#2740 Below Deck Down Under S03E04 Part One: No Excuses, Brah

Summary

Watch What Crappens: Episode #2740 – Below Deck Down Under S03E04 Part One: No Excuses, Brah

Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam
Release Date: February 25, 2025
Podcast Platform: Wondery

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Introduction

In Episode #2740 of Watch What Crappens, hosts Ben Mandelker and Ronnie Karam dive deep into the drama unfolding in Season 3, Episode 4 of Below Deck Down Under, titled "No Excuses, Brah". This episode, part one of a two-part series, highlights the intense interpersonal conflicts and chaotic management aboard the yacht. Ben and Ronnie provide their trademark mix of praise, ridicule, and sharp commentary, ensuring listeners get a comprehensive and entertaining breakdown of the episode's key moments.

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Key Plot Points

1. The Firing of Anthony

At the heart of this episode is the dramatic termination of Anthony, the sous chef, by Captain Jason. Ben opens the discussion by noting, “I have a greater understanding of what we need to do to support fellow men in our society...” (03:05). However, Ronnie immediately counters, describing Anthony as an "inexpensive Groupon facial surgery, which is what, yeah, Douchebag has" (03:39). The hosts express their disdain for Anthony's behavior, particularly mocking his unconventional method of putting on his shirt, which Ben describes as “unhinged” (11:22).

Notable Quote:

Ronnie Karam (03:39): "Dude, stop worrying about your *** self help and go get some proper eyes Done, sir."

2. Captain Jason's Kimono Line

A significant subplot involves Captain Jason launching his own line of kimonos, dubbed the "Captain's Lounge". Ben and Ronnie scrutinize his marketing tactics, highlighting inconsistencies and mock failures due to Instagram's grid changes. Ben points out, “...it looks like it says captain's dung” (09:11), underscoring the mishap in the brand's presentation.

Notable Quote:

Ben Mandelker (09:11): "This mosaic was clearly created... it looks like it says captain's done."

3. Crew Struggles and Increased Workload

With Anthony's departure, Serena, the executive chef, is left to handle additional responsibilities. She expresses overwhelmed feelings, stating, “I worry about the season without my boy” (15:00). The hosts empathize but also criticize Serena’s coping mechanisms, with Ronnie sarcastically suggesting she should have managed Anthony's exit more harshly.

Notable Quote:

Ronnie Karam (12:40): "I just wish we could follow him to watch him fail miserably his next job... I want to see him miserable."

4. The Introduction of Eric Rock

A recurring antagonist in this episode is Eric Rock, a self-help guru conducting online seminars aboard the yacht. Ben and Ronnie parody his attempts to impart wisdom, dubbing him a “regular douchebag” (18:03). They mock his promotional efforts and questionable credibility, especially highlighting his inadequately styled appearance and ineffective seminars.

Notable Quote:

Ben Mandelker (19:08): "It's all from this kind of like, Joe Rogan space of, like, bra. And it's the worst thing of all time."

5. Guest Interactions and Casino Night Chaos

The episode crescendos with the hosting of Casino Night, where Serena serves an extravagant yet impractical menu featuring French onion soup with grilled cheese sandwiches. The hosts criticize the excessive focus on soup, with Ronnie lamenting, “Have you ever seen someone this obsessed with soup?” (41:58). The guests' dissatisfaction is palpable, leading to further tension among the crew.

Notable Quote:

Ben Mandelker (42:17): "Soup that'll make you have stinky thoughts for the next 18 hours."

6. Brianna and Harry’s Romantic Tension

Amidst the chaos, a subplot involves Brianna questioning Harry about a kiss they shared. Their awkward interactions add another layer of drama, which Ben humorously compares to past episodes’ melodramatic twists.

Notable Quote:

Ronnie Karam (60:29): "They're kind of perfect together. But I also feel like if they were pioneer people in Lonesome Dove, they'd be the first people killed."

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Hosts' Commentary and Insights

Throughout the episode, Ben and Ronnie intersperse their analysis with sharp humor and candid opinions. They critique the characters' decisions, management styles, and the overall direction of the show. Their frustration with Captain Jason's leadership and Serena's overwhelmed state is evident, often resorting to sarcastic remarks and exaggerated scenarios to emphasize their points.

Notable Insights:

• Captain Jason’s Leadership: The hosts believe Captain Jason's decision to fire Anthony was a mistake, suggesting harsher punishments would have been more effective.

  Ben Mandelker (30:35): “I feel like I’m pushed to the bench. But I got a text message...”

• Serena's Overload: Serena’s struggle to manage the increased workload is highlighted, with both hosts sympathizing yet critiquing her inability to delegate or handle stress.

  Ronnie Karam (42:32): “I can't wait to see what happens next.”

• Eric Rock’s Mockery: Eric’s ineffective self-help seminars are a recurring target, with Ben and Ronnie delving into his lack of authenticity and real success.

  Ben Mandelker (20:53): “I don't know if you found success. I think you've just found a nice, nice amount.”

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Conclusion

As Part One of their two-part recap concludes, Ben and Ronnie leave listeners eagerly anticipating the continuation of the episode’s drama. They wrap up with sharp jabs at the characters' flaws and an anticipatory tease for Part Two, promising more in-depth analysis and humorous commentary.

Closing Quote:

Ben Mandelker (63:27): “Watch what happens. Why don't they know there's no dragon here? We just told them to imagine them.”

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Stay Tuned for Part Two:
Ben and Ronnie promise to delve deeper into the unfolding drama in Part Two of their recap. Listeners are encouraged to stay engaged for more entertaining insights and unfiltered opinions on the latest happenings in Below Deck Down Under.

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Note: This summary omits advertisements, intros, outros, and non-content sections to focus solely on the episode's substantive discussions.

Transcript

[Ben Mandelker]

Some of our favorite Housewives episodes are when the cast goes on group vacations. I mean, hello, we just watched SLC go nuts in Mexico. Or what about Scary Island? Or what about Morocco? I mean, it goes on and on and on.

[Ronnie Karam]

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[Ben Mandelker]

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[Ronnie Karam]

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[Ben Mandelker]

I mean, we love our children. I believe the children are our future. But you know what? Sometimes if I'm going on a cruise, it's kind of nice to, you know, have all adults. Am I right? Virgin Voyages have been voted world's best by Travel and Leisure and Conde Nast readers for the second year in a row. Experience it for yourself.

[Ronnie Karam]

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[Monica Lewinsky]

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[Ronnie Karam]

Bombas are so absurdly comfortable you may throw out all your other clothes.

[Monica Lewinsky]

Sorry, do we legally have to say that?

[Ronnie Karam]

No, this is just how I talk. And I really love my Bombas.

[Monica Lewinsky]

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[Ben Mandelker]

To feel good and do good, go.

[Ronnie Karam]

To bombas.com wondry and use code wondry.

[Ben Mandelker]

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[Ronnie Karam]

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[Shelly]

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[Ben Mandelker]

Watch what happens. Watch what crap is. Who cares what happens when there's something know. Hello and welcome to Watch With Crappin, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandel Ker. And joining me today is the pinnacle of manhood, the male form. Maleness it is. Mr. Ronnie Karam. Hi, Ronnie, how are you?

[Ronnie Karam]

Hi. That's so sweet. Thank you. Maybe I'm the pinochle.

[Ben Mandelker]

Pinochle. Well, you know, I just feel like after seeing this self help guru on Below Deck Down Under, I have a greater understanding of what we need to do to support fellow men in our society. The most trampled upon demographic. And this thanks to this guy who was on this boat. I'm like, you know what? Now I know we just need to touch more men and we have to ask men, what do they want? What do men want? Because you know, the thing is men just don't go out and grab what they want enough on their own. So thank you.

[Ronnie Karam]

Extremely inexpensive Groupon facial surgery, which is what, yeah, Douchebag has. Dude, stop worrying about your fucking self help and go get some proper eyes Done, sir.

[Ben Mandelker]

Okay. Yeah, I love that. For as much as this guy is obsessed with self help and talking about his own, you know, his own success that he's achieved, he is like incredibly obsessive about every single calorie that goes into his body. Like there's something about like that you would say that it's. Oh, because he's like a high functioning machine and needs to put probably the fuel in the machine. It's like, no, you are still dealing with the neuroses that we all deal with. Ha. So that made me happy.

