TRIGGERnometry Podcast Summary
Episode: The Masculinity Crisis and How To Solve It - Nick Freitas
Date: December 3, 2025
Host(s): Konstantin Kisin, Francis Foster
Guest: Nick Freitas
Duration: ~80 minutes
Overview
This episode explores the ongoing "crisis of masculinity" in Western societies. Former Green Beret and politician Nick Freitas joins hosts Konstantin Kisin and Francis Foster to dissect how cultural, educational, and economic shifts have impacted young men and their sense of purpose, agency, and value. The discussion analyzes root causes—absent fathers, demonization of masculinity, societal priorities—and offers guidance on reclaiming positive masculinity, forming strong relationships, and finding meaning. The conversation is peppered with Freitas' characteristic directness, military anecdotes, and a focus on personal responsibility, transcendent values, and the importance of healthy male and female roles.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Modern Demonization of Masculinity
Timestamps: [00:02], [02:24], [58:32]
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Freitas accuses modern Western institutions (schools, churches, media) of consistently diminishing young men’s value:
- "Never before in human history have we had an entire culturally shaped, like almost every single major culturally shaping institution telling young men they were crap." – Freitas [00:02, 61:17]
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Masculine traits like aggression, competitiveness, and stoicism are recast as problems ("toxic") to be eradicated rather than harnessed productively.
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Consequences:
- Societal unhappiness across genders, lack of meaning for men, and a bifurcation of identity: Young men can "either become noble, strong, competent… or choose bitterness and vengeance."
- "The more that the feminization of our educational systems, our churches, everything else, the more that has taken place, the less happy everyone is." – Freitas [07:28]
2. The Importance of Male Role Models & Fathers
Timestamps: [06:02] – [14:59]
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Absence of fathers, especially in working-class and minority communities, is a primary driver of the crisis.
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Boys inherently seek structure, hierarchy, and initiation into adulthood, and will find it elsewhere (gangs, online figures) if not provided by dads or strong male mentors.
- "Men, boys are looking for structure. They're looking for hierarchy. They're looking for someone to train them up and what they should do and to find their role in place within society." – Freitas [06:39]
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The feminization of schools means boys experience authority predominantly from women.
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Women can’t teach boys to be men as men can; nor can men do the reverse for daughters.
- "Women will not be able to teach men to be men as well as men ... We need women to actually help raise daughters." – Host 1 & Freitas [11:26 – 11:44]
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Sensible risk and confrontation are part of masculine maturation:
- "I try to protect my kids from scars, but bruises are just a part of life. So I'm trying to protect them from things that are going to have life-altering impacts ... But when it comes to getting knocked on your ass, welcome to life, son." – Freitas [13:23]
3. Healthy Aggression, Discipline, & the Use of Strength
Timestamps: [17:20] – [22:52]
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Aggression is not to be suppressed but channeled constructively.
- "No civilization in history has ever been protected by docile, weak men that were afraid of conflict." – Freitas [18:08]
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Training emotional restraint and discernment is key. A strong man knows when and how to use aggression, or when to restrain it.
- "If you have a strong spiritual bearing ... intellectual capacity ... emotional maturity ... and physical capability ... You are now the sort of person that can be dangerous on behalf of the things you love, but never to the things you love." – Freitas [21:10]
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Martial prowess and ‘warrior’ credentials still impress—even among men with no intention of violence—because they symbolize the ability to protect.
4. Economic, Social, and Ideological Pressures
Timestamps: [08:49] – [10:00], [25:18], [51:10] – [56:28]
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Economic changes (inflation, cost of living) challenge traditional family structures where one parent (often the mother) might stay home.
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Freitas recounts prioritizing family over material comfort, and how sacrifice enabled a strong family.
- "Did we make as much money, have as nice a house, have as nice clothes, furniture as car? Nope. But I have an outstanding relationship with all three of my kids..." – Freitas [10:00]
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Ideological frameworks, such as intersectionality, are criticized for turning suffering and emotional struggle into identities, stripping individuals (especially men) of agency and self-determination.
- "The thing that never should have entered into this conversation is, and now you're a victim. That's a core component of your identity... It's destructive for the individual. It's incredibly beneficial for the political structures that benefit from them." – Freitas [33:01, 54:24]
5. The Andrew Tate Phenomenon & Society’s Role
Timestamps: [27:09] – [33:49]
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Andrew Tate is held up as a symptom, not the cause, of societal failure.
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Young men gravitate to figures like Tate (despite flawed moral messaging) because they see no mainstream alternatives sticking up for their value.
- "Andrew Tate was one of the few people sticking up for those young men when nobody else would ... before you go heavy on trashing that, you better be able to provide an alternative. What are they fighting for? Have you provided an alternative worth following, or are you just trashing that guy?" – Freitas [30:29]
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The failure of religious and conservative spaces to elevate models of tough, virtuous, competent men is to blame for this vacuum.
6. Processing Emotion, Stoicism, and Mature Resilience
Timestamps: [36:06] – [49:43]
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Men require emotional control, especially in crisis—compartmentalization is a positive skill, not a flaw.
- "It is not appropriate for you to cry in the midst of crisis. That's when you're supposed to compartmentalize." – Freitas [36:10]
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Post-crisis, men should develop strong friendships and mentorship networks, but selective sharing is sensible—there’s skepticism towards modern therapy.
- "Mentors, peers, and mentees ... when we develop those kind of relationships where we can sit down and we can talk ... that again, I think the shared faith really, really does matter." – Freitas [42:11]
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Men transfer vulnerability into humor or controlled anger to avoid appearing weak.
