Joy Bomb: Family, Faith & Purpose (feat. Tauren Wells)

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Joy Bomb: Family, Faith & Purpose" (feat. Tauren Wells)
Unlocked with Savannah Chrisley
Release Date: April 29, 2025

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Introduction

In this enlightening episode of Unlocked with Savannah Chrisley, Savannah engages in a heartfelt conversation with Tauren Wells, a renowned singer, songwriter, and author. The discussion delves deep into Tauren's journey of faith, family, and purpose, offering listeners profound insights into overcoming personal struggles and embracing authentic joy.

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Discussing "Joy Bomb" and Its Themes

[01:01] Tauren Wells:
"Joy Bomb is really just how to Unleash Jesus's Explosive Joy for an Extraordinary Life."

Tauren introduces his latest book, Joy Bomb: Family, Faith & Purpose, emphasizing the transformative power of Jesus’s joy. Drawing inspiration from Matthew 5 and the Sermon on the Mount, Tauren explores how genuine happiness and fulfillment are rooted in a relationship with Christ, contrasting worldly definitions of joy.

[02:02] Tauren Wells:
"Accepting the reality that even though you're following Jesus, you're going to experience difficult things... in joy that we find our strength."

He discusses the inevitability of facing hardships despite one's faith and the importance of anchoring joy in Christ to withstand adversities. Tauren warns against tethering joy to anything external, highlighting that true joy remains untouchable when rooted in a divine connection.

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Tauren's Journey from Ministry to Music and Back

[05:05] Tauren Wells:
"I felt a call to ministry... started touring in a group there, started a band."

Tauren recounts his early days in student ministry and the evolution of his musical career. Transitioning from church-based ministry to being signed by Sony, he shares the challenges of balancing his spiritual calling with the demands of the music industry. His pivotal moment came with the release of "Hills and Valleys," which significantly impacted his life, leading him to tour with legendary artists like Lionel Richie and Mariah Carey.

[06:37] Tauren Wells:
"I put out a song called 'Hills and Valleys,' and my whole life kind of changed over the course of the next year."

Despite the external success, Tauren felt a persistent inner calling to serve more directly within the local church, ultimately leading him to establish his own church, Church of Whitestone, in Austin, Texas.

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Challenges of Maintaining Faith Amidst Success

[14:29] Tauren Wells:
"The pace of that, the exposure of that, the opportunities... outpace the development of my character and my ability to be honest, to be transparent, to be vulnerable."

Tauren opens up about the internal struggles that accompany fame and success. The rapid rise in his career often left his personal growth lagging, creating a disconnect between his public persona and private struggles. This tension fueled feelings of being broken and unsure of how to handle destructive habits.

[15:32] Host:
"Not only do you have a wife and a child, but you also are at a place with yourself of feeling lost."

Savannah empathizes, sharing her own experiences of maintaining public personas despite personal vulnerabilities, highlighting the universal challenge of balancing outward appearances with inner truths.

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Parenting and Raising Sons in a Faith-Focused Home

[21:06] Tauren Wells:
"What's important to us primarily is that our kids love the Lord... we're not raising boys, we're raising men."

Tauren emphasizes the significance of instilling a love for the Lord in his children. He and his wife prioritize creating a loving, compassionate, and disciplined household where their sons can discover and nurture their unique gifts and talents. The couple views parenting as their foremost ministry, aiming to raise men of consequence who will positively impact the world.

[23:49] Host:
"I'm raising young men... they're gonna ask to take me out to dinner, they're gonna fill out the check."

Savannah echoes Tauren's sentiment, sharing anecdotes about teaching her friends' children essential life skills and manners, underscoring the importance of proactive and intentional parenting.

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Overcoming Personal Struggles and Finding Joy

[31:09] Host:
"It's so hard for people to let the pride go and to say like, hey, I really need some help."
[31:30] Tauren Wells:
"Pain sometimes forces you to be like, do you want to lose your life or do you want to keep going."

The conversation shifts to coping mechanisms for personal pain and the transformative power of acknowledging and processing emotions. Tauren discusses how unaddressed pain can manifest in various aspects of life, affecting relationships and personal growth. He advocates for embracing vulnerability through faith, prayer, and community as pathways to healing and genuine joy.

[35:12] Host:
"I feel like it's kind of that, like you're going out on stage saying and doing all these things, and in a way, like, you want people to feel that way... but you can't accept it yourself."

Savannah shares her own journey of overcoming bitterness and anger through therapy and faith, aligning with Tauren's message of processing emotions to prevent hardened hearts and repetitive cycles of pain.

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Final Thoughts and Advice

[29:06] Host:
"The more people you talk to, the more you hear that they're the experts in advanced micro laser fat removal..."
(Note: This segment appears to be part of an advertisement and is excluded from the content summary.)

Returning to core discussions, Tauren offers guidance for listeners grappling with faith and personal struggles, emphasizing humility, service, and the importance of seeking counsel.

[43:07] Tauren Wells:
"There will be no perfect institutions... we have to have community. You have to be connected to people."

