
Debates rage amongst the public, press and politicians as "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" hangs in the balance. Randy struggles to imagine a reality where the policy no longer exists.
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It had to be you.
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This is your song. Wish I was singing.
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Narrator
This podcast is intended for mature audiences. Listener discretion is advised.
President Barack Obama
Thank you, Madam Speaker, Vice President Biden, members of Congress, distinguished guests, and fellow Americans.
Narrator
January 2010. President Barack Obama is giving his first ever State of the Union address. He promises to repeal the ban on gay men and women serving in the military this year.
President Barack Obama
This year, I will work with Congress and our military to finally repeal the law that denies gay Americans the right to serve the country they love because of who they are. It's the right thing to do.
Narrator
But this isn't the first time an American president has promised to end the ban. Bill Clinton made the same pledge almost 20 years before, but he couldn't make it happen. The Joint Chiefs met with President Clinton this afternoon, basically to voice their opposition to the lifting of the ban on gays in the military. Instead, Don't Ask, Don't Tell was introduced, and rather than making life better for gay and lesbian service members, it perpetuated the choking secrecy of the military closet. Ho ho.
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Narrator
Got to go. More gay people were expelled than ever before. I'm Eric Marcus from Waveland and Vespucci. This is Unfit for service. Episode 7 the Vote Randy and Lucas are on the move again. By the time President Obama is sworn into office, Randy's been reassigned from the White House to Scott Air Force Base in Illinois. It's about a half hour across the Mississippi river from the city of St. Louis, Missouri. Randy's in command of a brigade working around the clock, supporting missions rolling out across the globe. After a busy day at the office, Randy returns to the large house just off base that he and Lucas share. While Randy is free to come and go as he pleases, Lucas is still trapped by the secrecy of their relationship. Stuck in a gilded cage, he even has a curfew.
Randy
I would mow the grass, but know that I had to be back inside by 4:00 because his deputy lived a mile away and routinely walked past our house with his wife. So I was never outside in the front yard after 4 o'clock in the afternoon. You know, it was challenging.
Narrator
When officers in the military rise in rank, their home becomes an extension of their workplace. They're expected to host their colleagues and superiors whenever they come to town. Randy has mostly managed to avoid playing host throughout his career, he could always be the one to pay people a visit. But now, as a colonel at the Air Force base, things are different. It's much more claustrophobic. There's no reasonable way for him to dodge his hosting duties.
Randy
Luckily, Randy and I wear the same size clothing, so our clothes, it just made. If someone wandered into our closet, they would think, wow, he's got a lot of clothes. Personal items like toothbrushes and stuff like that. We wouldn't have two toothbrushes together.
Narrator
As they've done so many times over their years together, Randy and Lucas come up with a strategy, a protocol for keeping their relationship hidden. Anytime visitors are in the area, Lucas preemptively scrubs his existence from their home.
Randy
Personal possessions of mine quite often would end up in closets and never out on display. So that's how we kind of kept the house sterile. And that was always, because there was always a fear at that point in time that you may need to have someone over at the last minute.
Narrator
And it's not just impromptu drop ins they have to worry about. They also have to strategize for more formal visits.
Randy
There were quite a few times, probably about three to five times a year where the house was used. And Randy of course needed my help with that, which would be the case for any military spouse. You plan the menu, buy the food. One of these events at the house, Randy had me to plan the menu. It was barbecue, because his three star boss loved barbecue. So I planned the menu, the normal fixings you're gonna have for a barbecue. And Randy even had a special request that he had found out that his boss enjoyed a certain type of cigar. So I drove all over St. Louis going into smoke shops until I finally found one that had this specific cigar. And I'm thinking to myself, oh my God, there was smoke in my house. The day of the event arrives, I set it all up. I cook the items that I'm cooking. Everything is ready, and it's about 4:30 and I'm putting the final touches and I write little notes on everything, you know, okay, this has to come out of the oven at this point in time, you know, look in the refrigerator and pull this dish out. All preparing for Randy to walk in at 5:15. He arrives at home at 5:15 for me to quickly give him all these little notes that are on everything. And within five minutes I have to run out the door and get my car and drive away because at 5:30 the guest started to arrive. The guests pouring in to the house. Randy is there taking credit for all of this work that's going in. None of them are questioning the fact that he left the office at 5:00 and he's pulled off a full spread dinner. And here I am, I'm gonna read a book in a parking lot waiting for the clock to go by.