[Ronnie Karam]

I know. I love thin people who are so worried about being fat. They're my favorite. They're my favorite. That's my favorite insecurity. I saw something on Reddit today that was like, Tate McCray, finally a normal, average body in pop culture. What the are you talking about?

[Ben Mandelker]

Tate McCray.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. Tate McCray is a perfect bodied. What are people talking about? They're like, finally a full figured woman. Shut the up, all of you. I hope you all get on the boat with this douchebag and then I'll sink it.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, I think it's time. You know, famous people are getting annoying names these days. Tate McCray, Benson, Boone. They all sort of sound the same. They all sound like they're. I don't know. Okay.

[Ronnie Karam]

I just officially sound like Lonesome dove characters.

[Ben Mandelker]

Take McGray, Bunsen, Bone Chaperone.

[Ronnie Karam]

And Boone was in love with Cotton. Cotton.

[Ben Mandelker]

Drip was in love with Log. What happened? The good old days of Like a Whitney Houston, you know? Okay, I'm officially.

[Ronnie Karam]

What happened to the Rondel Wideus of the World? That's what I.

[Ben Mandelker]

Right. That's what I want to know. So, anyway, today we're here to talk about Below Deck down under, which you might not even believe, considering how we've started this episode. That's my fault. I'm steering the ship today, and I've steered it, Captain Jason style, right aground. But before we get into that, we have our. We have our tour that is resuming in March, and we're gonna be going to so many cities. We are going to kick things off mid March by going back to Cincinnati, where we had a very raucous show a few years ago. And so we're excited to come back there. Minneapolis, Toronto, Charlotte at Atlanta, D.C. and Philadelphia. And those are just the shows for March. There's a whole other bunch of shows for April and May, including our very first Vegas show. I'd like to point out, I feel like we haven't really. We haven't really emphasized that we are doing a Vegas show. And, hello, that's going to be wild and super fun. But anyway, all the tickets [e-mail] and you can also get Patreon there. Patreon.com watch crappins. We're covering traders on Patreon, so if you want to hear our thoughts on that, go check that out. And you can also watch us with Crappets on Demand via Patreon. So go do all those fun things. Okay. In the meantime, why don't we dive into Below Deck down under. Season 3, Episode 4 Kiss and don't Tell. Yeah, that's the episode.

[Ronnie Karam]

Listen, don't tell. Maids making out. Maids making out. Maids making out. Second day of charge. Captain is dumping Anthony in the galley. He's like, right, start cleaning up your stuff here because we can drive you to the marina straight away. There's a line. There's a line. All right, you quit, you leave immediately. All right. I just like to keep that line. All right. Would you like a kimono on your way out? Please. Hashtag Captain Jason. Did you hear that? Captain Jason's all about his kimonos because he's starting a kimono line.

[Ben Mandelker]

I did not hear that. I'll tell you when I want to get a kimono. The first person I look to is a yacht captain. I'm excited about this. Okay, so he has a kimono line coming out. That's. That's. Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

I searched Captain Jason Kimono lounge, and it's called Captain Jason Chambers cabin. Is that what it's called? The Captain Lounge? Oh, it's called the Captain's Lounge. If you go on his Facebook, you can see him lying back in a kimono and giving sexy eyes to the camera. I don't think this is going to work for a lot of people. We'll say this right now.

[Ben Mandelker]

Okay, well, here's what's funny. If you go. So he has an Instagram page.

[Ronnie Karam]

Are you looking at the Facebook thing? Harry comes out modeling one with his goofy face. He's like, I'm in a kimono. Can you believe it?

[Ben Mandelker]

So here's. I can't even deal with that. So here's. So he has. On Captain Jason's Instagram, he has a link to another Instagram that's the Captain's Lounge, which is for these kimonos. And he's done the thing. There's only six posts, and they create a mosaic. And then you know how when people do that, like, if you look at your grid, it creates an overall picture. So the six pictures together, you have the logo that says Captain's Lounge. And then you see. And then he's, like, lounging across the sofa in the kimono. But the problem is the mosaic. This mosaic was clearly created when Instagram was making the grid look like a whole bunch of squares. But Instagram recently changed their grid to be a whole bunch of rectangles, which means that this entire mosaic is all messed up. And what it looks like it says is captain's dung. Because. Because the L and the E got cut off and the line is going through the O, so it looks like it says captain's done.

[Ronnie Karam]

Oh, my gosh. Charting a new course. How moving to the Philippines changed my life. When I made the bold move to a beautiful and remote spot in the Philippines a few years back, I was searching for adventure and a fulfilling life for myself and my family. This journey wasn't without its challenges. So I took off my underwear and put on some silk. Captain's Lounge.

[Ben Mandelker]

So Captain's lunch. I'm on the official website. Oh, it's a personal block and online store. Notably, not a single kimono on the. On the page. That's fine.

[Ronnie Karam]

Noticing that. Yeah, I'm looking for. Well, wait, let me go to shop. My online store is launching soon. Well, you know, my ass is going to be on this store.

[Ben Mandelker]

Captain Jason lounging in a kimono. Get on the mailing list to get your complimentary kimono.

[Ronnie Karam]

It's the Captain's Lounge. Wow. Love it. That said, I don't think that fashion's gonna work for me if I. If anything, I need, like, I don't know, the five snuggies, whatever. I'm not really a kimono. I don't think I could pull off a kimono.

[Ben Mandelker]

I don't know if I'm a kimono type either, but maybe. I don't know. You never know. You never know till you try it. Little sassy, sassy thigh, thigh revealing kimono.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. All right. So anyway, he's firing that douchebag Anthony. So Anthony's just like, okay. And so then he points to Serena like, okay, you got your wish now. Have fun doing everything yourself. And she's like, oh, God, I need to kick into gear. Yeah, everything's gonna be fine. Yeah, everything's gonna be fine down here.

[Ben Mandelker]

She starts to spiral and spirals the rest of the episode. So then, now Captain Jason is telling Lara that Anthony's leaving and that he's got some CVs, but it's gonna take time, you know, time for people to get to the Seychelles. And so then Anthony's going around being like, well, I'm off skis. And, you know, he immediately changes out of his uniform, and he gets into his T shirt in that strange straight jacket way that he did last week where he drops the shirt all the way down to his waist, but keeps his hands by his waist and then squeezes his hands up through the shirt and into the sleeves. First of also stretching out your shirt when you do that, which is, you know, ridiculous. And second of all, you're.

[Ronnie Karam]

You're.

[Ben Mandelker]

You're unhinged. You're a lunatic. How are you putting on your shirts that way?

[Ronnie Karam]

This says.

[Ben Mandelker]

This speaks to your. Your instability. And. And I do not trust you whatsoever.

[Ronnie Karam]

Speaks to your instability. How you put on your shirt speaks yours. I think that he's maybe like Houdini. It. Like, he's always trying to figure out a problem. Like, this shirt's lazy shirt. Don't do it. It's supposed to do, mate. And just, like, trying to, like, crawl through the shirt, like, wow, you' Damn, you got through your shirt. Congratulations.

[Ben Mandelker]

He just thinks outside the box, like he does with his cuisine. So he says. He. He's telling people. He tells Johnny, like, I got offered another job, mate. And everyone's talking like, oh, my God, Anthony's leaving. Anthony's leaving. Oh, that's crazy. That's crazy. And he goes. And then Johnny's really sad about it. He's like, this is the saddest news I've gotten Today. But to be fair, it's the only news I've gotten today. So slow news day, am I right? Okay, bye.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Beon's like, oh, this industry ain't for the faint hearted. A mate. And they're like, yeah. And so Derek calls it. She's like, serena's gonna freak. She's gonna freak, y'all. And so he's now saying bye to Brianna and then he's telling us. I feel really confident about my decision to live as look back on the season, the one regret I have was taking the job in the first place. I just wish we could follow him to watch him fail miserably his next job, because I haven't.

