemptive element is a big thing. They always push to like, yeah, you can sin.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

As long as you find God at the end.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But honestly, brother, if you want a tale that always has a redemption at the end, watch Parks and Rec. Every episode of Parks and Recognition ends in redemption and figuring things out. Community, all those different things you is that movie. Not every story has redemption.

[B]

Yeah. And especially when it comes to substance abuse.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

They don't all end well.

[A]

Yeah. And also that's just how it goes.

[B]

So anyway, content warning.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I got roro.

[A]

Roro, which we know is romance.

[B]

Okay. I got pa. Pa. Just one pa. Single pie.

[A]

Just single pa. Strong pagan worldview.

[B]

Ho ho, ho, ho ho.

[A]

I thought heard lesbianism and sodomy.

[B]

Lesbianism and sodomy.

[A]

Yeah. HOHO is strong homosexual worldview and homosexual elements including sodomy and lesbianism.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

LLL ll that is numerous obscenities and profanities. More than 25.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That means they're sitting there with.

[B]

Okay, I need you to know there is a subcategory in here. Just says foul language that we haven't seen this yet. Another ones.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

It says at least 103obscenities, mostly F words and mostly strong profanities. Plus there's a depiction of a man urinating on himself while drunk.

[A]

Is that really happened? I've never seen the movie.

[B]

Wait, you never saw A Star Is Born?

[A]

I never saw this. I've never actually. I've never seen any Star Is Born.

[B]

You never saw the Barbra Streisand of Starsborn?

[A]

I don't think I've ever actually. Besides, I think Meet the Fockers. I don't think I've actually ever watched a Barbra Streisand movie. I know. We've talked about her multiple times on this show.

[B]

Holy.

[A]

Yeah, my grandma was super into Barbra Streisand, so.

[B]

Because you're supposed to be. She's an icon. Okay. She's everything.

[A]

Okay. I'm just saying, this is just one of those things where I.

[B]

But you're correct. They did count it. They counted at least 103.

[A]

It's crazy. They sat there. But then also, like, we should make a note that he put pisses in his own face.

[B]

Yeah, he pisses himself.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I like that. A 103 F bombs is just as bad as pissing yourself.

[A]

That's. That. They're equivalent.

[B]

Yeah, but also.

[A]

And also not finding Christ.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because isn't that what all this is about?

[B]

What was.

[A]

Okay, VV VV I think it's probably violence. Right? Let's see. Yeah. Moderate violence may include some blood. Oh, did somebody get punched in the face?

[B]

Yeah, there's some fighting. There's like a bar fight. A man punches another guy.

[A]

Yeah. So there's probably.

[B]

And then the ending is. Is violent in its own way.

[A]

Okay, got it, got it, got it.

[B]

A, a, A, that's alcohol. Alcohol. I think it's gonna be.

[A]

It's alcohol. It's heavy. Heavy drunkenness.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Alcoholism and. Or abuse.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

And that's like a whole character's whole backstory.

[B]

Yeah. That's Bradley Cooper.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Then the movie.

[A]

In the movie.

[B]

Not Bradley Cooper.

[A]

We're not accusing him of anything outside of the movie.

[B]

Entertainment comedy history.

[A]

Hey, Bradley. Go Birds.

[B]

Yeah, go.

[A]

All right, we see you at the Eagles games in the. In the owner's box.

[B]

See us because of that Cool new bluff.

[A]

Now, ddd, DDD is smoking and heavy illegal drug use and. Or illegal drug sales, which you already mentioned.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hold on, Let me. I found another sentence I need to review to you. Strongly romantic worldview. Places personal expression in art and music as the highest good a person can do. So that's negative.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

That's a bad thing.

[A]

Being. Being super into your art. That's too much. Because you should be. Because you should be super into the church.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Hold on real fast. God. Pause. All right.

[B]

Mixed with pagan worldview, highlighting sensual pleasures and addictive behaviors. Plus some scenes are set in a homosexual bar with silly looking drag queens.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

Silly looking drag queen.

[A]

They went to a kid. They went to a gay bar. A gay bar. That's crazy.

[B]

Yeah. Willem's in this movie.

[A]

Willem's in this movie. We love a will.

[B]

Love Willem.

[A]

We love a will.

[B]

Shout out Philly yet again.

[A]

Yeah. Stunt queen. What a. I love her, but we love her so much. I. I'm obsessed. Because again, this is. You know what it is? They're mad that this movie isn't their hell house. Oh, yeah. Because the one thing, especially evangelical maga, Christian nationalist people like this, this they love chick tracks, is another one they love to show. Oh, my God. They did these things and they went to gay bars and they drank and they had premarital sex and they did all this different stuff. But now, now they're not that anymore. So now they're good and they're one of us. And so these guys always. They always love to lean into it. There's a tweet that I want to reference that fits into their worldview.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And this is how. How insane of a thing this is. It was by a man named Trevor Sheets.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Okay. And he posted this image. Now this. Look at that. Look at that beautiful image of him and his wife.

[B]

Man and wife getting married.

[A]

That's them. And there's a pastor in the background. Now, again, this man posted this on March 23rd. He wrote the following. My wife was formerly promiscuous. I was a virgin. That's how it opens.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

All right. She was then radically born again, committed to the church, evangelize, evangelized, constantly puritan books in her bedroom, prayer journals, grief over past sexual sin, etc. We got to know each other well for over a year, dated for four months, engaged for two and a half, and didn't sin sexually with one another. Our first kiss with each other was at the altar on our wedding day. Reaction. Pick attached. We've been married for over five years now. And she's been the most wonderful and godly wife, mother to our three children and homemaker that you could imagine. She's more pure than most virgins. As biblical purity has less to do with past sins, though they certainly matter. And more to do with one's current posture of the heart and daily decisions to honor the Lord. And then he quotes the book of Matthew. Okay, this keeps going.

[B]

Oh my God, this is how it is.

[A]

It's so long. And he's like, we're far too. This is another line. He compares his wife to a prostitute. He says, we're far too quick to forget the story of the woman labeled as a known known sinner, likely a prostitute in Luke who was washing Jesus's feet with her tears while kissing them too. The Pharisees were shocked that Jesus let a public sinner do this. Jesus responded with a parable about debts being forgiven and ended with this powerful conclusion. Her many sins have been forgiven. That's why she loved. But. That's why she loved much. But the one who is forgiven little loves little.

[B]

Okay, what prompted him to post this?

[A]

Nobody knows. He just out of nowhere was just like, yeah, this is my ex slut wife.

[B]

You know what? I bet you every day of his life he reminds her in the most miserable, condescending, cunties way.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Like if she does anything wrong, she makes any mistake, he's like, well, you were a. And I saved you. You know what I mean? He lured that over her to the point where he posted a six paragraph essay letting everybody know that he thinks in his mind his wife was a.

[A]

Yes. That's a hundred percent.

