#2755 Southern Charm S10E13: Dunce On This Island

Summary

Watch What Crappens Podcast Summary: Episode #2755 Southern Charm S10E13 – “Dunce On This Island”

Release Date: March 7, 2025

Introduction

In Episode #2755 of Watch What Crappens, hosts Ben Mandelker and Ronnie Karam delve into the dramatic events of Season 10, Episode 13 of Southern Charm, aptly titled “Dunce On This Island.” This episode explores the tumultuous dynamics among the cast members, focusing on Shep and Sienna’s strained relationship and Craig’s ongoing personal struggles. Ben and Ronnie provide sharp, humorous commentary while unpacking the intricate storylines and character developments that unfolded on the show.

Main Plot Summary

The episode centers around a tense dinner event orchestrated by Shep, aiming to mend his relationship with Sienna. However, the evening quickly devolves into chaos due to Craig’s disruptive behavior and underlying tensions within the group.

• Shep and Sienna’s Conflict: Shep is desperate to solidify his relationship with Sienna, presenting himself as a loving and reliable partner. Sienna, however, remains uncertain about their bond, leading to a heated exchange during dinner.

• Craig’s Antics: Craig’s attempt to gift Sienna a megalodon necklace backfires, highlighting his inability to read social cues and manage his emotions. His belligerent behavior exacerbates the situation, causing friction among the group.

• Friendship Dynamics: The tension between Craig and Austin becomes a focal point, revealing deeper issues related to addiction and personal growth. Their conversation underscores the complexities of maintaining friendships amidst personal struggles.

Character Discussions

Ben and Ronnie dissect the characters’ motivations and actions, providing insightful and often comedic analysis.

• Craig’s Hypocrisy and Struggles: Ben criticizes Craig’s hypocrisy, especially regarding his alcoholism storyline. At [05:50], Ben remarks, “You’re doing great over there, Craig. He’s like, I’m just trying not to be an alcoholic.” This highlights Craig’s conflicting behavior—publicly addressing alcoholism while privately indulging in it.

• Shep’s Vulnerability: Ronnie emphasizes Shep’s genuine affection for Sienna, contrasting it with Craig’s superficial antics. At [08:07], Ronnie comments, “Shep is trying to get led on. So what’s the point of having her at dinner?” illustrating Shep’s naivety and emotional investment.

• Sienna’s Poise Amidst Chaos: Sienna’s composed demeanor during the dinner is praised, showcasing her ability to handle Craig’s disruptions gracefully. Ronnie notes at [19:48], “She’s trying to hold her hand, and she won’t hold his hand. Good for her,” highlighting Sienna’s strength.

• Friendship Tensions: The hosts explore the strained relationship between Craig and Austin, touching upon themes of honesty, tough love, and the impact of addiction. At [66:59], Ben confesses, “I was team Craig for that, but Craig still acts like a little beyond that,” revealing his conflicted stance on Craig’s behavior.

Key Moments

Several pivotal scenes from the episode are highlighted and analyzed:

• Dinner Disaster: The dinner intended to mend relationships turns sour as Craig’s inappropriate gifting and drunken demeanor overshadow Shep and Sienna’s attempts at reconciliation. Ben humorously notes Craig’s over-the-top behavior at [08:07], “Craig is in full on belligerent, drunk Craig mode this whole episode.”

• Emotional Exchanges: The heartfelt conversation between Craig and Austin offers a glimpse into their friendship struggles. Ronnie summarizes this at [68:59], “They did actually have some moments that felt introspective and insightful,” acknowledging the depth beneath their abrasive interactions.

• Vanita’s Revelation: Vanita’s Instagram post challenges the narrative portrayed on the show, revealing behind-the-scenes tensions and misunderstandings. This moment underscores the complexities of reality TV editing and character portrayal.

Insights and Conclusions

Ben and Ronnie encapsulate the episode’s themes, emphasizing the blend of humor and drama that defines Southern Charm. They reflect on the characters’ growth and the ongoing challenges they face.

• Authenticity vs. Image: A recurring theme is the tension between authenticity and the curated images the characters project. Craig’s struggle to maintain a “Martha Stewart of the South” persona while grappling with personal demons is a focal point.

• Friendship and Support: The episode underscores the importance of genuine support among friends, especially when dealing with personal issues like addiction. Austin’s role as a supportive friend to Craig, despite Craig’s flaws, is highlighted as a positive dynamic.

• Navigating Relationships: Shep and Sienna’s relationship serves as a microcosm of the broader challenges faced by the cast—balancing personal desires with group expectations and external pressures.

Notable Quotes

Throughout the episode, Ben and Ronnie interject memorable quotes that encapsulate their perspectives:

• Ben Mandelker at [05:50]: “You’re doing great over there, Craig. He’s like, I’m just trying not to be an alcoholic.”

• Ronnie Karam at [08:07]: “Shep is trying to get led on. So what’s the point of having her at dinner?”

• Ben Mandelker at [19:48]: “She’s trying to hold her hand, and she won’t hold his hand. Good for her.”

• Ronnie Karam at [66:59]: “They did actually have some moments that felt introspective and insightful.”

• Ben Mandelker at [68:59]: “I think that's a good thing.”

Final Thoughts

Episode #2755 of Watch What Crappens offers a comprehensive and entertaining analysis of a pivotal episode of Southern Charm. Ben Mandelker and Ronnie Karam skillfully navigate the intricacies of the show’s drama, providing listeners with both insightful commentary and humorous takeaways. Their balanced approach makes the episode accessible and engaging, whether you’re a seasoned fan or new to the world of Bravo reality shows.

Support and Further Engagement

For listeners eager to dive deeper, Ben and Ronnie invite support through their Patreon page, offering bonus episodes, video recaps, and exclusive Discord access. Additionally, live shows in Cincinnati, Minneapolis, and Toronto are announced, promising more dynamic discussions and interactions with the hosts.

Stay Connected

You can listen to Watch What Crappens on the Wondery App or wherever you get your podcasts. For an ad-free experience and exclusive content, consider joining Wondery+ through the Wondery App, Apple Podcasts, or Spotify.

Transcript

[Ben Mandelker]

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[Ronnie Karam]

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[Ben Mandelker]

Listening on Audible can help you reach the goals you set for yourself. It's a great partner to help you become your best self. One of my personal favorites is an oldie. It's called Alex As a Man thinketh. It's a really good one I was given as a kid and just listening to it as I go for my walk really helps me out with the day.

[Ronnie Karam]

Start listening today. Go to audible.com crappins and sign up for a free 30 day trial. That's audible.com crappins if you're looking for.

[Ben Mandelker]

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[Ronnie Karam]

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[Ben Mandelker]

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[Ronnie Karam]

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[Ben Mandelker]

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[Ronnie Karam]

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[Ben Mandelker]

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[Ronnie Karam]

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[Ben Mandelker]

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[Ronnie Karam]

What happens when there's so much there's so much that happens. Hello and welcome to Watch what Crappens, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker. And joining me today, the one, the only, Ronnie Caram. Hey, Ronnie, how's it going?

[Ben Mandelker]

Hey, what's going on, baby?

[Ronnie Karam]

You know, just, it's Friday. We made it to the end of the week. So excited. And one week from today, our live shows are resuming in Cincinnati. We're doing Cincinnati, Minneapolis and Toronto all next weekend, which is really wild when you think about it. So Cincinnati, we're going to be doing Summer House. And then Minneapolis, we're gonna do Southern Charm. And in Toronto, we're doing a classic classic, Real Housewives Ron Season 8, episode 9. It's the famous Berkshire's episode December, Berkshire's County. You know the episode, we're recapping it. That's gonna be hilarious and it's gonna be wild. So looking forward to that. Go to watch for crappens.com to get your tickets and also be sure to join up on Patreon patreon.com Watch for crappins. You get access to crappies on demand where you can watch us not just listen. Also, we have a weekly bonus episode, Traders finale. I hope you watched last night. We're talking Traders finale finale this week and we'll talk about the reunion next week. And of course, in case you missed the news, Apple has levied an Apple tax on their apps, which means that if you sign up for Patreon through the Patreon app that you got from the Apple store, you're gonna have to pay a surcharge. However, if you just sign up through Patreon by just going through your browser or just going to www. Patreon.com watch crappens. You don't have to pay that surcharge. So don't pay a surcharge that you don't have to. So go directly on your browser. If you are already a subscriber. This does not affect you. It's only if you are new and. Or thinking about joining. Even if you're thinking about. Did you know that if you think about things, Apple will tax you. It's wild. But if you're new, just there. Yeah. Honestly. So don't. Don't do it through the app. Do it through the. And that's all right with this.

[Ben Mandelker]

Shall we? Southern charm. We're still on vacation and Shep is still trying to convince us he's just a sweet little boy. A boy who wants a girl. A girl who won't say yes. A girl who doesn't understand the meaning of a megalodon necklace. Gorgeous.

