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Ben
Wondry subscribers can listen to Watch what Crappens ad free right now. Join Wondri in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. The HBO original series the Gilded Age is back and so is the official companion podcast. Are you curious about how they brought Gilded Age New York to life?
Diallo
I don't understand. Which bit is not clear?
Ben
None of it is clear. Want to know where the writers branched off from history? Well, when you set your mind on a thing, no one can stop you. I take that as a compliment.
Diallo
Watch or listen to the official Gilded.
Ben
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Diallo
There'S so much that happens?
Ben
Who cares what happens when there's so much that happens? Hi everyone. Welcome back. This is part two of a two part recap. If you're wondering where part one was, well, go check in the feed and be sure to subscribe. So that way you always get your episodes. But enough of that, let's get right back into the episode. So then we go to this place called Puttery and Kiki and her son Shamar and his friend Neary, they are at the second indoor miniature golf course.
Diallo
Yeah, we know these places.
Ben
Yeah. Yeah, they're fun, fun times. I enjoy them. I love miniature golf.
Diallo
I actually love miniature golf. Can I say I fre. Love it.
Ben
Me too.
Diallo
One of my, my first dates with my wife Brittany was. It was mini golf and we had some, we had some memorable times on, on, you know, near the Dragon and the windmill, which I will. There's no need to go into that. But yeah, a solid mini golf course is like always fun for me.
Ben
Yeah, I, one thing that I am upset about is that I don't feel like there's any good miniature golf courses in Los Angeles.
Diallo
Really? You know what?
Ben
Not even Boomers? Okay. Not even the Castle.
Diallo
Castle Park. Listen, Castle Park's not great.
Ben
Yeah.
Diallo
But it, it, it does, it does Satisfy a little bit.
Ben
I hear there's a good place in Pasadena, actually. That's actually only nine holes. Maybe, but okay, it's a.
Diallo
Hey, it's the quality of the holes.
Ben
It's. As I always say, it's the quality.
Diallo
Of the whole quality of the hole.
Ben
That's what Jax Taylor says, but I think. So here's my issue, if I may. Yeah, I know we have a lot of episode to go through, but I. I think this is important. I love a real whimsical miniature golf course. And I think that technically there's a difference between putt putt and miniature golf. I think like, putt putt is actually kind of a standardized course. Or maybe it's like, it's all about like ang. Like blocks and angles, whereas I think that might be putt putt and. Or maybe that's miniature golf. And putt putt can get super whimsical where you go into windmills and stuff like that. And what I don't like. Here's what I don't like. I do not like when you are approaching a miniature golf place and you see the windmills and you see the goofy things and you're like, oh, this.
Diallo
Is gonna be great.
Ben
This is gonna be great. And then when you get there, those are just things that are like on the side of like pedestrian horses, you know. And so when you're playing and you're just playing on the typical. Like, it's basically like an L shaped thing with some angles on it and like all these fun dinosaurs and windmills you're not even interacting with. And I'm.
Diallo
False advertising.
Ben
Listen, that, like, I want to. I want. When I play miniature golf, I want. I want to be like Flintstones or something where like that ball is going up the back of the dinosaur and then dropping into at least one Rube Goldberg machine.
Diallo
It's like mousetrap.
Ben
I need to. I need to like be interacting with all the fun stuff.
Diallo
I think that's why I do like castle. Look, Castle Park's got some. Some holes for sure.
Ben
Yeah, that's my memory.
Diallo
But some of their holes definitely have like windmill and ball drops in here and it rolls around here.
Ben
It's got some good stuff, like all sorts of funny contraptions and wildness. And like, there's a hole over here and a hole over here. I like, I don't want to deal with any others. You know what's. Sorry, one last observation about this.
Diallo
No, no, no. I didn't know we were going here. Didn't know we're going full mini golf.
Ben
Yeah, I'm triggered. Well, honestly, because nothing really happens in this scene. So this is just.
Diallo
This is one of those scenes. I. I swear to God, anytime I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm a father. So I. The scenes with kids are almost uniformly boring.
Ben
Yeah, almost always.
Diallo
Because nobody can say real conversations and yes. Fun to see Kiki fall into the ball pit dressed like a supermodel and that kind of stuff. But, like, that's the most you're going to get out of those scenes. Like, they're just missing.
Ben
I love that they're giving Kiki more personal stories, especially as a friend of. That's almost unheard of.
Diallo
Yeah.
Ben
But this was not a terribly interesting scene. It's cool that her son seems great and his friend.
Diallo
Perfectly fine. Yeah, Perfectly fine scene. Perfectly, perfectly fine.
Ben
Arthur, say perfectly fine, son.
Diallo
Perfectly fine.
Ben
It's fun. But the miniature golf hole that I hate, the one that I hate them, actually, I don't hate it, but I think it's the hardest one of all. Tell me if you feel this way. It's usually found on the more pedestrian, like, non whimsical ones. Yeah, there's a hole, of course.
Diallo
Yeah.
Ben
And it's surrounded by like a round. Almost like. Like, it looks like a little volcano where it's like round and.
Diallo
And there's a little bit of a cone.
Ben
Yeah, like a cone with a hole in the center. Yeah, that. Because you have to hit it perfectly. Because if you hit it too soft, it like rolls up and then around and away in a different angle, direction and power. Everything.
Diallo
Everything has to be perfect. I totally agree. That's the hardest one of all, I think the one that I dislike the most is, like, when there's like a hole and you think it has to go in that hole and down to a lower level.
Ben
I love that.
Diallo
But then when you get up to that hole, you see there's actually another hole behind like a brick over here, which is the preferred hole. You're just like, oh, man. You can tell me there were two holes.
Ben
That's true. But I have to say one. One thing I love is when you.
Diallo
I'm surprised you don't like Boomers. I feel like Boomers don't. They usually have all the whimsical holes.
Ben
No, no, they. They are. They are whimsy teasers. They. My memory is that Boomers has all the stuff next to the. Next to the holes, but not actually on the.
Diallo
You know what? I'm glad I never Pulled over on the i5. Cuz that. That I always see that when I'm driving to, like, Huntington beach or something. I'm always like, man, one of these days, I should have, like, the time to go and do that. I'm reminded of Marisol's. You know, sometimes, if it's. What is it? If it's good for the whole, but it ain't good for the soul.
Ben
Well, what's good for the whole is good for the soul.
Diallo
Like, that was written. Right? One of the producers handed that 1 to percent 100%.
Ben
What's. What's good for the hurricane is good for the pain.
Diallo
If it rhymes. A producer wrote it.
Ben
Yeah. Anyway, long story short, I.
Diallo
Too late.
Ben
I love. I know. Too late. I love. I love when. When you do hit, like, a ball into a hole, and then you have to, like, it comes down to a whole other level. Like, that's the best, like, fun. That's just fun.
Diallo
It's just fun.
Ben
Okay, well, anyway, this is a great scene. So Kiki Lara comes over. They talk about kids. She wants to be in a good place with. With Shemar. Kiki calls her dad, and it was great.
Diallo
So then I got to say, if shemar were, like, 10 years older, Larsa would definitely be hitting on him.
Ben
100.
Diallo
Like, the name Shemar alone. I feel like she'd be like.
Ben
We just have, like, a connection. Like, oh, 19.
Diallo
Oh, okay, that's. Even. Even. I can't do that.
Ben
He's young, but he's, like, wise beyond his years. He's just, like, such a gentle soul. We just laugh. We laugh and laugh and laugh.
Diallo
Isn't that messed up? That was the first thing I thought. I was like, lars is sitting at a table with Shemar. Watch it.
Ben
Yeah. Watch out. I don't think she's going for nearly, though. Unfortunately, I don't think that's gonna happen. So God bless him. So then we go over to Stephanie and Massoud. So this is Massoud's first big scene.
Diallo
Yes.
Ben
Husband. Husband thing. Did you feel. I like Massoud? This was. I couldn't tell what was going on with the scene. Masood was acting, right?
Diallo
He was acting.
Ben
It's 100, I thought.
Diallo
So I did the whole thing. This whole thing felt like a setup to show, like, you know, to introduce.
Ben
Yeah, yeah. It's, like, wackiness, but so they. They're. So Masoud and Stephanie are there, and Stephanie's in full boss baby mode. Full, like, like, okay, we. We have to look at the rooms. We're gonna look at the rooms. And he's like, but I only want to look at one for one for no reason. But I only want to look at one.
Diallo
No more than one scene needs tension.
Ben
We need to establish stakes.
Diallo
Exactly. From the top.
