Diamonds in the Rough: You Asked, Erika Spills

Summary

Podcast Summary: Two Ts In A Pod with Teddi Mellencamp and Tamra Judge
Episode: Diamonds in the Rough: You Asked, Erika Spills
Release Date: May 30, 2025

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Introduction

In this episode of Two Ts In A Pod hosted by Teddi Mellencamp and featuring Erika Jayne, listeners are treated to an intimate Q&A session where Erika opens up about her personal life, relationships, and experiences on reality television. The conversation delves deep into Erika's journey, offering candid insights and heartfelt reflections.

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Exploring Broadway Aspirations

The episode kicks off with a discussion about Erika's interest in Broadway shows. Teddi poses the question, “[03:52] Teddi Mellencamp: All right, so the first question is, what Broadway show? If you could pick any, would you want to do next?”

Erika Jayne responds enthusiastically, mentioning her interest in classics like "Cabaret" but expresses uncertainty about fitting into such roles:

“[04:00] Erika Jayne: Fuck. Okay. Okay. Cabaret. I don't know. Yeah, there's so many. I need to look, but that just, like, pops up.”

Teddi then suggests another favorite musical, leading to a lively exchange about “Gentlemen Prefer Blondes” and “Chorus Line,” highlighting Erika’s love for character-driven performances:

“[04:38] Teddi Mellencamp: Gentlemen prefer blondes. Or what's the one with tits and ass?”

---

Navigating the Dating Scene

A significant portion of the conversation centers around dating, relationships, and personal boundaries. Teddi asks Erika about her willingness to join a reality dating show:

“[05:14] Teddi Mellencamp: Would you go on the next season of Love Hotel? We want to see you dating.”

Erika Jayne shares her perspective on authentic connections versus televised relationships:

“[05:24] Erika Jayne: I would if they. I don't. I'm not opposed to it. It's just a matter of finding... somebody that I would actually spend time with and not for television.”

She emphasizes the importance of genuine interest and compatibility:

“[06:07] Teddi Mellencamp: And it seems like an enjoyable experience, then why not?

“[08:00] Erika Jayne: I'm at a different place in my life. So if I like you and I want to have sex with you, whether it's tonight, tomorrow, whenever, I'm going to be very upfront with that, and I have no shame in saying that.”

---

Personal Struggles and Resilience

Erika opens up about her tumultuous past, including her legal troubles and the challenges she faced during her marriage to Tom Girardi. When asked about moments she considered quitting the show, she reveals:

“[11:14] Erika Jayne: Yes, I wanted to. I sincerely thought about quitting during the worst of my legal troubles.”

Her determination to maintain control over her narrative is evident:

“[11:43] Teddi Mellencamp: What was the time frame?

“[11:45] Erika Jayne: It was during the worst of my legal troubles... I didn't want them to be in control of my life story.”

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Balancing Persona and Reality

The conversation shifts to the dichotomy between Erika’s public persona and her true self. Teddi probes into the differences between "Erika Jayne" and "Erica Girardi":

“[12:00] Teddi Mellencamp: How much of Erika Jane is still Erica Girardi when the cameras are off and can you explain this to people?”

Erika Jayne explains the concept of performance personas in reality TV:

“[12:25] Erika Jayne: It's like when I used to see my judge friends on the bench and they would be tough as fuck, and then they'd be like, fun.”

She further elaborates on the engineered reality of the show:

“[13:13] Teddi Mellencamp: But I think when you're on Beverly Hills, you're Erica Girardi.

“[13:17] Erika Jayne: Yes, but this is an engineered reality... it's all true. I wish that mine wasn't true. ...but it is, and it is very much reality.”

---

Memories and Personal Reflections

Erika shares cherished childhood memories, offering a glimpse into her early life and the relationship with her grandfather:

“[25:39] Erika Jayne: I'm three years old... my grandmother's holding me and she's like, oh, there's your Grandfather... I remember her holding me and the gift he gave me, which was like a little carousel.”

She reflects on her upbringing, describing herself as tomboyish and enjoying activities like skiing and fishing:

“[26:04] Teddi Mellencamp: When it comes to things with your dad or your grandpa...

“[26:59] Erika Jayne: They’re living in my mind... We had a lake house... I had a go kart and I was fishing.”

---

Relationships with Cast Members

The episode delves into Erika’s relationships with other cast members outside of filming. She discusses her connections with individuals like Dorit and Kyle, emphasizing mutual support:

“[15:09] Erika Jayne: I just... I have text with Cobb and texting. ... I've been close with Dorit and Kyle...”

Teddi inquires about trust and support within the cast:

“[15:39] Teddi Mellencamp: If you were to get into trouble and you could only call one of them, who would it be?”

“[15:48] Erika Jayne: Probably Bose. She's tough. She's a really good critical thinker.”

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Advice and Life Lessons

Towards the end of the episode, Teddi asks Erika what advice she would give her 25-year-old self:

“[20:54] Teddi Mellencamp: If you could go back to when you were 25 years old, what advice would you give yourself?”

Erika Jayne offers a blend of encouragement and reflection:

“[21:09] Erika Jayne: I just... It is what it is. I think I would say to myself, you're on the right path.”

She emphasizes learning from past experiences without dwelling on regrets:

“[21:13] Teddi Mellencamp: Does that haunt you at all?

“[21:13] Erika Jayne: I don't live my life with regrets... you gain something from everything you go through...”

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Closing Thoughts

In wrapping up the episode, Teddi and Erika discuss the complexities of maintaining personal relationships while leading public lives. They touch upon the challenges of perception versus reality and the importance of genuine connections:

“[36:30] Teddi Mellencamp: Life can be really freaking hard, but it also can be amazing.”