[Ben Mandelker]

I know. I actually really hope that Bravo hires him to be the head chef on another below deck so we can just see him fail miserably. Like, I really, really want that. And knowing his cocky ass, he probably would come back to below deck to be like, now everyone can see what I'd be like as a head chef. Well, you know what, if you can't put your shirt on correct, you can't put a. You can't put tartar on a cracker. So, you know, relax.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, you put on a shirt like you sous vide an octopus.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, Badly, poorly.

[Ronnie Karam]

So he's like, yeah, I'm excited to be a head chef from an expo. Cook things my way, not be pushed into a box.

[Ben Mandelker]

All right, well, we saw how we could. How you cook things your way, sous vide octopus. So then Anthony leaves, he's gone, bye, bye. And Captain Jason's texting, you know, Australian Norma and being like, hey there, I need a sous chef right away. Can I get some cvs? And she's like, bloop, bloop, straw right away. Get you someone as soon as possible.

[Ronnie Karam]

She's like, I'll send you some CVS as long as you promise to wear pants. We're having a problem with HR on the kimono, sir. All right.

[Ben Mandelker]

So Jason's like, well, a man down on deck. We need to find another sous chef very quickly and we can't let that affect the guest experience. The show must go on. So I'm going to get the guests go. I'm going to get the guests off, go for a dive, allow the crew to reset. Check out that moray eel down below who's been saying hello to the camera every single episode and get ready for round two.

[Ronnie Karam]

And Australian Norma is named Shelley and she's last minute, but we'll look and get back to. Yeah, Shelly, we know it's last minute. I love Shelly's attitude. She's like, a little last minute in it. In it.

[Ben Mandelker]

Sorry, Shelley, sorry for interrupting your viewing of Australian Matlock, but could you please get to the hiring of the CVs of the chefs and stuff?

[Ronnie Karam]

So then the drinks are delivered to the guests while Serena is like, oh, now that Anthony's gone, I've just got so much more to do. Cleaning, cooking. I've got to do everything, don't I? Yeah. Welcome back to being a chef on Below. Back where you don't have help.

[Ben Mandelker]

You know, you did it all last season and you will do it again now.

[Ronnie Karam]

You'll do it again. I believe in you. Just kidding. But I'm excited to see whatever happens.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. So Brianna's asking if they're going to bring her, like, any extra help and everything. And Ser is saying how, like, crew food was Anthony's role, and now I'm having to take it on. It's just, you know, 12 extra people to cook for the potato. Potential for burnout is very high, and I don't know if I can handle it, but I'm going to die trying, or at least I'll complain. Trying.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. And her face is giving me confidence. This is her face. She just looks terrified. So this is gonna happen immediately. So Brianna's like, well, what do you think is gonna happen with Harry? She's like, oh, God, I don't know. But I worry about the season without my boy. I worry about it because let's not forget Harry is in the hospital about to die from a thumbnail emergency. So he could be gone at any second. So Brian is like. I mean, I was really looking forward to getting to know him. We haven't. We haven't had our talk about kissing.

[Ben Mandelker]

And Zarina's like, yeah, it's not fair. She'll see. Well, I just. Just let me know how I can help you through this charter. And also let me know if Carrie said anything about the kiss. Did he mean it? Was it an accident? Did he even know who I was? Did he think he was kissing an AI rendition of something or version of something? I don't know. Just please tell me. So then outside on the deck, this guy Eric is. He's the primary. He's doing, like, a online coaching video call on Zoom. And he's like, hey, guys, you can't all be talking. No action. And you'll feel that pressure. You better walk the walk. It puts a whole new type of accountability and pressure on you, okay? Because that's the way the cookie crumbles. No use crying over spilled milk, you know, you can't have your cake and eat it too. Nice work if you can get it. Am I right?

[Ronnie Karam]

It's like bras. All right, look, bird in your hand. Is that really better than two birds in the bush? You know what I say birds kill the birds. Rip their skin off and eat them. You need the protein. All right, who needs three birds? You do. All right, swallow the birds. What, are you gonna keep them the rest of your life? Waste not, want not. That's what I always say.

[Ben Mandelker]

Here's a question. If a wolf comes across a bird in the forest, what's the wolf gonna do? The wolf's gonna eat the bird. Be the wolf, don't be the bird. Okay? Eat the bird. Then, you know, go take a somewhere. Because that's what the wolf is probably due afterwards. Then maybe take a nap. Wolf take naps. It's okay if you take a nap, you're a real man. You know, part of being in the light is fast. It fast forces your job, your progress in life. That's why wolves love light. Because wolves hang out in the light to fast forward their progress. It's obvious, guys, if a tree falls.

[Ronnie Karam]

In the forest and there's no one to hear it, then that tree sucked and it didn't deserve to be in there in the first place. That's why I say raise all the forest. All right? We need more paper in this world and less fucking iPads. Staring at your iPad so much is what causes blindness, not masturbation. Masturbate on a full flat land with no trees. That's what I always say.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. If a tree falls in a forest, does a wolf still do intermittent fasting if it doesn't feel well? Absolutely. You can't stop the wolf from changing its dietary routines. Fuck you, tree.

[Ronnie Karam]

This guy is such a fucking douchebag. And not only is he just but a regular douchebag, he's also just terrible at his job. I mean, as someone who's read a lot of self help books. Now listen, I'm not staying. I'm not saying they stuck, but I have read a lot of them and this is just so hack. He's like a self help book reader of like, I don't know, signs from a homegoods, you know, he's like live, laugh, love. That's what I always say, bro. Paris, Paris, Paris, Paris. Kitchen. It's like kitchen, bro, kitchen. This is the kitchen.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. This awful like manosphere that has like arisen in Our pop culture is just like. It's just like the worst thing of all time. And now you got all these guys who are trying to be like Joe Rogan or Joe Rogan's not even trying to be like this. I mean, I don't follow Joe Rogan closely, but this guy is just fully doing seminars, like Tom Cruise and Magnolia. But, like, it's all from this kind of like, Joe Rogan space of, like, bra. And it's the worst thing of all time, I have to say. It's.

[Ronnie Karam]

He sighs and he's like, hey, guys. Part of being in the light, it fast forces your progress in life. Being in the light. Being in the light is the last thing you need. Get a hat on. Okay. Your skin looks like a baseball glove.

[Ben Mandelker]

You're right, it does. Fast forward your. Your progress in life. Enjoy those Melanovas.

[Ronnie Karam]

So, and I also love people that are only successful from telling poorer people that they're successful. All of his success is based on just telling poor people that they're losers and they're dumb enough to pay him because he has, like, muscles and he's on a boat, you know? Stupid. Poor people. Stop it. Poor people. I'm never going to do this. You should. I say no to douchebags who are trying to tell you they can make you richer. Okay, you know what can make you richer? Jesus there.

[Ben Mandelker]

Jesus Eric Rock. Okay, so his Instagram has 5,000 followers. Okay, so that's. I wouldn't. You know, honestly, I would say that the average successful wolf that's leading a Zoom conference probably should have more than 5,000 followers.

[Ronnie Karam]

Wait, but they said on here that he had.

[Ben Mandelker]

Oh, wait, and there's also real Eric Rock. So he has two Instagram accounts. Maybe one's a backup. That one has 130,000 followers.

[Ronnie Karam]

There we go.

[Ben Mandelker]

Which is way more than what I have, for instance. But I feel like it's about 400,000 followers short of how many you need to be doing seminars and being like, I've found success. Because I think we all like. Like, if you're saying I found success, but you only have 130, 000 followers instead of 500, 000. I don't know, sir. I don't know if you found success. I think you've just. You found, like, a nice, nice amount. Nice amount. But, like, you. You need to have 500, 000 before you start talking like that. I'm sorry.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, here's his first post. Something big is coming. It's the Coeur d'alene Summit and then he has pictures of like famous football players and stuff. And he's like, so behind this event, the depth, meaning power and promise every speaker is bringing. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity. So seats will sell out. We're redefining success now. Success is 130,000 Instagram followers. Send me your money.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, his big speaker is Tim Tebow.

[Ronnie Karam]

When you get successful, right?