[Ronnie Karam]

I have to say this, I think was One of the funniest Southern charm episodes that I can remember. Like, just in terms of the sheer amount of. Number of times I laughed and cringed. I was covering my face. It was just like the whole episode just had me cracking up. I'll always remember it. It was. It was. It was. It was an ordeal. It was so cringy.

[Ben Mandelker]

There's a lot you had. The hypocrisy of chap. The hypocrisy of Craig bringing in an alcoholism storyline while he's fucking fall down drunk.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yes.

[Ben Mandelker]

Like, you're doing great over there, Craig. He's like, I'm just trying not to be an alcoholic. I'm like, you're drunk. Can we have this conversation when you're not drunk?

[Ronnie Karam]

Seriously. So let's. Let's dive right into it. So they are coming back from boat. They just got on this yacht, etc. And so now they're gonna get ready for din. Yeah. I feel like. I feel like this whole vacation is always starts off with them just getting back off of a boat and going to dinner. So we're in the guy's suite and Shep is laying on the bed. And Shep is like, gosh, Craig, are you out of the shower yet? Yeah, what's up? It's like, well, you're gonna think I'm an idiot, but can I ask you a question? And his leg is shake. Like, you think. You would think that there is a live wire that has been attached to his calf because that leg is like.

[Ben Mandelker]

That leg is shaking so much, you'd think it had nostril. So Steph's like, oh, my gosh, this is crazy, Craig.

[Ronnie Karam]

It's crazy.

[Ben Mandelker]

I got this necklace for a girl. Will I look like a fool? Will I look like a tool? Will I look like Jeru if I give it to her? And then Craig's just like, why? And he's like, I'm gonna see her tonight. She's coming to dinner. And Craig's like, oh, God. The necklace isn't the weird thing. The dinner is. So she's coming to dinner. Give her the necklace. I mean, I think the decision's din. That's crazy. That's the crazy part. You don't do. You don't have dinner with somebody that's not in love with you. Those are the rules of love.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, she's coming to dinner. Bravo. Do you have anything to say about that? Gosh, I thought I'd get a love, not a sad. So then pregnant. Why is she. It was like a.

[Ben Mandelker]

Running out of Steam. Like a.

[Ronnie Karam]

Why is she coming to dinner? You slept on the beach last night because of her. I mean, Craig is going to be the one who's going to lecture Shep about doing things for someone who's clearly annoyed by their. Their affections. I mean, come on, Greg. That's your whole relationship with Paige.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, and Chef's over it. And I was like, what? And also, Shep didn't sleep on the beach because of her. He slept on the beach because he's a drunk. Okay, yeah, keep himself in line. That's why he slept on the beach.

[Ronnie Karam]

He slept on the beach not because of love. It's because of demons. So Shep is like, gosh, I. I did sleep on that beach. And Craig's like, but you don't have to be a rocket scientist to see that she doesn't like him. I mean, Shep's gonna continue to get led on. So what's the point of having her at dinner? Because also, like, she's allowed to come to dinner. She's like, shep invited her. He likes her. It's not going anywhere. But like, let her come to dinner. You know, it wouldn't be her. Coming to dinner is not a bad thing if you're not a dick to her. Craig, which he winds up being.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, Craig is in full on belligerent, drunk Craig mode this whole episode. But it's funny because he's still got his waving, judgy finger around. So it's like perfect Craig. It's like bloated faced, red faced Craig, you know, judging everybody while he's a walking fucking mess. You know, it's perfect. So. And also, Shep, just to say it again, Shep is not being led on by this girl. How is he being led on? Which he won't even show up anywhere or shoot with. Yeah, he's not being led on. He's being told pretty clearly and he's not listening.

[Ronnie Karam]

She's trying to be polite because he keeps guilting her. And she's like, oh, God, this guy brought all his friends down. Like, it would be so dick if I just ghost him. And it's gonna be documented on tv. So let me, like, say. I'll try to, like, say hi or whatever. I don't know. But Craig is. I think Craig is really demoniz Sienna in a way that I think is actually, like, really obnoxious. So Craig's like, well, I'm not challenging if she's a good person or not. No, no. But we have a connection. This sort of connection that You Honor, by finding a Megalodon tooth and putting it on a chain and wrapping it around her neck. So Craig's like, no, no, you're broken up. Not anymore. Is over.

[Ben Mandelker]

So he's like, so what good is this dinner gonna do? And he's like, it doesn't matter, Craig. It's happening. So, you know, Shup's like, you know, Craig gets it in his mind that someone's not right for one of his friends, and he will not back down. And so he's like, you know, don't be out. Don't ask me to be rational at this moment. That's ridiculous. I'm a boy. A boy with a heart. A heart that's in love.

[Ronnie Karam]

You know, I'll act like it doesn't bother me, but, I mean, it does a little, But I can handle this. Big boys get shark teeth. So Craig is like. He's like, fine. It's like, I'll handle it. Good. Okay. So Shep is like. He's like, shep, does it bother you? And Shep's like, no, I like being around her. I love being around Sienna. Just as she loves me. She really loves me. Craig's like, well, how about this? We don't ignore the end result tonight. So however the you end up tonight, if I'm looking for you again in the hotel at 4 in the morning, can you listen to me and you don't talk to her ever again.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. If this goes all right, then we're done with her. And he goes spell awry. Which is really funny. I can't. I like that he's trying to neg Craig on his way out. I don't think you're allowed to make people when you're carrying around a Megalodon necklace to give to somebody, you jackass.

[Ronnie Karam]

I will say the Megalodon necklace looked better than I thought it would, but it's still a Megalodon necklace.

[Ben Mandelker]

It's a shark tooth necklace.

[Ronnie Karam]

It's still like. Like a beach comber. Like, tchotchke.

[Ben Mandelker]

So I got you a license plate that says your name to hang in your bedroom. Get the fuck out of here.

[Ronnie Karam]

So she's. He's like, okay, gosh, I'm gonna go walk with Sienna down to where we're eating, and then we're gonna hang out and we're gonna have fun. We're going to have fun. She will see that we are a fun, fun group. And then she'll love me again. It'll happen, guys. It was like, yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

So the guys are like, Ah, he doesn't listen to us. He doesn't listen to us because Craig's like, when are you going to have an opinion on something, Austin? Like, oh, she's not going to listen to us anyway. Come on. Come on. And then Rodrigo, just one of the guys, he's like, jesus Christ.

[Ronnie Karam]

I forgot he was even there. It's like a jump. It's like a jump cut to him. A jump scare. I was like, oh, Rodrigo is just sitting on the sofa right below this entire conversation. Like, guys. So Austin's like, is. Is what Craig's saying? Is Shep true? I think yes. Is the. Is the way he's deliver it wrong? I think yes as well. I mean, Craig is just being a dick insane right now. So now we go over to the girl sweet, and Whitney does something radical, which is that he shows up wearing all white, Which I was like, I don't understand this. Like, is he. Yeah. Is he going to a hospital? Like, why is he wearing black? Is he.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, have we seen Whitney and linen before? It's weird. It's just so wrinkly for. For Whitney. But I like it. I mean, Whitney's a fun person to watch sink into alcoholism, I have to say, because he's always kind of kept it together, but he is no longer keeping it together.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yes.

[Ben Mandelker]

He just kind of just wanders around the beach trolling for, you know, young people, and then just joins in the slut shame girls every once in a while. Wasted, you know?

[Ronnie Karam]

So you know when you see, like, when you see an old wasp with, like, a bow tie on sort of slouched over and slurring and murmuring, and you think to yourself, like, how do they get like that? It's happened. Whitney did it. Congratulations.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. You're like, oh, my God, they're gonna sting me. Why is that wasp in a bow tie? What is. Evolution's happening too quickly. So he goes to Madison's room, and she's getting ready. He's like, you have never both got her.

[Ronnie Karam]

So tell me about this book cruise this morning. What did I miss? And that's like. It was a message. Yeah, it was great. And Sally's like, yeah, it was a good day. I mean, Shep was just being sad over Sienna.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

Like a simp. Like a beta simp. When he's like, oh, I don't know what that means, but, like, what the is wrong with him? Well, he can't wrap his head around the fact that she's just not into him, that she. He doesn't, you know, she just. You can't understand that. She's just not born for corn, okay? And, like, could you imagine bringing all your friends and coming here and then not getting laid? See him.

[Ben Mandelker]

He's like, hey, I want you to do the. Do the smokey eyes. Do the smoky eyes medicine. She's like, with these tits, I look like a. And he's like, it's not you. Like, you don't look like one anyway. Wow. Whitney. Every episode in Whitney's in this season. He's disgusting. It's usually a couple, but it's. It's pretty. He's batting pretty high this time.