“[36:53] Teddi Mellencamp: Speaking of, I want to know...”

“[37:57] Teddi Mellencamp: Life is too short, you guys. Life is short even on its longest days...”

Erika reinforces the message of embracing life's ups and downs, advocating for authenticity and self-empowerment:

“[37:48] Teddi Mellencamp: When you're doing nothing wrong.

“[37:49] Erika Jayne: That's my point. Life is too short for this shit.”

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Conclusion

Diamonds in the Rough: You Asked, Erika Spills offers a profound look into Erika Jayne's personal journey, her approach to relationships, and the balancing act between her public persona and private self. Through candid conversations and heartfelt reflections, listeners gain a deeper understanding of the challenges and triumphs Erika faces both on and off the reality TV screen.

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Notable Quotes:

• Erika Jayne on Authentic Dating:
  “[05:24] Erika Jayne: I have to be somebody that I would actually spend time with and not for television.”

• Erika on Overcoming Challenges:
  “[11:45] Erika Jayne: I didn't want them to be in control of my life story.”

• On Balancing Persona:
  “[13:47] Teddi Mellencamp: Is there a moment with Tom that you've never discussed that still haunts you.”

• Life Advice:
  “[21:09] Erika Jayne: You're on the right path.”

---

This episode provides a heartfelt exploration of Erika Jayne's life, offering listeners an authentic glimpse into her experiences, resilience, and the pursuit of genuine connections amidst the glamour and scrutiny of reality television.

Transcript

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Could you, like, chill for a sec?

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[Teddi Mellencamp]

Hi, guys. Welcome to another episode welcome to another episode of Diamonds in the Rough with myself, Teddi Mellencamp.

[Erika Jayne]

Hey, I'm Erika Jayne. Without my lashes. I had to tear them off because my allergies were bad.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

I knew when I saw a little drip, I was like, yep, she's gonna rip those off. We both get that.

[Erika Jayne]

Yeah. I didn't take my allergy meds and just didn't work out. Yeah. So if you see me with puffy eyes and no lashes. It is what it is, y' all.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

It is what it is. So last episode, we did a Q and A with me. This episode, we're doing a Q and A with Erica.

[Erika Jayne]

Okay, let me have it.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

All right, so the first question is, what Broadway show? If you could pick any, would you want to do next?

[Erika Jayne]

Fuck. Okay. Okay. Cabaret. I don't know. Yeah, there's so many. I need to look, but that just, like, pops up. But I don't know. I don't know that I'd be right for it. Do you know what I'm saying? But I think being on Broadway is like a gift.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Know what I think you would be so good at?

[Erika Jayne]

Tell me.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

I mean, I know it's not currently on Broadway, but it's one of my favorite musicals.

[Erika Jayne]

Which one?

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Gentlemen Prefer Blondes.

[Erika Jayne]

I mean, come on. Does it get any better than that? No.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Gentlemen prefer blondes. Or what's the one with tits and ass?

[Erika Jayne]

Chorus Line.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Chorus line.

[Erika Jayne]

Bought myself a fancy pair. Tightened up the derriere, did the nose with it. All the Go with it. Yep.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

H. Both of those would be about. I loved her.

[Erika Jayne]

She was great. I love that show. Chorus Line was amazing. That was such a good one.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Because the truth, it's so good. And all the. And you got to really invest in all the characters.

[Erika Jayne]

Don't pop the head or don't pop the hip.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Oh, yeah.

[Erika Jayne]

Honey. She could not. She was a soloist.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Oh, my gosh. That Was a good one. Would you go on the next season of Love Hotel? We want to see you dating.

[Erika Jayne]

I want to date too, but not on Love Hotel.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

But are you going to date on.

[Erika Jayne]

I would if they. I don't. I'm not opposed to it. I'm not opposed to it. It's just a matter of finding. Here's what guys. Just to be straight up truthful, I don't mind dating and having fun with people. I really don't. I'm not looking to get married. I'm not looking to move in with someone or like anything like that. I would like to go out, would like to have fun. I would like to really. I've been married basically all of my adult life. Here's the. Here's the thing. I want to spend time with people that I would actually spend time with and not for television.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah.

[Erika Jayne]

Then that's. That's something that's really like. I have no problem doing it, but it needs to be somebody that I find genuinely interesting because I can't fake it. That's. I can't fake that. Well.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Remember one of our most fun nights? I don't think they showed it, but we were in the Bahamas and we went to the nightclub afterwards and we're all like, dancing and having fun. That type of night where, like, then maybe some guy was like flirting with you or something. I think that's a good way to tie it in where you had to have a. Like, it didn't happen in the Bahamas. But like, we were all at that.

[Erika Jayne]

Point where, like, that was such a good time. Woo.

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And.

[Erika Jayne]

And I think sometimes you don't get to see that. And, you know, they say, we want to see you dating. Yeah, I want to see me dating too. But I want to also spend time with people that I would actually spend time with.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah.

[Erika Jayne]

And people that I find interesting. And I'm somebody that dates way out of, like, what you may think I do. Like. I like nerds. I like. I like a lot of my. I like. I have a wide breadth of people that I find interesting. But it has to be like a genuine thing. I can't go on a long.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

You're not gonna go sit. You're not gonna go do like some. One of the shows, like, I think it was Potomac or something. They did like, speed dating.

[Erika Jayne]

Well, actually, that would actually be funny because I don't think I would. I'm also an odd. Duh.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

I wonder how you do at speed dating.

[Erika Jayne]

Probably not well, because I like to get to know people. I Don't really. I mean, yes, you judge people in the first, what, millisecond. That you meet them and. But oftentimes I can be wrong.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

How long did it take for you to decide that you would want to go on a date with Tom?

