
Loading summary
A
This episode is brought to you by NBA on Prime. This Tuesday at 8:30 Eastern, it's the Emirates NBA cup championship game on Prime.
B
This year's quest for the cup has.
A
Been building to this, the championship game.
B
Live from Las Vegas.
A
Not a Prime member sign up for.
B
A 30 day free trial to get started today.
C
The Emirates NBA cup championship game this.
A
Tuesday at 8:30 Eastern, only on Prime. Restrictions apply. See Amazon.com amazonprime for details.
B
And that's a big thing in Australia. You have to have a reason. Why do you want a gun? I like guns.
A
I hate my neighbour.
C
I feel like as a comedian it's okay to punch down.
B
Yeah, yeah. Not white people, but yeah.
D
Why is he flaccid and hard?
B
We meet this guy who's got a haunted doll and it kept beating his wife.
C
Oh, yeah, that's what was doing it.
A
The ghost only visits when dinner's burnt.
D
Say hi to Eli. He's racially ambiguous.
B
Brandon.
D
His hair is fucking fabul nut. A dog joke disposition.
B
And there's a fat electrician.
A
Welcome to Unsubscribe.
D
Bully. F just taking splash damage all day long. F did nothing. You just walked and he started attacking you. In his defense, he did attack everyone.
B
It's a great way to command a room though, is.
D
Oh, you got to pop.
A
You assert dominance.
B
How will I? I was sitting here for 45 minutes. You pricks are all late. 1, 2, 1, 2, 3, 3, 2. Why are you going backwards?
D
Why are you counting?
B
You see what I'm doing? I'm a seasoned counter.
A
He's taking over the podcast.
B
What the fuck? Welcome to the Unsubbed podcast. My name's Isaac Butterfield and it's a fantastic honor to be here.
C
He also counted.
B
I'm looking at the wrong camera too.
C
I don't know if you noticed, he counted backwards from you because of where he's from the other side of the door.
B
Oh, yeah, it's not the toilets. They spin in different directions.
A
Exactly.
D
I forgot about that. I forgot about that.
C
Hi, everyone. Welcome to the Unsubscribe podcast. I'm joined today by Eli Double Tap, Isaac Butterfield, Brandon Herrera and myself, donut operator. Thank you so much for being here.
B
What's up, bitches?
D
It's good to see you all. We haven't had our boy on in fucking like two years.
B
Yeah, two years. I'm back.
A
You've been on the podcast, mate.
B
I've been everywhere. I've. I've been. Yes, it answered your question.
A
That was before the podcast got better.
D
The Switcheroony.
B
I know big movements, people have died, and it's all happened since I've been here last. It's good to be here, though. I thoroughly enjoyed my time in Texas. It's great. I love Texas. It's the only state I like. Everywhere else I've been, it's. Although there is a lot of homeless.
D
People here in Austin.
B
Well, yes. I was only in Austin for a couple of hours yesterday, and my drive to San Antonio yesterday as well, there was less than last time I was here pre Trump. There was a lot more. I will say that. Not that I'm a Trump fan. I am a Trump fan. You're not allowed to say that in Australia. You get.
A
You go back to the COVID camp, literally.
B
Like, I like Trump because he's hilarious. Okay? I think we can all agree that he's hilarious. I don't have any opinions on policies or who he puts in, you know, in his government. I don't know enough about it. I don't know enough about that type of stuff. But what I know is he's a funny. And where I come from, that's more important than anything else.
C
Dude, that's how I vote, man. As long as the memes are funny.
B
Exactly.
C
Yeah.
A
Like, that's one thing. I'm like, dude, I don't care if you like the man, if you like his policies.
D
You.
A
You got to admit to all these people that are like, you know, oh, I don't. I don't do politics. I don't get involved. You know, his presidency is going to be so much funnier. Like, 2016 to 2020 was meme goal.
B
Absolutely.
A
Loved it.
B
Absolutely.
D
And history books.
B
We were. I was talking to someone in his. In his camp, and it's too early to name drop on the podcast, so I won't. But we were talking about how the media attention, particularly in Australia, like, I was sending him these photos and videos of the news, and the news cycle was just hammering on everything. And, like, I was watching it live more live on, like, X and that type of stuff. Twitter, what was actually happening in the moment and the difference between what was shown by, you know, journalists on the ground or from the horse's mouth, so to speak, in comparison to what you saw on the 6 o' clock news was vastly different. So, you know, my mum, my auntie, my grandma, all these people, they're all getting a completely different narrative. And it must be the same here. Everyone's aunties, grandmas, these type of people, the older people, the people who aren't you know, invested in social media.
A
The people that watch the View, well, this is.
B
But that's their target, mark.
A
Yeah, no, 100%. It's unintentionally.
B
It's that and illegals.
D
Yeah, well.
B
Yeah, right.
D
I was. That's actually one of the questions is like, from your position over in Australia, how does it look seeing America's. I guarantee it's just painted as chaos. Like we look like a third world country sometimes.
B
Yeah, I mean, well, I was in LA for 12 hours. That was close enough.
A
That is a third world country.
B
I've been to LA like five times in my life and it is a shithole. Like it is just all I could. Just smells like it's. It's not as vibrant as where I'm from. Like just the colour in the sky. So where I live, it's like a smallish town, like a big town, but it's be small to you guys, but it's a, it's a bigish town for Australia and we're like 20, 30 minutes from the. The main hub and even where we are, we're around some farms and stuff and it's nice and, you know, quiet. And it's not yellow. Yeah, it's not, it's yellow.
D
Everything's like chips colored filter.
B
It is. So I'm glad that's not just me because every time I get there, I was saying to my wife Claire the other day, we're at home and I was hanging the washing out like any good husband should. And I was, I was saying, I'm just, you know, I'm not looking forward to that part of America where it's just like you're wearing these. What's that sepia toned glasses like. It's. When you go its own, it's very, very strange. But in answer to your question, people look down on America because they haven't been here and they don't know Americans or they don't know the right Americans. And I think that's the difference. I've been lucky enough to meet a lot of really good Americans and some shit ones, no doubt, some very mentally ill ones. I'm in the comedy world. We're right here, part and parcel. It's good to see you.
A
It's catching strays over here, but yeah.
B
I don't know, anywhere you go in the world, everyone's exactly the same. They sound a little bit differently. The biggest one, and we were talking about this earlier, was the opinion that Australians, and probably the Brits as well, people from the UK and British, you know, Britain have on guns. And I'm someone who. I was trying to get a gun license in Australia, not for any particular reason. And that's a big thing in Australia. You have to have a reason. Why do you want a gun? Well, I like. I like guns. They're fun to shoot. And when I go on, I trade.
A
My neighbour.
B
Think they like me, baby. You know what I mean? Like, I like that shit.
D
Good reason.
B
But you have to for anything in Australia. The reason is why. Like, I don't know what your rules are with local governments and councils and whatnot, but even to take a tree down to put a pool in, it's like thousands of dollars and like begging and you got to get all these people to agree on it. It's crazy.
A
Even with.
D
On your own property.
B
Don't drop a tree down, mate.
A
Nico would hate it there.
B
It's fucking awful. It's ridiculous. Like, I had to remove this giant gum tree.
D
Huge.
B
It was like 30. It's beautiful tree. But it was so close to my house. And my son's bedroom's like just there. And the tree's right. I'm like, fuck, man, I can't. Like, it gets windy. I start freaking out. So we got it down and then put a pool in. Cause we're loaded and a bunch of mad dogs, my man. And the amount of like jumping through hoops and all that shit, it was just absolutely crazy. But you have to beg to do things in Australia, like, you know, liquor licensing. You can't open a bar. I was saying this to Ben, my opener, who's off camera at the moment. Ben McLennan, hot bloke about. In Newcastle, where I'm from, they were trying to open a gentleman's club. And, you know, bottom level was just normal service at a bar. Next level up was like lingerie. And then it was like a strip club. And there were so many people that complained, you know, this isn't right for Newcastle. They squashed the whole idea. Like, where is that freedom? And that's what a lot of Australians sort of. They feel like they're free, but they're really not. They don't have the ability to do what you guys can do here. And I think they're somewhat jealous of that. And this is just me, you know, answering that question in a long rounded way and saying that I would like a gun.
A
We might know some people.
C
So, like, I just asked you what.
D
Your favorite meat was.
C
You apply. You apply for the firearms licensing. What firearms can you get? Is there a Set amount you can get.
B
Okay. So caliber to be in Australia, everything's like sort of. There's no automatic weapons. None. They're all. I guess when you. This is how much I know about guns. When you have to like fucking do these ones.
A
So bolt action.
B
Bolt action, yeah. So they're all. I don't even think you get leather actions. Leather, not leather. Just trying to speak the. Yeah. Has to be bolt action. I've shot like on a mate's farm. I shot like a 50 cal. That was really cool. But that's the biggest gun that I was able to get. He was able to get that because he's got a giant property and it's for shooting. He said it was for D. Which do you want to send the deer into the. The ends of the earth. But it'll do it. Yeah, that'll do it.
A
Get the job done.
B
We were shooting his ex partner's car and it was like you know, a couple of a mile away or whatever it was.
A
But he owned the car.
B
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. He bought it for her. Put it up there because they broke up or someone cheated. Who cares. And anyway we were shooting it and the. The crazy thing about a 50 cal. This giant round that's worth you know, what, 10, 15, $20 each. I don't know what it is.
A
You're above five.
B
Yeah. Oh, everything mate. I drive a ram, right. That's what I drive in Australia. They're like $170,000 to buy. Jesus Christ.
D
Dude. That's what's.
A
Yes.
B
It's crazy.
D
The trucks there are insanely.
B
I looked it up. It's like 60, $70,000 here for like a brand if you buy from a dodgy dealer. But nonetheless, I couldn't believe it. I was blown away. Anyway, sorry rams on me mind. My father in law drove us to the airport and then took it back into my. And scrape the shit out of the side of it. Oh fuck. I was so upset.
A
Do you wait for you to leave the country before he told you?
B
No, no. We found out there but.
C
So you drive a full size truck. Like there's not many full size trucks over there. Like.
A
Like a Dodge Ram.
B
There's a lot more Rams and F150s. F150s. You used to be able to get them but you'd have to import them yourself. Now they are being sold there rams. Like there's none of this like you know, four tires at the back business. Like that doesn't happen in Australia. The roads don't fit them. People look at you like you're a piece of. People look at me like that. Anyway, so I'm like, whatever, all good. But they. They don't know how to deal with it. They don't fit in car spaces. I mean, you know, they're still big trucks, so maybe they don't do that here either. I scraped the out of mine going into a car park when I first got it because it's just not made for it. But yeah, they're starting to get everywhere, which is really, really cool. But on. On the firearm thing, you have to prove that you are. To get a handgun, you have to get. You have to like, go to a handgun, like, club like once every, like three, three months or something. Like, you have to show your face and like, get marked off the roll. Like, yeah, I'm here. You have to be a part of the club. You have to store your weapon at the club. You have to shoot a certain amount of times a year. And for the rifle, you have to be either at a rifle club or have a farm sort of thing, but they have to be locked up. You can get random checks, all that type of stuff.
A
And a lot of stuff like that in Europe. And I think that's where like, some of that comes down to is like the. It's just like the difference in idea in the role of government. Whereas here in the. In the United States, like, it's a lot more like dangerous freedom, like the individual over a collective, like in the way it should be. Anyway, I'm not saying we're 100% like this anymore. You know, things deteriorated over time. But originally the idea was the government should be asking its people, people if the government is allowed to do something. Whereas in Europe or in Australia or a lot of these countries, like, the collectivist idea is like, I'm doing a thing. I should have to ask my government first. I want to put a pool in my backyard. I have to ask the government. I want to own a firearm even though I live on a ranch and there's coyotes that just ate my Labrador. Like, oh, I need to ask the government. It's just like that. Very different ideas on governance.
B
Well, with the weapons. It's. Ever since there was this shooting, a mass shooting in. In. Where was that? Port Arthur in Tasmania.
A
It was like the late 90s. Yeah.
D
Or 90. Yeah, I think it's mid 2000s.
B
It was right before an election. Didn't have anything to do with it. And that was the one where it.
C
Was like a kids camp and dude went in.
B
So Port Arthur Itself is an old convict settlement where we went there last year.
A
Much like the whole continent.
B
Like. Like the entire continent. And you go in there and there's all these old buildings and stuff, and it's like a historical place. So people were just there to go to the cafe and walk around and see the sights and all that type of stuff. And it's a cool little joint, look back at the 1800s, whatever. But, yeah, so old mate walks in and I don't. You're not allowed to question any of this story in Australia. Even me saying this now or what? Or it's. You're in trouble, mate.
A
Like actual legal.
B
No, not in legal trouble. Which is okay. You just get. If you ever look at a conspiracy or even just question it, I always like to question absolutely everything. You know what I mean? Like, I think that's a very. It's very good to have a healthy level of distrust with the official story. And even when you say words like official story, you sound like a crazy person. But I say it all the time, so I'm very used to it. But the people. So politicians who have questioned any of the official story have been shut down. They've been, you know, the media goes hard on them. Almost like they all get a memo, like, go after this person, whatever. But the official story is this guy, real autistic, strange dude. Which seems to be the flow of things when it comes to mass shootings. But this was a long time ago.
D
He.
B
He went out and he. I don't know the exact numbers, but maybe someone in the comments can go through and, you know, have a look at this. But the headshot count was so high that it was that people were just like, what? Like, he's just this random guy and he's hit all of these people. I think it was like 30 something deaths, something like that.
A
So it was April 1996. Killed 35 people, right. And wounded 23.
B
So, yeah, he just unleashed. And I don't know what type of weapon he had. What's this? Green?
D
Eli, if I could read, I would be able to tell you AG1. I took that class in high school.
A
Yeah, I'm sorry I didn't take corn three.
D
Boom. We're talking about AG1. Or as Nick says, AG1.
A
Is it a multivitamin that combines your.
D
Pre and probiotics, superfoods and antioxidants into one simple scoop. Not amateur biotics. Probiotics.
C
Them kids are dirty, dude. The kids are running around with their little counterparts. They're touching hands with each other. They're getting dirty. So it's better to boost your immune system with AG1.
D
AG1. Ah, yummy. You drank all that? Yeah. All right.
A
Heading into the holidays, it can be hard to maintain a balanced diet and give your body the nutrients it needs, which is why A1 comes in AG1. Tomato, tomato.
C
Them kids is dirty.
D
AG1 is one of the easiest daily health habits you can start. What a great New Year's resolution, Eli. Brandon, what are yours other than taking AG1?
A
Well, if you take out AG1, that's my all of my New Year's resolutions. That's all I want to do is I want to drink more of it.
