Episode 15: Stop Faking It: Unlock Authentic Confidence ft. Amanda Booz

Podcast Information:

• Title: UNRULY WITH SHELAH MARIE
• Host: Shelah Marie
• Guest: Amanda Booz
• Release Date: January 14, 2025

Introduction

In Episode 15 of Unruly with Shelah Marie, host Shelah Marie engages in a profound conversation with Amanda Booz, a seasoned journalist, producer, and TV host. The episode delves deep into the intricacies of authentic confidence, exploring personal growth, resilience, and the journey to self-acceptance. Shelah introduces Amanda as “a masterclass in turning self-doubt into self-belief” and sets the stage for a candid discussion on building and maintaining genuine self-confidence.

Icebreaker: Confidence-Boosting Songs

[03:46] Shelah Marie: "What is the song that you turn on that instantly makes you feel confident and powerful?"

[03:56] Amanda Booz: "It's Kanye West's 'Flashing Lights.' I love the beat; it just feels vibrant and empowering."

[04:36] Shelah Marie: "I love 'Let Her Cook' by Glorilla. It's killing it right now in every way."

This segment highlights personal rituals that boost confidence, emphasizing the importance of music in shaping and enhancing one’s mood and self-perception.

Protecting Confidence: Blocking and Setting Boundaries

[05:03] Shelah Marie: "What is the most unruly thing you've ever done to protect your confidence?"

[05:03] Amanda Booz: "Blocking people. Deleting contacts. Ensuring no one can disrupt my calmness or alter my emotions."

Amanda discusses the necessity of setting firm boundaries to maintain self-confidence. She elaborates on removing toxic influences, whether ex-partners, friends, or colleagues, to preserve emotional well-being.

[06:10] Shelah Marie: "People having access to you that either don't mean well for you or make you doubt yourself is maybe one of the less talked about ways in which we undermine our own self-confidence."

This conversation underscores the less visible aspects of self-care, such as digital boundaries and selective social interactions, crucial for sustaining authentic confidence.

Confidence in the Media Industry

[07:36] Amanda Booz: "Working in media requires confidence because you’re so visible—on screen, your thoughts, ideas, and your physical presence."

Amanda reflects on the demands of the media industry, where visibility amplifies the need for self-assurance. She shares her journey of building confidence by recognizing that everyone has their unique light and voice.

[11:00] Amanda Booz: "Seeing and believing that you can achieve these things. I was like, okay, I can manifest this and it can actually happen."

Her insights highlight the power of self-belief and visualization in navigating highly visible and competitive environments.

Dealing with Rejection

[20:47] Shelah Marie: "How do you keep your confidence in moments where it feels like you might face rejection?"

[20:47] Amanda Booz: "Understanding that sometimes a 'no' is just a delayed 'yes,' or that the opportunity might not be right for you right now."

Amanda shares her approach to handling rejection by viewing it as a part of the journey rather than a definitive setback. She emphasizes resilience and the importance of recognizing the right timing for opportunities.

[24:15] Amanda Booz: "Finding ways to navigate a 'no,' like going for a walk or journaling, helps me move forward without dwelling excessively."

This segment provides practical strategies for maintaining confidence amidst professional setbacks, advocating for proactive coping mechanisms.

Coping with Negative Opinions in the Digital Age

[25:47] Shelah Marie: "How do we maintain our confidence in such a noisy space, especially with the barrage of opinions on social media?"

[25:47] Amanda Booz: "First and foremost, realize that these people cannot move you. They don’t know who you are or what you’re going through."

Amanda discusses the impact of social media on self-esteem and offers advice on how to detach from negative feedback. She advises limiting exposure to harmful comments and focusing on constructive interactions.

[27:24] Shelah Marie: "Brene Brown said we care about certain people's opinions, not everyone’s. We don’t have to invest in the cheap seats."

Shelah echoes Amanda’s sentiments by referencing Brene Brown, reinforcing the idea of selective engagement with external opinions to protect one's self-confidence.