[Erika Jayne]

A year. Tom? A year. I waited on Tom for a year.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

But did you like him immediately?

[Erika Jayne]

Mr. Girardi. Which is how I met him. Obviously. He's. Tom, to me, was the kindest, nicest person to everyone from the valet to the busboy to the waiter to the cocktail waitress. The owners loved him. He was a solid guy all the way around. So I knew him for a year before we ever went on a dinner date.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah.

[Erika Jayne]

So I'd actually watched this man for a year.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

And then. How long did you wait to have sex?

[Erika Jayne]

Months.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Months For Peter.

[Erika Jayne]

I'm not doing that now. That was a different time in life. Like, now I'm not waiting at all. And I have no problem saying that, because bottom line is, I'm at a different place in my life. So if I like you and I want to have sex with you, whether it's tonight, tomorrow, whenever, I'm going to be very upfront with that, and I have no shame in saying that. And I'm grown, and I can do whatever the fuck I want, and I will do it.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

And if something feels right, I will do that. Yeah.

[Erika Jayne]

If I feel comfortable and he feels comfortable, then.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

And it seems like an enjoyable experience, then why not? Yeah, why not?

[Erika Jayne]

What are we waiting for? I mean, what. What, so you can respect me? How about this? Don't need it. Don't need it. You know, it's just. It's not. I'm. I'm a really grown up. Well, I hate to say this because it sounds so trite, but it's like, what is it that you're going to do? Marry me? That's not in the cards. I don't want that.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Or looking for someone to have kids with.

[Erika Jayne]

Yeah, that's in the review. So we're here to have fun. And I love pleasure. I'm sure most men do, too. And so that's what I'm into. And that'll. That's. It'll be what it's gonna be.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

But if you. If you started hanging out with somebody and you were enjoying them, would you ask them? Do you.

[Erika Jayne]

Come on Real Housewives, That's a really difficult ask. And I'll tell you why. It takes a specific person. It. Listen, how many wives have we seen fail?

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah.

[Erika Jayne]

Do you know. Meaning that you think you know what? This. I don't know that I could do that to somebody that isn't already in the public eye. To take someone that doesn't have any type of experience with being on reality or, or being in a public forum, to ask them to come on a show like this, then it makes us.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Seem a little phony.

[Erika Jayne]

But they don't do well. They're not themselves and it's not fair because then they receive. Like if you. You could ruin someone's business being on.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

This show, within seconds they can say one wrong thing. It's not like you get that edit.

[Erika Jayne]

That's my point. You could honestly, you could innocently bring someone as a plus one to an event. They could say something that and then really be harmed by it, not really knowing what's going on. And I don't know that about that. So if I brought someone on, it would have to be somebody that gets the game. Yeah, that's only into the game. Players don't hit me up if you're not in the game.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah, to be on the show.

[Erika Jayne]

Yeah. Well, in life too, like, there's a certain game that I'm playing that not everybody's playing. And it's not about your money.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

It's not about your money.

[Erika Jayne]

It's not about your money.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Is it about confidence?

[Erika Jayne]

Yes, it is. It's about confidence, intelligence and accomplishment and kindness and kind. Well, yes, kindness too. But I mean, if you really want to get down to it, it's about your life experience. You got to have some experience or you gotta have massive career.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

You can't be super naive.

[Erika Jayne]

Gotta have a lot of charisma.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Well, that's called rez now.

[Erika Jayne]

Yes, it is. I know. For the, for the kids, there is.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

The rest that you got to have the rizz.

[Erika Jayne]

Sorry?

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Slate's best friend calls me the Rizzler.

[Erika Jayne]

I kind of like that for you. The Rizzler.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

How's the Rizzler? Okay. Was there ever a moment you almost quit rhobh? And if so, what stopped you from quitting?

[Erika Jayne]

Yes, I wanted to. I sincerely thought about quitting during the worst of my legal troubles. And what made me not quit was two things. I didn't want to be a quitter. This is so wild. And I. Again, it's one thing to watch a show, it's another thing to be on the cast. It's a completely different thing. And I didn't want to be a quitter. And I wasn't going to be ran out of something that no matter how tough it was or how hard they made it on me. I didn't want them to be in control of my life story.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Right.

[Erika Jayne]

And that's something that I wouldn't do.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah. What was the time frame?

[Erika Jayne]

Right. When? It was during the worst of my legal troubles. So it was probably. Right. That season where I drank a lot and blacked out a lot.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

That's.

[Erika Jayne]

Yeah. Whenever. That was a couple years ago.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah. I think that was like two seasons ago.

[Erika Jayne]

Yeah.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah. Okay. How much of Erika Jane is still Erica Girardi when the cameras are off and can you explain this to people? Because I listened to your TED Talk.

[Erika Jayne]

Yeah.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

So I feel like that's when honestly, like, a lot of the things that I learned was through that and I was able to connect with you in a different way. But I think people get a little confused about this. Erica Jane versus Erica Gerard.

[Erika Jayne]

I. I think again, this comes down to performance Persona. And like, what. But we could also say this. There's also Teddy Mellencamp. That's. That I know. And Teddy Mellencamp, that's on here.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Right.

[Erika Jayne]

So it's like when I used to see my judge friends on the bench and they would be tough as fuck, and then they'd be like, fun. Or my friends that are in law enforcement that are tough as fuck, but then they're nice people. So Erika Jayne is a. I'm not saying that there's our performance Personas, but in some way, like, we're different. You know, it's a performance Persona. It's an over the top caricature. No limits, no boundaries. But I'm actually basically like a very calm sort of level headed person. Do you push that for shows? It's called shows. Yeah, you do that for shows.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

But I think when you're on Beverly Hills, you're Erica Girardi.

