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Ronnie
Audible's best of 2024 picks are here.
Ben
From memoirs and sci fi to mysteries and thrillers, Audible's curated list in every category is the best way to hear 2024's best in audio entertainment.
Ronnie
Like a stunning new full cast production of George Orwell's 1984 and Percival Everett's.
Ben
Brilliantly subversive James Audible, there's more to.
Ronnie
Imagine when you listen.
Ben
I actually am really excited to hear George Orwell's 1984 again because last time I read that was back in I don' middle school or something like that. And the world has changed so much with technology and everything like that. I feel like now is the perfect time to revisit and listen to it on Audible.
Ronnie
Especially when it's told by a full cast like that, like it's a full production that's going to be like a radio play. You know, that's major. Go to audible.com crap ins and discover all the years best waiting for you. That's audible.com crap ins reconnecting with people.
Ben
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Ronnie
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Ben
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Ronnie
I've been making really funny ones. I mean, I'm the new Maxine. Find the perfect holiday card for you@shutterfly.com and start customizing today.
Ben
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Ronnie
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Ben
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Ronnie
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Ben
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Ronnie
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Ben
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Ronnie
Trial that's P H I L O T V to start watching.
Ben
There's so much. Who cares what happens when there's so much that happens?
Ronnie
Well, hello and welcome to watch what happens. We're a podcast about all the things we just love to talk crap about on your bravs. I'm Rondell. That's Ben over there. Hi, Ben.
Ben
Hi, Ronnie.
Ronnie
How are you guys? We're so excited to be here. It's real housewives of Beverly hills day. I've missed this show. I love this show. I'm so glad it's back on my telly. Kyle's crying, Dorit's pissed. It's so good. So welcome back show and welcome back to the audience who's just here for Beverly hills. You know, sometimes you just want to listen to Beverly hills. That's it. So we only see you once a year. So you guys, welcome home. I'm still a. And Ben's still an angel and very handsome. Okay, hush. Thanks to people over at Jeff Lewis for having us on Sirius today. Super fun time. Jeff and Gabe. It's a great time. No, I did not do that on purpose. That was shady Jeff and Shane. And we got to hang out with Reza Farahan, which is very fun. We've never done that before.
Ben
Yeah.
Ronnie
And really good time over there. Those guys are so nice to us. So thanks for having us over there. Check it out if you have Sirius, I'm extra lispy today. I don't know why I'm accentuated lisp. I don't know where it's coming from, but I'm rolling with it.
Ben
No, yeah, I like it. Yeah. Beverly Hills, the premiere. I didn't start. I didn't watch this episode till late at night because I was cooking food. I'm not going to lie. Not that that's anything. That's shameful to say, but I was nothing to lie about. Not gonna. I'm not gonna lie. You look great right now. I was cooking some food, but before I even turned it on, I got two or three separate dms Saying, wow, Beverly Hills is amazing tonight. And I was like, wow, that's amazing to hear. Because honestly, it's been a long time since I have truly felt like Beverly Hills has been amazing. We. It is the most popular show right now on Bravo, right? Or the most popular Real Housewives. And it whip a frenzy every year and people watch it and. And we have episodes. We're like, oh, my God, that was a crazy episode. But I feel like Beverly Hills has been a little kind of polite and stayed over the past seven years or so. I mean, it's always been kind of like that, but it's been a little bit more. I don't know, like, it still had has the stink of the Fox, Fox Force Five, whatever it's called. And I feel like my hot take is that the premiere felt like they were leaning into the camp a bit more. It was. I think they took some lessons from Salt Lake City and they really amped up the ridiculousness of it. And I loved it. What did you think?
Ronnie
Yeah, I just really liked it. You know, I don't. I don't.
Ben
I don't.
Ronnie
I'm not as, like, statement heavy as, like, it's. It's back. It's brilliant. I mean, I don't know. I don't. I don't really know, but I loved the first one. I thought it was just so good. And it's just so good to have him back, you know what I mean? And it's also nice to see people moving along in the storylines, which is good because sometimes on these shows, it just gets so stale, where it's like, okay, you know, she's still with him and Doris still pretending to have money and. And this time everything's kind of on its head, you know, everything's really different this time, so I think that's fun. The casting is great already. We can tell that the new casting is fantastic. Jennifer Tilly and Bos. Boz. Boss.
Ben
Is it Boz or Boz? I can't remember. I think it's Bows.
Ronnie
I was calling her Boz, and Kathy said, it's Boz, and they said, no, boss.
Ben
No, she said boss. Oh, I think it's Bows, because in my mind, because I'm always going to a pun place. I was like, like, Bose headphones. I had that thought.
Ronnie
I don't know, but I thought it was Boz. But anyway, she's hilarious and great and fantastic and extremely strong. Like, she has no fear in her. She just came right in and is ready to take over, which I liked.
Ben
You can Always tell.
Ronnie
I thought it was great.
Ben
Funny, isn't it? Funny how you can always tell with, like, a new cast member if they're working. It's just like that snap judgment thing. Like, oh, she's fitting right in right away. She's gonna be with us for a few years. Yeah.
Ronnie
Yeah. You usually know right away. Not always, though. I mean, there are people who kind of snuck up on us. Angie from Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. Snuck up. I mean, she was always, like, awkward and funny, but I never thought she'd make it. I mean, she's really tap dancing her way through and just making more and more of an impress, you know? See, you never really know who's gonna come out of the shadows and do it, but, yeah, a lot of time you can just. It's the Rizz, baby.
Ben
There is.
Ronnie
She's got the Riz.
Ben
Yeah. Some people have to do the Gina and Emily route, which is just show up. And some people just have it, you know?
Ronnie
Yeah, some people got it. So here we are. Season 14, episode one. It's called Grace Time is Over, which means, like, no more rest. But it also means, like, stop praying. You're screwed now. Like, we're done praying. All right, it's back to hardball, people.
Ben
So the episode begins. Text appears on screen. We see it's two weeks after the reunion, and Kyle has flown to Nashville to see Morgan in concert. And then there's headlines saying that she was sitting front and center at Morgan Waits concert. And then another headline to say, Kyle went to the bathroom at Morgan's concert. And another to say that she got some Milk duds at Morgan's concert. We just know everything about her going to that concert at this point.
Ronnie
And can I just tell you, Nobody cares. So that's how I know that she is just putting out all these stories. Nobody cares about Kyle and Morgan. No one. No one will convince me that anybody cares enough for all these stories to come out. And we have the OC Thing with Heather calling. You know, did Heather call the paps or did she not? Why isn't Kyle getting any of it? Kyle's definitely calling the paps. Okay, because Morgan's not doing. You know, it's not Morgan who's doing it. Morgan's probably like, wow, these people showed up with cameras all the time, Kyle. I mean, what are those suitcases? Little holes in them to take pictures? What are they? What? They're. They're camp. They're stealing your image. Morgan.
Ben
What else did you say in that movie? I think that's the only thing that Billy Bob Thornton said. Sling Blade.
Ronnie
Yeah. I guess she would be like, sing Blade because she's a singer.
Ben
You look real pretty, Kyle. So. Yeah. So then we see also headlines like Cal Mauricio are living separate lives under the same roof. And while he's looking for a new home, by the way, I don't know why, you know where all the homes are. Why do you not have a new home yet, Mauricio?
Ronnie
And they literally represent all the homes for sale in la. Do you even see other signs now? All I see is that red. A sign. You know, the agency.
Ben
There's a song playing. How did the song go?
Ronnie
It was like it went just like this. I live my life around. I'm happy now. I figured out I need no seat belts. I think it said I don't need the seat belt.
Ben
Yeah.
Ronnie
Which is dangerous, Especially in Beverly Hills because they have that traffic, that traffic. That moment of like eight streets coming together with.
Ben
People don't realize.
Ronnie
People don't realize this. That. Go ahead.
Ben
No, people don't realize how crazy the intersections are in Beverly Hills. You just sort of casually mentioned it. But there is an eight way intersection in Beverly Hills with no traffic light. It's just stop signs. It is the most terrifying thing and I believe they put it in there to have poor people crash into each other to keep poor people. They're like, oh, well, they're like. Poor people don't want to go to Beverly Hills because they know they're going to crash their car. Because you always get routed into it. And then everyone just. It's like it's. Every time you get through it, you feel like you've played squid game. It is the most wild intersection. It's a real thing.
Ronnie
Yeah, it's a real thing. It's terrifying. And just rich people are like, we don't want lines on the street so we don't have to have them.
Ben
Yeah.
Ronnie
I don't want lines in the street. I love my life. I don't call the paparazzi. I love my life. That's how the song goes. I love it. It's just like this nice mellow. I love my life. And then we're watching everybody loving their life. Like Dorit is. She's having tea with a little fluffy dog that she hasn't given back yet and she haven't even had. She hasn't even had an assistant take it back to the pound. So that's good. And says she has a coffee cup that says something like loved or something. And Then she kisses the dog on the mouth. And then she reads Vogue. And then Erica comes on screen and she's doing a photo shoot on the set of, like, Psycho 3. It's like the Norman Bates Hotel. I don't know. It's like some U haul rental in Burbank. And you just see Mikey with the camera going, no, Mikey's working the fog machine. You just hear Mikey going, yeah. Because we opened and we immediately started with the mic.