He reassures those who have been hurt by religious institutions that while people and organizations are imperfect, the essence of faith—community and divine love—remains steadfast. Tauren encourages listeners to seek genuine connections and to view their faith journey as a personal relationship with Jesus, separate from institutional flaws.

[45:53] Host:
"Joy Bomb has been on repeat... one of my favorite songs."

As the episode concludes, Savannah expresses her admiration for Tauren's work, particularly his song "Joy in the Morning," which encapsulates the episode's themes of finding joy amidst life's challenges.

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Conclusion

In "Joy Bomb: Family, Faith & Purpose," Savannah Chrisley and Tauren Wells explore the intricate interplay between faith, personal struggles, and family life. Tauren's candid reflections on his journey offer listeners a roadmap to embracing authentic joy rooted in a deep relationship with Jesus, navigating the complexities of success, and fostering meaningful familial relationships. The episode serves as both an intimate conversation and a source of inspiration for those seeking to align their lives with purpose and genuine happiness.

Notable Quotes:

• Tauren Wells [01:01]:
  "Joy Bomb is really just how to Unleash Jesus's Explosive Joy for an Extraordinary Life."

• Tauren Wells [02:02]:
  "Accepting the reality that even though you're following Jesus, you're going to experience difficult things... in joy that we find our strength."

• Tauren Wells [14:29]:
  "The pace of that, the exposure of that, the opportunities... outpace the development of my character and my ability to be honest, to be transparent, to be vulnerable."

• Tauren Wells [21:06]:
  "What's important to us primarily is that our kids love the Lord... we're not raising boys, we're raising men."

• Tauren Wells [31:30]:
  "Pain sometimes forces you to be like, do you want to lose your life or do you want to keep going."

• Tauren Wells [43:07]:
  "There will be no perfect institutions... we have to have community. You have to be connected to people."

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Release Announcement:

Tauren Wells's book "Joy Bomb" is officially released on May 20th. Listeners are encouraged to pre-order and secure their copies through various platforms, including Amazon and Barnes & Noble.

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End of Summary

Transcript

[Torin Wells]

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[Host]

Double cheeseburger and add a McChicken for a dollar.

[Torin Wells]

Because saving with deals is always on the menu. With new MCvalue, prices and participation may vary.

[Announcer]

Valid for item of equal or lesser value.

[Host]

Welcome back to this week's episode of Unlocked. I'm super excited for today's episode because we have Torin Wells on. Thank you. Did I say your name right?

[Torin Wells]

You sure did.

[Host]

Thank goodness.

[Torin Wells]

So good. So many people mess it up so much. Taryn. Terrence Tar. But that's it. Lauren with the T. I love it.

[Host]

Well, let me tell you, first off, your music has been, like, one of the most healing things for me. And the messages and your voice and everything about it is just such a godsend.

[Torin Wells]

Wow. Thank you. I really appreciate that.

[Host]

It truly is. So tell me. Well, first off, your book.

[Torin Wells]

Yeah.

[Host]

Give us a little insight into it. And then we're really going into it. Then we're really.

[Torin Wells]

Well, Joy Bomb is really just how to Unleash Jesus Explosive Joy for an Extraordinary Life. That's the subtitle, at least. But I was just. I was reading through Matthew 5 a few years back, and it just hit me like it was the first time that what Jesus was talking about in his famous Sermon on the Mount was actually happiness and how our happiness matters to God and how he has created a way for us to experience fulfillment, contentment, joy, peace in a totally different way than the world. And at times, even spiritual culture has showed us how to experience joy.

[Host]

Well, yeah, I think it's also hard for people to experience joy in the midst of turmoil. And I think that's also a big message.

[Torin Wells]

Yes.

[Host]

Is how. How do you do that?

[Torin Wells]

Yeah. Well, first of all, like, accepting the reality that even though you're following Jesus, you're going to experience difficult things. Really, really, really hard stuff. And that's actually why he has given us the power of his joy, because it's in joy that we find our strength. That's why we have to be so careful of what our joy is actually connected to. Because if it's connected to anything outside of Jesus, it's vulnerable to the enemy's attacks. And if it's vulnerable to be attacked, it will be attacked.

[Host]

Yes.

[Torin Wells]

But if your joy is hidden in Christ, then the enemy has to actually go through Jesus to get to your joy. And so by my hope with this is that we don't even put our confidence in an idea or an ideal. And I wrote these chapters as codes. It's not so much putting your faith in a code, it's putting your faith in a person, the person of Jesus, and realizing that he actually gives you permission to walk through difficult things and say, this is really hard right now, and to cry your tears and not feel guilty like, I'm supposed to have joy. Why am I crying? No. Through these Beatitudes, Jesus actually gave us permission to feel our feelings, not fake them. And the gospel works just as well in those spaces. So that's what we're kind of pointing people to.

[Host]

I absolutely love that. So where can people find your book?

[Torin Wells]

Everywhere.

[Host]

Everywhere?

[Torin Wells]

Yes.

[Host]

Amazon bookstores, everywhere.

