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This is Paige desorbo from Gigli Squad. Boost Mobile gives you the same network coverage, speed and service you're used to, just at a more affordable price. Why pay more if you don't have to? Offering reliable nationwide coverage backed by a 30 day money back guarantee. Love your service or get your money back, no questions asked. Visit your nearest Boost Mobile store or head to boostmobile.com to learn more. After 30 gigabytes, customers may experience slower speeds. Customers who cancel within 30 days of activation will have Boost service fees refunded, refunded activation fees if applicable, and phone payments will not be refunded. Did I talk too much? Can't I just let it go? Take a breath. You're not alone. Counseling helps you sort through the noise with qualified professionals. Get matched with a therapist online based on your unique needs and get help with everyday struggles like anxiety or managing tough emotions. Visit betterhelp.com randompodcast for 10% off your first month of online therapy and let life feel better. Old school Security kicks in after the break in Too late Simplisafe rewinds the story Stopping crime before it starts Active Guard Outdoor Protection uses AI powered cameras to detect intruders, alert live monitoring agents, and can deter intruders before they reach your door. It's proactive protection plus a 60 day money back guarantee and no contracts. To get 60% off your new system, go to SimpliSafe.com podcast that's SimpliSafe.com podcast. There's no safe like Simplisafe. Hi, this is Zibby Owens and you're listening to Totally Booked with Zibby formerly Moms don't have Time to Read Books in my daily show, I interview today's latest best selling, buzziest or underrated authors and story creators whose work I think is worth your time. As a bookstore owner, publisher, author and obviously podcaster, I get a comprehensive look at everything that's coming out and spend my time curating the best books so you don't have to stay in the know. Get insider insights and connect with guests like I do every single day. For more information go to zibbymedia.com and follow me on Instagram. Ibbeowensk Lola Akanmade Akarstrom is the author of Bitter a novel. Nigerian American Lola is an award winning travel writer, speaker, photographer and author of the international bestseller In Every Mirror. She's Black and Everything Is Not Enough. She was actually on this podcast for Every Mirror She's Black and is now back. She is based in Stockholm. Welcome Lola. Welcome back. I'M totally booked. I'm so excited to be talking to you about Bitter Honey. Congratulations.
B
Thank you. Thank you.
A
Amazing. Tell listeners what Bitter Honey is about.
B
So Bitter Honey is the story about mothers and daughters and the secrets that lie between them. So it follows a mom who moved from Gambia to Sweden in the 70s and also follows her daughters in the early 2000s. So it's kind of a dual timeline, and it's. If you've been broken about by secrets, how can you get back together, rebuild that relationship? So really, it's a story about mothers.
A
And daughters and kind of fathers just throwing that out there.
B
Exactly. And deadbeat fathers.
A
I mean, I feel like it's not totally giving it away because, you know, we have an unexpected visitor quite early in the narrative which informs the rest of it. But they're all the secrets in their family just start oozing out in the beginning and affect everything because your whole identity is wrapped up in things like what your parents tell you about who you are, and how do you process when those are different? Where did this idea come from?
B
You know, my first two novels, these characters, Nancy and Tina, actually was really side characters in those books. So even though this is totally standalone, there were side characters. And one of the characters said, my mom moved and met my dad, who was a professor. And all of this is not giving anything away. You find out on, like, page two. And so I knew I had to write that story, and so I started digging deeper. And I'm also, you know, a mom raising a mixed kid in Sweden. So just a lot of those questions that I also naturally have, as well as, you know, going through a divorce while I was writing the book. So it really was a book about if life doesn't go the way you planned, if life derails you, how can you still pick up the pieces and make something still beautiful worth living? Right? And so that's kind of how.
A
How can you. What's the answer to that?
B
You know, you have to, first of all, give yourself grace, give yourself enough time to grief that process, and then pick up the best pieces you can if it's, you know, repairing our relationships, taking care of yourself, knowing that even if life derails you, you know, you can still find joy. And a friend of mine said, it's like being in a box. Sometimes we can't break out of that box. So we can at least make that box beautiful. Right? So we can at least, you know, decorate it and make it our own, even though life has put us in that box.
A
So interesting. So One of the storylines delves into addiction, loss, love, all of that. Talk a little bit about. About that and. And what we should take away.
B
No, absolutely. One thing I wanted to do with this book was be very honest, you know, in terms of the identity issues people are dealing with. And if they don't, you know, go to therapy or get the resources they need, that is why they can then maybe fall into habits that. That doesn't serve them in the long run. And so that was what I wanted to talk about, is how we can pass on generational trauma, you know, from our parents onto kids, and parents thinking they are doing the right thing, actually affect the kids negatively.