Ben
Erica is still maintaining her commitment to her artistic aesthetic from the past nine years, the artistic aesthetic that powered her all the way to the top of the three hundreds of the Billboard charts. So I'm just so proud of her.
Ronnie
She did half as good as Katy Perry, you know, that's. That's pretty good. She's wearing, like, some makeshift fanny pack in this. She's got, like a kind of a gold, like, belt, like, I guess Chanel belt type thing over a leather. Listen, she's Erica on a budge. And I'm liking it. I'm really liking it. I don't know what the set's supposed to. It looks like they built a set for this, but it just looks like a bad motel. You could have just gone under a freeway overpass for free.
Ben
That's okay. You know what? I still remember when Jessie J did her video for Domino. And honestly, Erica's looks better than that. So you know what? Like, sometimes you have a budget, sometimes you don't. And sometimes you only have half a budget and you just make it work.
Ronnie
Whatever.
Ben
Whatever you can.
Ronnie
Yeah. And she's doing it. You know, she's going along. And then we see ya, Erica, Fog machine Erica. And then we see Kyle working out. I can just say I don't ever want to be shot. Working out. Kyle looks pretty good working out. I mean, her body's killer. She's got a new face this season, as you usual, great face. She went back to her original face, which I think is a bold move. I talked about it this morning already. I've never seen anybody go ask the doctor for their original face. Like, you spent 10 revisions getting rid of that face. And she's like, no, no, I want it back now. I think it looks great. I think she looks fantastic. So there. I'll start on a positive note. You look fantastic, lady.
Ben
Yes. And she is working out because that's her personality. And then we go to Garcelle's house where a dog runs up to her, and she's. She's telling the dog that she has to go to Atlanta to Pack. And the dog is like. Like, I give a fuck. Give me food, you know? And then we go over to.
Ronnie
He's like, well, I would complain, but I've seen how the goldfish lives. So.
Ben
So then we see Sutton. She's driving through Bel Air. She waves at Kathy's house. She's like, hi, Kathy. But the house that she winds up going to, the music suddenly gets quiet. Very quiet. There's no sound. Just her walking through, like, shrubberies and topiaries. She knocks on a door, and then the door opens, and it is Oscar nominee Jennifer Tilly.
Ronnie
Hello. Welcome to my home. She's got, like, a caftan on, and she's like. Lives in this old Spanish, like, a.
Ben
Giant, like, antique roulette wheel. It's. Oh, I love her. I'm so. I. I also am loving that she showed up now in Like a Friend overall, because last season she was on. But I think she was like, you guys are not gonna use this on camera, right? I'm just. I'm just here having lunch. But this year, she's like, oh, I am gonna be on camera. So let me be, like, at, like, maximum Jennifer Tilly for you all.
Ronnie
She really is. I mean, she gives us the whole thing, and it's so good. And I also like that she's a professional. She has a house of Bel Air. And she's like, if you want me to do you show you can pay me properly in the meantime, I'll just show up and smile and say, sutton, you're correct. But then when they give her money, she's like.
Ben
And she has this big belly laugh, which I never realized she had a belly laugh because she's like, oh, satin.
Ronnie
It's so good to see you.
Ben
Did you notice that? She was like.
Ronnie
And I love her. From her performance in Bullets Over Broadway, her character was the gangster's mall. You know, who he paid to get into the Broadway show as? She's just an idiot. You know, it's like chime chomped. I'm sure. Leave me the dog alone. Like, she would get really deep in guttural, and her voice would completely change. And she's actually like that because we hear her, like, in this. She's like, oh, Sutton, you're such a delicious mother. You know, all the things you do for your children is just so wonderful, Satan the way you are. And then two minutes later, she's like, I have a beer spout. She changes her voice and inflections. I'm already in love with her.
Ben
I know. I'm also surprised she's in Bel Air. I would never have expected Jennifer Tilly to be a Bel Air type. I thought. I would have thought she'd be in the hills of, like, Los Feliz or something. So it's funny that she's kind of this, like, actress in Bel Air who, like, over the past 10 or 15 years, has really kind of, like, been doing, like, the child's play, like, Bride of Chucky thing, which is also hilarious that that's, like, the chapter that she's in. So I just. I just love everything about her. I loved since 1994 with Bullets Over Broadway. Like, and I highly recommend that movie. I know it's Woody Allen. Whatever. It's such a good movie. And just to see her in it. And Diane Wiest. It is. And. And Tracy Oldman. It's like just. It's just like the. It's like a perfect movie. Everyone, please watch it.
Ronnie
Yeah, it's a good one. So Sutton's like, oh, Jennifer, it's just so over the top. I mean, I could seen her five minutes ago, but she'll see me again, and she's going to be like.
Ben
So then. The other thing I love about Jennifer Tilly is that when she's, like, talking more calmly, she has kind of like this funny, clipped voice. And I don't know if I can even do it, but she's like, you'll be so happy. I bought all kinds of snacks at the Bel Air Hotel. Have you had your favorite grapefruit? Grapefruit juice. So come on in. I'll give you your favorite grapefruit juice.
Ronnie
She does that accent from the 50s, that housewife accent from the 50s.
Ben
And she's like, so happy.
Ronnie
I got all kinds of snacks at the ballet hotel for you certainly have your favorite grapefruit juice. So you come on in. Do you want some grape juice? Juice and vodka.
Ben
Got you some really ancient vodka from nine years ago. But vodka never goes old, does it? It's like wine. It gets better when it's odor rate.
Ronnie
So she's like, Sutton's telling us she's one of my best friends. And we see them getting some drinks, and Sutton's just like, keep pouring, keep pouring, keep pouring. And she tells us we are lunch buddies, we're travel buddies, we just pick up the phone and talk kind of buddies. And all of a sudden, we're just laughing. I just love her. And so we see pictures of them at Runway shows in Paris and the neon pink and, you know, black dresses with boas.
Ben
Yes. And so they're just, like, talking. Jennifer's like, oh, I love your ring. He's got a mouth of pearl. He's got a. He's got a pearl in his mouth. But then you have pearls on your bracelet, so it's almost like he ate the pearl. I'm like, it's not this. It's not the narrative I would have. I've just been like, it's just two pearl items, but I love that she created a story that the ring ate the pearl and then shouted out on the bracelet.
Ronnie
And she does it like it's this big scandal. Like, it is almost as if the ring ate the pearl. Bad ring. Bad, bad ring. Right, Sut?
Ben
And then she sounds like, well, this. This here is from the panther collection. She goes, oh, did you mean panther? Something's like, excuse me, I speak French. Okay. I was trying to make it sound fancy.
Ronnie
To have cool girl summer. Right, Saturn?
Ben
Yes. Cool girl summer. I don't understand that, but sure, I'll just say yes.
Ronnie
Because Porter graduated from college, and then, you know, the other one's going to law school, and I love that. And then Porter's going to be home for the summer. Right, Right, Sutton?
Ben
Yes. I found her a gig fixing vending machines at the local pool, so she's gonna work on that.
Ronnie
You really raised them right. They're like, I don't think your kids are going to be spouting it up or stealing cars or sneaking out past midnight. Your kids are like kids from the 50s. Su.
Ben
Yes. So I was thinking, I had a really nice time in Spain last year, and I was thinking about Merce Cunningham and how I took the ashes. Rolled. Rolled a clip of Erica Merce.
Ronnie
Lillian.
Ben
Okay, we're back. So I just thought it'd be kind of cool because, you know, everybody knows about Salvador Dali. At least the non. Idiots do. And Dali was one of the central figures in the moment of surrealism. So let me bring all these ladies back to Spain on that trip, and let's just make them look like idiots on camera for the ones who know who. Who Dolly is and the ones who don't. Thought that'd be fun, right?
Ronnie
Splendid ideas with splendid ideas. Satin. You just don't see more many people having Dolly parties these days.
Ben
I just want to say that Dolly parties on Bravo. That innovation began on the real Girlfriends of Paris. Really? Girlfriends in Paris with Anya Firestone, who did the lobster in her hair in her whole Dolly party. So let's just, like, not forget that wonderful show.
Ronnie
Oh, my God. Credit where credit is due please.
Ben
Another great show that people really did not get on board with. But if you go back and watch it, it's fabulous.
Ronnie
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Ben
This is why you don't let your children become actors, okay? Because at some point in their life they're going to wind up on camera proudly ignorant of who Salvador Dolly is.
Ronnie
So back to Sutton and Sutton's like, well, Kyle's been going through a lot. And I gotta tell you, honestly, maybe I wasn't the greatest friend. Maybe I wasn't the greatest friend the past year. And then we see flashback to Kyle at her weed dinner, and Sutton being like, is something. Is something going on with your personal life that you'd like to share?
Ben
Kyle, I hate when Sutton does this, when she does the right thing by us, the audience, and then feels guilty about it and then tries to become friends with Kyle again. No, Sutton, you were the best friend. You were the friend to Kyle that Kyle was to you, and you should not feel bad about that.
Ronnie
You did all the right, better friend to Kyle than Kyle was to her. And absolutely, by the way, for anyone new to this, yes, I'm kind of anti Kyle. I'm going to try and be a little more even keeled and start on a fresh thing, a fresh foot or whatever. But it is. We're talking about the last season. And, yeah, Kyle does do that with Sutton. She's bad, and she's gonna trick her. Watch what she's gonna do. She's. This is what Kyle always does. She tricks Sutton and is like, we're friends. And then she comes on the show, she's like, we're not friends. And then she rips her the entire season. So let's watch.