D
They come in little packs or travel packs. Show them the travel pack, hot dog style pack as opposed to the hamburger style pack. And we use this for the live shows because when we are on the road or touring, hot dog or hamburger is very nice to carry around. Also, AG1 comes in multiple flavors. We have original grass, citrus berry and tropical.
A
And right now, AG1 has their best offer ever. If you head on over to drink ag1.com unsubscribe what do you get, Eli?
D
Well, you'll get the welcome kit, a morning person hat, a bottle of vitamin D3 plus K2, an AG1 flavor sampler, and you'll get to try their new sleep product, Agz. We're drinking it at night.
A
That's drinkag1.com unsubscribe for $126 in free.
B
Gifts for new subscribers. Now there's all these stories about people saying, and obviously whenever there's a shooting, there's a million different stories that come out. I haven't researched it enough. I don't know anything about it. This is a joke. But there's all these people talking about they saw all these dudes like in sort of like blacked out military gear and all that type of stuff that day. And then other people are saying, oh, no, he wasn't, was somewhere else. And. And then there's these other people that have been in prison with him and he's like, no, I did it. You know, I did it for this reason, whatever. So there's all these different stories. Oh, so they didn't kill him. He's alive still. Jesus. Oh, yeah.
D
I did not know that.
B
Yeah, I'm sure. Martin Bryant, his name is.
A
That's at least something we're pretty good at.
B
Yeah. Taking him out.
A
Yeah. What is it? Why can't always entered the chat.
D
I'm surprised that he's.
B
Yeah, he's still there. Surely he'd be like. I don't know, what is he now? Like maybe 60 or something like that. I think it says there what, he was 28 at the time. So he's really young. Like a loner, sort of like, you know, the age old story with mashup. Yeah, yeah. Like he's 58. Yeah. And he looked like a. Can you pull up one of the images? No, no, that's him now. Have a look at the him when it. When it happened. He looks like a scary dude.
D
Look at that.
B
Imagine that guy coming at you with a bloody anything at ya.
C
Did he have girl hair?
D
Yeah. Huh.
C
That's wild.
B
Well, I don't believe in gender, so that's. That's unfortunate you'd bring that up.
D
No, I think it's his.
A
It's a frumpy shirt.
D
Yeah, Frumpy shirt. I didn't realize it was that high of a number.
B
It was huge. And then so right at the election, the prime minister coming in, John Howard, or he was running or he was, whatever it was, he was elected in 96. He banned guns. There was a big amnesty. Like everyone's handing guns in and stuff. And so the conspiracy theorists of the world would be like, hey, well, is this a false flag? What is this? Or did it really happen? Or is it. Or maybe it did happen and they're sort of just going, hey, well this is a great chance to, you know, get the guns. Or maybe they're just really nice politicians and they wanted to help people out.
A
Yeah, I can't. I don't want to misappropriate the quote or misattribute the quote. I think it was Rahm Emanuel. Never let a good crisis go to waste. So that's like, hey, that's the opportunity. It was just like in New Zealand with the Christchurch shooting.
B
Yeah.
A
There's an very similar situation.
B
Yeah. And they take those moments and they run with them. Covid was shit. Let's get right into all of that.
A
That is your fucking preach brother. Hey, Ryan Reynolds here for Mint Mobile. You know, one of the perks about having four kids that you know about is actually getting a direct line to the big man up north. And this year he wants you to know the best gift that you can give someone is the gift of Mint Mobile's Unlimited Wireless for 15amonth. Now you don't even need to wrap it. Give it a try@mintmobile.com switch.
B
Upfront payment of $45 per three month plan, equivalent to $15 per month required. New customer offer for first three months only.
A
Speed slow after 35 gigabytes.
B
If network's busy, taxes and fees extra. See mintmobile.com. go for it, man.
D
The.
B
The amount of people who still wear masks in Australia is hilarious. For one, we see there's so many.
A
Like, what percentage would you say?
B
I don't go out, for starters, I don't. But you go to a city and there's people less now, but, like, two or three years after, like, there was still people. Like, normal people. I saw a lady, like, in a car by herself recently with one on. Like, a white lady, too. Wasn't an Asian. Asians have been doing that forever. Like, you know, Chinese, Japanese people, they'd.
D
Do that anytime they were sick. Like, even with a comic book. That was very natural.
B
That makes. If I had some sort of viral flu or something, it makes sense. Wear a mask. Okay. It's a nice thing to do.
A
Or if you got, like, a weakened immune system, you're going through some sort of, you know, chemotherapy or whatever it is. Like, okay, well, that. That tries.
B
Even now, if you've got a vomiting bug or something. Yeah, throw a mask on, bro. It's all good.
C
We do. We have an Aussie friend who. He. He went out to the middle of a. Like, a park. He, like, went out to a baseball field. Like, no one was around for hundreds of meters. And he lays down and he just. He's kind of chilling. He takes a nap, wakes up. This is during COVID and there's Aussie police standing over him, and they're like, you went past your time of being outdoors. Like, you can't be out this long.
B
So looking back at all of that with retrospect, how scary of a situation is that? When you consider that the death rate was very low, infection rate, very high, death rate, very low. Imagine if the death rate was high or they could really bung it on, so to speak, or put it on sort of thing, if you know what bung it on means. My opener, Ben, he was walking this morning through. We're in San Antonio at the moment, and he's walking. This lady stands at the front and stares at him. And he. And Ben goes, g', day. How you going? And she ran inside. And I was like, she didn't hear what you said. You just out there going, yeah, terrifying.
A
Shouted gibberish.
D
You can't.
B
I said, you gotta start talking slower, mate.
D
She was laughing over here. Yeah, she was like, I understand.
B
But, yeah, it's. Covid was crazy. And, yeah, people were being there was A dude arrested. I meant there's a famous vision of this guy being arrested on a beach. We went for or may not arrest it, but let off the beach, which is same thing. All right? Arrested, let off by police. If they're infringing on your freedoms as a human being to move throughout time and space, then that's enough during that time, like, you can't, you can't do that. It's madness. And I was originally with the, with the jab. I made a video saying, this is a great idea. We should all get it right. And then people still hammer me about that. They're like, you were a pro at the start. I was like, I was. I assumed it was all sweet. I assumed it was like all the other ones that I was sweet with beforehand. And now every. Like we've got a two year old, you know, we had to talk to doctors about different things and ask questions about different sort of injections and stuff. And man, they, they just go, nah, no questions. Like, it's. I trust it. I do it to my kids. That's what they said. And I don't know, man, it's. There's a lot. The mistrust that I now have for. And it's not, it's not individual people in the government. It's this collective. It's this absolute power that people have when they're in a group and they don't see the individual person. They see you as a number or whatever. They look at you like you're an underling because they've been, you know, projected into this position and they just make decisions for you because they know better and they don't give a shit.
A
And it's to advance their career. It's not out of any concern for you. I've seen how they run a fucking dmv. I wouldn't trust them with jack shit. I wouldn't trust them to cut my grass.
B
Yeah.
D
Anyone been in the government or worked or did something alongside it? They. I've never met somebody. It's like, yeah, dude, that's so efficient.
A
Especially like great things like military team guys. Oh, dude, you want to see who don't trust the government?
B
Yeah.
A
Ask any of those dudes. Any, like the old school SF boys.
B
My God, the government's played with their life and probably still does in many different ways. You know, they've held them like this, like a puppet, dude.
C
The first time I was ever introduced to Alex Jones was when I was working. The first time I started working around seals back in like 2009. Dude, they. They don't like the government very much.
B
Yeah, I, I get it, I get it. And I, As I've gotten older, you sort of turn into your dad or a father figure perhaps, if you don't have a dad. Like, you turn into those people, you look at how they were when you were a kid and they're all old and bitter and they go, government. And you're young and you're like, oh, come on. Then you get older and you're like, you fucking government. You're right.
D
Shane Gillis has that bit where he's like, eh, it happens. I have early onset Republican.
A
Yeah, Wakey's like, I just, I'll be sitting there watching World War II documentaries to go to sleep. Like, oh shit, this is how it happens.
B
100%. Not to bring Oban and Ben up again. He fell asleep on the plane yesterday watching World War II documentaries. He's two years older than me.
A
It's how it happened.
B
I'm like, what the. Dude, what are you doing?
C
Early onset Republican.
B
I love that shit. And I've become more right wing as I've gotten older. And even Claire, my wife, who very. Not talking shit, but a sheltered upbringing, like, very protective parents and that type of stuff. And now she's just like, fuck. She's anti this. And she's like, nup. She's like, fuck this. She's sharing Trump memes all the time. It's hilarious. Her dad wears a Ma Maga hat to the shops. Make America great again. He lives in fucking Australia. Like, what are you talking about?
C
I just, I remember like I, I grew up as a skateboarder.
B
Like, hated cops.
C
They chased us off of our skate parks and stuff. Like the, like our skate spots.
B
Yeah.
C
And then I became a cop. I was like, oh my God, people are shitty as. Like, some of these laws should be enforced.
B
Yeah. Yeah. Well, you see, you see as a cop, the worst of people. And then you have to deal with some dickhead, you know, skating or they're, you know, grinding a rail, as I always attempted to do when I was a kid. And you use the old wax candle to try. And I just, I was a fat kid, hopeless. But you know, and then you have to deal with that. He's dealing with a. In the morning and some dumb kid in the afternoon. Like, how do you, how do you do that? And how do you do that and not be a prick? Like, that's got to be hard. You've got, you know, and I don't.
A
Know if you want to get into it. But some of those, like, specific cases where you're like, you had to deal with something, like, horrific, and then. And then the very next call is some Karen arguing about trash cans.
B
Yeah, yeah.
C
This. This one drunk dude just, like, ran over this baby and smeared him all over the road. Like, mom was pushing a stroller across the street and he was looking at a cell phone. He looked up, smeared this baby all over the road. Like, took it out of his mother's arms, like, done, kids. Done baby spaghetti. And then like, the next call, I've got some old rich white who's like, my neighbor's trash can is in front of my house. And you just got like, yeah, okay, I'll handle that for you. Thank you for calling.
D
Yeah, that's a hard one. That's a such a switch. That's why I've said it multiple times. I would never want to. Like, a war, your war. You're just there the entire time. Your checkout is. You're still with your guys. You feel protected. Blah, blah, blah. As a police officer, you deal with that and then you go immediately home to your family. So there's.
B
And do you work in the area too, that you.
C
Yeah, dude.
B
Yeah. And then. So where that poor baby was, you drive past that when you're not in uniform as well?
C
Yeah, man, I work that side of town.
B
And so that's. I don't know how. I don't know how you deal with that. Like, obviously that's a. It's a strong willed human being to deal with shit like that and not to suck your D on camera.
C
No, no, it was.
A
That's for Patreon.
B
But I will while seeing Zach Bryan.
C
Well, then. Well, then you got some cops that'll kick you off a fucking beach during COVID Brandon.
D
Yeah.
A
Oh, my God. That was. Covid was just such a. A scary glimpse into exactly how much people will cooperate.
B
That's why everyone was a Nazi in Germany, so to speak. You know what I mean? It's why they existed.
C
Me and Brandon were on this, like, beautiful beach in South Carolina during, like, the height of COVID And we're just like, chilling on the beach.
A
It was during the Summer of Love because it was when Charleston was actively burning, if you recall.
C
Yeah, because someone died of a heroin overdose. But we were just like, chilling out there on the beach and this cop comes by and is like, you can't be here. There's restrictions. Me and Brandon are just like, what the fucking?
A
Like, over a loudspeaker. We were the only Ones on this beach, like, as far as the eyes I can see.
B
The people were scared. They thought everyone was going to die because they saw everyone in China dropping. Do you remember that? Like, people were, like, walking out in body bags full.
D
Oh, yeah.
A
Remember, like that fucking body bag thing.
D
Wild.
A
The Resident Evil looking footage of, like, Chinese dudes with MP5s going into apartment.
C
Buildings, like Umbrella Corporation coming in.
B
Yeah, yeah.
D
They were like. Yeah. There was like plastic tubes in rooms.
B
Spraying from the streets out of trucks. All like hand sanitizer or whatever.
A
That's what we were being shown in the very early days.
B
And now it's here and you want to go to the beach.
D
Yeah.
B
Wrong with you.
A
But this was like in. This is in, like June, I think, right?
B
Yeah.
A
Like, this is like way after everybody's like, oh. And like, don't get me wrong, there was a lot of. There were a lot of deaths, but a lot of those, too. Some of them were natural, but some of them were just because, like, we were putting people on ventilators.
B
Yeah. That was the wrong. That was the wrong thing to do. We.
D
No one knew.
A
It was so sporadic, to my understanding of this. Again, I'm not a doctor. I just talked to a lot of them. But like this, they. They didn't know what internal lung pressure to keep these people on, because what would save somebody would kill another. So a lot of the ventilators or the ventilators were. Were actually what was killing people is the treatment, not necessarily the disease. There's just. There's conventional wisdom, and it just didn't fucking work for this one.
B
Yeah, and people were dying of comorbidities as well. And that was a huge one that was kept up in the. And we're talking about the gun crime statistics beforehand. I just walked in here talking about guns. Give me a gun. But how many of those are. And then. But they're still, you know, put in the same realm of gun deaths, and then that number's spread overseas or into your own communities. And people like those fucking Americans with guns, you know, they're all crazy. I. So I. I work because I've said a lot of horrible things on stage, jokes about things that you shouldn't joke about, all that type of stuff. I have security every show, right. I have my own personal security. These guys, they do the ufc, the Salt and the Brunei and me.
A
Nice.
B
It's a bit ridiculous. Like, obviously, the ufc, hectic security, heaps of fans, Sultan of Brunei, very important heaps of money. And then just me just walking through the shop in a community because I'm there to tell dick jokes. But they're all ex military, ex police, all good people and people I trust. And these are people who, if they were in America, they'd have guns. A lot of them actually spend time here and own guns here in other people's sort of collections or whatever. One of them hooked me up with the Austin police. He's got an uncle, he's like, my uncle said you can do a ride along with him. I was like, okay, cool.
C
Fucking should.
B
Yeah, I would like to do it. I'm a bit like, I couldn't imagine.
A
Doing a ride along in Austin.
D
I know that's all the places I'd be like. If I asked him, I'd be like, is it just.
B
Just 6th street, just homeless people you're dealing with?
C
I was about to say it's fucking homeless people and then drunk people. 6th Street.
D
Guess what it is the fight no one saw coming. I actually didn't see Paul fighting Joshua, period. I'm surprised he took also. Nobody asked for it. That is true.
A
I don't know who the other guy is, frankly.
D
He's. I showed you him knocking people out. He's the one that killed Nuganu.
B
He killed him.
D
Killed him.
B
He's dead.
D
Yep.
C
Jake Paul vs Anthony Joshua live on Netflix December 19th 19th Two worlds collide.