[Ben Mandelker]

Like, I mean he was successful, but he was also, I think like a little bit of a bust too. Like he came into the NFL with like a huge amount of hype and he got to the playoffs at one point. But like he was not, he was not what you would call like a legendary NFL player.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, here's what he. I guess he's extremely hot because I'm watching him right now, one of these Instagram videos.

[Ben Mandelker]

So hot.

[Ronnie Karam]

So let me tell you what he's doing in this video. He's wearing a skin tight black shirt, which I love, you know, with a gold chain over it, and he's yelling at a stadium full of people and he's got a big screen behind him with starving children in Africa and he's yelling at the audience. So if you guys don't want to be a starving child in Africa, go hear what Tim Tebow has to say because he's going to change it. Because then there's a shot of a Porsche and then there's Eric and a really bad toupee. So I don't know. I'm sold.

[Ben Mandelker]

Listen, listen. When a wolf, when a wolf is losing its hide, does it just walk around the forest without its hide? No. It finds another animal and puts the other animal's hide on its back. That's what a wolf does. So you know what? Stop shading my toupee. That's what a wolf would do.

[Ronnie Karam]

It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin's commercial.

[Eric Rock]

In the 1980s, a swept the country.

[Ben Mandelker]

Hey Mike, I really like this white Zinfandel. Well, good, good.

[Ronnie Karam]

Now put it down. We're gonna try another one.

[Eric Rock]

White Zin became America's top selling wine. But most don't know that this sweet drink has a sour history. What began in 1986 with counterfeit bottles.

[Ronnie Karam]

A big fraud, a multi million dollar.

[Eric Rock]

Fraud sent investigators chasing one of the most powerful families in the business, the Licciardis. But the closer the feds got to them, the more dangerous things became. It's a story of deceit.

[Ronnie Karam]

At the time, I was paranoid. Threats, you touch my kids, I will kill you and murder with a.22 caliber bullet to the head.

[Eric Rock]

What started with a scheme to mislabel wine spilled into a blood soaked battle for succession. Welcome to bloodvines. You can binge listen to Blood Vines exclusively and ad free on Wondery. Join Wondery in the Wondery app, Apple Podcasts, or Spotify.

[Monica Lewinsky]

At 24, I lost my narrative, or rather it was stolen from me. And the Monica Lewinsky that my friends and family knew was usurped by false narratives, callous jokes, and politics. I would define reclaiming as to take back what was yours. Something you possess is lost or stolen and ultimately you triumph in finding it again. So I think listeners can expect me to be chatting with folks both recognizable and unrecognizable names about the way that people have navigated roads to triumph. My hope is that people will finish an episode of Reclaiming and feel like they filled their tank up, they connected with the people that I'm talking to and leave with maybe some nuggets that help them feel a little more hopeful. Follow Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to Reclaiming early and ad free right now by joining Wondery in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts.

[Ronnie Karam]

So let's move on here. So his friend Victoria, fun of stupid Eric. I was looking at emails because I was wondering if we got an email from him.

[Ben Mandelker]

Oh my goodness. Victoria is his friend and she seems to be disenchanted with. With Eric. I feel like, I feel like Victoria was friends with Eric back in college or something and now I was like, why is my friend a douchebag now? Because she's talking to other people and she's like, well, you know, at the end of the day, we're all because of everything. You get nothing but nothing but, you know, we're all here because of Eric. And like, I feel like Eric, you know, I think, I guess it's more like I knew him more on a one on one basis and being with him in more of a group setting is different. He's. Is he always this douchey? I don't seem to remember him being this douchey. And Brittany, yeah, I don't like it.

[Ronnie Karam]

Thought you were done. So Brittany, who is, you know, one of the other guests and newer to new, new to the world of Eric Rock, I would assume, goes, you mean like confidence wise? And she goes, yeah. And I guess what I'm trying to say is how do I say cock sucking douchebag with Them. I don't know if it's a healthy confidence or if it's an overly cocky confidence. And he's still going on and on and on. And then it just cuts back to her and she goes like, really judgy. Yeah. So we cut back to Eric, and he's still on his laptop and he's wearing bracelets. You know, those Lance Armstrong one nut bracelets. He's wearing those. Except and say, instead of saying, live strong, they're like, no excuses. And then another one says, slay the dragon. I've never rooted for a dragon more in my life than I, I, I.

[Ben Mandelker]

Specifically, I'm going to encourage people to come up with excuses just, just to, just out of spite for this guy. All the excuses. I'm wearing a bracelet. If you have an excuse, just generate one. I will accept it right now. Just to counteract this guy's. And also, like, what a non creative or uncreative tagline. No excuses. You could do better than that, Eric. Come on now. And if you can't do better, then that's an excuse.

[Ronnie Karam]

Guys, you know what? You need to live. You need to breathe. All right, that'll be $5,000.

[Ben Mandelker]

So he has this wisdom to impart on his, his very sad followers. He's like, why do men suck at communication? It's hard for me to answer that question, man. Which is hilarious because you're charging for this. He's like, but naturally, men, historically in our DNA, are great communicators. Oh, we have. I'm Ronnie. Did you know that we actually have a gene that makes us good communicators? That's really good. Which is funny that it's hard for him to answer that question because he has a gene that makes him a good communicator. So I don't know.

[Ronnie Karam]

Do you know how you know how much you can communicate to someone by slapping them in the face with your dick? All right, that's what men have. That's what men.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

Do you feel like you're failing somewhere in life? Do you? Well, I can't really explain it.

[Ben Mandelker]

Listen, the only people that communicate better than men. Wolves. So then Captain Jason is like, all right, everyone beyond, we got scuba diving with the guests should be there within 20 minutes as soon as this ridiculous online seminar is over.

[Ronnie Karam]

So they're gonna get like, copy that. Yes, copy that. I've got a bracelet that says that, you know, if you see someone doing something right, cop that. No excuses. Take a breath.

[Ben Mandelker]

I want to introduce everyone on Zoom. I want to introduce you to my two new bracelets. On the left hand it says, see something? On the right hand it says, say something.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, man, I came out with a line of underwear that says terrorism sucks. Hey, guys, here's my advice. Don't be a terrorist, all right? And listen to my. Let's cut to a video of my friend Tebow. Tebow, what do you have to say? Don't be a starving child in Africa either. Nailed it. Tebow. That's why gets paid the big bucks. You think that gold necklace around his skin, tight white or a black shirt paid for itself? No.

[Ben Mandelker]

So then Zarina's like, tech crew, deck crew. Can I have some help with the plates, please? You know, in retrospect, Zarina should not have gone running to Jason. She should have said, oh, so you're going to quit? Great. Clean all my dishes. Like, she should have made his life torture for the rest of charter. Just. And anytime he piped up, she would say, not my problem. Not my. Not my circus, not my clowns, not my elephants, not my trapeze. Do the dishes.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, exactly. I think she should have done the same thing. I think just getting rid of him was a bad idea. And I don't know that it was necessarily her idea. I mean, that was Jason who did it. But I think she was looking more for like a friend to with. And here's another thing I'll say while I'm saying that. I think that the reason that Aisha needs to be on this show and not the other one is that she makes Captain Jason more fun. Like, she brings kind of a light hearted. She brings out his lighthearted nature where I think Serena brings out his scolding nature because she needs a little bit more. I think that he's more fun when Asia's here. There, I said it.