[Ronnie Karam]

Can you just put all your black back on? I'll see you soon, devil. Just. I don't like. I don't like it. This white cloth clothing wearing. Whitney, go back to the black stuff.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

So then we go to the boys suite, and Craig's like, hey, Austin, do me a favor. If things get intense, just grab my arm.

[Ben Mandelker]

He's like, why are you so worked up about this, Craig? Geez. Rodrigo's like, he's an empath.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. Craig goes, because I'm sensitive to justice and, like, the right and the wrong. He just wants justice. Austin's like, yeah, well, that sounds like JT Dude. Which is kind of funny that he just dinged him for that. And Craig. Craig's like, what? But, like, also like, that doesn't mean that no one else in the world wants it. I want justice, too.

[Ben Mandelker]

Saying he wants justice doesn't mean I can't also want justice. I'm a lawyer and a storyteller.

[Ronnie Karam]

Tall justice, as we know, is way more acceptable than short justice.

[Ben Mandelker]

So now the beach dinner table. Shep comes, you know, and he's like, hi, are you D'Amico? Talk to me about dinner. Looks like you've got everything under control.

[Ronnie Karam]

Wow.

[Ben Mandelker]

This dinner was supposed to be a coronation of our relationship. Oh. We're supposed to ride off into the sunset. Oh. But here I am, like, entering enemy territory almost. I mean, where do I even stand? What position am I even in? It's so hard to express. In the words of Macbeth, thou art, thou ist, and sun is like, flowerist. You haven't read Macbeth, have you? Good, good. Roll with it. Keep it in. Keep it in. Guys.

[Ronnie Karam]

I feel like I'm in enemy territory. It's like the Vietcong are all around me, and Ken Burns isn't here with a camera. Also, by the way, just. Just. Just want to say, I don't know if you can ride off into the sunset if you're on a little island, so that may be a problem with the. The plan all along. So now Sienna shows up, and he's like. They hug and everything and sit down.

[Ben Mandelker]

How are you?

[Ronnie Karam]

Oh, how's it going? She's like, good, except for the sandstorm you've just whipped up with your foot right now. Could you just settle that thing down, please? Thank you very much.

[Ben Mandelker]

I just have to say, Shep is this guy who set up everything, this D'Amico guy. Shep's like, wow. So you set up dinner. Great. Wow, that looks great. Oh, you set up a fire pit for my friends. Wow. You know how to light that? Do you have matches? Yeah, he knows how to fucking light it. Shep. He works there. Like, Shep's just like, you're local. Are you sure you understand how fires work? Need help with that? Sit down. So she's still.

[Ronnie Karam]

By the way, I just want to say. Sorry. I just. I thought I was on mute, and I just slurped the bottom of my. My. My smoothie, and it made a disgusting straw slurping sound, and I thought I had muted myself, and I realized I did not hit mute. So sorry. Everyone who just had me slurping in their ears.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, that's good. It probably sounded like a fart, which is what it looks like. Sienna just smelled. So he's like, how are you? And she's like, good. Like, kind of looking at the ground. And, you know, he's like, oh, wow. You know, I told you I got a gift. I'm gonna give it to you. Do you want it? She's like, I mean, I like gifts. Yeah, sure. So he's like, really? Here we go.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, gifts. That's like my love language. Okay, here we go. So Sienna's like, oh, okay. He's like, are you NER weird? Look. So you see? She's like, no, I'm. I'm curious what this is. And she's like, opening up this little romantically wrapped in tissue paper necklace. Like, not even, like, in a nice little box. It's like.

[Ben Mandelker]

It's in a target bag.

[Ronnie Karam]

It's like. And she's like, oh, it's a triangle. It's a megalodon tooth. Oh, it's a shark necklace.

[Ben Mandelker]

Sharks. He's like, yeah, but it's like a prehistoric shark that was a lot bigger than all the other sharks. Oh, God. Imagine this old man trying to hit on a young woman and bragging that he brought a prehistoric tooth to her. It's just so on the nose, you know?

[Ronnie Karam]

This is. This shark tooth is bigger than the other, like a normal shark tooth. So even though I can't afford that 10 million dollar mansion around the bend, I can afford big shark teeth. She's like, oh, well, I'll wear it right now. So she puts it on right now.

[Ben Mandelker]

Because being in the jaws of a prehistoric shark Sound better than being in this situation right now? Just put it on me. You have 50 more.

[Ronnie Karam]

Someone called the Magnum.

[Ben Mandelker]

Jesus. Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

He's like, well, I mean, it really accentuates your wonderful chest. She's like, ah, you're so silly. Do you like. Do you like how it looks? Because this can be the last time you see it on me, by the way.

[Ben Mandelker]

Just what every woman wants to hear when she's already got the exact. But your chance are good.

[Ronnie Karam]

So then he tries to fix her hair, and she's like, no, don't touch the hair. And so he's like, oh, what? She's like, how's my hair blowing in the wind? Oh, gosh. Yeah. God, I've never been more jealous of my hair than I am right now. The ability to just be blown away from this situation.

[Ben Mandelker]

Even my hair is trying to escape. Well, you know, whatever we have, whatever this is, this is a connection, okay? And that's really rare in this world. Been a whirlwind, a passion, a love. And I haven't even given you syphilis yet. I mean, that's why I invited you to Italy to meet my brother, my sister, my nieces, my mom, my dad, that weird cousin who built a crib in her house for an entire season.

[Ronnie Karam]

It's mossy. And I've been standing here the whole time.

[Ben Mandelker]

I got a baby inside of me.

[Ronnie Karam]

Gosh.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

It's a connection. I think someone has to tell Shep that just because you feel love and you feel a connection does not mean it's automatic for the other person. And the more you say it does not mean, the more true it is. So she's like, I just. He's like, well, I. I actually. It doesn't feel like that at all. It feels like a death by a thousand paper cuts, honestly. And he. She's like, yeah, but we weren't in a relationship. Whoa. But so what were those moments that we had? Like, what was that, just an aberration or something? I mean, Megalodon teeth don't grow on trees, so that has to mean something.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. And I have to point out that she keeps trying to talk and he won't let her talk, which is his normal state. Where he just wants to, like, project all this love onto her and just have her keep nodding. And she's not. She keeps trying to say something and he won't let her. So finally she's like, look, you know, we had fun and we were always having a good time. Right? You know, am I right? And he's like, wow, that's really minimizing it in my mind. I mean, to me, spending three vacation weeks with a beauty queen who refuses to call me back is basically marriage. Now you better learn to make some toast and eggs the way that I like them. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin's commercial. Don't miss Good American Family. We have a little girl here for adoption. She has Dwarf, starring Ellen Pompeo and Mark Duplass.

[C]

Something is off.

[Ben Mandelker]

She's just a little girl. You think she's faking?

[Ronnie Karam]

She has adult teeth. There are signs of puberty.

[Ben Mandelker]

Inspired by the shocking stories that tore a family apart. I don't know what's going on.

[Ronnie Karam]

How old are you?

[Ben Mandelker]

You should get a lawyer.

[C]

You have no idea how those people hurt this girl.

[Ronnie Karam]

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[Ben Mandelker]

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[Ronnie Karam]

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[Ben Mandelker]

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[Ronnie Karam]

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[Ronnie Karam]

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[Ben Mandelker]

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[Ronnie Karam]

Give your home the refresh it needs with wayfair. Head to wayfair.com right now. That's W a Y F A I r Wayfair. Every style, every home. Meanwhile, up on the. Up on the balconies of the hotel, Madison and Taylor are talking, and they're just looking at the view. And Taylor. Taylor's news is that she napped, and Madison's news is that she should have napped. And Taylor's like, are you still napping right now?

[Ben Mandelker]

No, I'm awake. I can't tell the difference. Is there somebody you can give me a sign? Can you move your face in some way? You look like you're in a coma. No, it's just how I am. All right, well, let's try and shoot this scene anyway, in case.

[Ronnie Karam]

Okay. Well, I hung out with Whitney for a while. He wore a wad. It was strange. How was Whitney? Well, he's Whitney. He's having a blast. You know him. It's like, oh, I wonder if Sienna's gonna show up or not. But if not, Shep's gonna cry. I mean, have you ever seen him so emotional? And Taylor's like, no, no, I didn't bring out that side of him.

[Ben Mandelker]

The only terrible time I ever saw him this emotional was when I stepped on an egg in that egg game at that Frank Lloyd Wright house. No, not that kind of emotional. Then, no. I think he's getting a taste of his own medicine, you know? Like, it's not a good feeling, is it?

[Ronnie Karam]

Like, it tastes bad. So then Leva FaceTimes in. She goes, hey, I miss you guys. What did I miss? I'm dying to get to know what's going on. What's up?

[Ben Mandelker]

What is she even doing? Why even bother? Hang up. Who even answers Leva's calls at this point? Lover, you don't do anything. You're not even showing up to work yet. Again, just hang up the phone. I don't care what Leva thinks.

