True Crime with Kendall Rae
Episode: "Stalked & Murdered by Her Own BF?! The Devastating Murder of Lilie James"
Date: March 26, 2026
Podcast by: Mile Higher Media & Audioboom Studios
Host: Kendall Rae
Episode Overview
Kendall Rae covers the tragic murder of 21-year-old Lilie James, a vibrant young woman from Australia, who was brutally killed by her short-term boyfriend, Paul Tyson. The episode not only details the timeline and investigation but also delves deep into conversations about domestic violence, the systemic failures around protecting women, and the grieving process for families left behind. Rae’s empathetic, victim-centered approach shines through as she centers Lilie’s life and legacy, as well as the community response.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Lilie James: Background and Personality
[01:06–07:10]
- Early Life: Lilie was born May 21, 2002, in the Sydney suburb of San Souci.
- Family and Upbringing: Close to her parents (Peta and Jamie), brother Max, and grandmother Barbara.
- Personality: Described as energetic, vibrant, loyal, beautiful, and kind. Always went out of her way to make people's days better.
- Education & Ambitions: Attended all-girls school Dane Bank, then studied sports business at University of Technology, Sydney.
- Interests: Passionate about swimming and dancing; coached water polo at St. Andrews Cathedral School.
"Her loved ones also describe her as loyal, beautiful, kind to everyone, and that she always went out of her way to make people's day better." — Kendall Rae [04:00]
2. Paul Tyson: Background and Character
[07:10–11:27]
- Origin: Born in 1999 in the Netherlands; later moved to Australia.
- School Reputation: Attended St. Andrews Cathedral School; recognized for leadership roles but viewed as "arrogant," "pompous," and objectifying by many male peers.
- Work: Returned to St. Andrews as a coach and after-hours coordinator while studying for a master's in teaching.
- Dual Persona: Created a likeable persona around women while being disliked by many men for his true behaviors.
"Paul seemed to be that type of person… able to mask their true colors until you get to know them more, and then he shows you exactly who he is." — Kendall Rae [07:36]
3. The Relationship and Breakup
[11:27–13:55]
- Brief, Casual Relationship: Started dating in September 2023. Relationship was short (about five weeks), casual, and unpublicized.
- Breakup: Lilie, busy with work and study, ended the relationship; reports differ on whether it was mutual but most indicate she initiated the breakup.
"We both sat down at the start of the relationship and decided that neither of us wanted anything serious. We just wanted some fun. And once it had run its course, you know, we would go our separate ways." — Lilie’s mom recounting Lilie [12:12]
- No Red Flags: Friends and family saw no red flags during the short relationship.
4. The Night of the Murder
[13:55–20:32]
- October 25, 2023: Day begins normally; Lilie’s demeanor is routine and there are no warnings.
- Disturbing Text: Around 8:30pm, Lilie’s father Jamie receives a strange text from Lilie’s phone asking to be picked up, with odd wording.
- Father’s Search: Jamie arrives at St. Andrews; can’t find Lilie but finds her belongings.
- Horrific Discovery: Police and ambulance arrive; Lilie’s body is soon discovered in the gym bathroom. She was brutally bludgeoned with a hammer. The family is devastated and left with an unimaginable loss.
"I'll never forget that one moment in time when the realization that she'll never walk through that door again. Will haunt me for the rest of my life." — Jamie (Lilie’s father) [20:14]
5. Investigation and Evidence
[20:32–25:40]
- Immediate Suspicion: Police quickly focus on Paul Tyson due to the breakup, security footage, and an anonymous midnight call (traced to Paul’s location).
- Security Footage: Shows Paul following Lilie into the bathroom at 7:00 pm, leaving with his bag at 8:00 pm. Lilie never left.
- Deceptive Actions: Texts sent from Lilie’s phone to her father after her death; thought to be a ruse to manipulate the timeline or ensure Jamie found her.
- Manhunt: Paul’s location traced to Vaucluse, a cliff known for suicides. Camera footage shows him disposing of evidence and waiting for nearly two hours before calling police.
6. Paul Tyson’s Suicide and Aftermath
[25:40–34:47]
- Discovery: Paul is found dead at the base of the cliffs two days later; determined to be suicide.
- Premeditation: Police believe the murder was planned—evidenced by car rental, hardware store purchase, and retrieving a hammer from school.
- Psychological Insight: Forensic psychologist attributes Paul’s actions to narcissistic injury triggered by Lilie’s rejection.
- Family’s Pain: Lilie’s family left with unanswered questions and without chance for justice.
"You're left with questions that we could have asked him… But none of it is going to bring her back. So, you know, there’s no happy ending to this for us." — Jamie (Lilie’s father) [34:20]
7. Community Reaction and Memorials
[34:47–38:36]
- Community Mourning: St. Andrews cancels classes, provides counseling. Vigils and a permanent memorial held.