Narrator
While Lucas sits alone in his car, Randy and his colleagues feast on the meal that Lucas has choreographed from start to finish. With dinner over, Randy pulls out some celebratory bourbon and presents his boss with the extra special cigars that Lucas has schlepped all over St. Louis to find.
Randy
Military functions are pretty good. You say that it starts at 5:30. Everyone is there inside the house by 5:35 and they don't get there a minute early. And when you say it ends at 8:30, they're all gone. So 8:30 comes. Randy hasn't called me on his cell phone. 8:45 comes. He still hasn't called me. 9:00 o'cl he still hasn't called me.
Narrator
Lucas waits for the all clear for Randy to tell him he can come home. But there's no call. As the hours tick by, Lucas sits alone in a parking lot trying to stay focused on his book. But he's bored. His mind wanders and then kicks into overdrive. What if Randy's having too much fun? What if they've all had too much to drink and Randy's just forgotten to call him? Could he sleep in the car? Maybe it'd be safer to wait till morning before heading home. Lucas wonders how long he has to keep living like this. He and Randy have been together for over a decade. How much longer will he have to wait for a normal life? Finally, just after 10pm Randy calls and Lucas drives home. But when Lucas arrives back, the place is a mess.
Randy
The house was a complete disaster. We had just had between 30 and 60 people tramping over everything, setting everywhere. There were food spills, there were dishes on every table. The kitchen was a complete disaster. It was just a bomb that went off.
Narrator
It's late. Lucas is tired. His body aches. After hours, cooped up in the car, Randy offers to help, but Lucas knows that Randy's got an early start.
Randy
So I told him to go to bed and I would finish and take care of it. I'm not going to lie that I'm 100% okay with this. Because how could anyone be 100% okay with this? Because the irony of it is going through my head that I have just spent days preparing for this event. I have driven all over the city to make sure that we had everything we needed to have. And St. Louis is not a small city, it's large. And now here I am with my hands in dishwasher, washing up and trying to recover the house. I'm sure I had to work for several hours just to get the house to a resentable level. So when Randy got up the next morning, he could not look at all that and be able to concentrate on getting himself out the door because his boss is still in town. His. His boss is going to be at the office waiting for him. So he has to be on his game. I accepted that this is the life that I've chosen. But it doesn't mean it doesn't get old at times.
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Narrator
Randy and Lucas may be in a secret relationship, but Lucas still gets saddled with many of the same duties as other official military spouses. This unit picnic was a great idea.
Lucas
And you did a great job organizing it.
Randy
Thanks. We work together on everything from family to professional goals.
Lucas
Believe me, her support makes it happen.
Narrator
The Department of Defense has some words of advice for those who choose to marry into the military. What a team, huh? Quote when you marry a service member, you may find you're taking on new roles. You're probably adapting to changing schedules, learning different ways of doing things, and developing creative ways to compromise. Military spouses in dozens of ways, they.
Lucas
Help us do our best.
Narrator
Talk to military spouses and they'll tell you about enduring long periods of separation from their partners during deployments, moving every couple of years for new assignments, and learning to cope with being a long way away from family and friends. Military spouses are expected to adopt new traditions, language, codes of conduct, all the while keeping their soldiers happy, healthy and presentable. They sacrifice their careers in order to be flexible for their soldiers military career. In return for these sacrifices, military spouses receive benefits, healthcare, education, ceremony, community, and from time to time, simple gestures like celebratory dinners. But it's impossible to take advantage of those benefits when nobody knows you even exist. Unlike other military spouses, Lucas fulfills his role, supports his soldier, but has to do it all in secret. And then he has to disappear back into the shadows.
