#2666 Hot Frosty with Reality Gays Part 1:

Summary

Watch What Crappens - Episode #2666: "Hot Frosty with Reality Gays Part 1"

Release Date: December 25, 2024
Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam
Podcast Platform: Wondery

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Introduction to "Hot Frosty"

In this episode of Watch What Crappens, hosts Ben Mandelker and Ronnie Karam, along with guest contributors Poodle and Matt from Reality Gays, delve into Netflix's latest creation, "Hot Frosty." A modern retelling of the classic "Frosty the Snowman" tale, this film attempts to infuse adult humor and controversial themes into the beloved children's story.

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Plot Overview and Initial Impressions

Ben Mandelker begins by questioning the core premise of the movie: "Have you ever found the house of your dreams only to learn it has dark secrets?" This sets the stage for their exploration of the film's narrative, where a snowman named Jack Frost comes to life under dubious circumstances.

Ronnie Karam criticizes the film's attempt to modernize the story: "There's no way the movie pit. The pitch to the studios..." Highlighting issues with character development and plot consistency, Ronnie points out that the movie fails to align with the original's whimsical nature.

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Critical Analysis of Movie Elements

Character Development:
The hosts express frustration with the protagonist Kathy's portrayal. Ben remarks, "I found it interesting that they chose to make a film about a lady who's terribly unhappy and then stays terribly unhappy," emphasizing the lack of character growth and emotional resolution.

Plot Consistency:
Matt raises concerns about the movie's plot holes: "Have you ever heard of Outlander, sir? It would have been some, like, stuffy English person..." This critique extends to the movie’s subplot involving a stolen snow sculpture, which the hosts feel is inadequately addressed and disconnected from the main narrative.

Humor and Tone:
Poodle and Matt discuss the film's attempt at humor, particularly the camp elements introduced by actors like Craig Robinson and Joe Latru. Matt notes, "They were like having so much fun that I'm like, hey, stop," indicating that the film's humor feels forced and disrupts the storytelling.

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Sexual and LGBTQ+ Themes

A significant portion of the discussion centers around the movie's LGBTQ+ representation. Ben expresses discomfort with the portrayal: “...add Lacey Charbet. Charvet. Charbot.” The hosts critique the shallow and stereotypical depiction of gay characters, suggesting that the film misses opportunities for meaningful representation.

Ronnie humorously adds, "I love chocolate. If you're in a hurry and forgot something..." juxtaposing innocent topics with the film's more adult themes, highlighting the incongruity in the movie’s tone.

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Notable Quotes

• Ronnie (00:00): “The holidays are upon us and Whole Foods Market is your holiday headquarters...”
• Ben (01:12): “Hims and Hers connects you with a medical provider who will work with you to determine your best treatment option.”
• Poodle (03:03): “Welcome, everyone.”
• Ben (03:16): “I’ve only had a relationship with Ben longer than this.”
• Matt (07:00): “No, I was charmed by this movie. I cannot believe I cried a little bit.”
• Ronnie (10:17): “Fucking body shaming bitches. This is a very dirty podcast.”
• Ben (13:39): “He died, everybody. Sorry, everybody. Spoiler alert. He died.”

These quotes exemplify the hosts' humorous and often irreverent take on both advertisements and the movie's content.

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Themes and Deeper Insights

Metaphorical Parallels:
The hosts draw parallels between "Hot Frosty" and religious narratives, particularly the story of Jesus Christ. Matt states, “He melts, and then everybody's like, but, no, don't cry, y'all,” suggesting that the movie's themes of sacrifice and resurrection are mishandled.

Social Commentary:
The episode touches on broader social issues such as body shaming and representation in media. Ben’s commentary on body image and the portrayal of gay characters critiques Hollywood's approach to inclusivity and sensitivity.

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Conclusion and Final Thoughts

As the episode wraps up, the hosts express a mixture of frustration and amusement with "Hot Frosty." Ronnie encapsulates their sentiment: “This is the most perverted and gross we'll ever get. And it's Christmas week, so enjoy yourself.”

They also tease future discussions, ensuring listeners that Part 2 will continue their critique of the film. The hosts encourage listeners to engage with their content through Patreon for exclusive episodes and content.

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Key Takeaways

• "Hot Frosty" attempts to modernize a classic tale but falls short in character development and plot consistency.
• The film's LGBTQ+ representation is criticized for being stereotypical and lacking depth.
• The hosts employ humor and irreverence to highlight the movie's shortcomings, blending critiques with comedic banter.
• Deeper themes of sacrifice and resurrection are present but poorly executed, drawing unintended parallels to religious narratives.
• Future episodes promise continued analysis, promising listeners more in-depth discussions.

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For those who haven't listened to this episode, Watch What Crappens offers a sharp and humorous critique of reality TV and pop culture phenomena, making it an engaging listen for fans of satirical commentary.

Transcript

[Ronnie]

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[Ben]

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[Ronnie]

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[Ben]

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[Ronnie]

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[Ben]

Make Whole Foods Market your holiday headquarters.

[Ronnie]

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[Ben]

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[Ronnie]

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[Ben]

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[Ronnie]

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[Ben]

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[Ronnie]

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[Ben]

Have you ever found the house of your dreams only to learn it has dark secrets?

[Ronnie]

Netflix's new series no Good Deed follows three families vying to buy a 1920s Spanish style villa that they think will solve their problems.

[Ben]

But as the sellers discover, sometimes the home of your dreams can be a total nightmare.

[Ronnie]

No Good Deed, starring Lisa Kudrow and.

[Ben]

Ray Romano, is now playing only on Netflix.

[Ronnie]

Watch what happen. Who cares what happens when there's so much that happens?

[Poodle]

All right, we're here, we're ready. If you're listening to On Crap and Speed, you're Saying, who is this queen? But if you're on Reality, guys, you know who this is, and you all should know, this is. This is Gay Crappings. The fifth annual Gay Crappings with Ronnie and Ben from Watch what Crappens. And myself and Poodle from Reality Gays.

[Matt]

First, the fifth anniversary.

[Poodle]

Welcome, everyone.

[Ben]

Maddie and Poodle from Reality Gays welcome, everybody. You guys are so cute. I can't believe we've been doing this five years. I've only had a relationship with Ben longer than this.

[Poodle]

I think mine is Poodle. So we're. Yeah, there we go.

[Ben]

That's.

[Poodle]

Yeah. Our work husbands. Although Poodle hates it when I say that. I know y'all say that, but he hates.

[Matt]

I need to always be unattached.

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Ben]

I say my partner a lot, and it really confuses people.

[Poodle]

I do, too.

[Ben]

And then I'm like, I love being single. I am so sick of men. God damn it. Yeah. And my partner. And they're like, whoa, wow. That you have that attitude with a partner.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. You know what's so fun?

[Matt]

You're just talking like Kathy.

[Ronnie]

Well, this last season of Below. I'm not below deck of Top Chef. This guy Dan, the, like, Wisconsin guy in the first episode, he's like, well, my. My partner and I opened up this restaurant 10 years ago, and the entire season, I just thought he was gay. I thought he and his gay husband opened up a restaurant, and at the end, it's like, oh, no, he has, like, a wife. And he was talking about his business partner. I'm just. I just immediately take it to a gay place every time.

[Matt]

It ruins your fantasy. Midwestern. He didn't.

[Ben]

Queer bait because he wasn't even cuter. It wasn't like a fantasy or anything like that. It was just like, oh, we should try to be nice to him because we're meaner, I think, sometimes to gayer people, you know, I think it's because, like, we better, you know, and. Which is so wrong to do. But, you know, sometimes, I mean, I know I feel like if there's a gay person, I'm like, I should try and be nicer to them. And it never goes that way, but I'm trying. So when I really make an effort and then I find out somebody's just queer baiting, you know, fuck off.

