HTDE: Earthquakes, Dentists, and How To Talk To Your Dog

Summary

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Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!

Episode: HTDE: Earthquakes, Dentists, and How To Talk To Your Dog
Date: October 15, 2025
Host: Peter Sagal & Wait Wait Producers Ian & Mike
Guest: Dr. Danielle Giangrasso, Christina Hunger, Dr. Theresa Neal, Paola, and listeners

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Overview of the Episode

This week’s “How to Do Everything” special, featured within Wait Wait… Don’t Tell Me!, dives into a delightfully offbeat trio of topics: how rats are revolutionizing earthquake rescues, the perils (and potential solutions) of trying to communicate while in the dentist’s chair, and innovative ways to talk to your dog (and perhaps your dentist) with buttons à la canine speech boards. The episode is classic Wait Wait—witty, lighthearted, packed with real-world problem-solving, listener participation, and some surprisingly scientific insights.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Rescue Rats: Earthquake Search and Rescue

Segment Start: 00:56

• Introduction to Rescue Rats

  • Dr. Danielle Giangrasso describes how NGO APOPO is training "rescue rats" to locate survivors in earthquake rubble.
  • Rats are equipped with vests featuring a micro-switch, GPS, camera, two-way communication, and a beeping system.
  • When close to a human, the rat pulls the switch, sending a signal to the rescue team.

  Notable Quote:

  “So we’ve trained them to pull a micro switch on their vest whenever they are in proximity of a human... it triggers a beep back to our base camp.”
  — Dr. Danielle Giangrasso (01:43)

• The Human Side of Rescue Rats

  • The team considers the impact on survivors, acknowledging the initial terror of seeing a rat in such circumstances.
  • Features like orange vests and pre-recorded messages (“Hey, I’m a rescue rat. I’m here surveying. Please let me know if you need help.”) are designed to minimize panic.

  Memorable Moment:

  “A talking rat is here to save me. Well, cool.”
  — Mike (03:52)

• Importance of Rats in Debris Assessment

  • Beyond finding people, rats provide invaluable mapping of debris, aiding future searches.

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2. Dentists and Dental Communication Woes

Segment Start: 04:29

• Listener Question—Speaking While at the Dentist

  • Listener Dennis relates an awkward experience: his dentist debates politics mid-root canal.
  • The hosts consult Christina Hunger, speech therapist and creator of the dog-talk button system.

  Notable Quote:

  “What do you do when you’re in the dental chair and your dentist is carrying on a conversation with you, but has his hands in your mouth... that’s tough.”
  — Dennis (04:29)

• Augmentative Communication: Dog Buttons Meet the Dentist’s Office

  • Christina Hunger describes her method for communicating with her dog, Stella, using a paw-operated button board initially developed for nonverbal children.
  • The hosts speculate on repurposing this communication system for dental patients, creating pre-programmed responses like “Of course I’ve been flossing.”

  Notable Quote:

  “Our buttons and just this whole concept... could absolutely solve that universal problem...”
  — Christina Hunger (10:26)

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3. Live Dental Office Experiment

Segment Start: 11:37

• Testing the Button Board at the Dentist

  • Dr. Theresa Neal of Windy City Family Dental welcomes Mike and the communication device for an in-chair trial.
  • Exchange includes preset responses:
    • “Really, really good.”
    • “Every day.”
    • “Of course I’ve been flossing.”
    • “I love that for you.”
    • Even a whimsical Elizabeth Gilbert quote!

  Notable Quote:

  "As Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love said, having a broken heart is a good sign because it means you tried for something."
  — Button Board, quoting (14:19)

• Dentist’s Perspective on Communication

  • Dr. Neal admits dentists use a 'bite block' to end undesirable conversations, sometimes unnecessarily.
  • She’s ambivalent about the button device, preferring traditional signals like thumbs up/down.

  Memorable Insights:

  • Secret code word among staff: “triangle patient” means “high maintenance."
  • Staff uses fake phone calls to gracefully end chatty patient sessions (“You have a call in room 10,” in a non-existent room).