[Erika Jayne]

Yeah, but this is an. Of course I'm Erica. But you know, we're talking about an engineered reality. Right. So the show's based around our lives. And yes, it's all true. I wish that mine wasn't true. Okay. Whenever somebody says, oh, that's not true, I wish the shit I was going through was not happening to me. But it is, and it is very much reality. Now. I can't speak for anybody else. Right. I'm just talking about me. But are there things that. This is where reality TVs done such a beautiful job of blurring lines between performance in real life.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Right. Yeah, let's make that makes sense. You know, is there a moment with Tom that you've never discussed that still Haunts you.

[Erika Jayne]

Yes, but what. But I can't because it's just.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

What about one on the show?

[Erika Jayne]

No, the show is nothing compared to what I've experienced in real life.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Okay, what about that scene where it was like you and lvp and it's the first time you can tell he's kind of.

[Erika Jayne]

Oh, at home. Yeah. I mean, you know, watching that back is so funny because when you're in it, you can't see it. And you watch it back now and you're like, wow, I really lived like that.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah.

[Erika Jayne]

And that. That, That's. That's hard because you go, wow, I really lived like that. Yeah, I really lived like that.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

There's some housewives that talk about how they have zero relationships with the people that are on the show when they're not filming. How's your relationship with the cast when you're not filming?

[Erika Jayne]

I think it's pretty good. I think with the women that I'm close with. You're not close with everybody in the cast. You're just not. You have different. You relate differently with different women on the show. And you're closer with some than others.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Who do you think you're closest with?

[Erika Jayne]

I see you every week.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

I'm not on the show.

[Erika Jayne]

Oh, fuck. See, I'm not on. How about that?

[Teddi Mellencamp]

I'm not on the show.

[Erika Jayne]

I totally forgot. You're not on the show.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

I'm not on the show.

[Erika Jayne]

I totally forgot about that.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

And you can't say run it either.

[Erika Jayne]

And I talk to her every week. Well, sometimes we. We mess up, but I text with Cobb and texting. But I've been close with Dorit and Kyle, going through all of these lot, these. Their separations and whatever they're going through in their lives. I text with Sutton every now and then. We send each other cat stuff. Nothing heavy. Bose, I've.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

I've.

[Erika Jayne]

You know, we're friendly. There have been some weeks that I text her, some weeks that I don't. Yeah, but.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah, but if you were to get into trouble and you could only call one of them, who would it be?

[Erika Jayne]

I can't call you because that's overwhelming.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

You can't call me cuz I'm not on the show.

[Erika Jayne]

Oh, on the show. I thought you meant in our group.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

No.

[Erika Jayne]

Probably Bose.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

She gets done.

[Erika Jayne]

Yeah, she's tough. Meaning that she's real clear.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

She's.

[Erika Jayne]

She's.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

She could get someone out of some trouble or she's.

[Erika Jayne]

Or she could. She's a really good critical thinker.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah. Yeah, she's a clear thinker. You realize I've never met her.

[Erika Jayne]

You need to. Yeah, I think you'd really like her.

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[Erika Jayne]

Not right now.

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@ T Mobile.

[Erika Jayne]

I feel like I have to give.

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You something in return for karma.

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That's okay.

[Danielle Fishel]

I don't really have much in my purse. Oh, let's see. Hand sanitizer. It's lavender.

[Will Friedle]

I'm good. Seriously.

[Danielle Fishel]

Let me check this pocket. Oh, mints.

[Will Friedle]

Really, I'm fine.

[Danielle Fishel]

Oh, I have raisins. I'm a mom. Wait, wait one sec. I've got cupcakes in the car.

[Ryan Seacrest]

It's our best iPhone offer ever. Switch to T Mobile. Get a new iPhone 16 Pro with Apple intelligence on us, no trade in needed. We'll even pay off your phone up to 800 bucks.

[Will Friedle]

We with 24 monthly bill credits, new line, 100 plus a month on experience beyond finance agreement. $999.99 and qualifying ported for well qualified plus tax and $10 connection charge.

[Erika Jayne]

Payout via virtual prepaid card.

[Will Friedle]

Allow 15 days credits and balance due.

[Erika Jayne]

If you pay off early or cancel.

[Justin Richmond]

CT mobile.com this is Justin Richmond from Broken Record. Are you the kind of person who sets standards for themselves? Like personally, I told myself if the Lakers lose or do or die Game five, I wouldn't let it impact my mood at home with family. The standard Lexus has set for themselves is to experience amazing. Lexus measures success by the feelings and emotions evoked in a driver, like exhilaration and joy. Amazing can only be achieved by knowing people on a deeper level. The standard of amazing results in machines that make you feel more human, because a car that doesn't make you feel something is a car that stops short of amazing. Experience amazing at your Lexus dealer Now.

[Will Friedle]

You can watch the best of Hulu right on Disney. The hottest Hulu shows and movies now streaming alongside your Disney favorites with Hulu on Disney. Catch New seasons of the Handmaid's Tale welcome to Wrexham, the Secret Lives of Mormon Wives and nine Perfect Strangers Nicole Kidman returns in season two of nine Perfect Strangers as Masha welcomes a new group of guests to a wellness retreat in the Austrian Alps. Her goal is to heal their minds and bodies, but as the experience unfolds, their journeys take an unexpected and potentially unsettling turn. And don't miss Marvel's Born Again and Star Andor Season 2 on Disney. Hailed as a masterpiece and the best Star wars has ever been, Season two of andor delivers high stakes action, gripping drama and even romance as Cassian Andor continues his journey toward fulfilling his heroic rebel destiny. All these and more now streaming with Hulu on Disney with a bundle subscription available with bundle plans starting at $10.99 a month. Terms apply. Visit disneyplus.com hulu for details.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and safeway. Now through June 24th. Score hot summer savings and earn four times the points. Look for in store tags on items like Kinder, Bueno, Cheez It Crackers, Oscar Meyer Lunchables and just bare chicken bites. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event long savings. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in store or online for easy drive up and go pickup or delivery subject to availability restrictions apply. Visit Albertsons or Safeway.com for more details.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

If you could go back to when you were 25 years old, what advice would you give yourself?

