#2715 Below Deck Down Under S03E01: Please Don’t Sous Me

Summary

Podcast Summary: Watch What Crappens - Episode #2715: Below Deck Down Under S03E01: Please Don’t Sous Me

Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam | Wondery

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Introduction

In episode #2715 of "Watch What Crappens," hosts Ben Mandelker and Ronnie Karam dive into the season premiere of "Below Deck Down Under" Season 3 titled "Please Don’t Sous Me." Known for their candid and humorous takes on Bravo's reality TV offerings, Ben and Ronnie provide an engaging and detailed analysis of the episode, highlighting key moments, character dynamics, and setting the stage for the upcoming season's drama.

Boat Design Critique [02:28 - 06:04]

Ben and Ronnie launch their discussion by scrutinizing the yacht’s design featured in the first episode. They express frustration over the impractical layout, particularly focusing on the cumbersome staircases and unreliable elevators.

• Ben [04:24]: “This episode really... stressed me out.”
• Ronnie [05:02]: “Elevators get better.”

They humorously question the yacht’s architecture, pointing out the inefficiency of having the galley in the basement while the dining room is on the roof without a service elevator. This flawed design, they argue, sets a challenging tone for the crew.

Character Introductions and Dynamics [07:48 - 13:16]

As the episode progresses, Ben and Ronnie introduce the main cast, focusing on the newly onboard sous chef, Anthony, and his interactions with the head chef, Zarina.

• Ronnie [07:48]: “I don't know anything about geography. Okay. So I was like, Africa, Indian Ocean. Wait a minute.”
• Ben [08:37]: “‘She sells se...’ She sells seashells by the seashore.”

They poke fun at geographic inaccuracies in the show’s setting and the quirky introductions of characters. The hosts also laugh about stock footage interruptions, like the random appearance of a manta ray during conversations, adding to their critique of the episode’s production choices.

Sous Chef Antics and Crew Tensions [14:32 - 24:00]

The introduction of Anthony as the sous chef brings immediate tension aboard the yacht. Ben and Ronnie dissect the budding conflict between Anthony and Zarina, anticipating ongoing drama.

• Ben [14:32]: “It's gonna be a shit show between the two of them.”
• Ronnie [16:07]: “If that sous chef, Will would just run for mayor, we'll have a complete trifecta of a shit show.”

They highlight the traditional power struggles typical in restaurant kitchens and predict that similar dynamics will unfold on the yacht, especially with Anthony’s arrogance and Zarina’s authoritative management style.

Guest Profiles and Onboarding Chaos [36:37 - 54:00]

Ben and Ronnie satirize the guest introduction segments, mocking the clichéd and sometimes absurd bios presented in a "Blind Date" style.

• Ronnie [36:37]: “That was my reaction, too. I was like, so you went.”
• Ben [43:38]: “He must be used to working on, like, a giant boat where he's… there are a lot of sous chefs and people to clean and stuff like that.”

They laugh about the over-the-top guest profiles, the unrealistic or irrelevant personal details, and the initial chaos during charter preparations. The hosts critique the lack of proper maintenance and the messy condition of the yacht, which adds to the episode’s tension.

Kitchen Mayhem and Service Struggles [56:12 - 85:33]

A significant portion of the podcast focuses on the tumultuous kitchen scene where Anthony struggles to manage multiple tasks amidst poor communication and organizational issues.

• Ben [60:35]: “Why does this happen every season? Why is it that... just left in a state of disarray?”
• Ronnie [64:45]: “What the... No, I'm not doing my laundry.”

They highlight the unsanitary conditions in the kitchen, featuring weevils and maggots, and criticize Anthony’s incompetence and Zarina’s misplaced trust. The hosts predict that these issues will escalate, leading to heightened conflicts and drama throughout the season.

Communication Breakdown and Delegation Issues [85:32 - 90:10]

Ben and Ronnie conclude their analysis by discussing the lack of effective communication and delegation aboard the yacht. They emphasize Zarina’s reluctance to utilize Anthony’s skills fully, which only serves to heighten tensions.

• Ben [85:33]: “It's a shit show. It's going to be a fun one.”
• Ronnie [90:10]: “No, that's the point of this show, really. You never know what's gonna happen on Small Town Murder.”

They express anticipation for the rest of the season, confident that the initial setup promises ample drama and character development.

Notable Quotes

• Ben [04:24]: “This episode really... stressed me out.”
• Ronnie [05:02]: “Elevators get better.”
• Ben [14:32]: “It's gonna be a shit show between the two of them.”
• Ronnie [36:37]: “That was my reaction, too. I was like, so you went.”
• Ben [60:35]: “Why does this happen every season? Why is it that... just left in a state of disarray?”
• Ronnie [85:32]: “It's a shit show. It's going to be a fun one.”

Conclusion and Season Predictions

Ben and Ronnie wrap up the episode by expressing their excitement for the upcoming season of "Below Deck Down Under." They reiterate their anticipation for the unfolding drama and character interactions, assuring listeners that "this is going to be a fun one."

• Ben [85:33]: “Blow deck down under is always... Looking forward to the season.”
• Ronnie [85:40]: “It's a shit show. It's going to be a fun one.”

Overall Impression

"Watch What Crappens" offers a lively and entertaining critique of the "Below Deck Down Under" premiere. Ben Mandelker and Ronnie Karam's chemistry and sharp wit provide insightful commentary while keeping listeners thoroughly entertained. Their ability to blend humor with critical analysis makes this episode a must-listen for fans of the show and reality TV enthusiasts alike.

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End of Summary

This structured and detailed summary captures all key points, discussions, insights, and conclusions from the podcast episode, providing value to both existing listeners and newcomers unfamiliar with the content.

Transcript

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[Ben Mandelker]

Watch what happens over little creature. Who cares what happens when there's so much that crapping.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, hello and welcome to Watch what Crappens, the podcast for all the crap we love to talk about on Yo Brav. I'm Ronnie. That's Ben over there. Hello, Ben.

[Ben Mandelker]

Hi. How's it going?

[Ronnie Karam]

Good. I mean, I've been given a gift. A whole new boatload of dum dums to make fun of on the Internet. Oh, thank you, Lord. Like Mana dropping from heaven. Welcome to the first Below Deck down under season three recap is what I meant to say. We're glad to be here. Below Deck. Hi. Welcome to the show. Okay, we just did the Golden Crappie Awards in New York City. They are available on streaming until about February 14th, so go get your tickets. Okay. Also, we're going to be in Salt Lake City and Denver this week. In Salt Lake City, we're going to be doing Salt Lake City and in Denver, we're going to be doing Southern Charms. So come see us and go to watch what? Crappens.com for all of our dates. We've got, God, 15 more dates coming up, I think, this year. So go check them out and get your tickets so we can meet you in your town. Okay. Also, we're doing Traders recaps this year, and they are on Patreon. We also have videos on Patreon. If you prefer video recaps. Hi. That's where you can see us right now. And if you don't want to pay for Patreon, you can still get videos a week after they're released over on our YouTube channel. How about you, Ben? Anything you want to say?

[Ben Mandelker]

No, not much. Just, you know, I'm excited for this. This was such a shit show of an opening of a first episode on this. This giant, giant boat. I mean, we haven't had Below Deck down under on our. On our TV for over a year, so it's nice to have it back. But, wow, I was stressed out during this episode.

[Ronnie Karam]

Was it the stairs?

[Ben Mandelker]

It was the stairs. It was the stairs. And it was also that elevator. As soon as they showed that elevator, I was like, this elevator is going to break this season. I just didn't expect it to happen the first episode.

[Ronnie Karam]

Oh, yeah. I've known people with elevators in their homes, and they're just a nightmare. I don't know how anybody has an elevator. That shit breaks. That shit breaks. Okay. You remember when we were in that town and there was that lady, Sherry Buns? That was her pictures and all the elevators, and they were like, the elevator commissioner, Sherry Berry. We were making fun of it. Well, now I see why I need an elevator commissioner. What A pain in the ass. Elevators get better.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. Honestly. And also, like, how do you design this enormous yacht that's like, four stories high and you put the galley all the way in the basement, but, like, the dining room is on the roof. How do you not just, like, incorporate a service elevator? Like, what. What is the thinking here? This. Watching some of the things they had to do with those staircases. This episode really. It really, really stressed me out. And it's like, we have a whole season ahead of us with that staircase.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, there's a lot of staircase drama that's gonna be happening. Staircases suck. I just think we're in the future now. We need better things. Like, we need better ways to get upstairs, preferably being pulled up them somehow. And we need better elevators. Also this. And why are we still plugging things in everywhere? Like plugging all your phones, all your everything in. I just hate cords. Okay. Figure out a way that we don't need to do that anymore. Electricity. And also, they designed this boat without outdoor passageways. Like, there's no decks that go around the boat. I mean, who designed this?

[Ben Mandelker]

I know. I think there was one deck that went around because I saw them outside. I think, like, a lower deck went around, but I think an upper deck. I'm not sure. They said there was no nothing going around. Either way, I think this is a poorly designed boat. It looked really nice at first because it was so big, but it looks very difficult. And I'm like, is the air conditioning not working? Because I know it's hot and humid outside, and actually that's also adding to the stress, the fact that they're all sweating guests. Captain crew. They're all sweating all the time. But, like, why are they sweating so much indoors? Is it oppressive inside?

[Ronnie Karam]

I think so. And plus the stairs.

[Ben Mandelker]

Stairs got the. Exactly. Stairs and humidity.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

And then the whole thing with the sous chef. I mean, I love that we have a sous chef this season, but I am stressed out about that. That galley. That galley.

[Ronnie Karam]

He's a little head, too, you know? Although he's not completely wrong either.

[Ben Mandelker]

I'm about to say attitude.

[Ronnie Karam]

His attitude is not great.

[Ben Mandelker]

He's a shithead. But he also needs to be used.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yes.

[Ben Mandelker]

And weevils. And weevils. Weevils and maggots. It's just all stressful.

[Ronnie Karam]

Weevils and maggots. Oh, my God. Yeah, it's a. It's a pretty crazy one to start. Now, all the ads leading up to this have been, Captain Jason coming out of the water in a Wet shirt and, like, how sexy Captain Jason is and stuff. You know, I think the guy's sexy, but give the man a break, you know? Yeah. Keep your hands off the merchandise, ladies.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, seriously. So, yeah, why don't we just dive into this. To this. This madness that's happening here on this boat, which is that we start out and we see a big thing that says Seychelles. So we're in the Seychelles, kind of. Kind of stretching the idea of being down under quite a bit in that we're no longer in Australia and we're in the Indian Ocean and we're like, up by Africa. But that's okay. We are in the southern hemisphere. So now you know.