[Ben Mandelker]

I like his scolding nature. I like it when he scolds. I mean, I. I definitely loved that he basically kicked Anthony off the boat right then and there mid charter. That was like, great and wonderful. But I also worry that Anth, he didn't really realize that he had fucked up. You know, I think Anthony was like, great, I can get off this boat. It's like, no, you should be ashamed of yourself. Look at all these people you're letting down. You should be mortified. And so, like, I feel like it would have actually been, in retrospect, more effective to torture Anthony by making him do tons and tons of dishes for the next 36 hours.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. And speaking of men communicating, I would have rather a high. Oh, I'm your captain. And guess who you are. Nothing. All right? You're a underling. You're a sous chef. You work for Serena. Don't even look her in the eye. You're gonna do your dishes, and you're gonna do the crew food. I don't want to hear anything from you. And that's it. The end. Now go downstairs and do your job. I don't like letting him off the hook by just like, okay, you know, then you're. We're taking away two charters. I mean, I get the reasoning behind it, you know, and I'm not a captain for a very good reason. You want to talk about crashing into fucking docks? But, you know, I would rather see this man get yelled at.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, me too. So. And miserable. I want to see him miserable. So now, Captain. Captain. Jason is texting Harry. He's like, all right, Harry, I'm about to go diving. Hope you're okay. I'll say hi to the eel for you. And then in the kitchen, Johnny walks in and helps out with the dishes and stuff. And the women are cleaning up in the various rooms. And Lara is telling Marina to get into her wets because Marina's gonna go diving. Because as some people may remember, Vyon invited Marina to go on this dive without consulting Lara first. And now.

[Ronnie Karam]

Which Marina somehow took as hitting on her.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, Marina really was like, yeah, she. She. She saw a lot in this.

[Ronnie Karam]

Marina is now in love because someone let her go snorkeling. I mean, the woman doesn't ask for much. Okay. And it comes from a long line of below deck women. Not really much. I need you to ask for more. Okay. Below deck. So Lara. So, yeah. So Lara's telling us, yeah, you know, Van didn't ask me permission to take her. And that's absolute. I can't wait to say nothing about this.

[Ben Mandelker]

So we see flashbacks of that, and then Lara's like, now my hands are tied. If I take that away from her, I'm the bad guy. Thanks, Von. We'll be the bad guy. Come on. You're the. Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

I didn't hire you to be a good guy. I've hired you to make people iron beds. That's it.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

So, yeah, Brianna. Yeah. Brianna is like, did anyone hear from Harry? Did he talk about kissing me? How does he feel about it? Vion's like, not yet. I thought he would message you. She's like, oh, God, what did it. Oh, what did he say? I thought he would message you. Why was that funny? Enough thumbs.

[Ben Mandelker]

I don't I, I forget at the moment when I saw it, I got it. But then I. Now I don't remember why. Like why. And then I, I guess the moment. I guess that's because her. I guess he's implying that like Harry likes Brianna so he would text Brianna. I don't know. But either way goes. Haha. That took me a second ongoing motif.

[Ronnie Karam]

I'm gonna say the same thing I said on the mud racking boat. Okay.

[Ben Mandelker]

It took me. I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna say the same thing as I said when that couple tried to abduct me. Ha. Wait. Oh, I see. That took me a second. I'm abducted.

[Ronnie Karam]

All right, Nino, Nino, I've got to go diving. All right, you're in charge of the boat. You're in charge of the boat. And Nino's like, oh, hi, I'm the first officer also a. And, and a pizza chef and one letter away from Teresa's grandpa. So Brianna is texting Harry. She's like, I hope you get good news today. I hope I get good news too. Did you enjoy the kids?

[Ben Mandelker]

And the guests are gathering and some, some people who I guess did not go on the, on the excursion want some, some champagne etc or won some shots. And Laura's like, would you like some champagne as well? And they're like, yeah, I do. I'm like, okay. All right. They're, they're really excited. Eric is off the boat.

[Ronnie Karam]

So then Adair and Vyon are wiping down the deck and he hands her a towel. She goes, what is this? And he's like, it's dirty. She goes, okay, I'll wipe my butt with it now.

[Ben Mandelker]

So now Lara's talking to Tsarina about dinner and everything. And Zarina's like, I mean, I just have a lot of to do now. It's like I'm, I'm just a bit, bit behind with survival. And Lara's like, we'll make it work. And meanwhile, up on the scuba boat marine, they're all scuba diving. And Marina's saying like, what an amazing feeling. Like when I was young, my dad took me to go on scooping scuba diving trip and it was like an amazing experience and it changed my whole life. And I just felt like I was in space but underwater and with fish and nothing compares to it except for space, I guess. But I'm just so thankful to Von for giving me this opportunity.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, she's, she's putting too much into.

[Ben Mandelker]

She loves it. She loves it. She's having the best time I went.

[Ronnie Karam]

Scuba diving with my father, so it means something. So Harry's back. He's on the radio. He's like, crew, crew. I'm back, baby. Did you miss me? Yeah. And he's like, guess what? It's not fractured. The doctor says, just don't use the zone for the next few days. And guess I'm gonna have to do everything. One ended, eh?

[Ben Mandelker]

I feel like I'm pushed to the bench. But I got a text message from someone who said, I hope you get good news today. And I said, good news from the X ray and less pain today. Thanks for checking in.

[Ronnie Karam]

X.

[Ben Mandelker]

A little X in there just to make my intentions clear. Although now that I see it, it looks like I'm just referring back to the X ray. And I wonder if she's saying maybe she thinks I just either kissed a manta ray or I'm being flirty with her. I'm not sure. Maybe that text didn't land properly.

[Ronnie Karam]

I mean, I wouldn't sign things X to somebody I like. They're just gonna leave you for another platform. So Harry is checking in with Johnny, and he's updating him and about the douchebag, the other douchebag, the skinny little douchebag leaving the sous chef. And now Adair's vacuuming. And let's see, he. Harry goes in to check with Serena, and it's like, I was so worried about you. It's like, don't worry. Everything's fine. I.

[Ben Mandelker]

What's that mean? Eggs. Not following.

[Ronnie Karam]

Eeks.

[Ben Mandelker]

Eggs? You want eggs? Is that what you're saying? I can't, Harry. I'm afraid you have to speak more plain English for me.

[Ronnie Karam]

So then Van checks with him, and Harry's like, oh, it's not broken. She doesn't want me to use this hand, though. And this. This can't get wet, so I'm going to do. Only requires one hand. And he's like, great, welcome back.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well. Oh, okay. So beyond's like, well, I'm quite relieved. But he can't. He can't do diving excursions. He cannot do water sports. And. And this is what this charter vest is all about. So we're in a very tough position, but we're going to have to make it work. I mean, why doesn't Harry just do the stuff that Marina can't do right now since Marina's off with the. With the eels and the.

[Ronnie Karam]

I think that's what they're moving him into, because when he talks to the captain, the captain's like, have Fun making beds or whatever. So then Lara is like, well, you can make beds with one hand. And he's like, I think today I'll rest. No, I think you've already been at the hospital. That's a rest. Get to work.

[Ben Mandelker]

So now the guests are done. If you got time to have a broken thumb, you got time to get stuff done.

[Ronnie Karam]

If you got time to throb, you got time to polish this knob. Oh, wait, I've just been reported to hr. Okay, that's not good management.

[Ben Mandelker]

If you got time to. To be in pain, you got time to clean this window pane. Technically different. Two different words. So the rhyme counts. So the swimmers are. The scuba people are done scuba diving. They're back getting back on their boat. They had a great time. And then Brianna's talking to Lara and she's like, do you think that Harry meant to kiss me? I'm so confused by it. I mean, he sent me an X, but then I was like, did he mean to say more? Was he gonna talk about the X Files? I didn't really like that show. And Laura's like, well, of course he did. He's obsessed with you. It's like, really? Huh? Sure, I could solve my own problem and talk to Harry about the kiss. But Harry kissed me. He can say something to me about it.

[Ronnie Karam]

Why do you have to talk about it? I've gotten full on blowjobs that I haven't talked about. After her, what's to talk about? He kissed you. The kissing was the talk. Seriously, we have to have a full on discussion about everything? Yeah, he kissed you. What's the discussion? I just don't understand. So Laura's like, well, I need to step in at some point. I think I need these baby giraffes. If Beon doesn't send them scuba diving, that is. So now Harry goes to bed and the guests are coming back, back. And Captain still hasn't heard from Harry. So he's like, what the hell? And he finds out he's in the cabin. Meanwhile, Captain Jason is invited by Randy to come to dinner tonight. Serena's first dinner solo.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. So Lara, they're gonna. Tonight's gonna be Casino Night. So Laura's saying because it's Casino Night, she wants all the boys to wear bow ties and feel like, you know, she's like, I feel like it needs to be black T, like Monte Carlo. Which is funny because they're all come out like shirtless, I think, right? Aren't they like shirtless and black tie? Which is kind of funny for this group, this group of, like, super heterosexual men.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Monte Carlo is. Do they do that there? I mean, I don't know. I feel like that's Chippendales.