Lucas
Somebody would only do that if they loved you and what you do and believed in what you're doing. I felt terrible when Lucas had to leave because this really was his doing. What everyone was about to enjoy was his making. That's one part of it, just denying him that enjoyment. But the Deeper part, the part that hurt more is the fact that he couldn't be respected and treated equally as other spouses. And after years of him not being to participate in deployment, departure or arrival, you know, ceremonies, or the benefit of any mutual support from other military spouses and families when I was deployed. And then you add on top of that, something as optional as a social at our house, even that he couldn't participate in. And so I really felt bad that he wasn't treated as just a full partner, a full person, a full spouse. But he did this. And he never once complained, never once was bitter about it, never once said, you got to leave the military. This isn't working, or this isn't right, or I'm not doing this anymore. That's something that anyone should feel guilty about, and I certainly did.
Narrator
Randy and Lucas have always had each other when times get tough. But neither would deny that the life they've chosen is exhausting. Randy could quit, just like his brother Brett was always telling him to do. By this point in his life, Randy's served all over the world. He's worked at the White House. He's risen to the rank of colonel. It's a career anyone would have been proud of. He could leave and get a job in the private sector. And yet he stays, and Lucas has to stay hidden.
Randy
I knew that there was a part that I was missing out on, and I had accepted that, and I accepted the fact that I would never have it. But, you know, it doesn't feel. It doesn't feel good.
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President Barack Obama
This year. This year, I will work with Congress and our military to finally repeal the law that denies gay Americans the right to serve the country they love because of who they are. It's the right thing to do.
Narrator
Randy and Lucas pay close attention to President Obama's promise to end don't ask, don't tell and to lift the ban on gay people serving in the military. Pentagon leaders at today's Senate hearing stood firm in their view that don't ask.
Senator John McCain
Don'T tell should be reversed.
Narrator
This repeal would give them a chance to live normal lives, but they're afraid of getting their hopes up.
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Some lawmakers and military leaders argued that.
Narrator
It could become a distraction to troops.
Randy
On the front lines.
Lucas
In my mind's eye, I always saw myself retiring as a colonel in the closet and Lucas being unrecognized as a spouse, military spouse, for my time in service and potentially for the rest of our life, that he would never receive any of the acknowledgement or benefits that afforded all other military spouses. And so we were excited about it, but not that hopeful. We really were very doubtful. We just didn't see it happening.
Randy
President Obama made the address and it was. Another linchpin was coming into place. And it was. You could see that the foundation was started. But there's a part of me that's always been a realist and knowing that just because it's possible doesn't mean it's going to happen, that it was still a fight to make that dream a reality.
Narrator
2010, nearly two decades since President Clinton's original attempt to make the military more inclusive. What Clinton had failed to realize was just how deeply ingrained homophobia was in the military and Congress. It's maybe not surprising Clinton misread the situation. He'd never served in the military. The thing is, neither has Obama.
Lucas
We saw the kind of quagmire that occurred during the Clinton administration on this topic, and we were just wondering if this was another version of that. Now, with the Obama administration, would there be the political wherewithal for the commander in chief, the president, to see this through, especially a president like Obama and Clinton who have not served, who have not worn the cloth of this nation in a way that service members do, and would they be able to do this? It just seems so unlikely.
Narrator
But two decades after Clinton's failed attempt to lift the ban, Obama has one advantage. A sea change has taken place in public Attitudes toward gay people. In the early days of don't ask, don't Tell, AIDS was killing tens of thousands of people a year in the US and the homophobic backlash to the disease was in full swing.
Lucas
It's what Freud has called perversion and what the U.S. supreme Court has called clearly deviant activity.
Narrator
Then in 19, in 1998, a gay student named Matthew Shepard was brutally murdered in Laramie, Wyoming.
Lucas
From time to time, a single crime grabs the attention of the whole country. The latest example, the beating of a gay college student in Wyoming. 21 year old Matthew Shepard remains in critical condition after being left for dead in a field.
Narrator
The outlook for any positive change for LGBTQ people felt bleak. However, by the fall of 1998, things were beginning to shift. TV audiences were introduced to the lovable lead characters of Will and Grace. I know this guy.
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I think he might be a gay.
Narrator
But I don't know for sure.
Senator John McCain
A gay?
Narrator
What makes you think he might be a gay officer? Well, he wears shorts, he's always working out.
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Narrator
How's the ass?
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Lucas
Nice and high.
Narrator
Yeah, I'd say someone's gay. They were later followed by the stars of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.
