#2879 Next Gen NYC S1Ep1 Part 1: I Believe The Children Are The Future

Summary

Watch What Crappens Podcast Summary

Podcast Information:

• Title: Watch What Crappens
• Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam
• Platform: Wondery
• Episode: #2879 Next Gen NYC S1Ep1 Part 1: I Believe The Children Are The Future
• Release Date: June 5, 2025

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Introduction to "Next Gen NYC" Premiere

In episode #2879 of Watch What Crappens, hosts Ben Mandelker and Ronnie Karam dive into the series premiere of Bravo's Next Gen New York City. The episode serves as a two-part recap, with Part 1 focusing on the initial introduction of the show's cast and the dynamics that unfold in the bustling backdrop of NYC.

Hosts' Initial Reactions

Ben kicks off the discussion by expressing his surprise and enthusiasm:

“And I have to say, I loved this premiere.” (03:59)

Ronnie adds a humorous disclaimer before sharing his thoughts:

“I understand I'm about to make fun of children. Some of you may not be fine with it, but I am.” (03:59)

Both hosts agree that the diverse personalities introduced in the show set the stage for an engaging season, with Ben highlighting the blend of Bravo kids and non-Bravo kids:

“I actually love that it's a blend of Bravo kids, but also non Bravo kids. I think that's exactly how they should have done it.” (05:23)

Character Introductions and Dynamics

Ariana Zolciak Biermann

Ariana, portrayed as a former reality TV star adjusting to life in New York City, grapples with her relationships and personal growth. Ben points out her struggle with her identity amidst her family's fame:

“My mom did Real Housewives of Atlanta, and my dad played football for a while, and now they're gonna divorce, and it's been very messy.” (08:32)

Ronnie humorously criticizes Ariana's mother, Kim Zolciak, for her financial irresponsibility:

“Kim Zolciak should be ashamed of herself.” (31:39)

Brooks Marx

Brooks is depicted as a stoic model dealing with familial pressures and personal ambitions. His interactions often showcase his dry humor and the challenges of living in his mother's shadow:

“He's doing these photos and he's like, I'm feeling, like, so stressed. Can't you see it all over my... Look at me. I'm shaking like a leaf.” (10:25)

Charlie (Last Name Unclear)

Charlie is introduced as a crypto trader with questionable ethics and a penchant for drama. The hosts dissect his controversial involvement in a real-life crypto hostage situation:

“He swims in circles with those people, which I think is pretty not good, I would say.” (15:33)

Georgia

Georgia stands out as the breakout star, a creative strategist whose over-the-top personality brings both humor and chaos to the narrative:

“Georgia's like, literally, I'm the most cut out to live in New York because I literally brush my hair with a fork.” (48:25)

Ava Dash

Ava, the daughter of music mogul Damon Dash and fashion designer Rachel Roy, navigates her modeling career while balancing her high-profile family life:

“I've been modeling my whole life, and I'm at that point where I'm just like. Like, kind of a real adult and just kind of, like, figuring out what the... Does that even mean?” (45:37)

Amira

Amira is portrayed as a content creator and model striving for confidence amidst the pressures of social media and personal image:

“I want to be confident, which is that you have to have a glow up and then, you know, you're complete.” (52:13)

Family Dynamics and Financial Struggles

A significant portion of the episode centers around Ariana's strained relationship with her mother, Kim Zolciak, who continues to request financial support despite Ariana's own challenges:

“Sometimes I don't tell Hudson when she's asking me to send her. Because, like, she's going through this crazy divorce and... I was grown enough to know the truth.” (34:07)

Ronnie underscores the frustration of financial dependency on a parent:

“She did, like, nothing good... lightning off.” (32:23)

Social Interactions and Conflicts

The episode delves into the interactions between characters, highlighting alliances and tensions:

• Brooks and Charlie's Friendship: Their camaraderie is tested as Charlie's flirtatious behavior towards Chloe causes rifts.
• Georgia's Partying Lifestyle: Her extravagant parties and relentless energy clash with the more subdued members of the cast.
• Ava's Modeling Challenges: Balancing a demanding career with personal identity issues creates friction within her family.

Notable Quotes

• Ben Mandelker:

  “You have to have a dream first, but, like, that'll come, I'm sure.” (06:16)

• Ronnie Caram:

  “If you don't like it, you can fuck off.” (03:59)

• Ariana Zolciak Biermann (from the show):

  “I want everyone to feel confident... you have to have a glow up and then... you're complete.” (52:13)

Humorous Observations

Throughout the episode, Ben and Ronnie infuse their commentary with humor, poking fun at character quirks and plot developments:

• On Charlie's Personality:

  “This guy's insufferable.” (46:33)

• On Brooks' Photo Shoots:

  “It's like a walking still picture.” (10:32)

Conclusion and Tease for Part 2

As Part 1 wraps up, the hosts hint at deeper explorations of character arcs and upcoming conflicts in the next episode:

“Congratulations. You've reached the end of part one. Of a two part recap for part two.” (59:32)

They encourage listeners to tune in for the continuation, promising more insights and humorous takes on the unfolding drama of Next Gen NYC.

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Final Thoughts: Episode #2879 of Watch What Crappens offers a thorough and entertaining recap of Next Gen NYC's premiere, blending character analysis with the hosts' signature humor. By highlighting key interactions and underlying tensions, Ben and Ronnie provide listeners with a comprehensive understanding of the show's dynamics, setting the stage for further discussions in the upcoming parts.

Transcript

[Ben Mandelker]

Wondry subscribers can listen to Watch what Crappens ad free right now. Join Wondri in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts.

[Misha Brown]

Every big moment starts with a big dream. But what happens when that big dream turns out to be a big flop? From Wondery and Ill Media, I'm Misha Brown and this is the Big Flop. Every week, comedians join me to chronicle the biggest flubs, fails and blunders of all time. Like Quib.

[Ronnie Caram]

It's kind of like when you give yourself your own nickname and you try to like get other people to do it.

[Misha Brown]

And the 2019 movie adaptation of Cats.

[Ben Mandelker]

Like if I'm watching the dancing and I'm noticing the feet aren't touching the ground, there's something wrong with the movie.

[Misha Brown]

Find out what happens when massive hype turns into major fiasco. Enjoy the Big Flop on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to the Big Flop early and ad free on Wondery. Plus get started with your free trial at wondery.com plus.

[Ben Mandelker]

When there's so much that's a what crap? Who cares what happens when there's so much that crappens? Hello and welcome to Watch what Crappens, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo. To talk about, I'm Ben Mandelker. Joining me today, a representative of Gen Z, Mr. Ronnie Caram. Hi Ronnie, how's it going?

[Ronnie Caram]

I'm not a Z here, that's for sure, but I'm doing good. Generation X Old Old Gen X over here.

[Ben Mandelker]

Reporting for duty, Old Gen nyc. We are here today to talk about the series premiere of Next Gen New York City. Before we get into that, a few things Love island cover. It's exclusively on patreon. Go to patreon.com watch what crappens the first episode, we recapped and made that available for everyone to listen to. It should be on our podcast feed, but everything going forward is going to be on Patreon. So go check that out. We're going to be doing daily drops of recaps. Not really recaps, just like chatting about the last night's episode. So we had a lot of fun already with it. This is gonna be a great season. Can't wait for it to see how it all shakes out. So that's a Patreon. You can also watch us with Patreon with Crappin on Demand. Get the full Crabin experience by going over there. Also, in a week we are going to Seattle and we're going to recap the season premiere of Real Housewives of Miami at the Neptune. Seattle is one of our rowdiest, most devoted audiences and we always have a fabulous time there. We added it on because we just couldn't not go to Seattle on our tour. So please come join us. Come with a group, come with a friends, come with no one. Just come with yourself. We'll take you in any form and we guarantee you'll have a great time. So go to watchfulcraft.com that's where you'll find all your ticketing links for not just the Seattle show, but the week later. We are wrapping everything up here in Los Angeles in the heart of Hollywood at the Fonda Theater. We're going to have a great time there to celebrate the end of a magnificent tour. I would say probably our best tour that we've ever had, the Mounting Hysteria tour. Everyone who's come out so far to our shows all this year, it's been wonderful. The, the audiences have been great and so we're going to send it off with a bang. Come join us again. Ticket links are [e-mail] so with all that out of the way, it is time for us to turn our attention to a brand new show on Bravo, Next gen New York City. This was the show that we'd heard about that there was going to be a show on Bravo about all the kids from Bravo. But I never thought it was going to sort of come out like this. And I have to say, I loved this premiere. Ronnie, what did you think about it?

