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Ronnie
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Ronnie
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Ben
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Ronnie
This episode is sponsored by Door Dash.
Ben
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Ronnie
And honestly, there's so much to watch on Max from True Detective, the Last of Us succession. There's really so much that I would want to watch while I have my Door Dash Deliver Me Stay stuff.
Ben
I love watching True Detective and I actually haven't seen the Jody Foster season, so I'm starting that tonight. I'm so excited to get into that.
Ronnie
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Ronnie
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Ben
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Ronnie
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Ben
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Ronnie
Orwell's 1984 and Percival Everett's brilliantly subversive James Audible.
Ben
There's more to imagine when you listen.
Ronnie
I actually am really excited to hear George Orwell's 1984 again because I last time I read that was back in, I don't know, middle school or something like that. And the world has changed so much with technology and everything like that. I feel like now is the perfect time to revisit and listen to it on audible.
Ben
Especially when it's told by a full cast like that, like it's a full production. It's going to be like a radio play, you know, that's major. Go to audible.com crappens and discover all the years best waiting for you. That's audible.com crappins.
Ronnie
Who cares what happens when there's so much that crappens?
Ben
Hello and welcome to Watch what Crappens, the podcast for all the crap we love to talk about on Yeh Bras. Welcome, everybody. I'm Ronnie and that's Ben over there. Hello, Britain.
Ronnie
Hi, Ronnie. How's it going?
Ben
Good, everybody. Thanks so much for being here. Welcome to Below Deck Sailing Day. We have just announced Dallas, Texas, tickets for our tour, our Mounting Hysteria tour, which begins January in San Francisco. So go get your tickets because guess why. There's also the Golden Crappies, our yearly awards show for all things Bravo on Broadway this year in New York City. City. That's going to be so amazing. All of the shows are going to be great. We're so excited to be back on the road. They are a really fun experience. You guys go check it out. Get the schedule over at Watch what Crappens. Also, we're on video as usual. You can find all of our daily videos over on patreon.com if you don't mind waiting a week, you can get them for free over on YouTube. We ain't here to rob you. Also, bonus episodes right now are sold on SLC Recaps, which is a hilarious new show on Bravo that we are covering exclusively on Patreon. So go check that out. Ben, how has your morning been?
Ronnie
Well, it's been a tremendous morning because we went onto the Jeff Lewis show on Radio Andy. We had such a fun time and we reunited with Leah Black and she is such a riot. The things that she says, the observations she makes, just hilarious. So thanks once again to Jeff, Shane, et cetera, the whole gang over there for having us back. And it was just wonderful. And I got to be with you, most importantly in person. And you got me a quason. You know, I was on that Jeff Lewis show, really gave me a croissant. You know what? All I need is a croissant. And I will pretty much always like you, like Bryn Whitfield. That's all you have to do. So tldr, great morning so far. How's your morning?
Ben
Super fun morning. Yeah, fun seeing Leah Black.
Ronnie
Leah Black.
Ben
It's been A while. So it's good to see her. I'm going to go see her a little bit later. And always good to see Jeff and Shane. They're such nice guys. They're so nice to us. My God. Which is so, you know, nice.
Ronnie
They are such mensches. I mean, Jeff really promoted the golden crappies, like, above and beyond, which was really so kind and, you know, he didn't have to do that. That was really cool.
Ben
Yeah, super nice. Love them. Go check them out on Sirius XM and let's get on with the recap. Here we are on previously on Blue Dig Sailing Yach.
Ronnie
Previously. Gary was drunk and Chase is on the boot. That's basically it. And there's a lady named Ronnie who, unlike our Ronnie, she is awful. And she got stung by a jellyfish, which shows that nature. There is karma in nature. And she should have been stung because she was terrible about her coffee. And she continues to be terrible this episode.
Ben
And then Daisy outed Danny for, you know, having a high body count, as they would say on slc. So we are on second day of charter and we're in Ibiza, and Glenn is still all about Rani's jellyfish sting. Personally, I hope that jellyfish was like Rani and swam away and was like, could have been better. That definitely could have tasted better. Really not great.
Ronnie
Could have been better.
Ben
Yeah, it could have been better. New York Rock. Was it great? No. Was it. Was it good?
Ronnie
No.
Ben
Was it terrible? No, but it could have been better.
Ronnie
Could have been better. Could have been a better leg to sting. You know, when I sting a leg, I want it to feel like it's good. You know, it's like I want to do an A plus effort. It was just like an okay leg.
Ben
It was an okay leg. It's the jellyfish version of Bethenny Frankel. You know what? I've had better stings. That's it. You know, I've tried different legs. I've had better stings. That one, it wasn't so good. I'm so sorry. If you. If you don't want a bad review, don't send me a leg. Okay?
Ronnie
You know what? It's business. It's nothing personal, but sometimes you got to take a sting off the market if it's not ready yet. Okay, we know one of our listeners, one of my. My friend. My. My dear friend Justin. He just got stung by a jellyfish yesterday, and he posted it on his story. And he was in Thailand and he's just sitting on the beach.
Ben
It's yes.
Ronnie
You know, Justinian Wang. So he. Oh, everyone buy his book. But he got sung by jellyfish. And he's has a video of himself sitting there pouring stuff on it. And it looks dreadful, but not gonna. Not gonna lie. It's kind of a fun story.
Ben
Jellyfish are little bitches. No, I didn't see it, but they are. They're. They're little bitches.
Ronnie
So it's like. It's like. You know what? It's, like, not fair that you, like, you literally have no brain. You do nothing. You have no reactions. You just literally float there. And yet you're also pa. Painful. Like, that's not fair. Like, be painful, but also have a personality.
Ben
Yeah, exactly. Of course. Yes.
Ronnie
Like, do something for it. Like a shark, you know, like, a shark will bite you. It could kill you, but at least it has, like, eyes and a face and is menacing. Like, it can make a cartoon character out of it.
Ben
You know what I mean? Yeah. Like, they can draw a shark and be like, oh, this shark has this personality. That one. Like, a jellyfish is just like a blobby, spineless thing. Like, it's literally just like a plastic bag floating in the water that can really fuck you up. And it just seems unfair. You're a bubble spit. You know what I mean? Yeah.
Ronnie
And, like, no one's trying to get you. Like, you're just floating and literally nobody. To a jellyfish, you are, like, literally invisible. And then you get mad when we run into you. Like, get it together. Grow up.
Ben
Yeah, stop floating. Like, you can't get mad if you're just like, flop.
Ronnie
Like, yeah, you're putting zero effort into your existence in the ocean. And then you get mad when someone is actively kicking and trying to go somewhere. And then you're like, wait, no, stop. I'm floating here. No, you don't get to do that, Jellyfish.
Ben
And it's like, suddenly you have arm strength. You know what I mean? Because you know that if you ever needed to move, the jellyfish would be like, I'm just a jellyfish. Look, I can't move. I. Like, I literally can't pick up anything. But then once there's a person nearby, they're like, oh, yeah, fa. Boom. And suddenly they're the fucking Karate Kid.
Ronnie
Suddenly it's like, hey, jellyfish, why'd you do that? Sorry, I can't answer. I don't have really a brain or a mouth or eyes. But you have enough of, like, a brain to sting people. It's like, well, sorry, that's just what I do.
Ben
And, you know, it tries to answer all of the Jeopardy. Questions while you're watching it with them, like, oh, shut up. I thought you didn't have a brain, you know? And you're always wrong.
Ronnie
Every answer is not Keira Knightley. Why do you keep saying Keira Knightley like she was not a founding father. Why do you keep answering that?
Ben
Yeah, and you're like. You're just desperate because you want to have Keira Knightley in a question. Is it Kieran Keira Knightley. Wait. Oh, no. You have to answer it in an answer, right? No, you have to.
Ronnie
Who is Keira Knightley? It's like, it got it right.
Ben
Who is Keira Knightley? Right? Will Keira Knightley ever call me? No. Stop asking random questions. Watching. That's not even the proper form of the question.
Ronnie
Okay, you got it right on one. On one. One answer said, star of Bend it Like Beckham and later Pirates of the Caribbean, and you're like, Keira Knightley. And now you think that's the answer to everything. It's like, you can't just keep floating through Jeopardy. The way you float through the ocean. It doesn't.
Ben
And then even when you answer Keira Knightley to, like, the. To a math question at the end, you go, oh, I would have gotten that. That was my last. That was my next. That was my next answer.
Ronnie
Pythagorean theorem was gonna be my next answer. Shut up, jellyfish.
Ben
It was jellyfish. Like, I've had it with jellyfish. Fuck off. Shut up. Stop your bitching and hurt people. Hurt people. Okay, I get it. Who hurt you, jellyfish? Okay, I know people on this show because I went through bullying. Who bullied you, you spineless little fool?
Ronnie
And by the way, you literally are spineless. And by the way, to the Portuguese man of war, you're just a fucking jellyfish. Also, don't try to be all fancy with your Portuguese man of war.
Ben
No, at least he' trying with a personality, though, because he's. He's a man of war, you know?
Ronnie
But a little, like, toxic masculinity there. I would. I'd like to add.
Ben
Speaking of, can we please stop gendering war? Because, yeah, those fish. Person of war, they didn't choose. Yeah, seriously, how about your.
Ronnie
How about your geographic origins don't really matter because you're for war and we are not for war.