[Ronnie Karam]

I have to say, I do not have. Like, it's so amusing to me how much, like, you are so, like, angered by Leva.

[Ben Mandelker]

She does nothing. She does whatever.

[Ronnie Karam]

She's like anyone else.

[Ben Mandelker]

Shows up on phone calls. She does nothing. On this show, she's just, like, checked out and doesn't do anything, and she just keeps getting a check, you know? It's like how you always bring up that person in a group project who you just. Who doesn't do anything and then still wants to get the grade at the end. That's how I feel about. Oh, okay, I have group project anger.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, she's called in today, but we don't. We can skip the scene.

[Ben Mandelker]

We don't have to skip it. It's not real. It's just. I think she's annoying, but. So she's like, yeah, so I met Shep's girlfriend because, remember at the dog party, she, like, winked at me, and she was like, you know, girl, I'm here for a good time and not a long time up.

[Ronnie Karam]

She.

[Ben Mandelker]

They're like, oh, my God.

[Ronnie Karam]

She's like, well, I miss you guys. Yeah. And so Taylor's like, well, Sienna's been. Sienna's here, and that's been, like, a whole debacle. And love is like, what do you mean? She's like, well, they haven't stayed together one. Not. She hasn't stayed with the night with him. He hasn't stayed with her. Like, don't you think that's weird? Yeah, it's very bizarre.

[Ben Mandelker]

And she's like, guys. Guys turn 40, and then one day they meet a girl that's, like, in their 20s, and they're way faster, smarter, and way better at the game. And then that girl just, like, schools them, and then that's when they finally feel 40. She's just not that.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. Which is pretty true. And so then we. Speaking which, we then go back to Sienna and Shep, and Shep is like, we're in love. Will you admit that? And she's like, I don't know if we're in love. I'm not even sure we're in. Like. He's like, no, you felt love you. I know you felt love because I said I loved you, so that meant that you loved me. And that's what we talked about. I mean, give me, like, tell me that. Like, do we. Do we love? Like, is there. Is there an event that occurred that was like, oh, shit. Like, we were taking on top of a roller coaster and on a journey. It's like, yeah, if you were going up on the roller coaster. Roller coasters only go in one direction. After you go up. Up. It's not going farther up.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, it's just down. And then it was derailed. And you were that idiot who wasn't even wearing a seat belt and then wondered why he got flung off the seat. Flung off the. The roll.

[Ronnie Karam]

I know. Enjoy your severed arm.

[Ben Mandelker]

And Sienna's like, but we weren't even in a relationship. And I completely disagree with that assessment. I can't agree to disagree. She's like, but we didn't have a label on it. He's like, I hate labels. They're millennial. Oh, my God.

[Ronnie Karam]

Like, Chef, like, can't take. Get the hint, Chef. Oh, my God. I wanted to shake my laptop.

[Ben Mandelker]

He's like, here's what I tell labels. Get off my lawn.

[Ronnie Karam]

She's like, I feel a little sick. Oh, gosh. Did you eat the megalodon tooth? No, no, I'm. It's still. I'm still wearing it. Well, I had my heart broken about three or four times, but this might be the first time that I've tried to fight for something when it appeared as that they didn't want feel like Ophelia and Hamlet. Unrequited love. Or is that Macbeth? All I know is all the world's a stage and all the men and women merely megalodon teeth.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, you feel like Ophelia. There's the ocean. Take a walk. So he's like, I'm just hurt. I got her a megalodon. She's like, oh, my God. I hate this guy. You got. You're a megalodon. Leave this woman alone. Leave her alone. You're a stalker in a creep. Just go home.

[Ronnie Karam]

So now the entire cast comes down to dinner while Shep and Sienna are sitting there, which is already so awkward. Why would Shep. Why would Shep have this conversation with Sienna right in, like, the public space where the dinner is?

[Ben Mandelker]

Because he's trying to pressure her into acting like his girlfriend. I mean, he thinks, okay, if I do this, and then all my friends come, surely she's gonna fake it being my girlfriend, right? No, she's not. And good for her. So they come and they see him, like, trying to convince her. He's like, but we. A month. Come on, Sienna. I gave you a megalodon. A megalodon necklace. Do you want to watch? Hey, you want to wear my shoes? They were expensive. Come on.

[Ronnie Karam]

And we. And Austin just sees it, and it's like, Jesus Christ. And Matt's like, ow. They're all like, why. Why are you doing this? And why are you doing it right here? You know?

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Sha's like, oh, gosh, my friends are all here. Let's have fun. You'll see. I'm worth dating. Come on. Come on.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. So now everybody comes to the beach, and she sep's trying to hold her hand, and she won't hold his hand. Good for her. And then Austin runs up and is hugging her. And Craig's like, he's such a. That guy.

[Ronnie Karam]

So. So then Austin's like, saying, hi. Well, by the way, not a. Like, not a. To be gracious and kind to a person at Your dinner.

[Ben Mandelker]

Nothing to you, Craig. Jesus Christ. I think Craig might start. I think Craig's projecting a little bit on women who aren't really interested in the men that they're with because, yeah, yikes. He's taking, I think, a little personally for somebody who spent the last season being like, we're not speaking with Shep anymore. He's too much of a mess. And after Bravo Con, he's disgusting. I'm never talking to him again. Well into this season, he's sure switched to where he's like, oh, all I really care about is Shep's well being. Okay.

[Ronnie Karam]

But Craig also, like, he spends a lot of time constructing images of himself, which he talks about later this episode. You know, right now, he is building the image of himself as like, a Martha Stewart of the South. A man Martha Stewart. And previously, he's constructed the image of him being a lawyer, etc, and when. And I think that he is particularly triggered by. I don't know if it's women or just people in general who threaten to pierce a hole into, like, a fragile guise. His careful, careful attempt at. At creating a public image for himself. So he's seeing that for Shep. You know, like, Shep is trying to.

[Ben Mandelker]

Be like, I can go with that. You know, with that. I think he's got this thing this season where he's like, our team versus their team. Meaning, like, old, you know, old stalwarts on the cast versus these newbies who are trying to come in, like, ganging up with Madison and Austin to try and get JT kicked off. And then it's like, if they're not gonna. If they're not going to do what they want, then they're like, they can't be part of this cast. But this lady doesn't want to be part of your weirdo. Yeah, she's trying to get the fuck out of here. Okay, Just let her go.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. You know, for as much as. You know. It's so funny because the trailers for this season showed that scene of Madison and Patricia sitting in the bed being like, gold digger. And the truth is, Sienna has tried desperately to get away from Shep. Like, she is. She is. She's like, what's the opposite of gold digger? Like, gold fill in the hole. Or she's. She's putting dirt on the gold. She's like, I'm not digging for this gold. I am burying it. Cover the cave.

[Ben Mandelker]

Cover the cave.

[Ronnie Karam]

Gold barrier.

[Ben Mandelker]

Reverse explosion. Cover back.

[Ronnie Karam]

Give gold plastic.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. She did a video this week after the last episode. Where Shep didn't get his way with her. So of course, he insinuated that she's just a gold digging because she asked him to buy her a $10 million house. And so now that he can't afford it, that's why she doesn't like him. Right. That's what he insinuated last week.

[Ronnie Karam]

Right.

[Ben Mandelker]

And she went on and she's like, we were on a boat. We saw a $10 million house. And I said, that house is beautiful. I would love to have a house like that one day. She didn't ask him to buy her the house. Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. Stupid, ridiculous.

[Ben Mandelker]

And then I learned how to put on eyebrow makeup, because that's how Sienna does her video. She's like, well, and then we were on a boat and we saw a house. And then, you know, it's really funny thing about houses, if you really think about it, it takes 20 minutes for her to say one thing. But, girl, I can do my eyebr. So thanks.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. Not everyone can be as succinct as.

[Ben Mandelker]

We are, you know, during our 18 of this podcast.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Craig is being a total dick. He's like, I don't want to say hi because I think in his mind, he's thinking, I'm enabling a situation that that's what he's claiming. But I think he's just being a dick. Like, it's someone at your table. Like, you should just be so gracious enough to say hello, especially because you're supposed to have Southern charm and you should be chivalrous to a lady. So Craig's like, my version of friendship is being honest and tough love. And Austin, being an enabler to Sha is like, not being a good friend. Yeah. I don't know if Craig always loves getting that honesty and tough love coming back to him, but that's fine.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. It's just tough love. Okay, Craig, anybody who criticizes you is completely ousted. Not spoken to for years at a time, please, with your tough love. So then they're trying to, you know, have nice talk with some of them, are trying to make nice with Sienna. Right? So Madison's like, so, what'd you do today? And she's like, it was very boring. What did you guys do? Oh, well, you know, we had fun. It was so beautiful. We got to swim. We talked about corn. Sounds good. And Rodrigo's like, wow, I love this time of the night where everyone's acting. Sally's like, normal, and he goes, normal. Honestly, this is where everyone's their fakest.