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Women can better enable men’s willingness to open up by affirming respect and loyalty—not demanding vulnerability as a precondition.
- "If you want him to be able to open up to you, I would recommend that you do two things. One, you make sure that man knows you respect him and you're on his side." – Freitas [47:59]
7. What’s the Solution for Young Men?
Timestamps: [58:32] – [64:56]
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Acknowledge the unique challenges today’s young men face:
Constant denigration and lack of affirmation at every developmental stage.- "You don't get to pretend that you know what it's like to be told your entire life that every single instinct... that was rewarded by a wife and a child and a grateful nation, I don't know what any of that is." – Freitas, quoting a friend [59:48]
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Older men must recognize the unprecedented burdens on this generation, and offer mentorship not judgment.
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Advice for young men:
- Seek meaning and purpose; it's not delivered from outside or culture, but by personal choices.
- Reclaim and model noble masculinity—irrespective of pop culture’s signals.
- Build relationships that matter—family, faith, loyal friendships.
- Pursue “being the good man the times require”—expect no applause, but trust that women (over time) are instinctively drawn to real honor and strength, regardless of mainstream claims.
8. Restoring Harmony Between Men and Women
Timestamps: [66:36] – [71:35]
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Continual antagonism is unsustainable:
- "We really need to find a way to bridge the gap between men and women, and not just conservative men, but also liberal women." – Host 2 [66:36]
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Many liberal/feminist women—and men—are realizing that cultural promises don’t deliver lasting happiness.
- "We live in the most feminist, futurist, female empowering point in world history for women. And the women who are most miserable ... are liberal women between the ages of 18 and 29. It's over 50% ..." – Freitas [67:18]
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Freitas: An imperfect but faithful attempt to apply traditional values and roles produces outsized benefits—don’t be apologetic about living what works.
- "It's not an aesthetic or a fetish ... It's the idea of if you're willing to entertain the possibility that maybe, just maybe, we were created for very specific and important roles that are not supposed to be competitive, they're supposed to be cooperative ... when we actually embrace them, we're all happier." – Freitas [69:00]
9. A Warning & The Path Forward
Timestamps: [74:29] – [77:36]
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Freitas warns that Western societies are facing a growing inability to peacefully reconcile their deepest value differences.
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He draws a line: should society attempt to fundamentally prevent him and others from providing for, protecting, or raising their families according to conscience, there will be pushback—though he stresses hope for peaceful means.
- "We're reaching the point in the west where it is going to become very, very difficult to peacefully reconcile our differences... We're coming to a point where there is either one side's going to win or there's going to be some sort of forced separation..." – Freitas [74:40]
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He reiterates: The goal is to convince, not to defeat fellow citizens—violence and conflict are tragic outcomes to be avoided if possible.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
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On Crisis of Masculinity:
- "The sucky part ... for young men is, the only way through this is if you choose to be the good man that the times require. That's it." – Freitas [63:47]
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On Role Models:
- "You were responsible for all the world's ills, right? Everything about you is wrong. And the only thing that you have to look forward in your life is to sit down, shut up, and now do as you're told as penance for things that happened before you were ever born. That is unjust as hell." – Freitas [60:32]
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On Constructive Masculinity:
- "You are now the sort of person that can be dangerous on behalf of the things you love, but never to the things you love." – Freitas [21:10]
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On Feminism and Female Misery:
- "The women who are most miserable ... are liberal women between the ages of 18 and 29. It's over 50%." – Freitas [67:18]
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On Empathy & Identity:
- "We have taken things that we struggle with ... and we've made them our identity." – Freitas [53:17]
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On Aggression as Biological & Social Fact:
- "Maybe God put it there for a reason. Maybe there's some positive manifestations of this, and maybe our job as parents, as fathers, as mothers, as a society is to help direct things in those positive manifestations." – Freitas [25:20]
Structured Timeline of Key Segments
| Timestamp | Topic or Quote | |---------------|----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 00:02 | Freitas: "Never before in human history..."—opening salvo on masculine demonization | | 06:02 | Fathers, structure, male role models: “Boys are looking for structure…” | | 13:23 | Age-appropriate risk, letting sons handle bullies: “Your son doesn’t want the bully…” | | 18:08 | On why aggression can’t be extinguished: “No civilization in history…” | | 21:10 | On fully developed, integrated masculinity: "Dangerous on behalf of what you love, never to it"| | 27:09 | Toxic masculinity vs “toxic femininity,” both have positive/negative channels | | 30:29 | Andrew Tate as symptom, not cause—society’s vacuum for male role models | | 36:10 | On emotional control: “It is not appropriate … to cry in the midst of crisis.” | | 42:11 | Mentorship: “You need mentors, you need peers, and you need mentees.” | | 51:10 | Intersectionality & victimhood identity critique | | 58:32 | Unique generational challenges for men and advice on meaning | | 67:18 | Feminist young women’s misery; need to stop apologizing for traditional roles | | 74:29 | (Near end) Western society facing irreconcilable worldviews—warning about coming crisis |
Final Thoughts
- The episode provides a comprehensive critique of how modern society undervalues and misrepresents masculinity, while also offering tangible advice for young men, older mentors, and society at large.
- Freitas calls for a return to disciplined, noble, purpose-driven masculinity—supported by strong male-female partnership, spiritual transcendence, and community.
- The path forward requires both personal responsibility and a movement to revive the role models and frameworks that once sustained men, women, and civilization as a whole.
For more: Check out the full conversation and listener Q&A on triggerpod.co.uk.