Ben
Hello, my name is Masoud. And at one room, that's all I will need to see. God forbid we look at second room. So she's telling us. She's really trying to sell us on Massoud. She goes, you know, so many people think that, like, because my husband is older, like much older, like 45 years older, that, like he's older at heart, but that's so not true. Let's look at some footage. Let's show the footage of him in a backwards hat. Okay. And we see the sky.
Diallo
Totally.
Ben
Like, you know that meme of like Steve Buscemi with like, yeah, hey, fellow young people.
Diallo
Exactly.
Ben
Is that from what is that from 30 Rock or community or what's that from?
Diallo
I thought it was a commercial. Wasn't it maybe completely wrong. I thought that was a commercial from a little bit back.
Ben
But it could be, you know, someone will tell us. But yeah, he's just like in that hat and he's like doing some sort of like, tick tock dance. And I was like, oh, this is so.
Diallo
This is so sweaty. Really sweaty. You guys. Don't do this to us, Massoud. We'll remember. We'll remember him dancing when the with the lawsuit started in next season.
Ben
Yeah, exactly. He's like, I want to listen to some Roni Chaplin. I'm like, okay, Chappelle Roan. So she's like, yeah. And then Larsa met my husband and we went to dinner and after dinner she texted me. I was like, oh, my God, you're the old lady of a relationship. Your husband is so fun and you're not letting him live his life. That's totally me because I have to talk to men, you know, 80 men at a time. So they're just like talking about like the. She's talking to Vanessa, this employee, and they're looking at models in this. In this unit. And here she goes again saying, you know, every time we go to Saint Bar St.
Diallo
Bars. Yeah.
Ben
I'm telling you, dude, you know, Masudi loves animals. He loves animals.
Diallo
Setting it up, by the way. Setting it up because these dogs have to eventually in the room. So we gotta establish he loves animals.
Ben
He loves animals.
Diallo
He's other wrong here.
Ben
And here's how you know he loves animals. Because every time we go to Saint Barts, there's turtles and so the suit goes to the grocery store and buys the muffins and leaves muffins all around the streets of St. Bart's first off.
Diallo
I've never owned a turtle. This was, this was very informative to me. I didn't know that you could feed turtles with muffins.
Ben
I didn't know that muffins were their preferred treat. That that's what they.
Diallo
I didn't know that that was what you'd buy. When you own the turtles, you own muffins, the muff.
Ben
The turtles are like, can we get some leaves around here? Why do they keep giving us these?
Diallo
I believe that there's something more, more turtle friendly than a muffin.
Ben
Also, please don't leave muffins on my street.
Diallo
Who's leaving all these muffins?
Ben
You know, we have a little bird feeder outside and when we moved in here, Dom got a bird feeder and he filled up little nuts and everything. He's like, oh my God, the birds will come here. Cuz he loves animals too. Although he would never leave muffins around.
Diallo
S parts in his case, I believe it. It's not just setting up a scene.
Ben
Yeah, he like, loves animals. Like he was going to do like animal science if dance didn't happen.
Diallo
Bry wants to get a. Oh, I'm sorry.
Ben
Go ahead. Yeah, well, I was just going to say like this bird feeder put all this stuff in there and the first thing is a rat. A rat shows up. So, like, I guarantee most of those muffins were eaten by rats.
Diallo
They're definitely eaten by rats. When I was growing up, my father was into birds. He had a bird feeder in the backyard and he was just like waiting for these birds to come in. And they did for a little bit. But then we started hearing all these gunshots. And when you grow up in Atlanta, sometimes your neighbor's from the country. And our neighbors, the Lawsons, they were from outside of Macon, Georgia. And it turned out that Melvin Lawson was shooting at the birds with his shotgun. And so my dad goes over, he's like, melvin, stop shooting the birds. I want to see the birds. And you're shooting the cardinals and the blue jays and all these beautiful birds to shoot. Fun fact, the Lawsons used to. They used to eat the squirrels.
Ben
Really?
Diallo
They did, because that was a thing. That was a thing in the south, you know, where they were from. So like, you know, I'll never forget Grandma Lawson. I'm sure she's gone now, but God rest her soul, she was like, I.
Ben
Wish girl meets hardy.
Diallo
She Was just sitting in the living room watching cable, and she was like, I wish somebody go out there and kill me a squirrel. I went over the house one time. You could see little paws sticking out of the pot. It was crazy for real life in life in metropolitan Atlanta because it really is a mixture of city mouse and country mouse. You know what I mean? Like, some people are moving there from New York or L. A. Some people are moving from, you know, Dallas, Georgia. You know, it's crazy.
Ben
The not pause coming out of the stockpot.
Diallo
I'm serious, man. I saw it and I could not believe it, but I just kept walking.
Ben
Why didn't they get that? Like, that's almost like a cartoon. That's almost like. Because I feel like, realistically, if I'm cooking something, I'm not letting a pod dangle out.
Diallo
Yeah, but I want to remember the cook. There was like at least two little pause to get out of that pot, and the steam was coming out. So just from a. Just from an OCD point of view, I'm like, push the pause in so that you're not steaming. Also, how many freaking squirrels, really? They were actually brown, Paul, so they might have been chipmunks. This is not the diversion everybody was expecting.
Ben
When you said that, like, you. That, you know, you had these birds coming to the bird feeder, then all of a sudden you heard gunshots. I was like, wow, I'm glad that's what those birds weren't carrying. It's like now they were smarter. Yeah. These days. These days, unfortunately, everyone has a gun, even the birds. So anyway, the point is that they. They look at this one model unit. So it's. They're like, showing off to America to be like, come, come live at Shoma bazaar, wherever they are. And then they're like. And then she's like, I want to see another unit. No, no, no, don't. Please don't look at other units.
Diallo
Take me to another one.
Ben
I don't need to see another unit. Must do Tick tock challenge.
Diallo
Let's post once a day to please algorithm.
Ben
He's like, how do you do new gen Z heart sandal. So then they go into the other. They go into the other model apartment, and there are two dogs. Because there were two. We didn't set up that, like, at the top of the scene, there's mention that, like, because the hurricane. Two people abandoned two dogs right at the complex. And so they put them into an empty unit, but they went in and it actually is not empty because it has. It's a Model unit.
Diallo
Right.
Ben
And the dog has shot on the.
Diallo
Bed and appeared on the pillow all over the place. Yeah.
Ben
So this is where I was confused, because I'm like, I understand, like, acting to set up a scene, but are you really gonna, like. But you're gonna have the poop and the pee, too, on your own model?
Diallo
I. What I didn't get was like, again, I was like, you leave these dogs alone. It's not like they have, like, keys to let themselves out. So, like, what do you kind of expect, you know? Like, yeah, they were in there for hours. But I think all this was just to show how much he loves animals.
Ben
I think so.
Diallo
Because he doesn't really hold it against them.
Ben
Yeah.
Diallo
And she's the one who's freaking out because, you know, she's serious business lady.
Ben
Mm. She's very serious. But the thing that really disturbed me on the scene was that when it ended, there was a shot of a lady cleaning up the mess, and she was. I don't know if, you know, she had, like, some Lysol, and she was, like, spritzing the sheets and wiping the sheets down with lice. I'm like, lady, put that in the washer. You are not putting. Do not Lysol the shit. No, that's. That is all going to washer if they might even be thrown out.
Diallo
That is not. That's not going to do anything.
Ben
What are you doing? This is not a tile. This is not. This is not granite. What are you. Did you do. You saw that she had the little spritz bottle.
Diallo
Like, I'm just realizing that you're totally right.
Ben
This is the sort of management that's behind the Showma group. Then I'm sorry, I cannot endorse them on Zillow. But she does tell a story about how one positive thing that came out of the hurricane is that her sisters texted her and were like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. Are you okay? Are you alive? Are you safe? Are you safe? And then when she was like, I'm fine. They were like, oh, never mind. Bye.
Diallo
You know, the way she phrased it, it actually confused me a little bit because it sounded like she was saying that they. The sisters who have not contacted her, called her parents to ask how they were doing. Was that at all you're reading?
Ben
I. I'm not sure. I didn't think about it as hard enough because I think I was so distracted by the Lysol situation.
Diallo
You're still thinking about. I was like, show them I'm not a good look yeah.
Ben
All that defecation. I'm not sure.
Diallo
It sounded like they called her parents to check on them and then they texted with her.
Ben
Maybe that's what it was.
Diallo
That was the vibe I got. But you could have been totally right.
Ben
I also feel like she's gonna be the sort of housewife that's gonna be a little slippery with the truth. Like. Oh, she says it one way. So. No, what I meant was this. Well, actually this is what it really was. Which is also very Bronwyn, you know.
Diallo
So now I took to Bronwyn pretty quick.