[B]

That's crazy.

[A]

But this is the mentality we keep hearing about. Redemptive.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That's been going through this. So as you're reading that, I was like, oh, they're mad at the end of this movie.

[B]

Yeah. They have a subsection on this specific group that just, just is titled Miscellaneous Immorality.

[A]

Oh, do they?

[B]

And they're like, what is the miscellaneous immorality in this episode? Two people take marriage very lightly.

[A]

That is. Can I tell you, every one of these also have a very short description. Like Moulin Rouge had a thing about red windmills and stuff like this. That should be.

[B]

Two people take marriage very lightly. Can I tell you, I don't think that's even true. Lady Gaga took her marriage very seriously in the movie. It just so happens she married an addict and that sometimes can go wrong. And. And sadly. And you know what it is? You know, you know what the fuck it is? I know what it is.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Is at the end of the movie. Okay, what's the thing where I have to tell people, spoiler. Spoiler alert. I'm gonna tell you what the end of the movie is.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

At the end of the movie, the. The husband, the main character, Bradley Cooper, hangs himself.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Okay. He dies of his addiction.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

His depression and all of that. And he. And takes his own life. Okay. And lady.

[A]

He drowns in the shallow.

[B]

Literally.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And Lady Gaga is very sad about it. It's. It breaks her heart. She has been with this man through thick and thin, trying desperately to make this marriage work.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And at the very. The other thing that happens is when they meet, she's a waitress and he's a famous star. Right. And then they get together and his fame wanes and she becomes popular because she can sing, and he kind of like introduces the world to her and her music.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And so because of that, she becomes very, very popular. Okay. No, this is not about you. She becomes very, very popular after. Basically not right after he dies, but because it's happening while he's getting really, really depressed. Her star is rising. A star is born. And his sinking into the depression, that has something to do with him not being able to accept that she is actually more talented and famous than him. And she doesn't stop being a famous pop star.

[A]

Nope.

[B]

Because he passes away. She accepts that. He passes away. She moves on with her life. There's a very, very sad moment where she sings this incredible song at an award ceremony where she honors his. The love and legacy of their marriage, but she goes on with her life. And I think that's the part they don't like. Like that she keeps going on with her life, that she is a successful woman after the fact that she doesn't just grieve and give up on her dreams because a marriage failed. And that's the part that I think they don't like.

[A]

Basically, they don't like the fact that she says, I'm off the deep and watch as I dive in I'll never meet the ground that's what they're fat at.

[B]

I don't think you can do this.

[A]

I don't think. I think I can.

[B]

I don't think you can. Should we get to another movie?

[A]

Crash through the surface where they can't hurt us we're far from the shallow

[B]

now I'm not gonna sing because I cannot.

[A]

In the shallow, shallow I'm gonna make

[B]

you watch this movie.

[A]

In the shallow, shallow, shallow now the

[B]

next one that you picked.

[A]

Yes. Okay, so here's the thing. I like a very specific type of musical. Yeah. It needs to be silly or Jewish. So when I went first, I went silly. Okay. I went very silly. And tell me what they have. Little Shop of Horrors.

[B]

No review. The.

[A]

Are you talking about?

[B]

There is no review to Little Shop of Horrors. Not on there.

[A]

It's an incredible movie. It's a. It's one of my favorites. Steve Martin.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

As the. As the Dentist.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

The entire thing. It's so fun. They don't have Little Shop.

[B]

Too campy. They couldn't possibly watch it.

[A]

They couldn't. They couldn't handle that.

[B]

They couldn't.

[A]

Well, they couldn't handle a draft. Drag show in the middle.

[B]

Let's go to.

[A]

Okay, my next choice. My next. Okay, I'll skip ahead.

[B]

Next choice.

[A]

Okay, my next choice was. All right, a Rocky Horror Picture Show.

[B]

They did not have a review of that.

[A]

They don't have a picture of Rocky Horror.

[B]

No, but I looked it up.

[A]

Christians need to know whether or not they can watch Rocky Horror Picture show with their kids. They should. It has a redemptive story at the end.

[B]

It has a really good love story.

[A]

It does. As I would. I want to know. I would die watching them. Just tap. Yeah, just click.

[B]

Clicking their numbers.

[A]

Clicking the numbers. How many times did they say trend Sexual Transylvania.

[B]

I. When I was looking up the. Trying to find the Rocky Horror Picture show review on the movie guide website.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

It would not show it to me, obviously, but it kept popping up. Rocky and Rocky 5.

[A]

But not Rocky 4.

[B]

No, not Rocky 2 or 3.

[A]

They just.

[B]

Rocky 5.

[A]

But why not? It's so crazy that those are the two Rockies. What a bat. Okay.

[B]

And then Creed. Like Rocky Horror Picture Shows.

[A]

But. And I think it's part of. It's because the website now, they focus on movies as they're coming out. Yeah. They're going. Okay, okay, okay. All right, I got one more. Okay, one more. Tell me if they have it.

[B]

It.

[A]

Cabaret. Bob Fosse's Cabaret. Do they have it? Because you and I went and we saw Cabaret. We saw matinee showing a cabaret and then we sat together in a car silently while we were stuck in traffic in the rain.

[B]

Saw a matinee of Cabaret on Broadway with Orville Pack.

[A]

Yes. And it was spit on me.

[B]

It was incredible.

[A]

It was the best day of my life.

[B]

Yeah, he.

[A]

He started. He was singing the mic during the Money song and spit hit my glasses.

[B]

Hasn't washed his face since.

[A]

It's flex of it. But now he's doing a movie with Andrew Schultz. So I'm like, nah, Orville, keep them. Keep the mask on. Keep the mask on, you handsome man.

[B]

So this cabaret.

[A]

What's the review of Cabaret. It's got to be. I'm gonna. Let me guess, let me guess. Four stars. They're gonna give it a plus one because it's an important message. But there's some gay stuff in there and all the other things. The Fosse version takes the gay characters and just makes them bi in this really weird way. So there's gonna be some play with that. So I'm gonna. Guess I'm gonna get. Actually, no, because there's so many giga. I'm going to give it a minus one. But they're gonna like the Nazi stuff, so that's gonna give it a little bit up. So I'm gonna go with minus 13 stars because it is a little bit of experimental at the end.

[B]

No review.

[A]

I'm sorry, no review. There's no review of Cabaret?

[B]

Nope.

[A]

Cabaret. No, they don't review Cap.

[B]

It's not there. But guess what? I. I was, I was. I had your list and I said they don't have Little Shop of Horrors. They don't have a Rocky Horror Picture Show. Have Cabaret. I'd have nothing for Alex's part in this. So I looked up a musical that I know that you really liked so we could find out the review of the Greatest Showman.

[A]

Okay, you know what? Okay. They have a review of the Greatest Showman.

[B]

Absolutely.