Ben
Yeah, we're pacifists, you fucking stupid war fish.
Ronnie
That being said, jellyfish, great aim on Ranni. Great aim on Rani.
Ben
Yeah, you know what? Even A broken clock. Broken clocks, et cetera. Okay, so Daisy's apologizing for outing Dany as, you know, hitting on everybody. I guess I should say so. She's like, sorry, I shouldn't have said, Nathan, try not to get offended. All right, then. And she's like, well, I've kind of learned that with this crew in general, even if you're offended, just shut the fuck up anyway. Right, right, right. Poor victim Danny. Poor, poor victim Danny.
Ronnie
But by the way, that's what a funny turn of phrase that Daisy says. Daisy basically comes in is like, oh, well, you know about Danny. She pretty much slept with everyone, including a child from the club. Sorry, Donnie. Try not to get too offended. Try not like you, I love. Try not to get too offended.
Ben
Listen, you want to date Danny, you're gonna need an app to rent her for a bit. It's just like the town bikes. You just put her back when. Just leave it in the street, someone will eventually pick it up. Like, wait a minute, is she a lime scooter? My God.
Ronnie
Try not to get too offended, Dani. Sorry, I shouldn't have said that. Try not to get too offended.
Ben
It's not her fault for being an asshole. It's Dani's fault for always getting offended. So she's like, well, we've got two more weeks and we need to try to enjoy each other. And Dani's, of course, hurt. And she's like, she's just always finding a way to shit on me.
Ronnie
Well, stop acting like a toilet. So then we go to a flashback of Daisy. Basically Daisy calling out Danny for stringing Keith along. And then Daisy begging Danny to work while she's floating with Gary. By the way, Daisy going up to Danny while she's flirting with Gary and said, donnie, we really need your help right now. That is not finding a way to on you. That's your boss saying, what's your boss telling you?
Ben
You know, if you got time to flirt, you got time to squirt, okay? Now grab some Windex and get over there.
Ronnie
Squirt that Windex. If you've got. If you've got time to schmooze, you've got polish to lose. As in, lose that polish out of the container and put it on the silverware.
Ben
I got it.
Ronnie
So miss me with that polish.
Ben
So now she sends Ron a three hour break. Okay? So then we go to the swim platform, and everyone's still gathered around Rani secretly cheering on that jellyfish.
Ronnie
Jellyfish.
Ben
And then Daisy and Glenn are discussing the schedule. And then, oh, then we find out that there's this boat procession thing that Captain Glenn really wants him on. He's like, the procession is an 8. Is it 8:15? We should. We should go in the Tinder and.
Ronnie
Have a look around.
Ben
We'll do dinner. I mean, they're going to love it. They're going to love it. I personally love the procession. Cut to Captain Glenn in an Afro in a black and white.
Ronnie
When I was in the 70s, I would love to go to processions. I would sit in that cave and watch the boats go by. It was wonderful.
Ben
So then, let's see. The guests have requested midnight snacks. So we know it's going to be a long night because this is an Ibiza charter, so they're going to have to deal with people trying to pretend they're not turning 50, which my friends are doing it every year now. And it just ends awkwardly every single time. Like, why are we doing this? Nobody wants to be out until 6 in the morning. Why are we pretending we want this? You know, I was pretty.
Ronnie
I honestly was proud of these women. They really. They really turned up. You know what? They came back late. But we'll get to that. Also, as soon as Glenn says these guys requested midnight snacks, of course, that is like, a red flag. Anyone who watches below deck knows the moment that midnight snacks are called out is the moment that midnight snacks will not be prepared. So I was actually shocked later on when there were, like, a huge amount of midnight snacks. I was like, what? What's happening with this season? This is wrong. Jump the shark.
Ben
So then Diana is opening a bottle of tequila or something, and Chase passes by her and just reminds us how annoying he is. He's like, hey, you're awesome. We love you. We love you here. Doing great. Go away.
Ronnie
She's like, uncle Tripping. And then Gary, she. You know, Diana has her trademark sparkling personality, being like, thank you so much. So then Daisy sees Gary and she's like, gara, obviously, the primary had a shock of a birthday. Maybe you could do something stupid to make them laugh. Like kind of clown sketch or something. Just sort of stand in front of them and they'll just laugh at you. How about that, Gara?
Ben
I was naive that I get blackout drunk and have sex and then apologize the next day because I don't remember a thing.
Ronnie
All right, that could probably work, too. So then Gary basically tells Keith that they're going to be doing some sort of skit. And Keith is like, keith, come. He's like, what about like a jellyfish reenactment? Or something like a comedy skit. And this segues into some very uninteresting but notable backstory for Keith.
Ben
How dare you call this uninteresting? This is meaning that, like, backstory.
Ronnie
No, it's good. But it's like. It's because. It's. Because it's Keith. It's like inherently bland, you know, it's like. Yeah, but it's like. It's like the most exciting his backstory can be. But it's still ultimately a Keith backstory.
Ben
Yeah, well, he's like, well, I can't sing and dance well, but I ended up doing high school's musical, and I do musical from high school rather sorry. And I'd call it a brief soiree into song and dance. And then we see shots of him. He played Abraham Lincoln. He played Johnny from Dirty Dancing. I mean, you guys, this guy has had a very varied career. His IMDb is huge.
Ronnie
Yeah. And every image of him is like every image you see in your yearbook of people in the drama club where they're like, trauma club. And you see them, like, you know, posing. They have a mustache on or like a monocle.
Ben
And you know why he's, like, bored of drama queens. Doesn't it explain a lot? Like, he doesn't fall for Danny shit. Because he's been with drama queens. He's a theater kid, ultimately. I mean. And you know, a straight guy in theater is crazy, right? And I mean, in high school it's less crazy, but they get a lot of. They get a lot of vajayjay because there's not. There's a lot of gays, you know, and so when you find a straight, you jump on it. Even the gays do. Even we do, you know, so. Yeah, and he's used to the drama queens and that's why he is immune to Danny's bullshit, which I think it was a very, very explanatory segment for sure.
Ronnie
Yeah. And he talks about how basically like the. The. The drama club parties, the cast parties, etc, and he was like, people would be singing and, you know, they'd be dancing. And it wasn't like orgy debauchery, but it was like one quarter orgy, mainly just me. It was like an orgy, for one. Is that still an orgy? That's what I had. Well, I. It was. I was the only one in the orgy, but I played different roles, so it was sort of still like an orgy because I was performing. It's like a one man play.
Ben
So one man Oklahoma, if you will. My one man death of a salesman really, really brought down the house.
Ronnie
It turns out the the cowman and the farmer can be friends in an orgy.
Ben
So he's like, well, maybe somebody got a hen job, you know? So then Daisy's like, well, we can do that after dinner. But I love that idea. I love that. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappens commercial.
Ronnie
Hey, prime members, have you heard?
Ben
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Ronnie
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Ben
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Ronnie
To start listening, download the Amazon music app for free or go to Amazon.com adfreepodcast that's Amazon.com adfreepodcast to catch up on the latest episodes without the ads.
Ben
Thumbtack presents the ins and outs of.
Ronnie
Caring for your home.
Ben
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Ronnie
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Ben
Out carpet in the bathroom.
Ronnie
Like, why? In knowing what to do, when to do it, and who to hire.
Ben
Start caring for your home with confidence. Download Thumbtack today. So then we go over to David in the galley, and he's like, clajs Glaiz, what are you doing about pizza making? I'm Italian. You're making pizza. And course it's like when they get back from the club, they want pizza. Bloody hell. Fresh pizza for five in the morning. Crazy. I'm Italian.
Ronnie
I mean, asking an Italian if they want to make a pizza. Let's say guessing if this guy is blue is the sky blue as the tree, green is the meatball red? Of course I know how to make a pizza.
Ben
And Chloe is like, so do you guys have, like, your own style of pizza? He's like, oh, yeah. Not literally. It's like a thicker dough.
Ronnie
It's like, Davide, why are you having sex with your pizza dough right now? Oh, you know, I got the Mari, do it.
Ben
I'm open. I'm open. Men, women, hair, blow dryers, dough, pizza dough, whatever it takes.
Ronnie
A dear. She's my dear. So meanwhile, Danny and Diana are discussing the night's schedule.
Ben
I've done that show. Sorry, I was Rolf. Sorry, that was. That was a different one.
Ronnie
I was all the children. Actually, I was. I had a lot of quick changes.
Ben
I was wrong. So, yeah, Ralph always gets laid. I've done Sound of Music so many times. Probably like three times. I was gonna say four. I think three times. I've done it every single time Rolf got laid. Well, except one time in high school. I wasn't at the high school, but I was at high school age. It was at the community theater. So there were kids in it, you know, because of Sound of Music. And Ralph and Liesel were brother and sister in real life, but everyone still thought they were fucking. How fucked up is that? Yeah, I still think they were. I wouldn't be surprised.
Ronnie
These are a few of my favorite things. These are really a few of my favorite things. These stories.
Ben
Incest and incest. And incest. And incest. It's just all incest.
Ronnie
Sisters in Brawlers, Sleeping in the Attic.
Ben
Literally every single thing on the list is incest. Incest. And incest. And incest. And incest. Incest. The guys is getting a little repetitive. Well, have another sibling for me then.
Ronnie
Listen, it's a first draft. So that was the original version of the song.