Ben
I really love Bronwyn and I thought she was a great housewife. I think she's gonna have a terrible next season. I think she's gonna have.
Diallo
It's always the season two.
Ben
I think she, like, they're gonna.
Diallo
I feel like Denise came on, you know, she was having so much fun. Season one. In season two, everybody got out knives for her.
Ben
Yeah. And I think they're gonna get out knives for Bronwyn.
Diallo
Yeah.
Ben
But she's also has some like wind in her sails. So she's gonna be a little. I think she's a little loose.
Diallo
She's gonna get too comfortable. And then the.
Ben
Yeah. And the audience is already kind of like turning against her anyway.
Diallo
So like, what happened? I don't know if I missed that.
Ben
Just they think her. She's like cocky or like full of, you know. So I think I still like her. Yeah, she's a great choice.
Diallo
But I agree. I think season two is going to be hard for Brian.
Ben
Have a bad at. It's going to be really bad.
Diallo
That's all it takes, really. Right.
Ben
Yeah. It's time for a commercial.
Diallo
It's time for a Grappens commercial.
Ben
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Diallo
Actually wear on repeat.
Ben
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Diallo
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Diallo
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Ben
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Diallo
I've got some really sweet pieces from there. One of my favorites is a leather jacket that I'm going to keep forever.
Ben
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Diallo
Yeah, she's. She doesn't play villain well.
Ben
No, because.
Diallo
Because a villain has to be sort of looking like they're enjoying. Like Lars has got that malevolent grin.
Ben
Yeah.
Diallo
So, you know, the second she says that really mean thing to you, she's having a blast. But Julia doesn't have it in her.
Ben
And Julia, that's like Julia's Persona, like what makes her work on the show is that she's actually this kind of like, like daffy sort of like out there person that's kind of like a, it's like a, like a little bit of a different, a contrast from the other personalities.
Diallo
She, she likes that farm life. You know what I mean? Like, you know, that's. She's not. No, she's not talking about Saint Barks in her, in her Birkin bag.
Ben
Yes. So they sit down.
Diallo
I love this scene, by the way. Yeah, Gertie, it was the scene I'd sort of been. I feel like every episode you're waiting for that scene. And for me, this was that scene in this episode. Especially since this one, I. I sort of expected it. The week after the water toss.
Ben
Yeah.
Diallo
Didn't happen. The week after that didn't happen. It finally happened in episode five. I also really need to see a. A super edit of all the times that the waiter comes over. Oh, my God, that worst possible moment.
Ben
I was gonna strangle that waiter. Like, I was like, every time they were, like, about to, like, have a meaningful exchange, he was like, would you guys like a new slice of lime for your Diet Coke? It's like, why are you coming over there?
Diallo
So many times there's. It's like a cavalcade of characters. Sometimes there's just that waiter that just draws all the attention. Like you said, they come over the worst possible time. But I secretly. I love those scenes. Those are my favorite housewives scenes.
Ben
So. So they sit down, and Gertie is like, thank you for the invitation. I got your message that you sent me the date after. You know, when you sent it, she.
Diallo
She was so robotic. Like, yes. You could tell she's still mad as hell.
Ben
Oh, 100%.
Diallo
Because she's got, like, her. Her code is on. Like, her code is, I am here, and this is business. And everything I'm going to say is absolutely truncated.
Ben
I. This is business. And I say that with authority because I just went to the stock exchange. Thanks for not saying anything about it.
Diallo
For a business goes down. I rang the bell. It was a. It was a bad day. The Went down. It was a red day.
Ben
It was the day the tariffs were announced by Py.
Diallo
Nvidia now became like, cnbc.
Ben
Buy low, sell high. I've learned so many things. Supply and demand. So.
Diallo
So she's.
Ben
She's.
Diallo
She's hot.
Ben
She's. She's ready. And she. She comes in, she says, you know, I got your. I got your text message. And Julia's like. And I meant eat. I mean, it is I. It is written with open heart. Also, it was written by goat. I wasn't sure if Gertie was. I seem to remember feeling like Gertie. I wasn't sure if Gertie was able to say everything she needed to say and for Julia to understand it, because I think that waiter kept on coming by.
Diallo
Well, not only the waiter, but this gets to, like, one of the reasons I love Miami. One of the things I love about this show is I thought about it a lot because I knew I was coming here today. It's. These women are trying to talk about nuance and feelings, but none of them are speaking their native language. Like, that is insane.
Ben
That is such an amazing point.
Diallo
Think about it. Like, I always wondered, like, these international soccer teams, like, if you go to Real Madrid, three of the guys are from Europe, three are from Africa, two are from Asia, two might be American. They all had to speak some common language just to play a game, and that's a game with rules. Now imagine that these same dudes at the all speak all these different languages, but they have to convey something as nuanced as how you made me feel.
Ben
Wow, you're blowing my mind right now.
Diallo
It really came up to me. It really came out to me actually, in the scene. One of my favorite parts of the scene, when Gertie's recounting. It's actually a flashback. It's when they're in the heat of the argument and Gertie says, well, you said I referenced it. She's like, no, I said, I never said we are. I said we were. Learn the past tense. Like, oh, these people don't speak the same language.
Ben
Literally don't. Yeah.
Diallo
She's like, learn the past tense while you're at it. Learn future. Perfect.
Ben
Learn future.
Diallo
Conditional. I will have finished this, I will have finished this food. You know, like, it's just like, no, these people are trying to convey all these complex emotions. They don't have, they don't have the same rules, they don't have the same language. It's insane.
Ben
That's actually a really fascinating and interesting point. I mean, yeah, I, I think, I don't know of, of the, every other housewife franchise.
Diallo
They all basically are from, you know, they're all speaking English. But this is the one where like, you know, technically this person is speaking a dialect of, of French where she might be growing up. This one speaks Spanish, as she said, you know, like, yeah, there's, they're all speaking English ultimately.
Ben
I mean, and who knows what Lars, I mean, what Lisa's ever saying.
Diallo
Who knows where Larson's from?
Ben
Larsa? Yeah, yeah. Well, I don't know if, if, if Larsa was like, if English is her first language or not. She's a Siri. Is Larsa Assyrian?
Diallo
Is it Lebanese?
Ben
Lebanese.
Diallo
We could look it up probably.
Ben
I'm not sure what her. But it is, so. That is such a good point. I mean, a lot of them, I mean, yes, it's, it's not their first language. A lot of them are obviously like, like beyond fluent, but there is something to that. Like, I, I, I imagine they're trying their best.
Diallo
I mean, like, there was literally one part where like, Julia was struggling even. Even when Alexia always says like, you know, I don't know what Todd's going to do. The ball is on his court and I'm like in his court. And she's like all the balls on his court. And I'm like in his court just like. I'm just like. It's not her first language. She could speak Spanish way better than me.
Ben
But there, to be fair, there are a lot of English speakers that will also on. On his court or on accident or. Or what's the other one that's really.
Diallo
Oh, on accident. Absolutely.
Ben
What's the one that's really big? Well, good. Well all those fun things.
Diallo
Yeah, yeah, those are, those are. By the way, that's one of my favorite. I do get that email once a day. Like you know, like some kind of grammar funny thing. Yeah and I love grammar grammar funny thing. It's always grammar funny thing is great newsletter but here's. Here's. Here's what for the listeners. Every day versus every day. And if. If something happens continuously day after day after day, use every day is two words. And if it's every day, just remember that every day a single word means common, regular, like he's your everyday kind of person. You know, like that's seems like that's what I'm bringing to the world too. Sorry.
Ben
Good.
Diallo
Nobody cares.
Ben
It's a good. That's a good tidbit you could use every day.
Diallo
I'll come in once an episode just with. Just with grammar tricks with the grammar font. Sorry about that.
Ben
You can come in every day to do that.
Diallo
I would do. Dude. Some people like I will say again, this is one of my favorite scenes in the episode and I'm. I'm glad that they kind of, you know, not. Not to. They kind of got to some kind of like day like.
Ben
Yeah, I'm glad it wasn't one of those things where they don't get anywhere and we have to do like three more episodes like cuz that it really is stressful when that happens. So Julia says, well, I don't know how we got what to what happened last night. I'm like, I can tell you specifically exactly how it got to that you basically had a meltdown because of zoom Link didn't work and you turned into a giant thing and you vilified Gertie and you got mad that she got upset that there was no seat for her at some influencer dinner on a cruise so she went and ate somewhere else.
Diallo
And that cruise thing is like so Convoluted at this point to hear them tell the story. They tell two completely different stories.
Ben
100% difference.