D
In the ring and DraftKings sportsbook has the entire event covered. Bet on every round, every punch and every knockout moment.
A
With live betting and fast payouts, you're always ringside for the action. I was looking at the wrong camera.
D
And I will be betting on Anthony Joshua for a knockout, hopefully in round one or two. I think he knocked out Nagano in round two, right? New customers bet just $5 and if your bet wins, you'll instantly get an extra 200 in bonus bets. When you use code unsub, that's code unsub.
C
Code Unsub.
D
In partnership with DraftKings. The Crown is yours.
C
Gambling problem.
D
Call 1-800-GAMBLER in New York. Call 877-8-HOPE NY or text Hope in Life 467-369 in Connecticut. Help us available for your gambling problem, call 888-78-97-7777 or visit ccpg.org Please play.
B
Responsibly on behalf of a boot hill.
A
Casino resort in Kansas. Has to prepare wager tax money May apply in Illinois 21 +. Age eligibility varies by jurisdiction. Boyden, Ontario restrictions applying that must win.
D
To receive bonus which expire in seven days. Minimum odds required for additional Terms and responsible gaming resources c dkng.com audio limited.
B
Time author well, I. My first impression of 6th street, we're driving to the comedy Mothership. I was going there with some friends and all that type of stuff. And, you know, we were driving in there. I've been in Austin for 10 minutes, whatever, or whatever. And there was just this lady injecting heroin or whatever in the alley.
A
Oh, my God.
B
It's crazy. I was.
D
We. And we went and did our first live show. Nick had never even been to Austin. His first experience. We pull up to our live show, and in the alley, there's people doing drugs.
B
Isn't that crazy?
A
It's worse.
C
And then. So we're doing our live show. It's where Kill Tony used to do the Vulcan.
B
They're playing.
C
And so we.
B
We had like.
C
Like, we had, like, 30 people in line just waiting to get into our live show. And so me and Nick were like, hey, dude, you want to grab a beer? Nick's like, yeah, let's grab a beer and go outside and talk to him. And so me and him, we have. We have our beers and we just walk out onto the street, and we're just, like, kind of talking to people. The cops come by and they're like, you can't drink out here right now. You can't have your beers out here. Me and Nick look over and there's someone shooting up heroin, like, right beside us. And we're just looking at the cop, like, I. Yeah, all right. Yes, officer. All right, yeah, we'll just go back inside and drink.
B
That was the priority was to get you guys out of there. Drinking piss.
D
And so it's like, that lady's fine.
B
Continue what you do, man. That was. And I was like a little schoolboy in the headlights. I was like, oh, she's doing drugs. And I've been around drugs. Like, when I started, I played rugby league growing up, so it's sort of like rugby, but a lot faster, right?
A
Big heroin users, big heroin users, Huge in the heroin.
B
You gotta get your weight down now.
D
Strong out team.
B
Yeah, actually, I used to play football with a guy who used to. He used to make this Gatorade before a game that had speed in it. And he'd put. I don't know how much speed, but he. But. And he always. I remember him making a tackle with his face once, and he didn't react. And I was like, man, this guy's so tough, but he's off his fucking head. But he was tough as nails. Great player. Good dude. But just. Yeah. I'm math and I was just in there.
A
I might have to work for the Germans.
B
Yeah, exactly right. Full blitzkrieg, just straight through the line.
A
That's like the opposite of heroin, though. It's just like. And.
B
Huh. Hut height.
D
The lean. They just stay in position. Yeah. Just walk around that line.
C
You're like, oh, we're fighting zombies again.
D
It's in slow mo. They're just paused.
B
But I was 18 or 17 or 18. It was mad Monday, the day after your last game of the year. Everyone drinks all day. It was called Mad Monday. And one of the boys turned up with a bag of like, 200 ecstasy pills. And he just walks in. And I was like, 17, 18, fresh out of school. And I was just like, oh, Jesus Christ. What the is this? So I was like, pretty used to drugs and that. I was never a big drug guy. Still aren't. Still am not. But kids usually do that.
C
Yeah.
B
Right. So I'm 32 now, and this was back. Back in the day. So I imagine they're all just. They're all off their heads still.
D
But now you get to see somebody doing heroin live on.
B
Yeah. There's something about that needle where you're just like. That's commitment, you know? I was on peptides for a while and I felt like a junkie just doing it, you know? And I wasn't even on the good shit.
D
It's so true. That is like the line for me is the nose or the needle. I'm like, man, that's.
B
Yeah, the nose is like.
D
I'm like, man, that would be terrifying.
B
Yeah. Fucking even that, like.
A
Like piercing your skin.
B
Yeah.
A
Is. Is a.
B
That's.
A
That's a barrier to entry.
D
Yeah.
A
Literally.
B
And it should be. It should be if you have to pierce your skin. Like, even. Like when I first I went on a keto diet back, like five or six years ago, I'm very big fan of the keto diet. I have this weird neurological condition where I lose control of my head and my neck. It's called paroximal dyskinesia. Anyway, PKD for short, if anyone wants to write that down.
D
How do you set that off?
B
So what it is, you may notice sometimes when I'm talking to people, I blink with one eye or wink. I'm not trying to fuck you. Well, I am trying to F you, but I'm not trying to you. Like, not at that moment. I'm not trying to give that. Yeah. And it's basically me sort of like Just centering my eyesight because that's one of my triggers. And anyway, I lose control of my head and my neck. Like, I'm trying to look behind me. Like, my eyes, like, fling around like that, and it goes on for, like, 30 seconds. It's related to epilepsy and migraines. Happens very rarely. But where was I going with this?
D
I was just asked, why drugs?
B
What was your answer?
D
Yeah, drugs. Yeah.
B
And so.
A
Were we, I think. So we're talking about, like, barrier to entry.
B
We'll be right back.
A
Yeah, kind of, like heroin usage and stuff like that.
B
Yeah. No, so I got it from burn on heroin for. I started heroin last time I was in Austin, and it's turns out it's everywhere.
C
Welcome to Unsub, where you have felons and junkies on just here.
B
Like, have you ever thought. Because you often have very famous people or, you know, people with great stories, maybe a junkie or a heroin user, just to ask those sort of questions.
D
Dude, JD Is the same reason you.
A
Don'T do it in football. So what was it like when you first started?
D
JD talks about it all the. Anytime he's been on, he's very open about that. And this guy has 58 felonies.
A
Wow.
B
Yeah.
D
JD has a fucking. A laundry list of everything. And he admits to it. And then he atoned for that. That's one of the big switches. He's like, no, I was even trying to figure out how to get out of my last sentencing. And then my lawyer and friend at the time said, hey, how has that worked in the past? And he's like, oh, I need to take accountability. And then he's like, hey, I've. Yep, I did that.
B
Blah, blah, blah.
D
And then the judge gave him, okay, hey, you can just do house arrest and probation, but if you fuck up again, like, you're gone. Yeah, you're done. Done, done, done, done, done.
A
Dude's been clean for years. Great guy. And, like, talks to other people who are going through shit like that and, like, kind of works with rehabilitation.
B
That's such an important part for people who are in that position right there to see that there is some light at the end of the tunnel. Like, I know a lot of people who are, like, in those positions, and they're like, you know, there's no way out. And just for someone to give you the. The knowledge that there is a way out of this. So even if you do it unconsciously, it's.
D
It's giving that individual hope, because it is. Oh, look how far I've fallen. I can't possibly get out of this situation. And then you have a JD who's like, I have 58 felonies. You have zero.
B
Do you think.
D
I assure you, you can fall way further down.
B
Do you think there's a way? There's a. There's a place where it is impossible to get back out of. Like you said, these people stuck in like a, you know, Kol or with children.
D
That's like, that's, that's.
A
I'm coming back from that. I'm sorry.
B
I more mean like the homeless people you see who are just, you know, out of it.
A
I mean, sure, there's probably a point where you've done so much damage to your brain where, like, you're not able to be a functioning member of society anymore. But that's. That's way down that rabbit hole.
D
Yeah, I think you have a lot of. As long as you try and you really dedicate yourself, you can come back from a lot. Look at fucking Robert Downey Jr. When he was on his tirade of drugs and running from cops and shootouts. You're like, holy shit, that's Iron Man.
B
I mean, look at Steve O. Yeah, Steve.
A
Oh, like shit. Like the. Just the crazy amounts of drug use and stuff like that and like, still able to just, you know, clean. Hey, Ryan Reynolds here for Mint Mobile. You know, one of the perks about having four kids that you know about is actually getting a direct line to the big man up north. And this year he wants you to. To know the best gift that you can give someone is the gift of Mint Mobile's unlimited wireless for $15 a month. Now you don't even need to wrap it. Give it a try@mintmobile.com switch.
B
Upfront payment of $45 for 3 month plan equivalent to $15 per month required new customer offer for first 3 months only. Speed slow after 35 gigabytes if network's busy. Taxes and fees extra.
C
See mintmobile.com Also, like a lot of the homeless people, they're homeless because they choose to be homeless. Every state, every county, every city has social programs, but that's a run by the rules.
B
That's.
C
Yeah, that's what it is to get you. Yeah.
B
To your dog. You can't have this. You can't have alcohol, which I, you know, that's got to be hard. You know, if you're out on the street and your dog's your only friend. But you. They can't go into a shelter with you. I get it. I Get that. It's got to be tough to let that go, but I guess you gotta.
C
Well, that's, that's. That's a small case. Like the dog thing's a small case. A lot of them just, like, they fucking love what they're addicted to and they, they sure, sure, they love that lifestyle.
A
We'll give you, you know, three meals a day. We'll give you a place to sleep. We'll give you this. We'll give you some programs. You just have to pass a drug test every two weeks. And they're like, all right, I'm out. Yep, that's as easy as it is. It's really shitty. Like, it's, it's that they're.
D
That or it's a mental. It's a mental illness too, where they, That's. Yeah, they just want to be out on the streets. And it is something you can't get around. I mean, a lot of. There's a. Homeless vets is a, A very large thing. But they have these opportunities to do other stuff. And I think it's been shown. It's like, oh, yeah, we offered help. They just.
A
Because it would be completely different if there wasn't. If there wasn't programs available.
D
Yeah.
B
Why aren't you helping these people? Even though that is probably the conversation anyway, you know, why aren't you helping these people? But, yeah, you have to have this, some sort of self, you know, motivation to better oneself. That has to be there. And I guess nobody can do it for you. No, but there's this. This is. And I don't know how old all you dudes are, but. So I'm a millennial, I guess. Yeah. Yep, I'm a millennial. The Gen Z people, those people, they're coming up with this whole attitude of I deserve this, this and this. And I've employed a couple of them. And I don't know how good, you know, how good your editing is, but they are the biggest that have ever lived.
A
Good enough for that.
B
They are the worst people. I had an editor, right? He was working at a SMOK store, like, selling like, you know, a tobacco store. And he was making, you know, a couple hundred bucks a week. I don't know how much you get paid at a smoke store. And I said he was a good editor, really good at his job. But I asked, I said, how much do you want, mate? Come to me with an offer, you know, I prove to you me that you are a really good worker, yada, yada, yada. And he goes, I want I want it worked out to be 250k a year. I was like, you're off your fuck. Are you serious? He goes, yeah, I think that's what I'm worth. And me being the very intelligent human being I am, I hired him, but not for that much. And he ended up screwing me over. He was a. But I've had that with other people too. They just, they have this, oh, I deserve this. Because I've done this. I deserve that. And I think that's going to lead to enormous amounts of mental illness, which will lead to enormous. Maybe it is a mental illness. Enormous amounts of people, homeless, on drugs, addicted to pain pills, addicted to alcohol, addicted to cigarette, whatever. They're all just going to find themselves addicted. Finding some sort of addiction will find them or they'll find it and that will be the trajectory of their life because they are so dependent on this outside source of. What's the word?
A
Validation.
B
Validation. And they need it and they feel like they deserve it and they have to keep having it.
D
That dopamine.
B
Yeah, the dopamine. They're all deprived of it if they're not on their phone or they're not doing this. And I guess we're all guilty of that to some extent. But.
C
All right, get off. To get off of the dark thing that we've been talking about. I want to talk about Australia and cinema. Have you watched Mr. In between?
B
Oh, yeah. Oh, no. Oh, mystery. No, no, I have, I have, yes. So I thought you said mystery in Between.
C
No, Mystery in Between.
B
I think that's.
A
Mystery in Between.
B
He's great. That's a great. He's a great actor. I actually watched most of it on TikTok because some dude was putting up all of the little clips from and I was just.
A
What?
B
I think that's one of a very few shows to go quite viral from just TikTok sort of thing.
A
It was.
D
Dude, I. I forget who was the one.
C
Yeah, you showed it to me years ago.
D
Like, holy shit. This is the best portrayal of just a dark comedy. The acting, you just feel like you're living the moment with what is going on and you're just there for the ride.
A
Shout outs. Our boy. Fucking Scott Ryan.
C
Yeah, Scott Ryan.
A
I almost said Sean Ryan.
C
Wrong guy, Wrong one. You. Because you showed it to me and then I hit him up on Instagram and me and Brandon had like a two hour phone call with him.
B
Yeah.
D
Just.
C
Just talking about the show and all sorts of stuff.
A
He's incredibly interested in the JFK shooting.
B
Okay.
D
I Forgot about that.
A
Yeah, that was. That was definitely a big topic of discussion. Is the conspiracy behind the. The JFK assassination.
D
Do you know. Okay. You know the actor, the main actor in that.
B
Yeah, yeah.
A
He wrote, directed the Harvey Oswald.
B
Oh, yeah.
D
But the actor, he did all.
B
He did it all. Wow. Okay.
D
And he was offered, hey, we'll give you X amount of money for another season. A fourth season. He's like, no, I'm good.
A
Really?
D
He's like, that's how I wanted to finish the story. And he.
A
Well, no, because it's not finished. I think he wanted to do another. Another season.
D
No shit. I read the.
A
They were doing it to, like, another network and he, like, disagreed with the way they wanted to run it or how they wanted to do it, I think. But it wasn't finished yet.
D
No shit.
C
It was Disney plus, wasn't it?
D
No. If you're not touching my fucking, we're.
C
Making you gay and black.
D
It's a weird switch for season four.
A
Congratulations, you're now being played by Lizzo.
B
Brandon, do you need.
A
Not one more time. You got this, buddy.
B
Brandon, can you. Brandon, do you.
A
Almost there, buddy.
D
Brandon, where do you store your firearms?
A
All over my house. In every crevice.
D
Well, do I have the product for you, Nick. Show em. Here, Hand it to me, Brandon, so I can show you. Brandon, this is Stopbox. Stop Box, we love box.
A
You're selling me.
D
What's in the box? You have to open it and find out.
A
All right, well, let's see if I can do this.
B
Oh, wow. Look at that.
C
Oh, can I hide my goop in that?