Ben
Sutton's gonna be a hot commodity this season because I guarantee Dorit and Kyle are going to be battling to have her as her as their ally, because it's a war. The season's a war between the two of them, and they have to start. They've got to find out who the soldiers are for Kyle and who the.
Ronnie
Soldiers are for Doritos. My favorite game to be played.
Ben
Truly, truly, truly. So anyway, son's like, she's feeling guilty, and she's like, you know, she's like, well, I did go out to dinner with Kyle, and at first we're like, how we're supposed to do this? And I was like, kyle, you put the food on the fork. God, you really have been out of the game for a long time.
Ronnie
You know, I just thought, kyle, Kyle's not being very nice to me. So I did something that I know is a magic trick, and it's really not fair for me to do, but I ordered a parmesan cheese wheel. Not the parmesan cheese wheel, Sutton. I did. She couldn't concentrate on anything else. She started that couple of times. I just said, you love Sutton. You love Sutton. And she just said, I love Sutton. She started licking the parmesan I let her take a little piece of it home.
Ben
You ever see that movie Roger Rabbit?
Ronnie
Remember?
Ben
He's in the back room and he can't resist when the play shuffle him. Haircut. Shaven haircut. That's Kyle with a Parmesan wheel.
Ronnie
I've never seen somebody so mesmerized as Kyle was by that Parmesan cheese wheel. I'll never forget that when she was on a date with Mori and they brought the pasta and were serving it out of. And she did not want to eat it because it was pasta, you know, and that's like a sin in Beverly Hills. But she just couldn't stop staring at it.
Ben
That's when the marriage was over. Let's be honest. We knew that. That's when she's like, if my husband's going to do this to me on tv, I'm going to the other side.
Ronnie
He can. Yeah, he can talk a big game, but you want to talk about someone being unsupportive, this is it. The Parmesan cheese wheel. Yeah, Parmesan cheese.
Ben
Real great moment. So basically, sun's like, yeah, at first it was awkward for the first 10 minutes, but then the things softened and she's like. She's like, you know, I needed to reach out to cop because, well, one, I missed her, which I'm obligated to say on camera, even though I really didn't miss her at all. And then I started to see things when I was online shopping that I knew she'd be jealous of me buying. I mean, sorry that I knew I should buy for her, and so I just missed sending it to her like that. That was my favorite thing, was to send her a little gift to remind her that I'm just more wealthy than she is. I don't have that anymore in my life. I want that back.
Ronnie
And Jennifer, at this point, has wasted all of her fun energy. She's just like, aw, that's great. She's like, done now. She's like, are we finished now? I'm just a friend of. Right.
Ben
She's like a birthday sparkler. She is.
Ronnie
She's a sparkler at the club. So then we get to the Pacific Design center, which is such a bizarre place to shoot a housewife scene.
Ben
I know.
Ronnie
Get everybody even loaded into this place. It's vast. It is vast.
Ben
It's vast and empty at all times. But they decided for whatever reason, this is where we're going to anchor this scene. So Erica pulls up in her car and everything, and she goes to a place Called Mogul, which is hilarious. And this lady's like, welcome to Mogul. She's like, I'm Erica. And I'm Maria. Thank you so much for having me. Stop pretending like you care about the lady from Mogul. So Erica is redecorating because she's going to purge some old memories in the form of sofas and chairs.
Ronnie
Yeah. She's like, now that I'm done with Tom and Tom's going to wherever he's going, but it's time to end it. It's time to end the chapter. So I need to spend money on new couches.
Ben
Yes.
Ronnie
Well, listen, I get it. Shopping changes you, you know, so I'm at home goods every day, just changing. That's why I'm different every day when I come, I'm just fresher every day, you guys, home goods. Even if it's just a little jelly belly that you buy on your way.
Ben
Out, just get a little jelly belly. So Dorit walks in, freshly separated from her jelly belly, and she's like, like, oh, hello.
Ronnie
Look.
Ben
Oh, look at you. Oh my God. How.
Ronnie
How are you?
Ben
It's so good to see you, honey. She's like, oh, how have you been, baby? So much to catch up on. If you have any sort of discussion about furniture that you'd like to get out of the way, I'm going to drop some bombs right afterwards. So do you want to have your moment talking about your debons and love seats, etc?
Ronnie
Well, you know how it is. My house is just the timing. I vacuum it and I dust it and I sing country songs to myself. And then before you know it, it's, I'm done. I've got my kitchen, I've got my bedroom, and then your closet. It's hilarious, really. Your poor, poor, literally poor thing. And then we see some sad Erica stuff, you know, like 2015 there.
Ben
And Erica sets it up with this curious wording. She goes, you know, I spent 20 plus years on what some people will refer to as a mansion. Who are the ones who are not referring to it as a mansion. Are you trying to. I feel like she's trying to shame people. Someone, but I don't know who it is.
Ronnie
I think she's trying to show that she's more real now. Like, she's like more of a real person now, which she probably is. Like, she's had to live in the real world for a few years and now she's like, maybe it's problematic that I say I lived in a mansion. Yeah. So she's like some people would call it a mansion. I never would because I'm not a bragging kind of a girl.
Ben
Yeah, I just call it home. So we see like, yeah, 2015 sad footage. But now she's in her tiny hobble of a home that couldn't cost more than $3 million. Just a little outhouse, basically. And she wants to get rid of.
Ronnie
This one was a two million dollar home in west Hollywood and probably like, oh my God, poor Erica. Oh, the two million dollar home. Just shoot me in the face. I can't take it anymore. I love when they showed her walking in there for the first time. And Mike is like, we can work with this. We can work with this. Look, there's floors, there's a counter. And Erica's just like, God damn it, Tom.
Ben
Isn't it a three bedroom?
Ronnie
You better hope that this gets you, because I'm right behind. Yeah, what's that?
Ben
Isn't it a three bedroom? Because she uses like, it's a three bedroom.
Ronnie
Yeah, she uses two closets, Right.
Ben
It's just a tiny little shack with a spare. Spare bedroom that could be used as closets.
Ronnie
That's it. And so she's like, well, we do in the living rooms. A real step in the right direction. So I brought you here today as my style friend to sort of look around and see what the possibilities are like, oh, I'm so for it. I'm so privileged to be here next to such a poor, poor person. Would you like to talk about this in Land Rover? Laugh.
Ben
Gee. So they're looking around. Erica can't sit down on anything because she has like makeup on. She doesn't want to ruin anything in the shower room, which is. Which does show that she really is not super wealthy anymore because a rich person doesn't give a fuck about that. They're like, whatever.
Ronnie
I was going to say this shows that she's really trying her good person thing on this year because she's like, look, I care about couches in the design center, which is so weird. But yeah, you're right. She's like, yeah, I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna get my on there. And so Dorit's like, I've got news girl. So she tries to sit. She finds somewhere that they can wipe down with the paper towel later. And she's like, all right, listen, I won't ruin anything, I promise. It's probably your life if you really are a mogul. Well, well, all right, there we go ahead.
Ben
Well, I've got good news. Or bad news. And she's like, you've got bad news? Oh, no. Well, all right. We'll start with the bad news. No, I would like to start with the good news, which is I can have Pringles in the house again. I'm so happy. The bad news.
Ronnie
Well, there's some good news. It seems that I've checked the scorecard, and diabetes is winning.
Ben
Good news is the Ben and Jerry's I bought last night still there. The bad news.
Ronnie
I'll tell you, you won't be getting any tanning juice anywhere.
Ben
So the bad news that you absolutely have not heard of before the scene, PK and I have agreed to separate. America's like.
Ronnie
Why, Erica? Why are you leaning back on that bench and spreading your legs open? It's the ball move. When I'm nervous, I do dance moves. My is the python tick ticket like a time bomb.
Ben
How many do I give? Actually, quite a bit to read. I'm very serious. I'm very serious right now. Very serious right now, babe. Very serious. I give a lot of right now.
Ronnie
And so Erica's, you know, doing the drama thing, and she's like, I'm gonna cry. I'm gonna cry. White print, white friend. Why are you waiting for it? It ain't coming. Just moving along. Just pretend I'm crying. Cameras, move over there. Get the reel. Hey, mogul lady. Come on over here.
Ben
Okay.
Ronnie
Can you cry?
Ben
She's crying for me. She understands empathy.
Ronnie
Don't cry for me, Acantina. So Dorit's like, it's ironic. I'm confiding an aircraft to what she said at Prabhukin. So we see a flashback to BravoCon 2022, and Erica's there in her full evil villain moment with her baby Jane hair and her streaked makeup and her just, like, a terrible attitude. And Andy's asking, like, what Bravo Liberty relationship do you think is headed to splitsville? And she said, I think it's Dorit and pink egg.
Ben
Gee, you know, I don't think she saw something that I didn't see. I think she knew that there was triple in paradise as much as living in Encino is paradise. And she had a shady question, and she answered with a shady question.
Ronnie
Yeah. And so Dorit's like, well, it's sad and it's hard, and it's also new secret that we had a really rough couple of years. Erka. We've had a couple of years. And then before, you know, with most married couples, you have your issues. You have your issues. Don't you. And so we see some of their issues where Dorit is at her pretty woman party, where somehow Berlin was there and she sang about and she was like, pk, you know, I take a long time because you just seem to think that all of this. All of this look just happens.
