Diamonds in the Rough: Dying for Sex & Jacuzzi Jets

Summary

Podcast Summary: Two Ts In A Pod with Teddi Mellencamp and Tamra Judge
Episode Title: Diamonds in the Rough: Dying for Sex & Jacuzzi Jets
Release Date: April 10, 2025

Two Ts In A Pod with Teddi Mellencamp and Tamra Judge, hosted by iHeartPodcasts, brings together two dynamic women who delve into personal and relatable topics with humor and honesty. In this episode, "Diamonds in the Rough: Dying for Sex & Jacuzzi Jets," Teddi and Tamra explore the intricate dynamics of relationships, intimacy, and personal growth amidst challenging circumstances.

---

1. Review of 'Dying for Sex' with Michelle Williams

The episode kicks off with a discussion about the FX show Dying for Sex starring Michelle Williams. Tamra provides a succinct overview:

Tamra Judge [02:15]: "We're gonna half discuss us, and we're gonna half discuss this new show that's on FX. It's called Dying for Sex with Michelle Williams."

Teddi echoes Tamra's sentiments, emphasizing the show's relatability:

Teddi Mellencamp [03:28]: "It's about Michelle Williams having cancer, and we watch everything unravel."

They delve into the protagonist's struggle with her husband's diminishing intimacy and the ensuing marital strain, highlighting the broader implications for couples dealing with chronic illnesses.

2. Navigating Relationships and Intimacy Issues

A significant portion of the conversation centers on communication within marriages, especially when external stressors like illness are present. Tamra shares her insights on the importance of voicing one's needs:

Tamra Judge [03:32]: "If you don't speak up for what it is that you want or what it is that you're looking for, most likely your partner is going to do it wrong."

Teddi adds depth by discussing the ebb and flow inherent in long-term relationships:

Teddi Mellencamp [03:46]: "There are ebbs and flows in a marriage... They require daily watering and weeding. It's a daily thing that you have to keep your eye on."

The conversation underscores the necessity of consistent effort and open dialogue to maintain intimacy and prevent partners from becoming strangers under the same roof.

3. Impact of Health and Medications on Sexuality

Tamra and Teddi candidly discuss how health challenges and medications can influence sexual drive and intimacy. Tamra reflects on her experience with antidepressants:

Tamra Judge [05:23]: "I have a sex drive. It's really hard for me to... I can't be doing this all the time."

Teddi relates by sharing her initial reactions to antidepressants affecting her libido:

Teddi Mellencamp [05:39]: "When I first went on antidepressants, I was like, whoa, wait a minute."

They explore the balance between managing mental health and maintaining a healthy sex life, acknowledging the complexities that arise from medication side effects.

4. Personal Health Journeys and Coping Mechanisms

The duo delves into their personal battles with health issues, particularly focusing on Tamra's cancer diagnosis and subsequent treatments. Tamra opens up about her emotional state post-diagnosis:

Tamra Judge [09:19]: "I have tumors the size of plums in my head, and they had to take it out. And like, now part of... I'm feeling sort of depressed."

Teddi empathizes, sharing her own struggles with depression and the challenges of discontinuing antidepressants:

Teddi Mellencamp [10:35]: "I tried that, too... you have to wean yourself off of them."

Their heartfelt exchanges offer listeners a glimpse into the resilience required to navigate serious health issues while maintaining personal relationships.

5. Balancing Parenthood Amidst Health Challenges

Tamra discusses the complexities of parenting while undergoing cancer treatment. She highlights the support system they've built, particularly through the "food train":

Tamra Judge [46:38]: "So the cool thing, I thought you were gonna say, somebody came and cook... But no, it's called the food train. You sign up for a night and you have dinner delivered to the family at 5:00."

Teddi appreciates this solution, recognizing how it alleviates daily pressures:

Teddi Mellencamp [47:14]: "It really, like, frees you up to do other things."

This segment emphasizes the importance of community support and practical solutions in managing family responsibilities during tough times.

6. Supporting Friends Through Illness

Addressing their roles as friends, Tamra and Teddi offer advice on how to support someone battling cancer. Tamra emphasizes active listening:

Tamra Judge [44:46]: "If you truly have a question, you want to help, you have to listen to what the person says.”

Teddi expands on effective communication, stressing the pitfalls of making interactions about oneself:

Teddi Mellencamp [28:07]: "Do you know that? That's all that plays in my home is like meditation and self-help and realization and all that, because I just... I feel like I need it."

Their guidance serves as a valuable resource for listeners seeking to provide meaningful support to loved ones in need.

7. Exploring Sexuality and Personal Fantasies

The conversation takes an open and enlightening turn as Tamra and Teddi explore various aspects of sexuality. They discuss orgasms, squirting, and the importance of sexual exploration:

Tamra Judge [34:13]: "I have pre cancer. I had orgasms. Not...”

Teddi Mellencamp [36:01]: "I remember having orgasms really young."

They share personal anecdotes and encourage experimentation, fostering a safe space for listeners to embrace their sexual identities and desires.

8. Humorous Banter and Light-Hearted Moments

Amidst the heavy topics, Teddi and Tamra inject humor into the conversation, sharing amusing stories and playful teasing. For instance, discussing potential appearances on shows like Masked Singer, they joke about costume mishaps and name confusions:

Teddi Mellencamp [50:09]: "I had the best time."

Tamra Judge [51:34]: "I'm on the dark side."

These moments of levity balance the episode, showcasing the hosts' camaraderie and ability to find humor even in challenging situations.

9. Final Reflections and Listener Engagement

As the episode wraps up, Tamra and Teddi encourage listener interaction, inviting feedback and topic suggestions for future episodes. They emphasize the importance of open communication and continuous support within relationships:

Tamra Judge [33:18]: "The moral of the story, guys, is have conversations, talk about it."

Teddi Mellencamp [33:36]: "There's no better time than the present."

Their closing remarks reinforce the episode's central themes of honesty, vulnerability, and mutual support.

---

Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• Tamra Judge [03:32]: "If you don't speak up for what it is that you want or what it is that you're looking for, most likely your partner is going to do it wrong."

• Teddi Mellencamp [03:46]: "There are ebbs and flows in a marriage... They require daily watering and weeding."

• Tamra Judge [05:23]: "I have a sex drive. It's really hard for me to... I can't be doing this all the time."

• Teddi Mellencamp [10:35]: "I tried that, too... you have to wean yourself off of them."

• Tamra Judge [44:46]: "If you truly have a question, you want to help, you have to listen to what the person says."

• Tamra Judge [33:18]: "The moral of the story, guys, is have conversations, talk about it."

---

Conclusion:

In Diamonds in the Rough: Dying for Sex & Jacuzzi Jets, Teddi Mellencamp and Tamra Judge navigate the complexities of relationships, health challenges, and personal growth with authenticity and humor. Their candid discussions offer valuable insights into maintaining intimacy, supporting loved ones, and embracing one's sexuality amidst life's trials. This episode serves as a testament to the resilience of the human spirit and the enduring power of open communication.

Transcript

[Tamara Judge]

This is Tamara Judge from Two T's.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

In a Pod with Teddy Mellencamp and Tamara Judge. Symbiotica is one of the most transparent brands out there.