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4. Dog Buttons: More Than Basic Needs

Segment Start: 05:58

• Deeper Dog Conversations

  • Christina shares stories of Stella using the button board for more than needs—recently, Stella commented “mad want outside” while Christina was tending to her baby.
  • Stella recognizes emotions and uses conversational phrases like “play happy.”

  Notable Quote:

  “That’s been the most surprising part of this. When I set out to teach her... my goal was to just give her a way to say some few basic needs. But I saw her starting to use words in ways that were really similar to kids...”
  — Christina Hunger (08:46)

• Guest and Family Reactions

  • Visitors to Christina’s house are often stunned when Stella uses the board naturally (e.g., declaring “all done water” to guests’ astonishment).

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5. Wait Wait… Staff as Your Out-of-Office Contacts: The Paola Birthday Saga

Segment Start: 18:15

• Background

  • Paola used Ian & Mike as her out-of-office emergency contacts during her week-long birthday break, leaving all messages and logistics to them as a joke.

• Listener Messages

  • Ken and Eduardo (her brother) contact the show, unsure how to discover and celebrate Paola’s plans.

• Birthday Coordination and Surprise

  • The hosts work behind the scenes, send an edible arrangement to her (dark chocolate, lactose-free), and stage a birthday treasure hunt within the podcast episode itself.

  Heartfelt Birthday Message (24:34):

  “Feliciares e quiero mucho. Hope you’ve had a fantastic birthday... and love you very much and wish you the best.”
  — Eduardo

• Reunion with Paola

  • Paola joins the call, delighted but bemused by the elaborate birthday coordination.
  • She confesses to needing a break and trusting the hosts to “do absolutely nothing helpful” while filling in.

  Memorable Quote:

  “Of course I wanted to leave this with someone I could trust to do absolutely nothing helpful. And you two were, you know, the obvious choice.”
  — Paola (26:56)

  • The hosts also hide a “birthday treasure” in the episode to honor Paola’s childhood memories.

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Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• "A talking rat is here to save me. Well, cool."
  — Mike (03:52)

• "You may think you're hallucinating what's happening."
  — Dr. Danielle Giangrasso (03:13)

• "Of course I've been flossing."
  — Pre-programmed response on the button board (11:02, 13:54)

• “We have a device called a bite block… so they can’t really close, they can’t really stop and keep talking.”
  — Dr. Theresa Neal (12:32)

• “Triangle patient”
  — Code for high maintenance, Dr. Neal (16:33)

• "Really, really good." / “I love that for you.”
  — Button responses at the dentist (13:44–14:13)

• “Having a broken heart is a good sign because it means you tried for something.”
  — Quoted from Elizabeth Gilbert via the button board and again later in the show (14:19, 28:54)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• [00:56] — Earthquake rescue rats (Dr. Giangrasso)
• [04:29] — The dental conversation dilemma (Dennis’s question)
• [05:58] — How to talk to your dog (Christina Hunger, Stella)
• [11:37] — Testing the button board at the dentist (Dr. Neal)
• [18:15] — Paola’s birthday out-of-office saga
• [27:21] — Birthday treasure and wrap-up

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Tone and Style

The episode is playful, self-deprecating, and pragmatic, celebrating creative solutions to everyday annoyances while poking fun at the absurdity of life’s little obstacles. Both the hosts and guests embrace curiosity and gentle humor—especially regarding talking dogs, rats in disaster rescue, and the gentle negotiation of small-talk with someone’s hands in your mouth.

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In Summary

• Rescue rats may one day save you in a disaster (and, yes, may even talk—sort of).
• If your dentist tries to chat mid-root canal, perhaps button boards are the next big thing...or maybe just stick with thumbs up/down.
• Dogs like Stella can do more than ask for food—they want to share feelings and experiences just like us.
• Wait Wait’s hosts really will handle your out-of-office—a little. With the right sense of humor, your birthday can be crowd-sourced and commemorated with a hidden treasure in a podcast.
• Communication problems are universal, but creativity and humor help us all get through.