A
Very interesting. And what about fame? Because your protagonist is a performer and in the public eye and has to deal with all of her stuff very publicly. In fact, in the beginning, it works for her favor to her favor when she has a very authentic performance after a shocking event. But throughout the book, she has to wrestle with who she is publicly, who she is, she is privately, how to stuff down the stuff so she can perform and do what she does. And is that important to her overall? Anyway, Talk a little bit about that.
B
No, I wanted to talk about fame in the way that if you aren't grounded before fame arrives at your door, it can sweep you away. And so with Tina, I wanted to show that she still hadn't had a great sense of self yet she was still discovering who she was. And so it was easy for theme to come in and derail her. And that was kind of what I wanted to show with that character, is that even if we're all. If we all think we are ready for it, if we are not grounded, truly grounded in our values and the things that are important to us, you know, then we can easily get swept off.
A
Do you feel like you are grounded in your values?
B
Yes, I do. You know, I am quite grounded because I know, because I'm a woman of fate as well. So I know that life is much bigger than what I see. And so at least that gives me some grounding to say, you know what? There's something much bigger than myself.
A
I love that. That's great.
B
How.
A
How did you include doses of creativity in your day while going through your divorce, while doing all of the other stuff, like, how do you carve out the time and space and is. Or do you find it easy to sort of jump back and forth?
B
You know, I think it all started with Grace, right? Saying, you know what? I don't have to have it all figured out. I'm not the first person going through this, you know, leaning on people that have gone through similar and then realizing that just take it one day at a time. You know, if. If I look at, okay, what's. What do I have to do next month? That just brings unnecessary anxiety. So I say, you know, what. What do I need to do to get today to feel grounded? How do my kids feel today? Do they feel safe and loved and, you know, and so that's what I do. And then in terms of the creativity, this book was actually a cathartic process for me. It adds nothing to do with my divorce. The characters are not, you know, anywhere related to. To my own situation. But what was kind of similar was the fact that if life derails you, right? So if nobody goes into marriage wanting to get divorced, but if life does have other plans for you, how can you still pick up yourself, dust off yourself, and still show up and then create something, you know, still worth celebrating? You know, and so that was kind of our approach, this book.
A
So how long did it take to write?
B
So this book? I've been writing this in bits and pieces for about two years, you know, so kind of when the whole process started. And so I finished it over a year ago in January, so I'll say about two years, you know, in bits and pieces, writing when the spirit moved me and. And feeling when there was a flow of creativity. So.
A
And in the meantime, Jeanette McCurdy picked one of your last books as a book club pick, which is so huge. Tell me about that experience.
B
No, that was incredible. And just to have my endorsement was, you know, a big honor. And I think it just speaks to just writing the book you really want to write. And don't worry about how it's going to land. Right. Those that connect with it will find it. Those that feel seen through the stories, through the narratives will gravitate towards it. And I think that was what happened with the last book. Everything is Not Enough is just. It was raw, it was very messy. There was no one character you could root for which shows the human condition in the fact that we are all just trying to figure life out, you know, and we're. And hopefully we give each other grace, you know, as we're doing that.
A
Amazing. And then since this book, you have a novella that has come out. Talk about that.
B
Yes. So the novella is called Johan, and that novella is tied to the previous two books. Is the main character, like, I'll say the white dude character who connects all three black women and a lot of readers Were like, we want to get into his head because you, without giving anything away, he is a quieter, problematic character in those books. And so I said, you know what, since you are asking, I'm going to write this short novella and give you a behind the scenes of this guy because he is very complex. He has. He comes from quite an interesting family. And so I wanted the readers to have something to at least be able to reference why he is the way he is as an adult. So I'm really proud of that novella. It actually took me a week to write.
A
Wow.
B
Yeah. And so. Yeah.
A
But it's called Johan, how many words is that? Or how long is it?
B
It's about 27,000 words in one week. Yeah. Yeah. Whoa. See? Yes. So my writing process is quite different. I have to know the characters really well before I write. So because I know Johann really well, it was easy for me to write. And so when I go into any writing project, I actually spend months thinking about the characters in my head, making them real people in my head. So now when it's time to actually write their stories, it comes real quickly. And so that was the thing with Johann is I know him so well based on the other two books, you know, and so it was easy to just write a story. Was just wow.