[Tamara Judge]

They never compromise on quality and sourcing. Their products are free from seed oils, preservatives, toxins, or artificial additives. It's something you can taste and feel in every packet.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Go to symbiotica.com teapot for 20 off plus free shipping.

[Tamara Judge]

That's C Y M B I O.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

T I k a/t, t e A P O D. Symbiotica Wellness Made Simple.

[Dennis Black]

Ever notice your dog slowing down and having health issues and wonder, what can I do to make them better? Well, my friend, add rough greens to your dog's food for 90 days, and I guarantee you'll see changes that will amaze you. Greetings, naturopathic doctor Dennis Black, inventor of Ruff greens here, and I invite you to give your pup the Ruff Greens 90 day challenge. In the first 30 days, you'll see shinier coats and increased energy. By day 60, your dog will have a stronger immune system, less shedding, improved joint function, all due to the live nutrients that you've added to their diet. And at 90 days, better digestion, reduced inflammation, improved heart health, and you may even have reduced their cancer risk. Fetch your dog a free Jumpstart trial bag today. Go to try roughgreens.com. use promo code. Try rough. That's T, R, Y R U F F. Go to try rough greens dot com. Use promo code. Try rough. You just cover the shipping. You don't have to change your dog's food to improve your dog's health. Just add a scoop of rough greens.

[Tamara Judge]

Hi, guys. Welcome to another episode of Diamonds in.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

The Rough with Teddy Mellencamp and Erika Jayne. Hey, honey.

[Tamara Judge]

I love that she just immediately starts laughing.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Hi, guys.

[Tamara Judge]

Welcome. Immediately. I'm like, well, you know what, though?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

It's nice to see you, and I'm happy to see you, and I enjoy our time together.

[Tamara Judge]

Well, me too. And that's why I put on Instagram. What are your questions for me and Erica? And all y'all cared about is our sex life.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Well, that's okay, though. So let's discuss it.

[Tamara Judge]

Well, we're gonna. We're gonna half discuss us, and we're gonna half discuss this new show that's on fx. It's called Dying for Sex with Michelle.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Williams, which I watched, I got in the first two and a half episodes.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, it gets a little dark after that. So the first two and a half episodes is what I think everybody can relate to whether you have cancer or not.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Right.

[Tamara Judge]

But it's about. Michelle Williams has cancer. It goes away. The season starts where she's in couples.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Therapy, which is not going well.

[Tamara Judge]

Not going well. Like, the husband's checking the phone. He's doing.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

He's just checked off.

[Tamara Judge]

He's doing all the wrong things. And her phone rings, and she looks at it and she's like, sorry, I have to take this. And it's her cancer doctor saying that her cancer is back in terminal.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yes.

[Tamara Judge]

And then we just watch everything unravel.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Literally. We watch her completely change her life. Right after that session. Right during that session, during the session, she just walks out.

[Tamara Judge]

Because I think this happens to people who are married, whether there's cancer.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I was gonna say the same thing or not. When she said, you know, I want somebody to touch me. Like, this is what happens whether you' Whether there's cancer or not in relationships, a lot of times, sex lives fall apart.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

And there's no sex, or there's one partner that's into it or not.

[Tamara Judge]

Or it just changes. If you don't speak up for what it is that you want or what it is that you're looking for, most likely your partner is going to do it wrong. And not just sex, but, like, intimacy or comfort.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

And there's also ebbs and flows in a marriage. Whether you feel closer, you feel pulled apart, whether it's. It's simple stress of time or finances or children, like, you know, marriage or partnerships, however you want to say it. They're very tough to. They require daily watering and weeding. It's a daily thing that you have to keep your eye on. And when you're busy with other things, you know, you pull apart. You become almost strangers living in the same house and sleeping in the same bed.

[Tamara Judge]

And then, like, even sex becomes, like, procedural. Okay, we do it this time and this time. But, like.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

But there are a lot more people that are living like that than. Than people in our cast. I mean, like, listen, it is very tough to keep something like that alive.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah. And you have to. Both people have to be willing to receive the information and give it and not be not.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Sounds so crazy. Like, not take it personal, but take it personal. Like, it's not an attack on you as a bad lover or anything like that. It's just, hey, I'm feeling this way. And I think also, too, there's something that's interesting about this show, is that women's sexual desires change as they mature and get older. And what you may have once thought was taboo or something, you know, when you get older, especially when you're my age. So I'm 53, almost 54. I've gone through menopause. But my, my sexual desires or my fantasies or whatever you want to say are completely different than they were in my 20s and 30s.

[Tamara Judge]

And also what it's going to take.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah. Which is not.

[Tamara Judge]

Which changes. Like for me, for example, after going through all of this, they've changed my medication.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Like I have a sex drive.

[Tamara Judge]

I have. I have a sex drive. It's really hard for me to.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah, yeah, I would imagine that. But that's also antidepressants as well. Like I found that. I found that when I first went on antidepressants, I was like, whoa, wait a minute.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, like it was. I mean, not to tmi, but like I even tried myself and I was like, this is fucking exhausting.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

It is.

[Tamara Judge]

This is exhausting. I can't be. I can't be doing this all the time.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No.

[Tamara Judge]

Well, I was on Amazon. Apparently this was right out of the hospital when I'm still in the hotel.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

You don't even remember this?

[Tamara Judge]

I don't. Apparently I'd purchased two. I gave one to my friend Brooke that came to visit and she's like, but you forgot the charger. I'm like, you can get another charger. This is the best there is, supposedly. But I never tried it there. I tried it the night before last and I was like, well, I can't do this again.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

So you didn't achieve.

[Tamara Judge]

I achieved, but I had to achieve it in a way that wasn't the way it was set up to achieve.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

So I used to have to like to watch porn and dating. Yeah, I know. And this is something that people don't want to discuss, but like I had to have multiple stimulus and it. In order for me to. And then I get into these sort of like non conventional sort of thought and you know, it just. My sexuality is really interesting.

[Tamara Judge]

But also, here's the problem I have with porn is like when I'm looking through it, I'm a very like visual person and if I find one of the people unattractive. Ruined.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Can I tell you something? I'm not looking at faces, I'm looking at body parts. Oh. I mean, I have this beautiful way of sectioning out something that like I'm looking at very specific things. Okay. So I'm not taking in the entire picture.

[Tamara Judge]

See, I'm taking an entire picture and then.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

And oftentimes there's no sound. I watch it without sound. My brain is down to, like, very specific things.

[Tamara Judge]

Well, one of the things she does on this show, which is so freaking hilarious to me. So they have a. They've been together for, I don't know, let's say it's seven years.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah, I think it is seven years, right? When shit falls apart.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, shit falls apart. She gets cancer for the first time, and he turns into, like, the caregiver, but, like, solely the caregiver.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

The martyred caregiver.

[Tamara Judge]

Like, okay, you're only gonna have green juice. Is that you? Granted. I'm like, let me get my diet Dr. Pepper really quick.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Can I tell you something? You can have a diet Dr. Pepper. You've earned the diet Dr. Pepper.

[Tamara Judge]

I ask my doctor everything now. It's like I'm his stalker. I'm like, am I allowed to do this? Am I allowed to have diet Dr. Pepper? Am I allowed to get a tattoo? He was like, you're having a lot of life changes. Yes. You're allowed to do these things, though.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I kind of like this doctor. I don't know who this is, but good for you. But are you thinking of getting tattoos?