Ben
Yeah, it's like, all right, babe, to be honest, I think maybe I'm not going to bother with surprises anymore for you. So next time I'm just going to be like, balloon is here and you'll just have to deal with it. So then we see there, there are therapy where he calls some of her PTSD obnoxious. And so Dorit's saying, like, tells Erica, like, you know what I mean? And you know, like the. We deal with things differently. And you know, pk, he was pouring alcohol on his. Lots and lots of alcohol. Alcohol were his new Pringles. And so he just became a full blown alcohol. You ever see leaving Las Vegas? It should be called leaving Encino because that was PK average time he left home.
Ronnie
I just can't have that toxic energy around small children. He's just drunk, drunk, drunk. One time I caught him eating cereal and into snickers bars and in a bowl of vodka.
Ben
PK has. PK has always been a big drinker. You can. It's literally any sort of meal he'll put in the blender to mix it along up with some tequila. And over the years, it's just gotten progressively worse and little fights turn into blowups, blow ups turn into tequila, tequila turns into gin, gin turns into beer. It's just non stop, drinky, drinky, drinky, drinky, drinky with pk and she said.
Ronnie
And finally I told him, you need to dry out for a week. And then a week turned into a journey. And I love that. Dorit's like, oh, my God. And then he did stop drinking. And it's been a nightmare ever since.
Ben
Yes. So, but then we see flashbacks to the reunion that was four months, months before this. And Andy's like, so actually the season headlines erupted, erupting that you two were on the brink of divorce. You're living separate lives. Tell me how you're doing. Better than ever. Andy.
Ronnie
Yeah.
Ben
How many housewives are going to have to have these moments? Shannon bedor Kyle, all these housewives going on the reunion, saying that things have never been better. And three months later, the divorce. This is just. Just at a certain point, take care of the stuff before the reunion so you don't have to be mortified with these clips. Every single Season.
Ronnie
No, you got to fake it, you know? And then one is, you can only really say it's not working, right? When you decide to break up. The rest of the time, you're. You got to try and make it work, you know? I mean, it's just so funny watching people finally give their real opinion on their spouse all these years later, which is exactly what she's doing. She's just going to come here and air out everything, which I fucking love. But it's so funny. It's like, you know. And then he stopped drinking. Now it looks healthier, I guess. I mean, he looks like a dehydrated powder instead of just powder. Deflated pasty ass. Pk.
Ben
So what happened? What happened in. Since. In the four months since we were all together? Well, it's not one thing. No catastrophic events. Just. No one cheated on anyone. No one raided the marshmallows. It's just this week ago, there was a moment. It was over nothing. And one thing led to another. I was like, where's my yo play? And he said, what yo play? And I said, the one I just bought yesterday. He said, I don't know about the Yoplait. And he was gaslighting me. And we just sat down and I said, you know what? If we can't have honesty about a Yoplait, we just can't have a marriage. So we mutually decided it's time to take some space and separate. It's the best thing for us.
Ronnie
So temporary. You take it day by day. Well, I'll tell you who's taking it day by day. Picky. He's an alcoholic. What did he do about it? He's an alcoholic who's also into Godspell. Day by day. It is over and over again with that one. You're singing Christian musical theater numbers while you're drunk. Pk, don't drunk like that.
Ben
Just one big alcoholic. So Erica's like, well, don't take any advice from me, because I just did about everything wrong after announcing Alpha a divorce. Roll the clips, everyone.
Ronnie
And then we see her fighting with Sutton, and her saying, you got a lot of nerve, lady. Sutton, be like, don't talk to me like that. Or what? Or what?
Ben
So then Erica's basically saying that, yeah, like, Z's gonna go through all the same things that we went through, which is like, for a moment, like, mo. For a moment, it's like, ah, relief. And then it becomes a nightmare.
Ronnie
Yeah. And Dorian's like, you're the first person of two. And Erica Does a big long. Well, I gotta tell you the truth. I'm gonna go see Kyle after this. What do you want me to sell? Do you want me to tell her? Let's talk turkey. I'm not gonna betray your trust, Dorit. And she's like, I'd rather you didn't tell Coyle. Don't tell.
Ben
I want her to find out through radar online and so she can understand the true pain of being her friend. So Dorit is like, kyla's the one person in this group that I've shared the most about my issues with pk so it brings me great joy that I get to withhold from her at this moment. Revenge is so sweet.
Ronnie
So she's like, thank you so much for the endless support, Erica. She's like, of course.
Ben
Of course.
Ronnie
Because it's gonna get ugly. Then we go to Kyle's house, and Kyle is like, independent of the women. Throw your hands up at me. Well, it's the Morgan Wade version. So it's like, oh, all the river trout that are in the river, throw your fins up at me. So all the duckies from dynasties, show your whistles at me. So, yeah, she's like, I'm an independent woman now. Me and my daughter are carrying a chair in ourselves.
Ben
Yeah, they're trying to move a chair outside, but they have, like a. There's like a double door, and one of the doors is, like, kind of locked or closed, and they can't figure out how to open the door. So then they just give up. They don't. You know, it was kind of a sad moment. It was actually incredibly sad. These two people who've lived in this house for several years now, and they don't know how to open the actual literal door. They don't know how to open the door. So, like, oh, well, I guess we're just stuck with this chair being inside.
Ronnie
I was like, you know, now that things have really changed so much for me, I just want my daughter to, like, know that she can do things by herself. But why should she put the chair down? Let's not do that anymore. We'll hire somebody.
Ben
She's like, you know, Mo was living in this house with all women, and whenever something needed to be done, he was the only guy. And guys are the only thing. The only people who can do things. We're just women. I don't know how to turn the TV properly. And we see her trying to turn on the tv. I don't know how to get the music on the pool heater. The Pool light, Turn on the lights. Open drawers. What do you do? How do you even leave this place? How do the doors work? I'm just a woman.
Ronnie
Yeah, I mean, it's basically, you know. Yeah, that's. That's exactly what it is. So she's like, all right, so what do you want for dinner? And you want a Pokeball? Can you ask Sophia if that's okay with her? That's Sophia. Because I can't do it. There's not a man here. I don't know how to work this intercom. Sophia. Mom, that's a Diet Coke. Damn it, Portia.
Ben
Okay, write down what you want for dinner. We're going to scrawl it out on this bed sheet and hang it out the window. And hopefully someone driving by will be able to order it for us.
Ronnie
So Kyle gets teary and she's like, sometimes when Sophie is out and it's just portion me, it gets really quiet. She kind of cries, and then she's like, I realize it's going to be like this a lot. I just. I never expected that this is what my life is going to be. And she cries and she taps her eyes and she's like, hold please. Hold please.
Ben
Commercials.
Ronnie
Here comes one right now. Etsy knows these aren't the sounds of holiday gifting. Oh. Or ah. Okay, thank you.
Ben
Well, they're not the sounds you're hoping for.
Ronnie
You want squeals of delight like this.
Ben
Ooh.
Ronnie
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Ben
So DSW is taking care of the.
Ronnie
Details, like gifts to make their eyes all aglow. Styles that bring joy to your world. Brands everyone wants like Nike, Birkenstock and more. And deals to make your budget bright. Find the perfect shoes for you and yours at a DSW store near you.
Ben
Or dsw.com so then Erica, we go. Erica comes over and she goes, there's my girl.
Ronnie
Look at you.
Ben
God, it was so fun trying to figure watch you figure out how to use that doorknob for 10 minutes. You should really look into it, though. It's pretty basic.
Ronnie
Thanks so much for leaving that chair outside. You actually saved me a trip back to the Pacific Science Center. You dumb. Guess who's learned to carry things. Mikey, get that chair. All right.
Ben
So they're just sitting down, and Erica's like, well, I was just at the pacific design center, and I met. I met Ms. Dorit there. Kyle's like, oh, it's a shame that it's gone. We've gone this long with Dorit and me just because I just didn't have it in me to deal with it because I've had so many things on my plate, metaphorically, which is what I was kind of trying to say to her in that text that she read out loud where she destroyed my trust.
Ronnie
And, yeah, Kyle's, of course, going to be the huge victim of this because Dorit was nice to Kathy one time. So Kyle's like scorched earth. I was never even friends with Dorit. And so we see that with Kyle being like, I wasn't even friends with Dorit. I mean, doritos. Be honest, Dorit, how many times have we had lunch without filming? Like, how many times? Doreen's like, well, you and I over the last seven years. I mean, we don't eat lunch. That's not a fair question, Kyle. Now, how many times have we sat there and drank vodka while other people consumed food around us? And somebody said. I said, lunch, jury. And so Kyle said, how many times? You can count them on one hand. We don't even have that kind of friendship, you know? And that is what Kyle is in a nutshell. She will be pretend to be nice to you, and then she will use you to take down whoever she wants to take down. And once you're done doing that, in this case, it was vanderpump. And then she kept. She was nice to her for another couple years after that, and then she was out. You know, this was out. And then she's like, she never knew you before. You know, it's like, slam, bam, thank you, ma'am.
Ben
This was. This was such a shitty moment for Kyle. I forgot about this, how she really acted, like she and Dorit were just kind of like passing acquaintances who work together. And I just. I felt like it was so rude. And you could see the betrayal on Dorit's face. And Dorit was so hurt by this. And then Kyle. Kyle knows she's in the wrong, which is why she was trying to lean into this story of, like, what a betrayal of trust it was for Dorit to read her text on tv, and it's like, oh, please, please. It is so much worse for you to gaslight Dorit. And the audience into thinking you guys has only had lunch, like, one time over seven years. It is so. It is really so up. And I think it's so, so mean. And I'm just 100% team to read on this.