[Ronnie Karam]

I don't know anything about geography. Okay. So I was like, Africa, Indian Ocean. Wait a minute.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

I barely know the valley where I live, so I can't really. I'm like below deck.

[Ben Mandelker]

The valley.

[Ronnie Karam]

Like, seriously. I mean, I. So I don't know that I should be expected to know any of this stuff, but even I was like, wait a second. I don't think any of this is true. I feel lied to.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. So we see like a preview of the season and everything, which is all exciting and stuff. And Dr. Not Dr. Jason, Captain Jason does his whole thing of like a spiel about, like, you know, you know, luxury yachting in the Seychelles is where the Seychelles are. It's humid, so shells by the Seychelles.

[Ronnie Karam]

Mike sa. What is that? I'm like, what is that rhyme?

[Ben Mandelker]

She sells se. She sells seashells by the seashore. I think there's more to it. I just remember learning it from Snoopy because, like, Sally. Sally's like one of them. One of the. I had a book when I was a kid and Sally set a seashell stand by the seashore. And it was like, Sally sells seashells. She's seashells by the seashore. And I was like, how enterprising.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, I love Sally. Sally's like, let's just get some free shit and get some money for it. That's my kind of girl.

[Ben Mandelker]

Shay Shales.

[Ronnie Karam]

Shay Shales. Shay Shales. By the Shay shoal. It's a tongue twister. It's often used to practice pronunciation. There you go. Hey, you know what doesn't need a whole lot of work? The Internet. Thank you, Internet. Thank you for being better than stairs and elevators and non rapid decks and cords and electric cords.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, all of those things. Thanks for being significantly better by about than so many things in our lives. So Zarina shows up and she's like, wow, she's huge. Oh, I first to arrive. So she shows up first, and basically, Jason has fish. Oh, yeah, he has fish. He has pet fish, too. He didn't name them right. They were just there, I think.

[Ronnie Karam]

Like, if you have fish on land, that's cute. You know, it's like, look, I'm appreciating the ocean, but when you have fish on a boat, that's just. That's like fish trafficking. Like, you're holding those things prisoner. That's not cool, man. You're like, look at this whole world. You don't get to swim in because I've captured you.

[Ben Mandelker]

But it's like a prison. Like, it's like if we went to jail and someone said, okay, you're going to jail, and we're building the jail right in your backyard, and you just have to sit and, like, look at your life that you used to have, and you just. But you can't. You can see it, but you can't touch it.

[Ronnie Karam]

It's like that time I locked myself in the bathroom at my house.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yes.

[Ronnie Karam]

And I had to climb out the window into another person's apartment. You know, I could have been killed. If that was in Texas.

[Ben Mandelker]

That was. Yes. And that is exactly what it feels like to be a fish on a yacht, which is just locked in the bathroom.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. You're just stuck there with your poop. And also, that tank didn't look very clean. I think he's probably watching those YouTube videos that I watched a long time ago where there was a really hot guy and he's like, oh, I'm into old natural tanks. And I'm like, oh, my God, I love it. And, like, plantscapes and whatever you call those. And I got really into it until I killed all the fish when I changed the water. And then I was traumatized. But anyway, I'm wondering if Captain Jason has found this hot guy and he's like, well, there's a handsome lad. Maybe I'll try my hand at natural seascapes in a bowl. But whatever, it's not working. Okay, that's some green ass water. Let those fish out.

[Ben Mandelker]

Let them free. And by the way, this is the blow deck where they show the most underwater footage. Like, they definitely. They're like, we are going to pay for some good stock footage. Because it's like every other scene, they just, like, interject some random fish. There was one point in the episode where, like, two people were talking and just, like, a giant ray was below them. They just, like, split the screen. And below it's just a big, like, manta ray or stingray just floating along, you know?

[Ronnie Karam]

And I love Ray from Real Housewives of Potomac. He's like, Bruce trying to find Miami.

[Ben Mandelker]

Going to the golf course.

[Ronnie Karam]

The big star of the show, obviously. You know what I'm going to say. I'm sure the turtle. I mean, that turtle was like, look, I'm just a turtle. But by the end, he was like, you morons. You know, it was like he passed by with, like, a little cigarette. Like, everyone here stupid. Do I have to do everything myself?

[Ben Mandelker]

I can't believe the turtle. The turtle's just dismayed by the staircase where I live. You just swim up.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. You want to complain about an elevator? Look at these things that I'm stuck with. It's like going all slowly.

[Ben Mandelker]

Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that you have to go up four staircases. How about. How about being endangered?

[Ronnie Karam]

Okay, what are you complaining about? You're covered in stone. No one can get you.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, so. So anyway, so Tsarina's like, holy guacamole, there's a piano. Oh, my God. It's like a cruise ship. An elevator. Oh, I'm gonna take this. A literal elevator. It looks like it's three floors. Wow. Jason. And so she, like, runs up and gives him a hug, and they're, like, reunited and everything.

[Ronnie Karam]

And he gives her a hug, too, but it's not like an Asia hug. He's like, well, hello, employee. Where? With Asha. It's like, oh, my God, I can't wait for you to put in my contacts. Let's, you know, do the. Do the koala hug or whatever. It's not that kind of thing. It's just more of like, why are you hugging me so tight? You know, Which I felt kind of bad for her. She deserves a bigger hug. But you got to watch out with crazy people.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, you really do. Don't want to lead them on. So they go down to. So she knows she's like, fine. Finds out that, you know, the galley is downstairs and that the chief stew is someone named Laura, and that, like, Jason says that Laura's really gonna bring her a game. And Tsarina is excited. She's like, I've worked with her before, and she's fantastic. I really think you are going to be a great match. So at first, I was like, why do they not have Asha on this boat? You know, Asha is from New Zealand. She sort of matches the whole down under thing, and she's, like, a fan favorite. Why did they take her off this. But later on, when we meet Laura and we see, like, her relationship with Tsarina, I was like, o, oh, I get it. Now I see why they put a different stew on.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, I think they moved Asia to the big leagues. You know, she's on main, below deck, the biggest ratings getter. But I agree. I think she should be on this one, too, because I don't know. She should be. Maybe she should just be on all of them. But when she said this whole thing of, oh, my God, you're gonna love her. We've worked together, and that means in Housewives world, she is bringing this cast member on. She recommended this cast member, and now this cast member is going to betray her ass in the middle of the season, and she's gonna cry about it, and they're gonna have a fight that's thinly veiled of, like, I got you this show, now you're treating me like this.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, it's gonna be a shit show between the two of them. We can already tell. And then also, the big twist this season is that there is a sous chef, which I love this as an idea because we've never really examined tension between a chef and a sous chef. And that's just this very first episode, we see, like, how fertile this ground is for drama.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. Because one of the most dramatic areas in a restaurant is the kitchen. And it's all those relationships, you know, because the kitchen, the chef is generally abusive, you know, and then we have to watch how everybody deals with that abuse. You know, some people become like, Stockholm syndrome, where they're like, oh, my God, the chef's amazing. And some people secretly want to murder the chef or dream about having his job. And so we never get to see that, really, on this show. So, yeah, I agree. It's great. And they got a really arrogant, young, semi hot person who just knows that he should be the. Or he thinks in his mind that he should be the chef. And now he's having to deal with Zarina instead. And. Oh, it's gonna be good.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. And I always wonder, like, what sort of. You know, there's so much sexism in the kitchen, in restaurants. So I always. I also. There's also that dynamic play that's, like. It's not really, you know, it's. It's not like something that is, like, a main issue, but, like, I have to wonder if that is something that's, like, bubbling under the surface with him too, like, oh, sure.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, there's, you know, there's sexism in the Kitchen. But then there' also sexism on boats. I mean, Jesus Christ, just add government in there and you've got, like, the trifecta. I mean, if that sous chef, Will would just run for mayor, we'll have a complete trifecta of a shit show.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, 100%. So. And Zarina's like, well, to be honest, as long as he can clean and carry heavy stuff and, like, hold me when I cry, I think that's all I'll need. I was like, oh, that's not good. Yeah, that's not good.

[Ronnie Karam]

When you're. When you're looking at your sous chef as your errand boy, you're going to be in fucking trouble because it's not the. Is not the bar. That's not their job.

[Ben Mandelker]

Exactly.

[Ronnie Karam]

Do all your dishes.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. The other thing they're doing this season is that as people come onto the boat, they're kind of giving them. It's like. It's like the beginning of, like, Blind Date or, like, one of those dating shows from the 2000s where, like, it will see their picture and then it'll freeze and we'll get vital stats so we see, like, where they're from, how old they are, and then, like, what their experience is and then, like, a fun fact. So next we have Lara, and she's from Cornwall, UK, and she's 36 years old. And she's six years as chief Stew. And her mom named her after a horse.

[Ronnie Karam]

And I also like that some bitchy queen added in the temperature when she arrives because it's like, you're gonna slow. They're like, we promise you, we've picked a place that's gonna slowly make these people go crazy. So here's the temperature when she arrives. It's 88 degrees and the humidity is 77. Watch out, Laura's about to blow.

[Ben Mandelker]

Are you talking about the horse?

[Ronnie Karam]

Who says that? Her mom. Just. If that's even a fact, don't say it. My mom named me after a horse. Jesus Christ.

[Ben Mandelker]

I'm like. Also like. Okay, I have to. I have to imagine the horse was probably named after a human. So why don't you say you named Lara after the. The og? Laura. Like Laura Flynn Boyle. Just say Lara Flynn Boyle. Anything. Don't say, like, a horse.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, go back to the beginning of. For example, my name is Rondell and my mom's name is Rhonda. So a lot of people are like, oh, no wonder you're like your mom, because she named you after her, but added an L. Well, actually, the Truth is, my grandfather was named Rondell and he wanted a boy to name Rondell, but he had a girl instead, so they just took off the L. So she got shafted because her whole name means, like, we really wanted you to be a boy. Sorry, you're not good enough. And then my mom wanted a little girl and she had a little boy.

[Ben Mandelker]

Oh, no.

[Ronnie Karam]

So she added the L back on. So it's like a whole cycle of disappointment. Your birth.

[Ben Mandelker]

No, that's so. That's so multi layered. I had no idea about the trauma embedded in your name, Ronnie.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, I have a very traumatic name now.

[Ben Mandelker]

Now here's the thing. I would say, like, okay, so&so is named after a horse. If their name was like, Seabiscuit, it's like, oh, and now here comes our chief, Stew Seabiscuit, and they say she named after horse. I'm like, okay, yeah, like, okay, I get it. Here comes Hanky, you know, or like, here, Here comes diamonds.

