#2663 Southern Charm S10E03: Against One’s Letter Judgment

Summary

Watch What Crappens - Episode #2663 Summary

Podcast Information:

• Title: Watch What Crappens
• Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam
• Platform: Wondery
• Episode: #2663 - Southern Charm S10E03: Against One’s Letter Judgment
• Release Date: December 20, 2024

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Introduction

In this festive episode of Watch What Crappens, hosts Ben Mandelker and Ronnie Karam delve into the latest installment of Southern Charm Season 10, Episode 3 titled "Against One’s Letter Judgment." As the hosts usher in the holiday season, they share updates about their upcoming live shows in Vegas, Texas, and Charlotte, encouraging listeners to purchase tickets via their website.

Ben Mandelker [02:20]: "Hello and welcome to Watch What Crappens, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about."

Ronnie Karam [02:30]: "Hi, how are you?"

Episode Recap: "Gone to the Dogs"

Music and Atmosphere

The episode begins with praise for the exceptional musical score of Southern Charm. Ronnie highlights the live orchestration that adds a cinematic feel to the show.

Ronnie Karam [06:32]: "My first thought, God, the music on this show really is top notch... Whoever is playing the instrument that goes adoing. They deserve a Grammy award."

Character Dynamics and Storylines

Vanita's Presence: Ben and Ronnie express disappointment over Vanita's minimal presence despite her consistent opening scenes.

Ronnie Karam [08:15]: "We see Taylor's our resident dog talker."

Ben Mandelker [09:25]: "They really never hear Vanita again. Last episode, at least, she had a scene where she was talking to JT about wanting to go to lunch."

Gaston’s Leaf Blowing Scene: A notable scene involves Gaston blowing leaves with a leaf blower, which the hosts find unsatisfying as the actual outcome isn't shown, leaving them feeling cheated.

Ben Mandelker [09:46]: "I felt like it was very much Chekhov's leaves. I wanted to see all the leaves go up in the air."

Ronnie Karam [10:13]: "It's like Chekhov's gun. You can't introduce a leaf blower and not have it finish the job."

Craig and JT’s Turmoil: The core of the episode revolves around JT's strained relationship with Patricia and his fallout with friends Craig and Austin. The hosts dissect JT's poorly executed apology letter, mocking his handwriting and choice of words, deeming it both cringeworthy and ineffective.

Ben Mandelker [14:25]: "His handwriting is bad. Just like, oh, the whole thing would get... made me want to crawl out of my skin."

Ronnie Karam [17:54]: "He's a dummy. So he's like..."

Madison’s Confrontation: Madison confronts JT about his inappropriate comments, leading to a heated exchange filled with insults and dismissive remarks. The hosts critique Madison's lack of empathy and JT's inability to handle the situation maturely.

Ronnie Karam [37:05]: "This was so funny because they're literally like, are you ready to hang out?"

Ben Mandelker [43:26]: "He's like, please don't make me feel bad for JT because that's not the spot I..."

Doggy Parting Time: Rodrigo and Tyler’s dog party is another focal point, showcasing their unique approach to hosting. The hosts humorously comment on the event's awkwardness and the interactions among the participants, especially highlighting the mismatched personalities and strained friendships.

Ben Mandelker [50:24]: "You know what? JT has really bungled his season so far."

Ronnie Karam [52:29]: "They adopted the dog from an elderly woman who couldn't take care of her dog anymore. That is actually really cute."

Character Analysis

JT’s Vulnerability: Ben and Ronnie debate whether JT exhibits genuine vulnerability or if his actions are merely performative. They conclude that JT's attempts at apologizing are insincere, exacerbated by Craig's manipulative influence.

Ben Mandelker [26:00]: "Craig is definitely 100 times more vulnerable than any of the other guys on this show."

Craig’s Manipulation: Craig is portrayed as a manipulative figure who has managed to maintain his charm despite questionable actions. The hosts discuss his past behaviors, including his deceitful interactions and his impact on JT’s reputation.

Ronnie Karam [11:23]: "Gaston’s just a user, piece of trash douchebag."

Madison’s Tough Stance: Madison is critiqued for her harsh treatment of JT, showing no leniency or willingness to understand his perspective. The hosts find her actions both justified and excessively harsh.

Ben Mandelker [84:53]: "Molly's like, I don't want to just, like, go up to her and just be high."

Key Moments and Insights

1. Letter Writing Critique:

   • Ben Mandelker [16:25]: "He writes deer in all caps. Like, why are you doing that? Why are you screaming deer?"

2. Character Introductions:

   • Introduction of new cast members and their integration into existing relationships, emphasizing the show's effort to refresh its cast dynamics.

3. Dog Adoption Story:

   • Rodrigo and Tyler’s adoption of senior dogs is highlighted as a heartwarming subplot, contrasted humorously by their banter about the dogs' behaviors.

Ronnie Karam [46:17]: "They're really into senior dogs. You know, like, they have to throw the ball two times a day. That's it."

Conclusions and Final Thoughts

Overall, Ben and Ronnie provide a biting yet humorous critique of Southern Charm's latest episode. They highlight the show's ongoing character struggles, especially focusing on JT's downfall and the toxic dynamics introduced by Craig. The hosts appreciate the introduction of new cast members but remain skeptical about the long-term impact of these changes.

Ben Mandelker [80:36]: "They did a pretty good job layering in new people. This show has been really good about layering in new people."

Ronnie Karam [73:14]: "You are unbelievable. I thought that was a pretty good apology."

They wrap up the episode by reaffirming their love for Bravo's dramatic flair while maintaining their signature mockery and affectionate ridicule.

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Notable Quotes:

• Ronnie Karam [06:32]: “My first thought, God, the music on this show really is top notch...”
• Ben Mandelker [09:46]: “I felt like it was very much Chekhov's leaves. I wanted to see all the leaves go up in the air.”
• Ronnie Karam [17:54]: “He's a dummy. So he's like...”
• Ben Mandelker [14:25]: “His handwriting is bad. Just like, oh, the whole thing would get... made me want to crawl out of my skin.”

Final Remarks

Ben and Ronnie conclude with holiday greetings, expressing gratitude to their listeners and teasing upcoming episodes focused on other Bravo shows like Summer House.

Ronnie Karam [87:57]: “So Madison's really nothing without somebody to hate on. And she's got him.”

Ben Mandelker [88:03]: “Yeah. And let's have Vanita steam her drapes.”

The episode is a blend of sharp wit, humorous observations, and critical analysis, making it both entertaining and insightful for fans of Bravo’s drama-filled reality TV landscape.

Transcript

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[Ben Mandelker]

Hello and welcome to Watch what Crap Ends, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker joining me, Ronnie Caram. Hi Ronnie, how are you?

[Ronnie Karam]

Hi, how are you?

[Ben Mandelker]

I'm good. I'm on the threshold of a sneeze and I'm like, is it going to happen? It's not going to happen. No one away. It went away. So everyone sneeze. We are so excited. We are approaching our Christmas break. It's our holiday break actually because Hanukkah is also going to happen during this week. So we're really excited about that. Uh, today we are recapping Southern Charm, which is very fun, very entertaining. And the big exciting thing is that all of our tickets are now on sale for Vegas and Texas shows and Charlotte, as well as all. All of our other shows. So those you can [e-mail] really excited. Come see us at all of our shows, especially the crappies on February 1st. I mean, we have, I think. I think like three quarters of the. The theaters already sold out, so you don't wait too much longer. And then. And we're really excited for our first Vegas show. And I. We're hop two more cities to add to the tour, but that won't be until the new year because, you know, everyone's going. Everyone's shutting down next week. So in the meantime, they're shutting down already.

[Ronnie Karam]

Have you been out into the world? I don't even. I can't even believe that it's not yet. Here's what people are doing on the road. They're just like, I'm done. It's Christmas. They're like, literally, it's like it's robots driving into trees is what it looks like. People just driving all over the road. It's. Is anybody even there anymore? Today there was a checkout lady. I think she tried to scan my head at the store. I was like, girl, we just all need to quit our jobs because it's over for all of us. And I feel bad for anyone listening to this podcast right now, because this is gonna be mayhem. Cause one of our last things we're doing this week, we're doing this. Yeah, we're doing this. And then we're gonna do a summer house trailer trash for next week and probably a bonus. So we'll be here all day still recording. But it is gonna be Looney Tunes. Cause we know this is it for a while.

[Ben Mandelker]

There will not be. There won't be a Potomac recap on Monday because this way we can recap our. Our episode today and we can take Monday off. So we're doing that summer house thing. But of course, you know, the big news was with Potomac is Karen Huger. So I think when you were talking about people driving and driving all over the road, I'm like, are you sure you just weren't near Karen Huger?

[Ronnie Karam]

It's just everybody has dropped the mic already. It's like work is already done for everybody. They're just done. But the Karen Huger thing, we Won't be Potomac recap, but we did do a mini recap of her arrest story that's on our TikTok and our Instagram and our YouTube. So that should be up now. So go check that out for, for our take on that stuff.

[Ben Mandelker]

And speaking of that, also, this is, I swear this is not just candid ploy to make you guys follow us on social media. Although, you know, feel free to. But speaking of the crappies, we mentioned it all week, but just now, our first story. Our first thing is up. We are. We want your input about story moments of the year. TV moments of the year. So anything on Bravo Traders. Also love island usa. We want your TV moments of the year. So write it on a comment on the post that it's up on our Instagram and there'll be further posts going up over the course of the week. We really just need you guys to help us jog our memories. So that way when we start making the initial ballot, it'll be easier for us and we don't leave anything out.

[Ronnie Karam]

Okay, let's get on with the show, shall we? Southern Charm Season 10 Episode 3 Gone to the Dogs My first thought, God, the music on this show really is top notch. And we say it every season. They go above and beyond. I mean, you know, in old movies how you see, you see movies about how old movies were being made and you see basically a whole orchestra that just sitting there playing with the movie as it goes, you know, scoring it live. That's how the show really feels. And whoever is playing the instrument that goes adoing. What instrument is that? I forget what that's called.

[Ben Mandelker]

Percussion.

[Ronnie Karam]

Adoing. Yeah, it's like a specific thing. Who plays that? Because they deserve a Grammy award. They're so talented with it. They did such a good job in this episode. And that's like JT's instrument, you know how they have like Peter and the Wolf and every character has its own instrument or whatever. Like someone's the flute and then, you know, whatever. Jt, is that doing so good? You guys are doing so good on this music. So, so good.