Ben
You've got two sisters. Why do you always have to sing about that one? All right, Mom, I'll change it up. Incest and incest. I guess that was my bad. It's still incest, isn't it? All right.
Ronnie
Well, may I try it? Pizza dough and pizza dough and pizza dough and pizza dough.
Ben
I had sex one time with a pepperoni pizza. Who is brothers with a pepperoni pizza? And we all did a threesome. Incest and incest and pizza. I'm incest. You found a way to switch it up, mate. Good for you.
Ronnie
I did have sex with a brown pep. Brown package with tide wasn't one of the favorite things Like a brown package.
Ben
And tied up with string? What a low brown paper package is tied up in string.
Ronnie
That was a low bar. What a low bar to be a favorite thing.
Ben
I mean, crisp strudels was good.
Ronnie
That's great. Raindrops and roses. Fine little whimsical, but brown paper packages tied up in string.
Ben
Whiskers on is good. Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens. Sleigh bells.
Ronnie
She's like, oh, yeah.
Ben
These are a few of those things that I masturbate over. Brown paper packages. Instruments and incest.
Ronnie
Is there a pizza dough in the brown pepper packages?
Ben
Literally everybody has turned this off. And I love jellyfish. I love it for you guys. Okay, so I'll tell you who does.
Ronnie
Not have a favorite thing is jellyfish. They're like, I don't know, Legs, Legs.
Ben
Random legs just like legs. That's their whole thing. No one really on this show can make a good multi lyric song for that version of that song. Okay, so legs and legs and legs and legs legs. They're very one track. Come on.
Ronnie
It's like, Gary, you have to name something. He's like, well my favorite thing is blah, blah, blah.
Ben
I'm sorry, 12 of my favorite. So in crew mess, Danny and Diana are discussing the night's schedule with Daisy. So Diana's like, so you have three hours of break? No. She's like, yeah, cuz I'm going to be awake till 5 until they get back in at least. So I have to stay up till 5. So Daisy, am I correct in saying I have to stay up till 5? And she's like, no, you'll probably be down about 2. And then Diana, you can go up at 5 serving snacks. And then when I get off, you go back to bed. And she's like, but you just got three hour break.
Ronnie
So Diana's complaining that Daisy got a three hour break or that Danny just.
Ben
Had a three hour break. Danny just.
Ronnie
She's complaining. She's complaining that Danny got a three hour break and then gets to be off work early at 2am, right? Is that what, is that what I'm to gather from this?
Ben
Yes. She's mad that she has to, she has to wake up early in the morning to serve them at five in the morning when she didn't get the three hour break like Danny.
Ronnie
Right. And Daisy's like, well Diana's reaction's really over the top. I've worked seasons where I've had five hours of sleep the whole season. I love, I love Daisy saying that Diana's over the top. And she's like, I spent six weeks sleeping one minute a day. One minute.
Ben
I literally, literally built this boat with these hands.
Ronnie
I didn't go to sleep the entire time. Just spent six weeks doing crack cocaine every single day until I got the job done. So stop trying to exaggerate things.
Ben
So they're like, I got to the position I'm in now by doing what I was told with a smile on my face. You did not. There is no proof of that. I don't think there's a witness in history who would say, you know, do you remember working with Daisy on that boat? God. Remember how she just smiled and did everything without a complaint?
Ronnie
Oh, you mean. I like to call her smile on her face Daisy. Of course, yes.
Ben
Smile on her face Daisy. Daisy. She's like, these girls aren't gonna progress in yachting. They're not gonna progress in any of their careers if they don't adjust their Attitude.
Ronnie
If you got. If you got time for a break, you got time to take plates off the table.
Ben
If you've got time for a peep, you don't need time to sleep. That's what I say. Now it's pizza making. And they're doing great Debbie days.
Ronnie
They're doing great.
Ben
Car Alarm. Really? In 2024, are we still doing that?
Ronnie
Well, it's the most useful piece of technology. Think of all.
Ben
I know.
Ronnie
Think of all the cars that have been saved from being stolen by car alarms.
Ben
Think of how many cars have had baseball bats taken to them just because the car alarm went off and people were like, off. I've had it with you. I'm not in.
Ronnie
So Daisy is gonna go take a drink order. So meanwhile, Diana and Danny are gonna complain. Diana's like, tomorrow I'm going to be tired. I'm annoyed. Like, I've been working for three hours straight.
Ben
Oh, yeah.
Ronnie
Three hours straight. I'm so sorry that you worked for three hours straight. That must be so hard on you. I'm so sorry that you had to go through that. Diana. Diana, you know, because Danny is such a brat and has taken up most of, like, the attention for the season, we really haven't had enough time to just like on Diana. But Diana's really worked her way up. Diana's made shitty drinks. And then she complains that she doesn't get put on drink service. And then when she's given the opportunity to improve her drinks, she does. She makes one drink. She's, like, a little too much for me. And she has kind of a shitty attitude around the boat in general. And I'm shy. It's like, no, you've got a shitty attitude. And now you're complaining that you've worked for three hours straight. You know what? Enough.
Ben
Yeah. But, you know, I think it's rough to hear that the person that you like is being making out with somebody else or flirting with somebody else. And then that person gets three hour breaks, you know, I mean, I know they all kind of get three hour breaks, but sometimes I'm on her side. But then other times. Yeah, other times I'm on her side.
Ronnie
I'm generally on her side, but also like, like, better people, too. Like, you wouldn't be in this situation if you had a higher standard than Chase.
Ben
Yeah, exactly. So then she's all pissy. And then Daisy is now talking to Cloyes about lemon sorbet we made to make tiki laloches while Keith. And then Keith is asking Sarah about The jellyfish thing. And she's like, I'm still gonna dance, baby. I'm Sarah. Just because I'm 50 doesn't mean I'll not dance after a jellyfish swing. A sweet sting. Those jellyfish girls. I'm back and I'm 50. 50 years old.
Ronnie
I'm 50. So Daisy is in her cabin.
Ben
I get stung and then I kick.
Ronnie
You and I kick 50. So Daisy, though, goes into her cabin to change, and Gary's in there and she's like, oh, G, I love sharing a cabin with you for so many reasons. But I think my all time favorite thing is that I don't have to share a bathroom with anyone. Except you do take a lot of shits. I think you're lactose intolerant. That's not normal.
Ben
But you do have to share bathrooms with him because he takes a lot of poops. Like, does she just mean with makeup and stuff?
Ronnie
I think. I think that's what she means.
Ben
I think he means he just poops and leaves. But then girls, like, sit. Sit there and do all their makeup and stuff like that. So then Gary's like, no relationship doctor here. But I feel the chemistry that I have with Daisy is like a chemistry where you have with your best friend. And I think ideally, if you marry somebody, you have to marry somebody who's like your best friend. Because then when you go around on your best friend, your best friend says, good job, mate. Yeah. Yell at you, scream at you, call you lactose intolerant. They flush the toilet. That's what they do for you.
Ronnie
So meanwhile, Dani is making a tablescape and she's saying that she's overwhelmed. I mean, this is your art, Dani. How could you be overwhelmed by it?
Ben
Yeah, I'm kidding. She. What do you. It's like Chapel Roan. I'm so overwhelmed. She's like, please don't talk to me while I'm working. It's my art. When I'm at work, I'm at work. She's, like, taking it way too seriously.
Ronnie
Chapel grown. So. So Danny and Diana are like. They're like, I don't even know what Studio 54 is, bro. She's like, me neither. Which I'm like, I'm embarrassed for you all, okay? Because you should know. I mean, we know we were not part of Studio 54, so. Hello. So then meanwhile, Daisy's checking to Glenn about Tender. There's just sort of stuff happening, and the guests are like, they're getting. They're gonna prepare to get on the tender because they want to go see the. To go see the procession. But first, Ronnie is taking a look at the decor that Dani is doing. Her art, I should say. Ronnie is looking at Dani's art, and then she's like, gold. Oh, God. You're put that. And they're putting black. No, I don't want black. No, no, black. I can't. I can't. Sorry. I don't like black. I mean, gold and black. I mean, gold black. It's like, that's basically like over the hill colors. That's like your dead colors. Like, oh, no, thank you. Oh, I'm sorry. Oh, disgusting.
Ben
Yeah, you know, like, black and gold. It's like when you. When you go to Walgreens and it says over the hill, it's black and gold. Like, what. What is this? A Walgreens? Oh, God. I mean, what are the colors?
Ronnie
Gold and black.
Ben
Thanks. Walgreens. No, fuck that. I don't want to look old. Honey, what do you think you look like right now? You're literally complaining to the manager over and over again. You're the lady who won't leave the customer service line. You don't have a receipt, and you're going to sit there and try and return some shit that was like, five, you know, five years old and dirty, okay? And you're yelling, holding up the line about how young and youthful you you sound.
Ronnie
Girl. Lady, don't complain about, like, quote unquote, turning old and then go on to national TV to celebrate turning 50. It's like, what do you want? You want. It's like, do you want to either turn. You want to turn 50, or do you not want to turn 50? Like, because you didn't have to come on TV and advertise to all the nation that you're turning 50. Okay? So relax. Yeah, so also, black and gold, by the way, black and gold does not. For the record, it does not mean you're over the hill. There's no connotation of that. You don't go into Walgreens and see black and gold and say you're over the hill. I don't know what this lady is on about. I don't know where this death spiral came from. I don't know. And by the way, I do want to thank her friend who put that into her head, because, you know, her friend is with her, like, let's with Ronnie. And tell her that black and gold means you're, like, decrepit because she just got this notion out of nowhere and is, like, forcing it on everyone. And this is supposed to be a Studio 54 party. Black and gold is probably the most appropriate colors you could use for a studio.