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They're going gay.
Narrator
Oh my God.
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I can't believe this person's gay.
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The Fab Five head back into the closet.
Narrator
Toward the end of the 90s and into the early years of the new millennium, rampant and unapologetic homophobia in the media started to ebb, and gay personalities and stories were finding their way into mainstream culture. It had become impossible to ignore the positive reality of gay lives. We love them and they're no different from the day that they told you.
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Narrator
And it wasn't just cultural change. There were financial and practical pressures too. Since 2003, Don't Ask, Don't Tell had cost the US military a staggering amount in dollars, lost expertise, and ruined lives. Many thousands of highly trained personnel were drummed out in the don't ask, Don't Tell years, including more than 50 desperately needed Arabic language experts. One report placed the price tag for their replacements at $363 million. By the time Obama came into office. With the shift in public attitudes and the costs made visible, Don't Ask, Don't Tell had started to look like an expensive mistake. Nonetheless, some of the military leadership were still very much opposed to its repeal. General Peter Pace, chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, told the Chicago Tribune.
Lucas
I believe that homosexual acts between individuals are immoral in that we should not condone immoral acts.
Narrator
Opposition to Obama's plan was coming from outside the military too.
Elaine Donnelly
I'm Elaine Donnelly. I founded the center for military readiness in 1993.
Narrator
The conservative activist Elaine Donnelly had established the center for Military Readiness in her Michigan living room in response to don't ask, don't tell when the policy was first introduced. From the beginning, she fought hard to keep the military's complete ban on gay people serving in the military.
Elaine Donnelly
We would lose thousands of people if they were told under a zero tolerance policy that you must accept the new paradigm, which is forced cohabitation of men and women with homosexuals in the military. Forced cohabitation in all branches of the service, all communities. I'm talking about the infantry, special operations forces, Navy seals, cramped submarines. We are not talking about a Hollywood world here. We're talking about real consequences for real people.
Narrator
In 2008, Donnelly addressed the House Armed Services Committee suggesting that those real consequences for real people would be a serious health risk.
Elaine Donnelly
You need to think about this issue of HIV positivity. We have troops who are not deployable because of HIV positive status. The legislation to repeal the law says we should invite in everybody who was denied before. What is that going to do to our medical system? How does that encourage trust? How does that help our military to have strong discipline and morale?
Narrator
Elaine Donnelly was a civilian, but her words had influence, especially when they were amplified by Senator John McCain, a former Air Force pilot who famously was shot down over Vietnam and was tortured as a prisoner of war. Senator McCain read from a letter written by Donnelly.
Senator John McCain
Mr. Chairman, this is a letter signed by over 1,000 former general and flag officers who have weighed in on this issue. I think that we all in Congress should pay attention and benefit from the experience and knowledge of over 1000 former general officers and flag officers and which and where they say, we firmly believe that this law, which Congress passed to protect good order, discipline and morale in the unique environment of the armed forces, deserves continued support. And so I think we should also pay attention to those who have served who can speak more frankly on many occasions than those who are presently serving. I know that any decision Congress makes about the future of this law will inevitably leave a lot of people angry and unfulfilled. There are patriotic and well meaning Americans on each side of this debate and I've heard there are many passionate concerns. Ultimately, though, numerous military leaders tell me that Don't Ask, don't tell is working and that we should not change it now. I agree.
Narrator
The claim that the letter was signed by more than a thousand former generals and flag officers was later disputed, but that didn't lessen its impact in moment. As the debate raged in Washington, D.C. randy and Lucas maintained their focus on keeping their relationship secret. They couldn't risk doing anything different. Then the repeal of Don't Ask, Don't Tell was put to a vote in the House of Representatives. Mr. Speaker, today we have an opportunity to vote once again to close the door on a fundamental unfairness in our nation. Repealing the discriminatory Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy will honor the service and sacrifice of all who dedicated their lives to protecting the American people. At last, it seemed as though there might be a small flicker of hope. It had to be you.
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Narrator
You've just only heard me sing all stuffed up with nasal polyps. But now I'm on this medicine and breathing better. So this is me with less congestion.
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Narrator
Oh, this is your song. Wish I was singing after congested you.