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Transcript

[Announcer]

This message comes from Natural Resources Defense Council. Join the supporters of NRDC who focus on safeguarding the earth, its people, plants and animals. For a limited time, contributions are being matched 5 to 1 nrdc.org Wait. Hey guys, it's Peter. Once again in your Wait Wait feed. I am so pleased to present to you another episode of how to Do Everything by Wait Wait producers Ian and Mike. On this week's show, they actually answer a question that we've all had but have had trouble articulating. Namely, how do you talk to the dentist when your mouth is filled with dentistry? Now remember, you can only get these episodes of how to Do Everything in our feed for a short while. So if you love the kind of mysteries that Mike and Ian are revealing, make sure you subscribe to how to Do Everything at their own feed. Thanks.

[Mike]

Whenever there's an earthquake, the search and rescue team's first priority is to find people who may be trapped under the rubble.

[Ian]

It's a very hard thing to do. Danielle Giangrasso of the NGO APOPO has been working on a new way to do it.

[Dr. Danielle Giangrasso]

So a major challenge that search and rescue teams face is the limited ability to penetrate deep into dense and complex debris structures to find victims. And so our solution is to work with rats, or as we call them, rescue rats. You can actually go in and navigate these tight spaces that other technologies can't reach and also locate and identify human survivors.

[Various Listeners/Guests]

Wow.

[Mike]

How do the rats tell you that? How do they give you that information?

[Various Listeners/Guests]

Yes.

[Dr. Danielle Giangrasso]

So we've trained them to pull a micro switch on their vest whenever they are in proximity of a human and they pull a micro switch and it triggers a beep back to our base point, our base camp, that they've found someone.

[Ian]

Okay, so I should be picturing these rats wearing vests.

[Christina Hunger]

Yes.

[Dr. Danielle Giangrasso]

Also, they're outfitted with a technology enabled backpack, with a camera, with two way communications gps.

[Ian]

So what happens? Okay, so there's an earthquake. Say there's an area with a lot of debris where you suspect there might be people trapped underneath it, and then you show up with a bunch of rats.

[Dr. Danielle Giangrasso]

Yes. When we've identified an area of the debris that we would like to search with, the rats will then set up our small team and the rats will go in and search whether it's there's a supposed victim deep in the debris that we need to investigate or even if we want to see what the internal debris structure is. And so that's really valuable information. It's less glamorous than finding a person but it's really valuable information for our search and rescue teams to have.

[Ian]

Do you, do you think about. Have you thought about the sort of human experience of this? I just think, like, if I were trapped under a bunch of rubble, unsure if I was going to get out, and all of a sudden there was a rat in front of me pulling a switch on its. On its vest, it might only add to my terror.

[Dr. Danielle Giangrasso]

Yes. Or you may think you're hallucinating what's happening. So we've definitely thought about this. And so the first thing is, hopefully public awareness will help. So the more we can spread the news about this, the more people can hear about it. But also, the rats have. We have search and rescue colors on their backpacks, so it's orange. They have a light. And we've also played around with having a recording that plays, hey, I'm a rescue rat. I'm here surveying. Please let me know if you need help. Which may just add to the help.

[Sponsor Announcer]

We'll see.

[Mike]

A talking rat is here to save me. Well, cool. Dr. Giangrazo, thank you so much for telling us all about this.

[Christina Hunger]

Thank you.

[Dr. Danielle Giangrasso]

It was great speaking with you.

[Ian]

Please thank the rats for us for all their wonderful work they're doing.

[Dr. Danielle Giangrasso]

I definitely will thank you for considering them.

[Ian]

This is how to do everything. I'm Ian.

[Mike]

And I'm Mike. On today's show, you keep making us your out of office emergency contact. So we keep helping you out.

[Ian]

Sort of.

[Mike]

Sort of keep.

[Ian]

Sort of helping.

[Mike]

But first, hey, Dennis, what can we help you with?

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

Well, what do you do when you're in the dental chair and your dentist is carrying on a conversation with you, but has his hands in your mouth while he's doing so that's tough.

[Ian]

You know, I think about this all the time. Well, all the time when I'm at the dentist. Was there a time. Have you been to the dentist recently?

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

Yeah, I. I was there, and I'm in the chair, and the dentist says to me, I hear you're running for public office. And I just want you to know that even though you've been a patient of mine for 40 years, I don't agree with your positions, so I'm not going to vote for you.