[A]

And we're all going to hear it right after this because I need a minute. There's never been a better time to launch your new business with Shopify. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world. Shopify powers 10% of all E commerce in the United States. Shopify has tools that help businesses grow and succeed. Choose from hundreds of templates and customize to match your brand. Shopify is built to scale with your business. Reach your customers wherever they are. Create social and email campaigns on their built in marketing tools. It's time to turn those what ifs into with Shopify today. Sign up for our $1 per month trial today at shopify.com too many.

[B]

Go to shopify.com toomany that's shopify.com too many.

[A]

And we're back. If you didn't like that ad, join [e-mail] and then you wouldn't have to wait to watch me react to Mrs. Pearlmania reading the Christian movie guides Review of the Greatest Showman. A musical movie that we now know is probably just full of lies. Is incredibly full of lies. That is a bag of shit. And that Hugh Jackman is a bad person as well.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Who is close personal friends with Rupert Murdoch and more.

[B]

Okay. We already covered that in last week.

[A]

I know we did. I know.

[B]

Let me tell you what they titled this review because some of the reviews get titles.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

They titled this one Promoting human Dignity, Family, Tolerance and Capitalism.

[A]

Shut the fuck that. Really? That is the full bus. The pull quote that they created.

[B]

That was their human dignity and capitalism.

[A]

The freak show guy. The freak show guy. The freak show guy. They think is promoting human dignity.

[B]

Yeah. And tolerance.

[A]

And tolerance.

[B]

Yep. Things that capitalism is.

[A]

No, he ran a human zoo.

[B]

Negative two. Extreme caution for older teenagers and adults. But four stars.

[A]

Are these. Okay. All right. No, that makes sense. Can I tell you why it makes sense?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Can I tell you why it makes sense?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I've seen what they cheer for. I've seen who they vote for. Of course, these idiots. These idiots think this. We do things a little bit differently around here. Millennial burger, joint of a goddamn slap together musical. Would think that this is good.

[B]

Guess what?

[A]

What?

[B]

There are no abbreviations.

[A]

What?

[B]

They're under the content summary that I've been going over. They don't have any.

[A]

They don't have anything.

[B]

No. It says light, mixed pagan worldview. Contains romantic, slightly politically correct elements promoting pursuing personal dreams and treating human outcasts, including people with physical disabilities and strange physical appearances, but also people with androgynous traits like a buxom and bearded lady. And brief images in one scene of a character who looks like a man wearing makeup and a dress. So there's a subs. So there's a subtext with pro homosexual connotations, but it's mixed with a strong moral and light redemptive elements, including family man cherishes his wife and two daughters.

[A]

I want to die. Because they love the lies. And. And this is the thing. They're talking about him being a family man, which we know that he buried a fish lady afterwards.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

All this other different stuff. There's stuff about, oh, look, he likes androgynous people. Like a lady with a beard. A bearded lady is not. Okay, whatever. I'm not gonna go into that. But they want to act like he's this moral, upstanding man. Why don't you tell him what his grandkids did? Remember you told me we couldn't fit that in the episode. Tell me about the famous things. The bachelor party that his grandsons invented.

[B]

Well, yeah, because I was interested when I wrote the episode for last week. I was like, what happened to all the money Right. Because like, there's family money at that

[A]

point for the Barnums.

[B]

And I'm like, so what were the grandkids doing with the money? And I found out that one of his grandsons, I think Herbert Seeley, he ended up being a part of what was called the Seeley Affair.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Which was the most notorious bachelor party that had ever happened. The greatest bachelor party on earth.

[A]

Somebody said, oh, wow.

[B]

And basically it. They rented out an expensive restaurant and they hired an exotic dancer. And I think her name was like Little Egypt. And they had her getting ready to jump out of a cake nude and do a. She had a special dance called the Coochie Coo.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And it was going to be this whole thing, but they got raided by the cops and then it was all over the press and the newspaper. Because at the time like the. During the Gilded Age, people were starting to accumulate wealth that weren't in like born into wealth.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So like there was this whole restaurant culture that was coming up. There was articles about gossip about what the rich and wealthy were doing in newspapers. So when this Sealy affair came out as. As it was called called, it was like these people doing this bachelor party and people finding out that really, really wealthy people had these like incredibly sexually perverted parties was like. Blew the lid off of. I'm sorry. Blew the cake lid off of the truth about what rich people were doing behind closed doors.

[A]

Basically. This was the Epstein files of their day.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

With Little Egypt doing the Coochie Coo dance.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And. But, but most importantly, when you told me this, you were like, they basically. This basically was the moment when naked lady coming out of a cake.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Became a trope and became a thing. It's from P.T. barnum's grandson.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Who these guys think treated humans. Incredible.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And really knew about human dignity and capitalism.

[B]

Let me tell you, reading the next sentence. Married man stays faithful to despite temptation.

[A]

That didn't happen. She hated him.

[B]

As soon as his wife died, he skipped the funeral and married a 20 year old.

[A]

This is driving me insane. You love lies.

[B]

Move. The movie stresses a biblical belief in human dignity of all. The human dignity of all people. There's a clear clergyman at the grave site of a boy's father with the boy. And the movie says that the greatest are art is making people happy. Plus a very strong pro capitalist theme where protagonist does all he can to provide for his family, comma, give people enjoyment and give work to less fortunate people with disabilities. But he sometimes bends or breaks the rules to do it.

[A]

That's miscellaneous immorality inside your own little grouping there. That's so crazy.

[B]

This I love plus as in good plus. A very strong pro capitalist theme.

[A]

I just. I'm losing my mind on this because when I. We were watching this movie, I was like, yes, this is what corporate America thought woke. Obama term was like, yeah, this was like. This was like a steampunk woke.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

When I was watching the movie in like the worst way. Because like when I was watching and I was like, this is just so that. That corporate. Oh, my God. We created Zendaya. You know, we created her character in a whole cloth. We created Zac Efron's character out of nowhere, but like, they also made him drink. Where's drinking is in it?

[B]

Alcohol use. Alcohol use. Especially in one scene where two men drink after drink but don't act drunk.

[A]

That's insane. Well, that's insane. Can I. Okay, Mrs. P. Okay.

[B]

There's something I have to tell you

[A]

about this because I'm dying. I'm dying here.

[B]

Here. I never noticed this until this, this specific review, but if. When you want to address comments. So let's say you watch this movie and you get so mad or I'm sorry, in this case, you're so grateful. What a beautiful movie. Is the Greatest Showman. Right? I love this movie. On the bottom right of a lot of these reviews, they provide you address comments too, where you can mail or email or call the people that made this movie and leave them your positive or negative comments. So on the right of this move, bottom right of this movie, it says address comments to James Murdoch, CEO, Rupert Murdoch, executive chairman of Murdoch 21st Century Fox. And then it has the address 1020.

[A]

We're not gonna read the address.

[B]

We're not gonna read the address because.