[Ronnie Caram]

I loved it. And, you know, I have to start with the disclaimer just like I did on Love Island. I understand I'm about to make fun of children. Some of you may not be fine with it, but I am. So go away. I pay taxes, I've aged, and I reserve my right to make fun of younger people. Okay. And if you don't like it, you can fuck off. Okay. And also, I will also make fun of your children at some point. So if you don't want them made fun of, don't bring them around me. And also make fun of your mom, because that's what we do. So I really enjoyed it. I thought it was really fun. I loved all the personalities on it. I think they did a really good job of finding so many personalities to do it. There's a lot of different kinds of personalities on here, which I enjoy.

[Ben Mandelker]

And did you think yes? Yeah, I loved it. And they even gave Riley a personality which was, I think, one of the hardest feats to do. I am I think it's great. I actually love that it's a blend of Bravo kids, but also non Bravo kids. I think that's exactly how they should have done it. Bravo tries its hand at a youth casting, children in the city kind of vibe every few years. Gallery girls, real girlfriends of Paris. And they've done it again here. And I've loved it every time Bravo's done it. But for some reason, it has never quite connected. I really hope that this one connects. I think it will. They've put a huge amount of publicity into this premiere, so I think this will. I think this will do well. It has to. And I'm going to will it to do well.

[Ronnie Caram]

The time will tell, I suppose, but here we are. Next Gen NYC Season 1 Episode 1 welcome to New York. Shots of cities, clips, clips, clips. And then we hear a voice as we see the city, and it says, I don't think that I could have a negative about New York if I wanted to live there longer. You know what I mean to everybody who's 20? Like, if you can't find a negative thing about anywhere you live, you're not looking hard enough.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, this is. I think it's Ariana's voice. Ariana. Ariana Zolciak Biermann. I don't know what her last name is. I don't think she knows what her last name is these days. And she's on a subway looking terrified, and she actually says, I'm actually absolutely petrified right now. And she says, come to New York to make your dreams come true. Of course you have to have a dream first, but, like, that'll come, I'm sure.

[Ronnie Caram]

And then we see Brooks in the confessional. We see a lot of clips of the upcoming season. Right. Should we go over them all or how do you feel?

[Ben Mandelker]

We can just sort of. I think we can sort of get right into the meat of it. We don't have to go through all this. This is like the beginning of a Blow Deck episode. Because it's kind of like. It's kind of like sizzle, really here in the beginning. So it's basically. They're all talking about New York, and it's just great. And meeting all these people really, really quickly. And they're all like, we love New York. People just say what they think.

[Ronnie Caram]

So ariana is. She's 22, which is crazy. She looks totally different than she ever did on Real Housewives of Atlanta. And she's walking two humongous dogs, which, listen, New York City is a great city. For tiny dogs, two big ones are going to be rough. Not that I don't like big dogs. It's going to be rough in a tiny apartment and having to walk those dogs two or three times a day. Good luck. But it's either that or leave them at Kim's Olciax house. And, you know, Kim would eventually turn them into sandwiches for the children. Because Kim is. Kim is desperate.

[Ben Mandelker]

Kim is. Kim is. Yes. So she's walking her dogs and she's encountering things like gaping holes in the sidewalk and then people on the street. And she's like, I love the New York energy. The second I got off my plane and walked out of the airport and smelled the urine and the cigarettes, I was like, this is my place. But to be fair, it also smells like, literally, my place in Georgia. Have you been around Georgia?

[Ronnie Caram]

I'm gonna say it. Cause it's what you grew up in. Your whole house smelled like urine and cigarettes. So then we see Marlene in New York, just some random lady on the street. She's like, hey, you go in there to that butcher, they'll give you a turkey leg. And she's like, oh, my God, thank you so much. What's your name? Like, Marlene. She goes, I'm Ariana. Nice to meet you. She's oh, it's Ariana. Italiana. She's like, are you the one that smells like piss or is it in the city? I can't really tell. Do you smoke?

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, I'm actually still trying to find a place. And she's like, oh, well, there's a place right up here that's maybe for rent. A guy just moved out. Oh, my God, thank you so much. You know, New Yorkers are so friendly. I'm like, please. Marlene's been trying to offload that apartment for six months. I know. It's infested with rats and feces.

[Ronnie Caram]

What Marleene didn't tell you is the guy was murdered and they haven't cleaned it up yet. He's still rotting in that apartment. So please take it over. It's only $10,000 a month and you have to clean it. So.

[Ben Mandelker]

My name, my mom is Kim Zolciak. Do we still say Biermann? I'm not even sure this week. So my mom did Real Housewives of Atlanta, and my dad played football for a while, and now they're gonna divorce, and it's been very messy. So, yeah, I was like, really ready to get out of that urine infested house and get into New York.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. So she's looking for apartments. And she's texting with Brooks and she's like, bleecker Street. Wow, this is amazing. Like, what do you guys street? What do you. What do you guys think? I mean, is there a Zillow for this? Like, no way. 59.95amonth. And it's a two bedroom Italian terrace apartment.

[Ben Mandelker]

So then we have this text conversation and she's like, oh, my God, I just saw an insane apartment, 6K. And Brooks is like, where are you? Little Italy? Don't do it. It's disgusting.

[Ronnie Caram]

Little Italy, big carbs.

[Ben Mandelker]

And then Gia's on the group text and she's like, there's always room for you in New Jersey. And Bruce goes, love you, Gia, but no, you're so lucky you're even allowed on this show with your Jersey hair.

[Ronnie Caram]

And Ariana's like, I'm Kim's daughter and I'm even gonna LOL that one.

[Ben Mandelker]

She's like, we're not gonna bring this show over to Jersey. You're gonna have to cross the George Washington Bridge if you wanna film with us.

[Ronnie Caram]

So she's like, there's not many housewives kids. So I met. I met Gia and I have been friends for years. And then Gia introduced me to Brooks. And so now we see Brooks and he's at a photo shoot, probably with his mom. We see a lot of photo shoots with his mom and he's like in some crazy outfit, disposing, just dead eyed. Which I guess makes sense for Brooks to be a model because Brooks is just so like. And it actually does look so good.

[Ben Mandelker]

And stills, it's perfect for modeling to have no personality and just stare blankly in front of you.

[Ronnie Caram]

I love Brooks. See, I love Brooks in this. I think he's.

[Ben Mandelker]

No, he has tons of personality. I meant more like monotone personality. Sorry, sorry.

[Ronnie Caram]

But it's like a walking still picture because, like, even in scenes where he's upset, he's like, I can't believe he did that to my sister.

[Ben Mandelker]

I hate confrontation. So he's like doing these photos and he's like, I'm feeling, like, so stressed. Can't you see it all over my. Look at me. I'm shaking like a leaf. Can't you tell? Wow. You can read it all over my face. Nothing but stress.

[Ronnie Caram]

Then we find out about Brooks. I'm a model, a clothing designer and entrepreneur, an activist, a twink owner of.

[Ben Mandelker]

A Starbucks rewards card. And on top of that, I'm a member of the Marx family. And then we see. We see clip of Them all together, The Marxes. He's like, it's a full time job. I serve as creative director of my mom's company, which, like, I love my mom. She's, like, amazing. She's literally a mother. But it definitely does feel like you're living in someone's shadow.

[Ronnie Caram]

Mostly because she stands over me and holds a flashlight behind her head. It's hurtful.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, that's what you have to do to make sure your toddler is safe.

[Ronnie Caram]

So he does this photo shoot. Photo shoot. And we see Chloe is there and she's like, taking pictures on her phone. She's like, don't worry if this doesn't work out. I have other copies. Perfect.

[Ben Mandelker]

Perfect.

[Ronnie Caram]

Brooks, you're amazing. Brooks, stop moving. Just kidding. I've never seen you move. Okay, this great. Oh, my God, look. Meredith Marx is also in these pictures.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yes.

[Ronnie Caram]

Give it wind. Give it wind.

[Ben Mandelker]

That's the wind machine.

[Ronnie Caram]

You're stealing my spotlight.