[Torin Wells]

Anywhere books are sold, you can pick it up and, you know, got to be fair to all of our partners out there. So you can go anywhere, but you can pre order it and order it on Amazon be to your house. But so fun fact. I actually worked at Barnes and Noble in high school.

[Host]

Did you really? I feel like Barnes and Noble was such a staple back in the day.

[Torin Wells]

It was. For me, it was like, status. I work at Barnes and Noble.

[Host]

Yes. Like, that's like where you went and hung out with all your friends and you. Like, that was the cool.

[Torin Wells]

It was a vibe. Coffee shop in there before. Coffee shop were like, on every corner and cool. So it's cool. We're going to be doing a partnership with them. But my book will be on the bookshelf that I used to stock, which is. That's a crazy thing.

[Host]

Can we get a video of you, like, stocking the shelf with your book?

[Torin Wells]

Absolutely, I think.

[Host]

Can you put on, like, your little.

[Torin Wells]

The Barnes and Noble lanyard. Yes, yes. And I sold a lot of Barnes and Noble memberships, too, because there's a star chart in the back and I'm an achiever. So I was selling memberships. I was singing in behind the counter. Anything to sell a book.

[Host]

But stop. Okay, so how did you go from stocking the shelves at Barnes and Noble to being like a hit singer songwriter book? How did that happen?

[Torin Wells]

Well, definitely, because now I can't picture.

[Host]

You as anything other than a Barnes and Noble.

[Torin Wells]

Yeah, well, that's. And I'm honored by that. You know, to be viewed as a bookworm. I love that. Well, I was in. In school, high school, Battle Creek Central High School in Battle Creek, Michigan, and was working in my student ministry there at my local church and just felt a call to ministry. And so I didn't know what that looked like. I didn't know what that meant. You know, I had a Great student pastor. So I knew that, like, if you were in ministry, you could work at a church or whatever. So I was. I felt, called to student ministry, which would be like, you know, ministry for. For young people. And went to Bible college.

[Host]

Okay.

[Torin Wells]

And started touring in a group there, started a band there. And then when everybody was graduating, you know, with their theology degrees and their missiology degrees and all of that, me and the guys were like, we're going to be a band, and we're just going to drive around and travel and play music for people. And people kind of laughed at us. Well, we ended up getting signed. We got signed to Sony.

[Host]

Wow.

[Torin Wells]

And I did that for five or six years and felt God calling me away from the band to really plant in the local church. And so I started working at my local church full time and then also signed a solo deal.

[Host]

Okay.

[Torin Wells]

With. With the record label unexpectedly. And then I put out a song called Hills and Valleys, and my whole life kind of changed over the course of the next year. Went on tour with Lionel Richie, Mariah Carey.

[Host]

Wow.

[Torin Wells]

Opened up for them. And all along in my heart was this desire to serve people in local church ministry. And so I stayed on staff my whole music career until a couple years ago, we planted our own church. Wow. It's been a while.

[Host]

So you have your own church now. And what is that?

[Torin Wells]

It's called Church of Whitestone.

[Host]

Okay.

[Torin Wells]

Yep. In Austin, Texas.

[Host]

Wow. That's amazing.

[Torin Wells]

Yeah. We started it January of 24.

[Host]

Holy cow. And how. How is it?

[Torin Wells]

It's unbelievable.

[Host]

How many members do you have now?

[Torin Wells]

Well, we say vision owners are better than members.

[Host]

Okay. All right.

[Torin Wells]

Because you'll. You'll know this.

[Host]

I say, my grandfather's a Southern Baptist minister.

[Torin Wells]

Okay.

[Host]

So.

[Torin Wells]

So he's going to understand this when I say members like to show up and complain and criticize, but vision owners like to contribute and celebrate.

[Host]

Oh, I love that.

[Torin Wells]

Yeah. So we shifted the language so we got vision owners. We average about 2,000 people a weekend.

[Host]

That's amazing. Like, just, holy cow. Good for you.

[Torin Wells]

Yeah. Crazy. God's favor, a blessing on it. It's been phenomenal, but that's where my heart has been kind of all along. And God has just, you know, step by step opened the doors.

[Host]

And so when it comes to music, what would you say is the song. So obviously you said the song that, like, started it all, but what song would you say has had the most impact on you? Or maybe a song that you wrote just when you didn't know where else to turn?

[Torin Wells]

Yeah, definitely. The song Known.

[Host]

Okay.

[Torin Wells]

Yeah. Which I write about it a bit in the book, but that song, I'm very much an achievement oriented, performer oriented person, and my identity was wrapped up in my accomplishments and my image and how people perceived me. And that became a prisoner.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Torin Wells]

You know, 30. 31. I was kind of unraveling on the inside.

[Host]

And how old are you now?

[Torin Wells]

39. 39. Yeah. Yeah.

[Host]

Cool. Okay.

[Torin Wells]

Yeah. Beige don't age. I dying rather stay smooth. But that.

[Host]

And I say dear heavens to him being 39 because he has four kids.

[Torin Wells]

Yeah.

[Host]

And he does not look like he could have four kids, so. But continue. You felt like you were unraveling. It was 31.