[Ben Mandelker]

Also, another thing. So this episode, Gone to the Dogs, you know, Lisa Vanderpump gets credit for being like the dog lady of Bravo. But the truth is, I don't know if there's any show that has more over the top dog events than Southern Charm. I mean, we've had weddings, we birthday parties. I feel like every year there's some sort of like pageant or talent show or like, you know, WWE Doggy wrestling moment. Like, there's always some sort of crazy dog event on this show at all times.

[Ronnie Karam]

But I think Lisa Vanderpump still wins the dog thing because this show isn't really trying to stop dogs from being turned into quesadillas. And Lisa Vanderpump is really big on, you know, keeping dogs out of the Subway sandwich shop, so I think that she wins. But, yeah, I. I love a good big dog event.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. Because they all have dogs. There were so many dogs. I don't think I've ever seen so many dogs on screen on Bravo ever. That includes Lisa's, you know, dog. Various dog events where James lost, like, or James. James was DJing. It was like, did anyone lose their Toyota Camry keys? Hello.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

So big dog energy here. But before we get into that, we start with small dog energy. It's not an opening montage unless we see Vanita doing something around her household while Charles watches. And in today's episode, it's her steaming her curtains and then steaming her pajamas and Charles looking as if, like, can we ever go outside?

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, have fun with your burnt nipples. That's what I have to say, because I've tried to steam with my clothes on, too, and that never works out for me. And I have little tiny nipples. They've turned into, like, little toaster. Toaster dots. And it's not fun because I have steamed my nipples. Okay. Not steamed them, but, you know, you hit them with the iron part in your shirt. That's not good. But I like that this show is still just reminding us that Vanita's here every episode at the beginning. And then we never hear from her again. Like, the last episode, she at least had a scene where she was talking to JT about how she wanted to go to lunch with him and stuff. But mostly it's like, here's Vanita steaming something, and then that's it. You really never hear another beep.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

We see Taylor's our resident dog talker to her.

[Ben Mandelker]

I know. And then we have Taylor and Gaston. They're in her backyard. She has leaves everywhere. So he's come over with a leaf blower, and he's gonna get to work. I felt a little robbed. I felt like there were so many leaves. I was like, I kind of want to see those leaves get blown around. I kind of want to see what happens, you know?

[Ronnie Karam]

Oh, he wanted the end of the storyline.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, I wanted to see. There were so many leaves. I wanted to see all the leaves go up in the air.

[Ronnie Karam]

And, like, I opened. They established a shot with the leaves, but then they didn't show you what happened to the leaves. And so you feel it was like Chekhov's gun. It's like Chekhov's leaves. You're like, what the hell the leaves need to be.

[Ben Mandelker]

I felt like it was very much Chekhov's leaves. I felt like you sort of have said, like, here, look at this beautiful snow globe made of leaves. Now we're gonna shake it up and that's it. We don't get to see. I was like. I wanted to. I felt like it was probably so satisfying to blow all those leaves around. Cause I respect Chekov's leaf blower.

[Ronnie Karam]

You can't introduce a leaf blower and not have it finish the job. Come on, man, this is drama.

[Ben Mandelker]

Seriously? Seriously.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, I will say this. My suspicion is that Gaston's just a user, piece of trash douchebag. Because all we've seen of him.

[Ben Mandelker]

What gives you that impression?

[Ronnie Karam]

He's named after the Beauty and the Beast character. I don't care what anybody says from Europe. Okay? You're you. That is a very common name where you're from in America. He's a douchebag. I'm sorry, that's just how it is. Especially when he was born. At the time he was born, if his parents are American born parents, then those are people who named him after the character Gaston, which destined him to be a douchebag, period. That's just it. You guys can argue with me all you want, but that is just the end of my story. So anyway, Gaston's a douchebag just because of that. And also because he just kind of dates everybody who's TV adjacent trying to get on these shows, and here he is now. That said, I would like to kind of hedge my bet. Well, okay, look, here's this. He's probably a douchebag, but, you know, he's a douchebag that I would keep in my house because he comes over with a leaf blower. And you know what? You can use me, but if you're also doing services, then I feel it's fair.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, you know, that's another reason why we needed to see the conclusion of the scene is because we need to see how well he leaf blows. Because if he's just coming around and just moving the leads from one side to the next, then he's actually not useful at all. Then it's just a prop to earn to win over people who are just happy that someone's doing a chore. But, like, if he's not doing the tour. Well, then that's not going to be worthwhile. I mean, Gaston, he has, he has made an impression on two different Bravo shows already because obviously his debut off camera was on Southern Hospitality, which is also where we had Sally's debut. And then today is Sally's big episode. And by the way, I just want to say I really enjoy Sally on Southern Charm way more than on Southern Hospitality. I think this was a good move for her.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, she didn't get to do anything on Southern Hospitality. She showed up, got slut shamed, and got sent away and that was pretty much it for her for her job there. She showed up as someone who banged Joe Bradley and then he told her off because she also banged somebody else within like, what, a 24 hour period.

[Ben Mandelker]

That he knew, like, didn't Gaston live downstairs?

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, it was Gaston that he. That she banged at that time. Right. So it was.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

Oh, God, yeah. Sally. I mean, Sally was just making it to every Bravo show. She was just looking at production schedules, just sewing up and doing what needed to be done. But yeah, they slut shamed her and then she was out. And I felt like that was unfair, you know, and she also, she not only got slut shamed, but she got guilted about disrespecting Joe's grandma's parmesan because she taught him how to cook chicken parmesan. Wasn't it that he cooked his grandma's special chicken parmesan for Sally and then.

[Ben Mandelker]

She did this to him, like chicken parmesan. His nanny's chicken parmesan.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. So there you go.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, you know what? You know what I like to think it was? Since I recently saw a little movie, a little indie movie called Wicked. I like to think that she showed up on Southern Hospitality and then basically Michelle Yeoh was like, wait a second, you're special. We're gonna give you. I'm going to teach you privately and put you onto Southern charm. I'm gonna put you on the varsity level show. That's what happened.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, let's.

[Ben Mandelker]

She wasn't slut shamed. She was just chosen to advance to a better show. Well, actually, maybe not better show, a bigger show. So either way, leaf blowing, unsatisfying for me. Then we go to Molly on the treadmill and she's running and she's like, I sound like a dying pig. And then finally we land at JT's apartment where he takes an insulin shot and then he sits down to write a letter to Patricia. I found this scene, so stressful. I was so stressed out by the scene by, like, it was like a combination of things. It was his handwriting. It was like, why are you writing so big? You have limited amount of space. Why did you not, like, draft this ahead of time on, like, your laptop and then transcribe it? Like, all your word choices are so bad. Your handwriting is bad. Just like, oh, the whole thing would get. Made me want to crawl out of my skin.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. It was just so cringy because it's just one of those, like, soap opera scenes which we see on these shows sometime with people who really don't have anybody in their lives. I mean, we see it with Garcelle a lot. Like this week when she was like, oh, here I am on the Internet looking at the credits of my new film where I'm an executive producer, which touches me so deeply. I wish my mother was here right now to watch me squeeze out this solitary tear. Wah, wah, wah, wah. And JT's having that scene right now by himself where he's like, well, I guess I should take some insulin. Geez. Now I must write a letter to Ms. Patricia. Here I am taking a pen and putting it to paper. Who knows how to write a letter anymore? How shall I go about such a thing? Come on, guys, really. This is what we fall into on this show. And poor guy cannot write. He does not know how to string English together. And I blame George Bush. Who do you blame for the education system just taking a turn for the worst?

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, I'm gonna blame the first good old Internet, by the way. First George Bush. Wow.

[Ronnie Karam]

It goes back a long way, guys. It's been a long process. It has turned us into morons.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, I think you could blame the inventor of the Internet, Al Gore, the inventor of the. Because it was. It's the rise of the laptops and whatnot. Actually, you could probably blame Bill Gates, too, because.

[Ronnie Karam]

How about marijuana? How marijuana?

[Ben Mandelker]

I have to say cursive. Yeah. I have not written in cursive in so long. You know, we spent so much time learning cursive only to discard it. Oh, man. But, yeah, I don't know who did this, but they're all to blame. Everyone's to blame for this. So he is. He's just writing these things like, hey, I'm sorry for being an ignorant male. No, no, no. Okay, I'm going to start with all caps. So he writes deer in all caps. Like, why are you doing that? Why are you screaming deer? He's like, no, no, it's offensive. Don't overthink it. Okay.

[Ronnie Karam]

What is Karen driving down the road? That's what anyone in the car with dare. With. With Karen screams, dear, dear. Whoops. Whoops. Get out of the road.

[Ben Mandelker]

Please accept this apology for my lack of respect at the Carolina Code. So. Sure. Okay. That's a good first line. And then he goes. And then he starts, like, saying, my intent was meant. My intent. Oh, God. A tent was meant. Intent. Oh, God. It doesn't make sense. What do I write? I'm like, just right. Dear Miss Patricia, I am terribly sorry that I offended you. You know, what I did was totally disrespectful. It was an attempt to welcome you in on a joke, but I think. But it went way wrong, and it was not worth it in the end. And any joke that you have to explain is not a good joke. And please accept my humble apologies.

[Ronnie Karam]

And my intent was meant as a sign of inclusion and solidarity. What the fuck?

[Ben Mandelker]

That's not.

[Ronnie Karam]

That's.

[Ben Mandelker]

That is not method. Inclusion is solidarity. That is not what you say. It makes no sense.

[Ronnie Karam]

It's so stupid. He's just idiotic. And the fact that he even sent this is more idiotic because most people. People would have the brain to be like, this is terrible. I'm gonna write this first. I'm gonna type this out, and then I'm gonna write it and send it. I mean, come on, bro. But he didn't. That he knew it was so bad and still sent it is sad because she could forgive somebody who did something stupid, but she can't forgive an idiot, and she will never withstand.

[Ben Mandelker]

Exactly.

[Ronnie Karam]

You know, Exactly. He's a dummy. So he's like. But admittedly. Wait, is that too much? Siri, how do I spell admittedly crazy? It's a hilarious scene, and he didn't know how to spell it. So with warm regards, JT Is basically it. So then we go with Shep.

[Ben Mandelker]

And it's all scrunched up in the bottom too, by the way, because the first two lines wrote in gigantic handwriting. And then he had to squeeze in the. With warm regards, the bottom. It was just so childlike.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

Stressful. So sorry.

[Ronnie Karam]

This sad stuff that's happening on this show. So Shep. Shep and little Craig are getting some food, and he orders his dog human food at the restaurant. He just orders the dog a meal. Which Bueller. No, Bueller is not gonna ever get. I'll be like, are you hungry, honey? Here's a stick that I found on the ground. Enjoy that. Have you ever Had a straw.