Ronnie
Yeah. And basically the text was because Kyle had been blowing dorit off for, like, months. But then right before the reunion, of course, she sends this nice, long text saying, I don't want to lose someone else in my life over a TV show. They don't even know we're going through a hard time, so I don't see the need to bring it up there. Basically being like, right before the reunion, being like, I know I've been a total you to read, but let's not. Don't attack me at the reunion because there's still a chance maybe you'll get to have lunch with me again one day if you're lucky. I'm that lady from Amazon live.
Ben
Also, like, how do you send a text saying, I don't want to lose another friendship to this sort of stuff, but then you go onto the couch and you say, oh, we're barely friends. Like, how do you have both? How do you have it both ways like that? You don't. It's just.
Ronnie
Yeah, well, in her mind, it was all revenge against this horrible stuff that Tariq did, which was nothing. Nothing. So Kyle is Carl's like, yeah. And then after she read my text, like, I was so shocked. I mean, she tried to publicly embarrass me. I don't know what kind of friend does that to somebody else, but not one of my other friends would ever, ever do something like that.
Ben
We all know you never public embarrass, publicly embarrass your friends. You only do that to your sisters. I just can't believe she would do that to me. So. So, yeah, Kyle is. She's doing this whole, like, public embarrassing thing. Kyle is like, I can't. You know what? I'm just.
Ronnie
By the way. You know? But by the way. Just this just popped in my head, the whole Lucy, Lucy apple juice thing. It turned into a total cluster fuck as the season went on. But let's all remember how that began. That began with Kyle and Teddy showing up to vanderpump dogs and trying to make it a storyline because they were mad that Lisa wouldn't throw dorit under the bus. So Kyle was there that whole time trying to make dorit look stupid. That was her whole point. That whole time was trying to make dorit look like a dog dog, you know? Dog killer. And she got mad that Vanderpump wouldn't do it. So that's how that all started. So for Kyle to sit up here and just be like, I would never try to embarrass one of my friends. That is horrible. When she was literally trying to call Dorit a dog killer, like, three years ago, it's like, come on, Kyle.
Ben
But they. Well, if I remember correctly, they claim that Vanderpump had called them over to throw Dorit under the bus. And then they decided they didn't want to do that because they felt like Vanderpump had.
Ronnie
Was.
Ben
Was. No.
Ronnie
They were there saying, why we need to talk about the stuff that happened with Zari. And Vanderpump was like, no, no, no, no. I don't want to talk about this. And they said, yeah, you talk about it. And then Vanderpump started crying and said, my brother just died. I don't want to talk about this. And Kyle said, we're all going through something, Lisa. And tried to make her talk about it on camera, and they wouldn't do it, and she wouldn't do it. And then they later turned it into. She tried to manipulate us to bring it up, and then she wouldn't talk about. But anyway, whatever it was, because bringing up Lucy, Lucy, apple juice, first of all, it's one of the worst story lines of all time. And second of all, it's just going to enrage people for no.
Ben
For no reason. But also, like, Kyle talk. But Kyle talking, regardless of even that scene, Kyle talking about how terrible it is that Dorit tried to publicly embarrass her when Kyle was very active in both trying to get Lisa Vanderpump to, like, admit that she, like, leaked this news. Because, by the way, it. If Lisa. If Lisa did. If Lisa did leak these headlines to radar online and you were one of Lisa's best friends, you trying to goad her into admitting that she did this shady thing on camera. That's called publicly embarrassing your friend. Because if it's your friend, you maybe tell them offline, like, you gotta fix this. But this is Kyle public publicly embarrassing your friend. It's also. Then the next season, literally everything with Brandy and Denise Richards. That is the peak definition of trying to embarrass a friend. Like, gay panic. Oh, my God. You had a lesbian moment with Brandy Glanville. I mean, there's no other definition of, like, trying to publicly embarrass someone. So that's just my way of saying Kyle is very wrong in this. In this situation. And she's gonna try it. She's gonna try it, but she's gonna fail.
Ronnie
Yeah. So now we see Dorit America flashback to them talking and saying, there's something been going on with Coil and I. It's been going on for a year and a half. A year and a heap. And Erica's like, do you think she's punishing you because he didn't take up for her the Kathy situation? And she's like, she isolated me. She's completely isolated, alone on any land, just me under it island.
Ben
My issues with Kyle is that our friendship feels very unbalanced, Convinced if I put one foot wrong, she won't speak to me for months, but she can say I do whatever she wants, and I have to be okay with it, which is.
Ronnie
And I'm no longer dealing with unbalanced people. Have you ever seen PK Try to put on a shoe? He falls over every time.
Ben
The worst is when he gets into some underwear and tries to do risky business in the living room. I mean, the amount of Ming vases we've had to replace, it's absolutely unthinkable.
Ronnie
It's literally risky.
Ben
We have a cutout in the wall the shape of PK because he slid right on through out into the driveway.
Ronnie
So, yeah. So then Dorit's like, what she did was punish me. And when she went public and said that, I exaggerated our friendship. And Erica goes on the Amazon live, like, of all places. And then we see doing Amazon live, and we see in the top left corner, celebrate my birthday. It's me on Amazon live. And she's like, yeah, we've only gone on, like, one trip together as a couple, and, like, that I can recall. And Mo and PK like, treat me, you know? I mean, it was just like. It was just like. To put it bluntly, it was like an exaggeration completely. Like, who is she? Like, what's her even? Is her name Dorothy? Is that why she just called her Eat? Like, who is this person?
Ben
I mean, anyone that knows us will say, say, wow. Gee, you guys seem like good friends. Well, you. You are definitely closer than I was, either one of you. And your family's a little closer, and your husbands are friends. You've made me reevaluate not only who you are, Coil, but what kind of friendship that we even had in the first place. So then we go back to Kyle.
Ronnie
And Harry, because that was.
Ben
Yeah, none Kyle punishes. That's. But that's what all the sisters do. That's what. What I Guarantee that is what it's like. Something went on. They were raised in this pit, pitted against each other, and they just punish each other. That's why people. That's why you have story lines of one not getting invited to a wedding and one not talking to another. It's why the three sisters never seem to be talking to each other all at once. Because someone is always being punished.
Ronnie
Constant punishment. Dun, dun dun. So then we see flashback to bravocon because Kyle's saying, Kyle's talking to Erica now. But we're back to Kyle and Erica, and Kyle's like, well, what I did was only in response to the way that I was treated. Like, I started the reunion with Kathy. Here's what really sealed the deal for me. It was bravo con. Sorry, Duri's pronunciation. So we go to BravoCon 2022. And this is kind. I'm sorry. She's just so full of it.
Ben
Here it comes. Smoking gun. It's a smoking gun. Flaming.
Ronnie
So it's Kyle and dorit and Andy ask some questions. And Andy says, rank the Richard sisters from your favorite to your least favorite. And then dorit starts to take a shot and ky goes, hello. And then she grabs her wrist making dorit spill her drink. And Dorit says, well, Kathy's definitely.
Ben
Kyle's definitely last, right?
Ronnie
She goes, kyle's definitely. It's like a joke now, cuz she spilled on me.
Ben
It's like a clear joke. She's like, oh, well, Kyle's last cuz because she got. Everything was spilled. And she's like. And Kathy is first, so. And then Kyle's laughing and now Kyle is using this as like, this is what quote unquote sealed the deal. The first. The. The deal that was initially written was just only because dorit at the reunion was like, kyle, I think what she's trying to say is like, that's like basically all she said. And Kyle's like, no, Dorit, stay out of it. You are going to just throw out a friendship because these two tiny incidences that are so dumb, it's infuriating. Wow. God, doesn't it feel nice to start, like, hitting on Kyle again? Weren't you going to be nice to her this season?
Ronnie
I am being. You're worse.
Ben
I know. I'm really. I'm really.
Ronnie
I know I'm not. I'm not really either, but it's hard because it's not really nice or mean. It's just. She's sitting here lying like she always does. She pulls this on people and then she Comes on here and starts crying and throwing a victim act, and now she's going to use an LGBT thing in a minute to guilt everybody into not being mean to her. You can't do that, Kyle. It does not work like that. Okay, I rebuke you. So then we cut back to Dorinda. Dorit confiding in Erica, and she's like, I'm pissed off. And then we come back to Kyle again, and Erica's like, well, you did have a sincere friendship, right? She's just mad. You guys have got to you. You guys have got to talk. And then Dorit's like, the Kyle I knew. She's not someone I even recognize, and I'm not talking about her new nose holes.
Ben
So then we go back to Kyle, and she's like, I do feel like she's changed. Kyle and dorit have a lot to work out, and it's a long time coming. And Kyle's like, if she starts talking and she talks and talks and talks and does. She doesn't want to listen. And that's when I lose it. Literally. Neither of you guys listen to each other. We've watched. It's hilarious.
Ronnie
So then Erica and Dorit. Erica's like, well, there's a lot of miscommunication. They kind of love this. Just me giving advice to people that I don't really give a shit about. This is the sweet spot of this show. And Dorit's like, there's more manipulation there than there is miscommunication. And I think she's more of a master manipulator than I even realized. Are you making that music? Give me the proper tense music. I want to make sure gets in there. If you got that, print it and roll it.