Diallo
Julia's saying, hey, you asked to come on the cruise. Gertie's like, I would never come on that cruise. You asked me to come on the cruise, Cruz. Like, I kind of believe Gertie. I believe Gertie more because, you know, it just. It doesn't all line up. And I also think that, like, Julia, you know, but.
Ben
And. But Julia's whole thing is, like, she was there to support me because Martina was homesick, and she has to support me for making the decision to not.
Diallo
Be with Martina while she's Martina.
Ben
No, I don't think that really works. And, like, also, if she's there to support you, why didn't you have a seat for her at the dinner? Like, why didn't you insist? Like. Like, this is your emotional support.
Diallo
Friends, listen, I think we can all sympathize with Gertie if you go on a cruise, of all things. And this is the reason I've actually never taken a cruise, because I've already got to feel, like, trapped in with the people who you're with. But if you go there to be a friend and then you're not even sitting at the table with that being like, this is total.
Ben
Like, if I were Julia, I would actually not go to whatever cockamamie dinner this was and sit with Gertie, like, that's your friend.
Diallo
Like, why else is Gertie even there? But according to Julia, Gertie was begging to go on this cruise, which I don't.
Ben
And then her and was taking photos. I'm like, you're a real housewife. What is. What is this?
Diallo
This is not new territory.
Ben
Yes, exactly. You were not, like, some celebrated pop star like Samantha Fox in 1988. Okay, I don't know where I went there. So Julia's basically saying, like, I don't know how we got here, but I am very sorry for throwing the water at you, and I have no excuse for it, and I hope that you can accept my apology. I would have given you this apology over zoom, but we know how you do it.
Diallo
I know you're not good at zoom.
Ben
Sorry, sorry. Triggered. Triggered. She's like, well, I am literally completely blindsided. I feel completely backstabbed. And the waiter's like, hello there. What would you like? Oh, hello. I'll have the croquettes, please. So Julia's like, I shared with you something very private about my face lift, and you share with everyone. I know. So apparently the facelift was a secret, which, by the way, whoever is Julia's surgeon, I never would have detected it.
Diallo
No, I. I didn't see it either.
Ben
Never saw it either.
Diallo
So, you know, I say be proud of it.
Ben
Like, that's great work.
Diallo
That's usually the thing that they brag about. They don't brag about it, but it's.
Ben
Understood, I guess, because so much for a thing is like, nature and animals and like. Like natural. Natural things that to get a facelift may feel like dereliction of duty.
Diallo
Yeah, I didn't. You know, Kuda. I guess you're right. Kudos to whoever did the. I didn't. I didn't assume that there had been a facelift, but I did hear when she said that, and I was just like, that's gonna be an issue. That's good. Yeah, that's gonna be the one.
Ben
Yeah. Okay. The things that you can't talk about, obviously, are children. The things that are off limit are children, but also facelifts.
Diallo
And my business.
Ben
And my business. Children. My business and face love.
Diallo
You do not talk about my husband, and you do not talk about my business. I mean, like, it's. Get the song going.
Ben
A person I trusted with something very personal when I shared this information with you, but you threw it back at me, and you betrayed my trust. So what kind of friend are you? So. Well, I felt very betrayed by you as well, so you have to understand that my reply was matching what I was getting from you. And again, just to remind everyone, this is a fight about a zoom call and some sort of cruise. Yeah. Seating on a cruise.
Diallo
That's where. That's what's brought us here.
Ben
But Julia's upset because Gertie's, like, weaponizing this face, this facelift. I think it's more than that. She added the facelift. But saying, like, you were a bad wife to Martina, who was ailing at the moment.
Diallo
Yeah, that. You know, let's. Let's. That's. That's an ugly thing to say. I mean, like, you know, but, you know, in the heat of the moment, you know, Gertie. Gertie fights back, you know?
Ben
Yeah, yeah. It was, you know, it was a bit backhanded against March. Yeah. See.
Diallo
There was a volley. No, I'm sorry. The ball was in her court.
Ben
Yeah, she really served up a good.
Diallo
Oh, gosh.
Ben
A good diss. A good diss on that one. Yeah.
Diallo
I did not come over with my puns.
Ben
Yeah, well, it's okay. It's. It's okay, okay. It's getting worse. So Gertie's like, well, no, I apologize. I'm sorry for the words that I use and for being literally unhinged because I never want to be the same predicament again. And I appreciate you acknowledging that. And this was a night I wish I never happened. And I tried my best to say, please, not today. Please stop it. No, not today. Not within three days of when I went to the stock exchange and no one even said anything about it. I'm still riding the high of a bell. A bell in New York City when.
Diallo
I changed the course of the entire economy and none of my friends showed.
Ben
Up when I single handedly pulled us out of recession.
Diallo
Exactly.
Ben
I fixed everything. But she's like, but she's like, you know, it was embarrassing and humiliating and, and she's like, oh, emotion got over me and I am sorry for that. But no, but this is when I said, no, we are not going to do this, and I did something bad. But it was my point. But it was my point to prove. And I mean, Gertie's I think pretty good about saying, like, I was trying to hurt you, but that's because you hurt me first. You were coming for me first. And like, it wasn't good what I did, but just know, like, I was upset and this is why I was upset.
Diallo
Totally.
Ben
Yeah. And then, then she has, she has like five monologues in a row. She's like, oh, yeah, we're not friends. But I know this about you. Like, I came out and like, look, it's something I knew. And it was like, my good friend was like, hello, it's me, it's me. Hello. Do you remember me? Do you remember me? And you said, but we weren't friends. But I'm like, we were good friends. Because if our good friends, you wouldn't tell me about the facelift. We were not good friends. But you told me we're good friends. So now we work at friends. Julia's like, I don't follow. Just disagree. Can we move on? I don't know.
Diallo
She's like, I do not follow the these words. Yeah, yeah.
Ben
Julia just kind of is like in a place of what he's done. He's done.
Diallo
Like, she's, yeah, you can't, you can't declare that. But like you said, I, I was happy that they came to a realistic resolution because, yeah, I, I, I would.
Ben
Have liked Julia to have acknowledged that she was having a massive overreaction about the Zoom link. I feel like that's what was. Not what was missing for me, the.
Diallo
Specificity of what I did wrong.
Ben
Yeah. Because the cruise ship, we can't really litigate that one because we don't really know.
Diallo
Julia's more apologizing for throwing the water than sort of what led to all this tension in the first place.
Ben
Right. But I would have, like, I just kind of wish they had buried the hatch about the zoom link because that's just too stupid to have.
Diallo
Like, that is a dumb.
Ben
Like, that is honestly one of the worst.
Diallo
Like your WI fi could have been out. Like, there's so many reasons that have nothing to do.
Ben
Yes.
Diallo
That's a little bit of Julia's narcissism. But I also liked how realistic their resolution was because, you know, I think it's Gertie who says, you know, I know one sit down is not going to put me at ease of, you know, trusting you again. You know, I thought that was like, that was very mature to me.
Ben
It was very mature. I like that. So now we go to Villa Toscana. Not to be confused with Kachina Descana from Salt Lake City. Yeah, a favorite restaurant establishment. So it's this place. There's like swans, there's like boats. It's like very Lisa Vanderpump.
Diallo
I can totally see that.
Ben
Yes. Alexia shows up and she's in. It's like a tunic of some sort. It's. She's ready for narcissism.
Diallo
She's ready. And our Daniel's right there.
Ben
He's right there.
Diallo
Our guy is back.
Ben
He has. He has created an experience for these ladies.
Diallo
A self help experience.
Ben
Yes, because he. They have installed a whole bunch of mirrors around and they've written things on the mirrors that are. I don't remember what some of the mirrors actually even said because it was so quick, but things like, you know, look at yourself with that accent. Look at yourself. Look deeper. Look deeper. They want to kill you. The narcissists. They all should die. Like, she's like, I wrote that one. So she's like, you know, in the past, the girls have hired shamans and spiritual leaders and in anyone that could help us, you know, because we need a lot of help, you know, and we see like montage of all these different people that have tried to help him over the years. And she's like, but I'm bringing this guy in because he has more credibility.
Diallo
He's got those three books.
Ben
He has a working CANVA account and could do some really good memes.
Diallo
I really trust his Memes.
Ben
Yeah, they do cite that, like, because he has three books that therefore, like, he might be treated. Treated with some more gravitas for the narcissism stuff. So, I mean, I guess you could have, you know, maybe brought in a psychiatrist or a psychologist, but no. Baby steps.
Diallo
Daniel.
Ben
Daniel.
Diallo
You know, this is a one nightmare.