[Tamara Judge]

I think I might be getting one tonight. It's one of my friend's birthdays.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Oh, my gosh.

[Tamara Judge]

But what I want to get everyone in my life is like, this is not a good idea, but I think it's hilarious.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

What?

[Tamara Judge]

So I want to get this cute little knife.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Okay.

[Tamara Judge]

So instead of when I'm annoyed at somebody, I can just go.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I don't. I don't find a problem with that.

[Tamara Judge]

I think it's cute.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I do, too.

[Tamara Judge]

I just have to. I'll send you the pictures of my cute little knives that I've chosen. But either way, that's probably. You know, it could be the tumors.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

It could be, but who cares?

[Tamara Judge]

My sister and I. I was going to say my sister and I discussed it over the Fourth of July, but I had the tumors that.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Well, you know what, though? Did you talk to your doctor about your personality changing or your thing or how you're during this time, or have they said anything about that? I mean, not that your personality has changed. First off, let me be super clear for anybody that wants to try to come for me right now, stop. So I'm just asking you, did they say anything about that?

[Tamara Judge]

Well, I've had appointments with. What are the doctors that give you medication?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Psychiatrists.

[Tamara Judge]

So psychiatrist versus therapist?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah.

[Tamara Judge]

And the psychiatrist was like, okay. So there's some things we need to talk through. You had massive brain surgery.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah.

[Tamara Judge]

You had tumors the size of plums in your head, and they had to take it out. And like, now part of. I said, I'm feeling sort of depressed.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah. Think. I mean, just on, like. I mean, I'm kind of down and effort here, so. Shit.

[Tamara Judge]

I'm like, I'm not. I'm not really feeling like I was.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Depressed and it didn't happen to me. What the fuck?

[Tamara Judge]

I was like, I'm feeling kind of depressed. And she's like, have you ever considered, like. Cause she's like, I'm talking to you, and I can see you losing your train of thought. And I'm like, yeah, because I don't even care what I'm saying.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No, I can imagine you don't.

[Tamara Judge]

My brain, you know? And so she suggested a medication. She thinks that there's something. You know, I took multiple tests, but she did give me a medication that's a bit of, like an upper. She said, you may not live on this forever, but let's try it out. Let's try it out. And it is.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

It's really changed.

[Tamara Judge]

It's really changed. And, like, to the point where some days I'm like, I'm not going to take it because I want to see how I do. And then I'm like, didn't do well.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Right. That's. I tried that, too. Like, I remember when. Obviously our situations are different, but I remember when I went on antidepressants and I was feeling good, and I was like, okay, I have this handled. And I went off, and I was like, no, I don't. No, I don't.

[Tamara Judge]

Well, and antidepressants are even trickier because you can't just stop those cold turkeys.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No, you can't. You have to wean yourself off of them.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah. So, I mean, who knows? We're figuring it out. I feel like every day I'm getting more with it.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I love that.

[Tamara Judge]

But I see parts of.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I saw so much of you in this. I'm so glad. And I'm glad that we spoke about this before we pop. Because I did ask Teddy. I said, how much of this can I talk to you about? Because I see so much of your journey in just these first couple of episodes and. And just knowing you, and. And I like when she has her inner monologue. I thought.

[Tamara Judge]

I thought that's exactly what I do. And I thought so. Thinking it. And then I'm like, should I say this out loud?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I think, you know what? At this point in Your life. You have the right to say anything you're fucking thinking.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, that.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

What do you hope? Why? Why not?

[Tamara Judge]

I have noticed my anxiety is a lot better. Like, I used to be very type A about everything, and now I'm like, yeah, whatever.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I think that's good, though. I mean, look, no one. If you spoke how you really feel about everything, no one hears. That's what everybody really wants to do, but they don't. They can't because of whatever they're thinking, you know, will happen. But I think you have full license to say whatever you think and feel. I mean that just for me, like, fucking say it, Teddy.

[Tamara Judge]

Well, there was a point where they get back from. Well, the second that she finds out she has cancer, which, oddly, the doctor is right next to where her therapist is, and she, like, runs away from her husband to find out, and then she calls her best friend, and her best friend's, like, hilarious disaster.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I love that. She goes, oh, my God. I'm just coming from rehearsal. Which I was like, I'm coming from rehearsal, too.

[Tamara Judge]

Hold on.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

We're making it all about me.

[Tamara Judge]

You're like, hold on. I feel it. Like, hold on.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I feel this.

[Tamara Judge]

I feel this is the difference between us. She's coming from rehearsal. I'm seeing it from the other side. But I. I saw parts of her where she's like, you know, we're gonna laugh this. We're gonna do that. We're gonna laugh this.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

We're gonna laugh right through this.

[Tamara Judge]

So those points you really appreciate when somebody says we, but then her husband comes down from. The doctor realizes what's going on, and he immediately, you know, st. Takes her soda away.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I didn't.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah. He's like, I made green juice for at home.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

You can't have that.

[Tamara Judge]

You can't have this. We need to change this, and blah, blah, blah. And I'm all about, you know. But, like, if it's something you want to do, great. But I don't want to do something that somebody else that's not a doctor is telling me to do.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I agree with that. And I think that you're in a very. This is you. You know what I'm saying? Like, this is your body, your fight, your experience, your journey. All of us that are your friends or your family that are around you. Like, the only person that this is happening to is you.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah. But what you see is the husband completely takes it on as him.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Oh, yeah.

[Tamara Judge]

It takes over their whole life. He no longer can even have sex with her.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Well, that's the reason they're in couples therapy anyway. He won't touch her.

[Tamara Judge]

He won't touch her. He's scared he's gonna break her.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah. And she's had the double mastectomy and. And then that throws her into this really crazy space because what are you supposed to do? I mean, look, nobody really knows. I mean, I can only speculate what you're going through, but this is. This is your right to feel, in my opinion, however you want to fucking feel.

[Tamara Judge]

And I mean, I think so many people have come to me and been like, so what does this mean for you and Edwin? Because you got cancer?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

It's none of your fucking business is what I'm like.

[Tamara Judge]

One, it's none of your fucking business. And two, we're in a good, safe place. That's the best for our kids right now.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

How about this? It's a day to day thing. And we're doing good today.

[Tamara Judge]

We're doing good today. And for the first time, we're having conversations we never had.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Probably the hard ones that you wish.

[Tamara Judge]

You could have and laughing good. And kind of saying like this. It's not. I don't think that we will get back together. I think it doesn't matter. But I don't think everything needs to be figured out this week while I'm still in immunotherapy and we have kids at the house.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

How about this? No way. Like, you need to live present in the moment, and you need to do what's right for you. And fuck these outside voices. And I would have done you.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, my dad every. He calls every day.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I love that.

[Tamara Judge]

And some days I'm all worked up and some days I'm pretty chill. And he's like, just be cool. Just be cool.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Come on.

[Tamara Judge]

I'm like, you know, when has anyone ever said that I'm cool? That is not something me.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah, but it's the new you.

[Tamara Judge]

He's like, just be cool.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I agree with.