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Do more with less nasal polyps. Ask your doctor about Dupixent.
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Narrator
It's mid December 2010.
Lucas
The yays are 250.
Narrator
The nays are 175. The motion is adopted. Without objection. The motion to reconsider is laid upon the table. The Don't Ask, Don't Tell Repeal act passes the House of Representatives and heads for a final vote in the Senate. Among those making public statements about the Senate's impending vote was superstar Lady Gaga. There are amazing heroes here today whose stories are more powerful than any story I could tell, any fight I've ever fought, and any song that I could sell. I'm here because they inspire me. I'm here because I believe in them. I'm here because don't ask, don't tell is wrong. It's unjust, and fundamentally, it is against all that we stand for as Americans. As the debate rages, Randy and Lucas future continues to hang in the balance.
Lucas
This was potentially the thing that would kind of free us up, free Lucas and I and so many others up from the weight of the daily risk of being outed.
Narrator
Since meeting in 1997, they've spent 14 years together building their secret life. They're happy, but there's no denying it. All this discretion and deception has taken its toll. Randy looks around at the walls of their home. They're empty.
Lucas
No. No notes, no love letters, no cards, no photos of us out, you know, celebrating an anniversary or something. That would be a clue that we were a couple. None of those existed. Not even in, like, the safety of our home.
Narrator
What would it be like to live here without fear? He closes his eyes, and for a brief moment, he imagines it.
Lucas
It'd be a place where we could share and present all of our memories from our experiences together. All the photos and the souvenirs and the things that were, like, real physical evidence of the story of us.
Narrator
The story of us. A story that might have a new chapter.
Lucas
What if. What if we could just live like other people? What if we could just introduce ourselves to the neighbors, invite them over for dinner? What if we could just go to the grocery store together? What if we could just, you know, have a birthday party and invite people over? So what if.
Narrator
What if Randy opens his eyes. A normal home full of people and memories. Could it be possible? That glimmer of possibility is shattered when Randy's mind darts back to the time their lives were almost demolished. And all because of a little home improvement project.
Lucas
We had purchased our first home and we just wanted to make it a place that we could feel safe in together.
Narrator
Their first home. Of course, it had to be under Randy's name. And Lucas could only live there by pretending to be Randy's younger brother. But like the nesting couple they were, they wanted to fix the place up themselves. The house was in serious disrepair. There was even water coming through the walls. Turned out it was not something they could diy. So Randy hired a contractor to do the work. It was a risk to invite anybody in, but he and Lucas had planned out how to act. They had their fake brother's routine at the ready. Should be fine. But when the contractor arrived, Randy's antenna went up.
Lucas
I felt he was watching us the whole time.
Narrator
The contractor and his crew started work. As the weeks passed, Randy suspected something was off. There was something sketchy about the guy, but they needed their house fixed. So they just held their breath and hoped.
Lucas
And at the end of the job, as I was paying him, he doubled the price on the spot. And I said, no, that's not what we agreed to. I have the quote, and that's what I'm paying. And I wrote him a check for that.
Narrator
A contractor got angry, started threatening.
Lucas
Randy said, I'm not going to pay you a nickel more. Get off my property. And then he started preparing for, like, a physical fight. And I told him I was going to call the police.
Narrator
Seems like that works and it's over. The contractor drives away. But then the phone rings at the end of the line. It's Randy's commanding officer.
Lucas
And he said, hey, we've got this call from the contractor. Do you know him? Yes. And he says, you owe money. And then they said, no, by the way, he's claiming that you're gay, and you came onto him, and he says that you somehow tried to make a pass at him that made him feel uncomfortable while he was working there.
Narrator
Randy's throat is bone dry. He can hear his heartbeat in his ears.
Lucas
Inside, I was freaking out. I was screaming in my own head, this is the end of my career. This is how it's going to end. Because this one contractor, one scam artist, has made this crazy claim that I came onto him while he was working at our house.