Ben
He's got a lot of wisdom. A lot of wisdom in his memes. So they're looking around, and there's all these quotes on the mirrors and everything. Oh, she goes, oh, look at this mirror. This is a good one. Okay, wait, wait, wait. Everyone's. Everyone gather. All the swans, gather around. Okay, here's what the Ms. Mirror says. You cannot fix someone who does not want to be fixed, but you could ruin your life trying to do it. That's true. It's true. Okay, let me call Todd. Let me tell him about that.
Diallo
That's that wisdom? That's that wisdom you're talking about dropping those.
Ben
Those. Dropping those pearls of wisdom. I like that. Alexa is doing this whole party, and we know she's. The very first thing she's gonna do is go back to Todd. Right.
Diallo
Sorry.
Ben
It's okay. You were caught up. You're emotional. Those memes really got you, didn't they?
Diallo
I get choked up.
Ben
It's a serious scene. So she's like. She says, all the girls think that this party is about Todd, but it's not about Todd. It's about all of us because we're all narcissists. And I say that as the star of the group. But anyway, I always think about that. By the way, last. Last year when she said that she was born a star. Remember when she said that?
Diallo
She's like, yeah.
Ben
She's like, I can do this right now because I was born a star. Like, I can say whatever I want because I've got star privilege.
Diallo
My favorite quote from Alexia of all time might be because I don't hear many other people, is slander, slander.
Ben
I'll never forget that.
Diallo
That was one of my favorites. I think that's the doctor, Nicole.
Ben
Yeah. So meanwhile, everyone's arriving at a sprinter van, and they're going to take the sprinter van over to this. This party. So Marisol gets there, and every time someone shows up, we get a joke.
Diallo
We get a hat on a hat, as we call it.
Ben
On a hat.
Diallo
We get a hat on it.
Ben
That's right. That's what it is. A hat on a hat.
Diallo
Yeah. They brought back my favorite word. Cockies.
Ben
Khakis. Yeah.
Diallo
So. So risque. I got to say, I mean, like, you know, I. I love. I love the character of Kiki, but I feel like her testimonials are all the same joke a hundred times a little.
Ben
It's getting a little bit like that.
Diallo
It's just. It's just I'm always like, I'm waiting for the sex joke, and it's just like, I feel like there's more there than that.
Ben
Yeah. But she's always been like, oh, penis. It's like everything. It's like, what do you think about her? What do you think about Gertie ringing the. The bell at the stock exchange? Oh, that's ringing a bell in front of a lot of penises.
Diallo
And by the way, this. When. When it's, you know, her time to show up, they give her the ultimate penis run. Yeah, it's just. It's just like. I was like, okay, one of my.
Ben
Favorite movies, by the way.
Diallo
Penis Run.
Ben
Chicken Run. Yeah.
Diallo
Oh, I thought it was a sequel to Midnight Run.
Ben
They were actually a trilogy. People don't realize the Run trilogy. There's the Run Run Bloodlines is coming out soon. That links them all together. But. Yeah. So what happens is that as they're arriving, they. They. They're all. They're given, like, a label. Goddess of something in, like, super basic font. I was really upset with that. It's like that. Zap. Chancery, perhaps, I think it was.
Diallo
Is that modern?
Ben
That's like that. It's like that font that people use for, like, to make, like, a fancy menu. Yeah. And you're like, put some more effort into it. Holiday Inn.
Diallo
There were all kinds of. It almost looked like it was like a YouTube thumbnail.
Ben
Yeah.
Diallo
You know, like, nobody wanted that.
Ben
I. I felt like it was a rush job. So Marisol is. Got it. Goddess of the khakis. It's back. I manifested it to come back and it's back.
Diallo
Made it happen. Or like, when she was talking about Alexia, she's like, you know, what do you think, Alexi D's?
Ben
When she said that, I knew. I could tell that she was gonna.
Diallo
Yeah. It's such a setup. We don't need to. The producers. We don't need that. Like, these ladies are funny on their own. We don't need these.
Ben
We don't need these silly graphics.
Diallo
And we don't have that fun.
Ben
We don't. We just. We don't.
Diallo
Definitely don't need the font.
Ben
Let's start with the font. The font is the most fixable thing. Okay. I know that there may be debate on the production team about whether or not they should have goofy, goofy chirons.
Diallo
But like, there is debate. Let us weigh in. Don't do any more.
Ben
Please don't do anymore. It didn't work on Vanderpump rule. Did not work on Potomac. Did not work on Atlanta. It is not working here. But luckily the show is like fine. Didn't shows great but like I just was. I don't feel like they need to do it commercials. Here comes one right now.
Diallo
We acting bad, bad, bad, bad.
Ben
We ain't trying to hurt nobody. For decades, he was untouchable. I've gone from Harlem to Hollywood, but now it's all coming undone. Sean Combs, the mogul as we know it is over. He will never be that person again even if he's found not guilty of these charges. I'm Jesse Weber, host of Law and Crime. The Rise and Fall of Diddy, the federal trial. A front row seat to the biggest trial in entertainment history. Sex trafficking, racketeering, prostitution, allegations by federal prosecutors that span decades. And witnesses who are finally speaking out. The spotlight is harsher, the stakes are higher. And for Diddy, there may be no second chances. You can listen to the rise and Fall of Diddy, the federal Trial exclusively with Wondery. Join Wondery in the Wondery app, Spotify or Apple podcasts. Right now, today is the worst day of Abby's life.
Diallo
The 17 year old cradles her newborn son in her arms.
Ben
They all saw how much I loved him. They didn't have to take him from me. Between 1945 and the early 1970s, they.
Diallo
Families ship their pregnant teenage daughters to.
Ben
Maternity homes and force them to secretly place their babies for adoption in hidden corners across America. It's still happening. My parents had me locked up in the godparent home against my will. They worked with them to manipulate me and to steal my son away from me. The godparent home is the brainchild of.
Diallo
Controversial preacher Jerry Falwell, the father of.
Ben
The modern evangelical right and the founder of Liberty University, where powerful men, emboldened.
Diallo
By their faith, determine who gets to.
Ben
Be a parent and who must give their child away. Follow Liberty Lost on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. So they all are just sort of like arriving and they're just like talking in the, in the, in the van and just like more. The other thing is, here's the other reason why I got upset about this. This, like, hat on a hat. This is an enormous cast. And I was like, oh, we're gonna have to sit through, like, nine of these, because each one was, like, 10 seconds. I was like, this is a lot. I say this as someone who's currently recording a podcast that's 90 minutes long. So meanwhile, Alexia and Daniel, they're still getting ready and stuff. And Alexia is the goddess of the stars, of course. So. So, long story short, they're all sitting there, and it's 12:30, and then we're seeing time tick by, and they're just sitting in the sprinter van on the side at a sidewalk for two hours.
Diallo
Which is just cruel. Absolutely. By the way, it's Miami, and they have the door open, so it's just. It's just humidity and sitting on a splinter van. And by the way, these women aren't dumb. They know when you get in a splinter van on a housewife show, somebody's gonna get into, like, one of the worst arguments.
Ben
But, like, it's just. They're just sitting there. I mean, I don't know why they haven't left. I don't know. And they actually.
Diallo
In the real world, they would have left.
Ben
Yeah. They also seem, like, relatively calm. They're just sort of, like, chatting.
Diallo
Yeah.
Ben
They're just like. Well, Marcus says, blah, blah, you know, and. But, you know, they're mad, but they're just, like, chatting at the same time. And then finally, Lisa comes on. She comes on board.
Diallo
It's important. And she makes an entrance, which is.
Ben
As she makes an entrance.
Diallo
She made a really big entrance.
Ben
Who do you think you are? Somebody just rang the bell at the stock exchange. By the way, I did that, everyone. In case anyone wants to acknowledge it.
Diallo
By the way, I did that. I know none of you know that because none of you were there.
Ben
So she gets on board and like, oh, wow. And. And so, Marisol, like, monkey, where are you? Monkey. Monkey. So Stephanie just goes in. Stephanie's like, I am ready. I'm used to talking. I'm used to talking to 80 men.
Diallo
I will say, you know, this is not her first episode, but this is her entrance into the season. Boy, she held nothing back. She came really hard.
Ben
And I thought it was great, because Lisa has pulled these hijinks many times before, and they will sometimes say something to her, but this girl, she doesn't listen to them, does not listen. And. And. And so Stephanie's like, I just want to say that if I ever fly anybody anywhere and Lisa shows up even four minutes late, she's gonna see the plane take off without her, which is like, you know, Lisa just professed that she wants to Be friends with her because of the pj.
Diallo
And by the way, I don't know who's writing on the mirrors, but this one just seemed a little too perfect. Nobody gets angrier than a narcissist accused of something that he did. Like that cutaway. I was like, okay, so the producers are writing this in the lipsticks?