[Ben Mandelker]

Does it. Chippendales. Were they shirtless? In my mind, they were shirtless. Maybe they weren't shirtless at all. Maybe I just saw the bow tie and I just saw torsos in my mind. Were they sure?

[Ronnie Karam]

No, they were shirtless. Yeah. The boys here, they were shirtless. Yeah. Because when came out, I was like, wow, a string bean and a bow tie feels like Monte Carlo.

[Ben Mandelker]

Eric is like, these guys all have good bodies. But they didn't take my seminar. How is this possible?

[Ronnie Karam]

So Eric's like, wait a minute, you all work out every day. So who told you? No excuses.

[Ben Mandelker]

So Laura's asking Serena what the. The. The menu is for tonight for Casino Night, no less. And so Zarina's like, so it'll be a mini French onion soup. Soup with truffle, grilled cheese, and then steak. It's, you know, very knife and fork. It's like, all right, knife and fork, but there's a soup in there. Tsarina. This was an odd. Seems to be a low key, ongoing issue. Like, she's. Tsarina is very reluctant to pull the trigger on spoons. She's like, well, it's a soup, but I did put a sandwich in there. So let's just go fork and knife only. Fork and knife only. I just. I'm sorry, we can't do the spoons. It's too early, too early in the season to start putting out the spoons.

[Ronnie Karam]

Have you ever seen someone this obsessed with soup? Soup? I've never seen someone serve more soup on the show. I mean, soup's fine. I'm not, you know, I'm not dissing soup as a. As a old one. But why. Why so many? She'll serve two or three in one. One meal. She loves a soup. Does she? Do you think she has digestion problems? I think she has digestion problems.

[Ben Mandelker]

She loves making soup. She loves it. She does love it. I think, though. Though this entire season has been people just sweating and little things on the side of the screen that says it's 145hu and 3,000 degrees out. So naturally, French onion soup. What a perfect time to serve it.

[Ronnie Karam]

With a sandwich right in the middle of it.

[Ben Mandelker]

A heavy, cheesy sandwich right in the middle of it. Who doesn't love that?

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. And so finally she's like, oh, my God, I've got so many Grilled cheeses to make. Did I fuck up by getting rid of my sous chef?

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

But also, grilled cheese is, like, the easiest thing you could be making right now, so. And I really like Serena. I know. I feel like I'm being really hard on Serena, but I really like her. I just don't know what she's up to right now. It's hard to figure out.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, she's really losing the thread, so she's like, I'm losing. I'm running out of time. And she's like, fuck me. This is already such a big add on to the anxiety and that I already have going on right now. Did I totally fuck up by losing my sous chef mid charter? You did, because you could have tortured him instead. It was a big mistake.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

Can you hear my chair, by the way? I have a question. Do you hear my chair? My chair makes so much noise. This is a new, newer chair I bought at, like, two months ago, and it's very creaky. Does. Do you hear it on the podcast?

[Ronnie Karam]

No, I don't.

[Ben Mandelker]

You don't hear it any of this?

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, I do. When you're quiet and you do it like all this. Yeah, Yeah, I hear that. Yeah, I hear that.

[Ben Mandelker]

I don't know how to fix it. Anyone has ideas, like, if anyone has ideas to make a chair less creaky, please let me know. Thank you.

[Ronnie Karam]

I thought losing weight would help, but it didn't. My chair still creek, and then you're thin and your chair still creeks, so I guess it's nothing like you think losing weight's going to, like, help in so many ways that it just doesn't. That's it. I was like, God, I'm going to be married and be happy and I'm going to have so much money and, like, I'm going to smile so much. It didn't work. None of that worked. Okay. But I can't fit in a plane seat better, so that's good, that's good, that's good.

[Ben Mandelker]

So, honestly, though, Ronnie, I'd rather. No excuses, bro. No excuses.

[Ronnie Karam]

No excuses, bro.

[Ben Mandelker]

Slay the dragon. So Captain Shelly T. X with a whole bunch of cvs, she's like, here you go. Here's a bunch of cvs. Now get out of my face. Here, kimono, sexy man. And drag him. I'll take that kimono and I'll gag you in the mouth with it and do all sorts of things with the old body. Be careful how.

[Ronnie Karam]

Hi, this is Shelly. I've got some CVS for you also. I've got a meeting request for time to watch you try on kimono.

[Ben Mandelker]

Here's some CVs as in you can see my V if you catch my drift.

[Victoria]

Imagine this. You help your little brother land a great job abroad. But when he arrives, the job doesn't exist. Instead, he's trapped in a heavily guarded compound, forced to sit at a computer and scam innocent victims. All while armed guards stand by with shoot to kill orders. Scam Factory, the explosive new true crime podcast from Wondery, exposes a multi billion dollar criminal empire operating in plain sight. Told through one family's harrowing account of sleepless nights, desperate phone calls and dangerous rescue attempts, Scam Factory reveals a brutal truth. The only way out is to scam their way out. Follow Scam Factory on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of Scam Factory early and ad free right now by joining Wondery Plus.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Harry finally comes in to talk to the captain. He's like, guess what? It's not fractured. The doctor just said don't do anything on a boat. And he's like, great. Well, let's find some things you can do. Maybe in the galley making beds. You know, things that will make me not fire you. He's like, right, got it, got it.

[Ben Mandelker]

You know, maybe one thing you can do is, I don't know, talk with Brianna about that kiss. She seems to be bothering everyone about it. She seemed to pestering the kiss. Could you just of tie that one off? Thank you.

[Ronnie Karam]

So now we get one of my favorite things in Below Deck where it's like the truth behind the artist. So Lara is doing a Monte Carlo night and she's like, it's Monte Carlo. It's black dye themed dinner. My creativity, my creativity definitely comes from my mom. She's very good at art, Art school, drama, that kind of area. I just loved all of that stuff. Which has led me to rolling napkins with coins around napkin rings. I mean, I'm basically the Picasso of my neighborhood these days. Mom is so proud.

[Ben Mandelker]

I know that feeling of when you put on the perfect theme, that feeling of just knowing that you've done it. It's a very close second to sex. That's why I always orgasm whenever I put up a black balloon on casino night. Oh yes, unwrapping.

[Ronnie Karam]

Just imagine this. You're unwrapping something flat and then you grab both ends of it and pull them towards you. Just pull it and it unfolds into a giant 3D strawberry. Now that Is just like sex.

[Ben Mandelker]

Look. Have you ever.

[Ronnie Karam]

They show her. She's like, what I do is art. And then they start showing pictures, and it's like those paper decorations hanging from ceilings. Yes. Wow. You really big Lots it out. Congratulations.

[Ben Mandelker]

Let me tell you something. Nothing gets me wetter than putting up streamers. Also, like, we have a real decline in our below deck trauma backstories because, like, a few weeks ago, as Marina saying, my grandmother paid for everything she had to do. Everything. She worked. She worked her entire life, so that way all 15 of her. Her children could have a life to live. And then this. Today, it's like, my mother loved art. Art. So I love art.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, and also Marina, she's like, I love scuba diving because my dad took me. I'm like, hello, none of you are up enough to be on this show.

[Ben Mandelker]

I know. Can we please, like, we need to, like, go back to the heydays of the last season of Blow Deck down under when you had Adam, who was like, my mom. I just want to buy a house for my mother. You're like, okay, relax. He's like, oh, my. I was. I raised all my brothers. I raised them all. I was like a father to my brothers. It's like, we need some. We need some melodrama, you know?

[Ronnie Karam]

I need children who have been left behind. We don't even have a guy with bad tattoos this season, do we? I think everybody is like, tattoo free and kind of like, it's weird. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know if Disneyland started casting this, but, you guys, I need some trauma. I need some drug addiction. I need some abandoned children. I need some dead parents. Step that. Come on.