Ben
No, because what Dani is doing, she's doing that like you're over the hill. It's like a funeral time. You know how people do that? Usually it's when people turn 40 though. So I will say that. Is that his. Not wise on Danny's part because she's doing. I think what she's doing is that 40 year old thing where it's like, it's like a funeral. Everybody pretends it's a funeral. Like you're getting old and then people wear black and it's like funny because you're like 40, which is really old. But then when you hit 50, you really are like, oh my God, I'm old. Like I'm officially older now. Like I'm an older person. And then so when someone's like, haha, your funeral. It's like, girl, I had a heart attack this month. You can't throw me a pretend. It's not funny anymore. It's not a decade ago.
Ronnie
I honestly like Studio 54. Like I'm just looking at pictures of it. There's like a big 50. Okay, the colors for Studio 54 are black and gold. Okay? It's black and gold. The sign is gold. This lady cannot request a Studio 54 party and then get mad at the Studio 54 colors that are put out there. I don't care what. Danny, whatever. What if you can read all you want into black, but this is the Studio 54 colors. And this lady is an idiot. I'll say it right now.
Ben
She's very upset and she wants.
Ronnie
I'm mad at everything today. She literally likes brown paper packages too.
Ben
She literally will not stop bitching about it because they're like, okay, sorry, we'll change it. I mean, gold, white, rose gold. That would have nailed it, right? Rani? Go away. Go away with your. With your stupid stinging leg, okay? Nobody wants to hear it.
Ronnie
Rose gold literally nails nothing ever. I'm sorry, it doesn't. Ok. Rose gold.
Ben
So you don't want to look old, so you want a child's color. She's like, you know what? I made this pink. That's. That's what that would have done it.
Ronnie
Oh God.
Ben
Go back to bed, weird Barbie.
Ronnie
So now they're gonna go on their thing and so they, they're gonna go watch this procession and so get on the boat. And Glenn's telling us, as sailors, because the sea can be dangerous. It's always good to have a patron saint like Saint Carmen looking out for you. So this ceremony is all about ask protection when we venture out on the high seas. I'm like, it's not. It's not when you venture out on the high seas. It's for all the other boats that have to share a sea with Parceval, too. Knowing that boat's probably come crashing into them any second, they're like, please, patron saint card, Saint Carmen, please save us from parcel two careening into our bow.
Ben
As sailors, the seas can be dangerous for literally everybody around us. So we need St. Carmen, you know, and it's great she's a patron saint. I don't know if I believe in that stuff, but here's what I do know. Sure seems to turn me mermaids on. I love mermaids. So then Daisy's checking in on the decorating, and Danny's like, oh, it's not good here. She says she hates black, so we've got to change all of these black decorations.
Ronnie
Is she drunk? She's like, no, but she says it makes her look old. The truth hits bitch. Okay, so now the.
Ben
Now the lady is such a child. That makes me laugh.
Ronnie
She is. She really is. And so now the ladies get on to. They get onto the boat to the tender to go to the procession, everything. And they're, like, riding up. They're right up to, like, a barge or like a ferry. And I was like, wow, great procession. Guys enjoy watching the ferry go by, and there's like a Saint Carmen on the front of the ferry, but they can't find it because there are a lot of people. So now Ronnie starts to. She starts to Karen out. Sorry, I shouldn't say Karen, but she starts to, you know, Trishell out on the boat, on the. On the ferry, she's like, excuse me, can you move over? We're trying to see St. Carmen. Excuse me. Like, lady, they're on a ferry. They're not listening to you.
Ben
Jellyfish sting survivor here. Please move out of the way. You're basically standing in a handicap spot. Oh, God, this woman.
Ronnie
Could you imagine being on a ferry and a dinky little boat pulls up and says, excuse me, can you move to the side, please? I'm throwing my cup at her.
Ben
So then some people move, and we see. They circle on screen, this statue that everybody's clamoring to see, and it basically looks like one of those plaster of Paris pirate people that you see when you go into the Long John Silvers back in the day. You remember Those.
Ronnie
Yep.
Ben
I've never been that are holding the menus. It's like, take a menu or whatever.
Ronnie
Poor pirate reduced down to holding menus. Well, I've seen some crazy things in my day. I traveled the Emerald Isles and I went down to the Caribbean and I battled the Kraken, and now I hold menus. Please take a seat.
Ben
I've been to a lot of places, but have I ever been to me? Argh. Don't forget to check out the special appetizers.
Ronnie
Two for one crab leg deal between 5 and 6pm Enjoy.
Ben
We went and did this radio show this morning, and I just came in and jumped right on here and got to. Got to doing this. I didn't even have time to take off my pants and my shoes. I mean, I'm working like a professional in here. I'm wearing nice shoes. I'm wearing pants, like real pants, not jogging pants. I just wanted to update everybody on my vibe today.
Ronnie
Take a load off.
Ben
I'm taking my shoes off. God, my life has just changed. You know, you take one shoe off, oh, my God. It does something to me.
Ronnie
What a difference. Yes, what a difference. What a difference a shoe makes. God.
Ben
God bless it. My feet are free. Free. Okay, where were we? Pirates.
Ronnie
We're talking about, like, the debasement of a pirate holding menu. Is that a long time, Silver?
Ben
Okay, so now we're back on the yacht, and Daisy is talking to Cloyce, and she's like, are you getting up the food for the morning? I'm worried about your time, and I need it to be this, I need it to be that. I need to be him. He's like, please stop talking to me. You're giving me a boner.
Ronnie
So. So anyway, they're still taking. They're still enjoying this procession on the tender. And then back on deck, Dany is, like, moping because she doesn't like the new decor, which is yellow and white. And she's like, oh, it looked so cool before. Now it just looks so shitty. It's like, okay, just move on.
Ben
It's just as dollar store as it was before. You're. You're fine. Your mediocrity is consistent. Okay. Yes, yes. So then, Tammy, you know, the people are like, oh, my God. They come back to the boat after this lackluster moment. And then, I'm sorry, we forgot to.
Ronnie
Mention, by the way, we forgot to mention the most important moment of all this. While Ronnie was going on and on, she's like, I hate black. It's like a funeral. I Mean, it's just black. You don't. Black is stupid. I don't want to see it. It's ugly. It's trash. She's wearing a black top while she says this. Even her friend points it out. Like, Ronnie, you're wearing black right now. She's like, well, it's fine if it's on me. Shut up. Shut the fuck up, Ronnie.
Ben
Yeah. So she's like, oh, look at Studio 50. That's hilarious. And you guys. You guys missed it. It's 45, not 50. Like, oh, my God, please let this day end so we can stop pretending to like Ronnie.
Ronnie
I know they're poor friends. So Daisy and Cloy are going over the menu, and Chloe says, like, last night I had some communication issues with Daisy and the. The chief in the stew. The. The chief. The chief stew and the chef relationship is a little bit like marriage. Like, you have to adapt to each other's differences to overcome, to accomplish, like, whatever the mission is. Happy wife, happy life, as they say.
Ben
Sounds like he was being choked out. So then toddler Chase is like, so, dude, tell me about the time of night you go out, man. Like, do you go. Do you guys go clubbing? You go dancing and shit? Are we. You do. Cause I'm here. I'm here at Fun. Kara's like, we've been. Yeah, you moved about nights of fun. And he's like, well, do you get wasted? He's like, I like up. And my mouth gets worse when I've had a few drinks and I've offended few people. So I think that maybe I'm not going to anymore.
Ronnie
He just segues into, I'm just a gigolo.
Ben
Every season. At least once a season for Gary, we. We segue into that stupid song.
Ronnie
I wonder, you know, there's all. There's been talk, scuttlebutt that the season was re. Edited after Gary's allegations, yada, yada. And I wonder if there was something more significant that happened in terms of him offending someone or basically doing something gross or pervy.
Ben
I think so.
Ronnie
Got wasted because, like, like he. Last time he got drunk, there was like the.
Ben
The.
Ronnie
The bloody issue, But. But this is like, he's never felt the need to stop drinking, which makes me think there was something. There was something.
Ben
He's really pulling the victim card on this episode. So I don't know what happened, but it was something bad because for him to be like, oh, now I. I think I have a problem. Like, when you do that, you've really up. So they Edited out whatever the. This was. And I think you're right. I'm curious as to what it was. Cuz the sexual harassment allegation was, I believe, after they shot. Right?
Ronnie
Yeah, I think so. I think.
Ben
Or was it during the season?
Ronnie
I believe that this. No, because it was a. I don't know. I don't know, to be honest. But I feel like something happened that we didn't see. Whether it happened off camera or even on camera.
