Episode Summary: Sonja Walgar Discusses Lion on Totally Booked with Zibby
Podcast Information:
- Title: Totally Booked with Zibby
- Host: Zibby Owens
- Episode: Sonja Walgar, Lion
- Release Date: March 27, 2025
Introduction
In this heartfelt episode of Totally Booked with Zibby, host Zibby Owens welcomes Sonja Walgar, a British-American actress, writer, and podcaster, best known for her roles in the ABC series Lost and Apple TV's For All Mankind. Sonja is here to discuss her debut novel, Lion, an autobiographical work that delves into her complex relationship with her father. With her extensive background in literature from Christ Church College at the University of Oxford and her passion for storytelling, Sonja brings profound insights into the crafting of her deeply personal narrative.
About Sonja Walgar and Lion
Sonja Walgar introduces her novel as an autofiction—a blend of autobiography and fiction—to explore her father's multifaceted personality and his profound impact on her life. She explains:
“It’s a story about my dad who was a very charismatic, extraordinary guy... He was a Formula One racing car driver, a polo player, a serial lover of women, a cocaine addict, he went to jail, he took up skydiving...”
— Sonja Walgar [04:22]
Sonja emphasizes that while Lion is rooted in real experiences, it employs fictional elements to capture the essence of her memories and emotions, allowing her the creative freedom to flesh out characters and events beyond her recollections.
Understanding Autofiction
The discussion delves into the concept of autofiction, a genre Sonja admits she is not fond of terming her work. She clarifies:
“It’s a work of fiction in which everything happened is my line on this book... it's a crystallizing and a distilling down to the essence of things.”
— Sonja Walgar [06:56]
Zibby Owens aptly summarizes the nature of Lion by comparing it to a historical novel about Sonja's own life:
“Something like that in the book. Yes. It's about your dad. Right. But it is so much more about you and your relationship to him...”
— Sonja Walgar [07:34]
This approach allows Sonja to intertwine her personal growth and experiences with her father's dynamic character, offering readers a nuanced portrayal of their relationship.
Themes and Insights from Lion
Sonja explores several profound themes in her book:
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Complex Fatherhood: Sonja portrays her father as a charismatic yet deeply flawed individual. His adventurous spirit and personal struggles, including addiction and infidelity, create a tumultuous environment for Sonja and her siblings.
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Memory and Legacy: With her father's sudden passing when her children were young, Sonja felt an urgent need to document his life to preserve his memory:
“I have the most terrible memory. So I thought, God, if I don't write them down, I really won't remember them.”
— Sonja Walgar [04:22] -
Identity and Parenting: Sonja reflects on how her father's behavior has influenced her own parenting style, striving to balance stability with flexibility:
“What does it mean to have been this man's daughter? In what way has this man informed who I am, how I parent, what the choices I make?”
— Sonja Walgar [08:40] -
Resilience in Adversity: The episode touches upon Sonja's recent personal challenges, such as losing her home in fires, and how these events resonate with her past experiences and inform her writing.
The Writing Process of Lion
Sonja provides an intimate look into her writing methodology:
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Journaling: A long-term journal keeper, she mined her journals for pivotal moments and sentences that captured significant memories and emotions.
“The journals, the highlight journals, became the sort of starting point. And then I transcribed moments into my laptop...”
— Sonja Walgar [28:00] -
Crafting Sentences: Sonja meticulously crafts each sentence, often utilizing unexpected analogies to convey deeper meanings:
“Every sentence has been like painted with a watercolor brush or something. So deliberate.”
— Zibby Owens [21:28] -
Mantra for Writing: She adheres to a guiding principle to utilize existing material and resist the temptation to add extraneous elements:
“You have everything you need. You can just keep working what you have.”
— Sonja Walgar [28:00]
Sonja discusses the evolution of Lion, noting that integrating present-day reflections with past narratives allowed the book to coalesce more seamlessly.
Personal Reflections and Parenting
A significant portion of the conversation revolves around Sonja's reflections on parenting, influenced by her father's unpredictable nature:
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Contrasting Parenting Styles: Sonja contrasts her father's adrenaline-seeking behaviors with the patience and stability required in parenting young children.
“Adrenaline is the opposite of parenting. The absolute opposite.”
— Sonja Walgar [13:57] -
Influence and Adaptation: She discusses how her upbringing has shaped her own parenting approach, striving to incorporate both her mother's competency and a more playful, flexible demeanor:
“It's such a symbiosis. I inherit from my mom sort of extreme competency...”
— Sonja Walgar [19:31] -
Realizations Through Parenting: Visits with her children provided her with new perspectives, revealing aspects of herself that were previously unexplored:
“I was... much more pliant than I. Than I sort of usually am.”
— Sonja Walgar [19:31]
Writing Style and Literary Influences
Sonja attributes her poetic and analogy-rich writing style to her lifelong love of reading and literary influences:
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Literary Inspirations: She cites Mary Oliver as a significant influence, admiring her ability to distill complex emotions into simple, lyrical prose.
“I love poetry. And my favorite is the poetry of Mary Oliver... She just is clear as a bell and so much distilled into this deceptively simple musical lyricism.”
— Sonja Walgar [23:09] -
Perfectionism and Inspiration: Her high standards, fostered by extensive reading, drive her to produce deliberate and impactful sentences, ensuring that each line serves the narrative purpose.
Conclusion and Future Plans
As the conversation winds down, Sonja reflects on her journey from podcasting to authoring, expressing her commitment to continue writing:
“If I don't write a book, it's not okay... I have to say I felt incomplete.”
— Sonja Walgar [27:17]
Zibby Owens commends Sonja's dedication and poetic prowess, highlighting her as a featured guest at an upcoming retreat and expressing excitement for Sonja's future works.
Notable Quotes
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On Autofiction:
“It's a work of fiction in which everything happened is my line on this book.”
— Sonja Walgar [04:22] -
On Writing as Self-Discovery:
“Writing is really where I synthesize things and integrate them.”
— Sonja Walgar [08:40] -
On Parenting:
“Adrenaline is the opposite of parenting. The absolute opposite.”
— Sonja Walgar [13:57] -
On Literary Standards:
“I hold the bar really high... I just can't write a bad book. I just. I'll die if I write a bad book.”
— Sonja Walgar [23:09]
Final Thoughts
Sonja Walgar's Lion offers a poignant exploration of a daughter's relationship with her larger-than-life father, weaving personal narrative with literary finesse. Through this episode, listeners gain deep insights into the complexities of autofiction, the healing power of writing, and the intricate dance of parenting shaped by one's upbringing. Sonja's eloquent expressions and reflective demeanor make for a compelling conversation that resonates with anyone interested in the intersections of family, memory, and storytelling.