D
You can hide your goop in that. Cody. Cody, do you know why I love this thing? Why? Why?
B
Why? God, why?
D
Because you don't have to use keys. Gun not included.
A
Cody, you've got multiple cats in your house. Including Squirt, who's quite the scrapper.
C
Mm.
A
Would you want Squirt to have access to your firearms?
B
No, he's violent.
A
Well, then Stopbox is the perfect product for you. No cats getting inside, dad.
D
Or people without thumbs. The nice part is it is actually TSA compliant.
A
I didn't actually know that part until a couple months ago. That is actually really cool. You just put a little lock through there.
D
Exactly.
C
When you check in a pistol or any gun, if there's a hole that a lot can go through on whatever you're checking your gun in, you have to put a lock through that. This has one hole, so you just need one lock.
B
Easily accessible.
C
Once you land on the ground.
A
I know you're not normally a one hole kind of guy, but this is definitely an exception to the rule.
C
Never worry about tariffs because everything is sourced right here in the usa.
D
Wait, what are tariffs?
A
I'm pretty sure I shot a few.
B
Of them for a limited time only.
D
Get 10% off your entire order if you use Code unsubscribe checkout. And right now, if you buy one stop box, you're gonna get another stop box free. So that's 10 off plus buy one, get one free. When you use code unsub at checkout. That's stopboxusa.com discover a better way to.
C
Balance security and readiness with Stopbox.
D
Stopboxusa.com use code unsubscribe.
B
There's another great show. There was like 10 seasons of this show and each season is based on a different time period. But Underbelly, I don't know if you've.
A
Ever heard of it. I've never heard of it.
B
But the first season of Underbelly is about the Melbourne crime family sort of thing in the late 90s, early 2000s and about a lot of hits that happened and that type of stuff.
D
Australian, crazy Aussie.
B
Yeah, yeah.
D
I wouldn't. Yeah.
B
What'd you say, bro?
C
Oh, that's an Aussie bass. Like.
D
Yeah, yeah.
B
So it was all. All in Melbourne about the Carlton Crew and this guy called fucking. What was his name? It's been a long time since I've watched it, but really, really good. Highly recommend it. The rest of the ones went back a little bit further in history, so they're all more period pieces and they were good. But the Australian film industry's fucking aids. All right. It's just terrible. You have to this. It has been.
D
Yeah, it's a 10 year. So this is based off of a whole.
B
That dude at the front, there's Vince Colossimo and he's a great actor. He's just an Italian dude. But the Italian dude who has been in the film industry in Australia for a long time, he's very, very good. But in. To get funding in Australia to do any sort of filming, you have to, you know, tick the boxes. I had to. I did like a documentary series where I went out and did ghost hunts and went looking for Bigfoot and Australia. The Yowie. The Aboriginal people in Australia have the story of the Yowie. Like everyone has. Every indigenous peoples have their own story which. Which points to the whole gigantic Pythagoras.
C
Because they're like the type of shit.
D
Sorry.
A
Like the Nephilim, like So everybody's got like, oh, hairy guy.
B
Yeah. They've all got their own story, which points to the whole idea. Has to be something, right? But the. The yowie is the Australian version.
A
Never heard of that.
B
Yeah. So we went looking for that and we found these guys. Who? This one guy. I can't remember his name. Dan or Dave. It's not important at all, but I just feel bad. But he was this older dude, same heat heaps, legit. And he was telling us about his Yowie sighting. And it was up in the glass house mountains in the Sunshine coast. This beautiful area right on the beach. Gorgeous.
A
You made those words up, right?
B
Doesn't it sound like Chat GPT wrote it? And we went looking and he. He goes, I saw my first Yowie sighting. He was there and he just come out of the trees. And I'm convinced he's an interdimensional being. And just this random dude, he starts talking about interdimensional beings. Actually, you know what that. Fuck all that earlier.
D
All that earlier.
B
We'll talk about. Yeah, he's turned. Earlier we meet this guy who's got a haunted dollar. He's a part of the area.
A
Haunted doll.
B
Yep, haunted doll.
D
Okay.
A
Like an Annabelle kind of.
B
Yeah, it was. It was more of like a picture. A wooden. Almost like a Pinocchio looking doll, but without like the nose. It was just. It just looked horrifying. Right.
A
I like that.
D
But it's haunted.
B
Haunted. And it kept, like, beating his wife.
C
Oh, yeah, that's what was doing it.
A
Yeah.
D
So, buddy, what happened? Make sure you put on your helmet.
A
Listen, at night you got a shot of the conspiracy. But I do have a theory.
B
There was a second shooter. Is that what you're saying? Somebody checked the grassy null.
D
Honey, are you.
A
Is your bag on?
B
Beat the shit out of her.
D
Oh, the ghost is here again, man.
A
The ghost only visits when dinner's burnt.
B
So. So.
C
Some people's kids, man.
B
And he's telling us this story and he's showing us photos of his wife's black eyes and all this type of stuff. And she's there, she's next to us, and we're all going, oh, no. It's so hard to be like, I'm so sorry. That's how. And she's there. Like she was off ahead on something. I don't know if it's like she looked like. Looked like pain pills or something like that. Like she was just out of it or drunk or. I don't know. But yeah, he kept showing us These videos. And then he showed these videos he's had like this live stream and he like zoomed through like, you know, on his. On his phone. He showed. Yeah, look at moves. See that it moves.
A
It's like as he's in the background.
C
I imagine the little doll on top of her at night with his limp little heart just like doing that. On top of her.
A
Yeah. Like, I don't know if you know.
B
Mass, but he's doing it again. So.
A
Yeah, the bruises are weirdly not the size of the doll's hands.
B
Yeah, the giant fucking blast arms.
A
4.
C
Just his little floppy arms.
D
Oh my God. Just little sticks.
B
So you called the police? So we. I didn't have my phone. There was no reception. There was a lot of other reasons I didn't call the police. Had nothing to do with me. But he was showing this in front of like a huge group of people. So don't blame her. But yeah, it was. It was. It was different. And I. We didn't find the yowie, but we.
D
Definitely found domestic violence.
A
Yeah.
B
Allegedly and abuser.
A
Yeah.
B
No, well, the old backhanded doll. Yeah, it's not good. But yeah, that was. That was cool. We'll be right back. My wife.
A
You know what I would like to see while we're. While we're talking about like Australian cinema and stuff like that. I don't know if this has ever been done, but I would love to see it if it has. If it hasn't been, somebody needs to jump on it. I would love to see a really well made movie about Ned Kelly.
B
So there is one. Have you seen?
A
No, I have not. That's why I brought it up. I didn't know if that was a thing.
B
There is a great movie from early 2000s. It's got. Who's in it? Let me pull up.
A
Me. So for those who don't know Ned Kelly, it's basically to my understanding, which is very limited understanding is basically like the Australian Jesse James to a degree.
B
Yeah. Yeah. So 2003, it's got Heath Ledger playing Ned Kelly.
C
No, really?
B
I recommend this movie to everyone and it's got Orlando Bloom in it as well, playing one of his brothers. God damn. It is a great movie. I actually based a tour trailer off that where I was dressed as Ned Kelly.
A
No shit? Yeah. Do you know the whole Ned Kelly thing?
B
I do not know.
A
At the very end, like his. The thing he's famous for. And they still have it in a museum. I'm pretty sure.
B
Yeah, I've seen it.
A
He Has a. That's so.
B
So where he was hung and everything in old Melbourne jail where he was hung. I've seen his suit of armor. It's in the. Yep. He's like Iron Man.
A
He built a metal suit to have a shootout with the cops. I'll show you photo, but this is in the 18, late 1800s. Wait, editor, pull up that metal suit because it's insane. Pull up like the actual one in the museum. And then like the paintings of him.
B
That's not him. That's a giant statue. So it's a weird thing to show.
C
You crazy outlaw like Jesse James is an American suit.
B
Yeah, that's the one that I saw in Melbourne. Yeah. So it's got like. Would it be musket balls or I.
C
Guess from back in the day there that went through.
B
I think.
A
Yeah. They might have had mini balls by that time.
B
What is it, 1860s? Maybe thereabouts. 1830s. I don't know.
D
Dude, that art, it's cool.
B
So he's like a folklore hero because even though he killed police officers and stuff like that, he was like. They were all sort of treated badly at the time by the police. And, you know, Paul Whitefield people. You know, I feel that I get treated badly by the police because of the color of my skin.
A
Like a Robin Hood type.
B
Yeah, and that. And so Ned Kelly, I'm pretty sure. Benny. Scottish. He was Scottish. I'm pretty sure Irish. And so the English were the coppers.
A
Fucking show over there.
B
Like, hell. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, so all the English and the English treatment, they moved halfway across the.
A
World to still shoot the British.
B
Exactly. But the British were horrible people to the Irish and the Scottish taking them over for years. The potato famine, all that type of stuff.
A
I heard there were some troubles over this.
B
Yeah, well, that's the Scott. That's the Irish and the Irish. Yeah, Irish and the Irish first. Well, the English, you know, it's a whole thing.
D
Irish, Irish. He was Irish.
C
Ir. Something. I can't remember.
B
He was Irish, right? What year was it he died in 86. Fuck, I nailed that. 1860s. Go Butterfield.
D
His father died in 1866.
A
1879, I think was the armor thing.
D
He died. Yeah, 1880 is when he died at age 25. He built that shit in.
B
Yeah.
A
So the grain, he wasn't iron man.
B
It was. He bent some steel.
D
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
B
And he had metal floating around on his body. And he used this iron cauldron thing.
D
To protect his heart from the metal.
B
It was crazy. Ahead of his time, but not Iron Man. So at the. At the Glenn Rowan steam powered suit. Kelly built this in a cave with a box of scraps.
D
The loudest. Iron Man, 16 powered. Oh, the autism.
A
Love it.
B
Oh, my God. So that tastes like shit. So it's tequila. Why am I drinking tequila?
A
Tequila smash.
B
So the story is great. The story's great. The shootout happens at the Glenrowan Hotel. I think off the top of my head. And, you know, he robs the banks on the way. All on horse. And it lives out in the bush. He's hiding from everyone. And there's all these tales of different sort of, you know, bushrangers and stuff living up and down the coasts of Australia at this time. But he has this shootout with all these police. They bring in this South African, like, almost like a general to take him down. And they've got all these outrageous rewards for his capture. They all want him dead. And he runs out, his brother's dying. The gunfight, he runs out with his suit of armor on, shooting at the police. Like, it's just like a mad story of man versus government, that type of thing, you know, against the man.
A
You always have these cool stories of like, you know, the Robin Hoods, the Jesse James is like the American equivalent, I would think.
D
Think.
A
And then. But Ned Kelly's is so interesting because you cap it off. Like you have all these stories that, you know, obviously they've been hyperbolized over the years and stuff like that, you know, added stories to it that may or may not have happened or probably didn't happen that way. But then Ned fucking Kelly caps it off with this legendary gunfight with that suit of armor is just so unique.
B
Yeah, People love it. And that movie, it's been a long time since I've seen it, but it's good.
D
I've never heard of this guy before.
B
Really?
D
Yeah. This is the first time I've ever heard this story.
B
That's really cool.
C
Do you know. Okay, could you guess what movie?
B
I mean, I'm a young.
C
I'm a young man. It's like 1999. My dad's cooking breakfast on a Saturday morning. This comes up on Spike tv. It's my first introduction to Australia. Cowboy movie.
B
A cowboy movie? Yeah.
A
I already know.
C
You already know Quigley Down Under? Yep.
B
Never heard of it.
A
That Long Shot. The fucking Shooting Jug or whatever.
D
You've never heard of Quigley Down Under?
B
No, that was. That.
A
That was.
B
Is that like Outback Steakhouse? Like no one in Australia. That was.
C
That was the first time I've ever heard of Australia.
B
Yeah, right. No, we, we. There's no Quiggly.
C
They. They hire this old cowboy guy to go down and shoot Tom Selleckies.
A
Dude.
B
Oh my God.
C
They hired him to shoot Aborigines.
B
It looks like a.
D
It has like Alan Rickman's in it.
C
Yeah, Rickman's the bad guy.
D
Yeah, yeah, Rickman's the bad guy in it. It's like a big. It's a large western.
C
Yeah, right.
B
There's a lot of great Australian movies, but no, I haven't, I haven't seen that. Well, there's a couple of good Australian movies.
C
Not a lot, but he's using a Sharps.52 Buffalo rifle.
B
I thought you were going to say Crocodile Dundee, the famous shot.
A
I was actually shocked. I'm shocked to find out now that it was actually filmed in Victoria, Australia.
B
Yeah, right. Okay. Well, the Victorian sort of landscape is very green and lush and sort of like almost like a rainforest meets a farm.
D
Really?
B
Really like not, you know, big trees and that type of stuff, but more just this beautiful greenery and lush cool sort of temperature. It's a very nice part. Real woke people in Victoria. Like just the worst people of all time. Just all blue haired, painful pieces of shit that deserve.
A
So anyway, Austin.
D
Yeah, I know you're going to Austin tomorrow. You're like, damn it, yeah.
C
But we're gonna give you a Sharps 52 rifle to take with you. I think through all of our years in business on the Internet, we've all used Shopify. I've used it for merch and my skate shop and a couple other businesses.
D
I will actually agree 100% on that. Everything we do is run through Shopify.
A
Even bunkers run through Shopify.
D
Our shoes, which is a separate company is run through Shopify and they talk together because of Shopify.
A
Shopify runs the world.
D
Did you know Shopify will actually help you design a website also?
B
Cody?
A
I know.
C
I didn't know about starting an online store when I started my career online. And Shopify just made it super, super easy for my dumb.
B
Brandon.
D
What happens if people haven't heard about my brand?
A
No, that's actually easy, Eli. Shopify helps you find your customers with easy to use email and social media campaigns.
D
Step Cody, what happens if I get stuck?
C
Shopify is always around to share advice with their award winning 24. 7 customer service.
D
Step support. Bro, you got my back and your front. Shopify helps millions of businesses around the.
C
World and 10% of all e commerce.
A
In the US from household names like Mattel or Gymshark to new brands.
D
Just getting started on some shoes on some merch bunker.
C
No, we've all been doing this for over a decade and Shopify is the easiest e commerce platform we've ever used.
A
I think every single one of us has used Shopify at one point.
D
I think all our businesses right now are using Shopify.
A
Oh, except mine. But because it's guns can't do that.
D
Just one of them can't turn those dreams into sfx Cha Ching Shopify New.
A
Cell Sound and give them the best shot at success with Shopify.
B
Sign up for your $1 per month.
C
Trial and start selling today at shopify.com.
D
Unsubpod shopify.com unsubpod the problem with the.
B
Difference between Australia and like full on lefties and the American ones is I feel like what people would say is woke in Austin isn't woke enough in Victoria. Well, maybe, maybe I don't know enough about Austin.