- Remembering Lilie: Staff, students, and community celebrate Lilie’s bright personality, impact, and kindness.
- Family Support: Over $20,000 raised for Lilie’s family; celebration of life held with attendees wearing bright colors in her honor.
"Her energy was bright like the sun, which seemed to be a sentiment shared by so many people who came across her in life." — Kendall Rae [35:40]
8. Paul Tyson’s History and Domestic Violence Discussion
[38:36–45:00]
- Pattern of Behavior: Paul’s ex-girlfriend describes controlling, stalker-like, and frightening behavior when she ended their relationship; suggests Lilie wasn’t his first target.
- Domestic Violence Stats: Lilie is the 4th woman murdered in NSW within 10 days, one of 58 domestic homicide victims in 2023.
- Systemic Failures: Discussion on government and institutional shortcomings in protecting women; emphasis on the need to teach rejection and empathy to children.
"Why is it 'don't get killed,' not 'don't kill'? Why isn’t the emphasis put on the perpetrator?" — Kendall Rae [39:50]
- Family’s Advocacy: Jamie and Peta voice the importance of reframing narratives around domestic violence and teaching children how to handle rejection.
9. Criticism of Institutional Response
[45:00–48:32]
- School Negligence: Lilie’s family considers suing St. Andrews for insufficient after-hours security and a lack of duty of care.
- Controversial Principal Statement: Principal’s newsletter downplays Paul’s actions, calling him "an absolute delight" despite the crime.
"He was not a monster. Rather, in the last five hours of his life, he committed a monstrous act… in complete contradiction to what everyone who knew him observed..." — St. Andrews Principal (quoted by Kendall Rae) [46:36]
- Community sees principal’s comments as insensitive, making excuses for the perpetrator and minimizing the severity of the murder.
- Public Outrage: Listeners and community members express anger that the statement blames outside influences and not Paul.
10. Reflections, Legacy & Ongoing Issues
[48:32–51:40]
- Impact on Women & Dating: After Lilie’s murder, friends express fear about dating; highlighting the ongoing impact of violence against women.
- Lilie Remembered: Deep condolences are offered to all who loved her; her light and potential are recognized as a loss to the world.
- Calls to Action: Listeners reminded of resources for domestic violence; Rae emphasizes the need for collective change.
"I can confidently say that just from the little I've learned about her that the world is dimmer without her light." — Kendall Rae [51:00]
Notable Quotes & Timestamps
- "Her loved ones also describe her as loyal, beautiful, kind to everyone, and that she always went out of her way to make people's day better." — Kendall Rae [04:00]
- "We both sat down at the start of the relationship and decided that neither of us wanted anything serious . . . we would go our separate ways." — Lilie’s mom quoting Lilie [12:12]
- "I'll never forget that one moment in time when the realization that she'll never walk through that door again. Will haunt me for the rest of my life." — Jamie James [20:14]
- "You're left with questions that we could have asked him... but none of it is going to bring her back.” — Jamie James [34:20]
- "Why is it 'don’t get killed,' not 'don’t kill'?" — Kendall Rae [39:50]
- "He was not a monster. Rather, in the last five hours of his life, he committed a monstrous act which was in complete contradiction to what everyone who knew him observed..." — St. Andrews Principal [46:36]
- "I can confidently say that just from the little I've learned about her that the world is dimmer without her light." — Kendall Rae [51:00]
Timestamps for Key Segments
- 01:06–07:10 — Lilie’s background & life
- 07:10–11:27 — Paul Tyson’s background & reputation
- 11:27–13:55 — Relationship timeline & breakup
- 13:55–20:32 — The night of the murder & discovery
- 20:32–25:40 — Investigation, Paul’s actions, manhunt
- 25:40–34:47 — Suicide of Paul Tyson & aftermath
- 34:47–38:36 — Community mourning & memorials
- 38:36–45:00 — Paul’s history, DV discussion, systemic failures
- 45:00–48:32 — Institutional criticism, school response
- 48:32–51:40 — Reflections, impact on women, calls to action
Tone and Approach
Kendall Rae maintains a compassionate, empathetic tone throughout. She centers the victim and family, avoids sensationalism, and thoughtfully discusses broader issues, such as domestic violence and institutional shortcomings, urging awareness and reform.
Resources
- Rae notes that domestic violence resources are linked in the show notes.
- Listeners are encouraged to reflect, discuss, and advocate for stronger protections for victims.
Summary prepared for those who wish to understand the impactful and tragic story of Lilie James, her legacy, and the urgent conversations about violence against women.