[Mike]

Wow.

[Paola]

And then I had to go.

[Mike]

Well, Dennis, what was happening? What was the procedure he was doing? Was this just a cleaning or was there more going on?

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

No, he was doing a root canal, which was bad enough.

[Mike]

That is bad. Wow. All right, Dennis, we're going to take this and we're going to see what we can do to help you out.

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

Well, thank you very much.

[Ian]

Okay. We have an idea of how to help Dennis. Something that might help any of us when we're in the situation. We're going to call up Christina Hunger. Christina, we understand you can talk to your dog. Do I have that right?

[Christina Hunger]

That's correct. And she can talk back, which is the coolest part about it.

[Ian]

How does this work?

[Christina Hunger]

So she has a system of buttons that all represent a different word, and when she presses a button with her paw, it says the word that we've previously recorded into it. And this all came from technology that I used as a speech therapist with kids who were non verbal.

[Mike]

Wow.

[Ian]

I'm picturing there's like a kind of key, like a keyboard or something. Describe what I guess your dog is seeing.

[Christina Hunger]

Picture a giant, colorful keyboard on the ground, and it has rows of buttons on it that are about the size of her paw so that when she presses down, it says the word that we've recorded into it.

[Mike]

Can you give an example of, like, what a conversation is like then?

[Christina Hunger]

Yeah, absolutely. So we started with just some basic words. Like she would learn to tell me when she needed to go outside or when she wanted to play, when she needed to eat, or when her water dish was empty. But it's really evolved. So now she uses our names, different locations. She has question words, some simple emotions. So this morning, for example, I was tending to my toddler, and she was upset, and she said, mad want outside? Because I hadn't taken her out yet.

[Various Listeners/Guests]

Whoa.

[Christina Hunger]

And so then I let her out. She came back in. Then she marched right back to her board and told me, come eat, come eat. When she was ready for her breakfast.

[Mike]

What's your dog's name? What's her name?

[Christina Hunger]

Stella.

[Mike]

Stella. And the keyboard is customizable, so you can add words. What was the last word you added?

[Christina Hunger]

Actually, we haven't added words since my son was born. And we added his name and cry because that was a relevant word for the environmental change going on.

[Mike]

Wait, so how does that work? How does cry. How does Stella use that word?

[Christina Hunger]

So when he would be crying a lot, she would a lot of times say, cry all done or cry off. Or she would comment, my son's name is Max. So she would say, like, max cry. Max cry. So I'm hearing Max crying, and then I'm hearing Stella say, max cry. Everyone's trying to get patient to figure the situation out.

[Ian]

So you mentioned the word mad is on there because you would say mad outside. Are there other emotions on the board.

[Christina Hunger]

We just have Happy and Mad.

[Ian]

So like Happy, I don't have a dog, but I think, I think of our communication with dogs as mostly being them trying to tell us what they need. But like Happy might just be making conversation. Does she just make conversation Sometimes?

[Christina Hunger]

All the time. That's been the most surprising part of this. When I set out to teach her, my goal was to just give her a way to say some few basic needs. But I saw her starting to use words in ways that were really similar to kids, which I could recognize because I'm a speech therapist. And that's what I knew. She'll come back in from playing outside and say play happy and smile and lay on my feet. She didn't have to say that. She just wanted to let me know she was really happy playing outside.

[Ian]

That's so cool.

[Mike]

That's awesome.

[Ian]

What reactions have you seen from guests in your home of this happening for the first time?

[Christina Hunger]

So in the beginning it was really interesting because no one else had done this. Like I'm the one who started it. And sometimes I just wouldn't say anything. I would wait for Stella to just go on and talk and then see their reactions. And that was always really fun. Like I'll never forget, we had two friends over. They came in, we were kind of showing them around and then Selah went and got a drink of water and her, she finished her bowl and then she walked over to her board buttons and said, all done water. And the look on my friends faces because they had no idea about this. They were just in shock and had a million questions.

[Mike]

Well, we have a question from one of our listeners, Dennis. Dennis wants to know how he can have a good conversation with his dentist while in the dental chair while having tools in his mouth. And we're wondering if your invention maybe could help in Dennis's situation.