A
You're probably right. I will say that. I was just gonna say, like not to. I've never been there, but I would assume that I would take an Austin lefty over a Victoria lefty.
B
So Melbourne, which is in Victoria, protests every weekend, all the time, always about something similar. They're always protesting. They hate comedy even though they have the Melbourne Comedy Festival. They hate any comedian that dare go there and say something that's unjust or punching down. Punching down is the big thing in comedy that you're not allowed to do in Australia.
A
Every good piece of comedy has a victim, though.
B
Like that's, that's why I've been cancelled five times. And I'm not trying to be like, look at me, I've been cancelled 5. They're not by crazy things either. One was an Aboriginal joke, one was a Christchurch massacre joke, right? Hilarious stuff. Another one was I got a Holocaust joke I got in the Israel. Yeah, the Israel Times because of that. They wrote a piece of me. The crime reporter from the Herald sun in Melbourne called me up after that, right? They called, they called me for comment about a joke about the Holocaust. I said, allegedly. I said, I did to this lady. I said to this lady, if you can't. She complained to me about a Holocaust joke in email. And I replied, if you can't stand the heat, stay out of the oven. That's all I said, right? And it shouldn't have been an email form. That's not good. All right, that's not good.
A
Like, I have one regret. I put it in writing 100% because.
B
The screenshot was in the fucking article.
D
It was a joke.
B
It's right there and it looks horrible.
D
Did you say it? Yes, that is my email.
B
He's there texting, you know, at home, going, you fucking. Yada, yada, yada. And I just. I was about to walk on stage, so I was fired up. I was like, yep, I'm ready. I'm ready to go. And she sends me that. And I go, if you can't stand the heat. I thought it was hilarious. Anyway, I was.
C
I feel like as a comedian, it's okay to punch down as long as you punch down on everyone.
B
Yeah, yeah. Not white people. But, yeah, I agree. And that's what. That's my personal opinion.
A
And that in itself was a joke. And it's like, oh, you just feed it. Because to me, the most important thing with comedy is, like, context.
B
Yeah.
A
Like, there's not actual. Like, it's not a fucking hate crime. You're just being funny.
B
Yeah, absolutely.
A
And you don't have to find it funny. That's fine. Like, it's just. Understand that it's said in jest.
B
So last time I was on this show, I was telling a story about being taken to the Human Rights Commission, and that happened after a joke about Aboriginal people.
D
Now, he had to, like, had to.
A
This is like, court mandated.
D
You had to go to court about this.
B
So court. It was like a. To front a board of, you know, officials sort of thing. So call it court, call it, call it whatever you want. The Human Rights Commission of Queensland Land came to me because I put a post on TikTok of me performing stand up. Just two jokes. And this lady, one lady complained about it. Said she feared for her life and her children's lives because she was a part of the Aboriginal community in Australia. And these jokes weren't like, you know, they were mean, but they weren't that bad. It was just about trans people and average whatever, you know, normal stuff. Normal around the dinner table sort of stuff.
A
I'm very curious on the joke.
B
No, it was literally about their. I'd never seen personally a transgender person who was also Aboriginal. Maybe they were hard to find because all the ladies already looked like dudes.
D
Whether I'm worried about hosting or just giving that perfect gift, creating a delicious holiday for my loved ones is super important to me. From effortless holiday hostings to unforgettable gifts, Omaha Steaks delivers the world's best steak experience. They've always been super convenient in giving me the most high quality steaks. I Could ask for. Whether for myself or a loved one, Omaha Steaks offers unrivaled quality and variety, and every bite is backed by their 100% guarantee. Save big on gourmet gifts and more holiday favorites with omaha Steaks. Visit OmahaSteaks.com and for an extra $35 off, use code YUM at checkout. Terms apply. See site for details. That's Omaha Steaks.com promo code YUM. Go to OmahaSteaks.com and use code YUM at checkout for an extra $35 off minimum purchase. May apply. See site for details. A big thanks to our advertiser. Omaha Steaks.
B
That's all it was. That's all it was.
A
That's so, like, on the scale of like one to ten offensive, that's like a six and a half.
B
Not that bad. And also not true. There are very attractive aboriginal ladies. I've never seen them. They're very. They're. I've heard about them.
A
You're sure they're there?
B
I'm sure they are. I don't want to do the chatgpt.
A
It just like the yowie.
B
No, is. I'm not. I'm not connecting the dots, though.
C
I'll do it.
B
I don't live there now, but. So, yeah, so they said to me, you have to appear in front of this board, this committee on this date. And it was the date that my son was due that week. And so I was like, I'm not going to that. And they're like, fine, well, we'll give you another date. And I said, I'm not going to that.
A
But you met your. The birth of your son. You're like, I'm not going.
D
I got there. Thing.
A
Sorry.
B
Rules is rules. I literally got served papers in it, like a manila folder, the whole thing. And it's a far drive, right? It was a. Oh, it's like from here to California, maybe eight. Eight hours. I don't know if that's further. Probably further.
D
Imagine making a joke and then being like, you have to go here.
B
I didn't even do the joke in that state.
D
I know. That's what's wild to me.
B
And here to Cali's like 15 hours. Okay. So it's a long drive.
C
Yeah, that's a long one.
B
So. But like an hour flight or whatever it was to Queensland still. I'm not gonna drive an hour. I'm not gonna go and find.
A
Why did you have to go there?
B
Exactly. It didn't even happen there. Yeah, TikTok's not there. TikTok's not based in Queensland.
A
So anyway, you flew to China.
B
Bite Dance. Great to see you. So this went on for two years and only just got rectified last year, where they dropped the case, obviously. But yeah, I was asking my lawyer, who, by the way, great guy, but is a lawyer in conveyancing and has no idea to do with anything to do with, you know, fucking this shit. And no one did.
D
No, it's a completely. A lot of people don't understand. You have to be very specific with your lawyer depending on what you're doing. Yeah.
B
It has to be different lawyers. Yes.
D
Otherwise the lawyers are like, I don't. Fuck it, dude.
B
I don't know.
D
Speed tickets, dog. I don't know. This entrepreneur or entertainment lawyer versus a contract lawyer.
B
So we had no idea. And it went on and then. And the, you know, I got letters saying that it had advanced to the next step and she wanted me to be trained and apologize. That was the big thing. She wanted me to undergo training, sensitivity training and apologize. And so basically since that as a comedian. Oh, dude. But you don't understand what the comedy industry is like in Australia. It's like, do not cross the boundaries or you are. You're not going. Because it's built on the back of tv. There's this thing called the International Comedy Festival in Melbourne and that goes on the TV every year. @ least it was this way when I started 11 years ago. Right. It was built on the back of if you were going to be famous, if you were going to make money. And these guys can only sell tickets in Melbourne and Sydney, by the way. They can't do it anywhere else. They. You have to go on the tv. You have to be G rated enough. You could probably go pg, that sort of thing, which, you know, why? What, what's that? You guys have PG? Yeah, I mean, PG 13 sort of thing. Still, kid, that sort of.
D
Thing.
B
You. You have to play by their rules or they're just gonna snub you. They're going, nah, not.
A
Happening. So you can't even.
B
Swear. You could probably. They could get away with like one or two.
A
Fucks. Yeah. That's not PG.
B
Here. No. So that's PG 13.
A
Right? PG 13. You get like.
B
One. Yeah, yeah, right? Yeah. So three.
A
Shirts. Is it.
B
Really? Yeah.
A
Yeah. Three.
B
Shits. One, two cum.
C
Slots. No, you get like three to five.
D
Shits. It's a nice mathematical equation.
B
Yeah. If you throw one cum slot in, you can only have a.
C
One. But I know if I made your joke in America. I wouldn't have to do two years of my life trying to make up for it in the.
A
Court. Well, I'm just shocked that there's a. There. There's a legal ramification to.
B
A. So I kept asking that question. I was like, what are the. Can I be locked up here? Can I be fined? And the lawyer kept going. There's no sort.
A
Of.
B
Of. There's no case that I can go off here. There's no case law. This hasn't been tried those type of things in New South Wales. Right. Now, I just wrote a video on it and I filmed it before I came over to America about a new New South Wales law that has been put in place to curb anti Semitism. Right. Because there's too much anti Semitism. I was doing it back before it was cool. That was the big thing. When I did the Jew joke, they were like, you hate Jews. Like, I don't know any Jews, right? I'm from Newcastle, Australia. There's two Jews.
A
Here.
B
Here. All right. And they work at the bank if you want to talk to.
A
Them.
B
Allegedly. And I'll be.
D
Damned. Surprise.
B
Pikachu. And yeah, so I completely lost my place again. It must be the tequila. But, yeah, it's the Jew. It's the Jews. Well, they're running the world and.
A
Running. Scrambled your neural link.
B
Boss.
A
It's. Yeah, it's that fucking meme of like, oh, yeah. When I finally. Or when everybody's got the Elon Musk neural link and somebody cuts me off in traffic. So I hack into his to make him gender.
D
Dysphoric.
C
Me. Now I.
A
Cast. So think you're.
B
Pretty. The New South Wales law. Right? That's what I was trying to. I was trying to talk about. And I sidetracked myself again. The law is. Now this has been sort of passed through. It's the same in Victoria or similar in Victoria. They passed it like at night, too. Was one of those sort of things. Like, it happens overnight. So.
A
Sus. Everything good gets passed in the COVID of.
B
Night. There's three people.
A
There. That's how you know this is out for everybody's best.
B
Interest. Where. And I don't have the exact word, you know, this is not verbatim, but the. The sort of general understanding around it is if you say something that could be construed as advocating violence, which means. Which means anything, by the way.
A
Now construed is the.
B
Problem. Right? So not construed. But for a reasonable person would say that it's. And because it's so vague Anyone with enough money can argue that case in court. Basically, if I say something about Jews, you know, you come for me for that. You can drag me through court if you want to, if you really wanted to. If I say something about aboriginal people or anyone, you can do.
A
That. And does it have to have taken place in.
B
Australia? It has to take place in Australia, which is why you're talking on special. I'm gonna go off. Which is what in the. In the law. At the end of it, it basically says there is no exceptions. Comedy's not protected. Satire is not protected. No one, no one is protected. Film, no. Someone feels like they have been attacked and it's calling for violence. Which. And this is the thing, it sounds good, it sounds like it's protecting people, violence, bad. But that's not what it's doing. It's opening you up to having your very words that you speak and the thoughts that you think being controlled by people who don't have a vested interest in your best.
A
Interest. In my mind, no. Using the words of the law, no reasonable person would assume a fucking comedy set is a call to.
B
Violence. Yeah, exactly. So who are these reasonable people? Reasonable in what circles? Because what is offensive to me is not very reasonable to other.
D
People. You know, I swear that's terrifying to.
B
Me. Just getting. I mean, it should be a lot of.
D
Trouble. This group would.
B
Be. I would not tour 100%. I would not tour with the UK right now. I won't do.
D
It. Oh, no. Fuck.
B
No. No.
D
Way. Hell no. Not right.
B
Now. Graham. Is it Graham or Lyman? The dude, the comic that just got arrested. So he got arrested for anti trans posts on.
C
X.
B
Okay. Armed police five armed police arrested this dude. He created black books, you know Black books, the show. Great show, great comedy. Got Dylan Moran in it. And what's old mate's name. I've seen him live in concept. Bill Bailey. Great show. Really, really good show. Anyway, you should watch it. He was arrested when he came. Was he back from the airport or whatever. He come back in the country, just did rogue and all that type of stuff and he came back in the country, let's say. And yeah, they were just waiting for him at his house or his place of work. Arrested him because he made these posts and now he turned up in court actually with a trans sign on. Like, I don't know what, this wasn't like. I love trans, but it was like, like a. Questioning the trans.
C
Rhetoric. Think I remember that. He's standing in front of the courthouse with a big sign on. Yeah, it's like I, I think it said, I think it said like, protect our kids or something like.
B
That. Trans kids don't.
C
Exist. Yeah, trans kids don't exist or.
B
Something like something like that. And so that was his, you know, that was a great statement to make, but he has literally been arrested at gunpoint by people who were there to protect him, his family, everyone at the direction of someone who's been elected potentially for something that he said on the fucking Internet. And that is crazy. And that is what's happening in Australia. And this is what happens when you give up your guns like.
A
That. That's something that. I think they just went over that on the most recent at time of recording anyway, episode of Creep Cat, because they were making fun of like British fiction, like dystopian fiction, you know, V for Vendetta or whatever it is. It's always the same thing. What if our government wasn't made of good people? Like, that's all their dystopian shit. And I'm like, well, I hate to break it to, to you, but pretty much no government is made of good.
B
People. Yeah.
D
The. That's the wild thing is that idea. It's just going to be inherently good because it's.
B
Government. And this is the same with laws. It's the same with laws being like, in Australia. I say this in videos that I make about this topic. It's like, you might support this now because you are some woke lefty piece of shit, but who's to say that it's not going to be a far right leader in a hundred years time and this is going to be written in law that you're celebrating right now, and it's going to be used.
A
Against whoever that was something relevant to like at time of recording anyway. God knows when this comes out, but about the, the whole like the transgender shooting stuff and like just talking about like, like, oh, well, you know, the DOJ is now looking at classifying that as a mental illness and whatnot. I'm like, well, hey, how about we, we take a breath and we think this through because like, okay, whether you agree with that or not, the thing is any tool that can be used, that can be wielded for you can be wielded against you. So what's going to stop the next far left administration? Cause the pendulum always swings one way or the other. Definitely. You know, we'll be back there at some point. We'll survive it just like we always have. It is what it is. But what's going to stop them from saying that. Okay? Now, if we're talking about the federal government, specifically the executive branch of government has the ability to declare something, a mental illness to where you can't have a firearm and you're no longer due your second amendment rights, it's going to stop them from saying. All right, now, Eli, if you've claimed PTSD on your disability rating from what you were owed from the government for serving your country, you are no longer able to buy.
B
Firearms.
A
Yeah. And you are no longer able to be a legal gun owner. Like, that's a real slippery slope. You got to be.
B
Careful. Anxiety, adhd, autism, all of these things that people could say are mental disorders or mental illnesses, they all fall under that.
A
Spectrum. Everybody's jumping over obstacles to find another acronym to have and. Yeah, yeah, that.
D
Would. If you put that on paper where it's like, hey, a mental health. Okay, well, now, it's a very.
B
Broad term, but it sounds.
D
Good. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It's.
A
Like.
D
Notoriously.
A
Yeah. The road to heaven paved with good.
B
Intention. Oh, my.
D
God. It's the perfect jeans.
B
Right? I can leave. Get on his shoulders up here, big.
D
Boy. Try the perfect jeans out as earmuffs. Brandon, how perfect are.
A
They? Feels like the perfect.