[Poodle]

I've gone out with you in person at bars and seen this actually happen where you're talking to someone, you're having a nice conversation, and then you say something and they get pissed and storm off. I've seen It. Several times. You're not lying at all.

[Ronnie]

Well, I'll tell you one thing. I know one person. Ronnie would never cause the storm off a hot snowman come to life who has, for some reason, an insatiable need to like Ronnie. Because that's. That's the show. That was a terrible segue. No, that was.

[Poodle]

No.

[Ben]

You could just say, shut the up, Queens. It's time to recap a movie that's.

[Poodle]

Actually not a terrible segue. To talk about this movie. We're going to talk about Hot Frosty, which is available on NetFL. But no, you did. You perfectly and aptly described the movie. But it's just the movie concept is that bad and that clunky that you can't describe it eloquently.

[Ronnie]

There's no way the movie pit. The pitch to the studios.

[Matt]

What was the pitch?

[Poodle]

What was the pitch?

[Ronnie]

Okay, so we all know the story of Frosty the Snowman, which is that a snowman comes to life, he has fun. He gets trapped in a greenhouse and dies.

[Ben]

Yes.

[Ronnie]

Okay. But, like, that's fun. You know, the thing is this. It's 2024. Yes. We like body positivity, but also, what if the snowman. What if Frosty is just in shape? And that's like, sure, let's do it. Let's add Lacey Charbet. Charvet. Charbot.

[Matt]

Not like Javert, who is basically Craig Robinson the whole time.

[Ronnie]

Yes.

[Ben]

I actually would have preferred that. I would have preferred a Javert. Frosty.

[Matt]

Yes.

[Ben]

No. Man stole my bread.

[Ronnie]

And then. And then. And then Ted Sarandos. And netfl says, you know what? I'm on board for this. But hold on. I think what this movie needs for no good reason, let's just add Lauren Holly to it. Sure. Okay. Green lit. It's going.

[Ben]

She saved it.

[Matt]

And Katie Mixon is the doctor.

[Ben]

She's. She's great, too.

[Poodle]

Oh, they were the best.

[Ronnie]

The. The cast actually seemed like they were having a great time on this movie.

[Ben]

They did.

[Ronnie]

They were having a great time.

[Matt]

Was the. Is this the best thing that we've covered?

[Poodle]

No.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Matt]

Oh, I think it is. I think it is.

[Ben]

Well, here's why I think so. Because I squirted some salties in the end.

[Matt]

No, I was charmed by this movie. I cannot believe I cried a little bit.

[Ben]

I was like, oh, my God.

[Poodle]

I feel like I enjoyed my school dick. I liked Falling for Christmas with Lindsay Moore. I think. I think that's the one I like.

[Matt]

No, that was a dumb movie.

[Poodle]

Although, you know how. You know how Ben and I feel about Aaron O'Connell.

[Ronnie]

That's the thing. I feel like Aaron. We will discuss this shortly. But I don't know. God, this is. I honestly. It may have been that Pioneer Woman 1 was my favorite because it was so bad. It was so bad, it made no sense that it was hilarious. Like, Holiday was actually maybe the best made one. But, like, it was. It was like.

[Ben]

It's like basically Sophie's Choice, but where you want the Nazis to kill all of your babies.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. Reverse Sophie's Choice.

[Poodle]

I ended up. So I watched this with two of my. Two of the people that live in my apartment, that are friends. They. I said, hey, I'm watching this, like, terrible movie tonight. I'm taking notes, but if y'all want to come up and watch. So we watched, and then afterwards, we decided to smoke pot and watch George of the Jungle. And we realized it's the same exact.

[Matt]

No, it's in Sino Man. It's Encino man plus Christmas.

[Poodle]

There's literally. They look. There's a scene of the television. It's just the same. So I think probably the pitch was Encino man, but make it Christmas, right?

[Ben]

It's like Splash, too. No, except in Splash, at least they made Daryl Hannah. Like, she was like, what. What is English? What is eating? How do you walk? And this guy just didn't know certain things. Like, he knew everything else. It's like he had slight amnesia, but he knew how to speak. He knew how to watch tv.

[Matt]

That was the most inconsistent thing about the whole thing, is what he knew and he. What he didn't know. Yeah.

[Ronnie]

You know what? I actually just saw a movie that. This was 100% like the Mary Kayla Turner story. It was a woman who. An adult woman taking it.

[Matt]

And the snowman was Billy Falau. Yeah.

[Ronnie]

Yes. Of a. Of a person who maybe was not at the emotional or just life.

[Ben]

You're right, though, that there was a lot. There were a lot of issues.

[Matt]

I honestly. I honestly. That was the first thought when I had. When I saw it. I think I put in our text. I'm really concerned about the ethics of a human being a snowman. Because it'd be like. Like someone. It'd be like Nell, you know, like someone who's not really. Not really, like, mentally where you should be to somebody.

[Ronnie]

Also, like a very. A very. He has a very frigid body temperature, and I just cannot imagine his. His manhood, how that would feel in certain parts.

[Poodle]

What is.

[Ben]

Well, also, you're murdering. It's like. It's like having a disease and somebody. You will be held liable. You can't do that. And that's what she would be Chucks him because she knows that warmth kills him. And what do you think? Vagina. I mean, in theory, vaginas, I'm assuming, are warm.

[Poodle]

Not familiar.

[Ben]

It would kill him. She would take off his wiener and he would die from having sex. That's true. And that's why they didn't have sex. And then he inexplicably. Well, I don't want to give away the ending because I know people are like, you know, already on pins and needles, y'all.

[Ronnie]

We.

[Poodle]

We can't talk about the ending until hour five of this podcast because, yes, there's going to be that many parts. So buckle.

[Ben]

Oh, yeah. But I do want to warn you guys one thing before we get this ball really rolling down a hill to make a big fat snowman, which is.

[Ronnie]

How they should be.

[Ben]

Fucking body shaming bitches. This is a very dirty podcast. Matt and Jake are both disgusting. Ben and I are very sweet, innocent gays. These two are complete trash.

[Matt]

Get ready.

[Ben]

And we would not have it any other way. This is the most perverted and gross we'll ever get. And it's Christmas week, so enjoy yourself. We love. We love you guys and are so co. Glad to be here. I just wanted to warn anybody and.

[Ronnie]

And the tradition also is. Is that we wind up speaking for so long that we divide the recap over many episodes. And I think usually our first episode, we cover about the first 30 seconds.

[Poodle]

Yeah, yeah.

[Matt]

The title.

[Ronnie]

The title is more just like the. This is the discussion. This is a. The. We're looking. Settling Bird's eye view at the. Settling into this the cinematic masterpiece.

[Poodle]

I'm actually wearing a shirt that a sissy. That's what we call our listeners made for me. It said Jake has one too. It's called justice for Gamora. And there's a scene of justice for Gonorrhea with the gay flag and poodle. Can you explain the shirt?

[Matt]

Yes, because I. I talked about how in the Bible they talk about Sodom and Gomorrah and sodomy has a whole. Sodom has a whole crime.

[Poodle]

And I was like, yeah, why does sodomy.

[Matt]

And I said, what is Gamora ing? Or you got Gamora. And I would say, maybe it's something like. Like just something just filthy having to do with a vagina. And I said, justice for Gamora. And it kind of became something.

[Poodle]

And so justice.