Ben
Yeah, I think so.
Diallo
I don't even know if that was a Daniel original. But then again, nothing's a Daniel original. He's a collector of memes.
Ben
Yeah, I, I thought that one mirror that said nothing bothers a narcissist more than having to build a house for Lisa Hawkinstein was like. I was like, wow, that's a scary wow. That's a specific meme.
Diallo
Very limited in the number of people who could benefit from that.
Ben
But I mean, sure, I support it.
Diallo
She's like, whether it said lipstick, be sure to arrive two hours late. Also very specific.
Ben
Yeah, Yeah. I was very impressed with his work at that moment. So anyway, so I'm sorry. So she arrives two hours late and I, I misspoke. Stephanie's whole thing was only at the one hour mark is when she said the thing about the airplane, which is also her way of saying I'm. I have the capability to fly. Everyone on this cast somewhere just want to say. I just, just want to point that out.
Diallo
It's all, it's always to telegraph some other information.
Ben
Always. So, so then like did her other.
Diallo
Sister have like a, a Mormon sized family and like her other sisters like, you know, quiet like book librarian or something like that? Why give a Range Rover?
Ben
Exactly.
Diallo
Cooper. I don't get.
Ben
I think that like one, one twin has a family and one twin is like alone in life. And therefore like I guess Stephanie, let's.
Diallo
Leave a smaller carbon footprint. And the other one doesn't give a. About the earth.
Ben
Actually, I'm going to say that this, I think that Stephanie plays games. I think she gave the Mini Cooper to the woman who has the big family and she gave, gave the, the solo a big be. Like, so you can remember like one. Remember when you used to have room in your car and the other one's like, just know you'll never be able to fill this.
Diallo
How big and pimpy it is.
Ben
Look at all those unsat on seats. Low me.
Diallo
It came with, it came with the baby seat. Okay.
Ben
Yeah. Just as a baby could be yours. That's.
Diallo
I like, I think Stephanie has planned all this stuff out.
Ben
She's 40.
Diallo
Chess.
Ben
So they have like a lot of. There's like a lot of chatter. Okay. And it goes on for a while. Okay, so finally Lisa comes in. She's like, hello. Hi, goddesses. You guys look gorgeous. You're gorgeous, goddesses. How's everybody do if you walk in two hours late and don't enter with the, the customer. I'm so sorry. Sorry. Oh my God. There was a, like, like you have to pull out the traffic thing. You have to say, you gotta call. Like, we're like, use the Lenny card. Lenny called. It was awful. He burned down the house.
Diallo
Lady was supposed to come get the kids. He didn't show up. He's just, he's rebuilding the, the mausoleum that we used to live in.
Ben
His mother's making him pierogies. So she just comes in, not even apologetic, just like, hi. Hi, everyone. How's everyone doing? And so Julia's like waiting for you got this. And this is where Stephanie goes and she's like, lisa, do you think your time is more important than all of ours or do you think that you're more valuable? Are we supposed to celebrate your entrance? Do you think how rude it is to make everybody wait?
Diallo
And I was like, oh, I mean, four questions. Like four questions in any. Even to people you love, four questions is always too much.
Ben
This is, is, this is the show my group working at all. On all cylinders right here.
Diallo
Like how you talked to 80 men. You throw them four questions.
Ben
Yeah, exactly. I mean there, I mean, we're joking, but there probably is something to like when you're dealing with like construction professionals, like sometimes you really do have to like, I'm very, very non confrontational. I hate it. And so like, I think you, you do have to sort of like enter.
Diallo
She's gotta, you know, she's gotta go out there and, you know.
Ben
Yeah, do the jabs. She's got a boss, baby. So you think your time's more important, which is great because these are the things that we've been asking and you always ask, but no one ever says to the person, because there's that.
Diallo
I was, I was, I was loving it.
Ben
I was cheering because there is that up thing where like someone does something that's like egregiously rude. And then when you call them on it, somehow that's actually more offensive because it's like being. Making them uncomfortable to their face. It's.
Diallo
It's almost like when someone says something racist, you say that they're racist and they're like, how dare you?
Ben
Yeah, how could you say that?
Diallo
This could ruin my reputation calling someone racist. Is far worse than being actually racist.
Ben
Oh, yeah. Isn't it fun? So. So then she's like, yeah, she's like, you know, so Lisa then goes to the ultimate deflection, which has nothing to do with anything, where she goes, I don't even know you that well for you, this baby speaking to me that way. And Stephanie's like, well, I know enough about you that you just made us wait two hours to wait on you. Like. Like some big, grand Lisa entrance.
Diallo
That's very rude.
Ben
And I don't think her knowing you or not makes any difference. All she knows is that she's stuck in a sprinter van with Marisol making cocky jokes for two hours.
Diallo
Ninth level of hell, man. Dante's Inferno.
Ben
Marisol, where is your. Where's your manifestation powers? At least into this.
Diallo
I know exactly.
Ben
So she's. She's saying all this stuff, and Lisa's been like, okay, you're being very rude right now. You're being very rude. Okay, you don't even know me. You don't even know me me. And in my mind, I'm thinking, but you also don't know her. And, like, you don't seem to care. Like.
Diallo
Like, it don't go both ways, Right?
Ben
But also, it's like, if you don't know her, like, don't you. Aren't you. Like, when you meet someone, you try to put your best foot forward.
Diallo
Yeah, but you know what? I think the. The. This is almost like one of those meta things. Like, Lisa's definitely hit her on the. Hey, you're the new housewife. You can't talk to me.
Ben
That's what she's trying the OG Here.
Diallo
And it's. It's. It's not. It's not working.
Ben
Don't talk to me that way again. And just don't. Don't be two hours late and make us wait. Like, don't talk to me like that. Excuse me. I don't even know you, and you're talking to me like that. Don't be late. I don't know what. I don't know what. I don't know you, but I heard that. That you don't have a lot of friends.
Diallo
Lisa's just flailing. I mean, like, she doesn't have a leg to stand on logically. So now she's going to, like, this is like middle school. So I heard you don't have a lot of friends.
Ben
I don't know you, but I heard you don't have a lot of friends.
Diallo
I was checking if I'm Lisa, I fired the opposite research team that I hired because that's not strong dirt.
Ben
Not.
Diallo
That's not strong dirt.
Ben
Yeah, that's like she should have used some chat GPT right now. And then, and then, and then Stephanie has like a weird thing which is. Well, that's because a lot of them are like you disrespectful and they're two hours late. I've got, I got a lot of two hour late friends. That's why I don't have a lot of friends because a lot of them tend to be like you.
Diallo
Yeah, that did that. Lot of did that. So you, so you're saying your friends are disrespectful?
Ben
Well, I guess she wasn't denying that she doesn't have friends, but she was like, yeah, I, I, whenever I have friends, it turns out they're the two hour late kind.
Diallo
Variety.
Ben
And so, and the entire time Stephanie is kind of like doing this thing where she's. If she could put her hand in Lisa's face, she would, but her arms aren't long enough so she just sort of like paws at like the, the air right in her.
Diallo
That's such a good point. I feel like Lisa is, I, I feel like Stephanie's arms are always at her side. Like they're always, she's like a very sort of like, she doesn't make like big. She doesn't gesticulate wi. Wildly.
Ben
Yeah. But here she was sort of doing a little T Rex arm thing.
Diallo
She's like this. Yeah.
Ben
She's like, she's in like little mini wax on, wax off and oh no.
Diallo
Put your face down here and talk to like it's, it's very small.
Ben
So then, then he's like, don't ever put your hand in front of my face or you know, or tell me what I need to discuss with my friends. She's like, well, I wasn't putting your hand. My hand in your face because my hand doesn't even go that far.
Diallo
Exactly. I don't know if you noticed, but my hand is way down here.
Ben
I am, I'm built in. I, I can't even have an assault moment if I wanted to because it is built in that I can only reach this far. I have a small radius. Literally. Is radius in the arm or is that the leg?
Diallo
Oh gosh.
Ben
Radius ulna. I just, I don't know. I know that these are bones, but I don't know which one is which.
Diallo
You know, I'm sure the Internet, I think it's shoulder isn't it? Radio.
Ben
This is one of those terrible moments where you. You enter a piece of evidence into the case on a podcast, and you don't have the answer. And then people at home listen and they get, okay, wait, what bone? What bone is the radius I'm looking up right now real quickly. Ooh, it's one of two bones in the forearm. So, yes, I would like to announce. It was an effective pun.
Diallo
It totally works. It totally works.
Ben
He doesn't have the radius.
Diallo
So I'm impressed.