[Ben Mandelker]

It's delicious.

[Ronnie Karam]

Try it. You should taste that.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. So they order food and Austin comes over and he's like, hey, by the way, what's your. What's your name, waitress? And she's like, madison. He goes, that's insane right now. Your name is Madison. Also, he laughs. When he laughs, the mouth, the full mouth is open and he puts the tongue right in the middle.

[Ronnie Karam]

This scene was a rough Austin scene because his entire mouth never stopped. His tongue just kept popping out of his mouth and his mouth kept like. Like he was eating something kind of. But he wasn't. Yeah, like the food hadn't come yet. He was just doing like stage eating the whole time for some reason on the show. It was so obnoxious. It was hard to watch.

[Ben Mandelker]

It was just like, he's doing extra work.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, it's just. What are you doing? Yeah. It seemed like someone said, okay, you're just standing around a party eating a sandwich. And he's just like, of course, eating it very impolitely, as he does. Only on this show do I say things like impolitely. Who gives a fuck? It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin's commercial.

[Ben Mandelker]

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[Ronnie Karam]

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[Ronnie Karam]

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[Ronnie Karam]

Okay, so anyway, so Chef's like, oh, gosh, I'm sorry. It's just there's. There's history with the name Madison here. You guys have fucked over women of every single name. Okay, there's not a waitress in the world that hasn't had a name of somebody that you haven't fucked over. So stop acting like you're uncomfortable with this particular one. Jesus Christ. What do you have a conniption fit every time you pass a keychain rack with names on it? You fucked over every name in the name dictionary.

[Ben Mandelker]

So. So Austin's like. You know, there used to be a time where, like, the name, like, triggered me. Like, you know, and that was just like, no way to live. But, like, sometimes I think about, like, I think about, like, the joy and the peace that. That Audrey brings me, which I've never had before. Ha ha ha.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, well, it's easier with a 20 year old, you fuckwit. Oh, I know. So I love. I felt like this was a gift to us. You know, it's the audience, but especially me and Ben, because this is our favorite thing about Austin. Madison, Madison and Madison. And we got a full Madison montage of Austin squeezing his wiener going, madison, you're staying right now. And then just.

[Ben Mandelker]

It was a Madison. It was an exasperated Madison montage.

[Ronnie Karam]

It was our favorite. So editor, thank you. I took it personally. I took it as a gift. And thank you. I know it's delusional, but I don't even care. I loved it. So then we see a flashback of Audrey and Austin having lunch. I mean, these two are so meant to be together. Because Austin's like, well, you have big, big brown eyes. Like a little baby dear. Oh, God, get out of the road. Sorry, that was dangerous.

[Ben Mandelker]

And she's like, tries.

[Ronnie Karam]

Karen just drives through it. She's like a deer. And he goes, yeah. Searching for the nearest espresso martini.

[Ben Mandelker]

So then it didn't make any sense. Then we go back to lunch and Austin's like. He's like, so what's going on, dude? Like, what's going on with you in Siena? Oh, gosh, I really like her. She's got this amazing, you know, about her. And we see pics. I know. Then we see pics of them all together and they're, you know, their food arrives and everything. And. And he's like. But I. I do think about the future with her. 100%. I think about how many times I could yell at her over backyard games. Oh, my God, it'll be great.

[Ronnie Karam]

I'm sure she sees a future with you too. A future of cleaning your ass and helping you downstairs, you old bastard. Okay? And you know that worry you see about her, it's called youth. It's like a Video game. When you're dying and you're looking around for something that's pulsing with any kind of life that you could swallow to give you a little bit more. Yeah, you're that aura, okay? That's what you're seeing. You're seeing the glow of a Medi Pack in Call of Duty.

[Ben Mandelker]

You're. I think you're seeing the glow of someone who's gorgeous, who could be modeling for Banana Republic, who's actually decided to, like, actually look your way and. And has not been discussed by you yet. That's the glow you're seeing.

[Ronnie Karam]

And Austin's like, that's great, bro. And he's like, I mean, look, we've been lucky enough to have many wonderful girls come through our lives. To all the girls I've carsed before who've traveled in and carsed my doors, it's just not exciting anymore. And I'll say that, you know, just like a new conquest or whatever, it just isn't. And you know, Shep is really leaning into his, like, just an innocent little boy thing because his eyes are wide open. This whole episode where he's like, this girl's just so sweet. Golly gee, what could I do to make her happy?

[Ben Mandelker]

Gosh. And. And they're also doing this like. Like having this faux moment of having any sort of perspective on life because Austin's like, yeah, like, especially, like, if you have to, like, a string of those, like, wonderful girls like you just, like, wake up feeling emptier than ever, man. I'm like, well, if they're so wonderful, why do you have a string of them then? Why don't you just, like, end with your wonderful one? So Shep is like, yeah, that's what we were missing in our friendship before. We were too scared to be vulnerable. So these two numb numb nuts are, like, going through the paces of pop psychology to explain away why they've been fucked. Boys, they just weren't vulnerable before, but now they are vulnerable, which means that they've just so happened to found two gorgeous 20 negative 22 year olds who is now the culmination of their personal development.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Some people think vulnerability isn't manly.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, that.

[Ronnie Karam]

Okay, now you're gonna be vulnerable because you found a Miss Bahamas. You fucking. Give me a break, bro.

[Ben Mandelker]

Sir, you are the one who's invertible, invulnerable. You're the one who's mocking Craig for his saying, et cetera. I mean, like, say what you will about Craig. I do think Craig is pretty vulnerable. I mean, he's a complete liar, but he's vulnerable, you know, to.

[Ronnie Karam]

To Nigerian email scams. I mean, what are you talking about?

[Ben Mandelker]

You don't think Craig's vulnerable? I think. I think it takes some vulnerability to say. To go on to a show that's, like, very old school and say, like, I want to sew for the rest of my life. I think that's like. Because he got mocked relentlessly for it. And then, you know, now he's showing everyone, you know, now he's making money off of it. But maybe it's not emotionally vulnerable. It's just that he opened himself up for mockery. Is that still vulnerable then? Maybe that's just.

[Ronnie Karam]

I think. I think. I look at. Craig is just one of the trickier people because he's. He's more manipulative. Like, he's better at manipulating than everybody else. Craig's still a monster. I love that people are so snowed by Craig, you know, because he's so fucking charming and adorable. And he is. His. His good qualities, I think are really good. I think they outweigh his bad that we've seen on the show. But his bad are pretty bad too. It wasn't that long ago that he was on Winter House throwing his cash at people going, I'm too rich to clean, and my parents were maids. I'm not cleaning another thing. That was literally five minutes. So I mean, everybody is so quick to forget on Bravo. But I'm not. I'm that elephant who trampled the old lady in the village. Oh, we got an email from one of our recappers, Shelby, which was so funny. And I didn't even write back, which was so rude. So consider this your right back, Shelby. But she was like, oh, I wanted to update you on that story about the elephant who trampled. Who was trampled by. I wanted to update you on that story about the old lady that was trampled by the elephant whose son that she killed. This old lady killed an elephant's kid, and the elephant trampled the old lady. Okay? She goes. So I want to follow up. Not only did she. Did she trample the old lady, she showed up at her funeral and trampled everybody at the funeral, too. Isn't that good? I want to post her that fucking elephant. Okay.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, that elephant is really.

[Ronnie Karam]

It's an amazing elephant.

[Ben Mandelker]

The elephant will be played by Madeline Stowe, I feel like.

[Ronnie Karam]

So anyway. But, yeah, vulnerable or not, they're gonna talk shit about Craig now. So the guys are chef's like, I mean, I'M vulnerable, and nobody wants to be vulnerable. I mean, look at Craig. He's never even confided in you about Paige, for example. Oh, yeah. Okay, so that means that Paige is less. Craig is less vulnerable than you, who's been vulnerable for five minutes. Okay, then I changed my answer before. Craig is definitely 100 times more vulnerable than any of the other guys on this show.

[Ben Mandelker]

I just. Because Craig does not share his personal life with two toxic twits who will use any shred against him to bring him down. Because there are two crabs with crabs in a bucket does not mean that he's invulnerable. It just means he's selective.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

And he's smart about who he shares with.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. So then Austin's like, he hasn't talked to me. Hasn't talked to me about anything. Not recently. You know, he's extremely wrapped up, Craig, and he's like. He's reclusive. You know, he's like Howard Hughes. Yeah. Playboy, Right? No. Vietnam War. No. Does he own the. Does he own the. The. The. The things like the IHOPs? No, that's Howard Johnson's. I don't know. God, I'm hungry. Can I get a Grand Slam?

[Ben Mandelker]

Oh, is he like. Oh, he goes around. He quacks a lot. No, that's Howard the Duck.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Austin's like, you're right, you know, because, like, Craig used to be the first call. Like, he was. He was like the first call McCall is. But, like, now, like, he doesn't even answer the phone. And, like, I'm. I miss him. I miss him.

[Ben Mandelker]

No, I miss him. You don't miss him.

[Ronnie Karam]

Can we just start focusing on Austin above the nose? Can we just have the camera there? Can we just have Austin be, like, the neighbor on the neighbor on Home Improvement? So he's just always behind a fence. Because I can't watch that mouth moving anymore. I can't.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, it's just. It's very distracting. It's just, like, a lot of circles and pointy things coming at you. So Shep is like. I just feel like he's trying to curate an image, like he's starring in his own commercial. You know what I mean, Mike? Yeah. He literally is doing that. We. That's, like, what we saw. The season opens with him. Like, flashbacks of him holding pillows because he's literally shooting a commercial. He's starring in his own commercial because he has a business that he needs a commercial for. It makes sense.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Austin's like, you know, it's kind of like Like a big old man PR move. Like, if you see with the beer in his hand, like, he thinks they're like, his whole business is going down. His whole business is going down. And he's like, yeah, well, you remember when he was on Adderall to the gills at that time, and he lied about everything? Basically, yeah. It's called getting your shit together. Like, it's funny that Shep is still, all these years later, trying to bring somebody down instead of doing literally anything for himself. Nothing. Have you done anything to go to a community college, learn to do something, like, make an effort, like, leave Craig alone, for Christ's sake.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, this. This argument is such a funny argument to me. They're like, God, look at Craig. It's like he's trying to curate this image of himself. We all know what he's really like, because remember when he used to do Adderall up to, like, his eyeballs, it's like, yeah, this is someone who's like, oh, shit, I'm doing too much Adderall. I got to turn things around. Like, why would you turn things around? Gosh.

[Ronnie Karam]

I mean, Craig's not. Craig's not vulnerable like us. I mean, he quit drinking. He quit doing drugs. He's got a job and a career and a steady girlfriend.