D
Jeans. They're so flexible. I'm fat. I can actually do squats I them. Usually that's an.
B
Issue. I'm not.
A
Kidding. I'm picturing you do doing squats in the gym with these.
D
Jeans. I could. Dude, they are.
A
Like. Eli's just mogging on the audience right.
D
Now. Finn, make my dick talk. Now you're watching the ad and pant season is almost here. It's always pants season if you're a.
A
Adult. It's August in Texas. We're all wearing.
D
Jeans. The perfect jeans. That's right. Today we're talking about the perfect gene. Brandon, how my jeans feel on your.
A
Neck? Feels like I need to talk to.
D
Hr. But they were comfortable.
B
Right?
D
Absolutely. This brand, the perfect gene, it's actually perfect. It's real denim, but not the heavy stuff. I just like how they finally say that. We can say your khakis, which works great pretty much everywhere except for Boston, I'm.
A
Sure. Just means the valet is quitting. For a limited time. Our listeners get 5015 off their first order plus free shipping at ThePerfectGene.
D
NYC or Google the Perfect Gene and use code UNSUB15 to get 15 off. It's finally time to stop crushing your balls and wear comfortable jeans. By going to ThePerfectGene NYC, our listeners get 15 off their first order plus free shipping. It's lighter, softer.
A
Stretchier. And it's not a sex toy, not with that.
D
Attitude. Use that.
A
One. And again, that's free returns, free exchanges. When you use code unsub15 at.
D
Checkout, that's 15% off at checkout for the perfect jeans. Connor loves perfect jeans. He does. They fit him really nice. Oh, pants. But yeah, it's crazy seeing any of that. And that slippery slope of hey, what defines mental illness? Because we talked about that the other day. It's like, oh well, PTSD can then go up on the chalking block of hey, this is not oh well, if they don't have guns, they.
B
Can'T. And you could argue that someone with PTSD shouldn't have a firearm. Yeah, you know, like that's a very, that's a very clear argument there that that person has, particularly if it's a war environment or someone has been in combat or whatever. You know, these people have been around guns going off and now they're anxious and they're crazy and they're depressed and they've got this and they're this.
A
The rates of violence and all sorts of things. That's why like, I don't advocate for that because I think that that would be a stupid thing thing to do. Like, that's because like it leads to A, I just think it's immoral. But B, if you create an environment where veterans with PTSD are afraid of seeking help because they're afraid of losing their gun rights, you've made the problem ten times.
B
Worse.
A
Yeah. So on top of all that, like, I just think it's a bad idea, but I think that there's more legal basis there for it, which is why we really have to be.
B
Careful. Yeah. And, and you can see with countries like ours, mine, the, how easy the government will just step in and take something. And you know, you guys, there's a, there's big talk in America that you can defend yourself against the government but put that into practice. Kit, like what.
D
Happens? I think hope you know what I mean. People don't want war or they think it's like ah, this but once you cross a specific line, like a.
B
Civil wars, like they're very. But. But then again, in my mind I think that's never going to man, a lot of things have happened the last 10 years that were never going to.
D
Happen. That's a scary.
C
Thing. Everyone has a home and a.
B
Family. Well, okay, but what this is, this is the thing about guns. I don't have guns? How do I protect my family? I can't have. I can't have brass knuckles in my house. What are you using that baseball bat that's. That's under your bed.
D
For? I. Dude, it is a wild thing to me is being over there any place and it's like, okay, I hear somebody breaking into my house. I have a bat. I'd be like, fuck me, dude. That's a wild mindset in my head. I would freak.
B
Out. They recently rejected New Castle Law in Australia, which is to defend your Castle Castle doctrine. Yes. They recently voted against that.
C
Without. Without guns. Even with guns. That's insane. Because we all have bedside.
A
Guns. Yeah.
B
Yeah. Like.
A
Multiple. Like, yeah.
C
Yeah. Like, we have. Do we have.
D
Machines? I think that's scary. Machine guns, everything. And there.
A
Was. If I got met. If I was breaking into somebody's house and I got met by the challenger, and all I see is.
D
The. The silhouette of a naked man with a strap on. I'm like, why is he flaccid and.
B
Hard? Oh, no. What took you so.
D
Long? The naked feet slapping and the door.
C
Locking. Oh, no, no.
B
No. You turn around, there's no handle. Like a cop. The handle goes.
D
In. The handle goes.
A
In. You just hear the door lock, and he swats the handle off the.
C
Door. You're in my world now.
A
Buddy. You think I'm trapped in here with.
B
You. You're trapped in here with me. But there's nothing to. When we were in Florida a couple years ago, we went there. I used to do work for the ufc, and we went there, and I lost that because of the aboriginal joke, by the.
A
Way.
B
Really?
A
Yeah. Oh, that's so.
B
Gay. And although I became friendly with. I don't want to say, like, mates, but, like, I'd like to say mates, but he probably wouldn't with Dana.
D
White. And.
B
He. I told him about it. I said to him, mate, like, I'm not trying to. You know, I'm not trying to beg for anything. But the. The ufc, Australia's let me go because of these jokes. They said the fighters don't want to work with me, all this type of stuff. And he said that no one gets cancelled by the.
A
Ufc. And hell yeah, he.
B
Even. Dana, yeah, he went in, he went, no comment. Cut it.
A
Out. We can cut that if you.
B
Want. He went into Batman for me, and the guy who fired me got.
D
Fired.
A
That's. Oh, that's awesome. Because Dana has always, like, he stood by fighters. He's just like, nah, that. We don't do that.
B
Here. Yeah, you don't, you know, you don't attack someone's freedom to speak how they want in his.
A
World. And you can hate that guy like if he, let's say he's got a fighter that's saying all sorts of, like, crazy off the wall. Like, you're, you're more than welcome to hate that guy if you don't want to support him. You. More like that is your vote with your dollar, you know, but no.
B
That'S. And so we were in Florida at a gun expo and the, this Claire was talking to this lady about pepper spray and she's like, oh, Claire said, oh, we don't have pep. We can't have pepper spray either. That's illegal. It's a firearm in Australia. Oh, yeah, Go to jail for.
A
It. So what you can have is Echelon, the spicy flavors of Echelon where you shake it up and just spray it at a guy. Fucking capsaicin in a.
B
Can. And so she's like, how do you defend yourself? Oh, we just hope the police get there quickly sort of thing. That's what we do. We call the police, hope they get there. Because people go to jail all the time for either murdering or severely harming an intruder all the time. I'm sure that happens here.
A
Too. No, not.
B
Really.
A
Really? No, no, you can. Somebody's in your house, you can pretty much. There's some states where it's pretty rough. Like you get like Massachusetts, California, stuff like.
D
That.
A
That. Where especially if you got these super liberal DAs where they just want to stick it to, you know, gun owners, you know, that's their ability. They, they can legislate from the, from the.
B
Gavel.
A
Yep. And that's, that's the up part. But no, no, for the most part, somebody breaks into your house with intent to do harm to you or your property, you can clap.
B
Them. Which is how it should be.
D
Without. The holidays mean more travel, more shopping, more time online, and more personal.
B
Info in more places that could expose.
D
You more to identity.
B
Theft. But LifeLock monitors millions of data points per second. If your identity is stolen, our US based restoration specialists will fix it, guaranteed your money back. Don't face drained accounts, fraudulent loans or financial losses alone. Get more holiday fun and less holiday worry with.
D
LifeLock. Save up to 40% your first.
B
Year. Visit LifeLock.com.
A
Podcast. Terms apply. Don't even go to jail for the most.
B
Part. And you shouldn't. You can't come into my fucking house.
D
What. What.
B
Is. So, yeah, in Texas, they, they'd.
A
Give you the key to the.
B
City. Yeah. And as they.
C
Should. My property is worth more than your.
B
Life. Yeah. Yeah. Well, why did you look at me when you said.
D
That? Like, what did I.
A
Do? My thing has always been like, no.
B
My. Like.
A
Is. Is my. Your property worth more than my life? Like, my property is worth more than the life of anyone that would be willing to break into my home and take my property and potentially harm me and my family just to get my shit. In that case, if you're willing to do that, dude, a whopper is worth more than your life.
D
Yeah. There was a UK police officer or somebody in charge that just had this.
C
Statement. Oh.
D
Canada. Canada is the one that's.
C
Fucking. The chief of police from.
D
Canada. What'd they say? This is fucking.
C
Wild. He was like, you should comply with home.
D
Invaders. That was his actual statement, is comply. If.
A
Somebody. Your best course of action is to.
B
Comply. That's.
D
Right. Somebody broke into your house.
B
Comply. It's great news for home.
A
Invaders. You're doing great. You're doing great.
D
Honey. It's almost. Yeah, like, crime cuck here, my.
C
Superpower comedian, he made a little thing where he's like, oh, yeah, here's all my things. Here's all my stuff. My Rolex is right here. My kids are upstairs, and then my wife's in the back. So you just let me know what you need. Here's a soda. Here's a. Here's. Here's some tea if you need.
D
Anything. Oh, here it is. Litter okay?
A
Yeah. You look parched. Would you like some.
C
Gatorade?
B
Yeah. Do you need.
D
Anything? Just hide and comply. This is the police chief, the regional police chief, Jim.
B
McSween. And that's what they sign.
D
Publicly. That's what's.
B
Scary. So what are they.
C
Saying? It was a news press when he said that. He said, just comply with the home.
B
Invaders. That's.
C
Madness. That's.
A
Insane. How can you say you have rule of law in your country if you can't even defend what you. Your.
B
Domicile. So you work so hard for it, you pay tax on it, and then someone can just walk in. They'll get arrested, they'll go to jail. Sure.
C
Maybe. But then we switched to Florida sheriffs who are like, someone comes in your house, just kill him. We don't have a problem with that. Just fucking kill.
B
Him. Someone walk past your front door, you shoot them. Yeah, fucking kill.
A
Them. These gang stalkers keep showing up in these brown UPS uniforms. I've got six in the.
C
Backyard. It says Amazon. I think it means.
A
Something. Different and then like you have to worry about that with the whole thing where if we had laws like that here in the US because I made that joke now they have probable cause to search my backyard because you know, comedy's not.
B
Protected. Yeah mate. I don't know. I don't know enough about the inner workings of America and what happens with you guys when it comes to, you know, what the average person thinks because we're told this from our perspective that most Americans are pretty left leaning. And I don't. Going off the last election I'd say that's probably not.
A
True. Yeah, it's true in the cities. It's true in like pretty much all the big cities will be more left.
B
Leaning. But if you go out to the same everywhere really.
A
Yeah. I think most places I maybe have gone into like my thoughts on that. But in the real America, like in rural America like it's a completely different story where people actually are connected to where their food comes from or.
B
They work difficultly every.
A
Day.
B
Yeah. Work with their hands people and.
C
They want to protect their, their people and they want to protect their.
B
Property.
A
Yeah. Where shit didn't come easy. You have a lot more.
B
Right. Sure. Yeah. Because they're in the. This is the whole thing with the real world and this is the problem with the Gen Z kids coming through. Like they're not there. They're not in that real world and they're gonna vote in a very progressive way I think. And I think that's where you're gonna see these sort of far left leaning governments come through in the next 20 years when they're these kids out of college, out of university who are just mind like brainwashed and their minds have been wiped with any. Without. Without any. They don't. They are unable to critically think in a way that we would look at and go okay, that's a sort of well balanced individual. They're not, they're not there. They haven't grown up.
A
Enough. I think there's people that are breaking that mold though. There's a lot of people in that Gen Z, Gen Alpha I guess is the new one that like that are starting to really. It's swinging back around pretty.
B
Hardcore.
D
Yeah. I think you're just gonna see that repeating pattern but it's unfortunately just gonna.
B
Get. Yeah, well I know they're in.
A
Further. The death wobble gets.
D
Wider. Yeah, exactly. That's the best way.
A
To. Yeah.
D
Yeah. The death wobble is just.
A
Getting. I'm curious. In Australia do you guys have like. I know here in the United States, we have the First Amendment. It's literally the first one in the Bill of Rights. Protects freedom of speech, freedom of assembly, freedom of religious association, stuff like that. Do you guys have anything in your founding documents that's supposed to kind of hold that.
B
Banner? So in our Constitution, we have implied freedom of speech, whatever the fuck that means. No one knows. No one talks about it. No one.
D
Mentions. That's what it's written.
B
Down. Most people don't know we have a.
D
Constitution. No, I learned that.
B
Today. You know all that type of shit, or at least the founding documents. We. No one knows about that type of stuff. Americans tend to talk about it a lot. We never do. I've made a lot of videos on free speech in Australia, and I get this comment constantly. They're like, we don't even have. It's not. We have implied it's not real. It's like, that's the point. It should be real. We should have a referendum, which we have to have to change the Constitution on this. It should be in there every single. Like, there was this dude, right? He killed two cops and he's on the run currently. It's sort of like this. Not really a Ned Kelly thing because he's like some madman. Anyway, whatever. He killed these.
A
Cops.
B
Horrible. They're just there executing a search warrant or arrest warrant, all right? They're just normal human beings. Go and do their job and they've died. Terrible. But all these people. This one guy had at this rally had this poster up of this guy being a hero, right? And he gets arrested. The guy holding the poster.
A
Up. See, I don't like that.
B
Either. Of course. Why are you getting a. Hang.
A
On.
B
What? What? Because you like someone. He could say the most heinous shit ever. He could do the most horrible things ever. And you should be allowed to support him.
A
Regardless. You could hold up a poster that says, you know, Ted Bundy did nothing wrong. Yeah, like, that's okay. That's a fucking horrible.
B
Opinion.
A
Sure. But you should be allowed to have it, of course. Like, as long as you're not hurting anybody. Or again, like, literally advocating, like, we should do X, Y and.
B
Z. Like, yeah, on this date, let's do this. Like, yeah, yeah. Either everything's okay or nothing is okay. Except for, you know, screaming fire and crowded whatever, that type of shit. You know, when you sing in circumstances. Yeah, yeah. So that is the state that. That my country is in currently. And so as a comedian, I have to then look at that and go, well, she. What am I allowed to do here what is okay, what's not okay. And that's a strange place to be in because you shouldn't be in that position at all. You should be able to just fuck. Go, go. Hammer and tong. To use an Australian expression, go for.
D
It. But I know there was even American.
B
Comedy. There's a beer called hammer and tongs in.
A
Australia.
D
Really?
B
Yeah. I don't know if it's any good, but it's.
D
There.
B
Brandon.
D
Brandon.
B
Cody. Colin. The world. One word win.
A
AK50. I sense the disturbance in the force. What's.
D
Up? How do you like those Turtle beach noise canceling headphones? They're the Stealth.
A
700. They're fantastic. The noise canceling is so good. All I hear is.
D
Tinnitus. Ah, God, these are.
A
Comfortable. They're really.