[Tamara Judge]

You don't have to make.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

You don't have to do anything. This is not the time to be making these crazy decisions.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah. He's like, just be cool. You guys are fine right now. You're not having. You're not sharing a bed. You're not doing this. You're. You're both allowed to date, right? Like, do what you want to do. Be safe, I think. Yeah.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

As long as. Exactly. Be safe and be smart. But other than that, like, it's no one's lives but yours.

[Tamara Judge]

Like, it's between you two and we have and we finally had to have the conversation where I was like, listen, I know you're different than me. Like, you don't want to hear the information. I want every crumb.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Do you really?

[Tamara Judge]

I need every crumb.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Has that. You've always been that way.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, but I like, I mean, if you were to tell me about a guy right now, I'd be like, can I see his picture? Not because I want to be an. But because, like, you just need to.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Know the entire thing.

[Tamara Judge]

If not, I'm gonna make up in my head what he looks like. I need every single detail.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Overactive brain. I thought that medication was supposed to help with that.

[Tamara Judge]

Don't worry.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Listen, let me talk to the psychiatrist.

[Tamara Judge]

Because you like, I'm like, hey, no, no, no, no, no, no. I want to see. I see that you cropped that. I uncrop it.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

That is so.

[Tamara Judge]

I like every. And I don't have jealousy. It's the crazy.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No, I don't. I've never seen you as a jealous person. As. I've never seen you as a jealous person.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, like, I don't have jealousy. I don't know.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No, I think you're just into like, you. You like information.

[Tamara Judge]

And if I'm gonna be friends with somebody.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah, you want to be full on friends.

[Tamara Judge]

Like, I want to know the good, the bad and the ugly.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I think you don't like it when friends conceal. You know, like when. Hold on. There are levels of friends and your inner circle of friends, which is what I'm talking about. I think you really appreciate transparency because you are transparent with your friends.

[Tamara Judge]

Like, I can't take it. I'm like, no, give me more details. It's fine.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Like, I wish I had some details to give you.

[Tamara Judge]

Well, I'm sure you do.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I have nothing to share at the moment, but I am hoping, like I said last time, like two weeks ago, like, I gotta get. I have to get social and I cannot. I'm such a scaredy cat. I am so afraid of putting myself out there.

[Tamara Judge]

Why? What's the worst that's going to happen?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I don't know the worst that's going to happen. Let me see. Well, I have a. I have an idea about myself post divorce that is not healthy. Meaning that I think that everyone's out to hurt me.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, but you're gonna need one good person.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Trust. It's really about trust. And I feel that, like, oh my God, like everybody's going to hurt me and not in a. It just. I can't relax into meeting New people. And I've always been kind of like a loner anyway. And so this is certainly put me into a position that I feel like is just like.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, I think it's. I mean, I think of. You say those things about yourself, but as being your friend, you're one of the most comfortable. Like, you're comforting, you're easygoing. Like, you take the pressure off as a friend that you have to do that to yourself.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Maybe that. Well, that's a good point.

[Tamara Judge]

It's like, you don't have to be perfect.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No, it's not that. I just. I think I have to be a little bit more comfortable in my own skin, trusting people and just opening up. And I think that that's a lot of it is just being brave enough to open up a bit.

[Tamara Judge]

Well, you were pretty badly burned.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yes, I think so. And then. And then, you know, it's continued on and in other ways as well. And so when that happens, you just become a little gun shy, you know, and so you don't know if people really want to get to know you or, you know, what. Where is this going? And what is this? You know, some.

[Tamara Judge]

I mean, I think as we. I mean, I felt, you know, they did this thing in Us Weekly where they said that I'm date. I've. I dated two guys or whatever it was. And then I saw some. Some of the messages were like, yeah, go girl. And some were like, what the hell is wrong with this woman? It. Doesn't she want to spend time with her kids?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Of course you spend time with your kids.

[Tamara Judge]

Why would this even be a concern?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Because it is. You're a human being and you're allowed to live.

[Tamara Judge]

And I think something that I want to say, if you are going through anything like this, of course, every moment that I possibly can, I want to be there for my kids.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

You are.

[Tamara Judge]

But you know what? They sleep.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

And you don't. So there's that.

[Tamara Judge]

They sleep. And I'm on insomnia and I'm also on medication that keeps me awake, I'm sure.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah.

[Tamara Judge]

So I'm not going to nightclubs and meeting strangers.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Oh, Jesus Christ. We're not acting like doing putting dangerous shit.

[Tamara Judge]

But I have learned like, so where your insecurity comes more from people hurting you? My insecurity comes from more. And this is when I realized, like, am I shallow? Like, I will be like, I look like this now? Or this is how I feel right now, or do they notice these things?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I'm telling you what, you look pretty fucking awesome.

[Tamara Judge]

Well, I'm in full glam right now, I can assure you.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

When I'm so can. I can assure you. But you know what, though? That. That. Let me tell you something. Something. So what? You're a human being going through, like, a massive thing in your life, and I think you should, you know, do whatever makes you happy. Because I know you and I know that you're not putting yourself at risk.

[Tamara Judge]

And I'm not putting. I'm not lying. Like, we have a calendar where I put, like, Monday this Da da da. This Wednesday. You know, like, that way there's never a point where Edwin has to be like, Teddy's trying to, you know, we all live in the same house together.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I just saw him downstairs. Yeah, I just gave him a hug after his workout.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah. Like, it's. We all live in the same house together. How we want to communicate what the other. What we're doing is different. Like, I'll be like, oh, yeah, and I'm going on a date.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Like, it is what it is, y'all.

[Tamara Judge]

And he doesn't have to do the same for me. I do assume when he puts a leather jacket on and leaves at 7:30pm.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

And come, does he come back?

[Tamara Judge]

No, he doesn't come home those nights.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I knew it.

[Tamara Judge]

And then I make the assumption and. But I'm such an ass. I'll be like, have fun tonight, you. So he's like, what do you mean? I'm just heading to the place where you're staying. I'm like, sure you are, buddy.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Sure you are. Have fun.

[Tamara Judge]

Your hair looks good.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah, you look a little too good to be just going to the place area.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah. I can assure you when I'm heading over to Kyle's, I'm a pair of sweats.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Oh, off. Are you using that as an excuse?

[Tamara Judge]

No, but if I'm in sweats, I'm going to Kyle's.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Well, yeah, I would use Kyle as a total excuse to do anything. I'm at Kyle's.

[Tamara Judge]

But that being said, I am going to see Kyle tonight. But I really am seeing Kyle. She's home. Jen is she birthday? Yes.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Oh, she's home. I need to give her a text.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Are you guys having a birthday party tonight for her?

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, for Jen.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Lovely.

[Tamara Judge]

Who? Jen is the one that pretty much nursed me back to life.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

She really did.

[Tamara Judge]

She really did.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

She's awesome.

[Tamara Judge]

She's amazing. We call her Jen. Jen does. Jen knows everything like that. You ask any question, Jen's like, oh, yeah, of course.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Now Jen's pretty Amazing.