[Ben Mandelker]

I mean, I was told it was a magazine cover without my mom, and then she showed up, and Meredith is, like, wearing a blonde wig.

[Ronnie Caram]

Like, my new wig.

[Ben Mandelker]

Now, for sake.

[Ronnie Caram]

Why would they have a cover shoot with you for Meredith Magazine Monthly? You don't even need to be here. You can leave. I'm gonna call this blonde wig Marlene. Do I look like a Marley? Is that her name? No, that was a lady on the street. What are you guys gonna call me? Marla. Marla. Hey, little girl. They'll give you a turkey leg if you walk into that store. You guys believe it. You fall for it.

[Ben Mandelker]

The best ever. Like, I think you should do that. Like, what is in that tea, girl? And he. Brooks goes, yes, I'll have whatever she's having. Which is the first of many references to When Harry Met Sally in this episode. Which is so funny that it was like this on mainly Georgia. Georgia is really trying to sell a. Like, hey, let's have Gen Z rediscover When Harry Met Sally.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. And everyone's like, what? I don't get it.

[Ben Mandelker]

So Riley, when she goes, I haven't seen that show.

[Ronnie Caram]

So Ava and Charlie, some noobs, arrive at the shoot. And Ava's a model and Charlie's a crypto trader. He's like, kind of the skinny, goofy little guy that gets no respect. So he's like, super. Gives off, like, a super arrogant energy. He's like, yeah, yeah. I'm like, rich and super cool. I'm like, you're also super insecure. And I can't wait to see how this manifests.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. And he also enters the season with a cloud of controversy over his head, which I'm sure you talked about or read about last week.

[Ronnie Caram]

Of course, you know I'm a crypto bro, so I already know about all this. But go ahead, Ben. Inform the people.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, as some people may have read about last week, there. There was this unfolding drama in New York City where there was this guy who was being held hostage in a townhouse in New York City. He was like a crypto guy, but he was being held hostage by two other crypto guys from, like, Kentucky. And they were trying to get his password for his crypto account, and he wouldn't give it to them. So they were torturing him for, like, three weeks. This guy was being tortured, electrocuted, all sorts of crazy ass shit. He finally managed to escape out of this town house of terrors. I mean, it's truly a terrible story. He gets out, he's able to get help. So the cops go back in, or the feds or whoever it was, and they go and they arrest the. The ringleader, the guy. Well, not of the two people. The one who's even worse. Actually, there was a third person who may or may not have been involved. So they arrest this guy in Manhattan, and it's all these pictures of this guy being arrested from this town home. And guess who's standing out there during the arrest on his phone looking confused and like, not just a. Not just a passerby, but someone who was clearly maybe going to visit this town is Charlie himself.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. Yeah. And he's like. It's like a frat house for crypto bros. So, yeah, we'd hang out there. I'll stay there sometimes or whatever. So he didn't do it? I mean, I don't think he did it. Well, we don't think he did it, but he.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, he swims in circles with those people, which I think is pretty not good, I would say.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, crypto is the wild, wild west. Y' all. Get some guy. So my friend the other day was like, I made so much money on fart coin. This isn't even real life. Please, let's talk about something else. So how the top of my mouth hurts? Hold on. My cheekbone hurts. Give it a moment. Give it a moment. You're fine. You're gorgeous.

[Ben Mandelker]

So 2024.

[Ronnie Caram]

That's really weird. That's weird. Why would this part of my cheekbone be hurting?

[Ben Mandelker]

Maybe it's the.

[Ronnie Caram]

It's not a tooth. Okay. Anyway, maybe that's at tmj. Yeah. Maybe. So Charlie comes in to meet. I don't know who he's meeting. Oh, it's Meredith. Because Meredith's like, hi, I'm Marla. I'm Brooks Marx's assistant. You know, the one with a fabulous mother who loves bathtubs and DJing, as you might know from homosexual pride. That just happened all over the country. Are you buying it?

[Ben Mandelker]

So Ava's like, oh, my God, I'm getting scared. Hahaha. But, like, Charlie, I think, actually falls for it. She's like, wow, she completely convinced me. Me. And so then we see Charlie and Charlie and Brooks in the same confessional. There's a lot of. In this show. One thing that they do is they have a lot of, like, different friends sit next to each other during different confessionals. And so Charlie's like, yeah, you know how, like, years ago I would send you, like, screenshots of, like, your hair all fucked up in these Bravo videos? Brooks. Where it's like the best of Brooks Marks. And I'd be like, screenshot you and, like, your lips. And he'd be like, your hair. And I just, like, send it to you, bro. That was awesome, bruh.

[Ronnie Caram]

He's like, remember all the screenshots I sent of you looking like an idiot? He's one of those.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. Thanks for that.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, they made me feel great. So they're all hugging and Charlie and Chloe meet. And then the director's like, oh, my God. Also, I wanted one of you, like, spilling him tea. Like, literally spilling it. Like, we could pour some tea, but then you could be spilling it, saying, I don't know about that. I don't really spell Te drinks tea.

[Ben Mandelker]

Chloe's there and goes, spill the damn tea, Mom.

[Ronnie Caram]

But it's like lemonade, the tea that they get. I didn't really get it because it looked like lemonade spilling. And she. I don't know. It's an endless stream of tea. I don't know how many pictures they went through, but it's just like from the avalanche.

[Ben Mandelker]

This whole scene was so bizarre. And so he's. And then Charlie's like, does anyone want me to blow Brooks? And he has a little wind blower, so he's like, getting the wind on them. And then they're like, wind, wind, wind, more wind on Brooks. Chloe's like, you're doing amazing, sweetie.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yes. And I love the direction she goes, yeah, yeah, more wind. Now laugh at him. Laugh at him. Okay, no, but, like, mean laughing. Laugh at him. Like it's mean.

[Ben Mandelker]

The sort of laughing you would Only laugh in the windstorm. Laugh windstorm. Laughing, laughing mean.

[Ronnie Caram]

Laugh at your child while you're pouring liquid all over them. Like, sounds great. Meredith Monthly's gonna love this.

[Ben Mandelker]

I wonder what these photos are all being used in. Do these photos ever actually get surfaced anywhere? Or are they just.

[Ronnie Caram]

I don't know, but there's like multiple shots. There's multiple scenes of them doing photo shoots together. It's weird and very them. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin's commercial.

[Amira]

Every successful business starts with an idea, and on the Best Idea yet, we're obsessed with those light bulb moments. Like how a bored barista invented the Frappuccino during his downtime and then it got acquired by Starbucks. Or how Patagonia's iconic fleece was inspired by a toilet seat cover. On the Best Idea yet, we dive into the untold origin stories behind the products you're obsessed with, and the bold risk takers made them go viral. These are the wild ideas and insights that made Birkenstock the best selling sandals since Jesus and made Super Mario the most played video game in the history of attention spans. Yeah, Nintendo almost became a ramen company until Super Mario saved it. New episodes drop every Tuesday. Follow the Best Idea yet on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen early and ad free right now by joining Wondery Plus. And if this podcast lasts longer than 45 minutes, click call your doctor.

[Ariana Zolciak Biermann]

At 24, I lost my narrative, or rather it was stolen from me, and the Monica Lewinsky that my friends and family knew was usurped by false narratives, callous jokes, and politics. I would define reclaiming as to take back what was yours. Something you possess is lost or stolen, and ultimately you triumph in finding it again. So I think listeners can expect me to be chatting with folks both recognizable and unrecognizable names about the way that people have navigated roads to triumph. My hope is that people will finish an episode of Reclaiming and feel like they filled their tank up, they connected with the people that I'm talking to, and leave with maybe some nuggets that help them feel a little more hopeful. Follow Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky on the Wondery App or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to Reclaiming early and ad free right now by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts.

[Ben Mandelker]

So then the producer is like, so what do you like most about Charlie? And we see Charlie in the confessional with Ava, but His, like. He has his, like, shirt wide open so he can show off his new, like, little chest tattoos that he has. He's like, yeah, I'm like. I'm like a guy who's. I'm tough. I'm the son of a mutual fund manager because I'm. And I've been born on these streets.

[Ronnie Caram]

Nothing tough. Like a Harry Styles tattoo across your chest.

[Ben Mandelker]

Okay. Those tattoos are the worst.