[Erika Jayne]

Just keep going. It's gonna work out well. Let me think. What was I doing when I was 25? I was already a mom. I was already divorced.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Does that Haunt you at all? Are you like. No, that happened just right.

[Erika Jayne]

I just. It is what it is. I think I would say to myself, you're on the right path. But, you know, it's interesting because I don't really live my life with regrets saying, oh, that shouldn't have happened, or. Because you gain something. I believe, anyway, you gain something from everything you go through, even, like, all this terrible. With Tom, I've learned a lot about myself, about others, about life. I've come through a whole, like, thing. So do I regret anything? The answer is no. But could I have looked out for myself maybe differently? Yeah. Like, when I. The comment I just said, wow, I really lived that way.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah.

[Erika Jayne]

Yeah. I really lived that way. Like, I lived being talked to like that. And I guess you don't know what.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

You don't know what would happen if somebody. If you started dating somebody and they started talking to you that way again, that's not gonna.

[Erika Jayne]

I can tell you right now, I did kind of have that happen, and I revolted. Like, I literally, physically.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

How long did it take you to figure it out?

[Erika Jayne]

It took me about 30 seconds.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Oh, really? See, I mean, I think that's the scary.

[Erika Jayne]

I think it's one of the reasons why I'm not easily approachable either.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah. Because you know what? You definitely don't want.

[Erika Jayne]

And I don't think that I put out come talk to me vibes. Yeah. And I think it's a problem. I've talked to my therapist about it. Like, how do I get past. You know, I've been through a couple things post t. Post Tom and been through a couple things, and I've had some adverse reactions to people, like, talking to me. When I say adverse, it's not dramatic, but just like, inside where you're like. So, yeah, I have to get past that.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

But you say that. But that's. I think, when it comes to complete strangers. But if it's a friend of a friend or something, you're very warm and open to them.

[Erika Jayne]

Yes.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Which I don't think people know nobody.

[Erika Jayne]

If I feel safe, like, with someone that I'm very sweet and very warm is. If I don't know you, I don't know you.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

And now you've given me a red flag.

[Erika Jayne]

Right. I don't know you. I don't trust you.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah.

[Erika Jayne]

I think everybody's. I don't even want to put this out because I think what you say carries weight, but I think everybody's an enemy.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

That's how it starts.

[Erika Jayne]

Everybody is an enemy.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Male or female.

[Erika Jayne]

All of them. Yeah. Anybody is out to get anybody. No one is friendly. So. But then when I get to trust people and like Teddy says, the Erica that they know is completely different than the Erica that you'd be like, what? That's not.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

That's like I've introduced you to a complete stranger before of yours and you're warm and because I've said this is somebody that I know.

[Erika Jayne]

Right. And I said, oh, hi.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

And like immediate and asking questions, like something Erica is really good at, which I would say a lot of people in this industry or not is asking questions.

[Erika Jayne]

Yeah.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Because a lot of people are so self obsessed or absorbed.

[Erika Jayne]

Well, I'd like to get to know others. And I will also remember and I will say, oh, if I see someone again, I remember we spoke about your apartment in Florence.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

I do remember.

[Erika Jayne]

How was your daughter doing at college? I know you said that she was at wherever. I listen to what people have to say.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

So when we see on Beverly Hills or I've seen in real life is like we could be driving past a building and you'll know like all of the information about it. Is that like something you studied or is that just any time that you have a memory, your. Your mind just retains it?

[Erika Jayne]

Well, I don't want to go on record as saying I remember everything because there are some people who do. But if I'm interested in something which I'm really interested in architecture, I know, that's why and history and shit like that, then I can tell you, oh, you know that building. Da da da da da. Of course, I've probably looked at it online and then I'm just. The things that I'm fascinated with, I just retain and people, when I find somebody interesting or somebody that I think is kind of cool, I just remember everything they say to me.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Can you remember people's names? Because that's something I need to work on.

[Erika Jayne]

I need to work on that. It depends. I remember and I've said this many times, I don't really remember what people look like. I remember the feeling I had around them. So I remember whether somebody. I thought they felt smart to me or they felt kind of to me or meaning like they, they gave off an aura of kindness or intelligence or capable or something like that.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah, yeah. What's your favorite childhood memory?

[Erika Jayne]

Oh my God. Okay. I'm three years old. I remember my three year old birthday party. It's a very brief memory, but my grandmother's holding me and she's like, oh, there's your Grandfather, now you're gonna ask me why do you remember this? Because it's my father's father and I didn't know my dad.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Do you remember what he looks like and everything?

[Erika Jayne]

I can't. I can only remember her holding me and the gift he gave me, which was like a little carousel, but I can't see him.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

This is making me emotional.

[Erika Jayne]

Oh, no, no, no, don't. But I remember I became conscious. This is gonna sound crazy, but I remember when I was three, I remember my three year old birthday party. And then I remember three being great. And I remember kindergarten being fabulous.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah.

[Erika Jayne]

I fucking loved kindergarten. Kindergarten was my favorite academic year.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Did you have like the Minnie Mouse years and do all the.

[Erika Jayne]

No, but my. I had a play date with every little boy in my kindergarten class, and we would ride bikes and catch turtles and go on picnics. So my mom always kept my bike in the trunk of her car because I would go on a play date with all my different friends.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

And when it comes to things with your dad or your grandpa.