Regaining Confidence After Losing Self

[31:34] Shelah Marie: "Have you ever lost a bit of yourself? What would you say to a woman who feels like she just lost a little bit of herself and wants to call that part back?"

[32:58] Amanda Booz: "I've lost myself in relationships before. Therapy was pivotal in helping me rediscover who I am."

Amanda shares her personal experiences of losing and regaining confidence through therapy and reconnecting with passions. She emphasizes the importance of professional help and self-care practices in the healing process.

[35:15] Amanda Booz: "Do the work you love—journal, pray, meditate. These practices help rebuild your confidence."

This discussion highlights the multifaceted approach to healing and self-reclamation, advocating for both professional support and personal wellness routines.

Advice to Younger Self

[40:25] Shelah Marie: "If you could go back to your 15-year-old self and give her one piece of advice about building confidence, what would it be?"

[40:43] Amanda Booz: "Don’t internalize what people say about you. Live out loud, seize every moment, and consistently do the work—journal, pray, meditate."

Amanda offers heartfelt advice to her younger self, focusing on resilience, self-awareness, and proactive personal development. She encourages embracing authenticity and supporting other women as foundations for building confidence.

Practical Toolkit for Confidence

[42:47] Shelah Marie: "Is there a routine or ritual or one piece of advice that you can give our listeners?"

[42:47] Amanda Booz: "Personal fitness, health, and wellness have been incredible for me. Whether it’s working out, walking, Pilates, or simply getting outside, taking care of your body fuels your confidence."

Amanda emphasizes the role of physical health in sustaining mental and emotional well-being. She shares practical tips such as setting up workout clothes in advance to reduce barriers to exercise and maintain consistency.

[44:21] Amanda Booz: "Sometimes just getting to the gym is the big step. It doesn’t have to be perfect, just showing up."

This actionable advice encourages listeners to adopt small, manageable steps towards maintaining their confidence through physical activity and wellness practices.

Conclusion

The episode wraps up with mutual appreciation between Shelah and Amanda, highlighting the transformative power of vulnerability and authentic self-expression. Shelah encourages listeners to subscribe, share the episode, and engage with the podcast through questions via speakpipe.com/unruly. Amanda promotes her podcast, ElevateHer, and their upcoming live event in Miami on January 22, 2025.

Key Takeaways:

• Authentic Confidence: Building confidence is a non-linear journey, marked by waves of self-assurance and moments of doubt.
• Setting Boundaries: Protecting one's confidence may involve cutting ties with negative influences and creating a supportive environment.
• Resilience to Rejection: Viewing rejection as a stepping stone rather than a setback fosters ongoing personal and professional growth.
• Digital Detox: Limiting exposure to negative feedback on social media is crucial for maintaining self-esteem.
• Healing and Self-Reclamation: Professional support, such as therapy, combined with personal wellness routines, aids in regaining lost confidence.
• Practical Self-Care: Incorporating fitness and wellness into daily routines serves as a foundation for sustained confidence.

Notable Quotes:

• Amanda Booz [05:03]: "Blocking people... is definitely one of the things that I've done to protect my confidence."
• Amanda Booz [15:50]: "Confidence is not something you feel every day. It's not linear in any shape or form."
• Amanda Booz [25:47]: "These people cannot move me... they don't know anything about who you are."
• Amanda Booz [40:43]: "Don’t internalize what people say about you. Live out loud, seize every moment."

Connect with Amanda Booz:

• Social Media: @AmandaBooz
• Podcast: ElevateHer

Upcoming Event:

• Date: January 22, 2025
• Location: Books and Books, Coral Gables, Miami
• Tickets: Available on Shelah Marie’s social channels and Eventbrite

Stay Connected:

• Submit Questions: speakpipe.com/unruly
• Subscribe: Follow Unruly with Shelah Marie on your favorite podcast platform to never miss an episode.

Final Words: "Confidence is built brick by brick, one step at a time. Stay unruly, keep being bold, and live in your truth." – Shelah Marie