D
Comfy. Yeah, those are.
A
Dope. Turtle beach makes them range Ear.
D
Pro. You want junior? Actually, Cody actually like put those.
B
On.
D
Oh, dude, those are legit comfortable Turtle Beach. What you doing over there, girl? You making some hot ass.
C
Stuff? I like your Squishies 3D spatial audio to improve your gaming. That would work really good in Tarkov. Hear people's.
D
Footsteps. And in.
A
Pubg. I can't wait to use a Turtle beach headset to listen for footsteps in Tarkov. Running the new AK50 while I get still killed from a wood.
B
Line. I can't see.
A
What. Eli, There's a global cabal that's working behind the scenes to control all media banking. And that's why we should have never gone off the gold.
C
Standard. Hey, hold on, hold on. 80 hour battery.
A
Life. 80 hour battery.
D
Life. Holy sh T. There's a lot of switches. Can't stress enough how comfortable these are. And if you've been in a long gaming session, which I'm sure all.
B
Of us have, unfortunately I wear adult.
C
Diapers when I play World of.
A
Warcraft. You should be euthanized.
D
Ha. Also controls headphones. Great. This game hard head to Turtle.
A
Beach and use code unsub for 10% off your entire.
D
Order. That's 10% off your entire order. @turtlebeach.com with using code Unsub after.
C
Your purchase they'll ask you where you heard about them. Please support unsub and tell them where you got.
D
Them. Tell them Unsub. Since there we go, it's American comedy. They had that same For a little bit, comedians were worried about getting in trouble so they'd restrict where they toured. They're like, yeah, just stay away from.
B
Colleges.
A
Yeah. Was it Chris Rock that said.
C
That? Like I.
A
Won't. I won't go to colleges.
D
Anymore. Him, there was a.
C
Handful. Yeah. I think Chappelle says something about.
A
The. Yeah, Bill Burr, too, I.
D
Think. Yeah, they're just like, fuck.
A
This. And these are guys that are, like, left leaning in general, too, but they're just like, guys, this is gone too.
D
Far. Yeah, I'm gonna make somebody mad, sad, offended. And now I'm going to be the target of an online attack because X, Y and Z. And you're like, dude, like, go fuck.
B
Yourself. Yeah.
D
100%. Is that why you're doing your tour? Does that help when you land here and you're doing a tour.
B
Here? Well, the big thing about touring in America is I was. I wanted to do it last year. I wanted to do the year before. But getting a visa is so ridiculous to work here. Like, I should have gone over the border. That would have been signed.
A
By. You would have gotten. You would have gotten a free cell.
B
Phone. Exactly. Like Common and New.
D
York. Really good vlog material. You smuggling your family across the.
A
Line. Show and show and Dave are from Ireland, where I said, like, yeah, you should just. It would have been way easier if you. Just because you came over during the Biden administration. You guys would have gotten so much shit. Just pretend you don't speak.
B
English. Yeah. Straight in. I had to hire bloody immigration. It was ridiculous. So mad. And just to work, just to do some shows here. Like, it's.
D
Not. That's what's wild. Just to do a few shows. Like, whoa.
A
Buddy. And is it because you're working and not.
B
Visiting? Yeah.
A
Yeah. To get.
B
It. Like, there's a visa called an esta that you just basically go, hey. It asks you, are you. Have you ever planned a terrorist act or committed a terrorist.
A
Act?
B
No. You just go, no. And they're like, okay.
A
You. Can you say it like you actually.
B
Have. Well, I've never. No plan. I.
D
Just. Like, it's the yes or no. It's like, yeah, it's a.
C
Team. Planning is one thing. Execution is.
B
Another. Yeah, we've all had.
A
Thoughts. All right, now you're making fun of this, Eli, but the average IQ of the people that you've encountered in.
D
Combat. Oh, that is very true. I just picture. It's like, well, yeah, somebody.
B
Actually. And then they're like, woop.
D
Woop. How'd you catch me? Yeah, but if.
B
You. The question before that is, none.
C
Of us know how to cause a mascot casualty.
B
Incident. No, you know how, like, if you. If you do have to, like, check boxes in like a Form, like, if you check one box, it like, blanks all the other boxes out. Yeah, yeah. Like, when I checked. Wyatt, they shouldn't ask me that. Like, I should be like, yeah, come on, bro, it's all.
C
Good. Tell me about.
A
It. Come.
B
On. You're not gonna do that. But, yeah, no. Piece of shit. It's. It's. Yeah, it's weird to try and get into this country, but. And then questions. They look at you like you're a.
C
Criminal.
B
Okay. It's like. Well, the people on. But I will say the history.
A
Of that island is, you know, it's not a good.
B
Place. Well, a lot of people. There were convicts taken there. And then a lot of people decided to get on a boat for like a nine months and go there with their families to a place they knew nothing about. That's how insane it must have been in.
D
The. And all these creatures try to kill you. It's.
B
Dope.
D
Yeah. Would you like to start a family.
A
Here? Somebody had that picture. It was the queen going through like, basically like a customs checkpoint point. And it was like, Australian Customs. It's like, excuse me, ma', am, do you have a criminal record? She goes, no, do I still need.
D
One? That's great.
A
Yeah. She's a shitty little Australian joke.
B
There. When she died, a few. I know. I was sad when she died. I don't know why. I just was. I don't give a. About the monarchy. I think history's cool and stuff, but I was like, when she was just a little nana, I was a bit.
D
Sad. That was your thing. It's like, man, that one hit it, did it.
B
Did. She died off. No, that's causing.
C
Anyone. But the government taught you to be.
B
Sad. That's brother. That's right. I've been caught up in the psy. Up of her being dead. Bring it back, I say, I bet they did. I bet they did. Well, she was. Yeah. The British crown is a tyrannical ruler over the.
A
Irish. I got for that in that IRA video. I did a video on.
B
The. God, what was.
A
It? AR180. It was used a lot during the incident between the Irish and the British. Big in the ira. And there's a clip of me in that video of me just like smoking a cigarette. You really think the Queen died of natural causes? And it like, it hit newspapers and shit and like, really, really. I can't even make a fucking joke in an intro to, like, yes, I killed the queen. Like, what the.
C
Do? You can't be a.
A
Comedian. You can't be like, it's very clearly comedy. But they're congressional candidate. If I see one more headline.
C
That says congressional candidate, I. Yeah, you also hate.
B
Veterans. Oh, apparently.
A
Yeah. Despite.
C
Them. Have you heard about him hating.
B
Veterans? Well, I also hate veterans. So let's talk.
A
About. Well, it's like, despite them exclusively being who I hang out with, raise my money for all sorts of. Like this, it's like disingenuous political attacks, and it drives me.
B
Crazy. Yeah, but that's what they'll do. That's what they'll continue to do. And the further you go down that path, it'll just. More skeletons will come out of the closet. Ted Bundy, lover and, you know, all that type.
A
Of. And Tony, to borrow his word, if you continue to attack me on that and pretend like you actually believe it, you're.
B
A. Such a strange way Americans say the word. It's just.
A
Just. No, it's. It's like for whatever reason, YouTube treats dead. They treat it like. Like the hard R. Oh, yeah. In. In YouTube or like in. In the guidelines. Anyway, like, Americans can't.
C
Say. They let Aussie channel say it though.
B
Right? Yeah, I say I can. Oh, sometimes I used to be able to say it. Now I have to cut it.
A
Out. The real question is, can he say it on our.
D
Channel? No, he tested.
A
It.
D
Really? Okay. Yeah, I.
B
Forget. Oh, no, we were talking about then word. Oh.
D
Well. Yeah, you can say that.
B
One.
A
No, I think he found the.
C
Line. I thought you were cool.
B
Man. Made all these red lights on these cameras mean. You cannot say that. So that's why when you said hard R in Australia, I always thought the hard R.
A
Was. No, say that was the Linus Tech tips. Did you see that? You didn't see that? No. Linus Tech Tips. He was on a podcast and like, he was.
D
Just. This is live. That's why his co host was freaking.
C
Out. Life is different.
A
Than. Well, because he goes like, oh, well, you know, we all used to say the hard R. Like, I remember in high school, like, that was just something we said. And his co host is like.
D
What?
A
You. You what? And it took him a while to figure.
B
Out. He's.
A
Like. He's like, yeah, you mean like the N word? He's like, oh, God, no. Like, we wouldn't say that. And he's like, oh, thank.
D
God. He's like, what's the hard R mean? He's like, brother. Wait, the hard R is for the N word. He's like, oh. Oh, no, I did not say that in high school. Oh, yeah. 100%. Never made those.
A
Jokes. He said it all the.
C
Time. He was talking about retard the entire.
B
Time.
A
Yeah. Cause, like, his co host is just sitting there like. Like, brother, you could not have waterboarded this out of me. Like, what the fuck are you talking.
B
About? The. The. That. That's what I thought it was too, until I think, you know, only a couple of years ago when I heard someone, you know, reference it like that, and I was like, oh, shit. No, that's not what I thought that.
D
Was. That's a different.
B
Word. That's a very different word. But, yeah, you hear like, I don't hate retards. I don't blame retards for everything. I do. Yeah, no, it's. It's not nice to say words, but yeah.
D
It'S. God, it's.
B
So. That's like social policing of words. Like, it's not cool to say that in an angry way, I guess. Everyone says they don't say it, but they. I say it when I.
C
Come. Dude, I've.
D
Had. What, a first.
C
Date?
B
Yeah. Oh, yeah. On a bedroom window, from the.
C
Outside. I've had black people scream the angriest words ever in my face against, like, a white dude. And I just laughed the entire.
B
Time.
D
Oh. So your first show, does it start tomorrow at.
B
Friday? I'm at the. The Vulcan in Austin, and then I'm heading over a minute, then. Yeah. Yes. I'm here in Texas for the next 10 days, and then I'm heading over to beautiful Los Angeles to do the Hollywood improv, and then over to gorgeous New York City to. I'm sort of just testing where I can and can't sell tickets. I don't. I don't know. Also, with a. With a toddler, it's hard to travel for a long period of time, too. So we're over here for the next three or four weeks and heading back home to get into Christmas and whatnot. And then probably I've got a special that I'm releasing, talking to some streamers at the moment, but see, if the. If the. If they come to me with a deal. If not, we'll just put it out on.
A
YouTube. Thanks.
C
Man. Fuck.
D
You. How many live shows are you.
B
Doing? I'm doing three. Three in America, which I know is all, but this is the first. This is sort of testing the waters to see how we're going. We're selling.
D
Tours. Terrifying, isn't it?
B
Yeah. A different country, man. Like in Australia this year or last year, and this year, because it was. That was the time of the tour, it started last year, ended this year. There was like 40 shows. So that's where I obviously want to get to with America. Australia has 40 shows? Yeah. In a year. Well, the most I ever did was 92 in six different countries. So that was, that was a lot.
D
Off. We do. We're doing eight this year and.
B
We'Re like, yeah, it's hard work, man. It's. Dude, it's. It's a lot. And so what I've been doing over the last. Since Atticus was born, my son, he external best.
D
Name. I love.
B
It. He's gonna.
D
Fucking. He's a watch.
B
Gladiator. He is. He is. He's got long hair too. So he's the man. He. He finds farts funny too, which is hilarious. Like, I'll just wake up in the morning, make a coffee, and I'll drop me guts. As we say in Australia, drop me.
C
Guts. I call it on your.
D
Side. But babe, I'm gonna drop them.
B
Guts. Like two girls, one. One coffee. And so I'll fart in the kitchen and he'll laugh. It's great. It's.
A
Fantastic. He's gonna grab some of this early.
B
On. He knows, and he goes, that's hilarious. But when. When he was.
A
Born. Hell yeah. Little.
B
Man. Sorry. His mother and myself, we started, you know, dating back in the day, what, 10 years, 11 years ago, 12 years ago now, whatever it is. She had to work while I was on the road and she was working these shit jobs. And I always said, regardless of what our family life is like, once I make money, we go everywhere together. And that's why we do that. So when he was born and I was touring, he would only go to sleep for me. Like today, you'd only go to sleep for me. So I shush him off, lay down with him, put him to bed, and then we wake up and I go straight. Well, I get up and go straight on stage. So that was like my warm up. So a lot of people doing shots, they're firing up. Mine was shot in a dark room. And then walk up, boom, straight on.
C
Stage. And then you farted on.
B
Him. And then I farted on him. That was how it was.
A
Done. That's my first.
B
Joke. And so that's. That was sort of how that all changed for.
D
Me. But it was.
B
Good. It gave me something to do before shows rather than just walking around. But at least you guys with your live shows, there's a group of.
D
You.
B
Yes. Yeah, for me, it's just usually just Ben and Myself sitting in a random fucking backstage.
D
Area. Random green.
B
Room. Random green room somewhere in the.
D
World. That'd be terrible. Terrifying doing it out. I don't know. How long is your.
B
Set?
A
Ow. Oh.
D
My. By yourself, dog. Like, we have five, six people on that stage and then we're interacting with the audience and then we're having like people. We have people in the audience that will come up and interact. So it's like boom, boom.
B
Boom. Oh, man, I, I do an hour and then I'm out of.
D
There. Oh, this is. Oh, hour 15. And then. Yeah, talk to people, interact and then it's out. Because it is. I mean, you know, on top.
A
Of like VIP and everything like.
D
That. Like, it's.
B
Exhausting. Yeah, it's. It is, it is tired. I love it. I'm very lucky to do what I.
A
Do.
B
Sure.
A
Absolutely.
B
It's. It's. I, I did a shitty job and I think that was the most important thing that I did for when I was younger was work jobs, you know, where.
A
You. We've all definitely worked those shit.
B
Jobs. If you don't do that, you don't know what you got, you know, you got no idea. There's a lot of young guys that I know that are in the TikTok game and they've never had a normal job and they have no idea. They don't know what's going to happen. They're not working hard. And.
D
I. No. Customer service is wild not to experience that once in your life because that's a reality check working like, hey, being a server, military police officer, that is that reality check of how humans are on a day to day.
B
Level. Yeah, I mean, I, I did landscaping, I installed shower screens. All these shitty jobs. You're white and I know I'm not even Mexican and so how do I, how do I even know that reference? I don't know any Mexicans and I'm not from.
A
Here. I'm just saying all the Mexicans work at the.
D
Bank. I did.
B
This. I was like the Jewish Mexicans. But yeah, I actually, you know.
A
What, it's called the callback.
B
Joke. In LA the other day, everyone ignored this. All the black people, all the white people. The only people that talked to us were Mexicans. We were walking to the shops and they were really.
D
Nice. Oh yeah, I.
C
Do. Mexicans are the.
B
Nicest. And I was, I was. Not that I, I didn't have any sort of preconceived notions about.
A
Mexicans. I.
B
Love. You just threw your wallet. I just love burritos and Shit.