[Ronnie Karam]

But like, say, Hanky's the swan. Leave Hank.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, that would be. Hanky was named after a swan. I would be okay with that. But, like, if the name is already like a human name, do, like, why is that? Like, why is the horse part of it? The essential part? I don't understand that.

[Ronnie Karam]

And who named a horse Lara? What a weird name for a horse. Do horses not get cute names? They do, right? Because we've seen horse racing, like you said Sea biscuit. And they're always like Kleenex in your memaw's purse.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, yeah. Actually, horses have ridiculous names. Yeah, yeah. I don't know why they named who named their horse Lara. Because every, anytime you go to, like, a horse race, it's always like, peanut butter chocolate cake is racing now. It's coming in the first peanut butter chocolate cake. Oh, and here comes stapler.

[Ronnie Karam]

Stapler.

[Ben Mandelker]

And then. Oh, my God. Vagina exposed. Vagina exposed. Coming around the bed. And here comes Laura.

[Ronnie Karam]

Little Debbie's bad for your stomach coming around the bend. Coming around the bend.

[Ben Mandelker]

Leave the last hats off for savings is now coming into third place.

[Ronnie Karam]

They were from behind.

[Ben Mandelker]

And here comes Leave the last hats off for savings.

[Ronnie Karam]

1-800-Cards-For kids. Coming around the corner there. Frosty bush falling behind. Warm up, Frosty. Warm up that bush.

[Ben Mandelker]

I feel bad for the horse that I named Exposed vagina. That's something.

[Ronnie Karam]

Exposed vagina. Horses do, in fact, have exposed, you know, body parts, and they're enormous, you know, gigantic vagina. Gigantic exposed vagina coming around. Okay, it's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappens commercial. Elevating my style used to mean breaking the bank. But with Quints I get high end versatile pieces at prices I can actually afford. Now I can upgrade my style by snagging luxury essentials that sync with my my vibe and my wallet.

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I love that I have a sweet, sweet goldenrod light jacket that I got from Quint's. I got a bracelet and you know we're about to go on tour and so I'm gonna need to get some cool looks for when we hit that stage. And guess what? I'm gonna go to Quint's to do it.

[Ronnie Karam]

Indulge in affordable luxury. Go to quints.com crappens for free shipping on your order and 365 days returns. That's quints.com q U-I-N c e.com Krappins to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com Crabbins hey y'all, it's your girl, Keke Palmer.

[Keke Palmer]

And let me tell you, we're kicking off this new year with a whole new mindset. You know how everyone's all about New Year, new me. Well on baby. This is Keke Palmer. We're taking it to a whole other level. We're talking New Year, new perspectives and honey, it's gonna change your life. I sat down with astrology queen Chani Nicholas, y'all, if you want to understand yourself better this year than this episode is it. And then there's my chat with the incredible Da Vinci where nothing was off the table. If you're looking to level up your mindset this year, his words are definitely going to hit different. If you're ready for that new year new mindset energy you've got to tune into. Baby this is Keke Palmer. Catch it on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. And for the full experience, head to my YouTube channel. If you're looking for more podcasts to help you tend to your well being, check out New Year New Mindset on the Wondery App. Let's make this year our best one yet, baby.

[Ronnie Karam]

Okay, so Serena is talking while we see this, you know, while we see Lara come on board, and Serena's like, oh, my God. Yeah, I can't wait to put this little sue to work. But, you know, thank God he's British, because British humor is dark. It's sarcastic, it's mean as fuck. This could be really awesome. There's no boundaries in British humor. I hope you're ready for that to come bite you in the ass, because he can use the same thing, and you've already said it in your monologue. He can be like, I wasn't disrespecting you. It was British humor, darling.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, that's like. I feel like British humor was made solely so that way British people can just always refer to it when they've offended someone. What? What are you talking about? It's British humor, darling. Pick up your tears.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, The Lisa Vanderpump of it all. So Lara sees her. Sees the stairs, and she's like, fuck this. She's like, oh, my God, this is gonna be an aunt, man. And so she goes to meet Jason and stuff. And I like that she wasn't overly friendly. I really like that this chick is just icy up front.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

She's like, listen, I've been on enough boats to know you're all gonna hate me, okay? And I already hate you. I don't care how many ads you've done without your shirt on. All right, you piece of. Is that Fisher prisoner? Clean that fish tank.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. I think that we both really enjoy an icy chief stew. Like, that's, like, really exciting for us. And she is very icy. She seems like she has no emotions. In fact, later on, when she cried, I was actually upset that she cried because I was like, no, I want you to be so icy. You just don't even feel anything. Don't break down. Just, like, be icy. But so far, so good on the Lara front.

[Ronnie Karam]

Oh, she'll be broken. Like they broke Seabiscuit soon. Don't you worry. They'll get her. This is below deck. No one leaves here crying. You know what I mean? And we've had a long line recently, you know, post Kate and Hannah, we've had a long line of Stu's really trying to be liked. And so it's nice that there's someone who maybe she wants to be liked, but it's not gonna happen.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, she. It definitely won't be happening.

[Ronnie Karam]

No.

[Ben Mandelker]

I also, like, by the way, as we'll see over the course of the episode. Lara is really good about tending to fabrics. Like, there were a lot of cutaway shots of her, like, smoothing out, like, a bed spread or smoothing out, like a napkin or a tablecloth. She likes to sort of put her hands on things and just. She sort of evens it out. And it was like an attention to detail. And I love that because it's the chief stews who have that attention to detail, who are the ones that, like, really are, like, hilariously cold to their. Their underlings and, like, make their lives out.

[Ronnie Karam]

Love that.

[Ben Mandelker]

I love that so much. When the chiefs do. When. When you have, like, the. The spoiled brat stews, like, on blood exhaling last year, and you just have a chief sue who's like, I don't have time to tolerate your funny business because I've got fabrics to press down on. You know, like, it's just. It's great energy.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. So she tells us that she's been in the industry for 13 years. And she's like, growing up, my dad was an airline pilot. Unfortunately, he just wanted to be on ground because he was addicted to gambling. And so he named me after one of his horses. Laura Mora, Nickel and Dime. And, you know, it was kind of rough having a father who would run around right behind me just saying, faster, faster. You can do it faster. I was the first girl who ran into school, tripped on the stairs, and broke my teeth. I'll never forgive my father.

[Ben Mandelker]

I've always been around stewardesses. I love how made up they are and how perfect their hair was. I do take care of myself, and I like to be very neat and tidy and proper. Sounds posh. I quite like it.

[Ronnie Karam]

And you know, this is a callback to one of our favorite chief stews of all time, who didn't get the chance to live. I mean, she's still alive. She has a baby and stuff. But, I mean, on the show. That is Faye. That is Faye, who is like, ladies, what do we do as stewardesses? We wear lipstick and we curl our hair. A little hairspray never hurt anybody. Ladies.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yes. I enjoy a stu that treats the boat like a finishing school. That's very important to me.

[Ronnie Karam]

Me too. And I saw. Cause we follow Faye, you know? Cause we love Faye. And I saw her post something the other day. Cause, you know, she does have a baby, and she went back to being brunette. She's doing a lot of things I don't approve of in her real life is what I'm saying. But she did have a post of something. Like, who Wants me back on below deck already. Like, isn't it time? And I was like, I love that you're ready to just drop the baby, pull out the peroxide and get here. You know, like Alita Adams saying, I don't care how you get here, just get here if you can. Okay. I love you.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, I love that she's dropping that hint because, like, we're ready. We're ready. Like, let's. Let's insert her on one of these shows. Put her on, like, classic below deck. I actually think that, like, I mean, Fraser is nice and everything and I. I enjoy Fraser and it's nice to have, like, a gay man, as the chiefs do. But honestly, if I had to make a pick, if someone had to be swapped out for Faye, it probably would be Fraser for me at this point.

[Ronnie Karam]

Oh, yeah. I don't know. I mean, I don't know. I'm not going to make that choice. But I definitely want to see her on and I would like to get her to see her get a chance at the big leagues, you know?

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, I would.

[Ronnie Karam]

She'd.

[Ben Mandelker]

It's just that, like, I can't. I could never say no to Aisha or to Daisy. And Is there anyone else? I mean, well, this new. This new person. This one's new, so I can't say. But I'm just saying.

[Ronnie Karam]

But then, yeah, there's.

[Ben Mandelker]

So Fraser gets the short end user.

[Ronnie Karam]

No, there's a girl who. Oh, my God. She was originally from down under and now she's Toomey. Yeah, Tumi. There's Tumi. Toomey kind of fucked it up in her last episode.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, she got replaced by Aisha.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. So I wouldn't see it. Yeah. Oh, she did get replaced by Asha.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

Because, well, meaning that, like, I'm confused in my mind.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, it's all kind of like one big spectrum. But, like, Tumi was on, as chiefs do on a shit show of a season. And I love Toomey. Like, like, so it's like just to say I want it, like, to replace Fraser is not to say I don't love Fraser. I'm just saying, like, some people are just like, icons. And so, like, Tumi was on and then we had the. We had a below deck season and then we went back to below deck mad. And everyone was surprised that we went like, med classic medicine. Because, remember, they threw in the med that we suspect because they were re editing below deck sailing. So in the second med, that's where Asia was on as a chief stew and Then we just had sailing and now we're down under again.

[Ronnie Karam]

But did they even edit below deck sailing? Because Gary was still a main part of that whole season. I don't even think they re edited. I just thought they were doing the old, give, give it time. People will be less mad.

[Ben Mandelker]

Or maybe they were, like, conducting an investigation and they're like, if this investigation turns out badly, then we have to pull the entire season. But then they're okay. It's enough that we can air the season. Who knows?

[Ronnie Karam]

So Serena sees Lara and they're hugging, and she's, oh, my God, look at you. It's so wonderful to see you. And she's like, I'm hot and sweaty. It's disgusting. She goes, well, I have a sweat mustache all the time or smell. What else is new? Honestly, Serena, she's like, well, I feel.

[Ben Mandelker]

Like someone else is here, so I wonder who the person would be. Her saying, I feel like someone else is here is her way of trying to say, I better go check to see if someone else is here because I don't want to talk to you anymore.

[Ronnie Karam]

I need to smooth something down to feel a little bit better. That's my face, darling. That's my face. I know. Listen, I love an impossible challenge. Or is there a hot person here?

[Ben Mandelker]

You know, I hope they're not bad looking. Okay. Do you want a cabin with me? Do you want to do that? Remember in Antigua when you had the dancing cabin and I was, like, alone in the cabin by myself? So I thought it would be fun that this time I could be the dancing cabin and we could be dancing together. Wouldn't that be fun? And Lara's like, sure.