[Ronnie Caram]

They're the ones. I feel so bad for them because it's just, like, such a trend. And then when that's over, you're just like, the weirdo who has a Harry Styles tattoo.

[Ben Mandelker]

You just have a big butterfly in your chest.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

It's awkward, undermining whatever definition you worked so hard to build.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. Which he does. He does have that as well. So Ava's like, yeah, I'll tell you, Charlie has no filter, and he's very direct. And I'm Ava, I have no batteries. I'm completely devoid of any kind of energy or charisma or personality.

[Ben Mandelker]

It's all been put into my perfect face and everything else. There's nothing left. So Charlie's like, yeah, I definitely get in trouble with my math. So Chloe's like, hey, so what'd you guys do for Memorial Day weekend?

[Ronnie Caram]

Forgot. Get it.

[Ben Mandelker]

I was supposed to go to the Hamptons, but I was shooting a campaign, so I was in the city Saturday and Sunday.

[Ronnie Caram]

Charlie's like, we gotta find a good party to go to. We could do Casa. If not, we can do Zero Bond. And they had to put it in subtitles, but they were like, these are Gen Z subtitles. They're all in different, like, crazy tik Tok fonts. But I like that they had to put them in there because his dictionary is like, castle. Zero Bond. We can go to Castle.

[Ben Mandelker]

Do you want to go to Zero Bond? I'm going to Five Bond. No, Zero Bond. Zero Bonds. What's in right now?

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, let's also go to that place Georgia was talking about. Oh, yeah, Gonzo. I love that. Gonzo has a place now. He deserves it. He's like the most underrated Muppet.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. With that trumpet always exploding in his face. Does it explode in his face? Why do I think his trumpet explodes in his face?

[Ronnie Caram]

No, but he blows it. And then he has, like, the little flying motorcycle thing, like the Muppet Caper. I mean, Gonzo saved a lot of lives.

[Ben Mandelker]

I love his dedication to Priscilla the Chicken. Gonzo has always been probably, like, my favorite Muppet, I think.

[Ronnie Caram]

I think people don't like him, because he's like a chicken. But you know what? I'm from the South.

[Ben Mandelker]

Wonderful. So we're gonna go to Gonzo Zero Bondra Casa tonight, guys. What are we gonna do? So then we see a screen, then we see a text thread, and Charlie says, meet up at Gonzo tonight. And then Georgia says, splendid. And then Charlie's like, chloe, when are you, like, where do you go when you go out? We spoke about this on FaceTime the other day, remember? Do you go to Gonzo or do you go to Zero Bond? Or do you go to Casa? All of the above or none of the above.

[Ronnie Caram]

She's like, chloe just goes, yeah, like Chloe is getting into her mom's stash. I don't. Chloe has never had a lot of energy either, which is so funny. Every time they try to make conversation like, so, Chloe, what did you think about that article in the New York Times? She's like, yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. So Ava's like, you guys FaceTimed? Charlie goes, yeah, Brooks handed her off. Yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

Do you have a boyfriend? She's like, I don't know. Like, I'm like, single, and it's like, the first time. So I'm like, oh, my God. Like, if something with the right person happens, I mean, I guess we'll see a Gonzo.

[Ben Mandelker]

So what do you like, who are you seeing, Chloe?

[Ronnie Caram]

No one. No, no, this is Charlie. Who are you seeing, Charlie? He's like, no one. Is everyone.

[Ben Mandelker]

Oh, then Ava's like a man of the streets. I'm officially seeing nobody officially right now. Oh, my God. Summer, hot boys.

[Ronnie Caram]

Summer.

[Ben Mandelker]

Then Brooks tells us. We have to. We actually have to articulate between Brooks and Chloe because they sound exactly the same.

[Ronnie Caram]

No, I think they can sound. They've always. In my voice. They've always sounded. Because they do sound exactly the same.

[Ben Mandelker]

No, I'm saying. I feel like I always have to say Brooks says, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

Because they're the same.

[Ben Mandelker]

So Brooks is like, when I met Charlie, he was in a relationship, and then Charlie is now single. It's like two different people. It's like going to Gonzo and then finding out you went to Casa instead. It's crazy.

[Ronnie Caram]

So then Charlie's like, so, Chloe, how old are you? She's like, 22, but my birthday is 14 days before Brooks, so almost 23. Wait, how's that possible?

[Ben Mandelker]

Is it. Well, they could.

[Ronnie Caram]

They must have been, like, a year and 14 days, something like that. Sorry, I was like, wow.

[Ben Mandelker]

Something like that.

[Ronnie Caram]

Of only Meredith Marks would be like, well, I'm pregnant again. That's crazy. They're not twins. I got pregnant with one 14 days later than the other one.

[Ben Mandelker]

They are gonna have the same voice and same face and everything the same, but they will be different days born.

[Ronnie Caram]

I'm a double wound woman. Okay. One is Meredith's womb and the others is Marla's womb. Chloe came out blonde.

[Ben Mandelker]

So Brooks has now is witnessing Charlie flirting with Chloe. So he's like, oh my God. I'm like, not okay amongst me. To my. And my Charlie, he is literally. He's like never grown up. He's like such like a baby. And then it cuts to him lying on Meredith's. Meredith's lap, just staring at her like, you're the best mom.

[Ronnie Caram]

Mean laughing, mean laughing.

[Ben Mandelker]

So then talk about the fact that, by the way, we didn't talk about the fact that half the scene Brooks has some weird pink like spaghetti wig on his head.

[Ronnie Caram]

The things they do to Brooks in this show. It's hard to even get them all in because he seems like he doesn't have that much going on. But we've already seen like five different wigs and three photo shoots, so I'm not really sure what's happening.

[Ben Mandelker]

And he's had tea port on his head. So now we have Ariana and Hudson who are walking hand in hand. Hudson is her boyfriend. We, we talked. We did a trailer trash of this show, which you guys should all check on Patreon. But we were wondering who was this sort of adolescent boy with the sideburns and the long hair trying to be tough. And now we meet up him. His. He's Hudson.

[Ronnie Caram]

It's Hudson. He does not belong here. Hudson looks like he is waiting for the doors to open on Black Friday at Walmart and he's going to beat somebody for a TV is what it.

[Ben Mandelker]

Looks like he does. And he sort of has Josh Groban styling, but kind of like, I don't know, like kind of Josh Groban meets like kid from an 80s movie kind of.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yes, he does have like a very like, we're going to find. We're gonna find the treasure map. It's like the Goonies. He's kind of got a Goonies thing going on.

[Ben Mandelker]

He's like, if Josh Groban were in the Goonies, this is Hudson.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, he does have that. And look, we don't know anything about Hudson yet. All I do know is that he's not addicted to conditioner. So they're walking and Ariana's like, oh my God, New York in The wind is amazing. Like, every time I'm going somewhere, my hair is slicked back. It's, like, ruined. And like. Like three seconds. I love this city. Someone pissed on my face today. It was great.

[Ben Mandelker]

So they sit down at this restaurant, and the. Their server is like, good to see you again. Who knew it would lead to this? And I thought it was be like, G. These Gen Z servers. And it's like a guy who's like, 65. I was like.

[Ronnie Caram]

He's like, oh, the fried chicken air. Welcome home, honey. All right, where can I get you? So she's like, I brought my boyfriend Hudson to New York. We've been together for two years, on and off for nine. He's my favorite, like, literal favorite person in the world. Literally my favorite person. Like, who's Mickey Mouse? Fuck that guy. Cut his fucking head off and shove it up his asshole. Hudson's the way to go now.

[Ben Mandelker]

How old is Ariana now? Is she 22?

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, she's a little bit. No, she's. Yeah, she's 22.

[Ben Mandelker]

She's older. How old is Ariana Zolciak? Because she's 23 years old. If she's been on and off for 20 for nine years.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, it's her high school boyfriend. They were 14.

[Ben Mandelker]

Come on, it's time to. Let's, let's. Let's get a new model here.

[Ronnie Caram]

She's not getting rid of that guy. He's a fried chicken heir. He's like, well, we didn't realize chicken or something.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, that's. That's the thing. We don't find that out till later on.

[Ronnie Caram]

But her mom didn't raise an idiot.

