UNRULY WITH SHELAH MARIE: Episode 4 - "Solo Episode: My Journey As a First Time Author"
Release Date: October 29, 2024
Introduction
In this special solo episode of UNRULY WITH SHELAH MARIE, host Shelah Marie delves deep into her personal journey as a first-time author. This episode serves as a heartfelt exploration of her motivations, challenges, and the transformative process behind writing her book, Unruly. Listeners are treated to an intimate narrative that not only chronicles her path to authorship but also reinforces the core themes of self-love, acceptance, and holistic wellness that define the podcast.
The Birth of Unruly [00:00 - 05:30]
Shelah begins by sharing the exhilarating moment when her book, Unruly, was finally published. Recorded on October 21st, just before the release on October 22nd, Shelah expresses immense gratitude towards her listeners and community for their unwavering support, highlighting the podcast's achievements such as ranking #1 in trailer premieres and securing top spots in various Apple Podcast categories.
Notable Quote:
“This podcast is an extension of my book. A space where we unpack all the ways we can live an unruly life, be unapologetic, be bold, and fully be present in our truth.”
— Shelah Marie [02:15]
Inspiration Behind the Book [05:31 - 15:00]
Shelah delves into the personal experiences that fueled the creation of Unruly. She recounts a pivotal moment from a toxic relationship in Brooklyn, where being publicly humiliated by her ex-partner triggered a profound self-realization. This incident mirrored her childhood trauma of being called a derogatory name, igniting a commitment to transform her narrative.
Notable Quote:
“It really just pushed me to begin my healing journey. I am performing the same dynamic that I accepted from when I was a child now.”
— Shelah Marie [07:45]
Core Themes and Concepts [15:01 - 30:00]
**1. Authentic Living and Self-Transformation
Shelah emphasizes the importance of living authentically, free from societal scripts and outdated beliefs. Writing Unruly was her way of shedding past constraints and fostering a space for black women to thrive unapologetically.
**2. Serious Daydreaming
One of her favorite chapters, "Serious Daydreaming," introduces a method inspired by the concept of quantum jumping. This technique involves envisioning different versions of oneself across infinite possibilities to gain insights and direction.
Notable Quote:
“Serious daydreaming is a method where in a meditation, you tap into a version of yourself who I call your sister self, and she can help you figure out how to navigate this current third dimensional reality.”
— Shelah Marie [20:15]
**3. Casting for Companionship
This challenging chapter explores the dynamics of forming meaningful relationships that go beyond superficial connections. She shares her personal mistakes and the invaluable lessons learned about creating boundaries that foster deep, supportive bonds.
Notable Quote:
“Relationships are a reflection of how you see yourself. You’re becoming better friends with yourself and choosing companions who support your growth.”
— Shelah Marie [25:30]
**4. Main Character Energy
Shelah advocates for taking ownership of one’s narrative, encouraging women to embody the "main character energy." This concept is about stepping into the spotlight of one's own story rather than playing supporting roles in others' lives.
**5. Keeping Your Seams Visible
Inspired by her time at Tisch, this metaphor encourages embracing and showcasing one’s imperfections and experiences as integral parts of their identity. She rejects the notion of hiding flaws, promoting authenticity and vulnerability.
Notable Quote:
“Keep your seams visible. Show all that stitching. Reject the urge to flatten yourself. Your goal is to be honest.”
— Shelah Marie [28:45]
Lessons from Unruly [30:01 - 45:00]
Shelah shares key lessons extracted from her book, aimed at empowering women to embrace their true selves and navigate life's complexities with resilience and grace.
Lesson 1: The World is Your Stage Drawing from her background in acting, Shelah likens life to a theatrical performance where individuals can choose how to present themselves authentically in various situations.
Notable Quote:
“The world is your stage. It’s your opportunity to decide who you want to be and when.”
— Shelah Marie [32:10]
Lesson 2: Main Character Energy Reiterating the importance of being the protagonist in one's own life, Shelah encourages listeners to stop conforming to others' expectations and to own their personal narratives.
Lesson 3: Self Love in Action Shelah redefines self-love as radical self-acceptance. She emphasizes accepting all facets of oneself, including the imperfections, as a form of true self-love.
Notable Quote:
“The most direct way to understand self love is acceptance. Radical self-accepting acceptance, refusing to reject any part of who you are.”
— Shelah Marie [35:50]
Lesson 4: Casting for Companionship Building on her earlier discussion, this lesson focuses on creating and maintaining relationships that support personal growth and journey.
Lesson 5: Keep Your Seams Visible Embracing one's past and imperfections as visible parts of their identity fosters genuine connections and personal authenticity.
Personal Reflections and Future Aspirations [45:01 - 55:00]
Looking ahead, Shelah shares her aspirations for listeners to enter 2025 as their best selves, equipped with the lessons from Unruly. She reflects on the non-linear nature of healing and personal growth, encouraging continuous self-acceptance and transformation.
Notable Quote:
“Healing is not linear. It's messy, it's layered, it's chaotic. But it's always moving.”
— Shelah Marie [50:30]
Conclusion
Shelah wraps up the episode by reiterating her gratitude to her community and encouraging listeners to engage with the book Unruly. She highlights the transformative power of embracing one's true self and building supportive, meaningful relationships. The episode serves as both an introduction to her book and a motivational guide for women seeking to lead authentic, empowered lives.
Key Takeaways
- Embrace Authenticity: Live true to yourself, free from societal expectations and outdated beliefs.
- Utilize Imagination: Techniques like serious daydreaming can help navigate personal challenges.
- Form Meaningful Relationships: Prioritize quality over quantity in friendships, fostering bonds that support personal growth.
- Own Your Story: Embody your narrative with main character energy, taking charge of your life's direction.
- Show Your Imperfections: Keep your seams visible by embracing and sharing your true self, flaws and all.
Recommended for Listeners Who Enjoy:
- Personal Growth Podcasts that delve into self-love and acceptance.
- Candid Conversations with Influential Women navigating their own paths to healing.
- Inspirational Stories about overcoming adversity and embracing one's true identity.
Join the Unruly Community:
Shelah invites listeners to share their stories and connect through social media, fostering a supportive network of women committed to living authentically and unapologetically.
Stay Connected:
- Follow or subscribe to Unruly on your favorite podcast platform to never miss an episode.
- Visit shelahmarie.com for more insights and resources.
Thank you for tuning into this special episode of Unruly. Embrace your journey, stay unapologetic, and continue to live your most authentic life.