[Ronnie Karam]

And then a conch salad arrives. So then everyone's eating. God, the last thing I need to see is Austin eating a conch salad. I'm just imagining like conch just like spitting out in all directions.

[Ben Mandelker]

It's like when it gets to Shep, he's got like full on liquid, all white liquid all over his mouth while he talks and spits everywhere.

[Ronnie Karam]

He's like, yeah, it's really nice night without little ass here. He's like, it's a lovely night. And Molly's like, hahaha. I don't know what I'm laughing at. I just feel like I have to laugh. Molly's like, you're talking about jt. Jt? Where is jt? In hell. Seriously.

[Ben Mandelker]

And Vanita's like, the only thing I'm concerned about right now is jt. Like, is he on a plane? Did he make it to the airport? Like, how's his blood sugar? Like, is he eating okay? What's he drinking? How's he feeling? Those are the things I'm concerned about out this dinner.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Ryan's like, sienna, me, Shep, Taylor and Molly. Hey, Sienna. Oh God, let me start over. Hey, Sienna, me, Shep, Taylor and Molly went snorkeling today. So she's like, oh, well, you know there's sharks out there, right? And because like that was his biggest fear. He's like, you're lucky to be alive. And she. He's like, I could have died. So Shep is like, speaking of sharks, Craig, the necklace. Look. Megalodon tooth sighting, 3pm that's her chest.

[Ben Mandelker]

And she's like, yeah, he got me a megalodon tooth, guys. And Craig's like, he was very excited to give you that. Wow, that's really nice. Wow, what a necklace. And Molly's like, yeah, that's. Ollie's been talking about the whole trap. So Madison's like, oh, wait a minute. Taylor, you have that necklace, right? Didn't he give that to you? Yeah, you gave us the same necklace. He's like, no, yours was a shark. Yours was just a regular shark. Hers is a Megalodon.

[Ronnie Karam]

The way they are all so undermining him is hilarious. And Whitney's like, oh, he says he stays original and what he gives out to girls. She's like, okay, it's a Charleston classic. And then Sina's like, I think it's a Shep classic. And then everyone just like laughs. And Shep was like, gosh, I put a lot of thought into that Megalodon necklace.

[Ben Mandelker]

Is he part of like a shark tooth? Of The Month club, where he's just got an excess of shark teeth that he needs to give away to people. I mean, Jesus Christ.

[Ronnie Karam]

He said his friend is a designs shark tooth necklaces. That's why he has them.

[Ben Mandelker]

Wow.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Madison, tell me you're like a rich, rich white guy in Charleston without telling me you're a rich white guy in Charleston. You're just like, oh, my friend, I just hang out with a guy who makes shark tooth necklaces all day.

[Ben Mandelker]

So Madison's still trying to pump Sienna for info. So how's he doing? Because he was very emotional. Are you doing okay? How are you doing? You doing okay? I mean, chef's not used to having emotions, so it probably vomited all over your face. You want me to wipe emotional vomit off of your face? She's like, I'm okay. It's just, you know, I told him that we should like take a step back, you know, because, you know, I think Shep needs someone to be in the passenger seat of his life. And I'm just like, you know, could you hold this mirror? I'm just not really in the passenger seat of someone's like, are you doing your eyebrows right here at the table? Could you speed this up? This is an hour long, so.

[Ronnie Karam]

Oh, I don't even have a car.

[Ben Mandelker]

Car.

[Ronnie Karam]

I'm kidding. Of course I have a car. Let's make a reference to the passenger seat thing.

[Ben Mandelker]

Oh.

[Ronnie Karam]

Oh, gosh. Oh, God. I see. I just feel bad. Could you imagine you. There's someone you're not that even interested in, and then you get sort of like roped into going to this dinner, and then all their friends are telling you how that person has been emotional and thinking about giving you a gift for like a week. And you're just like, you have to just receive all this information, like, I don't like this person. What do you want me to say? What do you people want me to say? I don't even want to be here. I don't know you people. People. I have friends on this island. You are the ones who are the interlopers here.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, see, and notice what he does here too when he says, I don't even have a car. Just kidding. You know, cuz passengers. See, I do have a car, but it's just a Buick. Probably not something exciting for someone like you wants a 10 million dollar house. Which is why you're dumping me in front of all my friends, right?

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. I'm just a humble boy standing in front of a girl asking her to enjoy a megalodon tooth truth. So Whitney's like, so.

[Ben Mandelker]

By the way, Whitney has been told that he got dumped because when he came, he's like, so how'd it go, Shep? And Shep's like, she dumped me. So Whitney already knows this, right? So Whitney goes, I have a question. Do you see yourself in three years being married and settling down, like, you know, like, living jointly between a Charleston Nassau or like, even getting your own place somewhere? And Shep's like, whitney. And she's like, to get. Get to that place, we'd need to a define the relationship, which, you know, we never did, and, you know, kind of go through those steps. So.

[Ronnie Karam]

And Shep is like, that's such a new age thing. And. And when he's like, well, I'm such a busy buddy, but, like, how would you define your relationship right now? Hold on. I got my mother on the phone to listen in. Mother, listen. And so she's like, blow drying her hair.

[Ben Mandelker]

She's like, as it is now, I mean, mean, I would say we're not really in a relationship right now, you know? And everyone gives a look like, oh, geez, and goes, oh, my God, what am I supposed to do, cry? My ceviche?

[Ronnie Karam]

Yes, actually, I would like to see that. So I was like, no, don't cry. Because if you. Because I'll cry if you cry. Damn. Just kidding. I won't cry at all. He's like, oh, God, I'll cry. Shep, you haven't smiled at all in the last two days. Oh, God. God, go 48 hours without smiling. That. What a. What a sin.

[Ben Mandelker]

Show us those woodly woods. And Chef's like, that's not true. And he's like, yeah, you've been so stressed out. I would call it megal Megalancholy.

[Ronnie Karam]

Megalodon collie. Well, sometimes when I get sad, I think, at least you're not extreme things like a Megalodon.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, you stressed him so much that he blacked out and he slept on the beach. And she's like, ew. She just gives us look like crows.

[Ronnie Karam]

That's such a block move also. God.

[Ben Mandelker]

Okay, so he's like, old habits die hard, friend. And Austin's mouthing, what the is wrong with you, Greg? And he's like, a lot, a lot. He's like, well, yeah, you know what? Chef's allowed to get drunk, you know, because he's sad. You know, he's allowed to fall asleep with a beast if he wants to. I mean, he's a grown man, if you ask Craig. He's like a 45 year old drunk. Well, according to you last reunion he was also a 45 year old drunk which is why you didn't talk to him between last season and this season. Am I the only person remembering this show? These people are on this show.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. I mean by the way, all of this is correct. It could be all of the above. He can be a 45 year old drunk and he can't also be an adult who decides like this is what he's going to do. So there's all that commercials.

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[Ronnie Karam]

So Craig's like, you are just. You were the worst version of yourself the last two days. I mean, it's like, show me that smile again. Don't waste another minute on your crying.

[Ben Mandelker]

That's not very nice to say, especially to the tune of family tunes Family Ties. You know, we've had a lot of fun. You know, we've had a lot of nice moments together. You're making it sound like it's all Meredith Baxter, Bernie, and no Alex Keaton.

[Ronnie Karam]

I was singing Growing Pains. And the fact that you didn't know that shows that you're not a true friend.

[Ben Mandelker]

Gosh, I can't keep control if it's passing.

[Ronnie Karam]

I don't know. Was Joanna Crohn's in Macbeth? Because if she wasn't, I don't know.

[Ben Mandelker]

So he's like, well, you want to date? Did you tell her you want to date her and be exclusive? And he's like, yeah, oh, I'm going to Cuba tomorrow. I prefer communism. And he's like, and what did you say? Sienna. And she's like, well, that might have just been a little too late, right? Sienna. Because we were in love until the five minutes right before this dinner when you laid all that stuff on me.

[Ronnie Karam]

And Vanita's like, sienna, you don't want to be with them right now, or you don't want to be with them ever? Or could it be that it's just something that you could be worked on? It's not a bad question. Good question, Vanita.

[Ben Mandelker]

Because, of course, Benita's there for the. For the. So you're saying he still got a chance, right? Yeah. Right. So we still got a chance. Like, no. And there's not a chance for you either. Vanita, calm your desperate ass down, too.

[Ronnie Karam]

But the fact that they're all having this conversation about Sienna right in front of Sienna is so wild, and actually, I kind of feel like insulting. And so Austin's like, well, why did.

[Ben Mandelker]

Why.

[Ronnie Karam]

Why did you tell Chef that you loved him when you just, like. Well, then you, like, backed off twice? It's like, by the way, people are allowed to say Like, I love you. And then, like. Like, then discover, oh, this is not the person that I thought they were. I don't think I love them. People are allowed to change their minds in life. We also Commitments.