[Ben Mandelker]

Absolutely not. So they. They're trying food, and he's like, you have to swallow first. She's like, oh, my God, look. Look at my $800 Christian Louboutin heels. They're like, are you kidding me? It's like, not even a red bottom. It's like half red bottom. It's, like, destroyed because her shoe is, like, all tatted up.

[Ronnie Caram]

Does that mean you wear your red Louboutin to go apartment hunting and walking all over? What is wrong with you? They probably came like that because, you know, Kim got those out of a trash can somewhere and just handed them off.

[Ben Mandelker]

I was about to say, these are probably not Lubitons in the first place. They're Lubatones.

[Ronnie Caram]

So.

[Ben Mandelker]

Boubatons.

[Ronnie Caram]

Luba tries Craston, Crasston, Lubitans, Luba funds. She's like, I've been on TV since I Was five years old. I did reality television with my family post clips. Okay, they're amazing. And then I started posting on Insta and I got my first brand deal when I was 14. It was for dog food, but still I was doing like 3 posts for Purina a week. And you get paid astronomical to do a story on Instagram. And I made so much money.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yes. But then she says, but unfortunately my parents took my money, which is Chef's Kiss. Ugh. I loved hearing this because it was so, it confirmed so much. I was like, oh, I. I love that she's calling out her mom on her own show. I was like, good for you.

[Ronnie Caram]

Good for you. I was proud of her for this. Kim Zolciak. That is despicable to steal your children's money. And then we find out that Kim is still calling every day for money.

[Ben Mandelker]

It's just like Kim, Kim became that mom that I just thought it would still like for some reason, I don't know why it didn't occur to me that she wouldn't take her kids money. I think it's because I just didn't think her kids had money. But now that we see that her kids do have money, of course Kim stole all them.

[Ronnie Caram]

Of course she did. And it wasn't even for anything good. It was like for scratch offs and nickel machines. Machines, yes.

[Ben Mandelker]

And so Ariana's like, did I see.

[Ronnie Caram]

My mom rough over here? You know, I'll pay you back. I'll pay you back in two seconds. I'll pay you back like any second, man. I'm gonna win one of them scratch offs. Just give it to me, give it to me.

[Ben Mandelker]

And then Ariana is saying that she saw Kim drinking a 200 bottle of wine on her story. And so Hudson is like, this is where I started to like Hudson a little bit because he, he hates this. And he's like, yeah. And she almost brags to us that she's like, oh yeah, I'm drinking the same bottle of wine right now. And we're like, why are you doing that? She's like, yeah, but, but can't say exactly what they used that money for because I just found out that it was gone two years ago. I'm like, well look at the cars in your driveway. And that's where the money is right now.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh my God, she stole all that money. And so she's like, you know, and like, I wish I would have been kept in the light about it cuz like I was grown enough to know the truth. But you know, now our house is about to be gone, and they lie, you know, and the lying is why I moved out.

[Ben Mandelker]

Ariana wanting to be in the light about why her mom was throwing the money. Because then it's not stealing anymore. Yeah, because then you. You. Because she knows that you'll say no. That's why she steals it.

[Ronnie Caram]

That's just disgusting. Kim Zolciak should be ashamed of herself. Although we know that she's not capable of that. But it would be nice to see. So Hudson's over this and he's like, you know, she's saying the thing me and Hudson do struggle with sometimes is that my mom is still asking me for money. And he's like, yeah, I don't like that. And then we see flashback of Kim being like, oh, yes, well, I just sent you something. I just sent you something. It was a Venmo request. Happy Valentine's Day. Happy Valentine's Day, honey.

[Ben Mandelker]

Hudson's like, you have to tell her, no, I can't send you the money this month. Okay? Like, you've already taken everything I have. As we all know, the only people who should be receiving money are the children. He's acting like he has some sort of career. Also, by the way, you know, he's a user too.

[Ronnie Caram]

Well, at least he's using his own parents and not the other way around. It's like he's going back to nature.

[Ben Mandelker]

So Ariana's like, sometimes I don't tell Hudson when she's asking me to send her. Send me something. Because, like, she's going through this crazy divorce and, like, the mother to four kids. And, like, I get it. And I never want money to destroy a relationship with my. My family ever. Well, it hasn't stopped Kim. Yeah, maybe she doesn't Kim's child after all.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, disgusting. And you didn't have them kids. She did. So Hudson's like, yeah, but you're still taking money and giving it to her. And she's like, yeah, but like, at the same time, what. What do you expect me to do? Like, the AC is not working. I pay the AC bill. Like, what supposed to do? Get those kids a damn job. I've seen them online. They're old enough to work at a bowling alley. Get them. Get them to work. Why should you have to do it?

[Ben Mandelker]

What's Brielle doing these days, by the way?

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, my God. I'm surprised they never mentioned Brielle. Do you think Brielle's, like, holding out and waiting for her own moment?

[Ben Mandelker]

I feel like Brielle's falling into. I don't know, like, it's. I think it's weird that Brielle is. Is not really the focus here. It's. It's weird that.

[Ronnie Caram]

That.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. I want to know what's going on with Brielle.

[Ronnie Caram]

Well, I looked. She's got 1.3 million followers. That's cray cray. And she. She looks less crazy. I will say. She's got black hair now, I think. And it says Brielle Beerman, American socialite. Lol. Okay. She just got engaged too, so maybe that's. She maybe found a rich dude and that's why she's a socialite now. But she's, I think, a brunette. Some guy's proposing in Scottsdale. So.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, that's. That makes sense. That's a trajectory. Scottsdale is a trajectory for her for sure.

[Ronnie Caram]

That's a good one, though. That's a nice ending, right? Well, not ending.

[Ben Mandelker]

She looks a lot like him.

[Ronnie Caram]

She does. And she looks a lot less crazy, I think, than she's looked in the recent past. Very, very beautiful. It's crazy that she got Kim's face.

[Ben Mandelker]

Isn't it crazy?

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. I'm looking at a video of her right now. Beautiful girl.

[Ben Mandelker]

Kim must be spiraling now that she'd like. Her daughters are moving out. They're doing better than her. They look younger than her. That's a lot.

[Ronnie Caram]

So live off of them, though. If they both got rich guys, she's probably planning on cashing those checks for the rest of her life. Kim. Gross. Kim, have some self respect.

[Ben Mandelker]

So anyway, Hudson is basically like, like, yeah, she's trash. And we have. We can't keep paying, like, for her lifestyle. And he's like, you know, Ariana's like, well, it's just not your business. And he's like, well, it's not my business. It's our business now because the position they put you in, it's our business and you can't even say that it isn't. And she's like, well, what am I supposed to do? Say no? He's like, yeah, I kind of wish you would.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, you say no and let her figure it out.

[Ben Mandelker]

So then friends don't let friends pay for Kim Zolciak.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, exactly. Let them kids. Let them new kids figure out how to get a sponsored Instagram. Why is it all up to you? Yeah, okay. Night. Lifetime. So Georgia, we meet Georgia, and she's being painted, I guess. And she's like, honestly, this is my dream. I'm just sipping Red wine and someone's painting me. Yeah, it's art. Just like, so art. I'm so art.

[Ben Mandelker]

George is the true breakout star of this show. I'm gonna say she is, but she is 100%. We'll never shake her hand, but she is the breakout star. And so this painter is like, yes, fabulous. You have good bone structure. You're like a modern day Meredith Marks. Thank you. But I do, you know, I do look a little, like, I don't know, malnourished for sure. Right, Right. Yeah. Nourish. Germ positive. Nourishment negative.

[Ronnie Caram]

So Brooks is like, where are you? And then we go to Brooks and he's like, should we, like, try to call? So they call Charlie and he's 15 minutes away. And Brooks is like, you're not even in a car. Are you in a car?

[Ben Mandelker]

Because they're all waiting in line outside of this. Like, maybe it's like gonzo. Are they trying to get into gonzo right now?

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, they're in line at gonzo, I'm assuming. And so now Charlie's flirting with Chloe over the phone. He's like, chloe, my love. And Brooks is like, we have to wait for you. Are we on the list? Chloe's like, yeah, are we on the list or do we have to wait for you?

[Ben Mandelker]

Like you're on the list. He's like, wait, we've been on the list the whole time. Oh, my God, we've been on the lists. We should go talk to them because we're on the list.

[Ronnie Caram]

Hey, are you guys on the list? He's like, we should be on the list. And Chloe's like, we're on the list.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, we're on the list. We're on Chloe. Are you on the Brooks and Chloe list? Cuz we're on that list.

