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Welcome to the Top Advisor podcast, brought to you by Proudmouth's Pod Rocket Academy. I'm your host, Bill Cates, creator of the Cates Academy for Relationship Marketing. In each episode, I interview one of our industry's top performers, getting them to pass on their secrets to success to you so that you can impact more lives and generate more income. Now, on to the show.
B
Welcome, welcome. What really goes on inside a family office? And what can financial advisors learn from those who guide some of the wealthiest, most complex families in the world today? I'm talking with Rich Wolkowitz, an attorney, advisor and founder of Xylogenesis. Rich brings a unique perspective on succession, governance and helping families align around legacy. Whether you work with high net worth clients, family offices, or just want to elevate your thinking, this episode is full of real world insights. But before we get going, did you know I have a new book? It's unlike anything I've written before. It's a business parable co authored with Jeff C. West that's suspenseful, insightful, surprisingly fun. The title is you ready? It's a little long. The title is the Hidden Heist. Stop Robbing Yourself of Lasting wealth, an irresistible tale of financial redemption. The story is set during a bumbled bank robbery, so there's a mix of fun and tension, and explores the beliefs and assumptions that keep many from building wealth or seeking financial guidance. As an advisor, you're very familiar with some of these mistaken beliefs and it shares a few essential principles without really feeling like a textbook and without usurping your role as an advisor. So the Hidden Heist can be a great resource for financial advisors like yourself to give to clients and for clients to give to their adult children. And you'll be happy to know that the book makes a strong case for working with a trusted advisor like you. My personal fitness trainer has read the book and just asked me for three copies for his kids. This is what he said to me. He says this book gives money lessons. I tried to teach my children but didn't think they were listening. They're going to love the story and get those lessons. So if you're curious, just go to thehiddenhiist.com that's thehiddenhiist.com this episode of Top Advisor podcast is sponsored by the fine folks at Ironclad Family, who brings you ivaultx, a financial advisor enablement tool focused on upping your game as a holistic advisor. More about that in a little bit. And now on with today's show. As I mentioned, today's feature guest Rich Wolkowitz. As I mentioned in the tease, Rich is an attorney, an advisor, entrepreneur and the founder of Xylogenesis, a firm that helps multi generational families and their advisors navigate the complexities of family offices, succession, governance and legacy. Rich has a diverse background in law, business, leadership, advisory roles, and he brings a unique kind of inside out personal perspective to what really makes families thrive across generations. So I hope you're ready for an insightful conversation filled with practical takeaways and fresh thinking after this long pre preamble. Rich Wolkowitz, zooming in from St. Louis, Missouri. Welcome to Top Advisor podcast.
C
Hi Bill, great to see you. And congratulations on that book launch. I can't wait to read it. And what great timing to come out during the holiday season for people to be able to give it to others.
B
Hey, well said. And, and everyone listen. I did not prompt Rich to say that. So you're, you're a natural, Rich. You had an interesting path to get where you are today. I think I remember reading you even worked in the White House early in your career, which is not everyone could say that. So if you don't mind, give us just a brief history of Rich Wolkowitz, how you came to be a family office advisor and perhaps how how your life experience experiences shape your mission to serve multigenerational families.