[Christina Hunger]

I totally think it could. It came from, you know, humans using devices when they're not able to communicate with verbal speech. So I think, you know, our buttons and just this whole concept, augmentative communication in general could absolutely solve that universal problem. When the dentist asks you something and you're laying there and you don't know how to respond when you can't talk.

[Ian]

Yeah, you would need to think of, kind of anticipate the dentist questions. But that's like, I think just in my experience it would be, I would need a button that said no, no big plan. That button.

[Christina Hunger]

Yep.

[Ian]

Of course I've been flossing that button.

[Christina Hunger]

Yes.

[Ian]

I wonder if there's a Way. Where are you based?

[Christina Hunger]

In the Chicago area.

[Ian]

Could we. Could we. Is there a way, I wonder if we could get this board to a dentist and try this out or.

[Christina Hunger]

Absolutely. Yeah, we definitely could.

[Ian]

Okay, so we have acquired. From Christina. Thank you, Christina. We've acquired this board. We've programmed it with our own messages, and we are now at the dentist because we're gonna try it out, and.

[Mike]

I'm gonna be getting. I'm the one getting in the chair. I'll be the patient.

[Ian]

So can I have you just introduce yourself?

[Theresa Neal]

Hi, I'm Theresa Neal, owner of Windy City Family Dental here on Michigan Avenue. Excited to meet Mike, See what's going on.

[Ian]

Thinking about Dennis. Question. Do you. When you're working on them, do you talk to your patients?

[Theresa Neal]

I go all the time.

[Ian]

Do you ask them questions?

[Theresa Neal]

Yeah, of course I do. That's how I get to know my patients.

[Ian]

But, I mean, you must know that it's hard for them to respond.

[Theresa Neal]

Is it hard? Most do.

[Mike]

Wait, are you. Do you ever have to stop what you're doing to continue a conversation?

[Theresa Neal]

Yeah. Yeah, sometimes I do.

[Mike]

Like, does it ever. Do you ever get into, like, deep philosophical conversations where yes or no just won't do?

[Theresa Neal]

Yes, sometimes I do. Yeah. So we'll stop and we'll talk. You know, like this. I'll pull my mask down and we'll start talking.

[Ian]

Are you. Are there any patients where you. You don't want to hear what they have to say, so you keep going?

[Theresa Neal]

Yes. Yes, definitely. Sometimes when it gets into, I don't know, sticky things like politics or just something I don't want to hear about. We have a device called a bite block where it kind of just keeps their mouth open and so they can't really close. They can't really stop and keep talking. We have different little tools we could use that will end the conversation pretty effectively.

[Ian]

So there are cases where you will use the bite block even if it is not dentally necessary?

[Theresa Neal]

Yes. Yeah.

[Ian]

Actually, it might be good to put. Yeah, to put a bite block in Mike.

[Mike]

Yeah. Okay, so let's try it then. Well, so we have this device that will do the talking for me so that I don't have to talk. And this is a device that was invented so that dogs could talk to their owners.

[Ian]

All right. Do you want to put it on top of the.

[Mike]

No, I think I.

[Ian]

You're okay. Okay.

[Theresa Neal]

So, welcome, Mike, to our practice. How are your teeth feeling today?

[Various Listeners/Guests]

Really, really good.

[Theresa Neal]

Yeah, they look pretty good. Let's see. How often are you brushing?

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

Oh, Every day.

[Announcer]

Every day.

[Christina Hunger]

Every day.

[Theresa Neal]

How about flossing?

[Various Listeners/Guests]

Of course I've been flossing.

[Theresa Neal]

So you're brushing pretty well.

[Various Listeners/Guests]

Really, really good.

[Theresa Neal]

Okay. I see a little. You had braces, too. I can see a little retainer here.

[Various Listeners/Guests]

Really, really good.

[Ian]

Mike, can I ask a question? How do you feel about me, your friend, being able to look into your mouth as you're getting a dental exam?

[Various Listeners/Guests]

I love that for you.

[Theresa Neal]

Yeah. I mean, your teeth look good.