[Ben Mandelker]

What a loser.

[Ronnie Karam]

Course. Of course.

[Ben Mandelker]

And Austin's, like, tells us the thing about Craig is he has worn so many hats. Meanwhile, Austin, by the way, has fallen into some sort of, like, tanning bed because he looks. I don't know what's going on with his skin, but it's like he is. He's turned into a big patch of leather. So he's like. He's like. He's worn so many hats. He used to run around the King street and drink, like, so many Jaeger bombs, like, vodka Red Bulls. And then he's like, oh, I want to be a lawyer. Okay. And then he's, like, trying to be like, oh, I'm Martha Stewart. It's like, at least he had a hat to wear. We're still. We're still trying to find some felt so we can patch something on top of your Tucker Carlson hair.

[Ronnie Karam]

It is really funny, though, seeing Craig's TikTok. So making fun of how everything's business now. We just see one of Craig's commercials, and he's like, our bedding is, like, so soft. It's handpicked by me. Yeah. Cheese boards. Big beverage dispensers. Look, I'm gonna pop something in my mouth. Ow. All right, well, I shouldn't have tried that one. That was a beer can. That hurt. Can we do that one over again? Craig, get your TikTok stupid. Okay, I won't publish it.

[Ben Mandelker]

No. To be fair, Craig is definitely leaning into this. Like, look at me. I'm sweet. Nice, Craig. I love Christmas. I love pillows. I love candlesticks. I love curtains. I love candlesticks. I love curtains. I love Craig. Craig, stop it. Stop, Stop. It's over. The tic tac's over, Craig.

[Ronnie Karam]

Okay. Love you, chicken. Love you too, Craig. I love candlesticks. Craig. So Austin's just like, I miss my buddy dude. I miss him. That's the one thing I miss. My buddy dude.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, he's like, you know, Martha Stewart is like, best friends with Snoop Dogg, and Martha Stewart's been to jail. Martha Stewart's cool as Craig just wants to sell spatulas with, like, a nutcracker on them. I'm like, it's better than whatever the hell trop hop is these days.

[Ronnie Karam]

So they, you know, they're like, well, Craig doesn't like us anymore is basically the thing. So Shep calls Craig, and he gets sent right to voicemail. And then we go to Craig and Pages, and Craig is skimming the pool. Whatever Craig did in that backyard is fantastic. I have to say, that looks amazing. As someone who's currently trying to get a deck finished, you know, today's the last day of my deck. All the guys are out there right now.

[Ben Mandelker]

There's a whole team.

[Ronnie Karam]

There's a Russian team, Filipino team. There's a Hispanic team. All the guys are out there today. It's like, literally corners of the. Of all the. All the world back there working their ass off doing this deck. We're doing lighting. We're doing all this stuff. It is hard, okay? It is hard. And I saw Craig's, and I was like, wow, that is stunning. Like, how does he do that? I'm broke. Like, I'm literally broke. And mine is going to be possibly mediocre if I try really hard. How do you do that? His is like the Garden of fucking Eden, bro. Whatever. I want that. Well, Craig, come over. I'm sorry what I said earlier about you about being a douchebag and throwing your money at people. Come on, put some plants out for me, babe.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, first of all, it's probably 10 times cheaper in Charleston. Second of all, that's pretty much it.

[Ronnie Karam]

Okay, so then he's with Paige, and this scene is the funniest thing because Paige is just sitting at the pool dressed like she's in. Hello, darling. I mean, she looks adorable. And she, you know, she always looks adorable. It's good to see Paige on tv. It's been a while.

[Ben Mandelker]

I love Paige because summer house ended.

[Ronnie Karam]

A while ago and I just haven't seen her in a while. And it's good to see her. She's so cute. So she was sitting. She's sitting there on the phone. Huh?

[Ben Mandelker]

She's so good.

[Ronnie Karam]

Even though. Scowling at her phone. She's scowling at her phone and just swiping like a teenager. And he's like, hey, babe, I'm skimming the pool. Great. Isn't this nice, babe? Yeah. You know what? Me and Paige, like, we used to, like, party and stuff, but, like, why would we even need to? Because now we just, like, hang out together. We're so happy just being together. Hey, honey, what do you want to do later? Shut up, Craig. Love you, babe. Right.

[Ben Mandelker]

Okay, Paige. Paige looks absolutely thrilled to be sitting there. She's like, wow, this is great. I spent my weekends in a remote house in eastern Long island, sitting by a pool while an idiot wanders around. And now I come down here to sit by a pool in a remote location while an idiot wanders around a pool. Thanks. Not like I need to do things like go shopping or be around civilization. Thanks, Greg. Thank. I enjoy it back here.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Craig's like, you know, there's a corner of the green that's a little dirty. Should I blow it off? No. We have such a sanctuary here. Shut up, Craig. So Madison comes over. Craig, oh, my gosh. Look at me and Paige. Paige, look at us. And they're in the matching bikini with COVID up thing.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, they're wearing the same outfit. And Paige is just so happy that there's someone that's not Craig to talk to. She's like, oh, my God, Thank God you're here. I was losing my mind. Do you know how many questions I've had to answer about skimming pools?

[Ronnie Karam]

It is really funny because she's on her phone. She won't even look at Craig that whole time. He's like, love you, honey. She's like, whatever, shut up, Craig. And then Madison comes in and she just immediately swipes down her phone and puts it down. She's like, so what's the goss? Let's talk, guys. She comes to life. It's so funny. It's like someone plugged her in and she's like, okay, I'm back to life. Stupid's done. Craig, stop talking.

[Ben Mandelker]

Great.

[Ronnie Karam]

Madison, fill me in.

[Ben Mandelker]

Also, I am, like, forever, like, charmed by how Craig loves to see if Paige is happy about something. So, like, when Madison walks in, he immediately pivots around and looks at Paige with a big smile, being like, I bet she's smiling. He's like. And he's like. He's like, oh, my God, she's smiling. He does this all the time.

[Ronnie Karam]

This was so funny, too, because they're literally like, are you ready to hang out? And they're like, yeah, let's hang out. And so the girls take off their coverups, and then Craig takes off his shirt, and then they just stand there in the same positions. Okay, we're ready. We're hanging out now, guys. We've removed some clothing. Let's talk. So they start chatting, and Paige starts ordering him around for pasta salad and stuff. So then he pulls out a pasta.

[Ben Mandelker]

Salad out of nowhere. By the way, that was like, Food Network. She was like, craig, you can bring out the pasta salad. He's like, okay. And he, like, reaches down and a pasta salad just, like, materializes, like, what? Where'd that come from?

[Ronnie Karam]

So he's like, well, I told Paige about Patricia's. Oh, girl. It's like, I'm just saying, like, JT's saying crazy shit. The only sentence that Craig said to me was like, oh, my God. JT said to people. Like, jt and Madison hooked up. And I go, no one thinks that. Genuinely, that's insane.

[Ben Mandelker]

I mean, hey, he's a troll, for God's sake. Look at him. And Paige is like. I mean, you're like someone's mom. Like, they're hot mob with great taste in fashion and wife.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, well, you know him. He was a friend of mine for a minute. But him talking about my. My marriage, that feels like a. That feels like a tossing of the corn. It's a slap in the face. I won't have it. You ain't gonna disrespect my boyfriend, and you ain't gonna disrespect corn.

[Ben Mandelker]

Like, who gave him the audacity to say anything about anyone? I mean, admittedly, that's what I do all the time on my show, but I also, like, am cute, and he's, like, a troll. And so Madison's like, yeah, well, wrong person, my friend. Okay, haven't you been around this group? You know, like, don't come knocking at my door. Like, literally, don't come knock on my door, otherwise, I'm gonna have my husband beat you in the face.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, anyway, he'll have to have you And Brett and Hudson, come over and swim. We'll have to have you. And Craig's like, yeah, how are you? And she's like, great. But, you know, Brett has. She just drops. It's like, well, you know, I could. You know, he's got thyroid cancer. They're like, what? She's like, yeah, I know. But, you know, she's saying, you don't just want everybody, especially people in this group, really involved in your. You know, And I guess I don't.

[Ben Mandelker]

Craig apparently already knew, but I guess he had forgotten to tell Paige because remember chicken? He had cancer, which is such a strange sentence to say. Remember chicken?

[Ronnie Karam]

No.

[Ben Mandelker]

Did you not know?

[Ronnie Karam]

She goes, no, but it also could have been something that he was telling her. Like, babe, did you know that Brett had cancer? Oh, my God, that's terrible. While she's just scrolling through her phone. You know what I mean?

[Ben Mandelker]

It's like, babe, these. These trees keep, like, putting leaves in the pool. And I'm just like, skimming and skimming, and that's great, Craig. And skimming. And Brett has cancer, and I'm just like, oh, my God, so many leaves in the pool. That's great, Craig. He just inserts it in.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, Just drops it in there somewhere.

[Ben Mandelker]

Credit Karma is your evolved financial assistant.

[Ronnie Karam]

Making managing your finances simpler and more tailored to you. Join [e-mail] to start your personalized financial.

[Ben Mandelker]

Journey today and continue to grow with our innovations. Credit Karma, evolve your finances. Hello, ladies and germs, boys and girls. The Grinch is back again to ruin your Christmas season with Tis the Grinch Holiday Podcast. After last year, he's learned a thing or two about hosting, and he's ready to rant against Christmas cheer and roast his celebrity guests like chestnuts on an open fire. You can listen with the whole family as guest stars like Jon Hamm, Brittney Broski, and Danny DeVito try to persuade the mean old Grinch that there's a lot to love about the insufferable holiday season. But that's not all. Somebody stole all the children of Whoville's letters to Santa, and everybody thinks the Grinch is responsible. It's a real who, Bill? Who done it? Can Cindy Lou and Max help clear the Grinch's name? Grab your hot cocoa and cozy slippers to find out, follow Tis the Grinch Holiday Podcast on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. Unlock weekly Christmas mystery bonuses content and listen to every episode ad free by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery app. Spotify Or Apple podcasts. So Madison says that keeping something like that private was necessary because she just didn't want all that outside. Outside noise. But he's okay now, and he's gonna be taking medication for the rest of his life, and he's in remission, and it's just been, like, a shitty couple of months. And so Madison says that's why with jt, after hearing what he's saying about us was like. I was like, I don't want to associate with my guy. This is like. It's like succotash. It's like an affront to corn.

[Ronnie Karam]

Last thing, I made some weasel in the middle of it all. Like, this is real life. I'm going through real life. Paige is like, how dare he insinuate that you might find him attractive? This is disgusting. I mean, what's her. Okay, pretend I'm Barbara Walters. Okay, this is a microphone. What made you cry harder? Finding out your boyfriend has cancer or JT thinking that you would sleep with him? Be honest.