[Tamara Judge]

She's. She's great. Time is precious and so are our pets. So time with our pets is extra precious. That's why we started Dutch. Dutch provides 24. 7 access to licensed vets with unlimited virtual visits and follow ups for up to five pets. You can message a vet at any time and schedule a video visit the same day. Our vets can even prescribe medication for many ailments and shipping is always free. With Dutch, you'll get more time with your pets and year round peace of mind when it comes to their vet care. Okay, so anyways, I said there's all this press about Dorit.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Oh, I see it right here. Who's who? Yeah. What is who?

[Tamara Judge]

He's Zac Efron's brother. He was on.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Who's that?

[Tamara Judge]

Who's. He's Zac Efron's brother. Hot. He was on this past traitors. Oh, why haven't we been on?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Well, I was asked the first season, but I was in no mental shape to go.

[Tamara Judge]

Well, I feel like I'm in good mental shape right now.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Probably fucking win. Let me tell you something. You want to talk about laying everybody out? You probably fucking win. I would go with you just to, like, watch you can me and Erica go.

[Tamara Judge]

I need Erica.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I don't even know, just in case.

[Tamara Judge]

I get a little stumbling.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No, I will help you. Yeah, I will help you lay out everything.

[Tamara Judge]

Well, everyone would think that you were a traitor.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Oh, of course they would.

[Tamara Judge]

I'm like, not knowing girl next door.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I know. And then we could flip these roles. Yeah, this is what the truth will come. You got the villains all wrong. I'm actually a sweet person. But you guys are insistent that I'm a villain.

[Tamara Judge]

I'm on the dark side.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

And this one over here, we already know how you roll.

[Tamara Judge]

But anywho, Dorit made a comment, which, by the way, I already made fun of on the other pod, but it was like over a sentence long about this guy Dylan's.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

She. She likes words.

[Tamara Judge]

She does. Like, she needed less words. She could have just done the fire or, as my kids have taught me, like Riz.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Oh, you mean as in charisma.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, like anything, but it was a full sentence.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

But that's Dorit. You know, she loves. She likes words.

[Tamara Judge]

He probably yawned.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Well, probably. Well, whatever.

[Tamara Judge]

Dorit, less words on your flirting. Oh, my God.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

We've been trying to do this for a decade. It's not working. We've known this woman for a decade and it's. But Dylan doesn't so quickly. So Your libido? Yes. No. Maybe I just got my. I'll ask you. I'll tell you why. I just got my hormones implanted yesterday, and they go right in your glutes. And I'm going to tell you right now, it's a little like.

[Tamara Judge]

Are you all horned up?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Not yet. But I said to her, I was like, look, I got zero libido today. But, like, this last week, I'm like, who am I? So I said, you know, like, give me some libido. She said, not a problem.

[Tamara Judge]

Well, here's the problem for me.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

You have too much libido. No, but I'm also afraid. I know me, like, my. My libido, like, I will start getting on this phone, and it'll be a disaster.

[Tamara Judge]

I. Well, I remember you're the last time that I was with you when you took the libido meds. I don't know what they were, but we were in Santa Barbara. You didn't want to leave the room because you were. You were busy.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I was busy.

[Tamara Judge]

She was busy. I was like, I'm not fighting with Denise alone again. Get your ass in here.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No, I don't think so.

[Tamara Judge]

Get a good one and come out.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I was masturbating, which I do a lot.

[Tamara Judge]

I apparently needed a lesson. Not from you. Everyone calm down.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah, no, but.

[Tamara Judge]

No, they're talking a lot about why Molly. Who?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

That's Michelle's character.

[Tamara Judge]

Michelle's character is so horny, after she leaves her husband. She's been trying to have sex with her husband.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Three years.

[Tamara Judge]

For three years, and he won't. And then they kind of start to. And then he, like, pushes her off. Yeah.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I'm not shocked. Men are weird.

[Tamara Judge]

Ugh. It gave me the ick.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

It gave me the.

[Tamara Judge]

But then she made. Listen, guys, if you want to go on the world Wide Web to masturbate. The mistake she made almost pushed me over the edge. So she goes on. She thinks she's watching. Let's just call him Max. She thinks she's watching Max masturbate so she can masturbate, too.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

So it's kind of like they're doing it together, but he, in fact, records her and then holds her hostage for money.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah. So then after she's done, she sees a picture of herself, like.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah, kind of like. Yeah. But, you know, it's funny. He goes, I paid him in Bahamian dollars. It's like.

[Tamara Judge]

So at the end of the day, she has to call her husband and says, I'm being held hostage from a porn. I Recorded on myself.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yes. And he, you know, this makes me like this character, meaning her husband. Because he helped.

[Tamara Judge]

He did.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Okay, I don't want to see you like this. Like this, given the money problem.

[Tamara Judge]

But then he, Then he kept going. He didn't just leave.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No, he. He kept going.

[Tamara Judge]

Then he shamed her.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

He shamed her for it. Yeah. And this is like, okay, let's just. Yeah, let's not do that.

[Tamara Judge]

Like you. I haven't watched the full. The full season, but I think a PSA to anybody that wants to get back together with a partner, whether it's they're dying or they're, you know, just they had a bunch of kids and shits hit the fan, it's like, quit making it about you.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yep. Quit making it about you.

[Tamara Judge]

Quit making it about you. I listened to something. I mean, listen to self help these days, guys. That's the level. That's the level.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Do you know that? That's all that plays in my home is like meditation and self help and realization and all that, Because I just. I feel like I need it.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, apparently we need it. Well, I was listening to Mel Robbins and she said, who. I don't necessarily always love the long stuff, but when she has little clips. So it was a clip about how when you want your partner to change and you continuously give them advice or tips or like, provide over information, it makes your partner want to change less.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I agree with that.

[Tamara Judge]

Like, quit shoving it down my throat.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Well, I also think that they, they're reminded of their mothers. Like, everybody thinks that, like, you know, you're mothering them and they, they turn. It gets turned off, like really quickly.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, but from a guy especially, what is your thought on men being very close with their mothers?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I think there's a limit. I think that. Well, I think when a mother oversteps their boundary in a grown man's life. I'm not talking about a child. In a grown man's life. You know, I think that you have to separate from your mom and be your own person. It's great to have a close relationship with your mother, but you also have to be your own person.

[Tamara Judge]

Well, yeah. Slate says that no matter what the situation is, I will always pick Cruz.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

And where is this coming from?

[Tamara Judge]

Well, because the other night we were watching. Well, now I really have to second guess myself.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Wait a second. No, slate's 12.

[Tamara Judge]

Slate's 12.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Well, we already know what this is. Well, think about when Teddy was 12, fighting with her mom.

[Tamara Judge]

You think she's going through the curse?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Fuck Yeah, I know. Erica, 12 fighting with Renee. I'm 53, and I still fight with that woman. Well, listen, I do. I'm just telling you, mothers and daughters, butt heads. Mothers and sons. That's a love affair.

[Tamara Judge]

Well, that. That's where we're getting.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah.

[Tamara Judge]

So we're watching Bad Robot, which now in the last three months, I've cried in two robot movies. Okay, well, that's a. The Jennifer Lopez robot movie. That had to have been the two.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

She made a robot. Okay.

[Tamara Judge]

Sorry, I didn't know I cried in that. And then I cried in Bad Robot. And Slate got up to go to the restroom, and she was cuddling with me. But Slate cuddles kind of in a love you Slate.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Like a Teddy way.