[Ronnie Karam]

If there was ever a face that actually was the sound of a sigh, it was that face. I mean, it was just one long. She just stared at her, but it was just one long. Great. It sounds great.

[Ben Mandelker]

If I were her, I would have said, you know what? Let me see. Let's get the entire crew on here first, and then let's reassess and see who goes where. And then I'm gonna plug myself in wherever there's like a gap. But you could see, like, in that moment, I was like, oh, these? She doesn't like Zarina. Now I know. Now I know why they didn't have Asia back. They were like, let's get the person who has beef with Zarina.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. And she's like, what? Remember last time I had the room alone and there was other fun cabin. But how about this time we're the fun Cabin. You and me, Fun cabin. And Laura's just like, oh, off. So then we meet. We on Wehan.

[Ben Mandelker]

I forget how he said his name. I feel like it was like a V sound. Like.

[Ronnie Karam]

Listen, we don't know anybody's names or accents or remember their faces for at least four episodes. So I hope people aren't coming in too picky right now. But he arrives and, I mean, it's. You know, it's a nice name because it's unique, but I feel bad for him because it's very similar to the flute, and that's rough. She was named after Horus. He's named after a flu. I mean, the flu season.

[Ben Mandelker]

Is he the Vian of the avian? I looked it up.

[Ronnie Karam]

There was the Wuhan. Remember the Wuhan virus?

[Ben Mandelker]

So he has it on two different. Whichever way you spell it, he's part. It's flu. Whichever way it looks like. Like, according to the Internet, which we have previously established is better than the staircase. Vihaan. I think it's Vihaan. V sounds like V in very. And E sounds like E. And C and H sounds like. Okay, I get it. I get it.

[Ronnie Karam]

That's nice. And he's from Paul, South Africa, which is P, A, A, R, L. And I just like to think of Pearl from 227. Mary, you better get upstairs. Lester is waiting for you to have some dinner. Mary. He's 31 years old and he's worked as a shirtless server at a bar named Beefcakes. So hot piece of ass coming through, ladies and gentlemen. Get your dollars out.

[Ben Mandelker]

And then we go back to Lara, who has this glowing review of her experience with Tsarina. She goes, well, me and Tsarina know each other from a previous boat. And I'm like, barbie. And she's weird Barbie. On my previous boat, we worked together for six months. And not everyone likes Zarina, present company included. She's definitely an acquired taste. She's like Vegemite. You either love it or you hate it. But under all the bravado and the extraness and annoyingness and ugly faceness and stupidity and like, God, get this woman out of my. Out of my space. Ness. She's a good person, I've been told. I don't know. Apparently she has a good heart. I don't know. She made broth last season. I don't. I don't know anything about it.

[Ronnie Karam]

If she's a good person, why are you calling her Vegemite? Who says that? This woman's a monster. There, I said it.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. Yeah, this is, this is someone who does not like Tsarina but doesn't want to come off like a total biatch in the beginning. So she's trying to be sort of nice. She's like, I think the audience likes Tsarina. So I don't want to be the one that doesn't like Tsarina, but I don't like Tsarina.

[Ronnie Karam]

And then Tsarina, you know, her take is I want a room with Lara because I know Lara's a cool girl, you know, I've never been cool, you know. You know, we all know I'm a bit of weirdo, you know, so we did clash heads a little bit at work, but we've always said we're much better as an off boat friendship. But we've matured. I'm sure it's going to be great. She's going to love me. Cool girl. Status incoming.

[Ben Mandelker]

Oh, God. So then they're doing some sort of like administrative stuff with the bedroom and everything. And then Via gets down there and they're like, they introduce themselves to him and he says that he's like the boson. And Lara's, you know, they're all making introductions and stuff like that.

[Ronnie Karam]

I like when Serena and Serena shows Lara their room and she's like, there's a third bed here. Isn't that exciting? And Lara's like, we could use that for shoes and bags. She's like, shoes and bags. Who's got more than one pair of each? I mean, it's ridiculous actually. You know, I actually sometimes will use my shoes bag. You know, shoelaces. Just put a little bit of lipstick in there. What more do you need in life really? Come on. Mara's just like, please die. I was like, please die.

[Ben Mandelker]

I feel like there probably is some sort of handbag that's like in the shape of a shoe. Like shoelaces. I guarantee that that's like a thing.

[Ronnie Karam]

Jennifer Tilly owns it probably. So yeah, they meet that guy. He's kind of boring. But you know what? There's a reason guys at beefcakes never talk. Okay. They're not there for their conversation, there for their butts. Right?

[Ben Mandelker]

That's right.

[Ronnie Karam]

So then we meet Adair, who is a Dex stew and she's from Beaufort, Georgia and she's 24 years old and she enjoys doing fireball shots with her 97 year old neighbor.

[Ben Mandelker]

Why does this feel like the Match Game? Why do we feel like we're meeting contestants on a game show somewhere?

[Ronnie Karam]

Because they're bringing people on that you want to throw a match at.

[Ben Mandelker]

To make you want to, like, shake your tv. So she says, coming from Georgia Bowdoin, scraping boats in the muck, I had no idea that the industry really existed until I was offered my first job. I thought I was going to get kidnapped. I mean. I mean, look. I mean, there was this amazing couple, and they said, hey, our Bosses own a $20 million yacht, and you should work with it. And I'm like, you're going to kidnap me. That's what my mom tells me. Don't talk to people like you. I really thought I was going to get kidnapped. I thought so. So of course I went with them.

[Ronnie Karam]

That was my reaction, too. I was like, so you went. I mean, who knows? Maybe it's just a creepy white van. The man had ice cream. I'm getting in. Okay, Risk it. Whoever risk it wins the biscuit. Know what I'm saying? But also, this girl's so confusing because she's like, I love boating. I've been a muck scraper, a dog, whatever. She started listing all these boat jobs, but then they kept showing her on four wheelers dressed like Lara Croft. So I was really confused.

[Ben Mandelker]

That's who the horse was named after?

[Ronnie Karam]

No, Lara Croft was also named after a horse. And then a horse was named after Laura Cross. Cross.

[Ben Mandelker]

It's just an endless cycle.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Serena's like, I need to look professional for my sous chef. I'm getting a sous chef. British humor. Can't wait. Yup. Lara's like, what? I'm looking out for my stew. Brianna. OMG. From 2016 to now, she's a model. Look at her. A model from 2016. New York Fashion Week, British Vogue. Can't wait to call her an old lady. Because really, 2016, someone's a little bit long in the two. Do you really need. Is everything going to be a horse reference with you? I mean, let it go already.

[Ben Mandelker]

Serena goes, you know what? It's going to be actually nice and relieved to have another model on board. And you can see Lara's like, please don't ruin my relationship with a. With a fashion model. I need this right now.

[Ronnie Karam]

So then we see Adair. Wait, Brianna's bio. She's from Mullins Hill, New Jersey, and she's 22 years old. Wait, she's been a model since 2016, which was. What year is it? 2025. So she was like, a teenage model? I guess.

[Ben Mandelker]

I guess that's if this was filmed in 2024, so that would be eight years ago. So, yeah, she was like, I guess at 14. She's been modeling since then.

[Ronnie Karam]

God, I'd love child labor. Yeah. But also, I mean, I started modeling way younger than that. I think I was nine when I modeled the husky line at Dillard's. So watch out, Brie. Brianna.

[Ben Mandelker]

Brianna. And then we see Anthony, the sous chef. He's on board next, and he's from London, and he's 26 years old. And here's something that's important for everyone to know. His favorite pizza is gorgonzola, prosciutto, and olives. So this guy must be so boring that they couldn't find anything better than his favorite pizza. Like, you know, you got one person modeled in British Vogue, One person worked in a gay bar. One person's named after a horse. And all we know about this guy is that his favorite pizza is gorgonzola, prosciutto, and olives.

[Ronnie Karam]

But that is a pretty weird pizza, because what it tells me is that he has no personality, and so he's struggling for identity, and he's like, oh, my God. Gorgonzola on a pizza. That's crazy. I'm gonna say that's my favorite. I mean, gorgonzola, prosciutto, and olives. All very strong flavors. Surely people will think I'm interesting.

[Ben Mandelker]

And then we have Marina, another stew, who shows up, and she is from Rio de Janeiro. She's 26, and she's trained in ballet for 10 years. Unfortunately, we have no idea what sort of pizza she enjoys, so we'll have to figure that out over the course of the season.

[Ronnie Karam]

But we do know that she was into Gorgonzola ballet, so hopefully she'll have a little romance. Coming with the sea chef. Also, I think they're setting this whole thing up like, she's really a ballet person, and then she's gonna fall down the stairs. That's my prediction. She's gonna be like, my ballet life is ruined, or, my ballet life is ruined. How could they do this to me? So Lara's impressed with Marina's experience, And then we get our little goofball. Why do I feel like I've seen him cry multiple times? It's Harry. Harry. Harry's next.

[Ben Mandelker]

Good old Harry. So everyone's happy to see Harry. And then Anthony, the sous chef, he. He comes down into the kitchen, and the first thing he says is, oh, hello. What's up? Oh, wow. It's a bit commercial. It's a bit of a mess in here. Like, okay, all right. I know it's not Zarina's fault. But, like, let's not, like, say it in a way like, it is her fault.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. And how about you talk less with your mouth and more with your mop?

[Ben Mandelker]

Okay.

[Ronnie Karam]

Cause this is your workspace, so if you find it dirty, start cleaning. Okay, Anthony. And he's telling us, oh, well, I've done my junior year's period and I'm ready to step it up. I was lucky enough to work with Michelin star chef for my last restaurant. I just learned so. Or my last yacht. I just learned so much. He was so talented, so passionate. Had a penis. And we did everything together. And I feel like I'm on the periphery of becoming the head chef chef. All I need to do is take out one big boss. Weird Barbie it is.

[Ben Mandelker]

So then Jason's talking to Harry and he's like, what have you been up to? And Harry's like, well, I've been teaching my scuba diving. Got my dive instructor, got my yacht master. Just got to the miles now and go. Go back and do offshore and then officer watch, then draw big boats. And basically he says he just wants to, you know, he really wants to be lead deckhand or Bose in the season and work his way up to being a captain someday.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. And so we get a stew meeting in the main salon, and then the deck team, wherever they are, they're closed off deck. And then we get Johnny, the deckhand hanging out with Adair. And his bio says that he's from Athens, Greece, and he's 24 years old and he lives by the motto, a clear sky fears no thunderstorm.

[Ben Mandelker]

That makes no sense.