Ben
Can we borrow your fog machine? Eer. So, yes, Mike, you stay in the car market. We not gonna do choreography for an intrigue scene.
Ronnie
So g. Garcellest shuffle ball change I've ever seen in my life. Like mystery. Yes.
Ben
GSEL is over at the top Thompson hotel in Atlanta, Georgia, and she's trying to get her computer to work. And Oliver comes over, and she's like, oh, how was your flight? I ordered breakfast. He's like, oh, you know, busy, busy, busy. So basically, garcelle is in Atlanta. She's shooting a movie. It's another one in her abducted franchise. And she's also going to be starring in a movie. And she's just working. She's like a working lady right now. She's got all her together.
Ronnie
Yes. It's a lifetime Movie Abducted at an hbcu. A black girl Missing Movie. So, yeah, she's like, well, now I'm calling the shots. And so we see her having meetings at Lifetime, and she's like, wow, we got my director. I just wanted this man so bad. Professionally, of course. Oh, how's the director joke, everybody?
Ben
So, Oliver, how is OJ? He's like, oh, OJ's great. Starting kindergarten soon. So Oliver had, you know, his kid.
Ronnie
We're naming our children oj. Is that a thing that the people are doing? Are we. Are we okay with that? Everybody, like, that's just the thing we're going to do now is name our children. Children oj. I don't know that that's okay. Why would you do that to a child? You can be a fan of whoever you want. Why would you do that to your child?
Ben
So then, basically, they're just sort of having this conversation that's not terribly interesting. And Garcelle tells us that Oliver, when she had Oliver, she would bring him everywhere and, like, the set of the Jamie Foxx Show. And to have him here on the set here, it really means a lot to her.
Ronnie
Oh, well, you know, I'm sure he's just there to see you and not the camera at all. It's not. Your son's not very thirsty at all. So then, yeah, this Garcelle scene, I have to say, still love Garcelle. But I will say Garcelle should have come back as a friend. Garcelle should be there commenting on everything going on. That's her sweet spot. These personal scenes are not great, although it's good to see her kind of, you know, achieving her dreams and doing all this.
Ben
She's doing cool stuff. Like, Garcelle's, like, lovable. And, you know, she's. We see her. She goes. She, like, leaves the hotel. She goes to the set. She's like, yeah, I'm doing it. It sort of has a little bit of the energy of, like, a plaque psoriasis commercial. It's like, I'm not letting plaque psoriasis hold me back from shooting a movie. So wait a minute.
Ronnie
Someone's doing a psoriasis commercial without me? This is me, Cynthia Lapa. Psoriasis sucks. Don't get it.
Ben
Because, you know, like, every commercial for any sort of condition, it's always, like, someone talking to the camera while there's all sorts of business happening behind them. Like someone holding a bill, like, moving a bulletin board, and someone, like, rolling a wheel and someone training, like, a. Like an elephant, like I'm not letting it hold me back. Back to work for me. And they just, like, walk into the madness.
Ronnie
Yeah.
Ben
Oh, gosh.
Ronnie
So then we get some Trixie coming up. She's like, I love my life. I'm hooked on a feeling. I love my life. Every day is a weekend. It's like, well, you shouldn't say that when the whole scene is about somebody working a lot, because. Stay consistent. Tricks. So now it's Thursday, May 29th. No, May 19th. And it's 12:56pm and we know the exact time of day, which means it must be a terrible news coming up on the screen.
Ben
Yes, it's a timestamp. It's a timestamp. And the last timestamp of the episode, I believe. So if you're trying to keep track of the timeline of this episode, don't worry, you're off the hook because no more timestamps after this.
Ronnie
No more. We're done with those. So. Voiceover. Unfortunately, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills stars Dorit and PK separated after nine years of marriage. When we see headlines shooting up on the screen, Dorit Kemsley and P.K. kemsley breakup. Dorit breaks up with Kemsley and tries to cook him, not realizing he's still not a dough boy.
Ben
Peter Pan roll opens up in London after Dorit Kemsley pulls out a vital, vital pantone experience. So, yeah, all the headlines are hitting. And then we're at Dorit and PK's home, and now we see it's. We see. We see, like, the public statement that they make this big, long, long statement. And then certain parts are being highlighted, like, we can't work it out. Etc. And then we see Garcelle. Excuse me, Garcelle is reading it with. With Oliver, and she's like, all right, so we've had our struggles over the past few years, and, oh, my God, of course it's long winded. Of course it's to read. Okay, harmonious environment. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Okay, slide number. Wow. She did a whole character carousel. Okay, wow. Slide number nine. Oh, wow. God, I'm really resenting that Instagram opened up the carousels of 20 photos because we got a lot more. Okay. She's saying custody of the El Fudge cookies is yet to be determined. Okay, next. It's really going a while here.
Ronnie
This is very dirty. It's like we as a couple have been subjected to many, many, many boxes of Nabisco that have gone missing. And as we've tried to resolve this amongst Ourselves. As to who stolen the Nabisco, I continuously find crumbs in my bed suggesting that it was either me or Piqui. And if I won't harmoniously admit where the Nabisco is gone, what can I say about Nabisco?
Ben
I had always trusted PK but when I asked him, where do those strange orange crackers go with the peanut butter on the inside? And he said, what are you talking about? Those crackers don't exist. And then he came to bed with his lips as orange as orange can be. I thought, we've lost the trust. It's over.
Ronnie
We do appreciate the love and support of all of the fans all across the world and hope to do the weird, weird journey of support that we need to do for each other. Yada, yada, dada. Signed. And one more thing. When it comes to turkey basting, I am sick of being the baster every single year. Pastor O. Cookies, you monster of man. That is all said and done, Dorit. And furthermore, for Christ's sake, just stop using Siri to make your statement, girl. Just stop typing. Just say, I left the pasty old person. That's all we need to know.
Ben
So we then cut to erica, and she's FaceTiming Kyle, and she's like, well.
Ronnie
I'll be honest with you, Kyle. I knew.
Ben
I knew the whole time. I knew everything. I bet you didn't realize because I'm really good at acting like I didn't know something when I actually do. But guess what? I knew. And she told me at the Pacific Design center and asked me not to say anything, and I said nothing. I will rat out anyone, Kyle.
Ronnie
Not a single person.
Ben
But she did give me some diamond earrings, and I will not give them back.
Ronnie
What are we talking about? Oh, you know what? I just, like, this is so bad, and I feel so bad because, like, you know, to go through this publicly, like I've had to do, it's so difficult going through what I've gone through, and I don't want anybody to ever have to go. And I've gone through. So does he read even? Like, I have to go through what I've gone through. Except mine was worse, of course. It's just, like, so sad when I went through. Do you know what I mean?
Ben
I mean, I can only imagine how hard it would have been for them had they lasted 25 years and been featured on the not.com. luckily, they didn't have to go through that the way I did. And as the first person to ever be divorced in America, I have to say it is hard, but hopefully she'll get through it.
Ronnie
And she tells us. I just automatically go back to the couple that was just so in love. I mean, everything he said, she laughed at what went wrong.
Ben
So then a van honks, and Dorit drives through Bel Air, and this is the moment. She's. Dorit is, like, rage driving. She's like. She's free and doesn't know what to do. And she's, like, lighting up a cigarette. She's, like, smoking and Bel Air. Like, I'm singling a rebel now.
Ronnie
Yeah, she's smoking out the window. And Sutton's like, well, Teres said everything was wonderful with her marriage. Again, smoke and mirrors. And Garcelle's like, this is serious. There's something in the water. Who else married in this group? No one.
Ben
Now I know why Lisa Vanderpump got out of there. She's like, I'm going to save Ken. So then. So Dorit shows up at Kathy's house, and this is amazing. She's. She's walking through, and then she finds Kathy upstairs in, like, her preservation chamber. Kathy is, like, sitting in a chair. There are 10 different sets of hands applying plastic and goo and, like, different brushes and vacuums onto her face. It's not unlike the scene in seven where they come across that body in the bed that they think. That they think is decomposing and dead, and then it's alive.
Ronnie
It is like very Buffalo Bill from, you know, the Hannibal Lecter movie is just like, tell it to put on the lotion. Tell it to put on the lotion.
Ben
We've been keeping her alive for 200 years. She's like, I decided I actually want to be the picture of Dorian Gray. She's like, it doesn't work that way, Kathy. You're not supposed to be the picture.
Ronnie
So Tariq comes in and they kiss. Kiss. And Kathy's like, I'm not getting up. You're just gonna sit down there. Okay, well, I mean, listen. Hello there, Chris. And Chris, like, hi, honey. And so she's like, oh, I like this. I like this hair that you've got going on. That's at least good.
Ben
Gee, it's very ironic that Kyle has oysed me out and Kathy has thankfully offered support in my time of need. I mean, she didn't really offer support. She just looked at one of her glam people, and then they put a comforting hand on my shoulder for her. But it still felt nice.
Ronnie
I just called you honey because I want to see how you're feeling okay.
Ben
I appreciate that. And I can tell by the bubble that you're blowing through your lips that you mean it.
Ronnie
Mary. Buddy. I mean, Red, I. I just didn't want to call. I mean, I'd rather you do this in a person so you can. You know, he. Here wasn't. Are you okay? You depressed or going okay?