[Ben Mandelker]

Honestly, it was that one. That was hard. It's hard to think, am I losing my looks? Does he think I'm down at his level now? So.

[Ronnie Karam]

While she is completely in the right, she just really goes so low. Like, it becomes so mean that I'm like, oh, God, poor jt. I mean, it really is just like. I mean, he's ugly. He's disgusting. What is he trying to do, chase children off of his bridge? I mean, Jesus Christ, what a troll. Oh, disgusting. Yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

JT's in a bad place because he. You know the old phrase, the opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference. And I feel like everyone seems kind of just like a little indifferent to him. Like, ugh, whatever. He's like, they're, like, dismissing him. They're not like, I hate jt. I mean, even though she just said it, do you get the sense, like, they have closed the gates on jt? It's not like there's feuds. They've just basically said, yeah, you've. You tried to come on to our show. You mess it up. So we're going to. You can go now. Yeah, that's hard. You can't come back from that. You can't come back.

[Ronnie Karam]

And it's not only, like, you know, you were a jerk for saying something. It's like, you're a jerk for even having the audacity to think I would ever be attracted to someone as ugly as you, which is just like, yikes. I mean, that's.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yikes.

[Ronnie Karam]

That takes it To a different level where I'm like, please don't make me feel bad for JT because that's not the spot I. I think you want the audience to be in at this point. Like, you guys are on the level where you're getting what you want, but don't take it so far that everybody's going to switch around and then feel sorry for jt, you know?

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. Because I was actually, by the end of the episode, I was kind of feeling sorry for him. I was like, damn, cuz he's cuz Greg really his up, right? Because, yeah, like this. This stuff with Madison is so stupid. Like, he shouldn't have even. Like, he's ridiculous for even thinking it's. But Craig going around saying that JT called Patricia a. Like, that's like character assassination right there. And he's not going to be able to come back from that ever. Like, the. The well has been poisoned, if that's a phrase. So.

[Ronnie Karam]

So now let's go to Wolfgang. It's a dog store. It's a dog store. Guys, don't worry. No one's playing the piano here, okay? No one is playing the piano. So it's. It's the most effervescent gaze of our lives. Rodrigo and Tyler, let's do it. Let's do this, guys. Let's do it.

[Ben Mandelker]

Smells delicious in here.

[Ronnie Karam]

Thank you. It's a secret. Oh, no, it's the lady who works there.

[Ben Mandelker]

She goes.

[Ronnie Karam]

Thank you. It's a secret. It's wet dog hair. Y'all get it, right? Your gays. And they're like, that's so funny. So we're having a 13th birthday party for our dog Bella. So we wanted some treats we could serve them. Do you have cakes? We do peanut butter, oats, doggy dog, dog, dog, dog, wet hair cakes. We can try that again. You got any money, gay? Laughter no. Okay, well, you're taking the fun right out of the word gay, aren't you? It just means homosexuals now, doesn't it? Okay, well, I'll just stick with that then.

[Ben Mandelker]

Tyler and I have been together for nine years, and we've been asked about a million times if we're going to have children, mainly from Patricia. I think her exact words are, well, we know Whitney ain't dropping any sperm anytime soon, so what about you two gays? And I said, listen, no, just dogs.

[Ronnie Karam]

So he's like, he finds a little cowboy hat for a dog and he's like, this is because we're gonna have an inspiration with Dolly Parton. So we're gonna have our party called Doggy Parton. And she's like, oh, that is the least gay name I've ever heard anybody come up with. I mean, you even made Dolly Parton sound unfun. Can I find fun or gays? Okay. Okay. You can order a tiny, tiny cowboy hat. I'm gonna go here on Postmates and see if I can order some fun gays. Okay, let's see what gets here quicker.

[Ben Mandelker]

Tyler and I, I think we're really happy with just adopting senior dogs. That's where we shine. But we see an adorable picture. Oh, yeah, let me. Here's an adorable picture of Bella and Bo. They require not as much attention as children. So, I mean, we're a good. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Doggy. Pardon?

[Ronnie Karam]

We're really into senior dogs. You know, like, it's really fun, like, playing with them for a minute, but it's really good when you get to put them down. Like, what I've never heard of a fixation of. I mean, it's nice. It's nice, right? But it's. It's also, like, what. I've just never heard of that. We're really into adopting senior dogs.

[Ben Mandelker]

I haven't heard that either. I'm wondering, though, My first thought was that he. He. They're saying they're into old dogs, but then I'm wondering because they say in a little bit about how, like, their dog, basically, they adopted it from an elderly lady who couldn't take care of her dog anymore. So maybe they adopt dogs from seniors.

[Ronnie Karam]

Oh, that's cute. And that's.

[Ben Mandelker]

I don't know.

[Ronnie Karam]

That is actually nice because. Yeah, they did. They did say that they. They adopted this from an older woman who passed away. That is actually really cute.

[Ben Mandelker]

My first thought was, though, like, an old dog with, like, a cane. Or it could be, like, dogs that are best.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, they're like, we really, like. Here's what. Here's what I really like. I like a dog that snores really loudly all day, which I have to say, you know, Bueller's in that era right now. He's. Well, he was born in 2012, so what does that make him? That makes him 12, right? So he's 12. I keep saying 13, but I think he's 12. So Bueller is in that kind of old man state right now. And it is a nice stage to own a dog because it's literally. It's like, hey, you have to throw the ball two times a day. That's it. Because he's exhausted after that. And then all he does is lay there and snore and look cute and then cuddle with me.

[Ben Mandelker]

That's.

[Ronnie Karam]

And I mean, that's a really cute era for a dog, you know?

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. No, that's. That. That.

[Ronnie Karam]

Do not leave me.

[Ben Mandelker]

Maybe I. Maybe I. Maybe senior dogs would be more my speed, bro.

[Ronnie Karam]

I think we're talking ourselves into senior dogs right now. I'm like, these guys are so stupid. Getting senior dogs. What senior dog? Now I'm want old ass dogs only for the rest of my life. This is a worth good trend.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. Yeah, I think it sounds great. Now. What if they mean senior dogs? Like, these are dogs that are going off to college and it's their senior year and all they want to do is party and go to the prom. These. These are prom.

[Ronnie Karam]

I do not want. Yeah, I don't want this humping every pillow. You can't get a new pillow from HomeGoods cuz they're humping it. It's like, that is not your girlfriend.

[Ben Mandelker]

I know. You know, I would get the dog. Dog that be like wear a little beret. That's like just got into nyu. Yeah, I'm going to Tish. I'm like, you're not your dog.

[Ronnie Karam]

You're doing keg stand. You're doing like milk bone stands on your head.

[Ben Mandelker]

So I would get like the president of the drama club dog.

[Ronnie Karam]

So they're going to have 12 dogs at this party. And Tyler's like, but what about humans? Is anyone's gonna come? Or. I mean like, what's that about? And he's like, well, you know, after talking to Austin, we just felt like it was better to like pump the brakes on having J.T. there, you know? And so we. So Tyler's like, well, so he's in the doghouse, Is that what you're saying? And the lady's like, that was an attempt. You attempted something. And for that, here, here's a milk bone. This milk bone with bow on it. Okay. Put it in your hair. Just, you know, just keep calling yourself gay and try. Maybe. You know what? Fake it till you make it. That's what I say. Guys.

[Ben Mandelker]

You know what? JT has really bungled his season so far. That's undeniable. But Rodrigo deciding to ban JT from the stupid party because of a conversation he had with Austin. I just feel like you should never use Austin as your primary evidence or reasoning as why to not invite someone. Now maybe I'm assuming Austin told him that JT called Ms. Patricia A. And that's. No one wants to get Patricia's bad side, right? But I still am like. I'm like, all of a sudden. Look at this. Austin all of a sudden is now, like, just, oh, yeah, good old Austin. Like, people just forget. He don't forget everyone. He's a douchebag. And you shouldn't be going to him to find out who should be coming to your party.

[Ronnie Karam]

Right. But Austin did tell him that he called Patricia a bitch. And, you know, any gay in town is going to be like, oh, yeah, you don't. With that. Oh, yeah, sorry, you will not be coming. Yeah, he told him.

[Ben Mandelker]

So he's like, actually, here's the scene right here. Yeah. We see a flashback, literally.

[Ronnie Karam]

So he's. He is banned. So then we go to Patricia and Whitney's house, and a letter comes through the mail slot, and Patricia goes. That's the mail slot.

[Ben Mandelker]

That's also where Randy gets his lunches.

[Ronnie Karam]

That's where I put Randy's hand through. And then I walk to the other end of it and just start hitting it with butter knives until it does what I want.

[Ben Mandelker]

When it's time for him to have his dinner, I said, put your mouth up against the m. Slide, and we just pour frozen peas down it.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, I can see what it is, Mother. I just. It's. It's a.

[Ben Mandelker]

It's a.

[Ronnie Karam]

It's a.

[Ben Mandelker]

A.

[Ronnie Karam]

A navy blue envelope with a black pen. So you got to look at it like hieroglyphics, but it says, I think two. Ms. Patricia from JT. Well, how does he expect anyone to see this? Randy, get in here. Sorry, ma'am. I'm still. I'm still tied to the. To the radiator. God damn it, Randy, untie yourself. I need more help.

[Ben Mandelker]

All right, I'm gonna read this. Let me put on my. Put on my readers. Okay. All right, so. Dear Ms. Patricia, please accept this apology for the lack of respect at the Carolina Cup. Carolina. Carolina Cup. My intent was meant as a sign of inclusion and solidarity. Inclusion. Because, you know, the word inclusion is like a curse word in the South. Okay?

[Ronnie Karam]

That's the last thing they want to hear in the South. I'm not doing it. States rights. Am I right? Hey, Whitney, could you press that little button next to you on the coffee table? Sure, Mom. That was so funny. I had some. Some ice water hanging in the bucket above where Randy is tied up. So funny. All right, so let's read the rest of this. Well, inclusion. Okay, well, I didn't realize he was giving everybody A cane, but I mean, I can still do hand stands and cartwheels and push buttons. Watch that one iron.

[Ben Mandelker]

I'm pretty sure last season Patricia's storyline was that she was stuck in bed with a back injury, but either way, it was rude. It was definitely a rude and terrible joke on JT's part. So Patricia's like, now, you know, admitted. She finishes the. She finishes reading the letter which says, admittedly, I most certainly missed the mark, and I apologize for that. With warm regards, jt. And then she just gives a look to Whitney like, what a pussy. She's an icon.