A
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B
So I am working on a new novel and I'm so excited about it. I don't want to jinx it. No, but you know, Bitter Honey, you know, after the book tour, I'm going to keep writing this new novel. All I can say is the main protagonist is a travel writer like myself. So that. That should be fun. And. And yeah, you know, and of course, outside of writing, I'm a photographer, so I do lots of different things around storytelling, visual storytelling. So. But that's what I'm working on in terms of the next book.
A
Amazing. And where is someplace you've been travel writing that you highly recommend?
B
Oh, my goodness. I mean there are so many. You know, I always say it's usually experiences and moments that you remember, but anywhere from like Uzbekistan and Mongolia to Greenland, you know, and obviously in Nigeria, where my roots are. But Croatia I keep going back to. I've been there about 15 times and that's where I write. Yeah, I know. I don't know why I think there's something about the Dalmatian coast, but I. I like to go back there to write. So I. I wrote to Johan in a week in Croatia. And my books, when I need to kind of keep moving, I go there. And I think it's just being by the sea, you know, and getting just that beautiful energy that really helps me. So I will highly recommend Croatia, but so many different places based on what you're really looking for.
A
So if I. If I plan a trip to Croatia after this conversation, what should I Google? Which town? Which location?
B
Really lovely. But I would highly recommend the island of Ava.
A
Ava.
B
It's H V A R. Okay. Hvr. Yeah.
A
Okay.
B
And I completely in touch with a wonderful. Know they did a company is called Tailored Croatia. So just amazing, really tailored boutique experiences. But that island is quite special. And of course there's at least 1,200 other islands.
A
Right.
B
As well, so. But that one is quite special. And yeah, of course people go to Dubrovnik, but yeah, that's my hat.
A
Okay, good to know. And tell me about new photography project you're proud of.
B
Absolutely. So right now I'm working on a lovely project. It's called Afro Suede. And it's, you know, it. It's like a portrait series that's done in a studio against either a blue or a yellow background. And it's an integration Visual storytelling project. Right. Because when people think about the Nordics or Sweden, they always still have one image, you know, blonde, blue eyes, that's it. But then I think about my kids who are also born here. Right. They still have some roots in Africa because of me. There are lots of Afro Swedes. The Afro Swedish history is actually quite long. And so with this project, I celebrate what it means to have multiple cultural identities. I can be African, but I can also be Swedish. Right. And so it's a really lovely, beautiful visual project that combines me wearing, like, my subjects, wearing some attire from their homelands, you know, their roots as well as Swedish items. So it blends, you know, so I could be wearing like, you know, a Nigerian egg tie, wearing over a Swedish traditional vest, just showing. Visually showing that integration of cultures.
A
So, wow, super creative. Were you this creative as a kid?
B
You know, I've always been a creative person, you know, and I think when I was younger, I used to write a lot of short stories, and I used to write them quickly. Maybe that was why I wrote the other book quickly. But. And I used to draw a lot, so I. So I'm definitely a creative person. But when I moved to the U.S. i started in it so I went to college and studied information systems. I worked as a programmer for many years. And, you know, we always said that you go study what your parents are willing to pay for, you know, return on investment. Right. So I did that for many years. But just the creativity pulled me back to. And that's how I kind of got into travel writing and photography and. Yeah. But yes, I've always loved telling stories. And the platform I use, I say is irrelevant. It's what the story I'm trying to tell demands. So if I. If I want to tell a story about integration, maybe just writing about it is tiring. Maybe actually just visually show it through photography, or if I want to talk about very difficult subjects, maybe through fiction, where people can feel like they are in the shoes of these characters. So that's kind of how I approach my storytelling and my creativity.
A
Amazing. By the way, as we were talking about this, I think one of your kids snuck around. That was my favorite part of the interview. Just the little glimpses. That was amazing. My kids are so, so not subtle. They would just, like, walk right in. So congrats.
B
Right now. They're actually both looking at me right now.
A
Oh, my gosh.
B
One just once opened a bag of chips, so I had to put myself on mute.
A
Oh, that's so funny. Oh, my gosh. Mom. Get it all done. That's just how it goes. I love it.
B
Exactly.
A
Amazing. Okay, last question. What are you reading now or what's something you've read lately aside from your own amazing work that you would recommend?