Ben
Yeah, because nobody on Bravo wastes that moment, you know, because that moment where you're like, I might have a problem. That's like a huge. And sorry to sound so cynical, but we've seen it so many times on these shows. That's when you've really fucked up. Like you've. You've almost gotten fired. You've lost everything. Like James Kennedy, for example. Like he got fired from Sir. He was not gonna be on the show. Nobody would hang out with him. They were trying to keep him out of the group. And then he was like, okay, now I don't have ice cream. Now I just have ice cream instead of drugs. And I'm happy. I'm happy, guys. I'm happy. And he tried that shit. But it was like really a dramatic thing that got him there. So. Yeah, I think you're right. Something, something happened here. Cause they're really overdoing it with his like. Oh, poor Gary. Look at him. He just wants to change.
Ronnie
Yeah. Yeah.
Ben
Which clearly I don't believe for two seconds.
Ronnie
So we suspect.
Ben
We.
Ronnie
We officially suspect. Here comes one right now.
Ben
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Ronnie
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Ben
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Ronnie
Additional accessories may be required for multiplayer mode games, system and some accessories sold separately. So now Diana and Cloys are in the galley talking about the night Ahead and everything and saying how it's gonna be a long one and everything. And Cloys is like, yeah, it's gonna be a long one. And Diana's like, don't say that. Do you know what time I have to wake up tomorrow morning? 8am is disgusting. I can't believe I can only get 8 hours sleep tonight on the boat. I am furious.
Ben
He's like, probably same as me, right? She's like, well, like, five. It's not even eight hours. What time are you waking up? He's like, oh, come on, later than five. Come on.
Ronnie
So, yeah, at this point, she still thinks she's waking up at 5.
Ben
Yeah, yeah. So then now the guests come back for dinner, or they arrive for dinner and they're all in Elton John glasses. It's so Studio 54. And Ronnie's like, I'm just wanting you now. It's Tequila nine.
Ronnie
Oh, God, she's the worst. So now the guests, they all sit down and Daisy's like, every time I'm going into a meal with Claus, I mean, it's like a bloody roller coaster. I'm just praying, please let this be a good meal. Please let this be a good meal. Try not to be offended, girls.
Ben
I think it's done pretty good overall, right? Well, yeah, I think that'd be traumatized.
Ronnie
Yeah. Well, I mean, once he. He had that, like, low point and then he got a talking to, and then he's really. He's pulled up a lot, and everything he served has looked actually really good. I think the issue has just been. There's been. There's been the timing stuff, but, like, honestly, we've seen much worse when it comes to chefs and timing.
Ben
Yeah, we sure have. So down at the galley, Gary is galloping around like a horse or. I don't know. Who cares? I'm skipping that part. So then later, Daisy's rig videoing Cloy. She's like, we're clearing now. We've picked up a plate. Cloyes Cloys Daisy. Daisy, I'm walking with the plate right to the stair. Cloys Cloy Daisy. Daisy, I've gone down two steps. Cloys Cloy Daisy. Just your daily reminder to stop being such a pussy.
Ronnie
What are you doing? Close. Oh, that's my way of saying 10, 4, or copy.
Ben
So it's more scary.
Ronnie
That was a Ben laugh. That was not a close laugh because I just. Now I'm laughing, like, apparently. So now it's time they bring out the cake, birthday cake and everything. And now it's time for the big skit. I have to say we've seen a lot of stupid ass skits on Below Deck over the years. I actually quite enjoyed this one. I feel like Keith's. Keith did good work curating. This came out with a little script and he read it and Gary was. Was dressed up like Ronnie. And at first you could see Ronnie was mad. It's like, this is offensive. I don't look like that. I'm not over the hill. Who said that? What? But then it was. It wound up being funny and Chase came out like a jellyfish, and they had like a little. A little thing. And, you know, I'm sort of into it.
Ben
Yeah. Well, that's good.
Ronnie
Think. Think.
Ben
I don't. I don't know what to say.
Ronnie
You don't have to say anything. You just say, yes, Ben, you're totally right.
Ben
You're correct.
Ronnie
And the Tony. And the Tony for best original play on a yacht goes to. Well, unfortunately, goes to Edward Albie. Unfortunately, there's another production happening same night on a different yacht. Sorry, Keith.
Ben
Ed Albie still wins it on a different yacht. I love that. It's Edward Albee, too. He's like, wait a minute. I did that in high school. Damn it.
Ronnie
Who's afraid of jellyfish? Wolves.
Ben
Yeah. So the lady's like, oh, my God, that was a good skit. And they loved it. It's really long, by the way. I'm still scrolling through it. If anyone's wondering why Ronnie sure disappeared from this, it's because I'm reading the book that is. This. That was a skit. I mean, he really did it. It was long. Daisy, when you showed it.
Ronnie
Yeah, sorry.
Ben
Well, I mean, look, it's a show. What is it supposed to be? Five minutes? You know, you gotta understand.
Ronnie
No, but when he showed his script. When he showed his script, it was like a page of single. Like, single space text. I was like, that's gonna.
Ben
Yeah, agreed. So then they. Daisy sends Diana to bed, and she's like, you can get back up at 8:15. And she goes, but wait, I thought you said five. And she's like, well, if you let me finish the conversation now, I'm gonna get up tomorrow. She's. I can get up. She's like, no, no, no. You made it very clear how you feel about that.
Ronnie
She's like, I'll take your passive aggression and I'll raise you 20 with a smile on my face. Cause that's why I got here.
Ben
This is aggressive aggression. Enjoy it.
Ronnie
Yeah, yeah. Daisy's like, diana, has this entitlement of like, why do I have to do this? Like, that's your job. And I also want to show her that I'm willing to do it. And what I ask people to do, I will do. So that being said, I'm fucking pissed.
Ben
I've agreed to do it because I like feeling pissed. And nothing has really pissed me off to this level yet, sir. I've had to create it for myself.
Ronnie
Yeah, that's actually true. And Daisy's like. She's like, well, I would have let you go for a nap tomorrow, but now I'm gonna be getting very little sleep. I get the nap now.
Ben
So Diana's like, bullshit. This is. I was going to do it. She's just trying to be a murder. And then the producer's like, well, but then if you were gonna do it, why'd you complain about it? What kind of stupid question is that? I do shit all day that I complain about all day. So what? I literally make a list before I go to bed of things that I have to do the next day. And then all night I'm like, I'm so mad about my list. That's life. That's how. That's how I get through the day. Okay, Stop trying to take away my tent poles.
Ronnie
But if you had a boss of yourself, you wouldn't be able to complain to your boss. The point is you. You complain behind the boss's back. Don't complain to the boss. The moment they tell you something, that's where Diana goes wrong.
Ben
Yes.
Ronnie
She's like, what? She's like, even though, by the way. And by the way, Daisy is being a martyr here. A total martyr, but in the service of passive aggression, which is always fun. But I guess that is what being a martyr is all about anyway. It's like the ultimate passive aggressive act. So Diana's.
Ben
Well, it's also service, right? Like, if you're a good server, you're ultimately a good martyr. It's like, oh, your.
Ronnie
Your.
Ben
Your meal was up. Okay. I'm not going to throw the chef under the bus. Even though it was totally their fault. You know, it was me flat self flagellation, you know?
Ronnie
Yeah. So I guess maybe when you advertise that you're a martyr, that's when it becomes passive aggressive.
Ben
You just sort of do, well, don't tell Jesus that. Oh, my God, he's built a whole religion. He's like the biggest martyr in the world. Like, what are you gonna do, take away Christianity? Come on.
Ronnie
But he didn't like summon everyone over to his cave, right? Like, kinda.
Ben
He kinda did. Wasn't he like floating up in the sky? He's like, guys, just got myself out of an unsealed cave. My last magic trick for a while. See you when I see ya.
Ronnie
I love caves.
Ben
So cut to a black and white photo of Doctor of Glenn with an afro with Jesus standing behind him, like giving a thumbs up.
Ronnie
Like, yeah, we spent a lot of time in games and one day this guy just sort of woke up out of nowhere. We thought, oh my God, where'd this guy come from? The whole religion started. So I mean, so I hear I'm Jewish. It makes no sense to me. So Diana's like, she's like, well, even though I'm doing great job, like doing the job, it doesn't make it right. They just make me feel like I'm doing this huge thing. Basically she just was like, I reserve the right to complain. So Diana, now she's, now she's pacing and she's being very dramatic, like.
Ben
And.
Ronnie
She'S like doing that thing where she's like ragefully cleaning little glasses and stuff.
Ben
She's waiting for someone. Someone. Someoneing. What's wrong with me? She's waiting for someone to ask her what's going on. So then Diana does, I mean Dani does and she's like, oh, she said you gave me altitude and you didn't let me finish. And Dani's like, what the, like what are you guys going to overthrow Daisy? Daisy does everything. She's so nice to you losers.
Ronnie
Yeah. So then Glenn tells the guests, they're basically says like the attend will be ready to take them to the island and everything. And now the, the pizza dough. They're checking on the pizza dough. And David Davide did a good job with the pizza dough. And then now the guests are getting ready to, to go out and everything. There's a lot of crossback stuff going back and forth. So anyway, the guests finally, the guests finally go to go to the club and they go out there, they're out there all night. Like they're out there until like they come back at 5 or 6 in the morning. I didn't realize all this talk about waking up at 5. I thought that meant for breakfast service. It was, I didn't realize it was to receive the guests coming back from partying.
Ben
Yeah, they literally party all night and are served at 5 in the morning. Morning. So then.