C
Sure. Well, thanks Bill, for, for having me on. And you know, I couldn't, could not have planned how to get to this place in life. It all happened organically and by experience and very naturally. So I'm, I'm here in St. Louis, part of a fifth generation family. So we have deep history and culture in the St. Louis area, in the Midwest. And that really shaped our family as we grew in industry and in business together. And so I grew up as a third generation next generation watching my father lead our family office. And so I had that perspective as a next generation. I went to law school and practiced law for about a decade, but before I got into private practice, as you mentioned, I did work in the White House and it was an attorney there as well. And that really shaped a lot of lessons in life that I was taught as a child, which is speaking truth to power. And if you think about speaking truth to power, you know, in the family finance world, in the family office world, you can't get much more powerful than working at the, in the White House. And so I found really helpful to, to be able to express my opinions even if they were contrary to what belief may be or could be. Distracting, but it was, I was asked to speak truth to power and we got results as a result of that. And so it was really, really reinforcing the belief that my father taught me, which is always speak the truth. And I watch people kind of not, not do that with him because they were afraid of his position and they thought they would just give him advice he wanted to hear instead of advice that he needed to hear. So that really shaped my beginning of my, my career. And when I practice law, most of my clients were family enterprise clients. I shifted away from publicly traded clients and from private equity VC type clients because I felt it was more relationship driven. I can make more of an impact with family enterprise clients. And back in the 1990s, early 2000s when I practiced law, I was an M and a business securities international transactional lawyer. And most of my clients would gravitate from me being their business lawyer to becoming their outside general counsel handling all legal matters. Then I got to really know the whole legal system that impacted the business. And then I really needed to dive in and learn the business. So I devoted a lot of time to my clients learning their businesses. And when in those rooms or in the field or in the factory or on the car dealership lot, I got to talk to them and really got to know them. And so they would tell me their hopes, dreams, fears and aspirations. And that's really when they said, rich, you know our legal, you know our business, you know our personal. Can you begin to coordinate all these other service providers that impact our life and confuse us? And that's really where I became that, a multidisciplinary advisor, learning the skill set to talk to insurance people, bankers, wealth managers, investment advisors, the list goes on and on. To help be that coordinator, I don't want to call it a quarterback because the client's truly the quarterback. We are just in service to the family. And so that's where I really became understanding of what the pressures were, the issues were for all the other advisors, including myself as an attorney, on how best to serve the family. And so from there I did that work for about a decade. And then my family invited me in to lead our family enterprise. So now I had a new lens, what it was like to be a principal responsible for the economic affairs, the financial affairs, and the family dynamic affairs, and trying to balance all of those things. And did that for 15 years until we had a liquidity event and we sold our primary business. And then I went on to become have a new role for families, which was being a non Family CEO for family offices. Two different families I served over a period of five years. And then I had that lens of what it was like to be that person who's the day to day operator and executor and visionary and strategist and gatekeeper and protector for prolific families. So I then decided I really wanted to, didn't want to be captive to any more families. I wanted to provide this type of service to more families. And so that's when I started my own consulting firm, Xylogenesis, in order to help more families serve in this role.
B
As with most of us, it's an evolution and it's amalgamation of different things we've done and skills that all feed into where we are now. Unless you graduated with a degree in finance and started working as an Advisor at age 22 or whatever. For most of us, it really is that evolution. You know, over the years, the 30 years I've been doing this, I've worked with some advisors, consultants to family offices to help them get more referrals, more introductions. And one thing I learned about working with family offices is that you end up sometimes solving some very unusual problems, like the teenager getting arrested for, you know, too much partying. Or as you were working with family offices, did you run into any of those kind of unusual requests or unusual ways to work with your, your family offices or, or in what you do now, do you see that from time to time?
C
Oh yeah. The, you know, the work that really needs to be done in this space, you know, it's, it's two parts of your brain. It's left brain work and right brain work, I like to call it. And there's the quantitative side, you know, the technical side of what we do, and then there's the qualitative side of what we need to do. And I think people get too focused on the quantitative because we're dealing with such large numbers and we're dealing with such sophistication and so many structures that we often forget about our heart and we often forget to have the clients remember that this is a business, a family office is a business for the family. And therefore we need to think with our heart as much as our head. So yeah, I got into all those situations from hoping helping to find a, a rare doctor for a child who had a really bad, terrible disease, to breaking up fights between siblings who made a poor decision on investment. I had to fire a brother in law without the brother in law knowing he was being fired. Because of family harmony. I had to find a position for A family member who wore an ankle bracelet. And how do you do that? And you know, how to find a veterinarian for a cat with cancer. So those are all the kinds of things that, you know, you feel.
B
Yep. So when we were preparing, right before we got on here, we were talking about what we call this, this episode, this show. And you came up with a phrase, because I think it's based on a talk that you give to advisors, financial advisors, from time to time. I think you said how to be the first call advisor. How to be the first call advisor to family office. What do you mean by that? What do you mean by the first call advisor? I think I have a sense. Right. The trusted resource, but put a little more meat on that bone.