[Ben]

I saw the Italian show Gamora I love that. But I don't know what Gamoring would be. Yeah, Sodom is. But. But stuff. Yeah, but there's nothing worse than butt stuff. I mean, but stuff. I feel like biblically, but stuff gives you everything. I mean, really monkeypox now, like, every pestilence for the gays starts with but sex. I think everything else is okay, Right? Unless you have a cut in your mouth. Maybe Gamora is having a cut in your mouth.

[Poodle]

It's when you get a mouth like a throat yeast infection.

[Matt]

Oh, the worst.

[Ben]

The All Michael Douglas.

[Poodle]

Yeah. I don't know. Maybe. I don't know. You get Dutch sword in your grandma's alley. I don't know.

[Ronnie]

I'm just thinking here. I'm just really in my mind. I'm quiet. Not because I'm offended. I'm just, like, going through the mental rolodex of, like, what are our sinful, sinful sins that have not been named yet that require a Gamora label?

[Matt]

I had a whole thing of speculating about urethral stuff.

[Ben]

It went really gross.

[Matt]

I don't.

[Poodle]

Poodle don't.

[Matt]

And people, like, at one point, listeners just went, y'all, stop talking about this.

[Ben]

This is just.

[Matt]

This is.

[Poodle]

Yeah, I'm not gonna let him go into that snowman.

[Ben]

This is.

[Ronnie]

We're talking about hot snowmen here today, and we're not talking about hot Nikamora disease.

[Matt]

Yes. Can I ask just an honest question? I don't think any of you will be able to convince me otherwise. I'm convinced that Hot Frosty was a placeholder title that they always intended to change.

[Ronnie]

Yes.

[Matt]

And then on the key art day it was due, they're like, we can't get the title. Oh, my God.

[Ronnie]

It kind of works.

[Matt]

It kind of works.

[Ronnie]

Like, in fact, they probably actually did come up with a title that was called, like, Hope Springs Hot or something or something like that. Like, you know what? Let's just go back to Hot Frosty. It really just says everything we need to know.

[Matt]

Yeah.

[Ben]

And I think a fat person did it because someone was probably like, but a Frosties are gross when they're hot. And a fat person was like, girl, I got in my car one time is 110, and I still had my melted Frosty. And it was delicious. Because I've done it. I've done it multiple times. I'll melt a Frosty. You know, it's just some chubby person. They're like, let's just torture a thin person for this whole thing and make him run around in no clothes and 10 degrees.

[Poodle]

No clothes, and a scarf glued to his dick.

[Ronnie]

I also. Yes. And I also would like to point out that there is no one or nothing in this movie named Frosty.

[Matt]

Yes.

[Ronnie]

So they're just. They're just coasting. I mean, there's maybe an illusion because he puts on something that says Jack, but he never says, oh, does he say his name is Jackie?

[Poodle]

He says his name is Jack, but.

[Matt]

They did thing says Jack Frost that, you know. Do you remember the movie Michael Keaton? The Michael Keaton movie with Jack where he was called Jack Frost and he was a snowman.

[Ronnie]

I don't remember that.

[Poodle]

I don't remember this.

[Ronnie]

Unfortunately. I don't remember. I remember the movie.

[Ben]

I heard him on smart list, and I think he was drunk.

[Ronnie]

I think you'd have to be if you've had Jack Frost on your IMDb.

[Ben]

Is that a Michael Keaton thing? Is he. Does he have a problem with that? I was like, I think this guy's wasted.

[Matt]

He got a resurgence after Birdman. Like, yeah, that was kind of his, like, coming back. The thing. Look this up. But, like, the screenwriter Russell Hainlein, I had to just figure this out. And his IMD picture is him with, like, a blue devil shirt and a hat on and a beer.

[Ben]

Oh.

[Matt]

So it looks like he's just a bro. And there was thing on his, like, X account saying, I wrote this movie in 2021 thinking, what if a snowman was hot? So he's just apparently this dude, bro, screenwriter, who loves Scorsese. And it told me.

[Ronnie]

And he's a student of Save the Cat, perhaps.

[Matt]

Yes.

[Ben]

I found it interesting that they chose to make a film about a lady who's terribly unhappy and then stays terribly unhappy. It's really odd because normally in these, they make. They. They're like, it's a crabby lady. But then she gets dick, and she's suddenly happy because that's all ladies, really me. But this one, nope, she's miserable right until the end. She's like, I mean, I kind of like you now, but I don't even think she cracks a smile. I mean, she's just gonna stay miserable forever. There's nothing to heal. Lacey.

[Ronnie]

She also has some real mental health issues. In fact, I think this entire town has, like, some things that need to be considered. Like, this would be, like, the sort of thing that, like, maybe a team of specialists should come in and, like, discuss with people. Because, you know, like, we're used to these movies where people believe in the miracles of Christmas, Etc. But they're just a little too comfortable with the idea that he was a snowman.

[Matt]

Especially the doctor.

[Poodle]

We're gonna talk about the doctor.

[Ronnie]

That doctor. Okay. Let me tell you something. I guarantee that doctor was. She was in the plandemic documentary. I'm telling you that right now.

[Matt]

Yeah. She's supposed to be the adult in the room. And she's the first one who's like, like, yep, definitely a snowman. Who's turned into a man. Sure.

[Poodle]

Yeah.

[Ronnie]

She, like, says it with authority. The rest of the movie, she's like, guys, no, I told you. Snowman.

[Matt]

Yeah. Come on. Everyone knows he's a snowman. Obviously. In medical school, I learned that the Rothschilds own everything and he's a snowman.

[Ronnie]

She is now working directly under rfk.

[Matt]

Yeah.

[Poodle]

Yeah. Because at first you go, that's so crazy. But then you think about the world like, you're like, oh, that actually made more sense. That actual plot point made more sense than a lot of other things.

[Ben]

Well, it would be a good RFK learner because it would be a good RFK remake because hot. Frosty, you know, like, he's eating healthier. RFK is like, even. Look at Frosty. I've even made Frosty hot. You're welcome, Americo.

[Ronnie]

I once hit Frosty with my car and tied it to my rear and dropped Frosty off in Central park and.

[Matt]

Cut off his head.

[Ben]

That's such a good idea, by the way. I was like, that is just so bold. Like, I always think, what if I killed somebody? You know, that would be so hard to get rid of them. Just love the boldness of just.

[Matt]

You can't top. You can't stop talking about it.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Poodle]

We've actually went. What? Poodle once went on a rant.

[Ronnie]

Actually killed someone.

[Poodle]

Yeah.

[Ronnie]

What? Oh, no, I'm just kidding.

[Poodle]

Probably. I was like, why?

[Matt]

I actually killed someone.

[Poodle]

But Poodle went on like. Like a very queer allegory of the story of Frosty the Snowman.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Matt]

Well, it was. That's cartoon.

[Poodle]

The one he saw.

[Matt]

That's. That's Rudolph scared you.

[Poodle]

The first one. Right?

[Matt]

Frosty. The Frosty cartoon. The allegory freaked me the out because it was all. And this one continued that allegory because this very, like, Christ sacrificing himself stuff.

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Matt]

Was all the way through. Is all the way through. Frosty, the. The cartoon. Because in the end, like, that evil magician who has the hat, who. Brian, is like, I'm going to find Frosty.

[Poodle]

And.

[Matt]

And he's like, chasing him around. He's probably because he's so gay. It's like, I want to butt him.

[Poodle]

He made hot Frosty.

[Ronnie]

That.

[Matt]

And yeah, that makes sense if the magician made the hot Frosty. So he just wants his hat. And this little girl is running around, and she's like, it's really cold, and she's really irresponsible. She said she runs into the. Like, the woodlands and way into the snow. And Frosty is like, it's okay, Karen. We're gonna go in this greenhouse out in the middle of nowhere, and I'm gonna stay with you. And he dies for her.

