Trading Secrets Episode 257: Chris Voss Returns!

Guest: Chris Voss (Former FBI Lead Crisis Negotiator, Author, Entrepreneur)
Host: Jason Tartick
Release Date: October 13, 2025

Episode Overview

This episode features the celebrated negotiation expert Chris Voss, renowned as the FBI’s former lead international hostage negotiator and the founder of the Black Swan Group. Host Jason Tartick dives deep into actionable negotiation tactics and real-world advice for navigating both high-stakes situations and everyday life decisions. The conversation covers everything from political negotiations and business dealings to relationships and self-worth, providing “trading secrets” listeners can immediately use.

Main Themes

• The Art and Science of Negotiation: Real-world strategies for reading people, building trust, handling pressure, and securing better outcomes in negotiations.
• Negotiation in Business, Politics, and Personal Life: How principles from high-stakes environments (hostage situations, international politics) apply in relationships, workplaces, and financial decisions.
• Self-Protection & Power in Negotiation: When to walk away, how to detect bad deals, and why your intuition is your most powerful tool.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Modern Political Negotiations & Trump’s Tactics

[02:21-08:08]

• Chris Voss analyzes current political negotiations, highlighting how Donald Trump negotiates differently compared to traditional politicians.
  • Quote: “He doesn’t want to waste time. And if you’re going to waste his time, he’s not willing to stay in and get a lousy deal... no deal is better than a bad deal. He knows that.” (Chris Voss, 04:44)
• Politicians often 'grandstand' rather than negotiate for outcomes; Trump cuts through this by seeking direct, outcome-driven talks.
• Practical Insight: Avoid “negotiating to stay employed.” Go after real results and outcomes, not just appearances.

2. Negotiation Tactics: Extreme Anchoring vs. Accusation Audit

[09:27-15:22]

• Extreme Anchoring: Opening with an assertively high offer is context-dependent and best for environments where a deal is likely (e.g., mediation, trade deals).
  • Quote: “Extreme anchoring tends to be effective if you’re locked into a relationship and going to make a deal. But if not, you risk driving away the other party.” (Chris Voss, 10:23)
• Accusation Audit: Proactively naming concerns or objections before the other side brings them up.
  • “You’re going to hate me for this, but…” disarms emotional pushback.
• Never burn bridges—even when you walk away, do so with respect (“In a limo, out in a limo”—the Oprah rule).

3. Dealing with ‘Ghosting’ in Personal and Professional Relationships

[15:22-19:46]

• Being ghosted often means your previous communication didn’t make the other party feel progress.
• Actionable Tool: Use the “Have you given up on...” question. If you get silence, that’s your answer.
  • Quote: “If you get silence, the answer is yes—they have given up.” (Chris Voss, 19:37)

4. High-Stakes Negotiations: Prenups, Mediation & Laying Bad News

[20:39-26:44]

• Raise dealbreakers (like prenups) as early as possible.
• Accusation Audit Applied: Voice the negative assumptions (“You’re going to think I’m a despicable person for bringing this up”) before presenting your point. People handle bad news much better when “sufficiently warned.”
  • Quote: “Don’t pull your punches. Say it as negatively as you can... if you do it really well, your bad news is going to be a relief.” (Chris Voss, 24:20)

5. Hostage Negotiation Translated: Relief Through Understanding

[28:05-30:42]

• Walking into a family’s home during a kidnapping, Chris immediately acknowledges their emotions (“I know you’re scared, angry, abandoned...and you blame me.”) to build instant trust and clear negativity.
• Quote: “I’ve cleaned out all the negativity... if you understand me that well, the chances of you understanding this situation are very high.” (Chris Voss, 30:21)

6. Handling Tight-Lipped or Narcissistic Negotiation Opponents

[31:01-40:55]

• If someone is reserved, it’s likely due to past betrayals or not feeling heard. Deep curiosity will break down their barriers—people open up when they feel genuinely listened to.
• With narcissists or “control freaks,” the answer is clear: walk away. Bad deals block good deals and cost far more in the long run.
  • Quote: “No deal is better than a bad deal, and a bad deal usually costs five times as much as a good deal.” (Chris Voss, 39:10)
• Recognizing Red and Yellow Flags: Trust your gut—when you sense something’s off, heed the warning early.