Narrator
But what can he say? Protest too much. You're guilty. Stay too quiet. You're guilty. Despite being so careful, he's being blackmailed for being gay. It feels as if there's no way out somehow. And Randy will never know exactly how or why. It came to nothing. Randy's commander didn't take the allegation any further. But that sense of vulnerability, it never leaves Randy. And in this moment, in this home that he's made. With Lucas still closeted, still secret, he knows that no matter what happens in the Senate with Don't Ask, don't Tell, a normal life for them is still a long way off. Coming up on Unfit for Service.
President Barack Obama
No longer will tens of thousands of Americans in uniform be asked to live a lie or look over their shoulder in order to serve the country that they love.
Lucas
I just wanted to be left alone. I didn't want the public to spectacle of this.
Randy
I very much know that we're getting ready to do something that has never been done before. This will be the first time an active duty colonel is promoted to General who is openly gay. And I say openly gay because he's barely openly gay at all.
Lucas
Sure gave me an ulcer. I just toiled over like how is this going to work? How, how can I include Lucas yet just not invite all of this drama and attention into my personal life?
Randy
And I looked at him and I said if this is too much for you, I'm okay staying in the shadows, but damn it, I earned it.
Narrator
Unfit for Service is a production of Waveland and Vespucci and is hosted by me, Eric Marcus for Waveland, the executive producer is Jason Hoke. For Vespucci, the executive producers are Daniel Turkin and Johnny Galvin. The series producer is Rachel Byrne. The story editors are Matt Willis and Thomas Curry with additional script editing by Sara Burningham. Thomas Curry is the Managing Producer. Audio recording by Catherine Cook at CDM Sound Studios. Sound design by Arlie Adlington and Alex Portfelix. Audio mix by Alex Portfelix Follow Waveland on Instagram at Waveland Media. If you love the show, please don't forget to leave a review and make sure you tell your friends. Thanks for listening.
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Podcast Summary: Unfit For Service
Episode: The Vote | Chapter 7
Release Date: November 25, 2024
Host: Eric Marcus
Production: Wavland and Vespucci
In Episode 7: The Vote of the Unfit For Service series, host Eric Marcus delves into the poignant and challenging journey of Randy Taylor and his partner Lucas as they navigate life under the restrictive Don't Ask, Don't Tell (DADT) policy in the United States military. This episode explores the personal struggles, sacrifices, and the overarching impact of military policies on LGBTQ+ service members and their families.
The episode begins with a historical overview of the DADT policy, highlighting President Barack Obama's 2010 State of the Union address where he promised to repeal the ban on gay individuals serving in the military. Narrator reflects on previous efforts, notably President Bill Clinton's unsuccessful attempt nearly two decades earlier, which resulted in the perpetuation of secrecy and discrimination under the guise of the policy.
Narrator (03:10): "President Barack Obama is giving his first ever State of the Union address. He promises to repeal the ban on gay men and women serving in the military this year."
Despite repeated promises, structural and cultural barriers within the military hindered progress, leading to continued marginalization of LGBTQ+ service members.
Randy Taylor, a dedicated soldier, and Lucas share a deeply intimate relationship that must remain concealed due to the DADT policy. As Randy rises to the rank of colonel, the pressures of military life intensify, making it increasingly difficult to maintain their secrecy.
Randy (05:37): "I would mow the grass, but know that I had to be back inside by 4:00 because his deputy lived a mile away and routinely walked past our house with his wife. So I was never outside in the front yard after 4 o'clock in the afternoon. You know, it was challenging."
Their home becomes a battleground for maintaining appearances. Lucas grapples with isolation, constrained by curfews and the constant need to erase any trace of their true relationship before unexpected visitors.
Randy (06:27): "Luckily, Randy and I wear the same size clothing, so our clothes, it just made. If someone wandered into our closet, they would think, wow, he's got a lot of clothes."
The episode highlights the immense burden placed on military spouses like Lucas, who must perform countless duties behind the scenes without recognition or support. From organizing high-stakes military events to managing household responsibilities alone, Lucas exemplifies the silent sacrifices made by many.
Lucas (12:21): "So I accepted that this is the life that I've chosen. But it doesn't mean it doesn't get old at times."
A pivotal moment unfolds when a routine home improvement project threatens to expose their relationship. An altercation with a contractor leads to false allegations of harassment, illustrating the precariousness of living under DADT.