[A]

Because the thing is, is that doesn't exist anymore. No, because this, this department of Fox sold to Disney. Yeah, this is a Disney movie now. Its own 20th and 21st.

[B]

There's also a phone number here.

[A]

But also.

[B]

Should I call them?

[A]

No, because I would like to speak

[B]

to Rupert Murdoch, please. Please.

[A]

We'd like to call Rupert Murdoch.

[B]

Some comments I'd like to address about your Rupert Murdoch.

[A]

Dear Rupert Murdoch, we would like to call to tell you about what we think about your. Your son's godfather's movie. Movie. Because that's right. That's right. Hugh Jackman, Wolverine himself is Rupert Murdoch

[B]

talking about movies you love, like the Greatest Showman. Okay, the next one I picked was Sweeney.

[A]

Wait, I didn't even get it. Didn't get to pick one that I wanted to do.

[B]

Well, because you picked. Yeah, they didn't pick. They didn't have Cabaret. They didn't have Rocky. Our Picture Show.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

But I knew that you were very theory. You had enthusiastic opinions about the Greatest Showman.

[A]

Okay, that's not how that works.

[B]

Like, that would be yours.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

All right. Okay. My next one is Sweeney Todd.

[A]

Okay. Yeah. Pretty decent movie.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, it's a decent movie. I like Sweeney Todd.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

It's been a long time since I've seen that movie.

[B]

Guess how they describe it? How do they describe song, dance, blood, revenge and disgust? Okay. It has a negative four. That's a high negative.

[A]

Yeah, I mean, that's a high negative. But I mean, I don't. I'm trying to think of. Or. What do they say next to that negative four?

[B]

Intentional blasphemy.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Evil, gross, immorality.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

To be avoided.

[A]

To be avoided.

[B]

This movie is to be avoided by everyone. By everybody. Avoid this movie completely.

[A]

Okay. Because I was gonna say, like, if

[B]

I would avoid it because it has Johnny Depp in it. That's why I would.

[A]

There is that. There is that. That.

[B]

But it's got a hell in the bottom card.

[A]

I know, but the thing is. The thing is, I was thinking about is, you know, obviously, you know, we have a toddler now, so we think about, like, what movies are appropriate to watch, to be, you know, and it's

[B]

not so much about not appropriate. It's about a murderous barber.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

This isn't for kids.

[A]

And. And cannibalism.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I think everyone always forgets, like. Yeah. They turn them into sausage. I'm like. And then people eat the sausages. You're making people into cannibals.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So, like, that is. That's bad.

[B]

Alan Rickman's in this movie. Alan Rickman's in the movie.

[A]

I haven't seen this in, so. It's been so long, actually, what's crazy about Sweeney Todd? Whenever I think about it, I always think of.

[B]

Anyways, go ahead.

[A]

No, that's Les Mis.

[B]

Oh, you're right.

[A]

That's Les Mis.

[B]

I'm just picturing Helena.

[A]

You're just picturing Helena Bonham Carter in the 1800s costume.

[B]

She. That's not a costume.

[A]

That's just how she dresses. That's just how she dresses.

[B]

That's just her.

[A]

Helena Bonham Carter always, in every character she played from basically 2006 until about 2019, always looked like a bird is about to fly out of her hair. Yeah, that's just kind of the look of like there's just a bird's about to fly out of that hair. That's is when I think of Sweeney Todd, you know, I think of. But Gili.

[B]

Huh?

[A]

The movie Gigli.

[B]

I do not know why that. Why would you.

[A]

Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck.

[B]

I don't think I ever saw that.

[A]

Oh, wait, no, not Gigli. Jersey Girl.

[B]

Jersey Girl, yes. Okay.

[A]

Because that is the movie where Ben Affleck and his daughter, they sing from Sweeney Todd in it. Because there's a whole part at the end where the kids are singing movie music. And all the kids do Cats and they. She really wants to do Sweeney Todd. And it's like a little scan and it's like the end of the movie Jersey Girls was thinking of. But the reason why I thought Gili is because Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez were both together in that movie. In both movies, yeah. And in Jersey girl, she does the 90s mom thing. JLo dies.

[B]

God.

[A]

She dies early in the movie, and so it's Ben Affleck raising her along with George Carlin as the grandpa.

[B]

Okay, listen, we gotta get.

[A]

It's not a bad movie. All right? Get to the content of Sweeney Todd.

[B]

Sweeney Todd. Okay, Pull up your guide. We're gonna need it. Okay, first one. Papa.

[A]

Papa is strong pagan worldview.

[B]

Ab, A, B, A B, A B,

[A]

A, B, all the way to the top. That strong anti biblical, anti Christian or anti Jewish worldview or elements. Hey, you know what? That would have fit in Fiddler on the Roof when the Cossacks Are Burning down the Village.

[B]

That would have fit on Fiddler.

[A]

That would. Abab. Would have fit right in there, right? Ababa.

[B]

What's fr.

[A]

Fr.

[B]

Freedom.

[A]

Freedom. Strong non Christian worldview. Heresy or false religious elements?

[B]

False religious. That's what Fr.

[A]

Yeah. Oh, you know what false religions are?

[B]

What?

[A]

Mormonism or legalism. They have a. They actually point that in this website. It's like, yeah, Mormonism is fake.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Yeah. Don't tell Glenn Beck.

[B]

Wow. What's H H?

[A]

H H H H is light humanist worldview or humanism. That includes Marxism. Communism. Oh, they view that as humanist. What's co. CEO? That's just straight up communism.

[B]

Oh, they. It's communism.

[A]

Yeah. They're like, hey, communism.

[B]

Okay, let me just read you some of this summary, all right? Strong pagan worldview where revenge is glorified, murder is justified.

[A]

Yes, it is.

[B]

And cannibalism is made to be funny.

[A]

Yeah. Okay. It's a musical. I don't know. Okay.

[B]

With anti biblical content. As main character refers to attaining salvation through murder and releasing others of their sins by killing them. One quick false religious element. As character mentions quote, the Fates have favored the main character. I.

[A]

They, they Wait, they say they just. The fate. Just the concept of fate.

[B]

The concept of fate.

[A]

Because they're picturing it as the Fates. Like the Greek Fates.

[B]

Yeah, exactly.

[A]

And they're like, that's false. Pagan. That's pagan.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

These people are. These are like insane people. I love this.

[B]

There are six light obscenities and no profanity.

[A]

Oh.

[B]

But there is a term used for urination and very graphic. And violence. Includes multiple scenes of murder with extreme amounts of blood, all involving throats being slit and also a man having his head bashed in.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Bodies falling down a chute and necks breaking on the ground. Body parts in meat grinders.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

That's the whole movie.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

Also, it involves a youth who drinks gin until he passes out. Yeah, you gotta look out for the gin.

[A]

Yeah. You can't.

[B]

Especially this time period.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

This time period is not great for gin.