[Tamara Judge]

Like, it's like falling on you way.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Oh, she's like, overly. Oh, she's laying on you.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, like, laying on you.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Well, they get bigger and it's. It's like, yeah, now she's taller than me. Yeah, you're heavy.

[Tamara Judge]

And so. And it's like very, like. And I'm like. I'm like having hot and cold flashes. And then Cruz, when Slate got up to go to the restroom, he jumped right in and snuggled in perfectly with his little arm. And. And Slate came out and she was like, mom, you let him in again. And I was like, only for 10 minutes. But now I realize I am that person. That's okay.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

That's okay. I know you love your children.

[Tamara Judge]

I love them all equally, but sometimes different ones annoy me at different times.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

You know, I'm an only child, and I only have one child, so I have no experience in this area. So I can't tell you whether parents have favorites or children that they connect with more, but I would imagine. I'm imagining that there are kids, like, certain ones of your kids that you connect with on different levels. Like, I connect with this one in this way or, you know, there.

[Tamara Judge]

And there's different things. I'm like, Slate, I would lay down and die for you tomorrow and do anything to be at every single event you're at. Like, I would do anything.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I think you have our.

[Tamara Judge]

Our thing. We like to do these certain things together. Like, our thing may not be cuddling, right?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Your thing may. Yeah. And I think. But. But she's also 12.

[Tamara Judge]

She's, you know, I know she knows all the words.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

She.

[Tamara Judge]

She asked me to if I want to see her hauls.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

What.

[Tamara Judge]

Which I absolutely don't.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

What is that?

[Tamara Judge]

That's when you go shopping at Addictive.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

A Hall H A U, L. Yeah.

[Tamara Judge]

Do I want to see her haul? No, I don't. I already paid for it.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Like her Sephora haul.

[Tamara Judge]

Yes.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

They're into skincare, these kids.

[Tamara Judge]

More better. I'm like, go into my drawer and take all. Every single thing that someone sent me. But anyways, back to dying for sex.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

So what's your most adventurous sexual fantasy? Yeah, kind of like that. Yeah, I already said what mine was weeks ago. Remember? I said multiples.

[Tamara Judge]

Multiples. I think the more that I think about it now is like, I've been trying to figure out what it is that I really like and what I don't like. And what. What I've realized is if I'm.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Have you had a lot of sexual partners?

[Tamara Judge]

I mean, I've had more than 10.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah, I blew way past that.

[Tamara Judge]

No, no. Shit.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

God.

[Tamara Judge]

I've had Body Counter, but she's got a high body count. But not high body count. Hair.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No, no.

[Tamara Judge]

What is wig hair considered for body counts? Who would even know?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

It's fabulous. That's what we're going with.

[Tamara Judge]

So anyways, this could be a newer, old person. We'll just. You guys gather what you want, but it's figuring out, like, I like this or I don't like this.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

So you have, like, a. Someone like a partner that you're really discovering things with.

[Tamara Judge]

Correct.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Oh, my God. That's wonderful.

[Tamara Judge]

Yes, that is. Okay. Discovery.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

That's wonderful. Yeah. So it's cool when you have that type of back and forth and, like, you can just try things and you feel comfortable enough to do them. Yeah.

[Tamara Judge]

And then being like that actually wasn't it for me, but I can tell maybe it was it for you.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Well, then that's where you switch off, you know? Like, I know you really like this, and I really like that. So let's do this. And then.

[Tamara Judge]

So here's the moral of the story, guys, is have conversations, talk about it.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah. I think the more relaxed and open you are, the easier it is to have these conversations. And it really is like, that's how you're gonna get the best sex life.

[Tamara Judge]

Is communicating and faking it.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Don't do that.

[Tamara Judge]

Doesn't do anything for anybody. I'm gonna tell you. I'm not even bother with faking it.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No. No.

[Tamara Judge]

Not even. Not even a little nothing. It's a zip.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I Look. It should have never had to, but yes. Certainly not now.

[Tamara Judge]

No, no, no, no. So then we get into parts that I don't necessarily relate to, but Molly is trying. Molly has never had an orgasm. I. I have pre cancer. I had orgasms. Not.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I said, I have them now. I fixed my problem.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, I'm not.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Can I tell you something? I remember having orgasms really young.

[Tamara Judge]

I feel like I do too.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Like, really.

[Tamara Judge]

Like. Is this inappropriate to say? But like, with the. With the jacuzzi thing.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah, I love a jet.

[Tamara Judge]

I used to tell people about it.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Oh, yeah, Love the jacuzzi jets. Everybody knows what that is. The jacuzzi jet was like nine or ten.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, Jacuzzi jet. I was like, no, no, I'll get in the koozie jet.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I'll get in the Jacob by myself in these weird positions. Why are you. Wait, my back hurts.

[Tamara Judge]

Hold on. I'm in a one piece, right?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Hold on, hold on. Oh, yeah, the jacuzzi jets. Like anything I could get my hands on.

[Tamara Judge]

But the problem is I don't think a jacuzzi jet would work for me these days.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

It's a water.

[Tamara Judge]

I feel like I'd be getting UTIs left and right.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

We probably did just don't remember that part.

[Tamara Judge]

We just don't know.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No, a lot of girls know about the jacuzzi jets.

[Tamara Judge]

Listen, the jacuzzi. If you had a friend who had a house that had a jacuzzi, you knew what you were doing and it was warm. You knew what you were gonna go do.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

You knew what you were doing and. Shit. Let's go to Kyle's.

[Tamara Judge]

Hey, Kyle, it's Betty and Erica. Can you go ahead and turn on the heat and the Jacuzzi.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Can you turn on the heat? And the jacuzzis will be right over. You said over there. That's what we ought to do in time ourselves.

[Tamara Judge]

How long it takes each of us with the jet.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yes.

[Tamara Judge]

What if I took the longest? That might be because I don't get to have the. Since I had the cancers, I don't get to have all my hormones I used to have. Yeah, I know. So I had to really get inside my head.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

That's really where you have to start going, is inside your head.

[Tamara Judge]

Which is why.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Do you think I will? I do certain things to trick myself into it. Yeah, but.

[Tamara Judge]

Well, now I know this whole thing about porn not looking at people's faces. I mean, I got so desperate the other day. I was like, maybe I should porn. I was like, I guess I'll watch the Kim Kardashian one. And then I got into it. I was like, I can't have sex. I mean, I can't during this.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No, that's not a. That's not one that we need to.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, well, it was readily available.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah, but you need to do. You need to do specific searches on things that you're into and then you will get the material that will help you achieve that. I'm not.

[Tamara Judge]

Oh gosh.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

It's all about tricking yourself into certain visuals.

[Tamara Judge]

Well, another part that we get into is that Michelle Williams character gets really into controlling men and that's what actually gets her off for the first time.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I think that a lot of women could relate to that, quite honestly.

[Tamara Judge]

Controlling. And what do you like that? Are you one of those women that relate to that?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Not really. I mean I like back and forth. I don't think that that's something I think it. It would be interesting to explore. I followed this one dominatrix on TikTok. Like I like the idea of it, but maybe not in a personal sense. Like. Yeah, like I think how she does it, which is a client based service. Okay. But not in my personal, personal relationships. That's not something that I need to have happen.