[Ian]

They do look good, Mike.

[Theresa Neal]

They're very good examples.

[Various Listeners/Guests]

As Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray Love, said, having a broken heart is a good sign because it means you tried for something.

[Theresa Neal]

Okay, where's my bite block so far?

[Ian]

What do you think about this device? Would you want one of these, say, mounted on the chair so a patient could speak to you?

[Theresa Neal]

It's effective, but probably not. I don't know. We don't love it.

[Ian]

I think this device needs some refinement.

[Mike]

I think we have. We've uncovered the limitations of this device. I don't know that it works for this situation.

[Various Listeners/Guests]

Yeah.

[Ian]

Maybe the problem is we modified it when. Maybe we should have caught the. We just kept the dog responses or the dog responses outside food. I feel like if you're doing something a patient doesn't like and they keep saying outside, that communicates.

[Theresa Neal]

Stop. Yeah.

[Mike]

If you could reprogram this, what would you have me say?

[Theresa Neal]

A lot of yes and nos really is. Yeah. More simple things like, how are you doing? A lot of my patients do thumbs up, which is good. Thumbs down, which is. I need a break. That hurts.

[Announcer]

Yeah.

[Ian]

Do you think, being a dentist, do you think that that has made you better at telling when people are lying?

[Theresa Neal]

Yes, definitely. A lot of my patients lie to me about how well they're brushing their teeth, and I can tell.

[Mike]

Let me ask you this question. If I know I have a dentist appointment next week, should I start flossing the week before?

[Christina Hunger]

You should.

[Theresa Neal]

But I can tell still that you only started flossing recently. Yeah, I would say, like, at least three months of consistent flossing.

[Mike]

Oh, that's not gonna happen.

[Theresa Neal]

Yeah.

[Mike]

All right.

[Ian]

Well, do you and the hygienists you work with, do you have any kind of secret ways of communicating with each other? Like, if you don't. If you need to say something that you don't want the patient to know you're talking about, do you have kind of code words or anything?

[Theresa Neal]

Are we telling you what we do have? Code words? Yes, in the notes and when we speak to each other.

[Ian]

Okay, tell me One code word.

[Theresa Neal]

Triangle. We have a triangle patient. That means something.

[Ian]

Wait, what does it mean?

[Mike]

What does it mean?

[Theresa Neal]

It can mean a lot of different things. Usually just high maintenance, maybe in different ways.

[Ian]

Where does that come from? Why triangle?

[Theresa Neal]

I don't know. We just picked a triangle because it's not a common word that we would really ever use to describe a patient. It doesn't really mean anything to the average person. Sometimes their chart will be labeled triangle. And so if you or another patient sees triangle, they don't really know what that means.

[Ian]

Was Mike a triangle patient?

[Mike]

No.

[Theresa Neal]

Mike was awesome. Great teeth. Yeah.

[Ian]

Is that on? Because I don't want everybody to know it is on. Oh, it is on.

[Theresa Neal]

Okay.

[Ian]

So some patients talk more than others, like I do.

[Various Listeners/Guests]

This is.

[Ian]

This is one of the hygienists in the office. So I'm gonna go in there and I'm gonna tell her you have a phone call in room 10, which we don't have a room 10. So she knows she has to finish the conversation. So I have to get her out of there because we're running late.

[Theresa Neal]

Make it sound like an important phone call in room 10, which we don't have a room 10. So.

[Mike]

All right. We don't. I get the sense that there might be a phone call in room 10 that you guys should take. Thank you.

[Ian]

Thank you. You're welcome.

[Theresa Neal]

Thanks for stopping by.

[Mike]

I have thank you on here. Sorry.

[Theresa Neal]

See, that's what. See?

[Christina Hunger]

Okay.

[Theresa Neal]

You need that for sure.

[Mike]

There's so many we need.

[Theresa Neal]

Thank you.

[Ian]

Omg. I love that.

[Mike]

Christina Hunger, who invented this technology, wrote a book about her experience. It's called How Stella Learned to Talk. Stella's a dog.

[Ian]

Hey, Paola. Ooh.

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

This is your treasure.