[A]

Yeah, got it, got it, got it.

[B]

But, yeah, I. Listen, there is a lot that they hate about this movie, but it feels like all the things they hate are just like the basic, basic plot of the movie.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

They're like, it involves blackmail and theft and he's a bad role model.

[A]

You're like, yeah, he's the Butcher of Fleet Street.

[B]

That's the whole thing.

[A]

Yeah, that's the whole story. But again, here's the thing. They would love this movie if in the. If the last song was him accepting Jesus Christ, his own personal Lord and

[B]

savior, forgiven for all the murders. Because once you accept God, then you're forgiven for all the bad things you did. No consequences.

[A]

No consequences. This. It's like when the President says, Every Monday at 8am hey, the war's over. We got Ceasefire. And then every Friday at 5:30pm when markets close. All right. Similar. Listen, I just want to. I want to shoehorn that.

[B]

I know you wanted to shoehorn politics into this episode. I wanted to do that. Doesn't have anything to do with.

[A]

Yeah, but you know what? I just wanted to. I didn't needle everybody. Okay, so you did your. You did. Okay. You did Sweeney Todd.

[B]

Okay. The next one on your list.

[A]

Yes. Can I tell you what it is?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay. Okay. Cuz I picked this one.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because I thought we were having fun.

[B]

Yeah, we're. This a fun episode.

[A]

I thought we were. And then they did not review many of the things that I already picked.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I picked Mamma Mia. Mamma Mia one. Okay. Cuz there's Mama Mia two. Here I go again.

[B]

Not that one.

[A]

Not that one. Mamma Mia one. And this is one of those ones where Mamma Mia. The musical. Was it a musical first or was it a movie first?

[B]

I think it was a musical for first.

[A]

I think it was. It was a Broadway. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But this I'm excited. I'm excited to know what they think of Mamma Mia. Because let's go ahead and remember the plot. Everybody here.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Mama Mia is the plot about how Meryl Streep she. She had a good time.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And she doesn't know which one of these three guys is her baby daddy.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

This is literally a musical version of the Mory Poet show.

[B]

Bronson, Colin Firth and a scars guard. Yeah, get it, Merill. Yeah, get it.

[A]

Meril been. Meril been out there.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And so we're all going to find out.

[B]

She was outside. She was outside with a lot of handsome men.

[A]

You know what she was doing? You know what? She was making eye contact.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

All right. That's what she was making.

[B]

They describe this movie as shrill and stagy.

[A]

What the they. They call the Meryl Streep movie.

[B]

Shrill, shrill, shrill. Negative three for excessive sex, violence and immorality. Kind of saw that coming.

[A]

Coming. I mean, I. Okay, so did Meryl Streep. But what I will say here is how dare you? How dare you give Mamamma Mia A minus 3, minus 2? Because I've at this point, I've been viewing minus 2 as PG 13. Yeah, that's been what I've been viewing it as minus 3 is like R. Yeah.

[B]

No, guess what?

[A]

What?

[B]

The worst part, they gave the. The out of the star ratings two stars.

[A]

What the fuck out of four, you gave a Meryl Streep.

[B]

I'll give it to you then. It's a slutty little musical, but it's entertaining.

[A]

It is abba. Yeah, it's an ABBA musical.

[B]

People. There's like whole brunches.

[A]

You create.

[B]

Sing this.

[A]

It created the idea of a jukebox musical, you cunts. Oh my God. Oh my God. Yeah, I'm gonna. I'm losing my mind.

[B]

Okay. Row, row, row.

[A]

Romance.

[B]

So lots of romance.

[A]

Yeah, of course there's a lot of romance. Meryl Streep be fucking. That's the point of the movie.

[B]

Ho ho. That's homosexuality, right?

[A]

I believe. Yes. That was Ho ho. Fifi was feminism. Oh, it does have feminism? Yes, of course. Of course. This is very much.

[B]

Pardon me.

[A]

Of course. This is very much the. Like it. Very much this movie. And, like, Stella got a groove Back are, like, to me, kind of the same. Yeah, it's an island movie. Everybody's kind of figuring things out. Yeah, there's a lot of this. This move with the scarf type of dancing. Yeah, yeah. It has. It has that type of feminine. It has scarf dancing feminine.

[B]

Let me read this to you. Very strong hippie, romantic worldview with strong feminist view where girl searches for her father who could be a one of three men because her mother slept around at the time she was conceived. Plus some solid homosexual references, including men kiss and want to get married.

[A]

Oh, the men want to get married.

[B]

Men want to get married. They're in Greece and they're.

[A]

Hold on. They invented men kissing there. Okay. Did you think the olive oil was for the food? What are we talking about? It's Greece. It's ancient Greece. They put it on the olive oil pots. Exactly what they're doing. Mr. Dirt, do not put that on the screen, okay? Do not. We'll get demonetized. If you put actual Greek pottery art of what the men were doing with the olive oil on the screen, it'll get us in trouble. Okay, but hold on. I'm just. I'm. I'm stuck on this.

[B]

Okay?

[A]

This is so crazy to me because their whole thing is like, oh, they're hippies. That's your people. Now. This was written before the maha party. Switch.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

All of the Meryl Streep. The Meryl Streep style character of this movie. Yeah. Now is Maga. Yeah. Like that. Weird.

[B]

She got pipelined.

[A]

She got pipelined. They. They told her she couldn't get her hair done in 2020. She saw the plandemic movie.

[B]

Yup.

[A]

She was on a Facebook.

[B]

Calls it the jab.

[A]

She calls it the jab. She. It started out as fauci ouchie.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

She called it a fauci ouchie. And by the end now, she was, like, rubbed. She was like, the spoon sticks to my arm.

[B]

She was doing the fake shakes. Take a shower.

[A]

She was doing the fake shakes.

[B]

That was the weird oil that you. Oh, the tallow. The beef tallow.

[A]

The beef tallow. Yeah. She has thoughts about. What's the place? The Shake Shack. No, not Shake.

[B]

Not Shake Shack.

[A]

Steak and shake. Oh, she has big thoughts on.

[B]

Big opinion. There are references to Greek goddesses which are pagan.

[A]

They're in Greece.

[B]

Six obscenities and at least 48 profanities. Now, this part, I was like, wait, what the difference? What's the difference between A and a? Profanity?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Someone who grew up really Christian. Let me know in the comments, because I don't know the difference, and I'm not looking.

[A]

I think obscene might mean like hell or like. Or maybe a gd.

[B]

Oh, okay.

[A]

Because, like, sometimes we'll get dinged for too many gds.

[B]

Oh, okay.

[A]

But I can. I can say I could drop F bombs all day.

[B]

Okay. There is a constant discussion of sex by women.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Period, point blank. If they're mad that women are talking,

[A]

what's funny is they're like, this is a feminist movie. But this movie does not pass the Bechtel test.