B
Absolutely. I'm so I'm currently reading a book called Friends and Lovers and I think it's by Charlene. I'm going to be. I'm so sorry Chalene, but no, it's absolutely lovely. I'm just getting in, you know, sucked in, into that. And before that I read All Fours and, and I've got like a lot of books kind of on the pile but I'm really, you know, trying to read a lot more kind of contemporary black writers in the diaspora because they're writing kind of fresh, interesting books that are not stereotypical. Right. So what is it like to be a 40 year old black woman who is messy and allowed to make mistakes in society, you know, even if society holds us to a double standard. So those kind of books are the books I'm. I'm drawn to. So, so that's what I'm reading right now is Friends and Lovers by Shirlene.
A
Amazing. Okay, I promise. Last question. What advice would you have for aspiring authors?
B
The advice I have is don't worry about who is going to read your book. Just write the book that you need to write. My first book was very, it took over 70 rejections and we just stopped counting. Right. To get that book published in every Mauritius black because it was different and it was just raw and honest. And by going through that process now I can write whatever book I want to write. And so for my advice for aspiring authors is don't worry if you write for just the one person. Just write the story you're meant to write. Don't worry about the tone. Write what your soul wants to write. Once you put it down, that's when we have editors and people that can guide. But get that story out the way it wants to be told and don't start censoring yourself thinking about what others will think.
A
Love that. Excellent advice. All right, good luck with your kids. Thank you so much. You know, you'll probably have written another book by like, you know, tomorrow. Tomorrow you shamed the rest of us with your productivity. So thank you so much for coming back on Lola. I appreciate it.
B
Thank you Zevi. Okay, great see you again. Great to see you again.
A
Take care.
B
Bye bye.
A
Thank you for listening to Totally Booked with Zibby. Formerly Moms don't have time to read Books. If you loved the show, Tell a friend, leave a review. Follow me on Instagram Ibby Owens and Spread the Word. Thanks so much. Oh, and buy the books. If you love to travel, Capital One has a rewards credit card that's perfect for you. With the Capital One Venture X card, you earn unlimited double miles on everything you buy. Plus you get premium benefits at a collection of luxury hotels when you book on Capital One Travel. And with Venture X, you get access to over 1,000 airport lounges worldwide. Open up a world of travel possibilities with a Capital One Venture X card. What's in your wallet? Terms apply. Lounge access is subject to change. See capitalone.com for details. Why Choose a Sleep Number Smart Bed Can I make my site softer? Can I make my site firmer? Can we sleep cooler? Sleep number does that cools up to eight times faster and lets you choose your ideal comfort on either side your Sleep number setting. Enjoy personalized comfort for better sleep night after night. It's our Black Friday sale recharged this season with a bundle of cozy soothing comfort. Now only $17.99 for our C2 mattress and base plus free premium delivery price is higher in Alaska and Hawaii. Check it out at a Sleep number store or sleep number.com today. You know Hannah and I love a good bedrotting session, reality TV snacks nearby and now I've leveled up with my self care game with this Shark Beauty Cryoglow, the number one skincare facial device in the us. Wait, I'm obsessed with it. I've had it for a while actually and it's the only mask that combines high energy LEDs, infrared and under eye cooling. I I really need this because nothing wakes me up in the morning. You could do four treatments in one better aging, skin clearing, skin sustain and my favorite the under eye revive with Insta Chill Cold Tech. You put it on and it just feels so good under your eyes. Like I actually feel like I got eight hours of sleep. It's truly like a luxury spa moment while you're literally horizontal. It's perfect for post workout Sunday scaries or when you just want to glow while rotting. To treat yourself to the number one LED beauty mask this holiday season, go to SharkNinja.com and use promo code Giggly Squad for 10% off off your CryoGLOW. That's SharkNinja.com and use Promo code Giggly Squad for 10 percent off your CryoGLOW.
Totally Booked with Zibby
Host: Zibby Owens
Guest: Lolá Ákínmádé Åkerström
Episode: "BITTER HONEY"
Release Date: November 6, 2025
In this engaging episode, Zibby Owens welcomes back Lolá Ákínmádé Åkerström—award-winning author, travel writer, and photographer—to discuss her newest novel, Bitter Honey. The conversation delves into the novel’s exploration of mother-daughter relationships, family secrets, generational trauma, fame, and personal healing. Lolá also reflects on her own creative process, balancing life changes and art, and the universality of resilience. Insights into her travel writing, visual storytelling, recent projects, and advice for aspiring authors round out this rich and heartfelt episode.
[02:54–03:59]
Bitter Honey centers on the intricate bonds between mothers and daughters, the secrets they keep, and the paths to healing when relationships are fractured.
“It’s a story about mothers and daughters and the secrets that lie between them… if you’ve been broken about by secrets, how can you get back together, rebuild that relationship?”