[Ronnie Karam]

That's stupid. Like, that's literally stupid. Why would this guy fear a thunderstorm anyway? It's like someone moving in for a little while. You know who fears thunderstorms? The people on the ground. Okay. Who cares what the sky thinks about it?

[Ben Mandelker]

The clear sky is just like, okay, you want to come over here? I'll go over there. Like, the clear sky. Yeah, the clear sky doesn't fear it. But the clear sky doesn't have anything to fear. The clear sky won't be impacted whatsoever.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. So this guy is like a dumb person who's trying to seem smart. And I don't know, we're going to get emails. Like, that's like a famous saying from Plato. I don't care. Okay. That was a different time. We've learned more. We have electrical cords now and elevators, so tell Plato to suck it. But also, Johnny's the one that we've seen in the previews having Anger fits and having. Having like a severe temper tantrum and problem. So I think he gets fired soon. So we already know he's angry.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. He's also really annoying. So he introduces himself and he introduces himself to Harry. And Harry's, oh, all right, what's your position? And he's like, lead deckhand. And he's like, oh, really? He's like, yeah, what's yours? And they just like, say, oh, I'm just a regular deckhand, whatever suit. They just sort of chit chat, whatever.

[Ronnie Karam]

And we know on the show they don't hire lead deckhands. You don't get to just skip that. Like, I get to fake it till you make it, but damn.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, it's wild because I was like, in my mind, I was like, oh, they're changing things up. We've got a sous chef this season and now we're going to start with a lead deckhand. That's cool. So I had no idea he was just lying at this point.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. And then they're talking to Adair now, and she's like, I've been in yacht a little over a year. Muck racking my right. And Harry's saying four or five years. And we haunt. Von Vian is like, you know, listen, I've been on catamarans, monohulls, motor yachts, super yachts, mega yachts, dicks, a lot of dicks. I used to work at a place called Beefcakes. You know, it was just a little, little trip, but other ways. Now I'm a captain of a catamaran.

[Ben Mandelker]

And then Johnny, of course, he's like threatened by him. And we know that Johnny is going to be challenging Vyon over everything. And he's like, I'm super competitive with pretty much anything I do. So I grew up. I grew up grappling Brazilian jiu jitsu, boxing, kickboxing. I just grind to be a better than you. And one day I'll definitely be better than everyone. I'm like, well, that's great. Well, maybe you should do that as a career instead of being a quote unquote lead deckhand.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

What are you doing?

[Ronnie Karam]

No one wants to hang out with you, okay? You can be the best at everything, but people have to want to work with you, okay? And nobody is going to want to work with you, you arrogant little far.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, yeah, you say it. You say it. I was backing you up. I was backing up. I was. I was praising commercials. Here comes one right now.

[Keke Palmer]

UFO lands in Suffolk. And that's official. Said the News of the world. But what really happened across two nights.

[Ronnie Karam]

In December 1980 when U.

[Keke Palmer]

S servicemen saw mysterious lights in the forest near our RAF Woodbridge and claimed to have had a close encounter with an actual craft?

[Ben Mandelker]

Encounters, a new podcast available exclusively on Wondery plus, takes a deep dive into one of the most famous and still unresolved UFO encounters to ever take place.

[Ronnie Karam]

In the UK Featuring shocking testimony from first hand witnesses. Hosts, journalist, podcaster and UFO researcher Andy McVillan.

[Ben Mandelker]

That's me.

[Ronnie Karam]

And producer El Salvador Scott take us back to the nights in question and.

[Ben Mandelker]

Examine all of the evidence and conflicting.

[Ronnie Karam]

Theories about what was encountered in the middle of a Snowy Suffolk Forest 40 years ago.

[Ben Mandelker]

Are we alone?

[Keke Palmer]

Encounters is a podcast which is going.

[Ben Mandelker]

To find out Listen to Encounters exclusively.

[Keke Palmer]

In ad free on Wondry plus.

[Ben Mandelker]

Join Wondry plus in the Wonder app.

[Keke Palmer]

Or in Apple podcasts. Welcome to the offensive line, you guys. On this podcast we're gonna make some picks, talk some, and hopefully make you some money in the process. Success. I'm your host, Annie Hagar. So here's how this show's gonna work, okay? We're gonna run through the weekly slate of NFL and college football matchups, breaking them down into very serious categories like no offense, no offense, Travis Kelce, but you gotta step up your game. If Pat Mahomes is saying the Chiefs need to have more fun this year. We're also handing out a series of awards and making picks for the top storylines surrounding the world of football. Awards like the he must have a point award for the wide receiver that's most justifiably bitter. Is it Brandon Aiyuk T. Higgins or Devontae Adams? Plus, on Thursdays we're doing an exclusive bonus episode on Wondery where I share my fantasy football picks. Ahead of Thursday Night football and the weekend's matchups, your fantasy league is as good as locked in. Follow the offensive line on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can access bonus episodes and listen ad free right right now by joining Wondery plus.

[Ronnie Karam]

So now they're looking for cabins and they're meeting the interior and everyone's like, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi. And Anthony the Sue meets Jason. He's like, great to have you on board. Hopefully you can help put out some great food. I do have new fish in my prison tank and I would appreciate you feeding them every once in a while. And Serena goes, yeah, and now we've got a dishwasher. Just look at him. And Anthony goes, as if. But he's already like, I'm gonna kill you.

[Ben Mandelker]

He does not like that joke. So much so that he's gonna resurrect some clueless banter.

[Ronnie Karam]

So I don't think it's a joke either. She did not yet be joking.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, it turns out that it's not a joke. At first I thought it was, and then turns out, oh no, she's serious about this. So then she's like, all right, so how long have you been chefing? He goes, so I probably worked, probably from 17, I'd say. And I've, I, I've been in yachting for four years now. She goes, okay, and how many boats have you been on? He's like, four boats. And she's like, oh, four boats. I've only got two down here on your cv. He's like, yeah, needs updating. And she goes, sneaky little gypsies. So what are your actual training and background? Are you self taught? And she's you know, it's like, it's like, I think standard questioning to try to understand your Sue. But he does not like this whatsoever. He is definitely a bit of a diva. Acting like he is above having his work experience questioned.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, because she's, you know, and she's going in and she's, I think in my memory she's like sitting crisscross applesauce on top of a counter. Just like kind of a pen in her mouth, like, all right, let's get this started. You know, she's like, what are your weaknesses? What are your strengths? And he's like, weaknesses? I mean, that's really a tough question on the spot. She goes, well, but that's why we do it, right? Weaknesses, what are they? And so your whole job is on the spot, so go ahead. And he's, well, I mean, describing weaknesses. I'm not really, I don't like that. She goes, okay, then how about your strengths? Let's describe your strengths. Have you ever fit a lipstick into a shoe and taken it out to a club? That's one of my strengths. You go, now it's easy, see?

[Ben Mandelker]

He's like, well, strengths. I'd say I'm pretty well rounded at everything, I'd say. So basically he thinks that he's like an amazing chef who, he doesn't have any weaknesses. So she's like, no weaknesses. He goes, can't really think of too many. I'm like, well, obviously there are some. Cause you are still just a sous and you've clearly got things to learn. And so she goes, well, my weaknesses list is bigger than My strengths list. He goes, well, it's just a hard one for me to answer.

[Ronnie Karam]

And she's like, really? And he says, well, what's with the interview process here? And she's like, oh, interview? I don't know anything about you. I want to know who I'm working with. And, you know, I want to go through. Know your weaknesses, your strengths, stuff like that. How hard do you hug? Do you carry tissues on you in case I'm crying? You know, those are important things to know. And he's like, well. Well, I mean, I guess we'll soon find out. Oh, hell no. So she does say. She's like, I don't do egos, and if it ever happens, it's like, get out. You know what I'm saying? And I want you to understand I'm not interrogating you, all right? I'm just trying to figure out how to work together. Okay, so here's what you're gonna do. Clean, clean, clean. And then when you make crew food, I would like you to make salads, fresh fish, and then, you know, for breakfast, just something easy, grab and go. Okay. Now, would you like to maybe do guest food at some point? He's like, 100%. Because normally when I'm with, you know, the chefs that treat me with respect, I do. I work with them, you know, not for them, basically. And she's like, oh, how fun. How fun for you. All right, welcome to my boat.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. Because she's really nice at first, but when he starts kind of giving a lot of attitude, we see the Tsarina that we are more familiar with, which is that she's like, oh, it's another fucking man trying to, like, tell me how to do my job. Right? Like, that was, like, her vibe last season. Bizarina was bubbly and fun last season, too, but a lot of times she was just exasperated by the incompetence around her. And so, like, it started to come out again, and you could see she was like, oh, I'm trying to be fun Tsarina this season, and you're dragging me back into angry Zarina right now. Come on, it's only the first episode.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, and he's just, like, trying to put it out there. I like that. She was like, so is your goal to eventually, like, help me with guest food? And then he's just like, well, I normally work hand in hand with the chef. It's like, nope. Sorry. Earn it. Okay. Earn it, sir. So he tells us, I didn't fly here for another interview. I haven't Been interrogated like this since I was in secondary school by my headmaster. Okay. He's got a dark past because, first of all, his CV doesn't match what he's saying. And then when he's asked any kind of weaknesses, he can't answer. I don't believe you, sir. I don't believe you. Yeah, I think he's a fucking liar here.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, I think so. And so, and also, like, one thing that he clearly does not understand is chain of command. So, like, yes, he wants to work on guest food, and yes, things have been different on different boats, but, like, she's still his boss and he's already pushing back on that, so that's probably his biggest weakness. So she says, I'm not asking for your mother's. Your Social Security number and your mother's maiden name. This is a huge red flag. If Anthony plays his cards right with me, I'm more than happy that by the end of the season he can make some guest food. But as a head chef, I'm not going to trust any random person I've just met to cook guest food. Prove yourself to me and your skill then. Once trust is earned, of course, let's go for it. Which does make me question, by the way, what is the best way to bring on. If you're given a sous chef, do you make them do grunt work for a bit and then slowly find out what their skills are, or do you just sort of, like, immune to help you out?

[Ronnie Karam]

Normally a sous chef does your chopping. Like, if you're, you know, you teach them the cuts that you want and you show him how to do the prep work. Usually a sous chef is doing your prep work, and then you teach them to do everything, and eventually they know how to do everything. And you get to kind of oversee while they do a lot of the stuff, right? If you're. If you need a night off or whatever. But usually they are prepping and cooking with you. They're not your dish person. That's a separate person in this situation, there is no dish person, so I can see why she would need that. But, you know, he's right to be annoying if he's only gonna be doing dishes and stuff this whole time. But she is also giving him an out. And he's not an out, but she's giving him, like, do you wanna eventually do this? And, like, how can I help you move up in the world? And he's being a huge asshole to her. So then we go to Jason and he has the crew meeting and he's like, welcome to Katina. And he introduces the first officer and engineers who we don't even see. They don't even give him a shot this time.