[Ronnie Karam]

She really does. And they don't get it. She goes, oh my God, look at the hand. Right?

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, it's exactly like you said. If she thinks you're an idiot, it doesn't matter what you write.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. And when he's like, looks, looks like it was written by 10 year old JT, you know, he's just like an annoying gnat. I mean, I don't know anything that he could say or write that would interest me at this point, but letter writing is a lost art form, so in that respect it is a nice gesture. Now can he write? No, but he tried. I like that she at least gave him that, that point.

[Ben Mandelker]

You know, apparently another lost art form is giving your mother grandchildren. Whitney. Mother. It's not about me right now.

[Ronnie Karam]

So it's like, mother. Is it? Is it? Is it? You can confirm that he called you a. Well, I'm assuming it's true, but I don't know. It wouldn't be the first time, that's for sure. I mean, city council just convened last week. Good Lord. Half of the meeting was spent calling me a. So, you know, getting lines. What I say, you know, lines are a lost art form.

[Ben Mandelker]

So Lord knows that that handwriting needed a few lines to write on. So Whitney is like, I don't think GT is the kind of person who would call a woman a. Well, and throughout the years, Craig has had a tenuous relationship with reality and the truth.

[Ronnie Karam]

So when we see that scene of Craig in 2017 talking to his therapist, who basically looks like shocked Pikachu the entire time, he's like, yeah, I can convince a lot of people of anything I want to convince them of because I'm a great liar. And she's just like.

[Ben Mandelker]

When he's like, it comes back. And Whitney's like, she really has a lot of expressions.

[Ronnie Karam]

I remember recapping that episode. We were dying laughing through that whole thing just based on her looks alone. So funny.

[Ben Mandelker]

She was Amazing. So Whitney is like, oh, this letter is clearly heartfelt, so I'll give him the benefit of the doubt. I mean, I don't know. I've got bigger things to think about, like why I put so much bastion on my face for this interview, but whatever.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. So Patricia's like, oh, you know, I hate you. I hate. You know, I know that you hate when I speak French, but listen, the aim now is just an intent cordial. So just to be cordial is what I'm trying to say. And he's like, up homewards and upwards, you know? Oh, right, right, Mother. Say it. All right, Whitney. Jesus Christ. You over educated little. Go impregnate somebody already. I'm exhausted.

[Ben Mandelker]

So now we go over to Shep's house, and Sienna's there, and they are coming home. They've got some coffee and croissants, which sounds great. And Shep is like, would you like to talk about your sleep or lack thereof? Let me guess. You stayed up late watching the riveting documentary the Vietnam War by Ken Burns. She's like, no, it's because Craig was farting in my face all night. He's so invulnerable. Know your dog, Craig? Oh. Oh, yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

So they make small talk. He's like, I'm just so glad you're here. She's like, me, too. So he's like, yeah, I just. I've never dated anyone quite like Sienna. She walks into a room and you're like, whoa, who's this? Thankfully, she's always wearing a sash, so, you know.

[Ben Mandelker]

And it's not just because she's gorgeous, but she just has an energy and a spirit and a joy, which I'm super drawn to. And she lives in the Bahamas, and every time we have a weekend together, I'm just like, wow. Oh, God. I just don't feel like this way very often. I'm a little boy who's happy.

[Ronnie Karam]

So he's like, I want to come down there, you know, for a little while. She goes, okay, that would be fun. And he's like, maybe a month. And she's like, well, I have this fantasy, basically, you know, in my mind, we're not living in the Bahamas with her for the rest of my life. And I just surf and I fish. We'll have kids or something. They'll run around the island, you know, I just. Oh, God. Chef, of course.

[Ben Mandelker]

That's your turn. Craig did it first. Craig did it first. Sorry. Craig did the, like, Eat, Pray, Love in Bahamas thing and came back and Started a business. So find a new fantasy, Shep.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, I just. I don't know. I kind of feel bad for Shep. But then. I don't know. Then I'm like, you're just wasting your time. Stop falling into the trap, you know? I mean, I need to stop falling into the trap. It's just so sad.

[Ben Mandelker]

Midlife crisis. That's what it's called. So Shep is like, well, enough about us. Let's start with Rod and Tyler's dog party. Okay, so you're gonna meet everyone, including my ex, Taylor, and it's fine, I think. I don't know if she'll have a boyfriend with her, but if she does, even better. Oh. And she's like, whatever. I don't really care that much. Oh, it's so profound. And Sienna's like, c'est la vie, mother. Stop speaking French. When did you get out of my room?

[Ronnie Karam]

Wow. C'est la vie. I can't believe you know that. How's your friends? And she's. She's like.

[Ben Mandelker]

Oh, wow.

[Ronnie Karam]

Goosebumps. Am I right? Antante?

[Ben Mandelker]

Wrong. So now we, Molly and Sally, go for a walk around that one square pond that they sometimes walk around on this show because they've got nothing else to do. So Molly and Sally are walking, and, you know, I'm talking. They do this, like. I feel like Olivia and Taylor walked around it last season. Everyone goes there. It's the pond. It's the pond that everyone likes walking around.

[Ronnie Karam]

So town square pond or whatever.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. So Molly's talking about how she met Sally working at Republic. So I'm sure if we go back in our Southern hospitality recaps, we probably saw Molly and we're like, look at that girl. She looks so bored. So she's saying that they were both via front door vip, and oddly enough, they didn't show any footage of Sally being front door because that was a whole thing on last season on Southern hospitality. They didn't cross purpose, but whatever. I wonder if they did.

[Ronnie Karam]

I'll bet they did, actually, because they showed a couple. Couple of. Of door girls that we didn't see. I wonder if they were, like, trying to try put. Decide which show to put them on, because there's a lot of cross poly here.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, so we also like.

[Ronnie Karam]

Cross poly guys.

[Ben Mandelker]

That's what we.

[Ronnie Karam]

That's how we say in the end.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. Or it's how you describe a girl named Polly who gets mad.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Polly who likes to cross dreams with other girls named Polly.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. But now we're talking About Molly and Polly. And Molly is telling. Talking about Sally. And Molly has this to say about Sally, which is that Saleh, her day job, she teaches searches how to use surgical robots, which is pretty cool.

[Ronnie Karam]

That is pretty cool.

[Ben Mandelker]

Actually, I was not expecting that.

[Ronnie Karam]

I was absolutely not expecting that. And so her and Gaston are both kind of in the medical industry. Who knew? I thought you were just supposed to be bimbo trash to be on this show. And I mean, both of them himbo bimbo trash, you know? But nope, they're like, actually, they got it going now. How long before she gives that up to try and sell spritzers to Leva? Who knows? We'll see. Oh, gosh, I forgot they're talking. It's so funny that Taylor's still on the show because she really is just like a wet blanket. She's like, yeah, so it's like, crazy. She sells medical devices. It's so neat. So, like, what's it like be? Oh, no, this isn't her. Who's she with? She's with Molly.

[Ben Mandelker]

Molly.

[Ronnie Karam]

Sally is kind of like this too. They've got a lot of. They've got a lot of blondes who are. They've got a lot of monotone blondes happening right now on the show. Yeah. So basically, they're talking about the boys. And Molly's like, you know, Whitney can be an insensitive asshole, but whatever. I could just kind of talk my way around it in my head. Like, maybe he's just flirting when he's calling me fat. Fun. Love that for me. Great. Love that. Yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

And then. And Sally's like, did you smack him? I would have smacked him when he said that. She's like, no, because I would have eaten three right in front of him. Molly's like, well, honestly, I feel like I stopped eating after he said that. And I was like, nah, I don't want to eat that cupcake. And so I was like, well, don't take. Just don't take it to heart. That was stupid. And Molly, that. Molly's excusing it. She's like, you know when you could be an insensitive, but I kind of, like, talk my way around it in.

[Ronnie Karam]

My head maybe, like, maybe he's just flirting, you know, Like, I love that for me. So then Molly's like, yeah, okay. Well, Shep, you know, Shep was talking about you a little bit. She's like, well, what'd he say? So then we see Shep and Sally were telling the same story about each other. Dun, dun, dun. So shep's telling it like, whoa, Mustang Sally. She used me. And I liked it.

[Ben Mandelker]

Rawr. And Sally's like, yeah, it was like 2 in the morning, and he, like, wouldn't leave my place.

[Ronnie Karam]

And so then Flash, Shep's version is like, yeah, but I was like, I want to stay here. And she's like, no, you're not staying here. Can you believe it?

[Ben Mandelker]

She's like. I was like, shep, I'm getting you an Uber. Please get your man stank out of my bed.

[Ronnie Karam]

So I get in the Uber, and the Uber's like, what's up, bro? And I'm like, something just happened.

[Ben Mandelker]

Shep. Like, I'm sorry. You're just, like, not the kind of guy that I see myself with. I'm not interested in human puddles. So, yeah, you have to go.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. Taylor said that he maybe isn't the kind of guy who cares the most about pleasing a woman.

[Ben Mandelker]

And sell is like. I'm not saying, like, I regret it or anything, but I definitely was not bragging about it. Okay. I think with Gaston. Okay, I know what. I know what? I know what dreams are really like.

[Ronnie Karam]

So now they start talking about the dog party. Is Gaston going to be there with Taylor? And Sally's like, oh, my God. Like, obviously I don't have anything good to say about him, but, like, that's my story. You know, that doesn't have to be Taylor's story, because me and Gaston dated for three months, and he was like, my person. You know how you are when you're dating somebody for three months. Like, you're my person. We were basically married, but, you know, he was cheating the whole time, but it doesn't mean he's cheating on Taylor.

[Ben Mandelker]

And Molly's like, you and Taylor, you know, you guys obviously have a similar taste in men, I guess. And Sally's like, yeah, I just think we could bond over a lot of stuff. I don't know, like, do I want to see her boyfriend? No, not really. So basically, they're setting up that there could be a tense moment at this dog party. And speaking of which, Taylor is getting ready. We see her getting ready, and she's putting on a hat, so she facetimes Gaston to find out what he's up to. And he's not terribly interested. In fact, he doesn't even go to this party in this episode because he doesn't want to be around that whole group.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. Which is weird because I thought he was thirsty to be on tv. So I'm not really sure what's going on. I'm not reading the situation properly. Is he waiting for his moment? Like, what's he doing? What are you doing? Maybe he's just a phrase, man.