[Ben Mandelker]

We also don't know that she said I love you. I have not heard any confirmation that she said that. And I have heard confirmation that Shep is twisting everything that comes out of this girl's mouth, if not outright lying. So I don't know that I even believe that in the first place. So Shep's like, guys, please don't grill her. Too bad. But he's got a big smile on his face, right? Because this is like, her. This is like his revenge. He's like, all right, you don't want me. Then your subject to my friends. Have fun.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. And so s like, well, this is fun. And S's like, hm, nothing. I just said, this is fun. And Whitney's just, like, laughing. And then Rodrigo's like, this is. I mean, he just got played for a fool in front of everyone. I'm like, sienna, it's time to leave. Like, I just think it's so rude that they're like, g. Why is Sienna still here? I mean, it's like she came as a guest, a chef, because he. He basically begged her to. And now you're going to be mad at her. Like, just treat her with some dignity. She's not on your show. Really? They are so mean to her. And Shep finally is like, he rescues your base when she doesn't need rescuing. She could leave herself. But, like, she's being polite. I think she's. She is giving them way more grace than. Than they deserve. So he's. He basically takes her for a walk away from the table, and he's like, sorry, gosh, everyone's been gar. Drinking all day. She's like, yeah, it's okay, as long as you're okay. He's like, no, I'm uncomfortable, but I don't like to be talked about this way. And I don't like what you're going through. And she's like, yeah, I'm gonna go by yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

Because he's basically like, this isn't great. So go. She's like, yeah. She's like, I just wanted, like, to address the problem. You know, I wanted to save it after the trip, but you insisted that we sit down and talk about it, which, you know, again, is Shep just refusing to listen to anything that she has to say and then being shut. Shocked when he doesn't get the answers that he's demanding, you know, so then back at the table, Austin Craig are talking about it and he's like, yeah, Craig is just sitting here being like, you know, like I'm. I'm like, I just don't want to like, down her throat, Craig. And he's like, yeah, but every second she's here, she gives him false hope. Every second. No, she doesn't. She has given him zero hope.

[Ronnie Karam]

He gives himself false hope. Okay, Craig, Mr. Enlightened who's been talking with therapy speech all season long, suddenly has forgotten the thing that we are the one are in control of our own emotions and no one makes us do anything. And this is such a backwards, asinine thing that shows Craig's true colors that it makes me annoyed.

[Ben Mandelker]

So Shep walks off with Sienna and he's like, I just wanted to come here and us be madly in love. Well, you know what? I wanted a 10 inch dick and $5 million. But guess what? The world had other plans.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. And he's like, like, well, I guess we just missed it by a little window.

[Ben Mandelker]

She's.

[Ronnie Karam]

He like puts out like his fingers like there. A little window, like, I just missed my window. It's like, I'm pretty sure it was a. It was a pretty big window that you missed it by. I don't think it was like, I don't. This was not a near miss. This was a. No, that was a fail. It was a big.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, so it's like she's running for cover. That's how I see it. She knows the truth. She loves me. She just doesn't want to say it. And he's like, you know, I just don't want you to be on the firing line for an hour and a half. And she's like, yeah, I guess I should leave then, right? And he's like, yeah, I guess that's best. But it's not an indication of what I want to have happen. Right. You understand that, right? She's like, no, I got it. Are you taking the megalodon necklace with you? Gorgeous.

[Ronnie Karam]

I have to say, Andy Cohen is going to just have a field day with this. I cannot wait for Andy Cohen is. Will not be. He will not be able to control his glee while he grills chef about this whole situation. It's going to be amazing. So Austin's like, Austin goes up the shop and he's like, she's gonna leave. Okay. Yeah, she's gonna go. Well, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. You're dealing with a It's very raw.

[Ben Mandelker]

We are.

[Ronnie Karam]

We're almost in love by a small window.

[Ben Mandelker]

So. Oh, gosh. So now everybody's like, this is the worst dinner ever. And so they move over to the couches in the fire pit thingy, and they. They play fire. Fireworks come up, which I have a feeling Shep paid for it to get his big romantic.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, I think so. There's no reason for fireworks. They're just eating a conch. Conch salad. And now, to celebrate the arrival of bread, fireworks.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, hey, in my life, that works, but not here. So he's like, wow. You know, Sienna, I thought that even though we guess. I guess we didn't define it, but, God, I hate that. It's so millennial having to define things. Things. And then she just kind of looks away like, he farted again. And he's like, wait, are you a millennial? She's probably a Gen Z or you tool. But that doesn't.

[Ronnie Karam]

I know. And she's just like, I. I don't know what I am at this point. She's just like, I want to say as few words as possible so I can get out of this situation. And he's like, at my age, I know you don't find this that often. I'm sorry. You don't. You just have to honor it and give it a chance. Like, please stop. Just let her go. And she's like, so I'm gonna go. Is it rude for me to leave and not say bye to everyone? I'm like, please, Please don't say bye to them. They're monsters. You deserve better.

[Ben Mandelker]

No, I wish that she had, though. I wish she had been able to just go over and say, okay, guys, well, it was really nice to meet you. Have a good night. And then leave. It sucks that he's like, he didn't get his way, so he's just gonna usher her out the back door, you know, like, see? Yeah. Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

So now Austin's giving everyone shots over by the sofas. And Austin's like, well, I feel bad for this thing, and you feel bad for her, but she's a girl. No, no, I just feel bad that the guy's heart is broken. Dude, that's it. And so then Shep and Sienna are still. Are still hugging goodbye. This is a very long goodbye process.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, truly. So they're hugging by, and she's like, don't hate me, Sheb. Okay? And he's like, I love the smell of you. Ew. What part of no don't you understand? Go away. How do you even have smelling senses left?

[Ronnie Karam]

How could I ever hate? How could I ever hate you? Because I love you. Okay, you're sounding like an 80s song. Come on, let her go. Let her go. Oh my God. So then Craig is like, he's. He's not a idiot, okay? He's 44 years old. Okay? We read the text. She could not be more clear that she doesn't like him. Yeah, we know that. Craig. Craig. And then she's got to go away. God.

[Ben Mandelker]

And this, by this time we can see that Greg, Craig is just drunk. He's red faced. And you know what happens when Craig gets that way. I'm surprised he didn't pull out a water cash to just start throwing at everybody going, I'm too rich for this. So Craig. Yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

Seriously?

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, he's in just belligerent drunk mode. So he's just being a dick. Oh, he's. He's over. It's overkill. Like, even for him, it's overkill. So Austin's like, we know that. You know, read the room. So he's like, oh my God. And by the way, this has got to be awful for Taylor. Taylor, is this like a meat grinder for you to watch him fight for a girl when he didn't. He never even fought for you. Like the off. What's wrong with this guy?

[Ronnie Karam]

What a monster. And she's like, honestly, not at all. I mean, this is like the best gift that Taylor could have received, right? Watching the guy who broke her heart just humiliate himself on tv. And so Craig's like, no, I'm just saying it would drive me nuts. You know, Taylor's like, well, last year I was not in a good place. So, like, that's not me. But it's not my circus. Not my clowns, not my peanuts, not my elephants, not my acro. Okay, all right, we got a Taylor. She's like, to be completely honest, I feel bad for him, but I'm sorry, you're doing it to yourself. Oh, well.

[Ben Mandelker]

So she's like, yeah, at this age you should be very confident in who you are and confident in your life. And you're not, and it's pathetic. And I would just like to say, say no, you shouldn't be. As someone who's older than this, be careful what you say until you're that age, because you always think that you're going to be. You're going to have it together and have a certain amount of confidence of a certain age. Don't count on it, sister.

[Ronnie Karam]

But I, I, I'm allowing it from Taylor because I feel like, you know what? Let her take a victory lap. I think she gets so few of them. I'm going to let her do it. I'm going to give her to her. But, yeah, you'll never, yeah, you'll never really be truly confident in who you are. I think that's what life is about. It's just navigating that. So Austin is like, the minute you're.

[Ben Mandelker]

Confident in who you are, trust me, life will come around and it will pull the rug out from under you. You won't be so sure anymore. So watch your overconfidence there, lady. So Austin now sh. Goes back back to the table and he's doing poor me. I guess I'll just eat dinner alone. What is that? Lobster. Lobster shell speaking everywhere while everyone watches him, talks about how pathetic he is.

[Ronnie Karam]

Molly's like, is he eating alone? Is he crying into his peas and rice? Like, well, seeing Ship heartbroken is a little sad. And by sad, I mean hilarious. But, you know, I think he knows what now he knows what it feels like to get his heart broken. And sometimes that's a lesson that we all need to be taught, especially if you're a Beta. So Vanita goes in to console him and everything, and he's like, she's like.