[Torin Wells]

Yeah. Inside of my own prison that I built to protect an image that Jesus didn't even actually die for. He didn't die for, like, the best version of me. The. The. The so called perfect version of me or the version of me that I was projecting. I realized he died for who I really was so that I could have a real relationship with him, not just do stuff for him.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Torin Wells]

And I thought, like, a lot of my. And it was innocent, I think, and my heart was pure. In my upbringing, I wanted to be used by God, you know, like, use me, use my life. Like, if I can be of any value to the kingdom, use me. And I think it's a good. Slightly good thing to pray, but it's so much better to say, like, God, I just want to be with you, like, understanding that you're loved by him. There's a Timothy Keller quote. It says, to be loved but not known is comforting, but it's superficial. To be known and not loved is our greatest fear. But to be fully known and truly loved is a lot like how being loved by God feels.

[Host]

Wow.

[Torin Wells]

And so I kind of had this, like, reckoning with myself of, I'm more than my last achievement. I'm more than my presentation of perfection. Like, God really loves me, and he took into account all of my shortcomings and all of my failures when he made up his mind about me.

[Host]

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[Torin Wells]

I think definitely the advancement that God's favor and the gifts that he'd given me, like, the pace of that, the exposure of that, the opportunities that come with that outpace the development of my character and my. Develop my. My ability to be honest, to be transparent, to be vulnerable. And that's where the tension was. It was like, I'm going out on stage, I'm being this big Christian. I'm telling all of this stuff, but inside I'm broken. I don't know how to deal with my feelings. I don't know how to deal with myself. I don't know how to deal with these destructive habits that I have, like, how do I actually become free from those things? And so that was. I mean, I was married at 24. We had our first son when I was 26. And that's like, young. That is.

[Host]

Yes.

[Torin Wells]

And so at that time, things kind of start popping off, too. And so you have.

[Host]

Not only do you have a wife and a child, but you also are at a place with yourself of feeling lost. And I think to compare it of, like, even just me growing up on tv, in the public eye, social media, there were so many times, and even to this day, I will say that, like, I post a quote or something encouraging, and I don't believe it. Not that I don't believe it, but I can't accept it for myself. But I still push it out to other people because I hope they can accept it. Yes, I feel like it's kind of that, like you're going out on stage saying and doing all these things, and in a way, like, you want people to feel that way and you want them to feel that love and acceptance, but you can't accept it yourself. So at times I feel like there's some anger and resentment that can go.

[Torin Wells]

Along with that because we've mistaken our identity as someone that God is just supposed to use, not someone that God actually loves. So I'm doing what God wants me to do when I'm telling other people they can be free and healed and encouraged and filled with hope. But the space between that is God's using me. But we don't really believe God loves us, and that's the greatest revelation that we can receive. That's why there's that story in the Bible where a man is believing for healing for his child. And Jesus says, well, all things are possible if you believe. And he says, lord, I believe, but help my unbelief. Now, this is just my thinking about that scripture. I think he was saying, I believe that you can do all these things for everyone else. But my daughter needs to be healed. And I'm not sure if you care as much about her as you care about everyone else. And I think that's one of the last strongholds that the grace of God breaks in our lives. And we're opened up to his power when we realize, no, God loves me. Yeah, he wants to care for my heart. He wants to pour his love into my life. And that what is true for all of these people is true for me as well.

[Host]

But how do. How would you say you keep the faith and the waiting? Because I think in that situation, I would say, like, even for myself now, I'm like, all right. With my parents situation with all these things, I'm like, all right, why is all this stuff happening for other people? Like, when is it gonna be my turn? You know? And it's so hard to keep the faith and the waiting.

[Torin Wells]

Yeah, that's the hard part. That's where we need a new framework for favor, because you've experienced a lot of favor in your life. I've experienced a lot of favor. The thing about favor is when heaven points to you, everyone recognizes it. For the good and the bad. That Job is a perfect story. I write about this in the book. But Job had favor on his life. And the devil essentially goes to God and says, well, remove this hedge of protection from around him and let me mess with his kids, let me mess with his income, let me mess with his house, let me mess with his friends, and I promise you, he will turn away from you. The thing is, God promoted Job for that test. When the Bible says that the enemy was looking for someone to devour, God said, have you considered Job? So in the moment that he expressed his favor over Job's life, the enemy was now aware. And so that's why people that have God's doing something in your life, you're experiencing breakthroughs. You're getting promotions. God's elevating you. It's not just that you're getting the world's attention. You're getting the attention. There's now a target on you. And so we need a new framework for favor. We don't know how we get it. The Bible doesn't really even say how you experience the favorite of God. But we know how to lose it. The Bible says that God opposes the proud and that the humble, he exalts. So in the waiting, we have to take on the posture of humility. In the favor, we have to realize that our strength is not for Status. It's for service that God puts us in places to declare his glory and to pull other people toward hope and healing. And so if you can take your eyes off of yourself and. And give yourself permission to ask God why. I think a lot of times we don't want to question God. Yeah, you get to ask him why. You get to ask God, why is this happening? Why is this happening in my family? Why. Why am I walking through this situation? But you can't stay on. Why? You gotta get. You gotta get into what? What are you showing me? What are you teaching me? And then the next place that level you graduate to is, who. Who are you turning me into? Who are you transforming me into? Even through some things that I don't understand.