Ben
Lisa's getting mad. It's not funny. This isn't funny. She's like, well, I'm not trying to be funny. Your friends all think you're rude. Lisa. She's like, well, I think you're rude. Soul's like, well, Stephanie said that while we all want to save her, I mean, how long have I known her? 13 years now. And Monkey is always late. Do we want to roll some clips of that from. From, like, 2013? No. Okay. All right. So, Lisa, don't ever talk to me again like that. This is. I don't even know this girl. Like, she's new to the group. Don't talk to me like that. You don't need to be that mouthpiece. You don't need to be a mouthpiece for everyone. These are my. These are my friends. She's definitely trying to pull the, like, yeah, Heather Gay to Bronwyn, in a sense.
Diallo
Yeah, absolutely.
Ben
You know, yeah. But she doesn't have the authority of Heather gay. I don't think that Lisa. I. You always get the sense that they all just barely tolerate Lisa.
Diallo
Yeah, there's. There's very. There's very little. Gosh, such a mean thing. There's very little that we've been seeing from her that you can just hold on to and be like, oh, that's awesome. You know, it just sucks. I hate to say that about another human being, but, like, she's not giving us a whole lot.
Ben
Yeah. I mean, I'm glad that she's on the show because, yes, she's so self involved. It's like, that's important to me. But. But, like, as a person, I don't know if she's that great. I mean, she's great.
Diallo
I'm trying themselves all these shows. We are the. The Greek chorus that will judge them. So.
Ben
Yeah, I'm sure. I'm sure if we hung out with her, she'd be awesome in real life.
Diallo
Sure.
Ben
That's been my experience with, like, really every housewife I've encountered that they're super cool to hang. I don't know why I always go down this path. I always get, like, paranoid that they're listening and that their feelings are hurt. And I. Yeah, There's a part of me that doesn't want to hurt people's feelings.
Diallo
There's a part of me that doesn't want to say that everybody doesn't have, like, some intrinsic, you know, value and some wonderfulness. But I will say that whoever's editing the show doesn't give you a whole lot on Lisa to grab onto and be like, oh, that's cool.
Ben
Yeah, I don't, I don't want to hurt Lisa's feelings, but she sucks. So. So Lisa's like, you know, she's complaining and Lars is like, but we've been.
Diallo
Here since 12 o' clock the second Larsa speaks. You know, this is, this is. We're here now.
Ben
Yeah, you're just waiting.
Diallo
You were waiting for Larsa to say anything to Lisa.
Ben
Well, and also, like, you know, Stephanie's doing her job, which is. She's, she, she's, she's proving like, she's being a loyal, like, attack dog for, for Larsa and Lars. Like, you've done well now I will chime in and back you up as per our agreement. And he's like, larsa, we're not even talking right now. We're not talking. We're not talking right now.
Diallo
We are not talking right now. We are not talking.
Ben
You were talking about Jody. You talked about Jody and his eyes. No, we're not talking, by the way. Stupid person. How do you even start off talking to somebody like this? Stop, Stop. You don't even start off talking about something like. And then stop. Stephanie said, which I was so happy. She goes, well, how do you start off talking? How do you start off being two hours late with somebody you don't know? And I was, I literally went, yes. Because I was like. That was the point I was making in my mind.
Diallo
Great.
Ben
I love that. How do you. How do you start off two hours late with someone you don't know?
Diallo
It's not a great first impression.
Ben
You. That's correct.
Diallo
And then the producer sort of doubles down on that because they're like, how long would Lisa last as one of your employees?
Ben
Lisa wouldn't even make it past the end. Past the interview because she would probably be late to the interview and I wouldn't see her and nobody would see her, and I am livid. I probably would become friends with her, though, because I am friends with late people. Apparently.
Diallo
The more. The more disrespectful, the better.
Ben
She goes, well, perhaps it came off really rude, but it's because I might. You know, my very, very number one only pet peeve is that I don't like tardiness, and I just felt like it was very disrespectful. Don't lecture me. She said, well, my other pet peeve is I don't like when people don't accept my lectures. So we're really off to a bad start here.
Diallo
I will say, like, you know, this whole exchange is fantastic.
Ben
Yeah.
Diallo
You know, like, you just immediately see, like, oh, Stephanie's got. She's got fight.
Ben
She doesn't care.
Diallo
Yeah.
Ben
She's like, I, I. I like that she's coming in, she's doing what she needs to do, but it doesn't. It did not actually feel that thirsty to me. I felt like it was earned.
Diallo
It was. He had all the moral high ground, and she used every inch of it.
Ben
Every inch of that Merlin ground. So then she's basically. Then she's like, she pulls back and she's like, look, I'm apologizing, and I'm apologizing. Why? I'm explaining why I came in hot. Well, it's backhand. It's not even a real apology. It's like, well, do you want. Do you want an apology or do you not want an apology? Either take what I give you or you don't take it.
Diallo
Like, wow, I love that she offered her an out. I know.
Ben
And I, like, She's like, you want it or no? I will keep fighting with you. I have no problem. So, yeah, Lisa's like, who is. Who the hell is this girl barking at me? Who is she? I don't know you. You can't talk to me like that. Sit down, boss baby.
Diallo
Okay, so right at the very end of the confrontation, Lisa gets in a solid dig that's made me laugh out loud. And I. I love your minions thing. I didn't know that was coming. But when they cut to her, when they cut to the shadow Stephanie, I was like, oh, damn, she's the boss baby.
Ben
Yeah. I've never seen boss baby, but, like.
Diallo
See it so many times with my kids.
Ben
The thing is, there's a whole genre of boss babies. To me. My. My number one boss baby is the baby from Roger Rabbit, you know, So I just like, that's just a whole genre of those little bossy babies cartoon form. And I think it's like, 100% Roger.
Diallo
Rabbit holes the up. It's such a good movie. It's such a good movie. I actually, you know, I have a deal over at Disney. I asked him, like, is there any way we could reboot this?
Ben
I was about to say, why is there no Roger Rabbit?
Diallo
It's because there's so many. There's so many, you know, copywritten characters that show up in that thing. So you never have a Bugs Bunny next to a Mickey Mouse again.
Ben
But also, why can't they come together? Can't these corporate.
Diallo
It was kind of amazing that. That one scene, like, with like Woody Woodpecker and like all these old cartoons together, that was amazing. But even just Roger Rabbit, there's like all kinds of like, rights holders to just him. That makes it kind of impossible for us to revisit Toontown, which I thought was like. Like a. A really fun world to play in.
Ben
It is weird that we really didn't get another Roger Rabbit, like, entity or IP ever since then. That was like a one off. We didn't even get the thing.
Diallo
Correct me if I'm wrong, it was a huge hit.
Ben
Huge hit.
Diallo
I think that's a function of the times. You know, in the 80s and 90s, sometimes a movie just hit and that was all you got, you know, like, you know, they didn't make a sequel to every hit movie. Yeah, nowadays, like, they'd already have like, you know, eight TV shows and everything following up on it.
Ben
You know what? Know what's funny? I remember seeing Roger Rabbit. My family was on vacation in Vermont, very bougie. And we went and we went to the movies and we saw Roger Rabbit and I loved it. And the next night we went to the same movie theater. And you know what we saw the very next night?
Diallo
What was that?
Ben
Midnight Run.
Diallo
It all one of the best movies of all time.
Ben
All full circle.
Diallo
I gotta watch that whole trilogy.
Ben
It's a great trilogy diallo. Thank you so much. The. The episode ends on a. To be continued. Like, will they ever get to the narcissism party? I'm not sure. I was looking forward to it on the episode. It didn't really happen.
Diallo
But they didn't get this tur. But we do see in the next on. We do see that Lisa gets. Gets the, you know, the goddess of being the victim the most or something like that. And she storms off in tears. And that was when I literally thought to myself, you know what? She might need at least one ally, because she's literally spent almost the entire season storming out of the stuff in tears.
Ben
Yeah, but you know what it's like. You know, that's just Lisa's lot in life. That's just Lisa's lot. That's her lot in life. And I say that knowing that she does.
Diallo
Sounds like an 80s sitcom. Lisa's lot in life.
Ben
Yeah. She literally does not even have a single lot in life. Like, she's waiting for Lenny to finish building it, but either way.
Diallo
I like when she's like, this place is so quaint and it's comfy. Right. First off, it's 6,000 square feet. But what he doesn't mention is that there's not one soft surface in that entire place. It's all white, hard edges and, like, marble and concrete.
Ben
It's like a house built for cocaine.
Diallo
It looks like a house for, like, a single dude. Not like the place where you can welcome in kids and, like, get comfy and watch tv.