[Ben Mandelker]

No, they do.

[Ronnie Karam]

Usually we. They do.

[Ben Mandelker]

We got. Yeah, they got a shot. And it was funny because the one. The guy in the middle, like, that's cold. It was for, like, half a second. And I definitely went back and paused because it's just like. Again, it looks like three Mafiosi. And the guy in the middle, his eyes are bulging out, and you can see he's like, oh, I'm not supposed to be here. I. I'm a vending vending machine repair man. I don't know how I end up on this boat. And now I'm stuck here. Like, he looks like he is so out of his league.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, Jason does his whole spiel of like, I like to look at this. Like, we have one big family environment. We're brothers. We're sisters. Oh, shut up. I hate that we're brothers. You know what I used to do to my sister? I used to pull out her eyelashes. Then I would put her. I had this tool, this toy box that was shaped like a football, and I would put her in it, and then I would roll it down the stairs. Okay? I do not want anybody to treat me like I treated my sister. I was a monster, you know?

[Ben Mandelker]

Did you really do those things to Carly?

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. I was young. I didn't know the difference.

[Ben Mandelker]

The pulling out the eyelashes is really intense.

[Ronnie Karam]

I was a monster.

[Ben Mandelker]

I don't even know how that. How does that happen? You just pinned her down or something like that?

[Ronnie Karam]

I guess. I don't remember doing it. These are just stories my parents tell. Or, like, when my mom would be feeding my sister, probably wine. Like, let's face it, I would just stand in front of her and then whip out my wiener and pee all over the car carpet. Like, I was a very, very awful child. So I just. I don't know. We didn't all have the same, you know, growing up experience, so I. I suggest that we stop saying, let's be like a family. You know what I mean? No one wants a wine bottle thrown at their head on Christmas Eve.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, you know, as the old saying goes, if you've got time to pee, you got time to clean. So, you know, know you learned it from an early age.

[Ronnie Karam]

So respect each other. I mean, look, I do everything. I run plates, I strip Mr. Beefcakes. You'll see me do crew messes. You'll probably be crew messes. You'll see me handling my own laundry, and I expect you to do that as well. All right? And they're all just looking at him like, what the. No, I'm not doing my laundry.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, they do not want to do that. So first charter starts tomorrow, and Jason starts talking to us about this massive boat, and he's like, cortina is a great boat. It's a big. It's got a big bow at 60 meters, which means more work. The galleys are downstairs, so we have three levels to get the food from the galley all the way to the sun deck. And there's no external walkways, so all the crew. Deck have to. All the crew have to actually walk through the main salon to get out. And it's a lot of responsibility on every department to work together to make sure this is going to happen. Like, why. Why do they. Why are they making the crew again? It's like, why do they design it this way? Making the crew walk through this, the. The space where the guests are gonna be relaxing. It just doesn't. I hate this boat already.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, it's not well designed. I don't think so. Then the boatswain's like, all right, you know, now we just need to get the boat clean. That's the first thing we need to do. And Johnny's like, for people here, I think it's too much. Do you want to split? Cause I can go start on Ball. And he's like, okay, well, there's not gonna be any guests on right now. I don't think we need to focus on that. He's like, nope, just a pop. Just be ready. Because of experience, maybe I can go forward alone so you can help with guidance. That's my thought. Excuse you, sir. You are not the boss of me, sir.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, yeah. You can get your clear skies out of our faces right now, because you, sir, are full of shit. So he is definitely of that. He is in that. That mold of the. The dei, who thinks he knows more than the bosun. So then Von tells us that part of being part of yachting industry for nine years, as a boson, he's like, I'm all about team mentality and team building. And we just. We work hard, we play hard, and for ego is just about making a name for yourself. It's not going to work for me. There's no iron team Johnny.

[Ronnie Karam]

So then we go down to. Because Johnny told us earlier that in Greek, his name is Ilonis, and that's the Greek name for Johnny. So there actually Is an I in Johnny in this case, but I get your meaning.

[Ben Mandelker]

But, yeah, you know. Yeah. So Lara, meanwhile, says. She's like, all right, everyone just want to have a chat about what I sort of expect from my team. I've been in the industry for 13 years, and my style is I just want to create a really good girl group of all Barbies. No weird Barbies. I don't want any bitchiness. Just pretty girls with pretty hair and pretty lipstick. I'm not going to assign, like, a second stew roar at the moment because there's only a few of us, but I'd like Marina to start this one on service. So she basically does her own little crew meeting. And. And. And Brianna is going to wind up, is going to be doing the grunt work for the charter.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. The laundry and the housework. So she's like, you know, I'll get you girls to jump in guest cabins and just give it a really good dust vac and a really good wipe down. And by wipe down, I mean iron everything. Okay, so then Marina. Which one's Marina?

[Ben Mandelker]

Marina is the Brazilian.

[Ronnie Karam]

Oh, the Brazilian girl.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

She's like, we're quite bossy, and we know that we don't have a lot of time under the spotlight, so I know that if I have one second to shine and be heard, I'll make it count. It's like, oh, Jesus Christ, this girl's gonna be singing with the. With the dish towels.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. Yep. So then Lara is like. She's talking about how annoying this boat is. She's saying how there's, like, four flights of stairs and then there's all this heat, and if she forgets something that she's have to go all the way back downstairs and all the way back up again. And, yes, that will happen and will happen very soon on this episode.

[Ronnie Karam]

And then Harry Tattletales, that Johnny has introduced himself to everybody as the lead deckhand, and Vyon's like, yeah, I guess we'll have to talk about that. So then Serena finds a surprise in the kitchen. It's weevils and maggots, because whoever worked there last never cleaned the food out. Don't they have a cleaning crew come in between there to say, like, hey, guys, there's a bunch of fish in the freezer or in the refrigerator?

[Ben Mandelker]

Why does this happen every season? Why is it that, like, these boats are just left in a state of disarray for such a show about. Such an industry about cleaning up after other people? Why is it that. And they just like, bye. Someone else can clean up after us now. It just is shocking.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. So Serena's disgusted and she's gotta bleach everything. Cause super yacht standards means that charter guests won't have a little bug in the pasta salad. All right. Unless it's on purpose. You know, some bugs are very cute and edible. And so she tells Jason and he's like, oh, fuck it. Now we gotta clean everything. So they start their full clean of.

[Ben Mandelker]

The kitchen, and we are treated to many, many shots of weevils and maggots and I think even some stock footage in there. But a lot of weevil, a lot of weevil content in this episode. A lot of close ups. The maggots were really the. Those are really the. That really. That's the real visceral one there. I mean, weevil is just like little bugs, but the maggots, like, that really makes you feel something.

[Ronnie Karam]

Those things are disgusting. And we're all gonna have them inside of us when we die. Yay. So then we do the preference sheet meeting, and Jason tells us who the primary is. It's Mark. He's an investor from Brisbane, Australia, and he's bringing along his partner Megan, some of his closest friends, and anal beads. He loves his steak and he loves his meat. Well done. And he also tells his girlfriend to wash her ass. So he. He's obviously vegan. And you know you've done vegan before, right? She's like, I've done vegan anal beads, actually. So I think it's going to be a good one for me.

[Ben Mandelker]

She's like, I've just been vegan for a month. He's like, okay, perfect, right? But okay. So they say they want to use all the water and anal toys and inflatables. They're like, okay, great. So they want to do a global tasting menu. And so Jason goes, all right, that's 190 countries. She's like, excuse me, me? He's like, oh, 190 countries to choose from. She's like, okay, I'm probably not going to do that many, though.

[Ronnie Karam]

And then he just laughs. I like that she took him seriously. Like, I can't wait to see what you do for 190 countries. Stupid. And so now it's time to turn the boat over. And Briana is asking to get run through, turn downs and stuff. And so Marina teaches her, you know, chocolate on the pillow, light spline pillows. And Brianna is saying, like, I'm here to work hard and always happy to learn, but admittedly, I'm A Four Seasons girl. And that's my dad's fault because my dad's a lawyer in New Jersey and I'm an only child, so I'm his princess. So sorry, guys. You're gonna have to compete with my dad.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, that doesn't. This. This backstory for Stew never seems to work out. Well, I'm just gonna say this is.

[Ronnie Karam]

Your dad treats you like a little princess.

[Ben Mandelker]

This.

[Ronnie Karam]

Your dad has no problem with you being a maid. You know what? You're looking too far up your father's bung hole, okay? Your father hates you.

[Ben Mandelker]

We still remember Barbie, Okay? We still remember Barbie from below deck. Speaking of Barbies. So then Marina's like, so, do you find anyone in the boat cute? And Mar. And Brianna, the model is like, I actually think Harry's cute in law just, like, the way he is. And I don't know why I'm giving her a British accent. She's from New Jersey. She's like, oh, my God. I think that Harry's cute in the way he is. And Marina's like, really? The tall, awkward guy who looks like he's an inflatable thing outside of a used car dealership? She's like, yeah, I really like his energy.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Marina's like, okay, we've got all the sheets done. Now we're doing duvets and pillows. And Lara's like, oh, amazing. Okay, well, this needs to go higher. It needs to be aligned with the table side and get rid of the creases. This crease is disgusting. I'm in sheets with creases. No, no, no. All right, surfaces. Everybody surfaces. It's a long day. Thank you so much for work. Please get the wrinkles out of the duvet.

[Ben Mandelker]

She pats it down. So then the. Then van decides has a deck room meeting at the end of the day, and he's like, just want to say thank you all very much for the hard work and just something I want to address quickly. Obviously, some crew members do have a lot more experience than other crew members, but at this very moment, I'm not going to run with any lead deck hands, so get some good rest tonight. This was a message not aimed at anyone specifically, but anyway, let me just end it by saying, opa, thank you very much.

[Ronnie Karam]

So everything starts tomorrow, and it's in chaos, you know? And this is Anthony, the sous chef, and he's like, I've worked. I mean, every. Every boat I've worked on. The galley is absolutely spotless. So, yeah, I'm a little bit like, what have I got myself in for. Well, you've got yourself into cleaning a galley, so I hope you're used to that. He might must, because smaller boats don't have sous chefs. Right. So he must be used to working on, like, a giant boat where he's. There are a lot of sous chefs and people to clean and stuff like that. So, yeah, he's.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

Rude awakening.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yes. So now it's the next day. Everyone's getting ready for first day of charter. Everyone's, like, sweating already. They all, like, wake up refreshed, and then three seconds later, they all have sweat stains all over themselves. And Tsarina is, like, praising Anthony for. For, I guess, doing a lot. He, like, spent the night cleaning, so she's like, yeah, you're a legend with a capital L. And everything is sterilized. The weevils are gone and killed. So kitchen is up and running.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Jason likes Vian, and he's like. He's got a good cv. And what I want out of my bosun is someone thinking exactly what I'm thinking. Vyon what am I thinking? Hot dogs, Cracker Jacks, Fishing. A bowl. That's right. Taking my new children to a baseball game. God, you're good. You're very good.