[Tamara Judge]

No. But I like.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I like surrendering. I like feeling.

[Tamara Judge]

Me too.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I like feeling.

[Tamara Judge]

I like feeling not small in like a physical way, but like this person is in control.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I like feeling, for lack of a better word, feminine. I know it's soft and I think.

[Tamara Judge]

Not like we have the voices that we have.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Right. And not that we're not the. That we are raging.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah. I was like, you know, here's the thing.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I would like to. And I think that, you know, you and I live these lives where we are perceived one way and that's fine. But in a personal relationship or in an intimate relationship, I don't want to be that. I want to be soft and you know. Yeah.

[Tamara Judge]

I want to feel, dare I say this guys. Loved.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah.

[Tamara Judge]

Loved and cared for and like this person would do anything for me, but also has enough going on for themselves.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Well, I don't even get that far. Like I'm just talking about the moment of intimacy. Like when you talk about intimate moments, I would like to feel cared for and loved and then a little bit of like. I mean in moments and then the other moments I'd like to feel some dirty shit.

[Dennis Black]

But.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tamara Judge]

But I think that can all kind of work together.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

It does.

[Tamara Judge]

But she on the other hand, you know, pretends to be a dog and pees on somebody. But her radiation is apparently can't get on the person's. So there's like.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Is that a real thing?

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, like when I go to get radiation.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah.

[Tamara Judge]

I'M always like, why can't you know? Most of the time it's Jen with me. I'm like, why can't Jen come in? And she's like, you're radioactive.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

You are radioactive.

[Tamara Judge]

That being said, I haven't. Damn it. I missed the opportunity because now I'm done with radiation. I didn't try to pee on anybody after.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Well, I don't know.

[Tamara Judge]

Can I get. Can you come over here and give me a quick radiation? I'm going to pee on Erica and see what happens.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Please do not pee on me now. I may have peed on some people, but I'm not radioactive.

[Tamara Judge]

Have you ever squirted?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. The squirt thing is just another way of having an orgasm. Well, can you?

[Tamara Judge]

Yes.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I love that.

[Tamara Judge]

I love it.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I love it.

[Tamara Judge]

I could do it, but, I mean, it takes a certain time.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Okay, let's. It takes a certain time. I was telling someone this the other day. I was like, look, this takes a certain setup and a certain level of relaxation.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

And then it's like the water hose is open.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah. Then. But if you try to do it.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Too quick, it does not work.

[Tamara Judge]

It won't work.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

It won't work.

[Tamara Judge]

It's flawed.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

It is flawed. And it has to be a certain.

[Tamara Judge]

A certain angle. So if you're listening and you think that you can't squirt, you can. Because the way I did for the first time, I actually made a bet and said, I know I can't. Oh, I know I can't. And then all of a sudden, seven minutes later, I was like, that must be what that is.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

So I bought a book many years ago because I was fascinated by this. So like 15 years ago, I bought this book from this place called Coco d'amur. It's not open anymore, and I used to buy all.

[Tamara Judge]

So you're screwed if you want any sexual.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

So I used to buy all of this erotica, and I actually want to write some erotica because I think it'd be fun for me and I have a wild imagination.

[Tamara Judge]

Would you use a stage name?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Oh, I just write it as Erika Jayne. Why not?

[Tamara Judge]

Let's do this. I want. I want to do. I want you to do it.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Okay.

[Tamara Judge]

So I can read it. I just recently learned some things.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

So, yeah, no, I think I should do it. And I bought this book about squirting, and I read through it and read through it and read through it, like, all the biology and how you do this and stuff and stuff. And so at first, I did it. By myself. Like, I made myself do it.

[Tamara Judge]

You can make yourself do it.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I had learned how to do it.

[Tamara Judge]

Did you have nails on?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No, I did not. No, not. No, no, no. But I learned how to make myself do it. And then years later, I did it with a partner.

[Tamara Judge]

Did you have to teach the partner? He.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No, the partner taught me a lot. I already had. I said, look, I can do this by myself, but I've never done it with a partner. The partner taught me. And then.

[Tamara Judge]

And, yeah, it's pretty great, guys. It's worth the.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

But it is. It is worth it. I mean, it is a different type of release. It really is.

[Tamara Judge]

Like, you feel very relaxed, very afterwards.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

And I always knew I could do it because I always had to pee after I had an orgasm.

[Tamara Judge]

Me, too. Well, which you're actually supposed to do.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

That's exactly.

[Tamara Judge]

But I have to pee. Even if there's. Even. I don't have an orgasm. I immediately have to pee before restarting happens.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah, I. There's a lot of. There's a lot to that. And I'm sure, like, look, the medical profession thinks that, you know, this is. We're all.

[Tamara Judge]

They think it's pee, but it's not. I. I went deep down the rabbit hole. It's clear.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

It's clear. And it has no smell, no taste.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah. I mean, I didn't taste it.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I did. I did it all. I needed to. I did it all. Especially when I was making myself do it. At first, I needed to know exactly what was happening. And then I had this partner who really. We did it together. And now I can.

[Tamara Judge]

Really leaned into it.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Really leaned into it. And it was great.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah. So, guys, experiment. Try new things. Don't wait till you're. You know the stories about you on fx, you're dying for sex. You're having to try things for the first time in a panicked way.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yeah. Like maybe I was gonna say something this real. When I was watching this, I was like, my God, this is tiny.

[Tamara Judge]

Like, you don't want to be in that situation. And I think so many of us are so scared to open up or talk about what we want or need or what feels good or what doesn't, that you end up missing your whole life. And that goes for everything in life.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No matter what you're doing.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Or what you're facing.

[Tamara Judge]

Like, there's things in my life that I'm like, shit, I never did that.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

What?

[Tamara Judge]

Just like.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Like what?

[Tamara Judge]

Annoying, dumb shit.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Like, should we do it now?

[Tamara Judge]

I mean, it's not Great. It's to clean out my drawers in the cabinet.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Damn. I thought you were going to say something cool like go to Tibet. Let's.

[Tamara Judge]

Let's go out of town somewhere.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I'll fudgeing go with you.

[Tamara Judge]

But I can't wear heels, so. What?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I. It would be a break not to wear heels.

[Tamara Judge]

Okay, great. If we can commit to going somewhere not.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Let's go somewhere, like, on an adventure where, like, we really.

[Tamara Judge]

But I don't want to have to be itchy.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Itchy?

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah. Like, I don't want to have to deal with bugs.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I don't want. I don't want to do that either.

[Tamara Judge]

Okay, great.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Are you allowed to travel? Like, what is your limitations?

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, I'm allowed to do anything. I'm allowed to do anything. I thought I wasn't allowed to do anything, and things got a little dark around here.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Sure.

[Tamara Judge]

And then I just. Now every time I have a question, I send them a text, and immediately he writes back. I'm like. He's like, I cursed the day I gave that woman my.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No, he doesn't. He'd much rather hear from you and have you happy and doing. Being.