[Host]

That is amazing. That is so true. So your kids. How old are your sons?

[Torin Wells]

So I've got Canaan. He's 12. Lawson, nine. Navy, seven. Banner, four.

[Host]

Holy.

[Torin Wells]

Canaan Lawson, Navy Banner. Yep.

[Host]

That's insane. So what would you say now, teaching them, like, when you have children? And I will say, just like, since I got my brother and sister, I view life so much differently. I say when you have, like, two children to look at, you really question yourself and your decisions and the way you move about life. And things are just different. Things are important to you now. And what would you say, especially about raising young men? Yeah, how. What is. What's your parenting style? What do you guys feel?

[Torin Wells]

Well, what's important to us primarily is that our kids love the Lord. And I heard someone say this recently, and it was so good. It was a woman. She said, sometimes our kids walk away from church not because of the church they grew up in, but because of the house they grew up in. And we blame.

[Host]

Say that again.

[Torin Wells]

A lot of our kids leave the church not because of the church they grew up in, but because of the house they grew up in. And it challenged me. You know, my wife and I as pastors, like, we have an amazing church. Are there difficulties and things to work through? Of course. But the greatest testimony that what we believe works is if it works in our house, not just if it works on Sunday. And so how patient are we with each other, with the boys? How kind, how loving, how compassionate. You know, the truth, Discipline, humility, service, all of these things that's really built into our family culture. I want our boys to know we as a family are on a mission. Like, we have. We're like the Avengers. God, like, called us to a purpose, and every one of them has unique gifts and talents. And we want to unlock those abilities. We don't want to lock them into society's structures of what success looks like. When I would say even God has broken a lot of what I thought was conventional success in my own mind through my own story, you know, so finding their own path and surrounding them with love, but also teaching these dudes. Like, we say this a lot. We're not raising boys, we're raising men.

[Host]

Thank you, thank you, thank you. I. Nothing. So I have friends who say the same thing. Like, one of my girlfriends, she has a little girl, but she has. I think it's two boys as well. And she said, she's like, I'm raising young men. Like, they're gonna ask to take me out to dinner. They're gonna fill out the check. They're going to pay. They're going to, like. She teaches them, literally. I think they're like seven years old. Seven and maybe nine. And they do it. And it's the coolest thing, because I don't think enough people do that.

[Torin Wells]

And they crave it. They want it. They want the independence. It doesn't show up like that all the time, you know, but having them. You roll up to the drive through, order your own food. You want to go get something, go in there and pay for it. Here's the money. Have interactions with people, look people in the eye, shake their hand. Like, I'm just teaching them stuff my parents taught me. Old school stuff. Yes, ma'am. No, ma'am. Yes, sir. No, sir, please. Thank you. Does your laundry go on the floor in front of the laundry basket, or does it actually go in the laundry basket? Do you have two legs? Just because you have a crack in your behind doesn't mean your legs are broken. Go get that laundry and carry it to the. So it's just. And it is exhausting.

[Host]

It is.

[Torin Wells]

I wish my wife was on here to testify. It is way more exhausting to train your kids than it is to just do everything. Yeah, that's tiring, too.

[Host]

But it's easier because then it's just like, all right, let me just do it. Let me just do it.

[Torin Wells]

Exactly. I'll do it and it'll be done. It'll be done the way I want it.

[Host]

Exactly. Instead of it being done and then you having to say, nope, go do it again.

[Torin Wells]

Yes.

[Host]

Is it right?

[Torin Wells]

Yes.

[Host]

All right, y'all. If you've been listening to Unlocked. Well, first off, thank you. And second off, you know how much I have been raving about G Defy Shoes. My grandmother has been loving them. I have been loving them. I mean we all love them. And you know, I don't just throw out random brand names. I have to try them for myself first. And while I can't stop talking about them, they are not only super comfortable but also super stylish. And when it comes to how comfortable they are, they literally take the pressure off your knees, feet, your whole body. They have this tech inside called Verso shock technology that literally absorbs shock when you walk. I mean you can truly feel it working. Your body doesn't feel beat up after being on your feet all day. So if you're on your feet all day, these are for you. Busy moms, anyone who works long hours or just someone who doesn't want their feet screaming by 4pm Honestly, they are perfect for working out, traveling or just running errands. And they actually look cute too. Thank goodness there are a bunch of styles so you don't have to sacrifice looking good for feeling good. I've worn mine out and people have asked me what they are. That never happens with comfort shoes. So head over to g.com and use my code UNLOCKED to get 30% off orders over $120. Or you can text my code UNLOCKED to 91888 for 30% off orders over$120. Free shipping 60 day trial. So if you don't love them there free returns, give your feet a break because let's face it, you deserve it. This week's episode of Unlocked is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Fiscally responsible financial geniuses, monetary magicians. These are things people say about drivers who switch their car insurance to Progressive and save hundreds because Progressive offers discounts for paying in full, owning a home and more. Plus you can count on their great customer service to help you when you need it. So your dollar goes a long. Visit progressive.com to see if you could save on car insurance. Progressive Casualty Insurance company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states or situations. But I think too it's that's what I say. Like the biggest investment we make are children and like they are what we leave behind.