[Ronnie]

He does greenhouse. Which, by the way, it's not even. Why is there a greenhouse in the middle? Thank you. What pot farmer is working in this town?

[Matt]

That might as well have been the cross. And he. He dies for her. And he go. He melts and. And she wakes up.

[Poodle]

Ronnie, I promise you, this is how it goes. Ronnie.

[Matt]

Ronnie. This is exactly what happens.

[Ronnie]

This is what happens.

[Ben]

Why did Frosty. Why was he brought to life? The hat just fell on him in the. In the first.

[Matt]

Blew onto him and. Because Jimmy Durante said it would.

[Ben]

Okay, well, Jimmy Durante. I mean, talk about a Jesus story. Okay, so that the hat blew onto him, and it brought him to life.

[Matt]

And then died for your sins.

[Ben]

Listen here, kids, I ain't eating for 40 years.

[Matt]

Do this in remembrance of me.

[Ben]

So, no, Frosty came alive. Then what was the little girl's issue? Like, what was her.

[Matt]

She was annoying and ran around and got lost and.

[Ben]

Yeah, then the magician wanted to kill the little girl.

[Poodle]

Why is she an orphan or did she not have one parent?

[Matt]

She's a child. And, you know, child. Children are used in these kind of stories. Yeah, I feel like they're used to.

[Ben]

Really every kind of. Unless it's the story of the making of the iPhone, I don't want to hear about it. You know what I mean? I need some video of children working or I. I don't have.

[Matt]

Basically, he melts, and then everyone's like, but, no, don't cry, y'all. Every. Every Christmas. Frosty. Chris. Frosty is made of Christmas snow or some like, this movie tried to sell us. And he'll come back every Christmas like Jesus did. And it's so weird. And I thought about it, and I said it on our podcast, and people were like that. Me up, too. So I've always hated that special story.

[Ben]

I mean, why are you so traumatized by Jesus? Don't be traumatized by Christ. Be traumatized by the Christians.

[Matt]

I think it was just how heavy it was, how heavy the metaphor was as a child.

[Ben]

Yeah, I think so. Yeah.

[Poodle]

I just found out Google grew up doing Bible quizzes and I thought it.

[Matt]

Was like not a Bible quiz, Bible drill.

[Poodle]

I thought he was just doing it in Sunday school. No, there was literally a hierarchical competition. No, they were competed in.

[Matt]

There were like state and district competitions.

[Ben]

Oh, they're coming back.

[Matt]

Everything old is new again.

[Ben]

It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappin's commercial.

[Ronnie]

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[Ben]

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[Ronnie]

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[Ben]

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[Ronnie]

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[Ben]

Especially when it's told by a full cast like that, like it's a full production. It's going to be like a radio.

[Ronnie]

Play, you know, that's major.

[Ben]

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[Ronnie]

As the resident Jew of this this group right here today, I will say that when I saw Frosty, the Jesus metaphor did not really land with me in the same way. It hits a little different.

[Ben]

It does.

[Ronnie]

That being said, like, you love Frosty because he's like a snowman and then he dies in a cartoon that's supposed to be like a holiday cartoon.

[Matt]

I know.

[Ben]

Well, nothing's happy in children's stories from back then, you know? I mean, look at Charlie Brown. I can't even believe they still play that Charlie Brown thing. It's the saddest thing. The whole thing's done in mine in the minor key. Like, what are you guys even doing? I. I never found that interesting as a kid. I was like, oh, God, here's that song.

[Matt]

I loved it because I was a very dark child.

[Ben]

Yeah, you liked it?

[Ronnie]

It's a really sad sound.

[Matt]

I loved it because I was a dark child. But even. Even Frosty the Special was too dark for me.

[Ben]

Wow.

[Matt]

I was. It got me into thinking too much about my own mortality as an eight year old.

[Ben]

Oh, God. I was just like, oh, is death like a nap? Just bring it on. Then, like, what are we waiting for?

[Matt]

But he comes back every Christmas, folks.

[Ben]

Wow.

[Ronnie]

Frosty is eternal. But Frosty never quite makes a transition from snowman to. To real man.

[Matt]

And with a penis.

[Ronnie]

With a penis. But then when you go on couples dates and you say, how did you guys meet? And you have to explain like, oh, we met. Funny story. There was a hot, hot, hot snowman. Someone did like a muscular. Some. Some gay child in town. Not addressed and not seen. We never even met. Who made the snowman.

[Matt]

No, no, we didn't. Yeah, that's.

[Poodle]

That's what. That's. I wanted to know who made this because, yes, it had to be a queen that made this snowman.

[Ben]

There's some horny old gay. Because we didn't see any gays. We saw everybody else, I feel like. But no gay.

[Ronnie]

There were no gay illusion. This should have been a gay town. There's.

[Matt]

I was gonna say the most gay coated thing was the thrift store owner's husband because he had a kerchief on. And that was as gay coded as we got. But they were together.

[Ronnie]

Well, the. The sort of. The deputy. There was sort of like a little bit of a gay undercurrent there. And I think, though, that definitely there was a gay. There definitely was someone gay in town who made that. Because the truth is, we all know we love our straight women, but if it had been a straight woman, it would have looked like Ed Sheeran.

[Ben]

Oh, no. What are you Talking about.

[Ronnie]

Be honest.

[Ben]

Have you ever heard of Outlander, sir? It would have been some, like, stuffy English person. Pasty. It would have been the same color as the snow. That's for sure. But like, some pasty, like, I love you even in the 1800s.

[Poodle]

Yes. Or Jason Seagull. Women love Jason Siegel.

[Ben]

They really do. I've never seen a man just so successful with never working out. I mean, it's amazing goals.

[Ronnie]

John Mayer.

[Poodle]

Oh, yeah.

[Matt]

Did you. Do you guys ever see when he. He did this whole thing about. He's like, yeah, I just had to get out of Los Angeles was too much for me. I just had to get out. And the went to Ojai, like, he's like, the Hollywood life is just too much for me. The went to Ojai just moved to Ojai. No, no. Jason. Jason Siegel.

[Ronnie]

Bruno Mars, who's a. Who's an Ojai.

[Poodle]

Ojai is not the real world.

[Matt]

But I think the funny thing is he's like, I just had to get out of Hollywood. And it's like, all of Hollywood is there. What are you talking about?

[Ben]

Is it too conservative for you here? Because Ojai is really like, yeah, it's.

[Matt]

Just such a beautiful day.

[Ben]

Yeah, it's gorgeous.

[Matt]

But it's just like the. The 1% of the 1% live in Ojai.

[Ben]

Yeah. Yeah. I just had to be more real. Guys, get back to these.

[Matt]

I know.

[Poodle]

I'm so done with la. I'm moving to Montecito.

[Matt]

I can't go where the real people are.

[Ronnie]

I hear that Hot Springs, New York, is. Is a hot place to be. By the way, I would like to also point out. I'm sorry. Yes. It's called Hope Springs.

[Matt]

Hope Springs.

[Ronnie]

Interestingly enough, we got to see the license plate of a car. I think it was a very final shot.

[Matt]

I was wondering where it was.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, we see it's a New York license plate. Normally these things happen in, like, a nameless state. It's. We don't really know where they are.

[Matt]

I was thinking it was Midwestern.

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Ben]

Yeah. It's usually in the middle of the country, you know, where the real people are.

[Matt]

Because they all kind of had Midwestern accents sense, Right?

[Ronnie]

Yeah. But this was. I think we're looking at actually upstate New York. I think we might be by Utica. Maybe Troy.