[Ronnie Caram]

We're on the list. And they're like, you're on the list. Like, told you, Tati are on the list.

[Ben Mandelker]

Let's go in. I'm sick of looking at the list that we're on.

[Ronnie Caram]

So they finally meet up with Georgia and they're all hugging, and Georgia's like, oh, my God. Oh, my God, no way. I've heard so much about you from Charlie, Chloe. So much.

[Ben Mandelker]

Chloe. Chloe, of course, is very excited to hear this. And she goes, oh, my God. So Brooks is like, yeah, we had.

[Ronnie Caram]

A FaceTime sesh, so.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, yeah, we, like, talked. We talked about going to Gonzo. We're put on the list. Yeah.

[Ronnie Caram]

So Brooks tells us about Georgia, and he's like, georgia, honestly, Gives, like, I literally don't sleep. I go out all the time. I'm constantly working. So she grows.

[Ben Mandelker]

Wait, wait. Can I step into the role of Ronnie Caram?

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah.

[Ben Mandelker]

That means she's on coke, right? Everything I've learned from you for 13 years says, wait. She doesn't go to sleep. She works all the time. She's young, and she's in New York City. Cocaine.

[Ronnie Caram]

No, you can still do it when you're young. It's when you're. It's when you're in your 30s and you're still like, wow, I just got home at 5 in the morning. My eyes are like dimes. I didn't see coke eyes on this girl. On Georgia. No, I too chill. George is like, hey, yeah, I love partying. Like, I threw a party at the top of the McDonald's spaceship in the playground. Literally, everybody came. Pitbull DJed it. Like, it changed the city.

[Ben Mandelker]

When you think of, like, New York, I feel like everyone thinks of Georgia. Ariana's like, thank you. That's what I've been saying all this time. No, not actual Georgia. This Georgia. I guess most people think of Gossip Girl, but then you think about Georgia.

[Ronnie Caram]

So they're like, yeah, Charlie's still 15 minutes away. She's like, oh, my God. God, Charlie's gonna be 15 minutes away for, like, 10 years. That's like Charlie's traject.

[Ben Mandelker]

That was, like, so funny. Chloe, wasn't that, like, so funny.

[Ronnie Caram]

Is When Harry met Sally. Tell me the truth.

[Ben Mandelker]

Listen to Chloe. She literally can't stop laughing. Your joke. Listen to her now. Laughing. Ha ha.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, my God.

[Ben Mandelker]

So funny.

[Ronnie Caram]

So they met each other. Georgia and Brooks met each other through Charlie. And Brook's like, yeah, she. I was invited to an event that Georgia was throwing, and then Charlie was, like, seven hours late.

[Ben Mandelker]

Chloe loves that story.

[Ronnie Caram]

And Charlie's like, oh, wow. Hey, everybody. Like, wow. Let's take a shot. Oh, God. That was the worst shot I've ever taken. Disgusting.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. So then he. Charlie's like, hey, Chloe. Yeah, there's some cool bars near our spa. She's like, near your apartment? Yeah, we should grab a drink there sometime. It's kind of like going to casa, but different. Cool. I could be down.

[Ronnie Caram]

Could I have your seed phrase? He's like, no, God, stop asking. So he's like, yeah, going out with my friend's sister. Great idea. What problem could that. Cause I'm Charlie. I'm a rebel. I'm Rebel Charlie.

[Ben Mandelker]

Commercials.

[Ronnie Caram]

Here comes one right now.

[Misha Brown]

Every big moment starts with a big dream. But what happens when that big dream turns out to be a big flop? From Wondery and ill media, I'm Misha Brown, and this is the big Flop. Every week, comedians join me to chronicle the biggest flubs, fails, and blunders of all time. Like Quibi, it's kind of like, like.

[Ronnie Caram]

When you give yourself your own nickname and you try to, like, get other people to do it.

[Misha Brown]

And the 2019 movie adaptation of Cats.

[Ben Mandelker]

Like, if I'm watching the dancing and I'm noticing the feet aren't touching the ground, there's something wrong with the movie.

[Misha Brown]

Find out what happens when massive hype turns into major fiasco. Enjoy the big Flop on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to the big flop early and ad free on one wondery plus get started with your free [e-mail] plus.

[Ben Mandelker]

So now after this night of mirth and joy, now it's time to see city life. And song starts playing. It's like, I just want to have fun. Clap my hands, turn around now dance, dance, dance. No one on this cast is doing any of those things. I am not seeing Brooks Marks clapping hands, turning around or dance, dance, dancing.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. Meredith is probably somewhere with a bottle raised in the air, alone at home in a bathroom. DJ Meredith Marks playing my new favorite song, I just want to dance and turn around now. So let's go to the most energetic person of this cast, Ava. Ava Dash. How can you have this little energy? And your name is Dash?

[Ben Mandelker]

Yes, it is. Ava. So she's with her dad, Damon Dash, who they call Dame, which is kind of funny. Dame. If he ever were knighted, would he become. Would he be named, known as Sir Dame.

[Ronnie Caram]

Dimash. So they're. They're playing around as a family, and they're playing I Spy. And she, Ava says, okay, I spy with my eye, with my little eye something black. And Dame's like, definitely not one of Ava's boyfriends. And they all crack up.

[Ben Mandelker]

So for those who don't know, Damon Dash co founded Rockefeller Records. She tells us about her parents. So he. He founded Rockefeller Records. Music mogul, Huge. Etc. And then her mom is Rachel Roy. And so I did not know all of this.

[Ronnie Caram]

Becky with the good hair.

[Ben Mandelker]

Becky with the good hair. We didn't realize this. Well, when we saw the preview, when we did the trailer trash, we saw Damon Dash. But Rachael Roy was not in the preview. And we had not fully accessed our full Damon Dash dating or marital history, which is that he was Formerly married to Rachel Roy, which I think we did know at some point, but it's just not one of those things that we committed to our memories. So, yes, this is her full trajectory. And they sired Ava, this gorgeous, gorgeous woman who is a model now.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. So Dame is like, yeah, I grew up with all these guys. You know, we went to high school together. Let me tell you a fun fact. Claude was known for being the fastest dude on Broadway. And then we see his friend Claudia B. And he's like, we used to race right there. And they're like, talking about the old days with the kids. And so Dan's like, yeah, I ain't seen Ava in a long time. She's doing her thing. She's supermodeling, all of that. She just did a campaign for Tommy Hilfinger. Am I supposed to be impressed, or is this, like, a ripoff that actually sells rings?

[Ben Mandelker]

It's. It's one of Kim Zolciak's favorite brand. Tommy Hilfinger. So Ava's like, I've been modeling my whole life, and I'm at that point where I'm just like. Like, kind of a real adult and just kind of, like, figuring out what the. Does that even mean? I'm like, okay, you're not an adult, probably. So.

[Ronnie Caram]

So he goes up to meet with Charlie. She goes up to meet with Charlie, and he's like, I'll be at your In. I'll be at your Runway show. Check. You better be. And so he's like, so then we switch over to Charlie, and Charlie's like, I'm from New York, born and raised, super hungover. That's just how I roll. Here's what I love. Love money, girls, and fun. And crypto, brah. I like crypto.

[Ben Mandelker]

This guy's insufferable. I'm sorry. He's like, my dad is a retired investment banker, and he makes a. She made a ton of money. So I get some money from my dad, and then I use that to invest in cryptocurrencies. I mean, this guy really is out of Gossip Girl. Like, when you see these shows of, like, privileged New Yorkers, you know, who are, like, 17 years old, but they're acting like they're 27. And you're like, this people really exist. This is just in the Gossip Girl universe. But this guy is. He's like a Chuck Bass. He is here. And much less charming when you know they're real people.

[Ronnie Caram]

They're really out there. So now he goes to the barber, and he's Like, Kieran at the end, just. Just so you know, like, when it airs, when my dad watches it, I'm gonna pay with my own credit card, and then we'll just run it on his tab.

[Ben Mandelker]

I'm hilarious. So then we go and hang out with Georgia, the brand events creative strategist, and she's like. Not to, like, toot my own horn, but I genuinely feel like I am one of the most cut out people for New York that I have ever met. Guys, I went. I went through my Rolodex, and I'm the one who's best suited for the city. So congratulations to me. Yeah, I win.