7. The Power and Science of Intuition

[43:45-44:28]

• Your subconscious processes 20 million bits of information per second versus 40 for your conscious mind—use your gut instincts for decision-making.
  • Quote: “The subconscious mind, which feeds your gut, per second is 20 million to 40. 500,000 to 1 ratio.” (Chris Voss, 43:59)

8. Emotional Intelligence in Negotiation

[45:04-48:10]

• Emotions like anger are often a mask for fear or injury. Authentic anger differs fundamentally from strategic displays of anger, which are short-term manipulations that have long-term destructive consequences.
• Recognize the difference between genuine and manufactured emotional displays.

9. Negotiating Compensation and Value at Work

[50:24-53:23]

• Demonstrate you were and continue to be a bargain to your employer; show how you drive ROI.
• Frame the conversation around the future and your continuing impact to justify raises or promotions.
  • Quote: “An employee that understands how they’re moving the needle is ten times more valuable than somebody who’s completely oblivious to their actions’ impact on a company.” (Chris Voss, 52:06)

10. Biggest Negotiation Mistakes and the Chris Voss Trading Secret

[53:54-55:05]

• Be willing to articulate what your gut tells you the other person is worried about. Anticipating negative impacts and expressing emotional intelligence makes you the kind of professional or partner people want to keep around.
  • Quote: “Just be willing to articulate what your gut’s telling you the other person is thinking and think about the future.” (Chris Voss, 53:54)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “No deal is better than a bad deal.” (Chris Voss, multiple times — 04:44, 39:10, 40:55)
• “Say out loud what you know they’re going to think. Call out the elephant in the room, don’t deny it.” (Chris Voss, 22:15)
• “Curiosity is an irresistible force... no matter how tight lipped you are, if I’m deeply curious, you’re going to open up.” (Chris Voss, 33:16)
• “The warning label: this should be used to put you and your partners and your business and your life in a better spot, not as forms of manipulation.” (Jason Tartick, 71:03)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• Trump’s negotiation style vs. traditional politics: [02:21]
• Anchoring vs. Accusation Audit: [10:14]
• Ghosting explained & the power of 'Have you given up on...?': [15:48]
• Accusation audits in relationships and prenups: [21:13]
• Real hostage negotiation story – providing relief through understanding: [28:25]
• Unlocking tight-lipped people and using curiosity: [32:02], [33:14]
• Dealing with narcissists/control freaks & trusting your gut: [39:10], [43:45]
• Why and how to negotiate raises and salaries effectively: [50:24]
• Biggest negotiation mistake – honest articulation: [53:54]

Actionable “Trading Secrets” from Chris Voss

• Always address the other side’s concerns before they voice them—it's disarming and builds trust.
• Walk away early when you sense a deal is wrong; sticking with bad deals blocks good opportunities.
• Your intuition is a supercomputer; learn to distinguish between gut feeling and wishful or fearful thinking.
• Show you’re a bargain and focused on making an impact when negotiating pay—think like your boss!
• Emotional intelligence and honesty, even when bearing bad news, go farther than strategic deception.

Resources and Where to Learn More

• Visit BlackSwanLTD.com for Chris Voss’s negotiation community and training resources.
• Chris’s bestselling books: Never Split the Difference, Empathy and Uncertainty in Business, The Full Fee Agent.

Stay tuned at the end of the episode for Jason and David’s reflective recap, which translates Voss’s negotiation wisdom into relatable, everyday takeaways about business, relationships, intuition, and personal growth.