[Tamara Judge]

But then he's like, hilarious. Then he asks questions. What's the tattoo gonna be? And I'm like, I am not writing back a knife.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Right. I wanna. I'm gonna ask you a question. Is there anything that we, your friends, can do better to support you right now with cancer? Yeah. I mean. Cause I'll be honest with you, people are listening. And oftentimes we, as friends, don't know the best way to support someone like you. And we make it about ourselves, or we start to cry, or we get upset. And I'm wondering, what can you tell me as your friend or maybe others that are listening to help people that are where you are?

[Tamara Judge]

I think if you truly have a question, you want to help, you have to listen to what the person says, like, what you do. So one of the biggest things that I've struggled with since, and which I'm struggling with these lights right now.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Is it hurting you?

[Tamara Judge]

Not terribly, but your eyeballs. But my eyeballs get really sore, so I'm not. I don't love to text. Like, texting used to be my thing.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No, I know. Now we send audio.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah. So I told Erica and Dorit, actually, they were like, what's the best way to communicate? And I said, please, just voice text me. I can't read. It's. I mean, I can read. It's just a pain. And then I don't want to do it.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

It hurts.

[Tamara Judge]

So just listening to that and sending, like, my sister sent her first voice note of all time, and she's like, hey, period. It's justice, period. Just wanted a. Caught the. The amount of time I made fun of her after, like, that gave me so much joy. I said, you said a fucking comma on the voice note, girl. Like, don't. You don't need to put a comma.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

It's your. It's a recording.

[Tamara Judge]

It's your recording of your voice. And now she'll. Now it's her new favorite thing. Now I'm like, I'm about to take this feature away from you.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Because now she's just voice.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah. Now it could be anything. It could be 27 minutes long.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Well, Dorit's remember, Dorit's went on for two minutes. I was like, girl, we're just trying to. I love you, dorit, but, you know.

[Tamara Judge]

If we have to hold pressure twice.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Yes.

[Tamara Judge]

And then again to get through your voice note, I'm not listening to the whole thing.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

It's a lot, I think, but. So voice notes are good, what, under a minute. Under a minute. So what?

[Tamara Judge]

Voice notes are good under a minute. Something that has been really helpful. And people are gonna be like, oh.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Wow, you have money.

[Tamara Judge]

That's just so stupid. But people kept asking, jen, what should we do for Teddy? And she was like, listen, you know, she has a lot of kids. She's used to preparing dinner every night for everybody, right? So there's like a. It's called the food train.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

What is that?

[Tamara Judge]

And you sign up for a night and you have dinner delivered to the family at 5:00.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Oh, that's nice.

[Tamara Judge]

So the cool thing, I thought you.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Were gonna say, somebody came and cook. I was like, girl, don't ask me. These kids will be starving.

[Tamara Judge]

No, that's super expensive. But no. And so it's. The cool thing for me is, like, I am such a creature of habit. I normally would eat the same. Same thing every day. Get, like, rotate between four options for the kids. This way it's a different person sending you food. And, you know, I don't do weekends, so we can go out and stuff like that. But it's been really nice. Like, I can expect it. It comes. It utilizes the entire family.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

And I guess it really, like, frees you up to do other things. That's.

[Tamara Judge]

I'm really. I was like, making me feel guilty because at 4:00's, like, when I get really tired and I'm like, oh, no, I need to. What am I getting at? Gymnastics. And then I gotta get. Blah, blah, blah. And then I gotta get food. But now I come home from whatever afternoon event the kids have or dinner's ready, dinners sitting there, and I'm like.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I need to sign up for you.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, that's been really nice. The food train.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

The food train. And I think not making it about us.

[Tamara Judge]

Not making it about us and the food train and telling people what you actually want.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

There's no better time than the present.

[Tamara Judge]

But, guys, for next week, because now, you know, I think that I'm coming back together a little bit more. We want to hear what you want me and Erica to speak about. What topics? What things? Yes, we. Of course we can talk about sex forever.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

But that's kind of boring too. Like, we said a lot today and. Okay, whatever, we're freaks. But.

[Tamara Judge]

Hold on, I have a new business venture for us.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Oh, my God, what is it? Creamer.

[Tamara Judge]

More creamer. Jets, Jacuzzi jets. Just little cute portable jets.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

You know what? I think it said the medicine is getting to your brain. You know what?

[Tamara Judge]

Listen, a portable jet could look like a little foot massager.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

It has to have a water source, right?

[Tamara Judge]

The foot massager where you put your feet in air. Now you're getting. You know what?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

What?

[Tamara Judge]

You're getting it. They're seeing it back there.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Have you ever done the jets on the Jacuzzi?

[Tamara Judge]

See? See, everyone?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Oh, yeah. Oh, the gays, too. Oh, does it get that prostate going?

[Tamara Judge]

Oh, I'm going to try that way.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Okay, I have to get filled up.

[Tamara Judge]

So, guys, send us a message. If you have tried out the Jacuzzi for more ways than a sore back.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

You'Ll have a sore back after it. You know what? I have the Jacuzzi at home, which I don't get in. Let me get that going. You know what?

[Tamara Judge]

That might be the time that I come over to visit. Hey, guys, we're 30 minutes late for the pod. Don't worry about it. We'll see you when we see you.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Oh, my God. You know, you have to laugh at this shit because you have to.

[Tamara Judge]

Oh, guys, I didn't mean to make that noise, but Cruz and I were very excited to see Erica on the Masked Singer. How good was she? Those were hard songs.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

They were hard songs. The costume was a lot. The costume weighed eight pounds. I mean, the head weighed about eight pounds. And so. And you can see very little. So it was wonderful. And I'll show you some BTs.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah, it was wonderful.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I had A great time.

[Tamara Judge]

You touched an excellent job.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Thank you. I had the best time.

[Tamara Judge]

Did you have any idea who anyone else was?

[Teddy Mellencamp]

No. I am telling you, this show, to everyone, the production, to costume, to dancers, to choreographer, everybody at Masked Singer, I just want to say this is the most fun show. And Method man was my neighbor, and I had no idea. And I'm a fan.

[Tamara Judge]

I love Method Man.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I'm a fan. And I. We had.

[Tamara Judge]

So you walked around like this. You never saw anybody.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

You walk around with gloves, a hoodie, a visor, and you do not speak and you have a handler, and they take you everywhere. And you are separated. Not really. They're suggested to you, and then you go with, I think, what best fits your vocal. Or the. There's nights, you know, so there's like, Grand Ole Opry night, or there was the Ghostbuster night. Or there's, you know, whatever night. And like, boy band night.

[Tamara Judge]

Yeah.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

So you have songs that you choose from that are obviously boy bands. And then you.

[Tamara Judge]

Well, Cruz guessed you night one, but unfortunately, he called you Erica James.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

That's fine. Erika James is good, too. Jenna Jameson. Erica James, whatever.

[Tamara Judge]

He goes, that's your friend, mom.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Whatever.

[Tamara Judge]

And I was like, who? And he's like, the one I thought was you the one day. Erika James.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

I love that. I love that. Go cruise. Go cruise.

[Tamara Judge]

I'm like, it's Jane.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

It doesn't matter, honey. Call me whatever the hell you want, whatever.

[Tamara Judge]

But I was really proud of you and I loved watching you.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Thank you. It was a great time. I had the best time.

[Tamara Judge]

Thanks, guys.

[Teddy Mellencamp]

Thank you.