[Ben Mandelker]

She was just in the firing line. I just feel terrible. And she's like, well, we're your friend first and team Shep first before her. And he's like, yeah, you know what this reminds me of? Oh, my gosh. This reminds me of Romeo and Juliet, where Julia was just standing on the balcony and Romeo's started shooting her with the BB gun. And then all of Juliet's friends came out and started throwing glass bottles at his head. God, I love that show.

[Ronnie Karam]

So then Craig, meanwhile, is like, he ruined a dinner by inviting a fake girlfriend, which I told him not to do. He, I don't think he ruined the dinner at all. You guys were the ones being rude. You guys could have acted like normal people and had a fun time and laughed and joked with her, but instead.

[Ben Mandelker]

He was going to say, you ruined the dinner. Are you talking?

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, exactly. So Vanita's like, telling Shep, like, look, he didn't give. She didn't give you what you want. And she was giving you what you're used to doing to other women, by the way. Just kind of like shade you to hear a little bit. And it's like, you know, it's sad because, you know, you're Coming off a night. Long term, you know, she's saying it's sad, cuz he. He just came out of that relationship with Taylor where he knows he messed up. And now he's like, trying to, like, fix like, dude, you know, he finally opened his heart again, and this is what happened. I'm like, did he ever open his heart in the first. First place to either of these women? I'm not sure about that.

[Ben Mandelker]

No, he's faking it. So he's like, I'm just here to be real. I'm here to be raw. I'm here to let people know how I feel. And guess what? You're gonna hear it.

[Ronnie Karam]

By the way, who are you? Bonita? I've been on your show for a few years.

[Ben Mandelker]

This is Craig. Stand in. Thanks so much, Craig, for everything you've done.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, as Bob Marley Shakespeare once said, true friends are like stars. They're only ever evident when it's dark and it's dark and y'all are here. Thank you for being a star, whoever you are. Now, can I get a coffee, please?

[Ben Mandelker]

Then he, like, stumbles over to the bar, and the bartender's like, hey, how's your night? Fucking terrible. Thanks for asking. Yeah. So you know that girl Sienna? She's Miss Bahamas, right? Yeah, a score, right? Am I right? Well, yeah, I've been seeing her for the. A few months. Why wouldn't I be? I'm happy, handsome, I'm young. Well, you know when something's cool and you're like, what happened? Why? Well, that's what kind of happened right now. I mean, I opened the fan, I've grabbed her by the wrist. I had her, and then somehow she got the. The nerve to roll her blade off. Damn it.

[Ronnie Karam]

I mean, you know, all I did is I walked up to her, I said, could you be loved? And I said, we could have one love. Next thing you know, she's making an exodus. And I'm just trying to have my redemption song. It's just really hard. Hard. But I don't want to wait in vain. Oh.

[Ben Mandelker]

So here we are now.

[Ronnie Karam]

Just three little birds having a cocktail. Am I right, guys?

[Ben Mandelker]

The bartender is like, show me that smile again.

[Ronnie Karam]

Bob Marley wrote that song. Pretty sure it was Alan Thick. It's Bob Marley.

[Ben Mandelker]

So back to the cast. On the couch is Craig's, like, I told you guys all of this stuff would happen. I said, if you invite her to dinner, it's gonna the whole dinner up.

[Ronnie Karam]

This is Craig's favorite thing to do. I told you so at some Point. He's got to learn that no one cares. If you said it first, no one cares anymore, okay? You're not seven years old. I said it would happen. Unless you're on a podcast, we're allowed to say this, but you're not allowed to say this to your friends.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, he's just such an. He is so hard to take right now. So he's like, austin, I know you love me. He goes, yeah. And he goes, but do you a hard time not hating me? And Austin just cracks up. And he's like, yeah, sometimes, sure. And he's like, Cuz sometimes when I look at your face, when I do, I was like, he hates me. I was like, wow, you should see mine.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, it was the same, Craig. Like, I. The same thought about you, Craig. I'm like, this hates me. All right, well, you know what? You guys. You guys have a genuine friendship, and I just think that. That they just need to clear the air and really want to, like, I think they just need to man this, okay? They just need to kiss and make up. All right?

[Ben Mandelker]

They're sisters. They're sisters for life. My favorite thing Madison said about them, they're sisters. So Craig's like, hey, what do I do that drives you so mad? And he's like, well, you take one thing and then, like, you know, you just kind of like, you know, you turn it.

[Ronnie Karam]

Exaggerate. Exag.

[Ben Mandelker]

You're an embellisher. And you know this, Craig. You're an embellisher, okay? And you want to put yourself in the best light possible.

[Ronnie Karam]

I'm a lawyer. A lawyer at a storyteller. I died.

[Ben Mandelker]

What an idiot. And they all start cracking up. And he's like, I think that my self improvement, like, you take it personally. What are you talking about? You're still sitting here, the same belligerent drunk you've always been. Nothing has changed about you. You're still the same compulsively lying, belligerent drunk. There is nothing has changed about you, Craig. Sorry. You're trying to sell it, just like Shep is not buying.

[Ronnie Karam]

And I love that Austin was like, oh, my God, Craig. Like, I will gag myself if you go down this road. Like, don't do this. It's not your self improvement.

[Ben Mandelker]

I'm over.

[Ronnie Karam]

It's insane right now. Craig's like, why wait? You're just gonna walk away? I told you all that he would just walk away. I told you all. And he's like, I'm over it, Craig. So Matt's like, what the heck Betas are fucking button. Craig's like, okay, I'm going to follow you now, Austin. Finish the conversation. Cuz I'm a storyteller. I need to tell my stories.

[Ben Mandelker]

So now Vanita has got a text and she kind of shows it to Sally, but then hides it. And she's like, oh my God, like, seriously, are those all from jt? And she's like, yeah. And she's like, yeah, I can't stray away from what I just saw on your phone. I mean, just paragraphs. That means he really likes you. You know, I mean, that goes on and on. That means a gu really likes you. I mean, he has feelings for you more than a friend. No. And Vanita nods. She's like, yes. Yes, he does. Okay, so here we get to the Vanita section. Now we talked about this on Crappy Hour, so anybody who wants to hear this more in length, just go listen to that episode. So Vanita came out with an Instagram after the last episode telling us that the scene of branzino dinner with what's his buns was filmed after this trip. So she's saying the. The editors are trying to make her look like some homewrecking, you know, floozy, and she's not going to stand by that because that scene was shot after. So that left me with some questions like, well, but then you. He just told you on this trip, I have a girlfriend. Get off of me twice. And you still made that branzino dinner for him. So that was one kind of confusing thing for me. So now she says, so after last night, I for sure, sure know that the feelings I have for JT, JT also has for me, like 100%. And there's no question, there's no doubting. So I was like, wow, he likes me. Like, he likes me likes me. So, jt, I'm sorry, but if JT has a girlfriend in this moment, I feel sorry for the girl on the other side because he's spending all this time talking and texting me and he's giving you crumbs. So why are you coming out with story with an Instagram thing saying they're just editing you to make make you look like a home wrecker. You know, he has a girlfriend and you're still going for jt. Now does that let him off the hook for still texting her paragraphs and paragraphs when he knows how she feels? No. JT's a dog and a piece of crap. But I just don't get the whole Vanita thing.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, well, I'm with Sally, who says if I get paragraphs like that from a man, I'm like, immediately. No, I think that sums it all up.

[Ben Mandelker]

You're just like, keep it simple. It's just too many texts. He's ick to begin with. So that's all the thought you need to put into it.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Craig and Austin are now. They moved over to an area to have their bro talk. And Craig's like, hey, don't get fired up. Even though Craig stoked the flames as usual. And I was like, I'm not. Let's just sit down, dude. It's like, all right, you're fired up. You're crazy. So he's like, listen, you're one of my best friends. I was never trying to do stuff to, like, better myself, to get away from other people. I just wanted to get away from other people to make myself better. And I didn't know that it would ever change, like, the level of our friendship, you know, me like, not hanging out when you try to call to hang out, you know, or like me ditching you so I can plant things. I didn't think that would actually affect our friendship. And I want to go back to a place of love, Greg.

[Ben Mandelker]

I mean, we're honest, okay? All you care about is like this, like, little story that you're like, building for yourself and your reputation, this wonderful image. He's like, an image? Yeah, like you're disappointed in disappointing someone and being like, oh, they can't see me with the beer in my hand or something. And he's like, but do you think I project an image that isn't me? Yeah, Craig, yeah.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah, cuz we've seen you. He's like, yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

He's like, yeah, you know, you have an image to protect. And he's like, just loosen up the reins. And he's like, yeah, but I. I do that cuz I don't have any leash on myself that's any addict. And then Craig lays the storyline on him. He's like, I was like, you know, trying not to be an alcoholic is now affecting my friendship with Austin. So they start crying and he's like.