[B]

No.

[A]

Because the entire movie is women talking to each other about. About men, which is crazy, and I love that. And I'm obsessed with it.

[B]

During one song, a woman places a mock phallus between her legs. A woman slides down banister hurting herself. Young African American man tries to have relationship with older woman who mocks going down on him. One person turns out to be homosexual, and two men kill timeout.

[A]

Okay. Everything else you listed in there? Yeah, okay, sure. Of course, this racist had a problem with some of that stuff, but. Woman slides down banister sexually.

[B]

She was having too much fun.

[A]

Oh, my God. This is the same.

[B]

This is why we can't let women wear pants.

[A]

This is why. This is why.

[B]

Slide down a banister.

[A]

That the way this guy pictures a woman sliding down a banister is the reason why people think witches ride brooms. Yeah, it's lit. I like. I don't want to explain that, but just know that's. That's how those go together.

[B]

Brief rear male nudity.

[A]

We saw, but.

[B]

We saw, but.

[A]

Whose butt is that? I don't remember.

[B]

I don't know. Is it some upper male nudity? That just means shirtless, lots of alcohol. Some get drunk.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Lying in deception.

[A]

They're in Greece. What else is there to do? There isn't much of an economy.

[B]

Okay, you. We said you're not got. You got to stop bullying Greece.

[A]

I'm not trying to bully Greece, all right? They dearly ruined our honeymoon.

[B]

The Greeks are in the comments letting us know that they do not appreciate you talking all this on Greece.

[A]

Oh, okay. Well, the team up with Maine. Okay. You want to get in the comments.

[B]

Oh, oh, okay. Wait. Now I'm picturing it, because if you have Maine and Greece getting together. Think of the food. Think of the food. A lot of lemons. A Lot of blueberries. I love a lemon.

[A]

It's just a diner lobster. Oh, it's just a Greek diner lobster.

[B]

Okay, great. Oh, yeah.

[A]

Which is a great SNL sketch.

[B]

Incredible.

[A]

Which also is a musical.

[B]

It's a musical.

[A]

Which is not. Definitely not been reviewed on here. But you know what? We are gonna review this little break right here.

[B]

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[A]

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[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So let's do a lightning round round.

[B]

Oh, lightning.

[A]

Lightning round. And so let's go ahead with your pitch.

[B]

Move it up and speed it up with Greece.

[A]

Oh, my God. Jesus Christ. Okay, so what did the Christian movie Guide think of Grease the Musical?

[B]

They describe it as compromise is the word.

[A]

Oh, my God. There's a. Okay, compromise.

[B]

I wouldn't call it compromise.

[A]

There's Lily. A line asking, did she put up a fight? Okay, what is. Do they think it's for the family?

[B]

Negative two.

[A]

That actually, that tracks. That tracks a little bit.

[B]

Extreme caution. Okay, so PG 13. Okay, but three stars.

[A]

Three stars. Four out of four.

[B]

Yeah. Pretty entertaining. They said.

[A]

I know, it's crazy. That's a minus two. I watched this movie, like so many times in elementary school. Yeah, this was like a go to teacher. Wheeled in the. Yeah, we didn't really have anything to do. They wheeled the TV into the cart. They popped the VHS in. I remember watching this at summer camps.

[B]

Oh, really?

[A]

It was just like. This was like, oh, it's fun. Because no one's really listening to lyrics.

[B]

I just like. I think it was fun when I was younger because it's the. The view of the 50s through the lens of the 70s.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Which I always thought was very cool because they're like. They're like, oh, it's the 50s, but they all have, like, these wing colors and, like, they're dressing like the 50s, but it doesn't make sense.

[A]

Yeah. It's the way that Jen's. When Gen Z tries to do Y2K fashion now.

[B]

And I'm like, you're like, that's not okay. The bottom of your pant legs don't have six inches of water.

[A]

I'm like. I'm like, kid, you're not staring down Armageddon in a war in the Middle East. Wait a second.

[B]

Wait a minute.

[A]

Hold on. Maybe they are doing all the throwbacks.

[B]

Wow. Also, this is one of the movies where I first really realized that they had older people playing teenagers.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Because, like, you're looking at Stalker Channing and you're like, babe. What? You are not in high school.

[A]

Yeah. That's like you.

[B]

Or that Chacha degorio. I think it was him. I'm like, that woman is 35.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Even when I was little, I was like, that woman is not in high school.

[A]

But actually, that's a grown woman. Well, that's the thing. It wasn't until I was an adult that I realized how many roles. Roles were adults playing. Kids.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because. Or teens, especially. Because when you're, like, younger. Like, when I think of When I think about when I was in fifth grade.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And what my brain thought an eighth or ninth grader looked like, they were. That was grown. They look 40.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

When you're like. When you're in fourth or fifth grade, a teenager looks ancient. Yeah.

[B]

And now that looks like John Travolta at 30.

[A]

Yeah. No. 100%. That's what's crazy. It's just the mind's eye type of thing.

[B]

Okay, next. Next list.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Les Miserables.

[A]

Yeah, I put.

[B]

Is Baby.

[A]

I put Les Mis on here.

[B]

Yeah. Because you famously love that musical.

[A]

I. Okay. I like the Anne Hathaway song in the. In the movie. We've never seen the live show, but we've seen the movie.

[B]

I have seen the live show multiple times.

[A]

Okay, that's great. I instead just studied the life of Napoleon iii, which explained a lot about this movie.

[B]

And Victor Hugo Negative one.

[A]

What? Wait, what's the sub. What's the sub on this title?

[B]

Fabulous Redemption.

[A]

You can tell you like it. You can tell they like it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

There's Christian elements throughout the whole fucking thing.

[B]

Yeah. Because the whole thing is that Jean Valjean has redemption after prison.

[A]

Is that. That's the guy? That's Hugh Jackman.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Fucking Hugh Jackman. Oh my God, I forgot I was Hugh Jackman in this movie. Ah, fuck. Because I always think about the other. I always think of Russell Crowe because

[B]

the Russell plays Javert.

[A]

Yeah. The captain. And the only reason I ever think about Javert is solely because of Deep Space Nine. Because there's one character in Deep Space Nine who was always calling. He's a guy who betrays his uniform and joins the Maquis.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And then Benjamin Cisco was like, you betrayed your uniform. He yells. It's a very great scene. Yeah. He's like, he, Avery Brooks is chewing up scenery. You betrayed your uniform. And then like genocides a planet. Yeah. And the whole time this guy I think is Eddington is his name. He's like. He keeps calling Benjamin Cisco. Captain Cisco Javert. Yeah. Because he's like, I'll pursue you to the ends of the earth. He's like, of course you will, Javert. And so there's like this Les Miz reference and I'm like, the whole thing is like. It's very drama, it's very dramatic.

[B]

You know that Amanda Seyfried who is in Mamma Mia. Is also in this movie.