[Ben Mandelker]

He just. He probably doesn't want to be confronted about his own, you know, cheating. Etc. So Taylor's like. She's trying to, like, show off, like, her outfit and everything. And, you know, they're like, okay, cool. And she says to us, Gaston's like a little cutthroat of a human being. Which is, like, a weird thing to say. And, by the way, also not an attractive quality, I think, that you want to have in this guy you're trying to sell us on. She. She's like, he doesn't understand my forgiving spirit. He's like, why would you want to be hanging out with Shep? These are his boundaries. But, like, I want to be there because these are some of my good friends. What? These are his boundaries?

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

He's cutthroat.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

Giving spirit.

[Ronnie Karam]

I don't know.

[Ben Mandelker]

Forgiving spirit. I don't believe that.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. Taylor doesn't really know how to pick him. So let's see how this goes. So now it's the doggy parting time. And so we hear the story about the gays adopting the dog from an elderly woman who couldn't take care of the dogs anymore. And so he's like, yeah, I love dogs more than humans, so. Well, yeah, look at the humans you hang out with. I don't blame you.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. I think that humans are more like dogs and the dogs are more like humans on this show. So Taylor arrives and people just sort of showing up and saying hi and everything. And Taylor's asking about, like, who's coming? And Rodrigo says, molly's coming and she has to bring Sally. Etc. And Taylor just says, it was. It was awkward. And she says, all I know is that this girl hooked up with Shep, and then after that, she hooked up with Gaston in hopes that, like, he would keep her around. And he didn't. I was like, okay, like, don't act like you won a prize by getting Gaston. Okay.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. So now more people arise and arise, arrive. They're arising. More people start coming out of the ground. So then Madison's like, well, I do think it's bad time to. Gaston. Is that his name? Gaston? I don't know. I don't know if he even exists. Well, he's not here. I mean, who is he? Is he real? And then Molly and Sally come, and it's an arrival scene. You know how it Goes. So Sally's like. So Taylor. It just keeps cutting to Taylor to make, like, drama. Like, oh, Sally just came in. Let's get Taylor's reaction. But Taylor's just, like, sitting there kind of buck tooth, like. And then they'll show Sally hugging somebody, and then it'll cut back to Taylor, and Taylor's just sitting there with a deadpan. It's so funny. They're trying to make Taylor into this huge soap opera star, and there's literally nothing there. It's like the shades are down.

[Ben Mandelker]

You know, she's just so awkward. Even at the end of her last scene with Gaston, like, they. Like, she gets off the phone with Gaston, and then she still keeps looking at her phone and goes, yeah, so, okay, like, you're not on the phone with anyone. Taylor, who are you talking to right now? There's just something so awkward and sad about her. So Sally then talks like there's this. Then there's like, a sort of a awkwardness with Taylor and Sally at the party. And Sally's like. She tells us, okay, I. Shep. Okay, cool. That was your ex. You, Gaston. Cool. That was my ex. We're even. We're even.

[Ronnie Karam]

So then Taylor is dressed like Brett Michaels, and she's like, yeah, Rock of Love, baby.

[Ben Mandelker]

And would make sense that she watched that show. And then Leva.

[Ronnie Karam]

How dare you? How dare you. You swallow your goddamn words.

[Ben Mandelker]

Rock of Love was not great.

[Ronnie Karam]

That was an amazing piece of television. That was Americana. What are you even an American? Get out. Get out of my country. You don't belong anymore. I'm done with you. I'm done.

[Ben Mandelker]

It was definitely not. What was the one with what's his face? I can't remember people's names.

[Ronnie Karam]

Rock of Love was amazing. I hope they do it again. Diabetes. I love that show. Diabetes. I got diabetes. So then, you know, lots of small talk and stuff like that. Leva comes, and of course, she's super fun. She's like, like, your cowboy hat. And Rodrigo's like, yeah, we stayed up all night. Be dazzling it. She goes, really? He goes, no, we bought it like this. She's like, oh, just, you know, barrel of fun. So then we see little Craig. I mean, everything's like, super cute, guys. So now Leva's like, oh, my God, it's Shep coming with little Craig. And Tyler's like, yeah. And then are they bringing the girlfriend? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on with JT and so jt, Rodrigo's like, I'm not inviting him. You know, like, there was a certain level of bombast that wasn't necessary.

[Ben Mandelker]

That's fair. That's fair. I mean, this is a guy who showed up to this Carolina cup with canes for everyone, and it's like he's just like, he is over the top. JT is constantly trying to have a TV moment, which is his biggest failing. And it drives me nuts because I feel like there was a lot of potential for him.

[Ronnie Karam]

And so you know what drive me nuts? Phrases like, there was a certain level of bombast that wasn't necessary there. So I need more of that in my life. I'm going to start talking like the people in these shows. Like, well, could we. Could we lighten up with the bombast?

[Ben Mandelker]

When a phrase like that is uttered by like a sweater gay, it's really difficult, devastating. You know, like, yeah, there's just a certain level of bombast. Yeah. So love is like, well, I just hate anyone feeling excluded. You know, in our friend group, if we were going to be like, we're not going to be friends with someone because they did something wrong, then none of us would be friends.

[Ronnie Karam]

So, okay, lady that won't hide Mia and what's her buns back on Southern hospitality over a fairly minor infraction. Okay.

[Ben Mandelker]

And there we go. That's right. Because of Leah. CEO. So then Rodrigo, he's basically like, yeah, but he called her a. He called Ms. Patricia A. And love is like, I can't even imagine that. Like, I've never even heard him say that word. Like, he would always talk when he. When he would talk about Madison, he always talked about Brand Madison, and they're a lovely family. He was always respectful. So this is just like really, really wild.

[Ronnie Karam]

So she's like, I don't know, like, let's just play the devil's advocate. And Taylor's like, yeah, that's just not jt. I mean, his whole storyline last year was standing up for. For the women. So the fact that he's just like, coming around and being like, that woman's a and this one wants to me is weird. But to be on, you know, to be fair, JT's annoying. But he didn't say that he thinks Madison is trying to him. And that's what everybody else is saying. They're saying that he's assuming that Madison wants to him. That's not what he was saying. He's saying the boyfriend thinks that he was doing something or he was acting fishy or inappropriate with Madison. And that's what he's being called about. It's not that Madison would want to fuck him. It's that the boyfriend is suspicious. That's weird.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yes.

[Ronnie Karam]

Which is true. Which we find out is completely true.

[Ben Mandelker]

So, yeah, kind of. So Madison's like, I honestly just want to shut this down. I mean, anytime I hear someone that's talking bad about me and my family, the first thing I'm going to do is address it head on. Like, I'm going to. I'm going to go straight to the person, and we're cutting off the head of that snake, that beta snow snake. Okay? If you're an alpha snake, that's one thing, but you're a beta snake. You're just a little garden snake. Stupid.

[Ronnie Karam]

Die. Better snake. Die, beta. So I. I'm the original beta blocker. So then Leva is talking to Taylor, and they're talking about the girlfriend, Shep's girlfriend, and she hasn't met her. And Lev is like, is that his girlfriend? And Taylor's like, I think that's one on his roster. And it's like. And then it cuts to her soap opera face, which is like this.

[Ben Mandelker]

It's like she just sharded.

[Ronnie Karam]

And so it's just that plain. Like one tooth sticking out, staring off into the. Staring off into the distance.

[Ben Mandelker]

It was sweet, though. Little Craig does come bounding over to Taylor to say hi. He's like, my mommy. And then now Madison's talking to his Sienna, and she's like, so did you just travel here? Is that what he said? Are you a beta? Just tell me right now, are you a beta? Are you an alpha? I need to know if I can hang out with you. Sienna's like, yeah, I just got in last night at 12. Sounds like Alpha behavior. Okay, you're approved. So, yeah, Madison's like, yeah, this is not what I was expecting. She's like, way too pretty for ship. I mean, here's Taylor. Taylor dressed like Brett Michaels. And then you have a supermodel walk in, and you're like, look at that over there. So Jeff is like. Shep is like, hey, Sally, I'm happy to see you. Thank you. And I'm happy to see that you're friendly with Taylor, by the way. She's like, oh, yeah. I mean, yeah, but, like, I hate her boyfriend, so. Oh, yeah. Well, you're not alone. You're like, if you were alone, you could be like, home alone. Go. Sorry. That's like my spirit animal, because I'm a little boy in a house alone and robbers Are trying to get me. Oh, I'm spiraling. What am I saying? I have to stop. How do I get off this carousel ride? Sally, help me. Sally.

[Ronnie Karam]

Bump. Ow. I tripped over a rope, and it dropped a paint can on my head. Gorsh. So he's like, you know, I haven't heard good things about Gaston. If he was a stock, all the analysts are saying, sell. I haven't met one analyst who said buy. I'll leave it at that. I wouldn't buy that stock with my daddy's money.

[Ben Mandelker]

Let me tell you something. The men of southern charm, I think we could just say universally bear market. It's a bear market. It's not just Gaston. Okay.

[Ronnie Karam]

Oh, so then Tyler is asking Taylor. She's met Sienna yet. So she's like, no, that I should. But I don't want to, like, go up to her, you know, like, say what? Like, hi, nice to meet you. So. So, I mean, I talked to. But, like, I would feel more comfortable if he was like, I want to introduce you. But of course he's being awkward because, like, I don't want to be awkward. Just introduce me. Like, I don't care. Like, what am I awkward? I'm not. I'm totally fine. Look at me. I'm totally fine. I'm great. Everything's great here.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, I don't want to just, like, go up to her and just be like, hi, nice to meet you. And she turns goes, hi, Hi, nice to meet you.

[Ronnie Karam]

Nice to meet you.

[Ben Mandelker]

She literally goes, I think that because Rodrigo was bringing her over, but it was just so funny. She's like, no, I don't want to just, like, be high. And then she. That's exactly what she does within a heartbeat.

[Ronnie Karam]

And Sienna's funny because she goes, oh, hi. I've heard so much about you. She goes, oh, thank you. Well, hopefully good things. And she goes, mostly, Ha ha ha.

[Ben Mandelker]

Taylor's like, oh, that was like, oh, damn, Sienna. And she does with this big smile on her face. Until I go, yeah, mostly, Hopefully. I mean, that's when Taylor's supposed to say, well, that's great. You know, I haven't heard anything about you, actually.

[Ronnie Karam]

That's. Yeah, well, I think.

[Ben Mandelker]

Response.

[Ronnie Karam]

I know it seemed like she was being bitchy to Taylor, but I took it as her bonding with Taylor being bitchy about Shep almost, in a way, if that makes any sense. Like, she was like, yeah, like, of. Of course he's bitching. What an idiot. You know what I mean? But I don't know. So I'M hoping it was that way. I guess I'm hoping that she's more of a girl's girl. But then Madison's like, okay. So they're like, I guess we'll see how this turns out. So then Sienna motions to Shep and Taylor, and she's like, oh, wow, look at you guys. You have the same scarf on. Because they're both wearing a red bandana. And Seth's like, oh, well, this wasn't coordinated. Barely know her.