[Erika Jayne]

Yeah.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Those little memories that you do have, do you save them in some capacity or, like, write them down or they just are always living in your mind?

[Erika Jayne]

They're living in my mind. But, you know, my grandfather gave. I had a go kart and a BB gun, but. And he would, you know. And I used to ski. We had a lake house. So he was constantly driving. He was constantly pulling my ass around on skis or slaloming in our lake house. And, you know, he was the first person to put a rifle in my hand. And. Yeah. You know, like. And I had a go kart and I was fishing. I was brought up like a. Like, very tomboyish. Yeah. Southern girl like you. You know, just Southern girl. Yeah.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

And sorry, now. Now I'm. Now I'm asking my own personal questions, but when it comes to the stuff, you know, with your dad or your grandpa, do you have any, like, resentment towards your mom or is it all towards him?

[Erika Jayne]

I think it's a 50, 50 thing. I don't think that. Look, people, everybody. My mother was young, so was he. But it's a 50, 50 thing. People do what they want to do, you know? I think it's a 50.

[Will Friedle]

Hi, Zoe Saldana. Welcome to T Mobile. Here's your new iPhone 16 Pro on us.

[Danielle Fishel]

Thanks. And here's my old phone to trade in.

[Will Friedle]

You don't need a trade in when you switch to T Mobile. We'll give you a new iPhone 16 Pro plus, we'll help you pay off your old Phone up to 800 bucks and you still get to keep it.

[Danielle Fishel]

There's always a trade in.

[Will Friedle]

Not right now. AT T Mobile.

[Danielle Fishel]

I feel like I have to give you something in return for karma.

[Will Friedle]

That's okay.

[Danielle Fishel]

I don't really have much in my purse. Oh, let's see. Hand sanitizer. It's lavender.

[Will Friedle]

I'm good. Seriously.

[Danielle Fishel]

Let me check this pocket. Oh, mints.

[Will Friedle]

Really, I'm fine.

[Danielle Fishel]

Oh, I have raisins. I'm a mom. Wait, wait one sec. I've got cupcakes in the car.

[Ryan Seacrest]

It's our best iPhone offer ever. Switch to T Mobile, get a new iPhone 16 Pro with Apple Intelligence on us. No trade in needed. We'll even pay off your phone up.

[Erika Jayne]

To 800 bucks with 24 monthly bill credits.

[Danielle Fishel]

New line $100 plus a month on.

[Will Friedle]

Experience beyond Finance Agreement 999.99 and qualify imported for well qualified plus tax and $10 connection charge.

[Erika Jayne]

Pay off via virtual prepaid card.

[Danielle Fishel]

Allow 15 days credits and imbalance due.

[Erika Jayne]

If you pay off earlier.

[Justin Richmond]

Cancel CT mobile.com this is Justin Richmond from Broken Record. Are you the kind of person who sets standards for themselves? Like personally, I told myself if the Lakers lose or do or die Game five, I wouldn't let it impact my mood at home with family. The standard Lexus has set for themselves is to experience amazing. Lexus measures success by the feelings and emotions evoked in a driver, like exhilaration and joy. Amazing can only be achieved by knowing people on a deeper level. The standard of amazing results in machines that make you feel more human because a car that doesn't make you feel something is a car that stops short of amazing experience. Amazing at your Lexus dealer.

[Will Friedle]

Now you can watch the best of Hulu right on Disney. The hottest Hulu shows and movies now streaming alongside your Disney favorites with Hulu on Disney. Catch new seasons of the Handmaid's Tale. Welcome to the Secret Lives of Mormon Wives and nine Perfect Strangers. Nicole Kidman returns in season two of nine Perfect Strangers as Masha welcomes a new group of guests to a wellness retreat in the Austrian Alps. Her goal is to heal their minds and bodies, but as the experience unfolds, their journeys take an unexpected and potentially unsettling turn. And don't miss Marvel's Born Again and Star wars and or season two on Disney. Hailed as a masterpiece and the best Star wars has ever been, season two of Andor delivers high stakes action, gripping drama and even romance as Cassian Andor continues his journey toward fulfilling his heroic rebel destiny. All these and more now streaming with Hulu on Disney with a bundle subscription available with bundle plans starting at $10.99 a month. Terms apply. Visit disneyplus.com hulu for details.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and safeway. Now through June 24th. Score hot summer savings and earn four times a look for in store tags on Items like Pepsi 2 liter bottles, poppy prebiotic sodas, all laundry detergent, and Kinder's seasoning blend. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event long savings. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in store or online for easy drive up and go pickup or delivery subject to availability restrictions apply. Visit Albertsons or Safeway.com for more details.

[Menage a Trois Wines]

Ladies, you all know that the best nights start with a great conversation and of course, a delicious glass of wine. And and when it comes to finding the perfect bottle, Menage a Trois wines never disappoint. Whether you're in the mood for a bold red or crisp white wine, menage a Trois brings out the best in every sip. Smooth, flavorful, and always a little daring. And here's where things get really exciting. You can win a trip for three to an iHeartRadio event of your choice. That's right, an unforgettable experience with two of your favorite favorite people in the city of your choice. Plus all the music and entertainment you love. Just head to the menageritois wines.com to enter. So grab your favorite bottle of menage trois, pour a glass, and toast to enticing adventure in every bottle. Cheers. All rights reserved. Menage Trois Winery, St. Helena, California Table wine please enjoy their wines responsibly.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

They asked if we'd ever go on a double date. I for sure would.

[Erika Jayne]

Me too.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

But I don't know that we have the same type.