[Ben Mandelker]

Also, did you know that I think. Oh, no. For a moment, I thought that Gail and Nathan got married from below deck down on. I mean, met. But maybe they're just. They're still just dating. Hot and heavy. Someone made it. Someone online. It seemed like they got married, but they're not married at all.

[Ronnie Karam]

Someone just had a baby in the below deck world too.

[Ben Mandelker]

But I don't.

[Ronnie Karam]

I don't know. I scrap. I. I scrub their names out of my memory below. They're out of my dvr. Once the. Once the season's over, there's too much ballistic deck. But somebody did.

[Ben Mandelker]

I was like, wow, someone. Someone must have had. Someone had a baby somewhere along the way, whatever. But you know what? The point is bad tattoos. We don't have a lot of them this season. The other point is. Yeah, more trauma. Like, I Mean, Gail had a really good one. Gail's was. She was always trying to impress her dad, and that's why one day, she dropped an anchor on her foot. So, you know. Right. Wasn't that her thing?

[Ronnie Karam]

I forgot Gail. I don't remember her.

[Ben Mandelker]

She was, like, super, super hot, and. But she was, like. She was dead. It doesn't. You know, Honestly, I don't even care. People will look just when you look. Google her.

[Ronnie Karam]

It's G, A, E L. Ben, do me a favor. No excuses.

[Ben Mandelker]

Slay the dragon, bro. Slay that dragon. Oh, yeah. Your mom loved art. Slay that art dragon, bro.

[Ronnie Karam]

Stay the mom dragon. So Serena is radioing for people to wash her kitchen, and then Harry is going into the kitchen. There's a big mess, and he's like, oh, my God. Hell, this is messy. Anthony wasn't lying about this. Excuse me. You started some of this drama, sir.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

Last week. So don't you complain. Enjoy. Enjoy the. Enjoy. Enjoy the. The. The weeds that you sowed.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. So then Zarina is getting her grilled cheeses ready, and she's like, casino Royale, to me is elegant. It's refined. It's grilled cheeses submerged in soup. Soup that'll make you have stinky thoughts for the next 18 hours. So it's drinking champagne in the French Riviera. It's eating heavy, heavy, hot soup with oodles of melted cheese in it and bread and onions, more onions than you can ever imagine. That's sophistication. That's the French Riviera.

[Ronnie Karam]

I'm not just serving grilled cheese. Cheese. I'm serving grilled cheese without crust.

[Ben Mandelker]

Elegant Monaco.

[Ronnie Karam]

So at the table, they're like, oh, my God, it's so hot. Why is it so hot out here? And Jason comes to the table, and the French onion soup is served with the toasties in the middle, and everybody just stares at it. And she and Lara's like, oh, God. Onion soup is not pretty. Let's be honest. I mean, some chefs get defensive about their food and Serena as insane. So I'm not really sure what to do, but I can't wait to say nothing about this.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. And on top of that, these guests have been. They are not touching carbs. I mean, Eric, he was like, I'll have a latte, but not as long as it's not more than 30 calories. So, like, this is their worst nightmare. So of course, they are staring, and they, like, don't know what to do with it. And it's also hot as no one.

[Ronnie Karam]

Wants the guys soup. One of the guys is like, is that a cheese sandwich and soup? She's like, it is. It's a French onion soup with truffle parmesan toasties. And he's like, oh, God, I can feel the sweat going down my spine. And another one's like, yeah, it's pretty heavy. And the main guy is like, this shit's so heavy, I would never even let it in one of my seminars. Hey, could someone give this super bracelet? It says loot some wait.

[Ben Mandelker]

Slay the dragon. Slay the onion. So then Lara's assigning people to go clean up cabins and stuff. And then Von is. He's shirtless with a bow tie on, and he's bringing Zarina some sort of can. And they, like, open it together and they giggle. And, you know, he's like, hot. And she's like, he's being flirty, you know, because he's checking out. Like, you know, as long as I didn't get Brianna, who's my next, was my next option. So Zarina is like, you know, she gets. She gets really. She gets really, I guess you could say motivated. She gets horny. She's horny when. When guys come into her galley, she gets horned up. We saw this all last season when Clover kept going into her galley to eat snacks, and she was like, oh, I got this muscly man coming in to eat celery sticks. It's just a little bit hot. The flirtation's a bit hot. It's like, they just want their food.

[Ronnie Karam]

I get it. She's stuck in a galley all day. She doesn't get to, like, co. Mingle with everybody like everybody else. I mean, it's like, me, I don't do any commingling, and I have a task rabbit coming today. And I shaved my nuts. Like, is it sad? Yes. Is it logical? It's completely not. I'm not gonna do anything with the task rabbit, but I found a hot task rabbit. At least his picture says he's hot. And you know what? That's it. I took a shower just in case. I deodorized. I'm wearing completely clean clothes, clean underwear. I mean, it's crazy over here.

[Ben Mandelker]

So you're getting ready.

[Ronnie Karam]

Gonna show up. I'm gonna have a tie on. Gonna be like, hello, come in, please. Would you like to sit down? Need any dinner?

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, you never know what m. You always be prepared, you know, so. So Van's like, oh, you've really outdone yourself. And he. She's like, well, I don't think so, honey, but that's very sweet of you to say so. We should probably get married soon. He's like, can I. Snacks. Yes. So meanwhile, she's going to be serving up filet mignon, carrot puree, red wine, and a Parmesan crisp.

[Ronnie Karam]

And so now dinner is served. And douchebags over there, like, yeah, millennials, like, we had to work hard. What the are you talking about? People have been complaining about millennials for three decades, sir.

[Ben Mandelker]

Where'd this come from? You don't get to steal, like, the Gen X. Like, this is like, Gen X is having the we worked hard moment. I mean, listen, you don't get to say that we were hard until you're at, like, at least 50. Which is why all the Gen Xers are doing this now. But. But as a millennial, like, no, Gen.

[Ronnie Karam]

Xers are ridiculous too. And we know it because we had whole movies made about how lazy we are. Well, I'm a Gen Xer. You're a. You're a millennial. Right. But Gen X was, like, had the whole movies, like, reality bites about how lazy we are and how we are. Yeah. And now we're like, we had to do everything ourselves if we're full of. And so are millennials. I think it's just nature where young people are like, old people suck and they smell. And old kids, we had to work hard in our day. It's all a lie. Humanity is known for being fairly lazy and good for nothings until we're too old to actually do anything. And then we complain that we worked harder than anybody else.

[Ben Mandelker]

This is. This is just an example of someone trying to put some space between him and Jen Z. Right. Because Jen Z is currently. They're the punching bag for a laziest. So he's like, guys, millennials, we had to work hard. You know, like, the kids that are growing up now, now they're weak. Those are weak kids. Yeah. So then someone goes, yeah, yeah, because you know what? You're in an alpha list, just testosterone list. Society of weak men. Except for these boys.

[Ronnie Karam]

Oh, God, what douchebags. So then, you know, they're complimenting each other. They're like, yeah, you guys look good. At least. At least the staff looks good. So then someone's like, looks like that steak has an AU on it. She goes, yeah, it's carrot puree and Parmesan crisp. Like, you've ruined our only protein with sugar and Parmesan.

[Ben Mandelker]

Did you put some OU on this? I love putting. You put OU on This. I don't know why that's so fun to me. There's some ou. I think that the O is like the. The au part is like a. It's like it's served ou, but like, it's jus. That's on it, not ou. Did you put some ou? It's like saying, did you put some. Did you put some on top? So, sauce, one of.

[Ronnie Karam]

One of the guys. Yeah, I call it on top sauce, cuz that's what I am.

[Ben Mandelker]

On top. No excuses.

[Ronnie Karam]

But one of the guys is like, yeah. This generation, all they're obsessed with is fame. Can you imagine living a life where all you care about is money and celebrity? And one of the friends goes, yeah, that's just disgusting. Okay? People who just paid to be on a boat so you could increase your celebrity. You are so. You're such a hypocrite. Secret.

[Ben Mandelker]

No, no, it's more than that. Well, he says it's more than just that he paid to be on a boat. He has a videographer who is hired to trail him at any single thing he does. Like, get my calves, bro. Get my calves coming up the stairs. Get my calves. And then he's saying, like, yeah, man. The pursuit of money and fame is the 12 lowest vibrating forms of energy. No wolf wants that. A wolf already is famous in his own heart.