[Ben Mandelker]

Who is she? I don't know. So then Austin's like, that's super awkward, but I guess I'll watch. So then Sienna's like, so you guys are mad. Oh, and your dogs are matching, too. Wow. Okay, that's cool. It's kind of cute, kind of funny, raising some red flags for me, but that's okay.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, and that was pretty creepy. So then Molly's like, are you okay? She's asking Taylor. She goes, yeah, I mean, I just met Shep's girlfriend, question mark. And Molly's like, well, I asked Whitney how long they'd been seeing each other, and he said, six months. And Molly's like, matter no matter how over someone you are, like, seeing a guy walk in like that, that's rough. I mean, that can be triggering. You know, we bringing up old wounds. I mean, I wouldn't like it. That girl's hot. That girl's hot. Oh, wazoo. That girl's hot.

[Ben Mandelker]

So now we go to JT's apartment where he's there alone, and he opens up a package and he's like, so this is fun device or something cool. A book? No, it's Dustbuster. It's not fun. Excuse me, sir. A Dustbuster is a tremendous amount of fun. And I don't know where you are getting your notions of what is right and wrong, but you are really failing this season.

[Ronnie Karam]

If this was Southern hospitality, TJ would have just splooged all over the screen.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, I love every time I got a Dustbuster. My first ever Dustbuster. I got it about a year and a half ago. I keep it right in my kitchen, and anytime there's like flour on the counter or anything, I just go. And it is just so fun every single time. It's fun every single time.

[Ronnie Karam]

Never gets old. So I just love that he narrates his own life for the tv. He's just so awkward at this, you know? So then we go to him calling Madison and, oh, because by the way.

[Ben Mandelker]

I guess the dog party's over. I Thought this was a cutaway, but it turns out the dog party's over because nothing really happened.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, nothing really happened. But a lot of intrigue of people meeting people and people. And this is very ensemble today, the way they're doing the show today. They literally show everybody on the show and then bring them all together. And everyone's awkward because everyone's new to each other. So it's actually kind of a reset this season, which is odd. It's like a bunch of the same people, but they're all in new situations. And, I don't know. They did a pretty good job setting up a new season.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. New class, too. They're doing a good job of layering in new people in a way that Vanderpump Rules had kind of failed, which is why Vanderpump Rules isn't. What. What happened to Vanderpump Rules is that, like, they just were never able to get really any good new talent beyond Lala and James and then Brittany. Those are the only three major new additions I think, that I can think of over the course of the show. So, like. But this show has been really good about layering in new people. Like, every season, there's, like, sort of a new batch of people that just sort of. You're always like, why are they on this show? But they just sort of forced them.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, this time they're doing a good job because they're not. Just. Usually they try and mix them with a more powerful person who's. Or a person who's been there longer. Right. So it's like, Taylor can only be shot with Shep in some way, or Austin, or they have to be shot with somebody big. And this time they're just like, okay, let's just have a scene of the newbies at the dog store. And then let's have a scene with these newbies taking a walk around the lake. Like, they don't care. They're just like, we're just gonna let. We don't care if the audience doesn't know them. We'll just let them figure it out. I mean, it's interesting. It's an interesting way to do it. It's pretty good. I think it's working so far.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. And let's have Vanita steam her drapes.

[Ronnie Karam]

Poor Vanita. Yeah. They're like, let's just put random people walking around. Not Vanita, though. You know, let's just keep Vanita steaming a shirt. Did we? We got the steaming. That was pretty good. All right, that's good enough, guys. So Madison and JC Go to meet up at a coffee shop, and it's.

[Ben Mandelker]

I was mad. I just want to say I was mad. Sorry to interrupt. When she called JT and said, like, hey, do you want to. You want to make me have some coffee? I was like. And then you're supposed to say the next. The. You were supposed to say, why you're going to have coffee. There's a certain thing you're supposed to say on the show, and not once did you say, I was just in the neighborhood.

[Ronnie Karam]

Neighborhood. No kidding. But we do get the Amazon package, so that's good, because JT Is opening the Amazon package, so. So they go meet at this coffee shop, and he's like, I'm just gonna have some water. You know what? Tea would be welcomed. Okay? You just order the fucking tea, bro. So he goes out and this is awkward as hell, this scene. This is so awkward. So we see flashbacks to what he's talking about, the Craig stuff and all that. So Madison's like, well, you know, I feel blindsided that I thought we were friends. It has never been anything more than that. And I'm sorry, J.T. but are you blind? Have you seen my husband? Do you really think that for one second I would trade corn for an avocado? I mean, look at yourself. You can't even be left out on a counter for a day without turning squishy. Nobody wants you. Avocado. Okay. I was born for corn, and my husband is corn. You are hideous. You are disgusting. You have the face of a. Of a dog and a beaver mixed. You look like a dog and a beaver made a baby, and it's disgusting. Go build a dam and chase a stick. Beaver, dog. Okay, leave me alone.

[Ben Mandelker]

And he's like. He's like, but when you FaceTime me, I was confused. And she goes, oh, well, the jt. The one time that we called you is because he was like, well, wait, who was in your room late at night? And I said, it was just a bunch of people that came back to my room. It was never just me and you. And so then he was asking if you were alone with J.T.

[Ronnie Karam]

Dun, dun, dun. J.T. was correct. What J.C. was right. J.T. said was right. He did call, and he did insinuate that something might have been going on with them. So that was weird. Now, the fact that he came on and went so hard with it with Craig and Austin was not the best way to go about it and really stupid. And I hate even sticking up for JT but he wasn't really wrong.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. Well, then she clarifies to us, and she says that, like, every night she calls Brett, and then one night, she didn't call. And so she thinks that maybe Brett was just trying to confirm that it wasn't just me and Austin hanging out, drinking red wine and eating McDonald's in the bed. So then Brett, that, by the way, does have a potential streak.

[Ronnie Karam]

So he is jealous. But also what's really probably devastating. And you see that JT has just, like, really been dissed. Like, JT Is really being not only read for filth, but just talk down to. And just such a bad. Like, it's demeaning, you know? And I'm laughing because it's JT but it's also sad. And it's so sad because it's not only like, I don't want. This whole thing wasn't about me wanting to. Brett being jealous of you. Who would be jealous of you? This whole thing was about Brett being jealous of Austin. And that's like, ouch. That's really an ouch. You know? And you just see his face fall. He's like, yeah, I have no idea. Like, he's like, I'm gonna go out of here limping on both legs.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. He's like, I just felt uncomfortable with all those questions. And then everything changed with you. Like, what did I do wrong? I mean, you mean girled me, and I'm like, why is my friend mean girling me? Just. You know what? I think Austin might have been right about you this whole entire time because you are not a gentleman. You call Patricia A. And you're the. And he's like, what? What are you talking about? I don't believe I've ever called. Called that woman that words. Well, that's what I've heard. And I believe everything I hear. So JT basically. Basically is. Tells us he doesn't. He would never call Patricia A because he doesn't call women, because one time when he was little, he's like, you know how little boys like to challenge their moms? Well, I remember one day, I said, can we go to 7 11? I want a Slurpee. And she said, no. And I said, mom, you're a. I mean, I said it right in front of Poppy Seed. I couldn't even believe it. And that was the last time I ever used that word, if you know what I'm saying.

[Ronnie Karam]

Let me tell you what happened when I called mom the B word. Can I get some help from the orchestra? Adoring. Thank you. I Think enough is said there. So he basically says, listen, I'm sorry I said what I said to the boys about how I received the FaceTime call and I didn't know how to handle it. And I wish I'd come to you and I'd like to leave it there. This does not need to go further. And she goes, huh. Wow. You are unbelievable. I thought that was a pretty good apology. I mean, what the hell?

[Ben Mandelker]

I thought.

[Ronnie Karam]

I don't even know why I'm wasting my time because she has decided now he sucks. She needs somebody to hate on this show. Madison's really nothing without somebody to hate on. And she's got him. And she's like, I'm not letting this go. Basically, thanks for nothing. I'm going to torture you now for the rest of the season. Have fun, sucker. Yeah, but also, we have to remember this is Craig's fault for how he set everything up, you know, and she's in this moment, she's just like, I'm not believing you. You thirsty? Idiot. You called her a. You basically insinuated I was a. And you're not going to talk your way out of it. So I don't know that I even blame her because Craig set it up in such a way that he's really not going to get out of this hole. Right?

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. And it's also, like, to be quite frank, like, I think it's unnatural for Madison to. To side perpetually with JT over Austin. Like, she is someone who wants to be around an Alpha, and I think she does view JT as a Beta. So as much as she can't stand Austin, as much as they've, quote, unquote, made peace, I think she still hates Austin, but she will still ultimately gravitate towards Alpha energy before she, you know, puts all her eggs in a Beta basket.

[Ronnie Karam]

The Beta basket, y'all say the best. Okay, well, thanks so much for being here, everybody. We will be back with Southern Charm in a couple of weeks when it comes back, and we sure love you guys. Have an amazing holiday and amazing new Year. We love you guys. Thank you for everything you do for us on this show. You know, you give us the best life. So thank you for being here with us. We really appreciate you guys and we love you.

[Ben Mandelker]

Thank you so much. And we will still. We still have plenty of shows next week, so stay tuned.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yes, there will be a break for us, a few days for us, but crappings will be on every day of the week, baby. So come on back. We'll talk to you next time. Bye.

[Ben Mandelker]

Bye. So many kisses. Watch what Crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King it's always automatic with Ashley Auto Ashley Savoni.

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[Ronnie Karam]

No shrinking violet Coutar. We love you guys. If you like, watch what crappens. You can listen ad free right now by joining Wondery in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short [e-mail] survey they say Hollywood is where dreams are made A seductive city where many flock to get rich, be adored and capture America's heart. But when the spotlight turns off, fame, fortune and lives can disappear in an instant. When TV producer Roy Raiden was found dead in a Canyon near LA in 1983, there were many questions surrounding his death. The last person seen with him was Lainey Jacobs, a seductive cocaine dealer who desperately wanted to be part of the Hollywood Hollywood elite. Together, they were trying to break into the movie industry. But things took a dark turn when a million dollars worth of cocaine and cash went missing. From Wondery comes a new season of the hit show Hollywood and Crime, the Cotton Club Murder. Follow Hollywood and Crime the Cotton Club Murder on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of the Cotton Club Murder early and ad free right now by joining Wondery.