[A]

Yes. I did not like her in this movie.

[B]

Okay. Okay. Helena Bottom Carter also in this movie.

[A]

And cuz her and Sasha Baron Cohen, Master of the house. I like two songs. I like two songs. Because if we were to do anything.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

If we were ever to do a musical together, we would be them. That would be us. We would be as a master of the house. Because it would just be me over here doing this move and you stealing from people.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And the thing is I want you crimes. I want you to know what's about Mrs. P. If Mrs. P plays a criminal in a. In a On theater.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

She's on stage. Yeah. Master of the house. Ended up. If you are a fellow actor in this because I'm assume this is going to be a local production now. Do not have actual money in your pockets.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

She will actually steal you and then she will yell that it's method acting.

[B]

Got it.

[A]

She said method acting.

[B]

Gotcha. So who else is in this film?

[A]

Who?

[B]

Eddie Redmayne.

[A]

Oh, that's right. Yes. You're just listing reasons why.

[B]

Anyway, negative one, but still got four stars.

[A]

Four stars.

[B]

So they think it's incredibly.

[A]

They think it was good quality. Minus one. What's minus one mean? When they scroll back up.

[B]

Okay. Caution advice for older children, including teenagers and sensitive adults. Okay, so older children, sensitive adult. Is that why you don't like this movie?

[A]

I may be a sensitive. I'm going to be too sensitive.

[B]

You're too sensitive. I might be too sensitive to watch Eddie Redmond.

[A]

Okay, let's move on. Okay.

[B]

Chicago.

[A]

That was my pick.

[B]

Y.

[A]

Because I like Shock Chicago.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because of TikTok.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So I didn't like the movie Chicago.

[B]

You had never seen it.

[A]

I had never fully seen. I'd seen like every now and then little things here and there, but it wasn't until the tick tock of the. Oh, yes. Oh, yes. They both did that. The gun. The gun, the gun. And then Richard Gere is doing the thing with the strings.

[B]

And then you looked at me and said that this was a great Richard Gere movie.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

And I said, this is a Catherine Zeta Jones movie.

[A]

And I'm like, anything. You know what's crazy? Richard Gears in the whole movie. Catherine Zeta Jones is only in part of it.

[B]

Yeah. But I don't even.

[A]

Same thing with Renee Zellweger's old face.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

What?

[B]

Wow.

[A]

What? She shouldn't have. Jim carried it.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

She carried her face. Nobody recognizes her now.

[B]

Did that before Jim Carrey.

[A]

I know, but that's. But now I need to call it Jim carrying it. Because nobody ever believed that Renee Zellweger got replaced by a clone.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So I need to make. What happened to her. And then there was also the lady from the. Was it Dirty Dancing?

[B]

Yeah, the. She had a nose job.

[A]

Yeah, she had the nose job. And then she stopped getting work because everyone's like, no, you had a famous nose. She said, but I didn't like my nose. So I got it fixed. And then in her mind, fixed. So in that it's the same thing when you. Uncanny valley. I need people to understand that's exactly what Jim Carrey did.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

He did not get replaced by a clone.

[B]

No, it doesn't make sense. Because how would you age the clone appropriately? If the clone is made, it has to be born and then it has to be aged, what, 50 some years and enough time to then be switched, which it doesn't work. And then the drag had a lower bluff and an upper bless.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

That's all it is.

[A]

And the Picture that that person put up, who I think is like a French mime drag queen or something. They put up like, oh, look, this is the mask I did, claiming that they did this, that they were the one. It was an AI picture. Yeah, there's a fucking AI generated picture. All of this was just bullshit. Jim Carrey is just a weirdo. And he's allowed to be. He's allowed to be a weirdo who should be shamed for the rest of his life life for pushing anti vaccine bullshit alongside a fucking Jenny McCarthy. We can like his movies, we can like his art, we can enjoy all of the sonic movies, but just keep that in back your fucking mind, all right? If the next time you're traveling through Florida, you're like, why does everyone here look itchy from measles? It's because of Jim fucking Carey.

[B]

It's true. Okay, so they describe Chicago as, quote, 1920s, sleazy dancing, jail chicks sold.

[A]

Yeah, no, they nailed it watching that, honestly. Yeah, that's. That is the best way to describe Chicago because famously. Famously, a lot of people, Mr. P included, confuse cabaret and Chicago. Yeah, a lot of us confuse cabaret and Chicago because when the imagery is shown of it, they're very similar imagery. It's 1920s, 30s flappers. There's guys in big suits.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

There's their morality issues, all this other stuff. And the music is like. Like, it has that feel.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And so there's that side of it. So what are our ratings here for Chicago?

[B]

Negative two.

[A]

Just a negative two.

[B]

Negative two. It's got the. It's got a moderate on bad language. A moderate.

[A]

He had it coming. He had it coming.

[B]

A light sex and a light nudity.

[A]

They. They have a whole song about how you need to murder your husband. It's a series of women singing even about how they should murder their husband.

[B]

3 stars for Entertainment quality.

[A]

It's the. It's the Goodbye Earl of musicals.

[B]

Oh, look at you.

[A]

And as we've mentioned on the After Party, our Paywall Patreon podcast, where we respond to your comments, which you've been leaving this entire time on this episode on both YouTube, YouTube, Patreon and Apple podcasts and other places, as we've explained there on that specific podcast, I have heard Goodbye Earl now.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And today I was driving to my car and I would turn on local radio.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And they referenced Goodbye Earl. And I went. I understand that reference.

[B]

Wow. Yeah.

[A]

Goodbye Earl by the Chicks. Great song.

[B]

Great song.

[A]

Great video too.

[B]

10 out of 10.

[A]

Great, great time. So they said this Is not for the kids.

[B]

No. This is a negative two extreme caution for older teenagers and adults. PG 13 and three stars out of four. So they're admitting it's quality.

[A]

No, you honestly. Absolutely. This is a four star movie. This is a four star movie.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It has Queen Latifah in it. It's a four star movie.

[B]

That's true.

[A]

If Queen Latifah shows up in the movie, we're at four stars and right now we're fighting. If you're gonna try to start pulling away stars, Queen Latifah is in the movie.

[B]

Yeah. I need to read you. I know we're doing a lightning round,

[A]

but we have one left after this.

[B]

Okay, okay, listen. Chicago brings audiences top stars. Plenty of top notch dancing and singing, interesting locations, intriguing historical glimpses and colorful sets. It also brings the message that there are no consequences for crime and that life is all about the show. Have you been looking at the news? There are no consequences for crime.

[A]

There's none.

[B]

It's all about the show.

[A]

Crime isn't real. We live. Crime isn't real. We live in kayfabe. We are living in Monday Night Raw. It's Maga Night Raw every day of the week. Everything is a grift. The stock market is a series of scams stacked on top of each other. That's the reason why I love Chicago now. When I was younger and I saw it, it didn't make much sense to me because I'm like, oh, we're getting past that. We're going towards the beautiful Star Trek, the Next Generation future. No, we live in a con artist paradise. And this movie is right.