[Ronnie Karam]

Such low vibrations, bruh. So Captain Jason is not impressed with these people or this dinner. He's like, you know, 10 out of 10 is flavor presentation, you know, gold kimono. But this was a better s out of 10. I mean, we hit some points. You know, the guests seem happy. They also seem completely ridiculous, but they're happy. And I know it's a tough time for Serena, but the food has still got to be 100. You know, I need Serena's food to be as good as she is crazy.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. So everyone takes a photo, and then everyone's gonna wake up at like 5:45am and so Tsarina's asking, like, if the guests were happy. And Captain Jason's like, well, you know, they're all very fitness oriented, so they're not eating a lot of carbs. And the soup was just, like, big. Just a big bowl of bread. Bread with soup in it. You know, it's just like, a lot. So read the room, read the preference sheets. If a douchebag comes on, just see what. What a douchebag would want to eat and think about that. Okay, so, yeah, it was bad.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. I mean, it's like, yeah. And the filet Mignon should have been seared. And she's like, I tried to sear it. And he goes, you couldn't get it hot enough. She goes, no, I mean it gets hot. It's just I didn't want to burn it, you know. And he's like, okay, well, we're gonna have to fight through these hiccups. I think it's very natural that a five star chef doesn't know how to sear a filet mignon. So that's something I can work with, thankfully.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. See the other thing, when you get rid of Anthony, Zarina, now all of your flaws are on display. And the fact that you said you were afraid of burning the steak, that's really bad if you're a professional chef. If you don't, if you don't understand how to sear versus burn.

[Ronnie Karam]

Oh my God. It's just rough because, you know, I mean, first I had Anthony in here questioning my food and now I've got him in here questioning my food and oh, well, then make less questionable food. And I'm not saying that that's okay for Anthony. You should just told Anthony to shut up.

[Ben Mandelker]

But yeah, exactly. So now it's 10, 10:23pm And Brianna and Harry are in a break room and he's like, do you need a hand? She goes, literally one hand. It's like, oh, yeah, I get that. All right. Excited for tomorrow night? Last time was fun. I enjoyed it. She's like, yeah, I had a great time. Yeah, I liked it. I'm not sure if you did as well. She goes, yeah, you did. Oh, I did. Are we talking about the kiss? Cuz I've been wondering, are we going to talk about the kiss at some point? I like the kiss. Are we talking about the kiss? Right? Yeah, the kiss. Yeah. Who's great? Would you like to do something on tune of a day? Like maybe go on a diet, something like that, you know? And she's basically. They flirt and he kisses her again.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. She's like, oh my God, thank God. I thought he was ghosting me. Oh God. Thanks for your offer of one hand.

[Ben Mandelker]

So then they're actually kind of perfect together. They are. And Brianna tells Lara and Lara's like, get over here, my little baby giraffes. God. I'm gonna really, really try to push that baby giraffe angle for a little while here, see if it catches on.

[Ronnie Karam]

I feel like they're really perfect together. But I also feel like if they were like pioneer people in Lonesome Dove, they'd be the first people killed, probably they'd be like robbed and killed, like in, within.

[Ben Mandelker]

Because they'll be.

[Ronnie Karam]

Because we're always like goofily smiling. It's like when I went into that liquor street liquor store down the street from my place in LA that I lived for years. I went in, there was always this Russian guy who worked there. And one day he's like, listen, I like you, but please let me give you advice. This thing you do. I said, what? He goes, with your mouth. I was like, smile. He goes, yes, stop that. And I said, why? I'm just being friendly. And he's like, don't do it. Where I come from, it makes you stupid. I said, what do you mean to me? Like stupid? Like I don't study because I smile. He's like, no, you know, special stupid. I'm like, oh, okay, I'm an asshole stupid. But it's always kind of stuck with you. I still do it, you know, I still walk in everywhere like, hi, how are you? But I've always thought about it and I think about it when I see these two together and I'm like, I'm going to rob them. Even I would rob them. I would push them down to the street and rob them.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, you know why? You know why you do that? Because we live in a society of weak, testosterone less men who could be taken. Where are the alphas?

[Ronnie Karam]

Where have all the alphas gone?

[Ben Mandelker]

He'll find out where all the alphas are are when he winds up eventually being convicted of fraud and sent to jail. And then he'll probably be dealing with some alphas up his bum hole. So it's, I mean, let's not, let's. But the jail thing, we all know, we all know that's his trajectory in life, that this is fraud happening here, right? This guy's going to jail. He'll be in jail soon. You just wait. You just wait and watch. Then he can really talk about slaying dragons. So he probably listens to Imagine Dragons. He probably, you know that probably so many of his videos have like imagine dragons playing in the background. You know all those Imagine Dragon songs. They bang a big drum and they're like. So anyway, they probably special.

[Ronnie Karam]

They've probably got special security at their concerts. Somebody's threatening to slay us again. The Alpha's here.

[Ben Mandelker]

Didn't they know there's no dragon here? We just told them to imagine them.

[Ronnie Karam]

Congratulations, you've reached the end of part one. Of a two part recap for part two. Go look for the Recap that says is part two. See you over there, suckers.

[Ben Mandelker]

Watch what happens. Would like to thank its premium sponsors Ain't no thing like Allison King Our.

[Ronnie Karam]

Way is the Amber way It's the.

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Foster and the Furious It's Amanda Foster it's always automatic with Ashley Auto Ashley.

[Ronnie Karam]

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Your hands together for Carly Clap. Catherine D. Bernardo has our hearto get.

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[Ronnie Karam]

All go for Hugo Hava Nagila Weber.

[Ben Mandelker]

We could all learn from Jennifer Kearns.

[Ronnie Karam]

She'S our kind of mess It's Jennifer Messer Sip some scotch with Jessica Trotch.

[Ben Mandelker]

Knock, knock, knocking on Katie Manock's door She's our favorite streamer Caroline Peacock, Kristen.

[Ronnie Karam]

The Piston Anderson Get a bee in your bonnet With Lacey B.

[Ben Mandelker]

Ringing the funk It's Leslie Plunkett she.

[Ronnie Karam]

Gets a name from us It's Lindsey D. Let's give a Kisserino to Lisalino Fresh as a daisy It's Maisie McHenry we love her on the rocks It's Melissa Cox Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the.

[Ben Mandelker]

Berg this is Living with Michelle Vivian.

[Ronnie Karam]

I love a YA Olivia Williamson Tastier than Flanderson It's Rachel Manderson she sure.

[Ben Mandelker]

Is swell It's Raquel, yes, we canna It's Savannah Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman let's share with Sharon Eldridge the.

[Ronnie Karam]

Bay Area and our super Premium sponsors she's VVIP it's Amanda V. Somebody get.

[Ben Mandelker]

Us 10cc's of Betsy MD she's got a leg up it's Beth Ani we're.

[Ronnie Karam]

Taking the gold With Brenda Silva let's.

[Ben Mandelker]

Get real with Caitlin O'Neal don't get.

[Ronnie Karam]

Salty With Christine Pepper can't have a meal without the Emily sides who, what, why, where? And Gwen Pentland it's our queen It's.

[Ben Mandelker]

Queen Laifa Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall know your worth With Jason Kurth we got our wish It's Jen Plish she's not harsh She's Jill Hirsch She's a little bit loony Juni, my Favorite Murdo Karen McMurdo we love him madly It's Kyle Pod Shadley, we're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Baron She's a whiz. It's Liz Sarthi, always killing it.

[Ronnie Karam]

It's Lola Al Kalani, the incredible edible Matthew sisters She eases our woes. It's Melissa St. Rose Give him hell.

[Ben Mandelker]

Ms. Noel, she's the queen bee. It's Sarah Lemke Shannon out of a cannon Anthony let's take off with Tamla.

[Ronnie Karam]

Playing She ain't no shrinking violet Cootar we love you guys. If you like, watch what crappens. You can listen ad free right now by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short [e-mail] survey.