[Ronnie Caram]

I have, like, the res to back it up. Okay. I've got many generations of my family be from New York York on my mom's side. Like, my parents were, like, between poor and middle class. Like, they weren't poor enough to be gross, but they weren't middle class enough for me to lose cred right now in this confessional. So, you know, basically, it was really hard. So I decided I'm gonna do whatever it takes to get to a place where I'm financially stable, unless it means washing my hands, because I know better.

[Ben Mandelker]

That's. You know what I know I'm the most cut out to live in New York because I literally brush my hair with a fork. Okay? They used to call me Ariel. And I was like, yeah, but this bitch was born with. Am I right, everyone? Am I right?

[Ronnie Caram]

Some people call it New York hustle. I call it anxiety. You know, Some people call it. I don't know, what is it when your family gives you everything? Nepotism.

[Ben Mandelker]

Privilege.

[Ronnie Caram]

Privilege. Nepotism. I call it Monday. So let's get to it.

[Ben Mandelker]

So they meet up. Charlie and Ava meet Georgia for lunch. Like, hi. And Charlie's like, I really do love Georgia. She's like my sister. And ever, if you ever need a fork, she's got one in her hair at all times. Earlier this year, Georgia would be, like, over every day, and she would, like, sleep on the couch six out of seven days. It's, like, hilarious. They keep on these, like, anecdotes that they think are, like, so fabulous, but they really have, like, no arc to them. It's like, oh, my God. I have the funniest story about Georgia. Like, sometimes she, like, comes to my apartment and she'll, like, knock on the door. And sometimes she rings the doorbell. I'm like, you're crazy.

[Ronnie Caram]

Georgia's like, literally, knock nuts. And so he tells Georgia. He's like, you're Vibing right now. And she goes, I'm going to wear something ridiculous tomorrow just to match your aura. Honestly, you're ridiculous. Aura. And Charlie goes, aura? And she goes, yeah, aura's the new vibe.

[Ben Mandelker]

That's why I only listen to music by Rita Ora.

[Ronnie Caram]

So Charlie's like, I love discovered aura.

[Ben Mandelker]

I know. I'm like, old vibe.

[Ronnie Caram]

The old vibe.

[Ben Mandelker]

Vibe was the replacement for aura, wasn't it? So then Georgia is like, oh, my God.

[Ronnie Caram]

Charlie reuses the new aura.

[Ben Mandelker]

So Georgia and Charlie are sitting in a. In their confessional together, and she's like, charlie, question. Have you ever seen When Harry Met Sally? He's like, no. Who are those two lamers? She's like, no. It's like it's this movie. And then they're like, on the couch. It's like all these couples, and they're, like, getting interviewed. And they're like, we've been married for 40 years. And I just, like, feel like we're in that right now. We're like an old married couple. Oh, my God. I'm like, so pretty prepared for this interview. Of all the people I've ever met, I think I'm the most prepared I've ever been for this interview.

[Ronnie Caram]

That sounds really old. Did they still say, like, vibe back then? She's like, yeah, it was old. So they're talking, you know, he's saying that he likes Chloe, and she says, charlie stated quite the repertoire of women. One of his first flirts was Lindsay Lohan. Excuse me, can we. Lindsay Lohan is going through a decreeping phase. Can we just let her live decreping?

[Ben Mandelker]

She's been. She's like, 95 decreed. Do we have to drag her back into this mess?

[Ronnie Caram]

Why do we need to make her look like a child molester right now? Can you just leave her alone?

[Ben Mandelker]

Charlie goes, yeah, she would pick me up from school. And like, my high school friends love that shit. They're like, we love that. Emma Stone comes by and gets you. And I'm like, it's not Emma Stone.

[Ronnie Caram]

Lindsay Lohan was dating a dude from high school that she would pick up from high school. I can't. And I believe it. It. I believe.

[Ben Mandelker]

Well, there were pictures. They showed pictures there. It was official.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, my gosh. So Georgia's like, well, yeah, you treat women very well. I've been witness. I mean, look what happened to Lindsay after she did so well, you were a good boyfriend.

[Ben Mandelker]

You totally decreed her. So Charlie's like, yeah, I hope you mean that. All jokes aside, she's like, I really mean it because I learned about relationships and Harry met Sally.

[Ronnie Caram]

And Ava's like, yeah, I haven't seen that, but whatever. And she. Charlie's like, yeah, Ava doesn't get that treatment. She goes, yeah, I open my own doors. So.

[Ben Mandelker]

So now we go over to Amira, who's a content creator and a model, and Amira's like, when I tell you New York has seen my glow up, bitch. I went to New nyu. I was busted. I was busted, crusted, dusted, not lusted for, that's for sure. Mustard. I went to rusted. More usted words.

[Ronnie Caram]

Rusted.

[Ben Mandelker]

Rusted. I was rusted like a train, which.

[Ronnie Caram]

Is just custard with an accent. Also, I love custard. So she's like, yeah, but I don't care if I was rusted, busted, dusted, tufted, lusted, puffed it. I was still that because I acted like that. So she's doing her own photo shoot. She's like, am I giving, like, camel toe? Because, like, I'm giving. Giving toy. I'm giving toei, guys.

[Ben Mandelker]

Years later, I'm that so.

[Ronnie Caram]

And then we see her in a TikTok, and she's like, hey, guys, I just bought my family a house.

[Ben Mandelker]

This house. Is that so? She says, and in all the things that I put out in the world, it's like, I want everyone to feel confident, you know, I don't want people to feel like me going to school and not being happy with myself because I was. Was busted and dusted and rusted and custard. Okay? I want you to be confident, which is that you have to have a glow up and then, you know, you're complete.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah. And she's like, okay, here's my example of being super comfy. Hey, girls, let's go pick up some sugar daddies or black tie.

[Ben Mandelker]

I actually used to be the beauty director of Paper magazine. And at the time, I was building up my own social platform, and I was like, I can't believe I'm actually been hired by a page magazine made out of paper. Do they still do that? But then I started working with Victoria's Secret, which is really a brand that's known for making women feel confident. And it's kind of like everything just kind of a blew up.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yeah, it's huge. She's huge now. So she talks to. To Brooks. She's like, hey, diva. He's like, you look gorge. Yeah. What do you think of the nose? Just got it. Do you like it? Do you like my new nose, y' all? Look at it. Look at it. He's like, diva nose. Yes. I can't know. Knows. Mother knows.

[Ben Mandelker]

By the way, she does talk about this nose, and she says, my surgeon said I actually can't get another nose job or I'll perforate my septum. But then it went viral on Tick Tock yesterday, so I think I've got to do it. It's worth. It's worth perforating the. The septum just to go viral all over again.

[Ronnie Caram]

I mean, who else has perforated septum in their Tick Tock bio?

[Ben Mandelker]

I just want people to be confident about their perforated septum. Okay? This nose used to be busted.

[Ronnie Caram]

I love when people are like, all I want is for people to be confident. That's why I put my fifth nose job on TikTok.

[Ben Mandelker]

As we all know, you can only be confident if your nose jobs go viral.

[Ronnie Caram]

So Brooks is like, one thing about Amira, as you should know, she. You should never cross her. Her friends. And she's like, Brooks is like, that friend who will, like, tell you what you don't want to hear, and he'll always do it in the sweetest way, but he'll be like, you're being unreasonable at this. And I'll say, it's my nose.

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah. If you go after Amira's friends, you're not going to see the light of day. Like, well, I mean, she's not, like, a murderer, but, like, she'll just rhyme a lot of things with rusted and crusted for a long time.

[Ronnie Caram]

So she's like, okay, like, next Tuesday, I'm, like, running my first Runway. So you'd, like, have to be there because it's like, Runway, Runway. Okay.

[Ben Mandelker]

That's insane. I'm so excited. I can't wait to go.

[Ronnie Caram]

So the producer asked who she would compare him to, and she says, david Rose from Creek. And he's like, oh, my God. Goodbye. Goodbye. I'm actually, like, out. Hold on, let me get Chloe. Chloe, she just said, I'm like, the guy from Schitt's Creek. And she's like, oh, my God.

[Ben Mandelker]

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

[Ronnie Caram]

Ha ha ha ha ha.