[Erika Jayne]

But I But a date. Let me just say something. Going down Friends, right? Dates. Dates do not mean we're running off with them and getting married. Like, if you're seeing somebody and I said and you said, come on, let's go, Erica. I'd be like, of course. I'm actually very easy to get along with. And I do a lot of so yeah, I'd love to do something like that. I think that's cute.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

I would do a double date with you a million percent. But who do you think should be the picker of the two guys, you or me?

[Erika Jayne]

You. And I'll tell you why. Because you are far more I can roll with the punches. We've seen she this one. You need more Control.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah.

[Erika Jayne]

You. You need, and you deserve the control. Right now, I'm just along for the ride, like, whatever.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Okay, perfect. Well.

[Erika Jayne]

And we could have fun. And it's not like there's no pressure to, like, there's no man or your dreams. Let me also say this. When I talk about dating, I'm not talking about somebody to come save me or rescue me. I'm talking about. I'm living my life in the present moment. Let's have fun.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah.

[Erika Jayne]

That's really what it all comes down to.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Let's have fun. And I mean, I'm here to tell you, like, I. There was Reese. I was recently at an event, and somebody was like, oh, can we set you up with this man?

[Erika Jayne]

Yeah.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

And I mean, maybe he had Riz, but he had none of the other things that I would enjoy. And they're like, you don't understand how rich he is. And I was like, I don't. At this point in my life, I couldn't care less.

[Erika Jayne]

Yeah, I could.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

I would rather hustle and slang every single thing that I can on Instagram than deal with that somebody that I know is gonna have complete control over me and that I do not find attractive.

[Erika Jayne]

And that there's a lot to be said there. And I think that. So I've been totally on my own for almost five years now. And while it's scary, there's something to that. That what you're saying about having complete. I don't know that I could be talked to like that again. Like that dinner you brought up. I don't know that I could do that.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah.

[Erika Jayne]

I just don't know. I'd rather get out here and stand up every day and work than kind of be, like, taken back to that.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Place to feel that. Like, to feel small.

[Erika Jayne]

To feel small and to feel like you owe someone something or you. Or you're indebted to them and yes, you're married to them. And guys, I'm not saying this, but you've been married to one of these personalities that's larger than life or whatever. Like, it's a lot.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

It's a lot. It's a lot trying to shrink yourself or trying to.

[Erika Jayne]

Or thinking.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

But then when you're not, it's weird. It's like you're trying to shrink yourself, but then you also need to impress them.

[Erika Jayne]

You need to carry your weight.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yes.

[Erika Jayne]

But then you need to not overran on them. And then. And I'll never forget Doug Ross saying.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Doug Ross is one of. The producer. Used to be one of the heads of evolution which produces Real Housewives.

[Erika Jayne]

This is years ago. Well, how has Tom taken to you being on? I thought, you know, well, he's fine with it. Well, sometimes men, you know, their wives. I was like, well, no, Tom's had a lot of. A lot of success and a lot of turns in the sun. He wouldn't ever feel any type of way about me. He would be so thrilled for me. Cut to nine years later. That was not the case.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Of course it wasn't the case. You felt that way because he hadn't been in that situation before.

[Erika Jayne]

That's right.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

And then the second that you were.

[Erika Jayne]

Well, it took. Took years. But then at the end, like, before I left, I mean, it was like there was some things that came out of Tom's mouth that I literally thought, my God, is that you in there?

[Teddi Mellencamp]

And I wouldn't say this to my worst enemy.

[Erika Jayne]

My God, is that you in there? Like, is this how you've really felt about me the entire fucking time?

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Oh, gosh, guys. Well, the thing that we can say in closing is life can be really freaking hard, but it also can be amazing. And I think the more that we open up and the more that we talk about stuff, the good, the bad, and the ugly, the better our lives are going to be.

[Erika Jayne]

I think also too, no one in life does not go through this with partners. Like, on some level, you may not experience it the way we experienced it or you experienced it. And yes, we live. We choose. We choose to lead public lives. So obviously we're up for whatever interpretation, but everybody goes through something like this. Yeah, we were just like, what. What the is going on?

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Speaking of, I want to know. Okay, whoever our listener was that wrote in and said she wanted to go to lunch with her best. Her ex boyfriend.

[Erika Jayne]

No, no, it wasn't an ex boyfriend. It was a friend. She was married to the controlling husband. She was gonna go see a friend.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

But it was a marriage.

[Erika Jayne]

Is it worth it? Right? Was it worth it?

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Did you go see him? I need to know, did you see him and what happened? And give us all the. We need some kind of follow up on some of these things.

[Erika Jayne]

And I wanted to follow up by saying this. I was watching our clips the other day. I'm not saying you can't have friendships. I'm saying underneath the conditions that you said, I have a controlling husband. Is it worth it? And I said, no, it's not worth it.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

And I'm curious if you have done it and if so, was it worth it?

[Erika Jayne]

Because maybe if you can get away with it, sure. But do you want to be married to somebody controlling as somebody that you.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Have to get away with things?

[Erika Jayne]

That's my point.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

When you're doing nothing wrong.

[Erika Jayne]

That's my point. And you're going to be made to feel like you were doing something wrong and all you were doing was meeting with a friend.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah.

[Erika Jayne]

Life is too short for this shit.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Life is too short, you guys. Life is short even on its longest days, like my new tattoo, which, by.

[Erika Jayne]

The way, I know. That's such a beautiful thing.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Thanks, guys. Well, we appreciate you for tuning in. We will be back next week. If you have any questions, thoughts, concerns, you want to leave a note for us?

[Erika Jayne]

And concerns. Oh, wait, should we have that one question that we were like?