[Matt]

I don't know, but everyone would have a much worse accent if it was like. Like a Buffalo accent, you know, or that's been in Buffalo.

[Ronnie]

Maybe it was Putnam County.

[Matt]

Yes.

[Poodle]

I never realized until you said Utica. How sad that sounds.

[Matt]

Oh, upstate New York is something.

[Ben]

It sounds like a woman part.

[Poodle]

Yeah, Utica.

[Matt]

I got something stuck in my Utica.

[Ben]

Yeah, doctor, get it out. Why were you playing with Twinkies again?

[Ronnie]

Maybe this was a suburban Syracuse.

[Matt]

Oh.

[Ben]

This was not real. This was. This was in our imaginations. So let's get started with the very opening. Christmas. Fairy tales have often included the wonder of a snowman coming to life.

[Ronnie]

No, that's actually a lie. I'd like to. I, I take, I take issue with.

[Matt]

Yeah, take it, take it, Ben.

[Ronnie]

Have not often included the wonder of a snowman coming to life. Only one has done that. That's frosty. Please do not try to act like every single Christmas story involves these snowmen coming to life and being whimsical. That is not true whatsoever.

[Matt]

Also try to since lie since the dawn of time. Like when after the big bang. That's when Christmas stories involving snowman started to happen.

[Ben]

Adam and Eve, big screen tv.

[Ronnie]

Also, let's give it up for whoever landed this narrator narration gig because they really, you know, they probably got paid a full rate for literally one line in the entire movie. We never heard this narrator.

[Matt]

I was gonna say that is to me one of the stupidest things to have and not a device to use over and over again.

[Poodle]

Why wouldn't you have Lacey Chabert do it? Or at least Reese Witherspoon? Because they both kind of talk the same way. I kept thinking like if you close your eyes it sound. Why not have her narrate it?

[Ben]

This movie can't afford. Reese.

[Poodle]

I, I was trying to think this movie afforded Coldplay. They could afford.

[Ronnie]

We have to talk about that.

[Matt]

Like the music budget was insane.

[Poodle]

Snowman, the song.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, they. Okay, so normally they couldn't afford it. In these movies they. Normally you can only get like some weird off brand like pseudo Christmas. Like remember, like let's not forget ladies the 80s, which by the way had a rock and song that they use.

[Matt]

Oh yeah.

[Ronnie]

Cuz we're the ladies of the 80s.

[Matt]

Younger than we've ever been. I still think about that sometimes than we've ever been.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, they've, they've. Yes. They've never. They're at negative three years.

[Matt]

Every time we sing the song we. We fight against the movement of time.

[Ronnie]

We remember the womb.

[Matt]

Yeah.

[Ronnie]

So no, this one had Coldplay. We had Rocking around the Christmas Tree. The original version, Brenda Lee. And then there was another, there was another song that I was like, I can't believe they got the Rights to this song.

[Matt]

They had Pretty Woman. Pretty Woman.

[Poodle]

That's an expensive song. That's an expensive song to get.

[Matt]

I think the Royal Arbus is very litigious.

[Ben]

They are. Yeah. That guy needs to pay for all his below deck appearances.

[Poodle]

Oh, yeah, Yeah.

[Ronnie]

I want to go up against the Orbison estate.

[Matt]

No, no. Oh, so many lawyers.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Ronnie]

But they have that Netflix budget here, so we really could hear it with the. With the. With the licensed music.

[Poodle]

I just want even the actors. I mean, this Lacey Shiver. Yeah. She's kind of famous for Lifetime movies and Hallmark stuff now.

[Matt]

The Hallmark connection.

[Poodle]

But hot frosty guy. I can't remember. He was just a million.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, he was actually, like, really? Every. Almost every single person on screen was someone that you, like, knew. Like Lauren Holly, for the picky businesses.

[Matt]

Fan who's had a long career. Lauren.

[Ronnie]

Long, illustrious career. You have Craig Robinson, Joe.

[Ben]

Oh, my God.

[Matt]

Angela Trio.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. And you also had. You had Katie mixing. Her name was.

[Matt]

Yeah. And she.

[Poodle]

And she had a show on for, like, seven years.

[Matt]

American Housewife.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, American Housewife. And there was, like, someone else in there. I'm sure those kids.

[Ben]

I wouldn't want to be that lady who was the lady who runs the thrift store. He's like, I don't.

[Matt]

I don't know.

[Poodle]

She actually is a Canadian actress. I looked her up because I went, so she. I think she's famous in Canada. That was their. They're like, how do we get the Canadians onto this bandwagon? And they put her.

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Matt]

All you need is some. All you need is some hockey.

[Poodle]

Only person I know from Canada is Megan Follows.

[Ben]

That's it.

[Matt]

It.

[Ronnie]

I heard the role. It was really down to her or like Mary K. Plays and Mary Kay plays.

[Ben]

Pass.

[Matt]

She says it wasn't realistic.

[Ben]

Oh, I love Mary Kay place. She always looks like she's about to start crying.

[Matt]

Always.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Matt]

That's why she's cast.

[Ronnie]

She needs so much more appreciation.

[Ben]

Okay, okay.

[Poodle]

Back to the British narrator destined to.

[Ben]

Bring his magic to the right person. But those fairy tales have never been told like. Like this. And an alarm is ringing. And a hand turns the alarm off. And we have a woman on the radio.

[Ronnie]

It's another beautiful morning here in Hope Spring radio station.

[Matt]

You immediately think Groundhog Day. This person really just shook a bunch of tropes and threw them in and said, yeah, I'm gonna be shameless about most of them. And then I'm gonna put a couple of others that you only think of and just see, there were a couple. A lot of mean girls references. Did you guys there.

[Ronnie]

Yes. Well, yeah, I'm go put a pin in that because I have something to say about that when we get there.

[Matt]

So.

[Ronnie]

So basically the. The DJ says and we want to remind you to grab those kiddos and head on down to the annual snow sculpture competition where you can see several classics snowman and one homoerotic one. Imagine one realistic naked muscle clad snowman.

[Matt]

And I'm. I'm confused about this competition which is like the sculpt the ice, the ice sculpture, the snow sculptures competition. Do you have to be an artist to join? Because obviously not. Because there's a bunch of like what I call three ball snowmen. Just like balls stacked on top of.

[Poodle]

Each other and classic. So classic. Why would you.

[Matt]

Why would you decide if you're going to be in a snow sculptures, why are you making a classic snowman? And my favorite is there were the. Some of the. I'm calling them three balls because that's what it looks like to me. Just three. And then just. So there was like four of those surrounding the Michelangelo, like David sculpture. So like some kids made that next to that like artistic queen who was sculpting his David for three days.

[Ben]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ronnie]

And that, by the way, whatever that sweet, adorable gay boy was who made that, like, isn't he like. I spent a week making a realistic snowman. Now it's gone where the put a.

[Poodle]

Magical scarf on it. And also, why would you.

[Matt]

I was going to win.

[Ronnie]

I was going to. Maybe he did. Because guess what? Even though the movie literally starts with an announcement of the big snow sculpture competition, guess what? We never see it's abandoned sort of form. We don't see judges, we don't see deliberations. We don't see. I thought that was going to be sabotage.

[Matt]

I thought that was going to be one of the plot points that like, that was going to be. But alas, that's.

[Ben]

They did this whole thing where they. They're like, the cop really cares about the town and he's always trying to find crimes and so he's going to do whatever he can to prosecute petty crimes. But someone stole a sculpture from the competition and nobody's like, he doesn't care. I mean, why didn't they make it that like this guy, you know, like, we saw the sculpture, but then we didn't see it. And all we saw was this guy. He should have. That should have been the crime that the guy did something, you know, but they didn't have to make up some. You Know you have it right here, Ronnie.