[Ben Mandelker]

So Brooks is like, so Charlie, he keeps, like, making jokes about taking Chloe on a date. And we see that this text exchange where Charlie's like, yo, can I place a drink order with you? Oh, sorry. I'm sorry. This is exchange.

[Ronnie Caram]

He's in a restaurant.

[Ben Mandelker]

He's talking about it. So we see him. We see him waiting for Chloe to arrive, and he orders A drink for himself. And then the waiter shows him the drink on the menu, and he's like, oh, and is it gonna, like, look like that when it comes. That's sick. This depiction of the drink on the menu is fire.

[Ronnie Caram]

So Amira's like, well, like, dating your friends, siblings, like, that never ends well. I know so many people who have literally murdered their sister after they dated their friend.

[Ben Mandelker]

Literally. You could never look more busted and crusted and rusted than when you date a sibling of your friend.

[Ronnie Caram]

The producer's like, so what celebrity does Charlie look like? And she goes, let's do it at the same time. One, two, three. Scott Disick. And he's like Barry Manilow. He's like, literally Scott Disick and Barry Manilow's body.

[Ben Mandelker]

I think he looks like a Sarsgaard. I feel like he looks like the. Do you know this one Sars guard. That's. There's the tall, tall Sars guard, and then there's the. I think it's a Peter Sars guard who's with Maggie Gyllenol. I feel like he looks like that. That Sars guard.

[Ronnie Caram]

The shorter one?

[Ben Mandelker]

Yeah, the shorter one. There's, like, one who's, like, tall, blonde, and Satuesque was in Big Little Lies who's like. He's like.

[Ronnie Caram]

That's Alex.

[Ben Mandelker]

Beautiful Nordic.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yes.

[Ben Mandelker]

And then there's, like, normal Murderbot.

[Ronnie Caram]

Now he's hot. And then. Yeah, then there's the one that's like, no. Then there's also Steve Buscemi. Sarsgar, the really tall one who has Steve Buscemi face. Oh, there's.

[Ben Mandelker]

I didn't know there was another Sars girl. Well, there's also the dad, Stellan.

[Ronnie Caram]

I think there's, like, 10 brothers, because I think Skarsgard brothers keeps. They're like Hemsworth, so they just keep coming out.

[Ben Mandelker]

So many SARS guards.

[Ronnie Caram]

So many.

[Ben Mandelker]

So Amira's like, okay, Barry Manilow. He's gonna hate this. By the way, who's Barry Manilow? I'm surprised that Amira knew who Barry Manilow was.

[Ronnie Caram]

I'm not surprised that Brook did, though. Brooks did, because that's hilarious. By the way, Steve Buscemi face is Bill Sarsgaard. And then there's Skarsgard, Valter Skarsgard, Sam Skarsgard. And you know what? They didn't even put Alexander up here on the. Oh, yeah, yeah. He's the main.

[Ben Mandelker]

Are they actually related or this Just a.

[Ronnie Caram]

They're all related. I'm telling you. There's like 9 million brothers.

[Ben Mandelker]

Wow. All these scars guard. Because Bill Skarsgard was in it, right? Wasn't he it. Relatives? Alexander?

[Ronnie Caram]

Yes. Yeah, he. He plays all the creepy roles.

[Ben Mandelker]

Okay, so Peter Skarsgard.

[Ronnie Caram]

Not related.

[Ben Mandelker]

Because he's not. He's not a relative.

[Ronnie Caram]

Peter Sarsgaard. I don't know who's. Yeah, he is. He's.

[Ben Mandelker]

Oh, you know why? No, no, no, no. Because these. All those people are Scarsgard and Peter is Sarsgaard.

[Ronnie Caram]

I thought that was the scars Guard brother.

[Ben Mandelker]

No, he's a Sars guard, not a Skarsgard.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, Jesus.

[Ben Mandelker]

All this time, I thought they were all. They were all. Yeah. All this time I thought he was.

[Ronnie Caram]

Oh, no, I wasn't thinking of him. This guy's such a weirdo. Peter Sarsgaard. Oh, God. He always plays such weird people. He played one of the Lawyers and Presumed Innocent, that new show. Oh, no, I'm thinking of. Okay, Sars.

[Ben Mandelker]

Tell me that. Tell me that Charlie is not Peter Sarsgaard. Look at Peter Sarsgaard. That's what Charlie is.

[Ronnie Caram]

I'm thinking of Luke Hemsworth. You see, I was thinking of another Hemsworth brother who was on Westworld.

[Ben Mandelker]

I'm not going to give Charlie any Hemsworth. I'm not willing to. I'm not willing to give him that gene pool. I'm giving him a Peter Sarsgaard. That's where he. That's where he is for me. Me.

[Ronnie Caram]

Okay. Congratulations. You've reached the end of part one. Of a two part recap for part two. Go look for the recap that says part two. See you over there, suckers.

[Ben Mandelker]

Watch what Crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alison King.

[Ronnie Caram]

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[Ben Mandelker]

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[Ronnie Caram]

She can run my country. It's Angie McGovern.

[Ben Mandelker]

It's always automatic with Ashley Auto. Put your hands together for Carly Clap.

[Ronnie Caram]

Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt. We never miss her call. It's Diane call.

[Ben Mandelker]

Aaron McNicholas. She don't miss no Trickolus Hava Nagila Weber. You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones. I go, you go. We all go for Hugo Jamie. She has no last namey.

[Ronnie Caram]

She's our kind of mess. It's Jennifer Messer. Sip some scotch with Jessica Trotch.

[Ben Mandelker]

She's our favorite streamer.

[Ronnie Caram]

Caroline Peacock, she gets an A. It's Kelly B. Kristen the Piston Anderson. Get a bee in your bonnet with Lacey B. Que sera, sera Whatever will be will Lauren Silsby Bringing the funk.

[Ben Mandelker]

It's Leslie Plunkett.

[Ronnie Caram]

She gets a name from us It's Lindsey D. Let's give a Kisserino to Lisalino. Fresh as a daisy. It's Maisie McKinley winnery. We love her on the rocks It's Melissa Cox. Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the.

[Ben Mandelker]

Berg this is Living with Michelle Vivian.

[Ronnie Caram]

I love a y' all. Olivia Williamson. Tastier than Flanderson. It's Rachel Manderson.

[Ben Mandelker]

She sure is swell. It's Raquel.

[Ronnie Caram]

Yes, we canna.

[Ben Mandelker]

It's Savannah Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman. Let's share with Sharon Eldridge the Bay Area batches bitches and our super premium.

[Ronnie Caram]

Sponsors She's VVIP It's Amanda V. Can't lose when you're with Amy Baldwin.

[Ben Mandelker]

Somebody get us 10cc's of Betsy MD.

[Ronnie Caram]

We'Re taking the gold with Brenda Silva.

[Ben Mandelker]

Let'S get real with Caitlyn o' Neal.

[Ronnie Caram]

Don'T get salty with Christine Pepper can't have a meal without the Emily sides Let's go into the woods with Guy.

[Ben Mandelker]

Tubbs who, what, why, where?

[Ronnie Caram]

And Gwen Pentland it's our star queen.

[Ben Mandelker]

It's Queen Laifa Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall Hail the cork master the master of the cork Jennifer Corcoran we got our wish It's Jen Plish she's not harsh She's Jill Hirsch She's a little bit loony Junie Knock, knock, knocking on Katie Manock's door My Favorite Murdo Karen McMurdo we love him madly It's Kyle Pod Shadley in the study with a candlestick It's Leslie Peacock we're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Baron She's a whiz It's Liz Sarthi always killing it It's Lola Al Kalani the.

[Ronnie Caram]

Incredible edible Matthew Sisters she eases our woes it's Melissa St. Rose we're on the floor with Molly Dorset There's a chance of meatballs It's Rebecca Cloud she's.

[Ben Mandelker]

The queen bee It's Sarah Lemke we.

[Ronnie Caram]

Cannot tell a lie It's Sarah Tell.

[Ben Mandelker]

Of son Shannon out of a can and Anthony Come on Check your body, baby do the Sydney Congdon let's take off with Tamla Plain it's always a.

[Ronnie Caram]

Good time when you're wasting time with Bravo she ain't no shrinking violet Cootard we love you guys if you like, watch what crappens you can listen ad free right now by joining Wondery in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short [e-mail] survey.