Lucas (37:07): "And he says that you owe money. And then they said, no, by the way, he's claiming that you're gay, and you came onto him, and he says that you somehow tried to make a pass at him that made him feel uncomfortable while he was working there."
This incident deepens Randy's sense of vulnerability, reinforcing the ever-present danger of being outed despite meticulous efforts to remain hidden.
As public opinion shifts and financial analyses reveal the costly repercussions of DADT—mounting to an estimated $363 million in lost expertise and forced separations—the Senate prepares to vote on the repeal. The episode captures the tense atmosphere surrounding this pivotal moment.
Lucas (20:07): "In my mind's eye, I always saw myself retiring as a colonel in the closet and Lucas being unrecognized as a spouse, military spouse, for my time in service and potentially for the rest of our life."
Despite opposition from military leaders and conservative activists like Senator John McCain and Elaine Donnelly, who argue that repeal could disrupt military cohesion and readiness, there remains a flicker of hope among service members and their families.
Randy (20:46): "President Obama made the address and it was. Another linchpin was coming into place. And it was. You could see that the foundation was started."
Lady Gaga's public support further galvanizes the movement, symbolizing broader societal acceptance and the pressing need for policy change.
Lady Gaga (31:35): "There are amazing heroes here today whose stories are more powerful than any story I could tell, any fight I've ever fought, and any song that I could sell."
The culmination of political and personal battles leaves Randy and Lucas contemplating the future. The potential repeal of DADT represents not just a policy shift but a chance for personal freedom and recognition.
Lucas (32:49): "This was potentially the thing that would kind of free us up, free Lucas and I and so many others up from the weight of the daily risk of being outed."
However, the past experiences of discrimination and the traumatic incident with the contractor linger, casting doubts on the immediacy and completeness of the forthcoming changes.
Randy (40:02): "This will be the first time an active duty colonel is promoted to General who is openly gay. And I say openly gay because he's barely openly gay at all."
The emotional toll of maintaining their concealed relationship is palpable, underscoring the profound personal costs of systemic discrimination.
Lucas (34:22): "What if we could just live like other people? What if we could just introduce ourselves to the neighbors, invite them over for dinner?"
The Vote | Chapter 7 serves as a compelling narrative that intertwines personal sacrifice with broader social and political movements. Randy and Lucas's story is emblematic of the countless LGBTQ+ service members who have endured systemic barriers in their pursuit of serving their country authentically.
As the Senate prepares for the final vote on repealing DADT, the episode leaves listeners with a sense of cautious optimism tempered by the reality of ongoing challenges. The potential for change heralds a new chapter not only for Randy and Lucas but for the integrity and inclusivity of the U.S. military as a whole.
Oscar Obama (39:45): "No longer will tens of thousands of Americans in uniform be asked to live a lie or look over their shoulder in order to serve the country that they love."
Randy (05:37): "I would mow the grass, but know that I had to be back inside by 4:00 because his deputy lived a mile away and routinely walked past our house with his wife. So I was never outside in the front yard after 4 o'clock in the afternoon. You know, it was challenging." (05:37)
Lucas (12:21): "So I accepted that this is the life that I've chosen. But it doesn't mean it doesn't get old at times." (12:21)
Lucas (37:07): "And he says that you owe money. And then they said, no, by the way, he's claiming that you're gay, and you came onto him, and he says that you somehow tried to make a pass at him that made him feel uncomfortable while he was working there." (37:07)
Lucas (20:07): "In my mind's eye, I always saw myself retiring as a colonel in the closet and Lucas being unrecognized as a spouse, military spouse, for my time in service and potentially for the rest of our life." (20:07)
Randy (40:02): "This will be the first time an active duty colonel is promoted to General who is openly gay. And I say openly gay because he's barely openly gay at all." (40:02)
Oscar Obama (39:45): "No longer will tens of thousands of Americans in uniform be asked to live a lie or look over their shoulder in order to serve the country that they love." (39:45)
The Vote | Chapter 7 masterfully captures the intersection of personal lives and institutional policies, shedding light on the resilience and unwavering commitment of individuals like Randy and Lucas. As societal attitudes continue to evolve, the episode serves as both a historical account and a call to action for continued advocacy and understanding within the military and beyond.