[Torin Wells]

Yes.

[Host]

So it really causes or it should cause people to question how they're interacting with their children, how they're parenting their children or whatever it may be.

[Torin Wells]

Yeah. One guy said your greatest contribution to the world may not be something you do, but someone you raise. And I think that there needs to be a rediscovery of the divine calling of raising up children who become men and women of consequence. People who change the world because they're there. And this is something that's been so hard for me and my wife. We're both very much go getters. Build it from the ground up. Let's see what we can accomplish, even for God, which makes it feel a lot more noble. But our first ministry is to our home. It's to our boys. And long after the show is gone and the songs are gone and the books are gone and all of these things and the people are gone, we are going to have these human souls, minds, hearts that we were responsible to cultivate.

[Host]

Yes.

[Torin Wells]

And that just weighs so much more than anything else we're chasing.

[Host]

I also think too, what you just said, like, that's your next book.

[Torin Wells]

Come on.

[Host]

Hey, I'm telling you, that's your next book.

[Torin Wells]

Well, if this one does okay, maybe I'll get to write another one.

[Host]

It's gonna do great.

[Torin Wells]

I know it well, because I'm on your show. See it.

[Host]

We got a good chance.

[Torin Wells]

We got a good chance.

[Host]

I'll take it.

[Torin Wells]

Come on.

[Host]

No, but there's not enough guidance out here. Like, you see all these par books, that's like, feed your kids this, don't feed them that, do whatever. But you see nothing about, like, raising your children in a Christlike home environment around the right people. Like, I don't think you see any of that.

[Torin Wells]

There's not a lot. There's some.

[Host]

And we all need some guidance. Like, I feel like even for people who. That I would argue that the majority of the people in this world want to raise their kids that way.

[Torin Wells]

Yes.

[Host]

But they just don't know how to.

[Torin Wells]

Don't know where to start.

[Host]

Yeah, they don't know where to start. Maybe they weren't raised that way. They didn't have that guidance. But they want it for their kids because you always want better than what you had for your children. So I think. I mean, heck, I would. I'm like, I'll take all the guidance in the world.

[Torin Wells]

Yeah, absolutely. I believe this. Goats. The goats. The greatest of all time. The Michael Jordans, the Tom Brady's, the Wayne Gretzky's. They're coached. They, like, seek out coaching. And I think you can call it counseling, you can call it therapy, you can call it coaching, whatever you want. But there is so much value in an outside perspective allowing you to see what you just can't see when you're in it, no matter what, whether that's what you need to do for work or in a relationship or with your children or, you know, next steps. We Always benefit. The Bible says there's a, there's safety in a multitude of counsel. We should be craving those voices that help us make less mistakes.

[Host]

That is so true. Cause I just know all the times like I've reached out for help and to therapy and all these retreats, whatever, it does nothing but better you. But it's so hard for people to let the pride go and to say like, hey, I really need some help.

[Torin Wells]

Yes.

[Host]

Have you found yourself in moments like that?

[Torin Wells]

Oh yeah, absolutely. That's. I mean, was it perpetually and that like 30, 100%?

[Host]

How did you turn things around?

[Torin Wells]

Well, pain. Pain sometimes forces you to be like, well, do you want to lose your life or do you want to keep going? So, and unfortunately for a lot of hard headed people like me, it takes pain. And so I just got to the point where I was like, I don't, the other thing is I don't want to be a slave.

[Host]

No.

[Torin Wells]

Like I don't want, even unknowingly, any pain that we go through is present, even if it's unprocessed. So you still, you still have.

[Host]

Your body keeps the score.

[Torin Wells]

Yes. Unprocessed pain is still affecting you. And we like to act like, no, I'm over that. That doesn't matter. It's like we guard our hearts with apathy like, oh, I didn't need them anyways. I didn't need that situation, that job. They didn't understand me, they didn't value me. And we put all of this unprocessed pain, but it's still on the hard drive.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Torin Wells]

And so I like, this is kind of an easy framework for it. So you're 17, you go through an emotional breakup and you know, everybody's telling you, oh, you're 17, this breakup doesn't matter. That person doesn't matter.

[Host]

You're gonna be over it.

[Torin Wells]

Yes. But the seed of rejection is sown. And then you're 27 in your relationship and you've been through 19 relationships and none of them work out because you always get to a certain point and then you break it off because you never processed the pain as a 17 year old. And then maybe you don't have any relationships because you won't even allow yourself to be in that emotional, vulnerable state because you're being driven by your subconscious. You are a slave to the pain that you do not process. And so spirituality, faith, particularly faith in Jesus, is making the subconscious conscious by the prompting of the Holy Spirit by reading things like Joy Bomb, by reading the Bible, by Prayer community where you actually get what you're dealing with out loud. You know what? I went through rejection when I was 17 and I haven't realized it, but it's affected every relationship that I've had up to this point because I never processed it.