[Teddi Mellencamp]

The. The question was, where do you stand with Denise and LvP? For me, Denise I have not spoken to in a very long time. Apparently she was reaching out to me when I was in the hospital, but I don't know. I wasn't talking to anyone. But I can say this is everything that I had thought about Denise and the person that she was in real life is what we saw on her new show. So the. The Persona, and that's what always drove me.

[Erika Jayne]

Are you saying that's a good thing or a bad thing or what do you think?

[Teddi Mellencamp]

I'm simply saying what the part that irritated me so much about Denise was she was performing to be somebody that she really wasn't. On her new show, she seems to be more open and relaxed. And relaxed and herself and not as worried about pretending to be this Beverly Hills housewife. And that made me go, okay, good. I'm glad she came around. LVP I have not seen in the flesh in a couple years. I think the last time I saw her was the night of the James Kennedy fiasco. The one. Not the most recent one, but a couple times ago, and I was at TomTom, it was after the MTV Awards, and I walked by her and I said, hello.

[Erika Jayne]

What did she say to you?

[Teddi Mellencamp]

And we probably talked for like five minutes.

[Erika Jayne]

Oh, nice.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

But it was. It was whatever. Do I think she'll ever probably say anything nice about me? No. Do I need to say anything nice about her?

[Erika Jayne]

No.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

No.

[Erika Jayne]

Yeah. No.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

What about you?

[Erika Jayne]

I saw Denise because I did her show.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Oh, yeah.

[Erika Jayne]

It was cute. And I had a nice time with Denise. Denise can be for Denise. Her life is wild.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Yeah, it is wild.

[Erika Jayne]

Her life is wild. Like, God bless her. Because we couldn't do it. I can't do that.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

No.

[Erika Jayne]

And I'm not saying anything bad about it. It's just I need a little bit more structure, just a little bit. Lisa Vanderpump I have not seen in years.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Have you seen her since she didn't come on the show anymore?

[Erika Jayne]

No, I don't think so.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

That. I mean, because that's the thing. They make Beverly Hills seem like it's such a small town that we see everybody all the time, but we don't.

[Erika Jayne]

Well, I think she's moved on, right? Like she's moved on and whatever. I will say this, though. I saw her because I get tagged and don't bring up housewives if you don't want to be, you know, associated with. She does bring it up a lot.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

And she does bring up housewives to talk about negative, negatively a lot.

[Erika Jayne]

There was a magician and he, you know, can you make people disappear? Can you make some housewives disappear? I was like, let's make you disappear. Why are you talking about it? Like, just leave it alone or come.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Back on and fight it out. Good luck to you. All right, guys. Thank you.

[Erika Jayne]

Here we are being nice and then we ended. On that note. Yeah, come on down.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Come on down. Talk to y' all soon. Bye. Bye, bye.

[Danielle Fishel]

Hi, I'm Danielle Fishel from Pod Meets World. So for my two boys, I got Samsung Galaxy watch for kids. And I'm not saying I'm kind of jealous of my kids kids tech. I'm saying I am definitely jealous of my child's tech. This thing lets them call, text and explore all from their wrist. No smartphone required. And don't worry, you're still the boss. You control who they can talk to. And yes, you can totally stalk their location in real time. Get Galaxy Watch 7 on T mobile now. Kid ready with a new paired line. Visit t mobile.com to order yours today. Parent and child must have a Samsung account and Google account with family link. Requires initial pairing with a compatible Samsung smartphone and qualifying wireless plan with LTE service activated. Please check with your carrier for more information. Trusted contact applies to compatible apps. It does not restrict communication through third party or other communication apps. Emergency services and contacts remain accessible. Location sharing is dependent on network connectivity and device being recently active. T Mobile terms via 24 monthly bill credits. When you add a qualifying paired watch line. See additional offer terms on t mobile.com.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and safeway. Now through June 24th. Score hot summer savings and earn four times the points. Look for in store tags on items like kinder, Bueno, Cheez, it Crackers, Oscar Meyer Lunchables and just bear chicken bites. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event Long Savings Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in store or online for easy drive up and go pickup or delivery subject to availability restrictions apply. Visit Albertsons or Safeway.com for more details.

[Menage a Trois Wines]

Ladies, when's your next wine night? Whether you're looking for a bold red or a crisp white, Menage a Trois Wines has got you covered. And guess what? This year Menage a Trois has partnered with iHeartRadio to send you and two friends to an iHeartRadio event of your choice. From the Jingle Ball to the Podcast Awards, the choice is yours. Just head to menagetoiswines.com to enter. Pick up a bottle of Menageois wines today and cheers to enticing adventure in every bot. All rights reserved. Menage Trois Winery, St. Helena, California Table wine please enjoy their wines responsibly.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

Meet Gruns, your new go to for daily nutrition and eight tasty gummies packed with 20 plus vitamins, minerals and 60 whole food ingredients. They're vegan, gluten free and taste just like a fruit snack. And kids love Gruns too with a special formula just for them.

[Menage a Trois Wines]

Don't wait. Get up to 45% off your first order with code Teapot Groons. Serious nutrition, Serious fun. You're gonna love it.

[Erika Jayne]

This summer, Disney is going retro with.

[Danielle Fishel]

All your Disney and Hulu throwback faves. Hit Endless Rewind on Disney with the Princess diaries, the Lizzie McGuire Movie and Freaky Friday. Then with Hulu Throw It Back with.

[Erika Jayne]

Gilmore Girls, One Tree Hill and Full House.

[Danielle Fishel]

All these and more now totally streaming.

[Erika Jayne]

With Hulu on Disney with a bundle subscription available with Bundle plans starting $10.99 a month. Terms apply. Visit disneyplus.com hulu for details.

[Teddi Mellencamp]

This is an iHeart podcast.