[Ronnie]

That would be so much better if they could have tied the crime into the actual concept here, because literally the entire conflict of the movie, the entire. The stakes of this movie is that, like, someone broke a window.

[Matt]

It is.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Matt]

And then the people aren't going to press charges. It should be all over, and they're not going to. And.

[Ben]

And.

[Matt]

And so the only thing now is streaking, and you only saw an old man and an old. And the old woman probably didn't give a. Because she just wants dick. She's just dick crazy.

[Ben]

Yeah, well, it's also. It would also have been a really good chance to bring in a gay. Because if it had been a gay sculptor and this happened and then he was the one that saved the. Like, maybe it's the gay sculptor. And he came back and he was like, you know what? I think you're good. Even though nobody else does. Nobody else gets you. I'm going to give you this scarf. And then it came back, and it was after the gay guy. It's like, the gay guy never gets to date anything or has any love because he lives in this little town, but now he finally has a snowman to fall in love with. And, you know, people can't approve because it's like, gay and snowman fucking.

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Ben]

And so he has to, like, really fight the system, and it would have fucking meant something instead of Lacy, who's just like, I'm sad, and I'm still going to be sad by the end of this, so just take off your shirt, and I'll just watch you while I'm sad.

[Poodle]

Maybe that's what would have been very.

[Ronnie]

Compelling if you have it, like, this guy makes a snowman of, like, his perfect man. Like, yes. His dream man. He's closeted, and then some comes along, puts a scarf on him, and this guy is like, oh, you.

[Matt]

I spent weeks in planning, and you like her. I'm the one who created you.

[Ronnie]

Don't you know how big it works?

[Ben]

Because, look, we created love with somebody by showing a regular person how to accessorize. I mean, it's just such a gay story, you know? Yeah. And this. I feel like it was stolen from us.

[Ronnie]

Honesty. In all honesty, I would say, like, for real, the story should have been that, like, he comes to life, and now this person who had made this sculpture and, like, actually needs to win this competition to, like, win the prize, to make their ends meet.

[Ben]

They're.

[Ronnie]

Now they can't be in the prize anymore. And so basically, like, Hot. Frosty has to, like, become a snowman again.

[Matt]

Yes.

[Ronnie]

You have to decide do I live like this or to become a snowman against. This kid could win the. The competition, you know, and this could.

[Poodle]

I think too. I really am all about I. Even though maybe it's type bring back gay villains because none are better. Like, to me, I think.

[Matt]

I think it would have been so.

[Poodle]

Much better like, if the guy.

[Matt]

And.

[Poodle]

The whole time he's looking for his any like, imagine like John Barrowman or like Peter Page from Queer as Folk. Like some old gay. No, John Barrelman's working a lot like.

[Matt]

But old gay. No, you need to go even older. You need to go like 70s gay or.

[Ronnie]

Or a lady who the gays would love.

[Poodle]

Oh, Rupert Everett. Rupert Everett.

[Ben]

Oh, he would be good. He would be good.

[Poodle]

He could have been the gay British narrator.

[Ben]

Yeah, I think that's what. I think that's such a good idea. Taking out the evil person who stole his sculpture. And he thinks the whole town is against him.

[Matt]

He would have gone full Shakespearean. Yeah.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Poodle]

And he wants to make his. He wants to win the contest. So he wants to turn Frosty back into a snowman.

[Ronnie]

Yes. That's actually not a ripen.

[Ben]

Frosty teacher to love. And then Frosty melts. That's a better way.

[Poodle]

Christina, take this out. We're gonna make this movie.

[Matt]

We just fixed it. We just fixed this film.

[Ronnie]

Like, we literally fixed it.

[Ben]

We just made such a good film. And Matt was. When we were all watching it yesterday, Matt sent us a text. That was some girl on tv. Tick tock. He's like, guys, I just watched Hot Frosty on Netflix. Art is not dead alert. Art.

[Matt]

People are genuinely liking it. Like, it's. It's. People are liking this movie.

[Ben]

I didn't like it until the end because if something makes me cry when I automatically like it, the end ruined it.

[Matt]

I just thought the end was bad. But we'll.

[Ben]

He died, everybody. Sorry, everybody. Spoiler alert. He died.

[Matt]

Daddy didn't.

[Ronnie]

Well, well, here's the thing. Did he die? Because we know the story about Frost.

[Ben]

Snowman died. Maybe the human didn't, but the snowman died. And who wants a human? Any man who's called Christ.

[Poodle]

Like, he died and was resurrected. I just got it.

[Ben]

This is.

[Matt]

This is just like our show, y'all. Whenever I say anything gone. And then when someone explains it to him, he's like, oh, I understand.

[Poodle]

Especially religious stuff because I was raised Catholic. We didn't really talk about the Bible a lot. We just did like other stuff.

[Matt]

Yeah. So the resurrection's kind of soft pedaling.

[Poodle]

We're like, it's fine. Like, I don't know, licidious. I don't know those books, whatever.

[Matt]

And so, yeah, I am always shook by your. The amount of religious knowledge you lack.

[Poodle]

Being raised in a Catholic church book of Gary. I haven't read it. I don't know.

[Ben]

So.

[Ronnie]

So anyway, Kathy wakes up, she hears this. So, okay, first of all, no one.

[Poodle]

This age is named Kathy.

[Matt]

That's what I wrote down to no one.

[Ronnie]

Well, I know someone named. I know. I know a Kathy.

[Matt]

Like a 34 year old. How. How old is Lacey?

[Ronnie]

Okay, first of all, she's 42. I want to point this out. She's 42. I looked up her age. So here's this lady, A lady for a 42 year old woman. She's waking up and the DJ is saying that the snow sculpture competition is finally underway. Like everyone has been waiting. All year long they've been watching this gay kid chisel out in Adonis in the middle of the town square. Like, can you just finish so we can finally get this underway? And she wakes up and her place is in disrepair. For a moment I was like, is she a squatter? Is this even her house? This was like this shitty house.

[Ben]

It's a real fear. Yeah, yeah. She wasn't paying the bills. Like the heater doesn't work and she's just. So this is the thing about this character. And I thought surely this is her arc is getting happy because her whole opening is like, oh my God, the alarm clock went off. Oh God, the house is freezing. I fell getting out of bed. I was like, okay, she's miserable, so surely she'll be happy. But no, she. It just continues. And then we see she passes by a picture of some dude and I thought it was her dad, which I.

[Matt]

Feel so I thought it was too. It was because the bad Photoshop, it was really bad. He kind of looked like John Anson from the who are like the Addams Family, the series. Like Gomez.

[Poodle]

He did. But they even. Even up the picture of Lacey Chabert. I thought it was maybe her mom and dad. It was so AI her.

[Matt]

Her hand was as big as her face when it was like laying there next to him. It was such so badly photoshopped. I laughed. It was really bad.

[Ronnie]

Party of five commercials.

[Matt]

Here comes one right now.

[Ronnie]

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[Ronnie]

One thing that they one visual thing that they repeat over and over again in her hovel is that when she goes down the stairs, she has to skip a step step because there's a gaping hole in the stairs.

[Matt]

Yeah, what's that happen?

[Ben]

Girl, you never made a hole on the stairs. I've done it. God, has no one else here been almost £400. I did it. Now I know that she didn't do it. But you know, maybe I lived there before.

[Poodle]

Maybe they were moving a couch like on Friends or whatever and they like it fell like a corner, hit the.

[Ronnie]

Stairs, little mice to come out and like get her dressed, wouldn't you?