[Host]

It.

[Torin Wells]

You had a family member pass away and you thought, I'm just going to fake it till I make it. Yeah, you never process it. And so you have wounds and you're bleeding on everyone and you're the only one who doesn't know it. And so people in your life for a short time and then they're out and you. And you put it on them, well, they just can't, they can't grind at my pace. They can't keep up knowing that the reason why you have to grind at this pace is because you're running from pain you haven't processed. And that's why Jesus says in Matthew 5, he says, Happy are those who mourn for they will be comforted. First of all, he's giving us permission to feel our pain. Yeah, permission to process the rejection. Because if we will process it, he can heal it. And we're no longer a slave to our wounds. We get to testify of the scars and say I'm not what I've been through. Let me help you through it.

[Host]

I literally just like I felt this so deeply like in my life recently. I mean I'm almost 28. I've gone through so much, especially the past few years, but I going through a breakup like two months ago, got like totally blindsided. And as I'm going through it, like old me would have been like so angry and bitter and just like just bitter honestly. And then. But through all the work that I've done and the therapy and just like getting back into church, all the things, I in a way rejoiced in it because I was like, wow. I love the fact that I was able to love someone so much that it hurt me so bad. And so it's like being able to process it in a way like that, it's truly processing it. Because if you get bitter and angry, your heart just gets hardened and you become a person you don't want to be.

[Torin Wells]

That's right.

[Host]

And then you're going to repeat the cycle versus now. I'm like, you know what? I love that I felt so vulnerable. Like what a great feeling to feel. Now I'm just going to wait to where I can feel it with the right person instead of just shutting yourself off.

[Torin Wells]

But people perspective is so good yeah.

[Host]

People have just such. I know. I had such a hard time not being bitter and angry and. Because it's. It's a lot easier said than done.

[Torin Wells]

Yeah. Well, it's because it's hitting your triggers. That's probably not even about that particular person that broke your heart or disrupted what you thought was happening. There's probably a sequence of events that preceded that moment.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Torin Wells]

That causes that moment to be the thing that's not actually the thing that's just the last. That's the culmination of all of the conflict that you never resolved.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Torin Wells]

And the grace in it is, at some point, you become aware of it.

[Host]

Yes.

[Torin Wells]

I'm aware that I am not even my own person. I'm being controlled by my past. And when you're aware of it, you can actually deal with it and become free. And like you said, you can actually find joy and be comforted in something that is heartbreaking.

[Host]

Yes.

[Torin Wells]

And you don't have to feel guilty for feeling sad about it, because sadness, you know, in Christianity, we create, like, good emotions and negative emotions. It's like sad as a negative emotion. No, sad is an emotion that God hardwired into your being, which is a part of his character. He has been grieved. I mean, Jesus. It's short, as my son loves saying, shortest verse in the Bible. Jesus wept. He grieved so that we could grieve, so that we would normalize grief, normalize sadness. Because sadness only points us to something we valued. I valued that season. I valued that job. I valued those people. And my tears are proof that that mattered. And like you said, it gives you the perspective of God. Thank you for giving me a life where things matter.

[Host]

Yes. Yes.

[Torin Wells]

Because you're living if it matters. But then you also get God to meet you in that. Because I love what one man said. Like, every emotion is a doorway into experiencing the character of God. So sadness is an invitation into gladness. On the other side of recognizing the value of what you lost, you find hope that there's more for you. And so you. You get to experience joy even in mourning, which feels like a tension, but it's not.

[Host]

Wow. That is amazing. So who would you say, is there anyone in particular in your life that has been your biggest influence?

[Torin Wells]

So many different ones in different seasons.

[Host]

Okay.

[Torin Wells]

You know, I think about my parents. Obviously, the older I get, the more I just feel like I'm like my dad, you know? So that influence. I had an amazing youth pastor growing up, who I'm friends with to this day. Amazing. And impactful. God has used different people through different seasons. I would say the most impactful by the end of my life will be my wife. I just. I would not be the person I am today, the place I am today, the whole person I am today without God using her in my life. So I think when it's all said.

[Host]

And done, your partner is the most important person.

[Torin Wells]

Absolutely.

[Host]

In your life, in my opinion. Like, that person can either make you or they can really break you.

[Torin Wells]

100%. Yes. Which is why you want to be very patient.

[Host]

Oh, yeah. I'm gonna pray to God and ask for that patience, because Lord knows that is not my strong. My strongest.

[Torin Wells]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, me neither.

[Host]

Yeah, no, me neither. All right, so I've got a hard question.

[Torin Wells]

Okay.

[Host]

What would you say to people that are listening that didn't have that good youth pastor, that good leader, that person who has been hurt so deeply by the church that may feel a tug to go back, but they have all the nastiness surrounding it? Because we know, we've seen, especially in the past few years, whether it's all these mega churches or like, the church has a way of really harming individuals.