Ben
It's not only a house built for cocaine. It looks like it was made of, like, petrified cocaine.
Diallo
The shit that gets stepped on, they just, like, molded in and they just, like.
Ben
They, like, wax it.
Diallo
They give you a kitchen island and a coffee table.
Ben
Yeah. Dialo, thank you so much.
Diallo
Thank you so much for having me. I'm such a fan.
Ben
Oh, well, I'm a fan of yours and of you in general. I, you know, I love hanging out with you and talking with you, and you'll have to come back and also tell the people where they can find you because they. Everyone should be following Dialo.
Diallo
I think the easiest place to find me is on Instagram at Diallo. Just six letters, dia, L, O, D. There you can follow, you know, what I'm doing on the podcast or what I'm doing in TV and film, and also what, you know, me and the family are up to. So.
Ben
Yeah. And everyone, not only should you listen to podcasts, but you should go back and watch the episodes of Southside and Sherman Showcase.
Diallo
They're really fun. They're very fun shows. 100 Rotten Tomatoes, we're proud of that.
Ben
There we go.
Diallo
And, you know, I don't think either show ever lost a fan.
Ben
Well, hopefully Southside gets a second life somewhere someday.
Diallo
You know, here's the funny thing. Just to talk. Quick shop, we recently sold a pitch, and it is very similar to Southside without being another season of Southside. A lot of the same brain trust, some new brains involved, and we're really, really excited about that. Don't want to jinx it by naming it, but I think stay tuned.
Ben
Okay, well, great. Looking forward to when you do some stunt casting with Lisa Hochstein.
Diallo
Hey, can I. Can I plug something real quick?
Ben
100.
Diallo
Pick up this book ages for Housewives. This is by a good, good friend, Lindsay Rosenberg.
Ben
Okay.
Diallo
When I'm not listening to your podcast, I have a thread with Lindsay and my wife and our friend Paul and all in this. We just go to town on all this Bravo stuff. It's so much fun.
Ben
Yeah. H is for Housewives. Lindsay illustrated this and did the whole thing and she's great. And we love Lindsay and we love your wife and we love Paul too, by the way, thank you for being here and thank you everyone for. For being here as well. And we will catch you on the next episode of Watch what happens. Bye, everyone.
Diallo
Take care.
Ben
Watch what crap. INS would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King. It's always a party on Allison Block. Our way is the Amber way. It's the Foster and the Furious. It's Amanda Foster, she can run my country. It's Angie McGovern it's always automatic with Ashley Auto. Put your hands together for Carly Clapp.
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Will Lauren Sills be bringing the funk? It's Leslie Plunkett, she gets a name.
Diallo
From us It's Lindsey D. Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Leno. Fresh as a daisy. It's Maisie McHenry we love her on the rocks. It's Melissa Cox, Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the burger.
Ben
This is living with Michelle Vivian I.
Diallo
Love a ya Olivia Williamson tastier than Flanderson.
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Diallo
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Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman. Let's share with Sharon Eldridge. Darn Skippy, it's Tippy the bay area and our super premium sponsors She's VVIP It's Amanda V Can't lose when you're with Amy Baldwin somebody get us 10cc's of Betsy MD we're taking the gold with Brenda Silva let's get real with.
Diallo
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Ben
It'S queen Laifa Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall Hail the cork master the master of the cork Jennifer Corcoran we got our wish It's Jen Plish she's not harsh She's Jill Hirsch Knock, knock, knocking on Katie Manock's door My Favorite Murdo Karen McMurdo we love him madly It's Kyle Pod Shadley in the study with a candlestick It's Leslie Peacock we're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Baron She's a whiz It's Liz Sarthi always killing it It's Lola Al Kalani.
Diallo
The incredible edible Matthew sisters She eases our woes it's Melissa St. Rose there's a chance of meatballs It's Rebecca Cloud.
Ben
She'S the queen bee It's Sarah Lemke we cannot tell a lie It's Sarah Tell of son Shannon out of a cannon Anthony, please don't stop it's solely and pop let's take off with Tamla.
Diallo
Playing It's always a good time when you're wasting time with Bravo she ain't.
Ben
No shrinking violet Coutar we love you guys.
Diallo
If you like, watch what crappens.
Ben
You can listen ad free right now by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery.
Diallo
App or on Apple podcasts.
Ben
Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music.
Diallo
Before you go, tell us about yourself.
Ben
By filling out a short survey@wondry.com survey.
Diallo
Ben hadn't had a decent night's sleep in a month.
Ben
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Diallo
When he arrived at his beachside hotel.
Ben
He discovered a miraculous bed slung between two trees and fell into the best.
Diallo
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Watch What Crappens Podcast Summary
Episode: #2918 RHOM S7E5 Part 2: Too Late to Apologize w/ Diallo Riddle
Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam
Release Date: July 11, 2025
Platform: Wondery
In episode #2918 of "Watch What Crappens," hosts Ben Mandelker and Ronnie Karam delve into the intricacies of "The Real Housewives of Miami" (RHOM) Season 7, Episode 5 titled Too Late to Apologize. Joined by special guest Diallo Riddle, the trio offers a comprehensive and entertaining analysis of the episode's pivotal moments, character dynamics, and overarching narratives. The discussion is enriched with personal anecdotes, sharp critiques, and insightful observations, making it engaging for both avid fans and newcomers to the franchise.
The episode begins with Ben and Diallo reminiscing about miniature golf, setting the stage for their discussion on a significant scene at an indoor miniature golf course called Puttery. Here, Kiki, her son Shamar, and his friend Neary navigate the second indoor miniature golf course, highlighting both the fun and the frustrations of the activity.
Ben (02:01): "I don't feel like there's any good miniature golf courses in Los Angeles."
Diallo (03:54): "False advertising."
The hosts express their disdain for standardized putt-putt courses lacking genuine interaction and whimsical elements. Ben emphasizes his preference for interactive and creative miniature golf experiences, lamenting the mundane setups that fail to engage players meaningfully.
Massoud's introduction marks his first significant appearance alongside his wife, Stephanie. The hosts dissect their dynamic, noting Stephanie's assertive "boss baby" persona juxtaposed with Massoud's more subdued demeanor.
Stephanie's overzealous efforts to showcase Massoud's youthful side, including humorous incidents like Massoud attempting TikTok dances, are critiqued for being forced and out of sync with the show's authentic vibe.
A central focus of the episode is the heated confrontation between Gertie and Julia at a restaurant. Ben and Diallo analyze the emotional depth and scripted tensions, questioning the authenticity and motivations behind the characters' actions.
Julia's portrayal as a "nasty villain" is examined, with the hosts debating whether her antagonistic behavior feels genuine or forced for dramatic effect.
The discussion extends to the communication barriers between the characters, highlighting moments where language misunderstandings amplify tensions.
Ben and Diallo critique various production elements, such as scene setups, character introductions, and visual aesthetics like mirror quotes designed to reflect narcissistic traits.
The hosts express frustration with superficial production choices that undermine the show's authenticity, advocating for more meaningful character development and storylines.
Lisa's arrival at the "narcissism party" is dissected, with the hosts highlighting her disruptive entry and the ensuing conflict with Stephanie.
Stephanie's confrontation with Lisa is portrayed as a pivotal moment, showcasing Stephanie's loyalty to Larsa and her willingness to challenge disruptive behavior within the group.
The interaction underscores the fragile dynamics within the Housewives ensemble, where alliances and antagonisms shape the narrative landscape.
As the episode wraps up, Ben and Diallo reflect on the unresolved tensions and anticipate future developments in the season. They emphasize the need for authentic conflict resolutions and deeper character explorations to maintain viewer engagement.
The hosts express optimism for the show's progression, hoping for more nuanced storylines and character arcs that move beyond superficial drama.
Ben (03:33): "How do you start off two hours late with someone you don't know?"
Diallo (22:09): "It's about nuance and feelings, but none of them are speaking their native language."
Ben (24:36): "These people are trying to convey all these complex emotions. They don't have the same rules, they don't have the same language."
Diallo (35:46): "He's got those three books that therefore, like, he might be treated with some more gravitas for the narcissism stuff."
Ben (47:46): "How do you start off two hours late with someone you don't know?"
Episode #2918 of "Watch What Crappens" offers a thorough and entertaining recap of RHOM Season 7, Episode 5. Through dynamic discussions and candid critiques, Ben Mandelker and Ronnie Karam, alongside guest Diallo Riddle, provide valuable insights into the show's narrative and character developments. Their balanced approach, blending humor with thoughtful analysis, makes this summary a must-listen for fans seeking a deeper understanding of their favorite Housewives and the production nuances that shape their stories.
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