[B]

Right?

[A]

They both reach for the gun.

[B]

The movie has a dark, gritty feel with an almost exotic dance sequences. And with the weak, amoral story, it's just not worth waiting through the muck to see the stars perform. It honestly feels like a campy 1920s version of the O.J. simpson trial with all its televised pomp and high power lawyers madly spinning the truth.

[A]

I. You know what? I'm not gonna get this episode demonetized by telling that person exactly what they should do. But you know what I think? I think if that person should go watch A Star Is Born and reenact the ending. Okay, so let's do the last musical that we have in the list, Mrs. P. For our lightning round and we. What musical did you pick here?

[B]

Cats.

[A]

The Cats movie musical.

[B]

The Cats movie musical. I wanted to know what they would think.

[A]

The 2019 Cats music movie musical. The Cat. The one that was so bad. This was, like, famously panned.

[B]

What do you mean bad? It has Taylor Swift.

[A]

Yeah, I know. It's real bad.

[B]

Idris Alba.

[A]

I want it. Timeout.

[B]

Dame Judi Dench, James Corden, Sir Ian McKellen.

[A]

Stop it has James Corden. Okay? Also, listen, Taylor, we love you, but whenever you show up in a movie, it's a bad movie. Yeah, that's the thing. Taylor Swift, famously, famously, famously. If she shows up in your movie, you have a bad movie.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That's just how it is. Her music. Her music could be. All right.

[B]

Poor Jason Derulo.

[A]

Jason Derulo is in this. Oh, my God. Okay, so, okay, let me guess. Cats musical.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Cats musical. I'm gonna give it a minus two because that seems like the trend for most of their musical. I'm gonna give it a minus two and I'm gonna give it. This got panned by everybody. I'm gonna give it minus two and one star.

[B]

Okay. The. The title quote says, a redemptive musical tale with multiple tales.

[A]

They did a pun.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

They did a pun. They did a redemptive tale with multiple tales. Yeah. Cat pun.

[B]

Okay, ready?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Family content plus one.

[A]

What?

[B]

Plus one.

[A]

What?

[B]

Moderately questionable elements. Discernment is required for young children, but otherwise.

[A]

Can I tell you what I think plus one is?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I think plus one is, like, basically pg.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, because I want to see other ones. They're like G. Yeah. Or G. Yeah. I don't understand. Once you're plus one, their scale is so crazy.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That once you're plus one. I think you're already there. I think you're clear on this side. So they think this movie is good for kids. Everyone is in cat suits.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

With tight butts.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like there was. Famously. There may have been. We don't know if it's true. Yeah. But they should release the butthole. Cut.

[B]

Okay, so you said one star.

[A]

One star, four stars. Shut the up.

[B]

Incredible quality entertainment right here.

[A]

They thought Cats the musical.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

The movie musical was a four star tour de force.

[B]

An event, strong Christian moral worldview, where cats compete for the one special cat who will go to heaven and be reborn. With multiple crosses shown in a cemetery, forgiveness and salvation are granted. Kindness and compassion are rewarded and immorality is rebuked, including taking advantage of others. Gluttony, stealing and being. Being egocentric. Plus one character uses magic.

[A]

I. I just wanna remind everyone James Corden is in this movie. Tread carefully. It. Everyone I know has ever seen it, said it was the worst thing they've ever seen in their entire life. Every clip I've ever seen of it was horrific. Yeah, it looked awful, I think.

[B]

And this is. This is me having a crazy take. I've seen the original Cats on Broadway, and I thought that was gonna be dumb. I didn't like it. I felt like the original Cats theater show was like. Like a mean joke people played on each other. You know how, like, if something smells bad, you're like, oh, man, this smells so bad. Smell it.

[A]

Oh, why'd you make me smell that?

[B]

That's what I feel like. Cats was like. People were like. They went to see Cats and they were. They were like, oh, my God, you gotta go see Cats. And then it was like a way to trigger. And then their friend calls them a week later and goes, goes, oh, my God. I can't believe how crazy that was.

[A]

There's. I think it's a Tom story or Huck Finn. Yeah, there is, but there is a. There's a Mark Twain story about this where these two guys, these two scammers come into town. Yeah. And they come into town and they get all. They're like, we're gonna have this crazy show three nights only. Crazy show. Everybody coming into town. Every. All the men should come see our crazy show. And they. People showed up. A third of the town shows up, and the guys come out, and there's this two old men, and they just come out naked, and they do a little dance.

[B]

Pants. Yeah.

[A]

And they wiggle around a little bit, and they go, ha. And everyone's like, why do you make me watch that? Oh, my God, that's so gross. And the old man go, if you tell anyone the way you just saw, then everyone will know you're a freak.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You're a freak for liking this. So you better tell everybody else in town that what you saw is the greatest show ever. You saw the best magic of your entire life. And so they did.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So next night, another third of the town showed. And by the third night, when everybody realized that everyone had seen this, now they were allowed to be upset about it.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. That's how Cats was for me.

[A]

That's how Cats felt.

[B]

Yeah. I was like, you guys are just telling us that this is good, but I think you think this stinks. And you wanted to know what my opinion would be.

[A]

Yeah, I think this movie would make me mad. Cats, the movie would make me mad if I was a furry.

[B]

Well, yeah. Oh, as a furry?

[A]

Yeah, I think. I think as a furry, I would be mad. I'm not a furry. But if I was, I would be because Stolen valor. It feels, it feels like they're honestly, it feels like a fur menstrual show. Does that make sense? A menstrual show? No, no, no, no. That one didn't land. No, I don't think good news is at the end of the episode and I know where the retention ends here. So with that, everybody, that's been our episode. That has been our review of Christian reviews from movieguide.org's reviews.

[B]

That's right. It's a non profit of you can donate to this website.

[A]

Don't, don't do it.

[B]

Don't, don't give them money to watch

[A]

these movies and do not see. Was it Biblical Women or whatever it was by Minnie Driver.

[B]

I don't know what Mini Driver Driver's doing. Yeah, remember, See, the only time I think Mini Driver and I love her because she was in Circle of friends in 1995 and that was like one

[A]

of my favorite movies when she grosse point blank.

[B]

Yes, I think so.

[A]

I like gross point blank.

[B]

And so I was always like, I love Mini Driver.

[A]

Anyway, we gotta get out.

[B]

I should do this.

[A]

Guys. Thank you so much. Five stars. All the different reviews, all the different comments. Subscribe like every Sunday at noon for a new episode. Pearlmania500.net for free ad. Free content. Too many frauds and too many scammers that we wish weren't real. Too many cons and too many spammers and we're starting to feel like we've got too many tabs. Open it too many times. Remember to smile.