Ronnie
Oh, and by the way, during all this process, this is when the producers get to say you to the stews. Because the producer starts pointing out how much sleep everyone has gotten. And everyone's like, on three hours, like, Daisy, three hours. Chlois, four hours. Keith, zero hours. They're just, like, building a case against Danny and Diana.
Ben
So Daisy's like, I can't be bothered with that nightclub crap. Which is so funny because you see all the shit that they're going.
Ronnie
So Daisy.
Ben
So they come back, and now it's time to eat. So they're being served, and they're eating it, but they're so tired, you know? So then there's Mac and cheese, there's quesadillas. I mean, this is good drunk food. I have to give the Cloy Cloys credit.
Ronnie
Cloys went above and beyond, because on other boats, like the last season on Blow Duck Med, it's like, pre making some, like, cold sandwiches or, like, some sad, like, flatbreads. Like, this was proper got back from the club and I want to eat some carbs and go to sleep. I. This was great.
Ben
Yes, it really was. And so they go to bed, and then it's the last day of charter, and now we see how much sleep everybody got. Diana Dijana got eight hours. Eight hours of sleep. Crazy. Meanwhile, Daisy's nodding off on the juicer after her four hours. And it says, keith, zero hours of sleep.
Ronnie
Yeah. So Daisy's talking to Keith and she's like, I'll be back in a second, but think about what. Think about tonight. What's not going to be? And he's like, I don't know. I'm just gonna have fun. And anybody want to get on the fun team with me? We're to go on a fun jam. It's like, that sounds real fun there, Keith.
Ben
So then Daisy's like, well, I'm the one who's never been caught in any drama a little bit with Gary, but that's just because it's been long, long time. He's like, yeah, that's true. Well, you know, as we say in the Sound of Music, brown paper packages tied up in string. Am I right? Like, what the fuck are you talking about me?
Ronnie
It. He's like, I love Gary. He just needs to know how to dial back the fun. And I think Daisy needs someone a bit more mature, you know? Huh. And then we cut to a shot of Gary peeing in the bathroom with the door open.
Ben
I. You know who everybody wants to date? Somebody who says things like, I think we just need to learn to dial back at the front. That's what we need.
Ronnie
Yeah. So, yeah, Gary is Peeing and everything. Glenn, it's. People are waking up because the guests are waking up at 10am and that we also. Even the guests get a chiron that says slept three hours. Literally everyone on this boat has not had more than five hours of sleep. Except for the two stews who complained.
Ben
Yep. So then Danny serves her, and Daisy's asking what Rani's mood is, and Danny's like, I'm afraid of her. She's like, yeah, she's scared. I was saying, she gives me, like, PTSD with some stepmom because, you know, no matter what you do, nothing is good enough. You can't ever please the woman. Danny, do that better. Please don't you fold him.
Ronnie
Try not to be offended, you lazy bitch.
Ben
And Dani does her best to not say, like you. So then now it's time to pack. They dock. And now Chase is in the wheelhouse flirting poorly with Diana. He's really trying to flirt with Diana. So he's like, so where are you gonna go back when this is all done, huh, toots? And check Portugal. Oh, cool. Great. That's the thing I like. Like, in Portugal, there's almost no yacht, so you make friends, you know, and then I don't see them for two years. Yeah, it's a tough industry because, you know, you make good friends, and then, you know, like, you basically live with people. Right. And then you don't see people. Yes. It's what I just said. Yeah. Still hot. Because there's nobody else here, so.
Ronnie
So then Chase talks about how he, you know, he's like, I think there's more to Diana than meets the eye. You. I haven't been in a serious relationship for some time. I briefly dated, you know, Chef Nalisha, but she lives in Sydney, and I live in Charleston. It just didn't work out. And I came into the season looking. Not looking. I mean, looking for a boatman's. But Diana's stunning, so I'm excited to see what happens. I need to work on my glutes. Well, whatever it is.
Ben
So then Danny and Diana are. Oh. So then, of course, Dani gets. Smells it in the water that her man is being flirted with. With. So she immediately starts coming up and asking a million questions to disrupt them. So she's like, have you seen that little knife? Like, my knife? The tiny knife that I wouldn't be using to stab anybody right now if I had it?
Ronnie
Yes, it's in the drawer. Thank you so much. Then, like, three seconds later. By the way, does anyone remember where the bathroom is on this boat. I just can't seem to find it. Can. Chase, can you show me how to get to the bathroom?
Ben
So Tiana's like, I skip arm day. Okay. Look at that. Actually, no, it's pretty good. He's like, whoa, which way did the gun. Excuse me, guys. So sorry about that. I lost the knife in the bathroom. Can you open the bathroom door to see if the knife is still in there?
Ronnie
Guys, I'm really sorry, but there's this little round thing on the door, and I don't know how to use it. Chase, can you show me how to use it? You mean the doorknob? Yeah, I keep pushing it. It's not working. Oh, you gotta twist it. Can you just show me? Thank you so much.
Ben
All right, you. You guys go ahead. I. I don't want to bother you. Okay? Okay. So anyway, here is my guns. By the way, has anybody seen the knife in the bathroom with my glutes? I've lost my glutes. Has anybody seen anything that can help me out here?
Ronnie
She's so awful.
Ben
God, she really is.
Ronnie
So. And of course, you know, Diana is just, like, scowling as Chase goes off with Danny to help slice fruit and stuff. So then now the guests leave. They give, you know, Ronnie gives her a little spiel. She gives the tip. Glenn does the thing. He honks the horn and everything. And. And then we have Diana and Chase, you know, talking. He, like. He, like, kind of, like, rests his head on her shoulder. He's like, I'm sleepy, you know? And, you know, for a moment, I thought, like, oh, this is kind of nice. Maybe he is starting to move over to Diana, which would make Danny so mad. I was. I was really hoping for that.
Ben
It seems like he's at least trying it on. Right, right. And. But like most men, especially on this show, he's just gonna go with whatever's easiest, you know what I mean? And she's not as easy. And I don't mean, like, you know, loose wise, like, she wasn't easy. Girl, I don't mean like that. I just mean it's, you know, she's not as conversational and, like, she doesn't make it as easy, you know?
Ronnie
Yeah, Diana's more of a hard nut to crack.
Ben
Right? And Dan, Dani's like a bowl of nuts. It's already been cracked and so roasted.
Ronnie
She is full on peanut butter.
Ben
There's no work involved.
Ronnie
It's not even crunchy. It's smoothie.
Ben
Just swallow it if you need it. So then Daisy is now Talking to Diana, and she's like, what? Oh, she's talking to both the girls about how the charter was. And Diana's like, well, it was crazy, but we managed, you know, I mean, it was fine. And then Daisy's like, well, we need assistant. Because when I say things and it doesn't get done, I get to know it with it. I really do, girls, and here's what I need. And Diana's like, well, I mean, but I understood I was gonna finish at midnight. Sleep till five, which is not ever five, because you have to wake up earlier. And she's like, I know, I know. Well, I got fuck all sleep last night. It's just the attitude in the moment that you gave me, you know? And I know all my decisions don't always make sense, but there's actually thought behind it, believe it or not.
Ronnie
You know, like, being friends with Gary. And Diana's like, sometimes like, oh, okay, well, I'll pretend like I didn't hear that. Anyway, go clean up. So now it's time for the. The. The tip meeting time. And Glenn's like, well, everyone, unfortunately, the primary got attacked by a jellyfish. But, you know, way to go handling the jellyfish thing. And especially the apology before performance, which was phenomenal. It was like the cave of performances. And Gary, overall, the deck team seems to be really gelling, huh? See what I did there? Gelling and working quite well together.
Ben
Chase is like, wow, so good to be back here. Thanks for the compliment, buddy. God, I miss this couch. This is the money couch. Which is funny, because I think that's a J.D. vance quote, which is odd. So then Gary's like, yeah, welcome, Chase. You're doing great. Thanks, buddy. Yeah, we're actually. We're very, very glad to see you somewhere. Emma was just like, well, thanks a lot. Don't really even need to be there to be this, do I? I mean, you can still get me all the way over here. You must feel so powerful right now.
Ronnie
Well, she hasn't. Emma still hasn't made it to shore because on the tender ride over, she's like, hold on. Can we just take a cigarette break real quickly? Hold on, hold on one sec. She's just taking cigarette breaks and napping. Are you ready to go to shore yet? Not yet.
Ben
I'm exhausted. Please. So now Chase is doing bicep flexes, and Danny's pretending to ignore him, and they ended up making 24,000, which is pretty good, right? Geez.
Ronnie
Yeah, Even this. Even this miserable primary still tipped more than Dr. Contessa. I'd like to point out, Dr. Contessa, I think still has a little lowest. The lowest tip of the season.
Ben
Yeah. Of all time, I think ever. Has there been a lower tip than that?
Ronnie
Yeah, there has been. There definitely. Remember Charles? That guy Charles and Erica Rose and there been. There have been some low tippers for sure.
Ben
Yeah. So then now everybody gets ready to go out tonight and Daisy and Gary are talking, making small talk. And like Gary's saying, oh, we're gonna drink tonight. You know, listen, then just don't drink. But when you go and make it like, this is how I know he's not sincere with wanting to turn over any leaf because he's making it like, look, everybody, I'm not going to be drinking tonight. I hope we're all happy. Poor, poor Gary. Like, you have to make a huge fucking song and dance out of it. Just don't have a drink, bro.