Ben
Well, you know, the really nice thing about this is it's not out of anger. And, you know, in order for us to have a healthy, happy, and peaceful marriage, there needs to be work done. Here, let me just dab that spittle that's coming out of the side of your lip. Thought these people were hired to do this for you. But that's okay. I'm just. I'm just divorcing. But that's okay. I'll wipe your spit off. Because you're richer than I am and more powerful. So there we go.
Ronnie
Yeah. I know you love him, honey. I know you love him. You love him, right? Don't you love him? He's a man. You're a woman. You know you love him, right?
Ben
Love is a strong word. More like I acknowledge that he exists.
Ronnie
Yeah. All right, we're gonna have to work on it. Is my face moving? You're all fired if my face is moving dirty. Is she.
Ben
Is she alive? I can't tell. It was someone just throwing her voice. I can't tell what's happening right now.
Ronnie
So then we go to the Henry, and Mauricio sitting at the bar, he's like, oh, yeah, I think I'll have a Henry special, whatever that is. I don't even care. I. I sell this sort of. So if you have maybe a waffle or something like.
Ben
A waffle?
Ronnie
Yeah, yeah, I'll have a waffle. And maybe possibly some syrup on the waffle and maybe on the waffle. Thank you.
Ben
Just so upsetting.
Ronnie
Said that we're going to be celebrating somebody else's. Yeah. The same day that we hear about our friends split. So upset setting. I know.
Ben
Gotta always gotta play at least once in the season. So funny.
Ronnie
So, no, he's actually making a business call. He's like, okay, okay. Deals, deals, deals. You know, nothing but deals. Go ahead and send me a bio on her if she would. You know, I'd love to see a bio. But, hey, I gotta go because my buddy's here and he's pastier than ever. Okay. Hey, buddy, you okay? And then they come up and they start making out. They're.
Ben
PK Is like, I'm not good, man. I'm not good. Okay.
Ronnie
You know what's funny? You actually taste like dough. That's crazy.
Ben
I've been rolling around in flower man trying to do flower therapy. It's a new thing. But I'm. It's rough. The other day, I. I said, ladies and gentlemen, Pearl out, not Berlin. It's a rough time over here.
Ronnie
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So then they start talking with their face. Like, maybe there's like a Starbucks cup in between them.
Ben
There's a shadow on decay. He's not well lit, right?
Ronnie
Yeah. They're like, hello, listen, I'm not doing well. I'm not doing well, mate. I'm just really not. He's like, well, you've been through a big day today. I've never been. You know, listen, I've been separated now nearly a year, and I recently moved out. And during this process, you're going to have hard days, you're going to have easier days. There's some days you'll get a boner, some days you won't get a boner. But let me tell you something. You have to have boners all the time because the girls are much younger now. It's crazy. Everybody in the world is now younger than anyone you ever lived with before. So I don't know how to explain it, but that's how it's going.
Ben
Yeah. He literally says, you know what? I've. I kind of learned how to enjoy the journey versus looking for a solution. How to enjoy the journey. I'm fucking everything inside now.
Ronnie
Yeah. Don't make anything right with my wife and just keep the young people that I'm getting now.
Ben
I realized rather than trying to have to have a nice relationship, I could just people. It's nice. I like it.
Ronnie
Yeah.
Ben
So crazy. PK is like, well, guess what? Kyle texted me. It was a beautiful text. And I'm like, wow. I. I love the game that Kyle and Dorit are playing right now. They are both playing such a passive aggressive, wonderful frenemy game. Doritos to Kathy first. And first of all, first retails Erica first before Kyle, which is already like a stab in the heart because Kyle's acting like they're not tight friends. So Dorit's gonna be like, oh, yeah, well, then I'm gonna call your bluff. And I. If we're not. If we're not close friends, I'm gonna tell it. Not only am I going to tell someone else first, then I'm gonna go confide in Kathy first. But Kyle's like, okay, well, I'm gonna one up you. You. Because I'm gonna text PK instead of you. I'm like, oh, this is brutal already.
Ronnie
And where it's like, oh, Kyle texted you? Wow, that's nice. He's like, you know, listen to me. You're really an inspiration to me, both you and Kyle. I mean, God, I love your divorce. I mean, you know, you may just look so fun. Haven't you. Everyone's doing it now, mate. And he's like, well, did you talk to the kids about it? He's like, no, we're not going to be talking to the kids. They're morons, basically. It's basically sludge. They're just sludge with hair, you know? I mean, they've basically just started actually walking around, you know, saying, dad, dad, dad, dad. It's stupid. Kids. Kids are moronic. No, we're not telling our children.
Ben
Listen, I'm British. We don't talk about these things for children. We wait 25 years and then we say, oh, oh, yes, I suppose we are divorced. Things like that. It's very simple. So Marisa's like, all right, well, did you leave a. Did you leave a note for Dorit on how to open doors and turn on TVs? Because I forgot to go with Kyle. So that's my tip for you.
Ronnie
So many watched a toaster yesterday. I said, how was your day? She started telling me the story about a bagel. I mean, it was the worst thing. Just make sure she knows how to turn on the tv. Trust me.
Ben
I got a voice note that said, quote, why is some of the bread missing from the bagel? And I had to tell her it's on purpose.
Ronnie
Actually, that was me. I stopped by, she invited me over. I don't think she'd catch me that quickly, actually. So he's like, no, we're not telling my moronic kids. And then we go to Kathy and Dorit. We're back with them. And Kathy's like, did you say anything to the kid? Yeah, kids. Right, right. You know, are they. Now, are they maids that you call kids, or are they actual kids that you have? Because sometimes I'll call my maids kids just to keep it simpler, you know? Like, America doesn't like me calling people ladies, and I just call them kids. It's pretty fun. So do you. Have you. Have you had kids, Suzanne?
Ben
Well, actually, instead of telling them about divorce, we've just sung Happy Birthday over and over and over to them.
Ronnie
Happy birthday to you Happy birthday to.
Ben
You're the soft clap. Just gonna go through all the sound effects guys, I'm just doing the morning show over here. I'm doing a crazy radio morning show.
Ronnie
We're back. Everybody pull out the trunk.
Ben
There's only one real sound effect that's left, so let's just get out of the way, young ladies. You know that makes me crack up every single time. So walking into the car dealership and screaming like bloody murder.
Ronnie
So Kathy's like, so you're not telling me the kids? I'm like, no, we're not going to. I mean, we can be doing things in the family. Like we're not in a toxic place. He does have a sober coach, and I'm not privy to that because I don't know if I told you, he's a full blown alcoholic.
Ben
Hold on one second. I'm getting a phone call. Yes. Yes. Full blown alcoholic. Thank you. Yes, in those words. Sorry, it was the skywriting team. What were you saying, Kathy?
Ronnie
So then back to Mauricio is, he's asking what happened? And P's like, I'll tell you what happened. I got sober. That's what happened. I got sober. I got clear, and I realized we're just taking bites out of each other the whole time. And I said, what are you, a bagel? And she said, yes, I. I am a bagel. And I said, God damn it, I'm divorcing a bagel. Then I had to talk to. To read after.
Ben
You know, she's not the most able to listen. She really isn't. Meanwhile, Mauricio sitting there, literally not paying attention to pk, he is looking at the door. He is looking at the waitress. He's looking at the other waitress. He is. This is a. This is a divorced man right here. That eye is wandering because PK is.
Ronnie
Also trying to make it like this big sob story. First of all, Mauricio's already heard all this. And second, Mauricio never really got his sob story because his thing was like, Kyle was like, Mauricio did something I'm not going to talk about, but I'm going to insinuate that it was an affair while she was kind of like screwing this chick off the Instagram. Allegedly. And so he got the villain at it, even though we don't really know what he did. Rumors are that he was getting messages from hoes on Instagram or something, and he wasn't. He wasn't swatting them off fast enough. That's kind of the rumor, but we don't. She made it sound like he had a full blown affair. So we still don't know what went on, but either way, he didn't get some sympathy at it. And now here comes pk. Pk, who's like a visibly terrible husband, like, literally not even in town, comes in, and he's going to try and have a crying scene. Now Mauricio's like, oh, no, this isn't fair. You know.
Ben
You know what, Kathy? Back to me. Pk, he's got avoidance issues. I put out some rice cakes on the counter. He wouldn't even touch them. Straight to the Pringles.
Ronnie
Have you ever tried to put a gallon of water there for a pasty person? They won't take it. Issues of avoidance. Yeah, but you also have an issue of being something truly needs to be avoided. To be fair, I'm not going to stick up for PK too much here, but you are still dorit. You know what I mean? You're going to have a hero season, and that's great. I'm rooting for you this whole season. But just gotta point out that, you know, if there's. If there's gonna be something to avoid, a lot of times it's you.
Ben
So Kathy's like, are you a good listener? What? Are you a good listener? Anyway, who got a beppo clothes, But. So that was sad, too. Did you not answer my question?
Ronnie
Why don't you ask one from the ceiling myself? What do you do with 19 boxes of lemons? PK saw those in my trunk and said we should have called it the eclair room.
Ben
So not a conditioner. Okay. So do you guys still have sex? You guys still got together? She's like, sex, Please. We're separated. I'm trying not to think about. I'm trying to put those memories in the main little box in my mind. Please don't bring that up, Kathy.
Ronnie
PK being inside of me is like trying to put biscuits gets back into a tube.