[Torin Wells]

Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. I think, first of all, you gotta say the quiet part out loud and acknowledge that anything built by people breaks and breaks people. And to try to. The. The tension is the church is supposed to hold the moral standard for the culture. And so when you find out that the leaders of that are themselves not living up to that moral standard, it makes it very, very difficult. But the truth is, there will be no perfect institutions. There will be no perfect churches, because, unfortunately, the church is full of people like you.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Torin Wells]

Not you specifically. No.

[Host]

But it's broken. People coming together.

[Torin Wells]

Yes. So if God constructs his church out of broken, in pieces, we should expect to be cut, wounded, hurt in different times. And to recognize that's a person or a group of people that. That does not represent the church universally. That's like saying, I had a bad hamburger at McDonald's, so I stopped eating. It's like, no, I expect for the hamburger to be bad at McDonald's, no offense. And that's not going to stop me from eating.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Torin Wells]

Like I have to eat. You have to have community. You have to be connected to people. And one bad experience, you cannot allow that, no matter how bad and tragic. I mean, there have been atrocious things done by people in the name of Jesus. That's not Jesus. And I think some people were not ever introduced to Jesus. They were introduced to religion. They were introduced to rules. They were introduced to abuse, abuse of authority, abuse of power. They haven't met Jesus.

[Host]

And I would just say in their minds, they have.

[Torin Wells]

But they haven't. No, they haven't. And there. But there are good people. There are good churches. There are good representatives. And the beautiful thing. My wife pointed this out a while ago now, but when the prodigal son came back, the father did not wait for him to get back to the house to meet him. He met him on the way back. And I think some of us think to get back, I got to go the whole distance back to the church. I got to go all the way back to Sunday. And I think ultimately you do get back to the house. There's a party for you at the house. The house is glad that you're there. But God is so good. He doesn't wait for you to clean your life up on your way back so that you're worthy of coming into the house. The father meets you in your brokenness, on your way. He puts a robe over your shoulders, a ring on your finger, and says, my son has come home before you ever get to the house.

[Host]

That's amazing.

[Torin Wells]

So he. His. His love pursues you. He. He is crazy about you. He is. Is relentlessly in pursuit of you so that. Not so that he can win your affection, but so that you can receive his affection.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Torin Wells]

And when you receive that affection, that affirmation that maybe the world never gave you, people never gave you, the church never gave you, it will transform you. And when you get to the house, when you get to the church, you'll be able to come in whole and healthy and able to believe again and. And make room for people's faults. Knowing I'm probably gonna let people down, people are probably gonna let me down, but God's never gonna let us down, and we're just gonna be imperfect together.

[Host]

And I think, too, with everything that you're saying, it's literally just like your song, like, joy in the Morning. Like, there's going to be joy in the morning, like, throughout everything that you go through.

[Torin Wells]

Yes.

[Host]

That song has been one. I, like, forever, has been on repeat. Like, one of my favorite songs.

[Torin Wells]

That's amazing.

[Host]

Like, so good.

[Torin Wells]

Thank you so much.

[Host]

I truly could sit and talk to you for, like, ever. I really could. I may just, like, make special trips out to Austin.

[Torin Wells]

Come on. Come to your church.

[Host]

Come on. Well, all right. So Joy Bomb, when is it officially released?

[Torin Wells]

May 20th. Is the.

[Host]

May 20th. Okay. So people can go and pre order.

[Torin Wells]

Though that, yes, they can.

[Host]

That would be go pre order. Pre orders are huge, huge, huge. So go pre order, order joy bomb. And thank you so much.

[Torin Wells]

Thank you.

[Host]

You truly are such a gift. So thank you.

[Torin Wells]

Thank you. So are you. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to be here. Next time I wear fuchsia.

[Host]

Next time.

[Torin Wells]

Yeah, I'll be locked in.

[Host]

All right, good.

[Torin Wells]

None of these dull colors.

[Tucker]

Clocking out of the Content Factory. I'm Tucker.

[Becca]

And I'm Becca. And this is a podcast where we take a break from climbing the absolute corporate ladder that is being a TikToker.

[Tucker]

That's right. This is the most corporate podcast for the least corporate girlies in this pod.

[Becca]

We're in the break room with you guys, our gorgeous, gorgeous co workers, and.

[Tucker]

You may be wondering what goes on in the content factory.

[Becca]

Give us the agenda, Tucker.

[Tucker]

Well, each episode starts with a performance.

[Becca]

Review where we talk about what's going on in the week. Content. We're making DMs.

[Tucker]

We're getting a little peek behind the curtain of the content creator life. We. We also will be doing an HR.

[Becca]

Report where we ask you guys during the week, what is some workplace drama you got going on?

[Tucker]

And we'll end each episode with a rapid fire and hire things we want.

[Becca]

To get rid of and things we want to keep.

[Tucker]

For example, Becca, what do you want to fire this week?

[Becca]

My ibs.

[Tucker]

Absolutely.

[Host]

Okay.

[Tucker]

And before we go, we have some action items for you.

[Becca]

Please complete by end of day follow rate and review the Content Factory wherever you get your podcasts.

[Tucker]

And as always, we'll circle back soon.

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[Torin Wells]

Very cool.

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[Torin Wells]

You can't outrun this.

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