D
Yeah. Mexicans, they love.
B
Burritos. Mince meat is awesome. I don't know if Mexicans invented mince meat, but. Big.
A
Fan. Oh, took me a.
B
Minute. I'm like, no, not the mints that you.
C
Eat.
B
Chorizo. Chorizo, yes.
D
Snags. Yeah.
C
That'S. That's the Mexican minced.
D
Meat. I've never heard of a snag.
A
Sausage. I love it when Cody tries to say Mexican words. It's like my small joys in.
C
Life I'm trying to get used to. So I have a Mexican fiance right now. Yeah, dude. Her mom is the nicest person ever. Doesn't speak English.
A
Whatsoever. Oh.
C
Really? But she'll bring me to my.
A
Lace.
C
Yeah. And.
B
It'S. Shut.
A
Up. No, that's fine. That one's all right. This morning that I was just.
C
Like. Oh, when I was trying to get. Oh, what were you trying to eat this.
B
Morning? Chil Chil. Oh, it's.
A
Beautiful. That's pretty decent. Yeah, it was that, but just you. I don't know. I don't know how you pronounced it, but it was so.
C
Funny. I probably said.
A
Chilaquiles. No, no, even that would have been preferable to whatever the you.
C
Said. Chaya Kaylor. I'm just trying to get them Chaya kay feelers right.
D
Now. Can you roll your.
C
Rs? No, I.
A
Can'T. Yeah, see, that's that. I think that's what it.
C
Is. I've never.
A
Been. Whatever noise you make instead of rolling the R's, like, I don't. I find it as peak.
C
Comedy. I'm trying my.
B
Best. So dumb darn it. I used to work in a bar and you hear Australians pronounce French wine like, get, mate, get a glass of that mawit Chardonnay. Savio bloke. I'll get you a savio bloke. Have a go at.
D
That. What's your big show in America, this.
B
Tour? The biggest. They're all about the same. They're all like medium sized rooms. So it's that.
D
Good. Especially it's a good.
B
Start. It's a start, man. And I'm not sort of trying to big dick myself here. I'm an absolute nobody when it comes to America. And it's just starting from the. Starting from the bottom and trying to make my way somewhere. So that's. That's all I'm doing.
A
Here. What's a medium sized.
B
Room? 200 or something. Okay, yeah. So not. Not crazy, not tiny, not ridiculous, but they're good. They're good.
D
Enough. And that's terrifying for people. Like 200 people say when you look out, especially when you're just in a new place.
B
That'S. Especially by yourself, you don't know if they're gonna work. They're jokes. I have no idea. Because there's. I've done shows in the uk, in Scotland, in Ireland, in Northern Ireland and New Zealand, but never. They're all very similar places. Never in. I've done shows in New York, though, before, so. And everything was sweet, so it'll be.
A
Fine. La, you were talking about that earlier. Like, that's the one place that, like, landing for the first time. When I. First time I visited la, dude, years and years ago, I can't remember when it was, but I remember looking out the window and my thought was, because you see that haze over the land and it's just like grid as far as the eye can.
B
See. It's.
A
Confronting. I just thought, like, this place looks like the earth has.
B
Cancer. If you didn't grow up here and you came in from Australia and you saw LA first, you would assume that that's all of America. And I will talk about this in the car. Like, it just seems like it's so yellow and gross. And if this is your only experience of America, then you've probably missed out on a.
C
Lot. I can feel that. Because there's a lot of crime there. Like you said, the homelessness is like super bad.
B
There. And like the Hollywood Walk of Fame, everyone goes there and it's just cracked out. Crackheads cracking.
A
Everywhere. It's right there's. On the street. People are rude.
C
As.
B
Bro. I.
C
Took. We were. We were doing that. That screening for that movie we went to a couple of years ago, and I, I took my son. He was probably 14, 13 at the time. I took him up there because I was like, hey, I want you to experience the Walk of Fame. We're walking down the Walk of Fame. And I'm like, hey, Killer's.
A
Game. That's what it was, I.
C
Think. Yeah, it was killer's game. And I was like, like, ah, dodge that, dodge that. Because it's on the. The stars on.
B
The. Oh, this.
C
Dog. I'm like, john, John. I'm like grabbing my.
B
Son. John.
C
Yeah. I'm like, watch out, watch out. No, don't step that way. Don't step that.
B
Way. I saw a. With muesli in it. You what? Do you know what muesli is? Like, like, what's like.
D
Granola? Oh, just poop with.
B
Granola. Granola in it. So either someone was feeding their dog granola or a human had.
D
Shat. 100%. A human had.
B
Shat. Yeah.
C
Obviously. There was heroin shits everywhere. The heroin shits are always the.
B
Puddles. It's a lot of.
C
Black. It's like that greasy black.
B
Shit. Not that I say color.
C
But. And it's.
B
Watery.
C
Yeah. So I was like having to grab my son and move him past the heroin shits on the walking thing you're giving.
D
Me. Oh, I forgot. Because I took right into New York this year to go, hey, let's go. Just his autism is like, daddy, I must go see these exact.
C
Buildings. So he had to see the tall.
D
Buildings. Yes. To a T of where we're going first. And did it all in one day. But still terrifying of walking, riding around because he has his phone. I'm like, oh, I have to watch out if anyone's going to grab his phone. Oh, I want to run a subway. And I don't have my gun at that. Like in New York. Very.
A
Hard.
D
Coward. I.
A
Should. No, like, no, legally. It's very. No, like those blue. Blue cities and states. Very hard, even for. For.
B
Us. Like.
A
Yeah. It's just not a thing.
C
That. Yeah, I never carried in.
A
La. I never carried in.
D
La. And then when you go on the subways, you're very much. Next level of hyper vigilance kicked in. Like, Bryden's taking his videos. I'm like, oh, I am super.
A
Uncomfortable.
B
Right. We had a couple that I think were like, Eastern Europe or something. Some funny language. And they were there. They were white, so I can say that. And on the subway in New York, and these kids had gotten onto the subway sound system, and they kept saying this phrase over and over again. And this couple ran off the train with their family, but we.
A
Sat. What was the.
B
Phrase? His kids were going, fuck it right in the. And all the Americans are just sitting there like, okay. And we were just like, whatever. But these poor European people were like, oh, my.
D
God. Terrorists. Yeah. They're not used to.
A
Running. It was like, I don't know.
D
Dude. A Japanese person hopping on a US Subway system would be the most terrifying thing. If they go from Japan on how their subway system works in their train system, it is organized, it is quiet, it is peaceful, it is on time. No one talks. You're not allowed to.
B
Talk.
A
Yeah. The island. You don't get assaulted by a Michael Jackson.
D
Impersonation. Exactly.
A
Dude. You.
D
Don'T. You cannot talk on your.
B
Phone. Have you seen those videos of dudes coming on women on the Japanese.
D
Subways.
A
Huh. I think that's.
D
Called. Well, yeah, that's a very specific Google search. You can't just put crime at the end.
A
Of. How does one organically come across.
B
This? He's like, son.
A
Shit. Straight up, though, like, for the people that, that are from foreign countries that come here and they, they try to visit the United States and they only go to LA and New York, they're like, man, I hate it here. I'm like, honestly, I get it. Like, that's not. Well, because that's most people's understanding of like most.
C
Foreigners. It sucks too, because those are the big, the biggest international.
B
Airports.
C
Yeah. And that's all they see in movies, like Hollywood movies, New York, Los.
A
Angeles. I don't like going to those.
C
Places. Yeah, I fucking. Dude, you'd have to pay me so much money to go to Los Angeles, like.
A
To. Oh.
D
God. For.
B
Vacation.
D
Yeah. Actually talking out loud, it was not the best place to go on a.
A
Vacation. No, I know they're like maybe once a year or something like that, but I mean, like, it's not for.
C
Fun. And I know you took riding there because he. He wanted the buildings. He wanted those specific buildings to do. And you, you were a good father figure in that situation. But like, if you're coming from a foreign country.
D
Man. Man, Dude, I'd be like.
C
Ryden. Try to. Try to find a rural American town, just like experience.
A
Americana. It's like if you, you come here thinking like, oh, all of America is New York or LA, it's like, dude, that's less than.
B
1%. It's the same with Sydney and Melbourne in Australia. They're shitholes. Like terrible places. Like not crime or anything like that. Just like dull and gross and concrete. And then you go out into like, like brutal. Not even just the. Not even just the bush, but like just normal place. It's like where I live in Newcastle, it's all just beach, you know, it's beautiful. It's like we're in Hawaii and these amazing sunsets, but then we go.
D
Home. Like, same.
B
Thing. It's the same thing.
A
Man. Like, we're same sun.
B
Allegedly. But yeah, it's. It's. You go to these cities and we're just not made to look live in cities. Like, we're not meant to be that close. We're supposed to have small knit groups, tribes, that type of stuff. Like, what's that number? The. The amount of people you can have like 100 or something like something people that you can have a close personal relationship with. It's a certain. It's a. It's got someone's name and then number. That's the person who, you know, figured it out or whatever that you can have a close personal relationship with. Not these hundreds of people you run into every.
D
Day. It's the. Was the rat.
A
Experiment. Yeah, that's what I was referring to. It wasn't the. You might be thinking, or you might be talking about something different, but that was what I was.
D
Thinking. That one's great. You get to see the fallen collapse or the rise in the collapse of a society through rats. And they did it multiple times. And it was like, hey, we will give these mice or rats everything they need. They live in a utopia. So they have food, they have everything. Then it found out. It's like, oh, they don't have any stimulation because everything is.
C
Given. They couldn't stand it.
D
Right. So they would breed. And then the alphas took over. And then the other. Then the alphas got bored of having sex, so they stopped. And the prettiest ones went and just fornicated with males. And you would have multiple times rise up, and then all the rest would.
A
Die. When people have no problems in society to actually solve, they become.
D
Gay. You read that, dude, it is wild. The. The. The underrat. Like the beta rats, they all started fighting and they stopped trying to even. Even approach females. The females would only talk to the beautiful rats. The alphas. Alphas then were like, no, we don't even like that off. Well, we're gonna be pretty over here. They die off. The females are gonna die off. And then all the rats would literally die off. There's.
C
The. What's the saying? Hard times. Hard men. Something like.
A
That. Hard times and hard.
B
Men.
A
Yeah. Hard times create soft men. Soft men create hard.
D
Times. Richery.
C
People. Crazy. That's.
D
Wild.
A
Experiment. No, but it's the like. Was it Dostoevsky talking about, like, if. If you're, you know, in this perfect.
B
Heaven. Is he a Texan?
A
Dostoevsky? I don't believe so. I believe that was a Russian man, a very Russian.
B
Man.
A
Dostoevsky. But talking about, like, if you had a perfect heaven where, like, all you have to do is eat bread and procreate like you can't fucking handle.
B
It. But that's why retirement kills people. Yeah.
D
Right.
B
Yeah. Oh.
A
Yeah. 100% the.
B
Course. I like the.
D
Shirt. Jesus. Dude, that. I know. That's a.
C
Helmet. He's got a hockey flow on.
B
Him. He's got a.
D
What? A hockey.
C
Flow. I like the hockey flow. I.
B
Thought. Hey, you can come here. Hey.
C
Baby. Look at that.
D
Hair. Dude, it's.
B
Brandon. Adi's just had a big.
A
Nap. I. I respect the.
B
Sweetheart. Well, thank you, gentlemen. It's been a.
A
Pleasure.
D
Brother. Where do we find you? Or where can the Internet find.
B
You? Instagram @thebutzman. Isaac Butterfield on YouTube, and that's pretty much about it. But come and see me live if next time I'm back here or whenever this comes.
A
Out. Absolutely.
B
Man. But I'll be back in 2026, I'm sure. And so on and so forth. So thank you, gentlemen, for your time. I appreciate your time and your efforts. But now the Kuss has reclaimed his.
D
Father. We can tell Cody. Close us out, you beautiful son of a.
C
Bitch. Guys, thank you for coming to the Unsubscribe podcast. I was joined today by Eli Double Tap, Isaac Butterfield, Brandon Herrera, myself, donut operator. We really appreciate.
A
Y'.
D
All. Thank you all.
A
Kisses. You know my.
D
Name. A new phone for.
B
Billy. A necklace for.
D
Sam. All the while on the lookout for scams. A swipe here and tap there. Better make it go.
A
Far. Turns out mom didn't know she.
B
Needs a new car this year. Stay on top of your credit with the Myfico app. Get your FICO score straight from the people that created it. Plus free credit monitoring and a free credit report every month. No credit card required. So make holiday spending one less stress under the mistletoe. Visit myfico.com free or download the MyFico app.
Date: December 15, 2025
Host(s): UnsubscribePodcast (Eli Doubletap, Brandon Herrera, Donut Operator, The Fat Electrician)
Special Guest: Isaac Butterfield
Theme: An irreverent, wide-ranging conversation on Australian culture, guns, comedy, COVID, and the legendary Australian outlaw Ned Kelly.
This episode dives into the wild contrasts between Australia and the USA—covering everything from gun laws, comedy censorship, and freedom of speech, to the infamous story of Ned Kelly. Guest Isaac Butterfield, an Australian comedian, brings his unfiltered perspective and shares personal stories of controversy, touring, and the state of liberty Down Under. The group ranges from hilarious tales of haunted dolls and drugs in sports, to serious reflections on COVID restrictions, crime, and the struggles comedians face with cancel culture.
Australia's Restrictive Gun Laws
Cultural Attitudes: Individualism vs. Collectivism
A Day in the Life: Cop Stories
Turning Conservative with Age
Segment Begins: [53:22]
Introduction & Cultural Placement
The Outlaw Story
Folk Hero or Criminal?
Australia’s Censorship Problem
In Practice
Reflections and Warnings
The American Castle Doctrine vs. Australian Law
Segment Begins: [82:14]
Cities as Poor First Impressions
On Tribalism & Urban Dysfunction
Isaac on gun restrictions:
“You have to have a reason. Why do you want a gun? I like guns. They're fun to shoot.” (06:26)
On cancel culture:
"I've been cancelled five times...," “If you can't stand the heat, stay out of the oven. That's all I said, right?” (63:41)
On Ned Kelly’s armor:
“He built a metal suit to have a shootout with the cops.” (54:37)
“He’s like Iron Man... with a box of scraps.” (56:56)
On Australia’s fake sense of freedom: "They feel like they're free, but they're really not." (07:31)
Unsubscribe Podcast Ep 243 is a hilarious, uncensored, and insightful look at cultural differences, government overreach, and the enduring appeal of outlaw legends like Ned Kelly. It’s part travelogue, part cautionary tale about censorship and freedom, with Isaac Butterfield’s stories making the Australian perspective vivid and relatable. The podcast is rich in personality, dark humor, and sometimes biting social commentary—always wrapped in banter and memorable one-liners.