[Matt]

Just like. Like, that had to be very dangerous. Like, you would definitely put your foot through it, like, every three or four days.

[Ben]

Maybe that's how her husband died.

[Poodle]

I don't know.

[Matt]

No, that was cancer. Which. What's cancer?

[Ben]

Well, maybe she's just saying that because she didn't want to admit that she never had him fix the stair and that's how he died.

[Ronnie]

Someone should look under that staircase. Yeah, it's just like. It was like this big gaping hole.

[Matt]

Yeah.

[Ben]

How was the frosty. Not the spirit of her dead husband, by the way? You know, that's another missed opportunity.

[Matt]

I thought we were get there. I thought somehow we were gonna get there too.

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Matt]

But no, no.

[Ronnie]

Why is no one checking in on Kathy? Like, like, why are people not like this town?

[Poodle]

Everyone knows she's so beloved in the community.

[Ben]

They.

[Poodle]

And like, such a. Everybody's like, hi, Kathy Hack. And I'm like, where I'm from, people will be like, hey, Kathy's husband died of cancer. Let's go bring her some casseroles.

[Matt]

Bring her a casserole.

[Poodle]

She'd bring her husband, say, look, Wardell, she's got a hole in her stare. And Wardell would fix the stair.

[Ben]

That's live here alone. She's got a broken stare. No, man, if my dad walked in.

[Poodle]

That house, he'd be like, well, God damn. God damn. Kathy can't even walk up the stairs. I guess I better fix it. And he would.

[Ben]

I may not hug, but I do fix things. And I'm gonna show you my love with fix. Don't they even.

[Ronnie]

I mean, like, don't they even notice the way Kathy's face just sort of falls whenever they're sitting around saying, God, isn't it so nice to have a full set of stairs that aren't broken? And she just looks down in her lap like. Like, don't they realize she's not contributing to that?

[Matt]

I thought this movie was gonna be in a while. I thought this was going to be a movie about grief. And I thought, like, and about learning to move on. I'm like, okay, this is. That's what this movie is about. But it's not. It's not about that. And it was very, very frustrating for me.

[Ronnie]

Just, it's. It's just someone who does not take care of their house.

[Ben]

No.

[Ronnie]

And she's gonna say it's because of the grief. Grief. But, like, the truth is, it's like she's just not taking care of the house.

[Ben]

Yeah, well, it's hard, you know, and especially in the cold. Like, I get it. But I'm also like, move, you know? But then we find out in the next little scene. Oh, well, first, I'm sorry, we have. We have things going on. So she goes to the restaurant. So we find out. Yeah, yeah, Kathy with the K's Diner, you know, But I would never do that name at Ronnie's because people know who to on on when they don't like it. You know what I mean? Everybody sucks. I hate the to go containers. Ronnie.

[Poodle]

Ronnie. Also, didn't they steal the art? Is this from a Johnny Rockets or like a Ruby? Like, they didn't even try.

[Matt]

It was very. It was like the cafe at Disney's Cars. That's what it looked like to me.

[Ronnie]

I listen, this is a woman who is not fixing her heat or her staircase, so she is not gonna get brand new branding. She's like, you ever see like a restaurant around town that clearly, like found some other restaurants sign in the in.

[Poodle]

Like that is what happened.

[Ben]

Yes.

[Ronnie]

A rename changed. Like an S. Added an S to it from like Kate's Cafe to Skate's Cafe. Yeah, like, that's what Kathy's doing here.

[Matt]

And it's the same teacup. That goddamn same teacup.

[Poodle]

Also, the name tags are so egregiously large.

[Ronnie]

They are.

[Ben]

All right. This.

[Matt]

This is a novelty restaurant.

[Poodle]

No, I'm sorry. The art direction was on this show.

[Ronnie]

It felt like.

[Matt]

Yeah, it did feel like a pop up.

[Poodle]

And like that one on Melrose, that Johnny Rockets, that was a pop up for a while. It was like To Save by the Bell restaurant. Yes.

[Ronnie]

Golden Girls. It's like Kathy just is doing like.

[Matt]

A popup experience, but it just stayed there. People love the soup.

[Ronnie]

They also have nowhere else to go. There's no other business in town.

[Matt]

It's a small town. Yeah.

[Ben]

So Isaac, who works for her, he's the chef. He's like the grumpy chef. Yeah, but he's grumpy. But he just wants to make sure she's had food and she's fixed her heater, but of course she hasn't, you know, and he's like, you're gonna freeze to death. And if you do, who's gonna sign my checks? I know, Isaac.

[Matt]

I know.

[Poodle]

We get it. She owns it.

[Ronnie]

Isaac, why don't you help out a little bit? This is a woman who is grieving and she is a little stuck. So go like. Like, you guys all will rally together for a fricking snowman later. Why don't you rally for Kathy for once.

[Ben]

Also, Isaac, maybe if you were a little more dependable of an employee, you'd be on auto draft by now now, so you wouldn't have to be sitting around waiting for a check. She clearly still doesn't trust you because.

[Matt]

Of your former drug problem. She's a little worried about giving you a regular salary.

[Ben]

I've watched enough Top Chef to know that's the damn truth.

[Matt]

I know.

[Ronnie]

So Kathy is, you know, she's like, okay, now she's warmed up and she is happy. And the people coming in. And then all of a sudden, Kathy goes, oh, my God, my favorite customer. And this little girl comes in, and her mother is none other than Chrishell.

[Matt]

Chris Shell, yes.

[Ronnie]

From Selling Sunset, Kathy's favorite customer, who, by the way, never comes back to the room. Everyone asks him five times.

[Matt]

I have no idea why they needed to. Did Chrishell win a contest to be in the movie? I want to see such a cameo.

[Ben]

Turned in to win this, because it is true. And I was like, what the is Chrishell doing here with. With a child? And then you never see her again? And I'm like, is that to be Netflix? It's like, look, it's one of our hugest stars. But then they didn't really do cameos like that with anybody. No, it was.

[Matt]

It was way out of nowhere, and she said four words and she was gone.

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Matt]

She's an actress. She's a soap actress.

[Ronnie]

She is. I thought my favorite part was that when she walked into Kathy's cafe, that all of a sudden the music started saying, I'm a bad bad I'm a.

[Matt]

Bad bad down the street we wear.

[Ben]

Shoes Frosty ain't the only ballin'I'm a bad Frosty.

[Poodle]

I sell houses oh, that is what they need. That is what this. This all. All together as we go through this movie. I think why I liked other movies a little bit more is that there was no camp in this movie. It took itself very seriously.

[Matt]

Only.

[Poodle]

Only a couple of, like, mean girls jokes, and that's all we got.

[Matt]

No, the whole. The whole sheriff thing was camp. Camp. That was. That was. That was total camp.

[Ronnie]

I actually. The problem was it actually did not take itself seriously enough because they were so. They were having so much fun that I'm like, hey, stop. That was.

[Matt]

That was. That was my issue.

[Poodle]

I gotta say, the bloopers was the best part of the whole thing.

[Matt]

Did you feel like that all of Craig Robinson and Joe Latru's scenes were improv?

[Ben]

Yes.

[Matt]

Like I, I feel like that they, they were gonna cast a like, kind of like straight laced guy for the sheriff, and so they wrote this really serious dialogue for him. And when Craig Robinson is saying it, it sounds like it's like bigger and it's funny. But the dialogue, if you, if you take the dialogue away from Craig Robinson and had like a boring actor read it, it would be awful.

[Ronnie]

That's why Robinson literally made me laugh out loud.

[Matt]

He stole the movie.

[Ben]

Movie.

[Matt]

Yeah.