[Ben Mandelker]

Jason then says, by the end of the season, him and I are going to be like two fishes in the water. We're working in unison. I was like, is that what fish do in the water? I feel like when you have two fish in the water, one eats the other fish.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, that's in the tank. Like, that's in a prison tank. Like, he has. But maybe I think he means, like, in regular water, how the fish all turn at the same time or how do they do that? That's so amazing.

[Ben Mandelker]

I don't know. They're crazy.

[Ronnie Karam]

Eat like starlings. You know those birds that fly all together, shapes and stuff. Those are so amazing. They're so good.

[Ben Mandelker]

Starlings love doing that. It's like, relax. We get it. You've got friends.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, they're. They're never not dancers, you know, they're like, oh, my God, look at the shapes we can make. I'm like, can we just have lunch? You know what I mean?

[Ben Mandelker]

And then meanwhile, tuna are down there in the sea making, like, tornadoes out of themselves. They're like, well, we could do tornadoes.

[Ronnie Karam]

No one's like, be a tuna. Tuna. You know what I mean? No one ever is like, I think, here's what I want from my team. I want us all to be like, tuna.

[Ben Mandelker]

So anyway, lunch is gonna be at 12. And Zarina is. Well, I should say crew. Lunch is gonna be at 12. So Zarina is giving Anthony some tips about how to make lunch for the crew. And she's like, okay, if I were you at school, the skin. He's like, yeah, I was gonna school it. She's like, okay, and I'll put some salt on it. Put parmesan on it. He's like, yeah, and it needs a bit of lemon juice and seasoning. Just. It takes two. Sex. Sorry, I didn't. I didn't mean to patronize you. By the way, you know what a fish is, right? Have you ever seen a fish? Okay, so it's this protein. It's like meat, but it's in the sea. We're gonna make that.

[Ronnie Karam]

He clearly hates her. And she can read it. And she's like, listen, I didn't mean to patronize you. I'm just guiding you because I'm Jedi Master. And he's like, die, please die. And he's like, God, she's already micromanaging. Just let the man cook. Cook. It's gonna be a real fun season. She doesn't know how you cook. Okay, Your CV doesn't even make any sense. It's a lie. There's lies on your cv. So I think she needs. Just shut up. I mean, that's your job. No chef is supposed to be nice. I don't understand this whole thing where you're coming in and expecting your chef to kiss your ass. Like, that really shows inexperience on your part.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, I think that basically she should just let it. Him do the crew food and don't even give direction. Just say, I want, like, a. Whatever it is, Fish and a salad. See how he does it. And then you know what his instincts are, because if you start telling him what to do, you're actually not going to get a sense necessarily of, like, where his baseline is and then just go from there.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. So then the crew has lunch, and then we see a bio for the primary guest, Mark and Megan. They're from Brisbane, Australia. Mark is an investor in property development, and Megan is a model and actress. And fart sometimes without even knowing it. They've been dating for eight months.

[Ben Mandelker]

And then the guests come on and they get the tour. And Anthony is like. He's like, asking about serving the caviar, and Zarina's like, well, you know, it's the caviar. Take the cucumber. You know, we do. You get the lawns, then you chop it. You know, the lawns. Have you heard of a cucumber before? It's a vegetable. You're familiar with vegetables, right?

[Ronnie Karam]

I don't want to eat caviar on a cucumber.

[Ben Mandelker]

I don't want to do that either.

[Ronnie Karam]

Bleeny. What have I done to you that you're serving me a cucumber? Gross.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, no, I want something like a Bleeny or something crispy, but I don't want a cucumber.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. So then now lines and all that, and Lara's bringing up caviar, and then.

[Ben Mandelker]

She has to bring it up on, like a. On like a bicycle. This big metal bicycle thing that has, like, three plates on it, and she has to balance it going up three stairs in the extreme humidity. I was like, this is so cruel.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Brianna has to call Lara, and Lara's, like, a little busy here going three flights. She's like, listen, I'm a little busy too, because I have found something. I'm not really sure what to do. While unpacking their luggage. And it's the anal beads. And Laura's like, oh, is that the only sex toy? God, is there anything massage y or something in there? She goes, no, there's more. And she's like, well, maybe just put that in the side table. All right, Just put that in the side table next to something that says nausea. Because don't they put it next to nausea medication or something?

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, it's next to a pack that says nausea relief. And then like, anal beads.

[Ronnie Karam]

And I like. I like that she featured that one. She's like, are there more sex toys? Okay, only feature the anal beads. Put that inside table.

[Ben Mandelker]

Put it next to the barbel and the nausea release leaf. So the anchor goes down, water toys come out. Lots of, like, jet skis. Fun times, etc. And then Lara's talking to Zarina about the menu for this evening, the global tasting menu. So Zarina's like, well, this thought is going to be gazpacho and watermelon and lime and strawberry soup. And then Lars like, do you have bowls? Like, yeah, bowls, whatever. And they're basically, like, making sure that they have, like, all the silverware and flatware and plates and bowls.

[Ronnie Karam]

But this is kind of an important part, just because she's like, chef bowls. You have spoons. You need spoons for this. You need bowls for that. And she goes, well, this one's going to be very. She says, this dish? And she's like, okay, so I need a knife and fork for that. And she says, well, I mean, it's saucy as well. And so that's the big thing, because later it becomes like, I had no idea we'd need a spoon. Crazy Barbie. She told you very clearly, ma'am. And she also says, you need to write this stuff down. And Lara's like, no, I don't need to write it down. Which.

[Ben Mandelker]

Right. But also, to be fair, like, when Tsarina says tom Kagay, like, I'm pretty sure that's a soup. So, like, why. When Lara says knife and fork, why does Tsarina say it's a soup? Provide a spoon. Because it felt like, by the way.

[Ronnie Karam]

Everything Big onion, bhaji or whatever in the center. So she's only putting, like, a little bit of that soup down as the sauce for this big onion thing. So they also will need a knife and fork. But she's like, yeah, it's saucy, meaning also a spoon.

[Ben Mandelker]

It felt like everything she winds up serving was a soup. To be honest, I don't think they used.

[Ronnie Karam]

She served two soups in a row, which was weird.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

I mean, I would love it. I love soup. But, like, it's weird.

[Ronnie Karam]

I don't. I feel like if you serve me two soups in a row, you're calling me fat. And I get very offended.

[Ben Mandelker]

I would love an evening of soups.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Serena is like, well, the last boat I worked on with Lara, the captain did give her control over the boat, which was kind of annoying because she ran with it, you know, and she had to save my guest food, my crew food. And we're gonna need a little bit more balance. It's not her way or the highway. We're gonna be working as a team. We're a family.

[Ben Mandelker]

And Lara tells us the captain trusts my standards, and sometimes I had to go to the galley and give her bad news. And this isn't up to standard. And you know, what how. And you know, can we work on it? Things like that, which didn't always go down well, like. Like a lead balloon, in fact.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

So then we see toys are getting put away and everything. So Johnny did not take the key with him to bring the Jet Ski in, but so he. Johnny, there's a thing. Johnny leaves his radio on the deck. On the deck, and then goes out to get the. The Jet Ski to untether it, but doesn't have the key. And long story short, short, he winds up stranded on the Jet Ski without a radio and without a key. I don't know how that happens. I don't know why he didn't bring his radio. But that's just what happened.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, he said, like, should I bring my radio? And he says, no, you can leave it here. So he's like, okay. And he goes all the way out, and then he's stuck without a key all the way out there. And I love when this happens to the most arrogant people, you know?

[Ben Mandelker]

Yes. And he's out there for a while because it's like the sun is up when he goes out there.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

By the time they find him, it is nighttime.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. And he's trying to whistle, but he can't really whistle. He's just like, no key. No key. So finally, Harry figures it out, and they go get him. And Harry's like, I mean, Mr. Lead Deckhand over here. Can't even check to see if the key's in the jet ski before he unties it. Rookie.

[Ben Mandelker]

So Jason's like, you know, John is floating on a jet ski to Madagascar, Embarrassing as it is, is, I'll let it slide as long as it doesn't happen again. And then Johnny is just, like, really embarrassed and everything. So now everyone's getting ready for dinner and stuff. And Tsarina tells us, well, the guests have requested some flavors from around the world. So I'm thinking Europe and Mediterranean, Asian food and Indian food. Lots of flavors, sauces. I just want to make soup on soup on soup. Like, lots of soups. Soups from around the world.

[Ronnie Karam]

All right. So Laura comes up, and she's like, the first course is Italian. Yes. You've heard it. Out of 190 countries, we've chosen the most basic for service. Italian, everybody. We've got gasparto. That's a bit different, Much like the dork who made it. Strawberry, watermelon, tarragon, and gold sprinkles. Now, if you're asking yourself, is this a classy boat, it is, because there will be gold on everything today. It's like, okay, a little gold's okay, but I don't need to poop out a golden crappy award. Okay.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

It's a lot of gold. She puts it on everything thing.

[Ben Mandelker]

Also, isn't gaspacho Spanish, not Italian? Seems strange that that was representing Italy. And of all the things. All the things that represent Italy's gazpacho, something's around. I thought gazpacho was. It was Spanish. A classic Spanish soup.

[Ronnie Karam]

Who invented gaspacho? I'm just curious. I don't doubt you. Gazpacho. The exact origins from gazpacho are unknown, but it's generally Believed to have originated in Andalusia, Spain. Guys, it could have also been from Rome, the Moors, and the New World.

[Ben Mandelker]

It could have been from anywhere. Gazpacho.

[Ronnie Karam]

You know why? Because they didn't have heat everywhere. So some cold fucking soup, okay? Who knows who invented cold soup? That shit came out a long time ago.

[Ben Mandelker]

It landed. It arrived on a meteor. Gazpacho.

[Ronnie Karam]

Gazpacho. It's interesting reading here because. Because gazpacho actually means we haven't invented microwaves yet, which is interesting.