C
Sure. So. So in the work I do with family offices, I try to always put my lens into the person or the Persona that I'm dealing with. And so, you know, you really need to embody when you're working with a family. Like, who is the family? What are they really trying to achieve on a macro level? And then you need to break it all the way down to the micro level of who is this person with which lives in this family house that's part of this branch, that's part of this generation? And so when asked to help advisors, I really then use my experience as a, as an attorney, as a consultant, to think, well, what. What do I need in. In order to help break through? And so when asked to speak to advisors, putting on your hat, the initial thing that came to my mind is, how could I. How can you become that first call advisor? So that when a client has an issue, whether it is the quantitative, whether it's the qualitative, who are they going to call? And I think you want to position yourself to be that first call. And so I help work with advisors of all types to really understand how to have that breakthrough, which kind of.
B
Is a perfect lead into the next two questions I want to ask you. I want to ask you about what advisors are doing wrong. A couple of things, maybe examples of what you see, and then we'll flip it and go to what advisors are doing right. And I think that'll kind of fill in, you know, how, how to become that, that first call advisor and how to avoid not being called or whatever. That sounds like a double negative. Anyway, we'll move on. So when it comes to dealing with wealthy families, intergenerational wealth, I know there's a few things that you see advisors are doing all wrong and they're losing Clients or mis serving clients. Can you give me, you know, a couple of real world examples of things that you've seen?
C
Sure. So yeah, So I see it all the time. I come into family systems, I'm often asked to look and assess their entire advisor community. Really interestingly to not avoid your question because the question is what are advisors doing wrong? I think oftentimes the first question and most families have difficult time hearing this, but it goes back speaking truth to power, which is sometimes the advisor is not doing anything wrong. Sometimes the advisor is just perceived as doing something wrong. Happens in many cases is it's the client who's doing something wrong. And so the first step when I come in they say we need to replace this advisor, that advisor. I of course assess them and of course if they need to be replaced, we'll work on that. But the real issue often is is that the client doesn't know how to be a good client. And so first speaking that truth to power to the client and explaining to them because I was a client as a next gener, as a family principal, I was also an advisor sitting on the other side of the table. So what putting on the lens, walking in those other person's shoes, what do they need? Now once you get past the client not being a good client and you teach them what can happen and how do you teach advisors to be good advisors, what other mistakes do they make? Is in this world of family office, I mean true servant leadership is the first step having the right mindset that we're really here to serve the families, we're not here to serve ourselves. And oftentimes advisors will think what's my compensation model? How do I get to this certain compensation? So your advice all to the client is always on what's good for me instead what's good for the client. And clients eventually see through that and and they begin to look at you as transactional rather than relationship driven. And in the family office space you couldn't have more than both heightened sense of both transaction and relationship. And so trying to find the balance on how to navigate that transaction versus relationship. And being a true servant leader, it's really important. And not letting the compensation model be the tail that wags the dog. Things will happen once you really focus on creating that value, creating the relationship, focusing on really strategy for the family on everything. And not having your lens so narrowly focused on self and what the exact mission is that you are there to achieve financial reward to help expand and broaden that out. That's really seems to Be the number one thing that advisors often will become then territorial. They'll become very siloed because they're just focused about on their self and what they need to do to achieve their own KPIs. So throw that out. Be a giver of your time, be a giver of your energy. Be a giver of what's between your ears. The wisdom and clients will appreciate that and you'll get more business and surpass any KPI that you could have ever imagined.
B
You remind me of an interview I encourage our listeners to check out, if you haven't already done that. It's episode number 88 with Barry Banther, who is also an advisor to wealthy families and he shares a few stories. One of them is real quick. There was about 96 million of assets, you know, at stake, so to speak, and transferring to, from the patriarch to two daughters. And this advisor came in to kind of pitch his, his service, et cetera. And the patriarch and the advisor hit it off really well. He ignored the, the, the daughters, one of whom whom had a degree in finance, a master's in finance, the other was a cpa. And the advisor left and, and the patriarch says to the dog, so what do you think? You know, and, and one of them said, I will never work with that guy. He, you know, he totally ignored us. And so my friend Barry, who was who I interviewed for 80 episode 88, went to this advisor and told him, you know, the mistake that he made. And here was the advisor's response. Don't they know who I am now? The arrogance. This family 96 million probably has more than this advisor has, you know, accumulated is. Barry always says, and you're saying the same thing. It's, it's relationship first. They can get the returns, they can get the technical help in a lot of places. What they really need is someone who gets the relationships that are in place and then brings the technical side of things. So let's flip it just for a second. So anything stand out of anything you've seen an advisor do specifically or just in general that they're doing right to win and, or keep the business of these family offices.
C
One of the key things that some advisors do great is one recognizing that they're not the domain expert in everything. Bringing in and incorporating the team of advisors into a healthy way in a collaborative way. Tearing down those silos is extremely important. So many advisors who recognize one. Here are my limitations of talent. Here's my limitation on time. And you know what, it'd be great to collaborate because the wealth manager might be going left, the tax advisor might be going right, the estate plan is going up the middle, the client is the one that's going to be upset and paying the bill for the inefficiency and the lack of coordination. So how about we be proactive and get all these people who are serving the family together. And so those, those advisors that really recognize the importance of that team building and can explain to the client, yeah, it is important to do. That's number one. You know, other advisors recognize and going back to your other question what they're doing wrong and to the comment that one advisor made, don't you know who I am? Statistics can prov and help you really understand a lot of things. And with respect to wealth managers, there's a statistic out there that 85% of next gen leave their parents advisor and go to their own advisor, go to a contemporary someone they know. And why is that one advisors just talk about performance, performance, performance, performance. I'll get you this return. Here's your tax optimization. We'll get you. And you know what we're doing. The family members on the golf course are talking to their buddy and they say look what my advisor just did. Guess what their buddy is going to say to them. Well, my advisor did better. So all about performance and performance is the only part of your conversation. You're going to begin falling into that 85%. The other two things that advisors do wrong in that category is that they need to recognize that technology is swooping in and our jobs as advisors to be that non AI person, right. To not have technology on the trading floor is taking over a lot of the tasks. So if you're not making yourself more unique and valuable to the family, technology is going to take it over. And last, there's fee compression. Every advisor knows that. And so if you're charging your clients the same or try to even get any compensation and you're not providing value beyond the performance again, you're going to fall to that 85% statistic.
B
You know, it's the fee compression thing. I just interviewed Michael Kitsis that people can go back and listen to that show. He says he's not seeing so much fee compression as value. Value inflation he called it. Right. And that's kind of what you're talking about, right? It's like you've got to make yourself more valuable. And if you just make the conversation about the numbers, that's all you're giving them to rate the relationship, if you will, to judge the relationship you got to give them more, you got to give them more value. And that's usually what the AI algorithms can't give, at least not yet. Rich, what are some of the common challenges that families face when establishing or operating a family office? And how can advisors assist in overcoming them? So other than finding the right advisors to putting them in place, and maybe that is one of the challenges that the advisors can help with the team theme you mentioned, but anything else come to mind?
C
Yeah, so when thinking about that, there's you know, two types of family offices really. Those are existing ones and those that are to be formed. I'm not sure which is more, but clients either have their existing family office and they're trying to make sure it's sustainable or families who are thinking about forming them. And I can't tell you how many families rush into things too quickly. So. But let me give you, I think three kind of points to think about. One is what's the plan like? If you look at what made these families successful in business, usually they had some sort of business plan, strategic plan, some sort of plan of where they knew this business was going to go. Families of wealth often look at their family office and have a knee jerk reaction to either form one because they've had recent liquidity, a recent large inheritance, something like that, or the family existing family office has just been going along but no one's really stopped to think what's our strategic plan? So one is what's the purpose of this? What's the North Star? Are the clients who the family represent, are they aligned and have the same purpose? And so one, creating a plan to budget our family offices just a void and a in a dark hole, a sinking fund to keep supporting the family. In some cases that can be okay. But really, I mean coming up with a budget and really having clarity amongst the stakeholders amongst the family, the family leadership, the next gen, say is our family office a cost center? Is it a revenue generator? Is it a break even? Because that will help. Then you determine the third thing which is extremely important and most families fail in and that's finding the right people to actually lead and execute the family office. Many times families will just find a trusted advisor who they really trust and like who knows the family history. But that person may not be equipped to carry out the strategic plan and do it in the cost efficient way is what the family really wants. So oftentimes they need to find the right person. Not just someone who they trust and know, but someone who can actually have the experience and the skill set to execute on it.
B
Is that right person, someone potentially you, I mean, some. And someone like you who works with family offices.
C
Well, so I serve as an outsourced family office advisor, so I'm not captive to a family.
B
I see you're talking about inside the family, the person that kind of managed the office, if you will.
C
It depends. There's a continuum of family offices and people also get that kind of confused. So on what most people think about when they think family office, they're thinking single family office. And single family office is on the continuum, the farthest to one side, where almost all services are provided internally to the family and the family members. On the other end of the continuum is what we could maybe call a virtual family office. Those that really don't want to have a physical space, those that really don't need employees. The wealth is significant, but the family really enjoys outsourcing everything to its trusted advisors and they quarterback it from there. And then there's all sorts of, you know, there's embedded family office. Those that are inside an operating company, an operating business of the family, that they're performing dual services, they're performing services for the operating company and they're also performing services to the family. And there's a multifamily office, as we all know, which are, you know, larger groups of non related members of family that are together to achieve a certain financial usual outcome. And so depending on that, you have to find the right person or people to operate and execute. After all, at the end of the day, a family office is there to serve people. And yet the number one mistake family offices make, not getting the right people who understand the family culture, have the right expertise, have the right servant leader mindset, have a multidisciplinary skill set. Or as Linda Mack of Mac International coined it, an expert generalist. Right. You need an expert generalist to play that role many times.
B
Yeah, yeah, makes sense. You know, the word that keeps coming up in my head as you're describing all these things is the word expectations and matching expectations and clear expectations. Probably a pretty critical, ongoing theme in all of this. Would you agree, Bill?
C
It's so important, it's so critical, it's so fundamental. That's the name of my business because it is based on missed expectations. Because xylogenesis, which is the name of my firm, is really a process. If you've ever cut a tree in half and you see tree rings, the process of tree ring creation is xylogenesis. So I often give families three different cutouts of tree rings, one is like this perfect 300 year old tree where the circles are perfect, aligned, concentric, not cracked. To the opposite end of the spectrum, I show a large tree that was cut in half. And it's cracked, it's warped, it's burned out. The tree rings are, are not, not even close to circular catty wampus. Right. And then there's one in the middle that's somewhere in between the first one and the third one. And so I often ask families as an intake, when we're first getting together, if you could be a tree rank like into the future, not who have you been, not who are you today. But family offices are designed to look dynastically into the future. So who do you want to be into the future? And families often will get not even know themselves. I've sat with a husband and wife. He picked one tree ring, totally out of character of who he was. He was a former accountant, cpa, buttoned up, hair, perfect, always doing everything by the book. His wife was the opposite. She was so energetic, enthusiastic, just full of life. He picked the one that was cracked, which she picked the one that was perfectly concentric. And so in asking them like, why did you pick this? It turned out they didn't even know this about themselves. They didn't know about each other. And so it goes back to alignment. And alignment is about those expectations about being able to put into place what your goals are into the future. And families miss that all the time.
B
What you described, I think is, is, is what you call the xylogenesis effect. Correct?
C
Correct.
B
And, and I can just see you bringing in what, three, three big chunks of wood or these photographs. What, how do you, how do you communicate this concept?
C
So, so I've got, I've got one slide that's got three different pictures.
B
Gotcha. Okay, here comes Rich shifting a little here. Talk about issues such as, you know, what you've labeled as toxic loyalty and nepotism in family offices. You know, just mentioning those words, we know, you know, that's a recipe for disaster. Speak on that a little bit.
C
Sure. So, so if we know family offices are designed to serve the family and we're hiring people who are servant leader, mindset, what happens over time? And if we're talking about a multi generational family, what also happens is not only multi generational the family, it often becomes multi generational employees in the family office or family business. And it also becomes multi generational outside advisors to the family. And what happens over time when you look at that and so loyalty is one thing that we all strive for and to achieve, whether it's in your personal relationships, in your business relationships, loyalty is a really nice thing to, and a goal to have. In fact, you know, there's all these studies and surveys on how to capture market share and market share is captured due to brand loyalty. So loyalty isn't a negative thing. And nepotism also is not a negative thing. It can be perceived as negative and if it's not implemented right, it can be. But if, if you're an employee, a non family employee, if you're a advisor to families, if you're a bank who loans money to family, or you really want nepotism to happen, because nepotism in the right sense is a continuity plan. So what happens though if loyalty goes bad? If nepotism goes bad? Well, there's three different levels where toxic loyalty really comes into play. Because now you're talking about dynastic firms, firms that have been around for multiple generations or who they aspire to be around for multiple generations. So you build this cult of the personality, the cult of the family leader, who are really dynamic, super successful, and they devote often much of their energy to their people to help support them. It's a really symbiotic, beautiful thing. But what happens when taken to an extreme? Family members at one level never want to challenge the family leadership because they control the estate plan, they control the wealth, they control the future destiny of your employment or your path in your career. So often times, and where the, where the leadership doesn't recognize that maybe they're being too top down, they're maybe being slightly or very extreme, narcissistic, right? They're very controlling, dominating. They're not letting the next voice heard. So what happens at the family level? The family members kind of check out. They just end up saying, I agree. And apathy builds in and extreme situations. This leads to toxic loyalty in the family amongst family members. You take it to the next level, which is the employees, same thing happens. The employees of multi generational family enterprises would jump in front of a bullet for a family member. They often care so much about the family, the family's taking care of them. It's a beautiful thing. But what happens? Well, if you say that to the principal or the family, you're doing something wrong or you're about to drive off the cliff. Stop, don't do that. That can often be perceived as insubordination. It can often be perceived as lack of loyalty. Like, why are you challenging me? We're really trying to do the good thing. And so then from a selfish perspective, the inside employee says, you know what, I really care about the family. It's their decision. They're probably not going to listen to me anyway. And you know what, this is a good gig. I really like what I do. And you know what, I have a child who might be in this business too, or a brother in some other division, some other company doing something. And so the employees and non family employees, then just like sometimes the family members will check out, they do. And they allow bad habits and bad things to happen. And then the third level are the trusted advisors. Many of the people listen to this podcast, they have that same thing. How far do I push, how far do I speak truth to power as we keep talking about, if I do, I could jeopardize the account. And sometimes in the, in the big advisor organizations, it's not even the main partner, the relationship partner that has the day to day function with the family. It's some junior low level person who wants to be that higher level person. And they see the family's gonna have a train wreck and they don't want to speak up for fear of them losing the account or rooting their career. So you take all this together and that's where toxic loyalty comes in. And so you really have to set up guardrails. Great governance can really help solve many of these problems.
B
Yeah, so it's the word expectations, as I mentioned, is a piece of that. And then I guess setting up, maybe even setting up the expectation and permission to speak up. Right. To make sure that that's worked into the, the culture that if, you know, as the advisor could say this, anybody on the team could say, if I see something that seems amiss, you know, do I have your permission to point that out? I'll be nice, I'll be gentle, and it's my job. Even if you may not want to hear that at some point in time. Right. Would you say that that's kind of part of the equation of speaking truth to power is kind of gaining that permission on the front end and the expectation on the front end. So then when it comes up, well, we already know that the path is open to be able to do that. Does that make sense?
C
It totally makes sense. And it's easier to do on the front end when you're getting clients?
B
Yes, exactly. Set it up at the beginning and then when the time comes, it could be a month, it could be a year, it could be five years and but remember that time we talked about when I see something that's a miss. You said it'd be okay to bring it up. Well, yeah. Well, this is one of those times, right? It's just everything gets easier. Yeah, that's been my experience. Anyway. Hey, this is great, Rich. My featured guest, Rich Wolkowitz, founder of Xylogenesis Family Office Advisory. You can find Rich Wolkowitz W O L K O W I T Z on LinkedIn and all these links will be in the show notes if you want to reach out to Rich to learn more about his services and just connect in general. He's a nice guy. He loves. He's got a servant's heart. Rich has served as a family Advisor for over 25 years, as we know now, in different capacities. I just want to thank you for your giving nature and for your willingness to to be on this podcast and share your ideas with our listeners. Thank you.