[Ronnie]

Like, I was like, I was like, how is this, this guy is finding comedy in this movie. And, like, it's good. Like, he was so funny and he was just having the best time and I just, I don't know, like, I couldn't believe how funny he was.

[Ben]

Yeah, he's a really funny guy. Okay, so then. Sorry.

[Ronnie]

She's like the daughter. Chrishell's daughter is like, do you have any chocolate chip pancakes today? And Kathy's like, well, chocolate chip pancakes are usually for Sunday brunch, but you know what? What? I'll make some if your mom says it's okay. Oh, she doesn't. So I guess you'll have to work that out with your mom. Bye.

[Matt]

That's an off menu item, kid.

[Ben]

And I knew that Chris Shelle was going to be a fat, shamy little hooker of a mother. She's like, oh, well, I guess we can make an exception today. No. You have a child and it's Christmas and she wants chocolate chips in her pancakes. Do it, Chris Shelle. Okay, don't make me hate you. You're only here for five seconds in this movie and I already hate you and want social services to come take.

[Matt]

I guess we'll, we'll move your way in till tomorrow. Exactly.

[Ben]

She's like, you're gonna need time for the Xbox to hit.

[Matt]

Yeah.

[Ronnie]

By the way, also like Kathy, though, like, this is a moment, you know, how about have chocolate pancakes every day? Why, like, reserve for Sunday brunch? What's that all about?

[Matt]

It did feel like she was excessively monitoring her children's diet.

[Poodle]

You mean like your mother?

[Matt]

Yeah. Like my mom would say, do we really need that today?

[Ben]

My mom still does it. Or she'll do this thing where she'll be like, oh, God, you know what's the worst worst? Like fat people in the crosswalk. I'm like, excuse me? You know, I'm like, hello, I'm. You know, I've lost some weight. But she would say it, like when I'm sitting there next to her, like 350, 400 pounds. I'm like, okay, if you want to say it, just say it. You don't have to, like, cloak it. You know what I mean? Leave the people on the crosswalk alone. What'd they do.

[Matt]

On the sidewalk?

[Ben]

Yeah, just kill them all. Turn them into mattresses. They're squishy.

[Ronnie]

So Chriselle allows her daughter to have chocolate chip pancakes. Okay, we'll have a seat. And she seats down her favorite customer, and then promptly leaves the restaurant to go to a thrift shop, which I feel like is not very professional.

[Matt]

Especially reclaimed rags.

[Ben]

That was weird, because I don't even think there were any workers other than the. Other than the main cook.

[Matt]

This is a front hunt.

[Poodle]

Well, no, there was that. There was our friend who was a waitress who we never understood her name or never got her name.

[Ronnie]

She was, like, the daughter of the chef. I think that was the illusion.

[Ben]

Yeah. Make it very far in this town. I'm like, who?

[Poodle]

Well, they liked having a lot of people that were siblings or children of other people that we never knew until the end anyway. And it just.

[Ben]

Yeah, that's true. That's true. They're like, well, how could you not know? They're in the same minority class.

[Poodle]

How could you not know?

[Ben]

Okay.

[Matt]

Of course, that's Greg Robbins and son.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, of course. Yeah.

[Matt]

Looks. And he's black because he has.

[Ronnie]

Of course they have some light friction that has. We are introduced to the light friction in their family dynamic, and it's resolved in three minutes.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Ronnie]

But very quickly.

[Ben]

So then. So she goes to the thrift store, as you said. What'd you say it was? Reclaimed rags.

[Matt]

Reclaimed rags by Mel and Theo. I assume they have other stores.

[Ronnie]

So this is their other stores called in the Closet.

[Poodle]

Theo is in the. I think Theo loves that store.

[Ben]

There's one over here by where I live called Unrestrained Whimsy. Please stop it. Oh, kill me, please. I want to write them a note and say, listen, you guys, please change this. You can't. You're doing bad. You're doing. You're doing a bad thing.

[Ronnie]

Michelle's lining up to go inside. She's like, I just heard about this great new thrift shop called Unrestrained Whimsy.

[Poodle]

Don't ruin the word whimsy.

[Ben]

Or is it restrained whimsy? I need to look it up. It's one of the two. Either way, it's not okay.

[Matt]

It's awful.

[Ben]

Okay, though, no, I won't go in there because of the name. I don't want to be like, ronnie. That's so cute.

[Poodle]

I Wanted to know if you stood by your convictions or you just talking.

[Matt]

For your own convictions, Ronnie.

[Ben]

Yeah, I do. And I don't go to Chick fil a either. You bunch of traders. All you gays out there. I see you in the line and.

[Matt]

I really want to. I really want to.

[Ben]

That's a huge thing to stand by that.

[Poodle]

That's why I hope if you were in the Chick fil a drive thr you're just hearing me talking about just queefing and butt farts and just gay gay Jesus sucking off Judas. All of it.

[Ronnie]

No jizz. Yeah.

[Ben]

All right, why don't we call this one and continue on the next episode. I think when we get to quee farts and Judas blowjob, time to call it.

[Ronnie]

Thanks everyone for being here today.

[Poodle]

Thank you so much.

[Ronnie]

Part one of probably several parts. Oh yeah, this movie.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Poodle]

And we promise to go quicker in.

[Matt]

The other 10 minutes into the movie. We're fine.

[Ben]

We'll be back tomorrow. Also this is multi part and it's multi podcast feed. So yes, you can listen. Go subscribe to us if you don't go subscribe to them if you don't and find a video on both of our patreons, whichever you find cheaper. Which is probably ours.

[Matt]

Probably is.

[Ben]

No lies everybody. Thank you so much for being here. We'll talk to you tomorrow. Have a merry time off during Christmas. Okay, suckers. Love you.

[Ronnie]

Watch what crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alison King it's always automatic with Ashley Otto.

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[Ben]

Sweet drinking Violet Coutar we love you guys. If you like, watch what crappens. You can listen ad free right now by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short [e-mail] survey.

[Grinch]

Hello, ladies and germs, boys and girls. The Grinch is back again to ruin your Christmas season with Tis the Grinch Holiday Podcast. After last year, he's learned a thing or two about hosting, and he's ready to rant against Christmas cheer and roast his celebrity guests like chestnuts on an open fire. You can listen with the whole family as guest stars like Jon Hamm, Brittney Broski and Danny DeVito try to persuade the mean old Grinch that there's a lot to love about the insufferable holiday season. But that's not all. Somebody stole all the children of Whoville's letters to Santa, and everybody thinks the Grinch is responsible. It's a real who Bill Whodunit. Can Cindy Lou and Max help clear the Grinch's name? Grab your hot cocoa and cozy slippers to find out. Follow Tis the Grinch Holiday Podcast on the Wondery App or wherever you get your podcasts unlock weekly Christmas mystery bonus content and listen to every episode ad free by joining Wondery in the Wondery App, Spotify or Apple Podcasts.

[Roy Raiden]

They say Hollywood is where dreams are made, a seductive city where many flock to get rich, be adored, and capture America's heart. But when the spotlight turns off, fame, fortune and lives can disappear in an instant. When TV producer Roy Raiden was found dead in a Canyon near LA in 1983, there were many questions surrounding his death. The last last person seen with him was Lainey Jacobs, a seductive cocaine dealer who desperately wanted to be part of the Hollywood elite. Together, they were trying to break into the movie industry, but things took a dark turn when a million dollars worth of cocaine and cash went missing. From Wondery comes a new season of the hit show Hollywood and Crime the Cotton Club Murder. Follow Hollywood in Crime the Cotton Club Murder on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of the Cotton Club Murder early and ad free right now by joining Wondery plus.