— Lolá Ákínmádé Åkerström [02:57]
The story also touches on fathers, specifically “deadbeat fathers,” and their impact on identity.
[03:59–04:51]
Characters Nancy and Tina appeared as side characters in Lolá’s previous novels but demanded a deeper exploration.
Lolá’s personal experiences—raising a mixed child in Sweden, navigating divorce—shaped her understanding of resilience and finding joy amid life’s derailments.
“It really was a book about if life doesn’t go the way you planned, if life derails you, how can you still pick up the pieces and make something still beautiful worth living?”
— Lolá [04:30]
[05:29–06:18]
The book confronts issues like addiction, loss, and love, focusing on generational trauma.
Lolá stresses honesty in portraying how lack of resources or therapy can lead to destructive patterns.
“That was what I wanted to talk about, is how we can pass on generational trauma… parents thinking they are doing the right thing, actually affect the kids negatively.”
— Lolá [06:11]
[06:18–07:29]
Protagonist Tina grapples with being in the public eye, performing authentically while managing private turmoil.
The narrative cautions that fame, without prior grounding, can be destabilizing.
“If you aren’t grounded before fame arrives at your door, it can sweep you away.”
— Lolá [06:53]
[07:29–07:51]
Zibby inquires about Lolá’s own sense of grounding.
Lolá attributes her grounding to her faith and belief in something greater than herself.
“I am quite grounded because I know, because I’m a woman of faith as well. So I know that life is much bigger than what I see.”
— Lolá [07:32]
[07:54–09:20]
Lolá highlights the importance of grace and taking things day by day during her divorce.
Writing Bitter Honey was a cathartic process, detached from but informed by her personal circumstances.
“If life does have other plans for you, how can you still pick up yourself, dust off yourself, and still show up and then create something, you know, still worth celebrating?”
— Lolá [08:56]
[09:20–09:42]
The book took about two years to write, in “bits and pieces,” as inspiration allowed.
“…writing when the spirit moved me and… when there was a flow of creativity.”
— Lolá [09:35]
[09:42–11:26]
Discusses Everything Is Not Enough being selected as a Jeanette McCurdy Book Club pick, and the importance of writing authentically.
Mentions a new novella, Johan, which was written in just a week by deeply understanding the character.
“When I go into any writing project, I actually spend months thinking about the characters in my head… so now when it’s time to actually write their stories, it comes real quickly.”
— Lolá [11:16]
[16:11–16:44]
[16:49–18:23]
Croatia, especially the island of Hvar, is Lolá’s writing sanctuary; she admires its beauty and energy by the sea.
Reflects on international experiences from Nigeria to Mongolia.
“Croatia I keep going back to. I’ve been there about 15 times and that’s where I write… there’s something about the Dalmatian coast.”
— Lolá [17:12]
[18:29–19:44]
Afro Suede is a portrait series celebrating multicultural identities in the Nordics, visually combining African and Swedish cultural elements.
“With this project, I celebrate what it means to have multiple cultural identities. I can be African, but I can also be Swedish.”
— Lolá [19:10]
[19:49–21:09]
Lolá’s creativity dates back to childhood, though she first worked in IT before returning to storytelling through writing and photography.
“The platform I use, I say, is irrelevant. It’s what the story I’m trying to tell demands.”
— Lolá [20:52]
[21:09–21:44]
A candid moment as her children quietly move in the background, highlighting the reality of balancing parenting and creativity.
“Mom. Get it all done. That’s just how it goes.”
— Zibby [21:36]
[21:44–22:47]
Currently reading Friends and Lovers by Shirlene; recently read All Fours.
Drawn to contemporary Black writers in the diaspora, looking for fresh, non-stereotypical depictions.
“…books that are not stereotypical. Right. So what is it like to be a 40 year old Black woman who is messy and allowed to make mistakes in society… so those kind of books are the books I'm drawn to.”
— Lolá [22:22]
[22:52–23:43]
Encourages writers to focus on telling the story they are moved to tell, regardless of outside expectations or potential reception.
“Don’t worry about who is going to read your book. Just write the book that you need to write… Write what your soul wants to write.”
— Lolá [23:04]
This episode offers a rich, relatable conversation between two creative women reflecting on the complexities of family, identity, healing, and creative work. Lolá Ákínmádé Åkerström’s warmth and candor shine through as she shares personal and artistic insights, making this a must-listen for readers, writers, and anyone curious about the stories behind compelling contemporary fiction.