[Mike]

It's your birthday treasure.

[Ian]

You found it.

[Mike]

Everyone else, just move on.

[Ian]

If you have questions for us, whatever they may be, you can get them to [e-mail] we promise we'll do our.

[Mike]

Best, our very best to find the perfect person to help solve your problem. Send those Questions to us howtopr.org.

[Sponsor Announcer]

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[Various Listeners/Guests]

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[Ian]

You have to know where you're going, right?

[Various Listeners/Guests]

What's the goal?

[Ian]

What's the destination? By identifying those goals, you can construct a well diversified portfolio that hopefully helps meet those goals.

[Various Listeners/Guests]

For more information and important disclosures, visit ameriprise.com Advice Ameriprise Financial cannot guarantee future financial results securities offered by ameriprise Financial Services llc, Member FINRA and SIPC Our.

[Ian]

Offer still stands to be your out of office email emergency contact when you go on vacation and this week somebody named Paola put us as her contact when she went off to celebrate her birthday week.

[Mike]

Specifically she said, I am mentally away celebrating my birthday week. All birthday messages, celebration logistics and general love notes should be trusted to Mike and Ian.

[Ian]

We got a slew of responses. Let's get to them now.

[Mike]

Hey Ken. So Ken, what's going on?

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

Well it was kind of a strange reply so I tried contacting her several different ways and so I finally emailed her and I got this weird out of office reply saying to contact you guys. So is that you can help me with in terms of finding out what's going on with her birthday?

[Mike]

So you're trying to figure out like what her plans are or if there is a party, because we. We saw the. I think we saw the same out of office message you did.

[Ian]

But we don't know any further details at this point, but we will try and track it down.

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

That'd be great.

[Mike]

Okay, so if you wanted us to convey a message to Paola regarding her birthday, or if you have a question, what. What would it be?

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

Just happy birthday from kin. Where are you? What are you up to? And I guess that's about it.

[Mike]

Okay, terrific. And what birthday is this? Do you know?

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

You mean her age?

[Mike]

I guess. Yeah, I guess I am asking that. I don't know if that's something.

[Ian]

You don't have to answer that.

[Mike]

Yeah, maybe she's uncomfortable. I don't know, maybe she's not. Maybe she just embraces the passage of time. I don't know.

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

She's a year older. That's all I can say.

[Ian]

Okay, that's good diplomacy. Okay. I feel like. So we're at the beginning of this process. Can you tell us just like a little bit about her as we kind of shape, maybe what we might want to do?

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

Well, she knows a lot of people. She's pretty outgoing. She's a very friendly person and she loves to dance.

[Mike]

Oh, okay. That's fun.

[Ian]

Any dietary restrictions?

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

Yeah, preferably no lactose.

[Mike]

Hey, Eduardo, we got an email from you seeking assistance in celebrating Paola's birthday.

[Ian]

We're happy to help you. If maybe there's some wishes you want to convey, we can send them to her.

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

Yeah, sounds good. Be great.

[Mike]

How long have you known Paula?

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

She's my sister, actually.

[Mike]

Sorry, she's your sister?

[Paola]

Yeah.

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

As a joke. Right. I sent her a text. I sent her an email. I sent her WhatsApp and he called her.

[Christina Hunger]

And when I.

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

When I got the email back, I was like, what is this?

[Announcer]

Yeah.

[Ian]

So, okay, so let's see. Why don't we just. We'll. We'll just give you an opening right now. You can. You can say a birthday message for your sister.

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

Sure. Feliciares e quiero mucho. Hope you've had a fantastic birthday. And we're just entering the weekend, so lots more to celebrate and love you very much and wish you the best.

[Mike]

That's fantastic.

[Ian]

You seem like a great brother.

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

I try to be.

[Paola]

Yeah.

[Ian]

So we're. We're going to try and take our duty very seriously and try and do something for Paola. Can you tell us. We don't know. We've never met her. We don't know anything about her. Do you want to tell Us something about her so we know what. What maybe we want to do.

[Dennis / Ken / Eduardo (various callers)]

Sure. She likes dark chocolate, that's for sure. Glass of wine and white and dark chocolate. What else? Yeah, when we were kids, we used to do, like, treasure hunts for me and my sister, but those more were just memories. Anything else? But yeah.