[Ronnie Karam]

That'S where I was coming from. Like, I have tears in my eyes because it's real. I was like, in the trenches by myself. And like, like, you know, you were like. You were like, oh, wow, you're never with me anymore. I'm like, dude, I don't. Like, I can't, I can't. I gotta stay on my couch, you know, I can't I gotta say my couch or I'm gonna pick up a bottle of Jaeger and do dumb. It's like, bro, the word addict. You never used that with me, bro. It's like, yeah, no, I never said. I laugh until. Until Shep. He's the one that we need to be angry at.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. He's like, yeah, looking. Look at Cheb walk. He ends up on the beach, you know, I'm like, I don't want to do that anymore. I'm just lucky, you know? I'm lucky I got out of it. You're drunk.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. You're drunk right now, by the way.

[Ben Mandelker]

You're drunk right now. Oh, my God. Now, that said, I mean, in the beginning of the season when this whole argument with Austin happened, I'm team Craig. Because it is hard when you quit doing stuff and you. You have to, like, try and maintain relationships with your friend group, and they're not supportive, and they're like, why aren't you drinking? Why aren't you doing coke? Why aren't you drinking? Why aren't you doing coke? You want some coke? Are you sure you don't want to drink? You know, I get that. You know, I've lived it. It's hard. So I'm team Craig for that, but Craig still acts, like, a little beyond that. And so the whole, like, addict thing while he's currently drunk is just a little uncomfortable for me, but I think in general, I'm still team Craig as far as that argument, guys.

[Ronnie Karam]

So Austin's like, well, I should know, man. Like, you know, with the Adderall thing, like, that's. That's like, you. I. I knew you were struggling and stuff. And we see Craig's greatest Adderall hits, and then he's like. He's like, I'm sorry for not understanding what you were going through. Like, you and Paige, strong as hell. Strong as hell. And, like, you're fine with a long distance, and that's clearly a forever couple. So, like, you're not, like, sitting your house just being, like, you know, like, alone battling or. No, Right. Like, yeah, she was right with me this entire time. There's a reason that me and Paige are so close. I just can't imagine being closer to someone. Like, I'm so lucky that she chose to be. Like, I see someone there, and she helped me beat this demon. Demon, Demon. And then we see evidence of that, which is basically her trying to maintain her sanity in Winterhouse while Craig is spiraling out of control. She's like, maybe Stop talking. Talking. Thanks.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. And so he's like, yeah, you know, maybe that's why the image that you were thinking, I was trying to portray, but that is what I was trying to do. You know, I'm not trying to convince other people. I'm actually trying to like become that. So it was nice. You know, this conversation was actually kind of nice. Even though my cynicism, half of me is still screaming, shut up, Craig. Because he's acted like such a. The past few weeks.

[Ronnie Karam]

But it wasn't. I actually thought it was a nice conversation. Yeah, you're not alone. Alone. I. I actually thought as much as these two guys spew, they did actually have some moments that felt introspective and insightful. And yeah, it wasn't all. It wasn't all. It wasn't all self serving. There was like real in there. So they basically are like, they're like connecting now. And so Austin's saying that Craig's addiction doesn't. I like this. We said Craig's addiction doesn't excuse him from being an. It doesn't excuse him from being an angry person. It doesn't excuse a lot of things, but it is a starting point. You know, it's sort of like, yeah, I think that's a good thing. Which it's like, yeah, it doesn't excuse all this stuff that happened, but it does mean that I can be a bit more compassionate to him.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. So they hug and they say they love each other and all of that good stuff. And he's like, wow, it's just so freeing to be transparent, you know, like, if we could have had this conversation sooner, it would have saved us heartache. So they agree to find new quality time together. And doesn't this feel like the end episode of the season? There was a part where I was like, wait a minute. We just announced we're doing Southern charm in Minneapolis and I think it's over. We should find something else.

[Ronnie Karam]

They'll pro. Because now they've got to make a Shep and Molly storyline go, you know?

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. Oh, God. God help.

[Ronnie Karam]

You just wait. You just wait. I think they'll probably have two more episodes. They'll have two more episodes left. I think so. And then the reunion for five weeks. So now everyone sees the guys hugging and they're like, oh, biters. And now is the next morning they have.

[Ben Mandelker]

They're leaving. And so Craig has paid for, which he's sure to let everybody know. I paid for flamingos because I was like, yeah, they offer that. So I paid for it, because I'm not.

[Ronnie Karam]

Or to be fair, I thought it was Spanish dancing lessons, but I guess flamingos and flamos are two different things.

[Ben Mandelker]

He just goes down there and starts stomping in rhythm around the room. So they. Basically, they're down there playing with flamingos at breakfast. And Madison's like, those things are scary. I mean, those things are like Austin without Dockers.

[Ronnie Karam]

I love the flamingos. They're just like little supermodels walking through breakfast, being snooty and being like, what are you guys doing here in my suite?

[Ben Mandelker]

And they're so trained, too, because, you know, they have the people that are bringing them or whatever. They're. They're tamed, I guess I should say. So. They're just. They're working the room, you know, they're like, okay, here we are just walking up to people like shrimp, just staring at them like, yep. All right.

[Ronnie Karam]

Well, you have.

[Ben Mandelker]

Don't say I didn't do my job.

[Ronnie Karam]

You have shrimp. No shrimp. You have shrimp. They're kind of like bird escorts, you know, they're like, hey, looking for a good time. It's like. It's basically flamingo annoying Nora. You know, it's like the anora version of flamingo or the flamingo version of Norris goes either way. So I was more amused by those flamingos than I thought I would be. And I was like, if I ever go there, I'm gonna pay for the flamingos at breakfast.

[Ben Mandelker]

They might as well just be new cast members for the amount we get from some of the new cast members. They're working it harder, you know? So then Shep has food all over his face, of course, at breakfast. And he's like, I'm going to Cuba. This place, they don't require napk of breakfast. Stop trying to wipe my face.

[Ronnie Karam]

Yeah. And then Shep is like, yeah, I'm ready to get the hell out of this country. And Ryan's like, shep, how are you feeling after last night? Man, can you believe we almost got eaten by a shark? Well, I feel free. You know what I mean? Feel very free. He's like, that's good. I'm glad you feel free. I'm going to have nightmares for three years. Yeah, there are more cons looking back than I remembered in the moment. Now that I think about it, she never really did say, I love you. We only did go on one date. I only learned what her name was two weeks ago. Huh. Funny what. What hindsight can give you.

[Ben Mandelker]

What an insane circumstance that I went through. But it's sure good to have my good old friends. I had a lot of laughter, a lot of emotions, but laughter and laughter, cheers and cheers. Shakespeare reference after Shakespeare reference, which I totally get because I've read emotions all.

[Ronnie Karam]

Wait, I'm Rodrigo. I'm going to close out the episode. I wouldn't travel internationally to watch anyone else get broken up with. Now we have the circle that comes in on his face and then closes up.

[Ben Mandelker]

And that brings us to the end of Southern Char, everybody. Next recap will be live next week in Minneapolis, so come see us over there. Also, Cincinnati and Toronto, get your tickets at watch what crappens.com or also also about to go record the Traders season finale for Patreon. So if you want to hear that stuff, go over to Patreon. And remember, if you're a new sign up. Sign up online, not through the Apple app. You can still use the Apple app after you've signed up, but sign up not through that greedy little app. We sure love you guys. We'll talk to you next time.

[Ronnie Karam]

Bye. Watch what crap INS would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King our ways the Amberway it's the Foster and the Furious it's Amanda Foster it's always automatic with Ashley Auto.

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She ain't no shrinking violet Coutar we love you guys. If you like, watch what crappens you can listen ad free right now by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short [e-mail] survey.

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Imagine this. You help your little brother land a great job abroad. But when he arrives, the job doesn't exist. Instead, he's trapped in a heavily guarded compound, forced to sit at a computer and scam innocent victims. All while armed guards stand by with shoot to kill orders. Scam Factory, the explosive new true crime podcast from Wondery exposes a multi billion dollar criminal empire all operating in plain sight. Told through one family's harrowing account of sleepless nights, desperate phone calls and dangerous rescue attempts, Scam Factory reveals a brutal truth. The only way out is to scam their way out. Follow Scam Factory on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of Scam Factory early and ad free right now by Joining Wondery at 24, I lost my narrative, or rather it was stolen from me, and the Monica Lewinsky that my friends and family knew was usurped by false narratives, callous jokes, and politics. I would define Reclaiming as to take back what was yours. Something you possess is lost or stolen, and ultimately you triumph in finding it again. So I think listeners can expect me to be chatting with folks both recognizable and unrecognizable names about the way that people have navigated roads to triumph. My hope is that people will finish an episode of Reclaiming and feel like they filled their tank up, they connected with the people that I'm talking to, and leave with maybe some nuggets that help them feel a little more hopeful. Follow Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to Reclaiming early and ad free right now by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts.