Podcast Summary: "Durand Bernarr - I'm A Sex Symbol"

Podcast Information:

• Title: Toure Show
• Host/Author: DCP Entertainment
• Episode: Durand Bernarr - I'm A Sex Symbol
• Release Date: December 8, 2024
• Description: Touré engages with successful individuals to uncover their paths to success and glean insights that can aid listeners on their own journeys.

1. Introduction and Initial Conversation [00:56 - 02:45]

The episode begins with a brief exchange between Durand Bernarr and Host Touré. Touré warmly welcomes Durand, acknowledging his phenomenal persona and legendary status.

• Notable Quote:
  • [01:02] Touré: "That might be the best question I've ever been asked."
  • [01:15] Touré: "God, that is so much of what the next generation is talking about. Fuck the boxes."

This segment sets the tone for an open and candid discussion, emphasizing authenticity over fitting into predefined categories.

2. Early Life and Musical Influences [03:00 - 07:35]

Durand delves into his upbringing, highlighting the musical environment fostered by his parents. His mother, a teacher, and his father, an audio engineer, played pivotal roles in nurturing his talent from a young age.

• Notable Quotes:
  • [03:01] Touré: "And you have, like, all these different things. You can come up high, you can croon down low. It's like all the different moves you want, he can do."
  • [03:13] Durand: "I'm a sponge. I've been listening to so much stuff like growing up from house to jazz, gospel, rock."
  • [06:05] Durand: "Like, my voice was changing. So that was like, my middle was completely shot. Like, my lows and my highs were there, but it was just trying to figure out that middle part."

Durand credits a diverse range of artists, including Rick James, Nate Dogg, Erykah Badu, and Chaka Khan, for shaping his musical style. He also discusses overcoming vocal challenges during puberty, thanks to his mother's guidance on vocal care.

3. Relationship with Erykah Badu [10:57 - 15:48]

A significant portion of the conversation revolves around Durand's relationship with Erykah Badu. He recounts how a mixtape of Badu covers he released on her birthday garnered her attention, leading to a personal and professional collaboration.

• Notable Quotes:
  • [11:13] Durand: "She was retweeting the link, all that stuff. Then the following year, she reached out personally and was like, I want you in my band."
  • [13:36] Durand: "She taught me how not to internalize. Like, not to take what someone else is feeling and make it like, oh, what did I do?"
  • [15:04] Durand: "She also said that if you're going to, you know, be kind and do something, doing it because it's out of the kindness of your heart, not because you're trying to, you know, get anything out from anyone."

Erykah Badu served not only as a mentor but also as an informal therapist, imparting lessons on self-awareness, authenticity, and maintaining healthy boundaries in relationships.

4. Personal Identity and Sexuality [09:05 - 16:43]

Durand opens up about his sexual identity, emphasizing a fluid and experiential approach rather than fitting into specific labels. He discusses the evolution of his self-acceptance and the challenges faced within both familial and societal contexts.

• Notable Quotes:
  • [09:20] Durand: "I don't identify as gay or bisexual or that I've always just said, I'm me."
  • [10:07] Durand: "I desire to have meaningful experiences with other people from time to time while still leaving room for exclusivity in my relationship."
  • [15:48] Touré: "When we say 'fuck the boxes,' it really captures the essence of breaking free from restrictive labels."

Durand emphasizes the importance of being authentic and experienced rather than being confined to labels, advocating for a more fluid understanding of sexuality.

5. Current Projects and Future Plans [19:42 - 22:50]

Durand discusses his recent and upcoming musical projects, revealing a diversification in his artistic endeavors. He has released two EPs in the current year and is actively working on a love-themed album slated for early next year.

• Notable Quotes:
  • [19:45] Durand: "The first one was Enroute, which is a road trip story."
  • [21:31] Durand: "I've been goofy 90% of my music. The next album is going to be a love album."
  • [22:10] Durand: "Got with a group, Charlie Vituno, who's based out in LA, and I heard them for my on my recommended on Spotify."

He also touches upon his collaboration with up-and-coming artists, emphasizing the importance of nurturing new talent and remaining versatile in his musical style.

6. Personal Growth and Mental Health [26:00 - 30:40]

The conversation shifts to Durand's journey with self-awareness and mental health. He reflects on his experiences with therapy, the significance of understanding one's triggers, and the impact of past traumas on his present self.

• Notable Quotes:
  • [26:08] Durand: "I've been resting in the slow burn. The consistency of it."
  • [29:35] Durand: "I'm looking for someone that has put in or let me change that. Someone that is far along in their healing."
  • [35:37] Durand: "The thing is, when you let someone know that they've done something, that's my attempt to mend the whatever that's going on."

Durand emphasizes the importance of emotional healing and seeking relationships that are supportive rather than toxic, highlighting his commitment to self-improvement and healthy interpersonal connections.

7. Views on Relationships and Dating [30:40 - 35:37]

Durand shares his perspectives on modern relationships, particularly focusing on ethical non-monogamy and the importance of transparency and honesty. He discusses his approach to dating, the challenges of aligning relationship expectations, and the value he places on mutual growth.

• Notable Quotes:
  • [29:57] Durand: "I am sex positive, ethically non-monogamous."
  • [30:04] Durand: "Cause cheating is, that's very possible in that because all you have to do is just not."
  • [35:37] Durand: "When I tell you that lesson alone on not internalizing has really saved me in so many different areas."

He advocates for open communication and setting clear boundaries to foster healthy and fulfilling relationships, moving away from traditional monogamous frameworks.

8. Experiences of Being a Black Artist [36:11 - 43:59]

Durand reflects on his identity as a Black artist, discussing the societal challenges and personal experiences that shape his music and persona. He touches upon the intersectionality of race, sexuality, and artistic expression, emphasizing resilience and authenticity.

• Notable Quotes:
  • [36:11] Durand: "Being black is for me, it reminds me of, like, when I would go outside as a little boy and I would wear, like, pink shoes, or I would walk out and I would have a Barbie in my hand."
  • [44:05] Durand: "There are masculine men who hate feminine men. They bottom shame."
  • [46:15] Durand: "This ain't your story. Just like when I went to my dad when I was a teenager, inquiring about if he had ever had feelings for men before."

Durand emphasizes the importance of representation and the ongoing struggle against societal norms and prejudices, advocating for a more inclusive and understanding environment for Black and queer individuals.

9. Conclusion and Final Thoughts [70:52 - 71:03]

In the closing moments, Durand and Touré engage in a light-hearted exchange, reflecting on the depth of their conversation and the personal journey they’ve explored together.

• Notable Quotes:
  • [70:02] Durand: "I learned that you're married. Cause I didn't know that."
  • [71:03] Touré: "Thanks for hanging out with us. The Toure Show gives you fuel to power your dreams..."

Durand concludes by reaffirming his commitment to self-improvement and fostering meaningful connections, both personally and professionally.

Key Insights and Takeaways:

• Authenticity Over Labels: Durand advocates for living authentically without confining oneself to predefined labels, especially concerning sexuality and identity.
• Mentorship and Influence: His relationship with Erykah Badu underscores the importance of mentorship in personal and professional growth.
• Mental Health Awareness: Durand emphasizes the significance of self-awareness, therapy, and understanding personal triggers in maintaining mental well-being.
• Ethical Non-Monogamy: He presents a thoughtful perspective on modern relationships, highlighting the need for honesty and mutual growth.
• Representation Matters: As a Black queer artist, Durand stresses the importance of representation in media and the arts, fighting against societal prejudices.
• Continuous Growth: His journey reflects an ongoing commitment to personal development, emotional healing, and fostering healthy relationships.

This episode of the Toure Show offers a deep dive into Durand Bernarr’s life, unpacking his experiences, challenges, and triumphs as a multifaceted artist and individual striving for authenticity and meaningful connections.