Ronnie
So you're not gonna drink for the rest of the season, Gara. And he's like, yeah, pretty much. Because every time I drink, I think I offend people and that's just not what I want to do. I'm a little angel boy. It's like, I think I am very different when I drink. I don't think alcohol is my friend. I do it as an escape, I guess. But maybe I do it just because everybody else is drinking and I don't want to feel left out. I'm a damaged person. Oh, I feel bad for Gary.
Ben
Oh, poor Gary. Poor Gary. And so this is like, well, I'm fully behind this if he really wants to stop drinking. But it's basically the Emma, the MF storylines in it. It's not going to last very long. So G's like, take some time off and reflect where I want to move forward with my life and whether I'm going to let H continue my life. Because right now I'm just feeling. Shut up. I do not believe one thing he's saying. I don't believe it. No.
Ronnie
Daisy's like, honestly, I'll be surprised if he makes it to dinner. What I'm trying to say is he's a full blown alcohol alcoholic like bk. So Gary, Gary is going to be trying this out. So now everyone gets ready to go out. Davide. I don't know what was going on with that sleeveless shirt he was wearing, but he's getting more comfortable between that and his flat iron hair. I just don't know what to say. You know what? Bravo to personal style while not giving a choices.
Ben
Yeah. Seriously, Choices. So then Chase is like, whoa, you look like Sig Freed and Roy. Jeez, you taming tigers? And he's like, mo. Yeah, that's what it is.
Ronnie
Mozam chic, huh? So then there's more flirting with Diana, Chasing Diana. And he's asking her about her tattoo. She has a tattoo on her arm of her and her grandpa. Grandpa. And he's like, you and your grandpa? And she's like, yeah, basically, she got it after he died, and it was nice. He's like, oh. And. And Diana's like, chase is hot and nice, but I usually date people that end up treating me like. So, you know, I. My last boyfriend was a bit of narcissist, and when we broke up four years ago, I just put up huge walls so I could protect myself. I mean, admittedly, last boyfriend was putting. But, you know, he is all about himself, and it's hard.
Ben
He literally just blew down the wall. He took tank and blew down over it. I had to keep building wall. My arm was so tired. By end, I said, I can't have another relationship.
Ronnie
But I'm still guarded. But Chase doesn't seem like a fuckboy. Just a guy who's really annoying with bad tattoos. And at this point, I'm ready to be treated like a human. Oh, my God.
Ben
His tattoos are just. Wow. I do not remember how bad his tattoos were. Did you?
Ronnie
I did. No, I. No, I didn't. You know, I'm lying. I didn't remember until he showed up.
Ben
I didn't remember.
Ronnie
Yeah, he's got the bad tattoos.
Ben
They are thirsty tattoos. Those are some serious. Because it's like the Harry Styles thing, but it's. What are the eagle wings or something on his chest?
Ronnie
I don't like this. I don't love the tattoo on the pecs.
Ben
I just feel like that's the Harry Styles, right? Well, I think his are right below.
Ronnie
Yeah. Either way, it's just. I feel like pecs are such a sexy, like, part of a. Of a man. And, like, I just feel like putting, like, a big old stamp on it. I just feel like you're ruining it a little bit.
Ben
1. It's just something like, you don't understand age or aging because when you put, like, eagle wings on it, for example, as you age and start to sag, it's just like a frowny mustache face. You know what I mean? Like, you need to.
Ronnie
It's true.
Ben
You need to think of a future. Don't stop thinking about tomorrow, guys.
Ronnie
Yeah. Even birds put their wings down a Little bit. So be careful, because those wings cannot stay extended the entire time.
Ben
It's like, oh, my God, you've got a. Is that a dead bird on your chest? No, I'm just old. All right, so Tom Selleck, they go to dinner and everyone's like, oh, my God, we're going to party. Ah, we're going to go wild, aren't we, Cloyes? Cloys is going to live his best life. I'll have a mocktail. Did everyone hear me? I would like something without alcohol because I'm not drinking alcohol because I'm a good person.
Ronnie
Well, G said, you're going to be a sober. I guess someone else can make a fool of themselves. Cloy, say something. Okay, Daisy, I do like your hair like this. And I bet you get a lot of people interested in a taste of Ireland. For sure. Top of the morning.
Ben
And they're all like, oh, gross. Jesus, Cl, Lay off the cocktails yourself. Then I think, that's the worst thing you possibly ever said.
Ronnie
Taste of Ireland. That's not even a thing. Daisy's like, oh, no. So then we see Captain Glenn doing calisthenics. He's got those, like, those bands, those exercise bands. He's like, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. Whoa, that's too much. Okay, back to the iPad in bed.
Ben
That was hard. So then Chase is flirting with Diana a little bit, and it's not going very well. And he's like, I'm pretty dumb. And she's like, I think you are more savage because you'll say shit. And then Gary's like, I'm going to pee. Pee. So Chase goes with him. And then Daisy asks Diana what's going on. She's like, what's happening with you and Jaz? Oh, fuck off. Don't tell me nothing. You vibe well enough. I like it. Oh, you think you're sweet together. You get on. Would you make out with them? Do it. She did it. Eh? Did you do it or are you gonna do it? Do you have reservations on him? Do it before that one jumps on him, because you know she will like a fly on that one. No offense, Chase. You're not. Not calling. You. Really? It's like white on rice. Really?
Ronnie
And Diana's like, yeah, probably so. So Daisy's like, yes. Chase vibes. So then Guy's like, oh, being sober around a whole bunch of drunk people is something I haven't experienced before. Everyone's sloppy. Everyone's slurring their words. I'm like, have you hurt yourself on camera before?
Ben
Haven't you ever watched this show? So then now they're gonna go back to the boat and party there. And so they do. And then Keith is like, I'm going to train the Little Wayne. Like, wow, he's really come out of his shell. Who knew Keith even said things like that?
Ronnie
I know. I can't even believe he knew who Lil Wayne even was. Was. So it's like little Wayne Newton, of course. Right?
Ben
So Donker Sin darling. Donker Shin.
Ronnie
Gary is like, I'm going to go to bed. Blue. Blue. So he gets into bed and everyone's up at the. On the hot tub, drinking, having fun, partying, great times, etc. And. And then they tell they're playing a game where they have to. To like, they get prompts to do something. So Keith gets a prompt to give a pickup line to Daisy. So he goes up to Daisy, goes, hey, baby, are you Irish by chance? Because I want to churn your butter. I think people need to work on their Irish puns tonight. We're over two.
Ben
I love your country. Most of all, you're here. Second of all, you've given me a boner.
Ronnie
Do you happen to have a Guinness? Because I'd like to get up in your business.
Ben
So. So then what do we do next? So then Davide. Davide goes to check on Gary. He's like, are you okay? What are you doing in here? We are partying, brother. And he's like, I can't party. I'm just not drinking anymore. I'm a good person now. Bloody blood. I'm reading a kind dare. Hello, this is Kindle. Whatever it is upside down, stop it. Do you know what words are? This is a book. Oh, disgusting. God, what have I done?
Ronnie
I've got a problem. And I think I need to learn when to say no or how to stop myself from continuing down this road. It's abuse. And when I start, it doesn't stop. I scare the shit out of me, to be honest.
Ben
Well, this storyline's triggering me. It's really bothering me. I don't know why. It's really bothering me watching Gary take something that most people really go through that's a real thing, and trivializing it because he got in trouble. And I feel like that's what's going on here. If I thought there was one, one smidgen of him actually thinking like, wow, maybe I have a problem that I need to get this taken care of. This is not cool for the people around me. This is not like if that was a real thing that he was going through. I would like it. It. But I don't believe it for one second. It just seems so fake. And someone told him, like, you have to say this stuff, and really, this is how you really take responsibility. Get up and say how you've got a problem and you'll do anything to change it. And he's just doing it, and it's bugging me.
Ronnie
I don't like it. I. I would say, actually, my hot take on it is that I actually think what he's feeling is genuine, but I don't think he's really at the place yet to really do something about it. I think he's doing this thing where he's like, well, if I can. I can do this.
Ben
This.
Ronnie
I. I'll be fine. I'll. I'll just.
Ben
I hope so.
Ronnie
And I. But. But I. I don't. Knowing Gary and, like, knowing how hard the road is, I feel like this is not like, oh, this. He's turned over a new leaf, regrettably. I think this is him thinking that he has, but I think he's gonna just slide back into old ways.
Ben
Yeah. I mean, I think the thoughts he's thinking are real, but I think they're regurgitated from other things he's heard. I don't know that he's really feeling. I think he's just, like, learned that this is what you say when you're in trouble. And it's just. It's.
Ronnie
I think it could be all above. It could be all the above.
Ben
Yeah, I think it's.
Ronnie
I think it's what you're saying and what I'm saying altogether, to be honest.
Ben
Yeah. Everybody get in the pool. So. Hey, Ronnie.
Ronnie
Hey, Ronnie. Try not to get offended, okay? Gary's storyline.
Ben
So now people go and back in the hot tub, they're playing, like, naughty games. And then there's, like, a game, like, you have to do your favorite. Well, Daisy does suck and blow and accidentally kisses Keith. Wacky. And then Danny gets to recreate her favorite movie makeout scene with Chase, which, of course, they get that. And so they do the Notebook scene, and they start making out really hard. And then Danny tops him, like, gets on top of him and starts grinding up against him, making out. And of course, Diana is like, oh, my God, I only slept eight hours for this.