[Mike]

Okay, so we wanted to do something nice for Paola, so we sent an edible arrangement to her school.

[Ian]

A bouquet of fruit.

[Mike]

This is with dark chocolate and no lactose.

[Paola]

Can you hear me?

[Mike]

Hello, Paola.

[Dr. Danielle Giangrasso]

Hi.

[Mike]

Happy birthday, Paola.

[Paola]

Thank you. Thank you so much. I'm still laughing about all this.

[Ian]

Yeah, we got a lot of people reached out to us needing help to celebrate your birthday. We talked to Ken. We talked to your brother Eduardo.

[Paola]

I just needed some mental time away, and I didn't really want to plan for anything this time. So I wasn't purposely picking up the phone or answering texts. People found it a little bit weird. My mom was utterly confused.

[Ian]

We didn't hear. We didn't hear from your mom?

[Paola]

Yeah, they thought someone from work was trying to help me to relax. I have no idea. She did not understand.

[Mike]

Well, did it. Did it work? Do you feel rejuvenated?

[Paola]

I do. I think it worked. You know, and of course I wanted to leave this with someone I could trust to do absolutely nothing helpful. And you two were, you know, the obvious choice. So that's.

[Ian]

That's. That is. That is who we are.

[Paola]

I trusted you guys fully.

[Ian]

You know, I think one thing we're going to do, we want to do one more thing. So your brother told us that when you were kids, you used to do treasure hunts.

[Paola]

Yeah, that's right.

[Ian]

I think what we're gonna do, we're gonna hide treasure in this podcast episode.

[Paola]

Okay.

[Ian]

Probably by this point in the episode, everyone will have heard it and wondered what that was, but now they know that was your birthday treasure hidden in here somewhere.

[Paola]

Oh, that's so sweet.

[Mike]

Well, happy birthday.

[Paola]

Thank you so much. Thank you. Thank you. All right, I love you guys.

[Mike]

If you having just heard this, having heard how we helped Paola with her birthday, if you want us to be your out of office emergency contact, just copy and paste the out of office message from our show notes.

[Ian]

We blew our entire budget on one edible arrangement, so we will not be helping in that way, but any other way, we'll do our best.

[Mike]

Well, that does it for this week's show. What'd you learn, Ian?

[Ian]

I learned dogs. I think it's amazing. I learned dogs just sometimes just want to make conversation.

[Various Listeners/Guests]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Yeah, that does change things, doesn't it?

[Ian]

It's not just, you know, give me food, let me out. I don't like the way you're talking to me right now.

[Mike]

Don't patronize me. I'm not, I'm not always a good boy.

[Ian]

You know, Mike, I. One other thing that this episode's been making me think about. I just, you know, there's a lot of people out there with broken hearts.

[Mike]

Okay. Right.

[Ian]

And if they're listening to us right now, I just wonder if you have any advice.

[Mike]

Oh, for people with broken hearts, sure.

[Announcer]

Yeah.

[Mike]

You know, okay. Yeah. Now that you mentioned it, it does.

[Various Listeners/Guests]

Remind me, as Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat Pray Love, said, having a broken heart is a good sign because it means you tried for something.

[Ian]

It is weird, right, Mike, that we in programming the dentist talking board.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Ian]

We had a long quote from Elizabeth Gilbert, but we didn't think to put in. Thank you.

[Mike]

I feel like, again, we had a lot of missed opportunities.

[Ian]

If Stella hears this episode, she's going to have a lot of strong criticism.

[Mike]

Out crying Podcast Bad Dorks Attack.

[Ian]

How to Do Everything is produced by Hina Srivastava and Skyler Swenson.

[Mike]

Technical direction from Lorna White. Our intern this week is Kin Kin. Thanks for helping us celebrate Paola's birthday.

[Ian]

And happy birthday to you whenever that birthday.

[Mike]

If you have any questions, we're happy to try and answer them. You can send them to [e-mail] I'm Ian. And I'm Mike. Thanks. Thanks.

[Various Listeners/Guests]

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