Ben
So Dorit's like, everything is all so fresh and new. It's so fresh and new. I have to. I have to splash invisible water drops across the room.
Ronnie
Flash, flash, flash.
Ben
It's all brand new, and it's scary. And do I. Do I think. Do I think I'm. Do I think it's gonna, I don't know, trail off? I'm trailing off right now. And Kathy's like, are you jealous if he goes out to dinner? God knows he does it all the time. He's a very social guy. I'm jealous of the people who. Who get to stay away from BK.
Ronnie
And Kathy really is very good at drilling right down to the issue. Right. Because she's like, yeah. So no. So he goes out. You don't go out. So you don't. He goes out. You're not out with your girlfriends all the time. It's like, no. So what we've just learned in this scene, thanks to Detective Kathy, is that PK is very social. Dorit has stopped being social and refuses to go out. And she's probably not listening to PK and they're not having sex. That was a very good interrogation for a show where people will not ever give the real information. You know what I mean?
Ben
Yeah.
Ronnie
People could keep secret on here for years. And Kathy just basically summed up every trouble with our marriage in two seconds while her mouth didn't even move. Yeah, Pretty good.
Ben
Hey, everyone, this is the end of part one of this recap for part two. Keep an eye on your podcast feed. It is coming up in just a moment. Thanks so much for listening. Catch you on the second half. Watch what crappins would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King it's always automatic with Ashley Auto.
Ronnie
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Ben
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Ronnie
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Ben
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Ronnie
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Some scotch with Jessica Trach she's our favorite streamer. Caroline Peacock, Kristen the Piston Anderson bringing the funk It's Leslie Plunk blanket she.
Ronnie
Gets a name from us it's Lindsay D. Let's give a kissarino to Lisalino Always killing it.
Ben
It's Lola Alcalani we love her on.
Ronnie
The rocks it's Melissa Cox, Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the burg.
Ben
Have a heck of a time with Rebecca.
Ronnie
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Ben
A spell with Shannon Spellman. The bay area and our super premium sponsors. Somebody get us 10cc's of Betsy MD.
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Ben
Let's get real with Caitlin O'Neal don't.
Ronnie
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Ben
Holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. We got our wish. It's Jen Plish she's not harsh She's Jill Hirsch She's a little bit loony Junie my favorite Myrtle Car Aaron McMurdo we love him madly It's Kyle Pod.
Ronnie
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Ben
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Ronnie
She ain't no shrinking violet couture we love you guys. If you like, watch what crap ins. You can listen ad free right now by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery App or on Apple Podcasts. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short survey@wondery.com survey.
Ben
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Ronnie
Bottle of Sriracha that's living in your fridge?
Ben
Or why nearly every house in America has at least one game of Monopoly? Introducing the best idea yet A brand new podcast about the surprising origin stories of the products you're obsessed with. Listen to the best idea yet on the Wonder App or wherever you get your podcasts.
Ronnie
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Ben
We bring to life some of the.
Ronnie
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Ben
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Ronnie
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Ben
You can join Wondery plus in the.
Ronnie
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Watch What Crappens – Episode #2626: RHOBH S1401 Part One: Hello, Dali!
Release Date: November 21, 2024 | Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam | Platform: Wondery
Introduction
In Episode #2626 of Watch What Crappens, hosts Ben Mandelker and Ronnie Karam dive deep into the premiere of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Season 14, aptly titled "Hello, Dali!" This episode unpacks the latest drama, character developments, and plot twists, providing listeners with a comprehensive analysis of the season's kickoff.
Season 14 Premiere Overview
The hosts begin by expressing their excitement about the new season, highlighting the heightened drama and intensified interactions among the cast members.
Ronnie (03:22): Welcomes the audience back, expressing nostalgia and enthusiasm for the show's return. "Real Housewives of Beverly Hills day. I've missed this show. I love this show. I'm so glad it's back on my telly."
Ben (04:18): Notes the increased popularity and renewed energy in the premiere. "Beverly Hills has been a little kind of polite and stayed over the past seven years or so... I think they took some lessons from Salt Lake City and they really amped up the ridiculousness of it."
Key Plot Points and Character Dynamics
The episode delves into the central conflicts and relationships shaping Season 14.
Dorit and PK's Marital Struggles
Separation and Divorce:
The hosts discuss the unraveling marriage of Dorit Kemsley and her husband, PK Kemsley. They analyze the factors leading to their separation, including PK's alcoholism and communication issues.
Ben (09:37): "Cal Mauricio are living separate lives under the same roof."
Ronnie (24:15): Criticizes Kyle's treatment of Dorit, emphasizing Kyle's manipulative behavior.
PK's Alcoholism:
PK's drinking problem is highlighted as a significant strain on the marriage. The hosts examine his inability to manage his alcoholism despite Dorit's interventions.
Ronnie (35:17): "Pk is an alcoholic who's also into Godspell. Day by day. It is over and over again with that one."
Kyle's Manipulative Tactics
Friendship Betrayal:
Kyle is portrayed as manipulative, using friendships to undermine others and further her agenda within the group.
Ben (25:21): "Real great moment. So basically, son’s like, yeah, at first it was awkward for the first 10 minutes..."
Ronnie (47:14): "It's so funny watching people finally give their real opinion on their spouse all these years later, which is exactly what she's doing."
Public Embarrassment:
Kyle publicly humiliates Dorit by revealing a text meant to address personal issues privately, showcasing her lack of loyalty.
Ben (47:57): "It's like, how do you have it both ways? You don't. It's just..."
Ronnie (48:16): "We all know you never public embarrass your friends. You only do that to your sisters."
New Cast Members and Subplots
Jennifer Tilly as Sutton:
The addition of Jennifer Tilly brings fresh dynamics to the season. Her interactions with existing cast members, especially Dodit, are examined for potential conflicts and alliances.
Ben (14:28): "She's like, oh, I love your ring. He's got a mouth of pearl."
Ronnie (19:21): "Because Porter graduated from college, and then, you know, the other one's going to law school..."
Erica's Artistic Pursuits:
Erica's commitment to her artistic endeavors is discussed, highlighting her determination despite budget constraints.
Ben (32:32): "Erica is redecorating because she's going to purge some old memories in the form of sofas and chairs."
Garcelle's Career Moves:
Garcelle's professional advancements and her role within the group are analyzed, noting her supportive presence amidst the chaos.
Ronnie (57:27): "Garcelle should have come back as a friend. Garcelle should be there commenting on everything going on."
Notable Moments and Quotes
Throughout the episode, several moments stand out, capturing the essence of the season's drama:
Dorit's Rage and Independence:
Dorit's anger and attempts to assert her independence post-separation are focal points.
Ronnie (65:41): "She's free and doesn't know what to do. And she's lighting up a cigarette. She's like, smoking out the window. She's singling a rebel now."
Emotional Confrontations:
The hosts highlight intense confrontations between cast members, emphasizing the emotional toll of their disputes.
Ben (56:12): "Dorit confiding in Erica, and she's like, I'm pissed off."
Humorous Interjections:
Amidst the drama, the hosts intersperse humor, keeping the analysis engaging and entertaining.
Ronnie (63:02): "That's why you don't let your children become actors, okay?"
Ben (70:20): "It's very simple. So Marisa's like..."
Host Insights and Analysis
Ben and Ronnie provide their perspectives on the unfolding drama, critiquing character actions and predicting future conflicts.
Team Dorit Sentiments:
The hosts rally in support of Dorit, condemning Kyle's manipulative tactics and emphasizing the unfairness of Kyle's public betrayal.
Ronnie (46:28): "I can only imagine how hard it would have been for them had they lasted 25 years and been featured on the show."
Character Predictions:
Speculations about upcoming alliances and rivalries are made, forecasting potential storylines based on current interactions.
Ben (24:58): "Sutton's gonna be a hot commodity this season because I guarantee Dorit and Kyle are going to be battling to have her as their ally."
Conclusions and Final Thoughts
As the episode wraps up, Ben and Ronnie summarize the key takeaways from the premiere, setting the stage for the ensuing drama in Season 14.
Ben (79:35): "Hey, everyone, this is the end of part one of this recap for part two. Keep an eye on your podcast feed. It is coming up in just a moment."
Ronnie (81:19): Reinforces her support for Dorit and anticipates the escalating tensions among the cast.
Final Remarks
Watch What Crappens Episode #2626 offers a thorough and entertaining breakdown of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Season 14 premiere. Hosts Ben Mandelker and Ronnie Karam adeptly navigate through the intricate web of relationships, conflicts, and character developments, providing listeners with insightful commentary peppered with humor and candid opinions. Whether you're a die-hard fan or new to the series, this episode equips you with all the necessary context and analysis to stay engaged with the unfolding drama of RHOBH.
Notable Quotes:
Ronnie (03:22): "Real Housewives of Beverly Hills day. I've missed this show. I love this show."
Ben (09:37): "Cal Mauricio are living separate lives under the same roof."
Ronnie (24:15): "You did all the right, better friend to Kyle than Kyle was to her."
Ben (47:57): "It's like, how do you have it both ways? You don't."
Ronnie (48:16): "We all know you never public embarrass your friends. You only do that to your sisters."
Ben (56:12): "Dorit confiding in Erica, and she's like, I'm pissed off."
Ronnie (63:02): "That's why you don't let your children become actors, okay?"
Note: The timestamps correspond to the moments in the provided transcript where these quotes occur.