[Ben Mandelker]

I didn't know gazpacho is the favorite soup of weird Barbies everywhere. They love it. So now it's time for the next one, which is this onion baji. And Lara's like, it's very saucy. Marina, could you put some spoons out? Quick, quick, quick, quick, quick. So Marina has to go all the way downstairs to get the spoons. I mean, I guess maybe it's time to start saving. Keeping the utensils upstairs because she has to go all the way downstairs to get the spoons. And there's a lot of Marina going up and downstairs. And we even get, like a tally that's like, Marina has climbed now 4,500 stairs in the past three minutes.

[Ronnie Karam]

So then meanwhile, Anthony in the kitchen is like, so, do you need help plating? Because it's chaos. And she's like, no, it's just too many elements, but thank you so much for offering. And she just has to do everything by herself. And this is going to bite her in the ass. She's not using this guy. And, I mean, I think the guy's an asshole. I hate his attitude. But, yeah, she's not making the best choice here so far.

[Ben Mandelker]

She should be using him. Like, why?

[Ronnie Karam]

Just.

[Ben Mandelker]

Just use him. Like it's not a big deal. Like, why not? Why not be faster, right?

[Ronnie Karam]

So then Lara is like, now we've gone to Inja, so you've got some anjin bhaji, the korma sauce, and avocado salsa. And guess what? Maybe no one important has told you this yet, but it's sauce. See, let's enjoy that.

[Ben Mandelker]

So then Laura is like, all right, well, so wait, the next course is a soup as well. Apostle, we do need a spoon. I thought you said knife and fork. And Serena says, yeah, I thought it would be, but it's getting cold, so we need to hurry up, hurry up, hurry up. Lar's like, well, we can't serve a soup without the spoons. So she's like, marina, I'm terribly Sorry, but we need spoons for another soup. Okay. And so Tsarina's getting, like, anxious because, you know, like, the soup is getting cold.

[Ronnie Karam]

And she's like, I mean, come on, it's a soup. You wrote it down, didn't you? And she goes, well, I mean, I wrote the simplest version down. I just. Let me tell you what my notes say. Stupid. Ugly. Fez says, stupid, dumb, dumb. Hate her. Please don't make me room with this ugly bitch. How am I supposed to know this? This Boo. He never said that.

[Ben Mandelker]

And then Anthony is like, we're so sorry. It's a bit. It's a bit noisy in here. Kind of like implying that Zarina is disorganized, which is why Lara didn't hear it right. So Zarina's like, well, I'm glad it is a soup because if it was something else, it'd be cold by now. So then they finally bring the soup up and I guess, oh, some of the soup has chicken, some has mushroom, etc, And Lara's like, hey, just so you know, they love the soup and sorry, I didn't mean to be snappy. It's just. It's hot and there's, like a lot of going upstairs. And also, you never told me it was a fucking soup that needed a spoon. Anyway, sorry to be snappy.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Serena forgives it or whatever. Let's just move on. So then we go to Harry, talking to Brianna about her day. And she's like, I found some interesting things while packing, unpacking some bags. And he's like, oh, what did they bring? Tell me. She like, butt plugs. And he goes, oh, no. Do you have access to those still? You didn't lock them away, did you Keep them in the night? Side table. Right, so we keep things like that.

[Ben Mandelker]

So then. So then Tsarina's checking in on Anthony and asking if he's fed up. And he's like, no, I'm fine. And she's like, I just. I don't want you really working this much. And I feel bad. And he's like, it's pretty chill for me. And she just doesn't acknowledge it. He's like, did you hear me? I was trying to be passive aggressive. This is chill for me. Hello. Are you receiving my passive aggression?

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. And he's like, I'm a Sue chef, not a Sue dish chef.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, because he's basically been in the corner this entire meal service. Just, like, washing dishes. They keep cutting to him, just scrubbing things and, like, wiping down surfaces and wiping down the Refrigerator. Just angry.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. They're both suffering from things that it's typical for chefs to suffer from, which is bad communication. They both. They both need to communicate a lot, lot better. So then it's the next morning, and Laura's like, well, last night wasn't great, but if I gave up, I wouldn't be where I am today. And where I am is the golden sugar cube winner for 10 years in a row, thanks to my father running me around the horse tracks. I actually beat a pony last week. That was good.

[Ben Mandelker]

You know, there are times I thought I was going to die, but I had to give up. Or that I thought I had to give up. But there's always good things around the corner. There's no dying in yachting. Unless, of course, your yacht sinks, in which case you could die. So then.

[Ronnie Karam]

Did anyone else just hear the Titanic theme playing?

[Ben Mandelker]

I was like, girl, literally, that's what boating can be known. One of the biggest movies of all time is about people dying on a boat. So now it's the morning. I think we already established that. And Lara's running around getting coffees and waters and stuff like that. And the problem is the primary woke up before everyone else. The primary is hungry and wants breakfast, but no one's ready yet. And he's getting antsy and Lara's getting frantic, and so she's hot, her legs are tired. So just she decides to take the coffee up in the elevator. And then the elevator breaks. So she's stuck in the elevator with.

[Ronnie Karam]

Her coffee and she can't have a radio. She doesn't have the radio working in the elevator. So people are barking orders and she can't hear them, and it's a huge mess. But I would like to point out that last night, Serena came up to talk to the chefs, to talk to the guests, and said, so tomorrow breakfast is 8:30. Good. And they all said, 8:30 is great. So this down there at 8:00am, like, where's my breakfast? Shut up. You said 8:30. You agreed to 8:30, so don't act like you didn't hear it. Yep.

[Ben Mandelker]

So then Lara, she goes, takes everyone's orders and they all put in orders for various egg items. And then Zarina's like, but are you going to tell them what the special is? Did you tell them that we have a breakfast soup available for them? And she's like, no, it's gold soup.

[Ronnie Karam]

It's. The special is gold breakfast soupacho.

[Ben Mandelker]

It's a Tuscan breakfast gazpacho.

[Ronnie Karam]

And she's like, well, but they just said, can we have these eggs? No, you have to go down and tell them, here's the special. Here's what everybody's getting. That's it. And then if they ask for something extra, then you do it. But you don't tell a bunch of starving people. All right, anything you want, right?

[Ben Mandelker]

Because then you're making a million things. But in this case, though, luckily Tsarina has a sous chef who can help make all these eggs, and yet she still does not use Anthony. I mean, come on, lady. Like, you can let him make eggs. You will this. He will be able to do the eggs, I guarantee it.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. So she's like, oh, God, this is what I was worried about with Lara. You come to the head chef and ask how you would like breakfast done. You don't just go up and do your own thing. I need it to be my way to get the flow going. And Anthony's like, do you want a hand? She goes, no, no, I'm fine. She's got spoons flying everywhere. Tofu eggs, regular eggs, cashew eggs, gold eggs, gazpacho eggs.

[Ben Mandelker]

You know, the thing is this. I sympathize with this. Like, Lara, the messaging of breakfast. But, like, you know, Zarina, I can't be that. Like, I can't be that empathetic because you're all harried and you're feeling chaotic right now, but you have someone who is literally there to help you, and you're not using them. So you need to start. You need to start delegating.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. So Serena's like, I'm just. It's okay. I'm just trying to avoid this like the plague. And it's a little annoying right now. So Laura goes to her room and cries eyes.

[Ben Mandelker]

She's like, oh.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Anthony's like, you need to utilize me a bit more, I think. And she goes, yeah. And he goes, yeah. I mean, I know it's a little bit funny in the chaos, but I work normally a bit more organized and efficient, which also is not the best way to communicate that. Wait till it's done and just say, listen, I know you don't know me and you have no reason to trust me, but I'm here to help you. I can cook. Let me take on some of this stuff.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yes, it was very man slain and condescending. But then they do cut away to the rest of the kitchen and there's, like, shit everywhere. There's, like, cartons of milk on their side and, like, lemons tumbling off the counter onto the Floor burning, helping with that.

[Ronnie Karam]

I mean, I think if she saw him, like, going around picking up everything and like, helping her stay organized and handing her what she needs before she needs it and, like, showing that he could be good at it, then she would trust him a little bit more. But instead he's just standing there like, what a pigsty. Well, yeah, you're just standing there. Get to work.

[Ben Mandelker]

He's like, I find this a bit overwhelming, you know, that's all. And there's shit everywhere. And we can definitely implement plans and structures that make it a bit easier. But of if we work as a team, like this morning, we could have worked as a team. Like, that's how it should work. Right?

[Ronnie Karam]

And so Serena's already breaking. She's like, oh, my God. First of all, I've got Barbie up there crying, causing me chaos, and now I've got this little sous chef twat. So I just need him to support me as a sue, which is position second to head chef. Dun, dun, dun. Yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

But, yeah, shit show.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, it's a shit show. It's going to be a fun one. Wow. Usually the first episode, there's not this much going on on.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. And I like that there's, like, lots of stuff going on in each department, so it's gonna be a good one. Blow deck down under is always. It's kind of like a top tier blow deck. So, yeah. Looking forward to the season.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. It's gonna be some good times. All right, everybody, thanks so much for being with us. If you want this on video, it'[e-mail] along with our traders recaps. Also, go stream the golden crappies. It's available till February 14. Find the link on our site and we'll see. See you soon. This week, actually Thursday and Friday, Salt Lake City and Denver where we will be doing Salt Lake City and Southern charm. Go find our other show dates at watch what crappens.com and we will talk to you next time. Bye.

[Ben Mandelker]

Bye. Watch what Crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alison King.

[Ronnie Karam]

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[Ben Mandelker]

Berg this is living with Michelle Vivian.

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And our super Premium sponsors she's VVIP it's Amanda V. Somebody get us 10.

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[Ronnie Karam]

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[Ben Mandelker]

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Put on a kettle for Rebecca Weddle.

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[Ronnie Karam]

No shrinking violet Coutar we love you guys. If you like, watch what crappens. You can listen ad free right now by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself. By filling out a short survey at.

[Keke Palmer]

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[Ronnie Karam]

Everyone out there should listen to Small Town Murder. You really should. Mainly because you never know who's next door. And that's, that's the point of this show, really. You never know who is next door. You never know what's gonna happen on Small Town Murder. That's what makes it so wonderful. The only thing you do know is that people are gonna die. Yeah. And we're probably gonna make jokes about it. That's it. That's all we can promise you.

[Ben Mandelker]

We dig into these towns, we see.

[Ronnie Karam]

What makes them tick, from local legends to scandals they may have had. And of course, the biggest scandals of all, horrible murders that take place there. And we put our, what I feel is a completely appropriate comedic spin on the whole thing. And you know, you need a laugh right now. So get in there, listen to Small Town Murder. Follow Small Town Murder on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcast. Podcasts. You can listen to Small Town Murder early and ad free right now on Wondery Plus.