Ronnie
Let me cover face with foam so I don't have to look at these idiots. So, yeah, basically, then Chase and Danny go to the master bedroom, and they. They go in there, and Danny's like, can I tell you something bad. I've come in here once before. He goes with someone else on the boat. She goes, no, not on the boat. But we didn't do anything. Anything because. Well, I appreciate you telling me that.
Ben
Who is that? Gary?
Ronnie
No, she went with the. The guy from the. From the. The club. The child from the club.
Ben
Oh, right, right, right. Gary. She just went. And they went to bed. Right, right, right.
Ronnie
Yeah.
Ben
We didn't do anything. You didn't do anything. I know.
Ronnie
See, Little liar. Little liar.
Ben
And so then, Danny, if Daisy sees Diana, she's like, all right, well, bad call on my part. I just heard an actual getting slapped. So it's probably bad call on my part. But I thought you were vibing.
Ronnie
Then Diana's like, no, Danny is obsessed with him. I'm gonna call Vladimir now. She's. Oh, stop. She's like, I'm not dumb. She says, you know, when you're on the boat and all of your life is these people, and you only connect with someone basically like Chase, and now that person is connecting with someone else, and now you're alone. It's very frustrating. Frustrating. It's like you don't belong anywhere.
Ben
And then we just hear a slap on the ass and. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. I like that. He slaps her on the ass and goes, wow. And she goes, what? And he goes, wow. Oh, all right.
Ronnie
So that was the end of the episode. I did feel bad for. For Diana. That sucks. That sucks so much. But, you know, she can do much better, and she will do better once she gets off the boat. She will remember that she's, like, drop dead gorgeous.
Ben
And, yeah, that girl looks like Heather Graham. I'm not going to, like, cry for that. I'm not. I'm not crying for Argentina today, okay? They're much better than chase out there, 100%. Also banks, everybody. Thank you so much for everything, for being here with us, for talking with us. We sure love you guys. Go get tickets for the mounting Hysteria tour starting next month over at watch what crappens.com and for the Golden Crappies, which is February 1st on Broadway in New York City. City. And we will talk to you next time. Okay, bye.
Ronnie
Bye. Watch what Crappins would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alison King. It's always automatic with Ashley Auto.
Ben
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Ben
She ain't no shrinking violet Cootar. We love you guys. If you like, watch what crappens. You can listen ad free right now by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short survey@wondery.com survey.
Ronnie
Hello, ladies and germs, boys and girls, the Grinch is back again to ruin your Christmas season with Tis the Grinch Holiday Podcast. After last year, he's learned a thing or two about hosting and he's ready to rant against Christmas cheer and roast his celebrity guests like chestnuts on an open fire. You can listen with the whole family as guest stars like Jon Hamm, Brittney Broski and Danny DeVito try to persuade the mean old Grinch that there's a lot to love about the insufferable holiday season. But that's not all. Somebody stole all the children of Whoville's letters to Santa, and everybody thinks the Grinch is responsible. It's a real who, Bill? Who done it? Can Cindy Lou and Max help clear the Grinch's name? Grab your hot cocoa and cozy slippers to find out. Follow Tis the Grinch Holiday Podcast on the Wondery App or wherever you get your podcasts. Unlock weekly Christmas mystery bonus content and listen to every episode ad free by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery App, Spotify or Apple Podcasts.
Ben
They say Hollywood is where dreams are made, a seductive city where many flock to get rich, be adored and capture America's heart. But when the spotlight turns off, fame, fortune and lives can disappear in an instant. When TV producer Roy Raiden was found dead in a Canyon near LA in 1983, there were many questions surrounding his death. The last person scene with him was Lainey Jacobs, a seductive cocaine dealer who desperately wanted to be part of the Hollywood elite. Together, they were trying to break into the movie industry, but things took a dark turn when a million dollars worth of cocaine and cash went missing. From Wondery comes a new season of the hit show Hollywood and Crime. The Cotton Club Murder. Follow Hollywood and Crime the Cotton Club Murder on the Wondery App or wherever.
Ronnie
You get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of the.
Ben
Cotton Club Murder early and ad free right now by joining Wondery Plus.
Watch What Crappens Podcast Summary: Episode #2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
Released on December 17, 2024
In episode #2657 of Watch What Crappens, hosts Ben Mandelker and Ronnie Karam delve into the latest installment of Bravo's popular reality series, Below Deck Sailing Yacht Season 5 Episode 11, titled "Broadway Stinger." This episode offers a comprehensive and humorous breakdown of the yacht's drama-filled charter in Ibiza, highlighting the crew's interpersonal conflicts, guest interactions, and unexpected challenges.
Ben and Ronnie kick off the discussion with their usual blend of praise and ridicule, setting the tone for an engaging analysis. Ben announces their upcoming "Mounting Hysteria" tour, emphasizing their enthusiasm for interacting with fans and promoting their shows. Ronnie shares her excitement about reconnecting with Leah Black on the Jeff Lewis show, adding a personal touch to their banter.
Notable Quote:
Ben [05:17]: "We are so excited to be back on the road. They are a really fun experience. They really are a really fun experience."
The episode centers around the yacht's charter in Ibiza, where tensions rise amid jellyfish stings, questionable decor choices, and strained relationships among the crew.
Jellyfish Incident: The crew faces a significant issue when a stewardess named Ronnie gets stung by a jellyfish. This incident becomes a recurring point of contention, symbolizing the natural karma at play and sparking debates about responsibility and nature.
Notable Quote:
Ronnie [06:36]: "It shows that nature has karma. And she should have been stung because she was terrible about her coffee."
Decor Dilemmas: Daisy, one of the stews, criticizes the yacht's new black and gold decor, equating it to "over the hill colors." Her relentless negativity about the aesthetics leads to heated exchanges with Danny, another stewardess, highlighting the ongoing friction within the team.
Notable Quote:
Ben [06:52]: "It's not her fault for being an asshole. It's Dani's fault for always getting offended."
Guest Management and Midnight Snacks: The charter guests request midnight snacks, a red flag for Ben and Ronnie who anticipate poor service. However, the yacht crew surprisingly prepares an abundance of snacks, deviating from typical expectations and raising questions about the season's direction.
Notable Quote:
Ronnie [15:50]: "Anyone who watches Below Deck knows the moment that midnight snacks are called out is the moment that midnight snacks will not be prepared."
Daisy vs. Diana: A significant focus is on the strained relationship between Daisy and Diana. Daisy consistently complains about Diana not receiving adequate breaks, portraying Diana as entitled. Their back-and-forth showcases the high-stress environment aboard the yacht and the resultant interpersonal conflicts.
Notable Quote:
Ronnie [25:19]: "Diana's reaction is really over the top. I've worked seasons where I've had five hours of sleep the whole season."
Gary's Struggle with Alcohol: Gary, another key crew member, grapples with his drinking habits. Although he declares his intention to stop drinking to improve his behavior, Ben and Ronnie express skepticism about his sincerity, suggesting it may be a facade rather than genuine change.
Notable Quote:
Ben [73:03]: "If I thought there was one smidgen of him actually thinking, 'Wow, maybe I have a problem,' I would like it."
Chase's Flirtations: Chase's attempts to flirt with Diana add another layer of drama. His persistent, albeit clumsy, advances highlight the romantic tensions aboard the yacht, culminating in awkward and unreciprocated moments that fuel further crew tensions.
Throughout their discussion, Ben and Ronnie provide sharp commentary and memorable quotes that encapsulate the episode's essence.
On Jellyfish as Antagonists:
Ronnie [08:04]: "Do something for it, like a shark. A jellyfish is just a blobby, spineless thing."
On Daisy's Passive Aggression:
Ben [50:24]: "I've agreed to do it because I like feeling pissed. And nothing has really pissed me off to this level yet."
On Decor Disputes:
Ronnie [32:05]: "Black and gold does not mean you're over the hill. There's no connotation of that."
On Gary's Apology:
Ben [72:27]: "So, now they bring out the cake and the big skit. I have to say we've seen a lot of stupid ass skits on Below Deck, but this one was actually quite enjoyable."
Ben and Ronnie conclude the episode by reflecting on the overarching themes of the episode, such as the futility of constant complaining, the challenges of leadership aboard a luxury yacht, and the thin line between genuine change and performative actions.
On Crew Morale:
Ronnie [73:18]: "I think he's doing this thing where he's like, 'Well, if I can, I can do this. I'll be fine.'"
On Overall Episode:
Ben [75:01]: "I really do feel like this is not like, oh, this. He's turned over a new leaf, regrettably. I think this is him thinking that he has, but I think he's gonna just slide back into old ways."
Despite the drama and conflicts, the hosts maintain their trademark humor, ensuring listeners are both entertained and informed about the latest happenings in the Below Deck Sailing Yacht series.
Episode #2657 of Watch What Crappens offers a thorough and entertaining analysis of Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger. Through witty commentary and insightful observations, Ben and Ronnie navigate the complexities of yacht life, highlighting the delicate balance between maintaining professionalism and managing personal grievances. Their ability to mock while expressing genuine affection for the show ensures that listeners gain a comprehensive understanding of the episode's key moments and underlying tensions.
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