C
Well, thanks, Bill. It's great. And again, congratulations on the book. I know it'll be widely successful.
B
Yeah, I'm holding it up right now. The Hidden Heist TheHiddenHeist.com Get a copy for yourself. You'll enjoy the story and the audio. The audiobook is great because we hired a professional fiction book reader. You know the guy or gal you listen to on Simon and Schuster and Random House Audio and he brought all the characters to life because all the characters in the book represent a different mistaken belief or a perspective on money. And Alton Beckett, the hero of the story, is a financial advisor. So all of you will be able to identify with Alden who's kind of managing that conversation while the bumbly robbers are trying to figure out how to get past SWAT and all that nonsense. So look to you, the listener of the podcast, couple of quick favors. Please leave a five star review on the platform. You're listening to the show. Not all platforms have the place for five star reviews, but if yours does that, I'd be grateful. And you know what other advisors in your orbit you think should listen to this episode? Don't keep it a secret. Spread the wealth. This episode of Top Advisor podcast is sponsored by Ironclad Family who brings you Ivault X, a financial advisor enablement tool focused on upping your game as a holistic advisor. Simply go to holistic advisor guide.com I invite you to join me@coachcates.com if you you're part of an organization brings in speakers, coaches. I love to see if I can be a resource for you. Love doing in person presentations virtual go to Bill Kates speaking.com Bill Kates speaking.com and finally, this is Bill Cates reminding you that ideas do not make you more successful. Only acting on those ideas will bring you the success you desire. Thanks for stopping by.
A
Thank you for listening to the Top Advisor podcast brought to you by Proud Mouse Pot Rocket Academy. I encourage you to Visit my website, referralcoach.com for links to my books, online courses, and to register for the Katz Academy.
Host: Bill Cates
Guest: Rich Wolkowitz, Attorney, Family Office Advisor, Founder of Xylogenesis
Release Date: November 5, 2025
This episode explores what it takes to become the “first-call advisor” for ultra-high-net-worth families and family offices. Bill Cates hosts Rich Wolkowitz, a multi-generational family member, attorney, and founder of Xylogenesis. Rich shares insights drawn from his experience in law, the White House, running his family enterprise, and serving as an external CEO and consultant for major family offices. Listeners gain actionable advice on building trust, creating meaningful relationships, and serving families across generations.
“I was asked to speak truth to power and we got results as a result of that...always speak the truth.” — Rich Wolkowitz [04:35]
“There’s the quantitative...and then there’s the qualitative...we often forget about our heart.” — Rich Wolkowitz [09:35]
“You want to position yourself to be that first call. And so I help work with advisors of all types to really understand how to have that breakthrough…” — Rich Wolkowitz [11:40]
“Your advice...is always on what's good for me instead [of] what's good for the client. And clients eventually see through that.” — Rich Wolkowitz [14:06]
“85% of next gen leave their parents’ advisor...because advisors just talk about performance.” — Rich Wolkowitz [18:50]
“If you’re charging...and you’re not providing value beyond the performance...you’re going to fall to that 85% statistic.” — Rich Wolkowitz [19:40]
“At the end of the day, a family office is there to serve people. And yet the number one mistake family offices make: not getting the right people who understand the family culture...” — Rich Wolkowitz [24:33]
“How far do I push, how far do I speak truth to power...I could jeopardize the account.” — Rich Wolkowitz [31:33]
“It's easier to do on the front end when you're getting clients...” — Rich Wolkowitz [33:30]
The conversation is candid, practical, and laden with real-world examples. Rich Wolkowitz communicates with humility, emphasizing the need for self-awareness, courage, and empathy among advisors. Bill Cates reinforces the importance of relational focus and encourages listeners to rethink how they can bring unique, lasting value to high-net-worth and multigenerational families.
Connect with Rich Wolkowitz:
Search for Rich Wolkowitz (W-O-L-K-O-W-I-T-Z) on LinkedIn or see the show notes for links.
Learn More About Xylogenesis: The firm and its metaphor for family alignment described at [25:39].
(Note: Intro, ad reads, book promo, outros, and sponsor plugs have been omitted for clarity.)