#2974 Below Deck S12E12 Part 1: Docked Over

Summary

Watch What Crappens – Episode #2974 Summary

Below Deck S12E12 Part 1: Docked Over
Release Date: August 19, 2025
Hosts: Ben Mandelker & Ronnie Karam

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Episode Overview

Ben and Ronnie dive into Below Deck S12E12, where technical difficulties leave the yacht and the guests stuck on dock for most of the charter. The hosts delight in mocking the crew’s scramble for creative alternatives and the growing guest frustrations, all while reveling in the continued love-triangle drama and unfolding intra-crew gripes. As always, their signature humor and sharp Bravo observations fuel a recap that's as much about snark as it is about scene-by-scene recaps.

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Main Discussion Points & Insights

1. Docked and Disgruntled: Charter Goes Nowhere

• Situation: The yacht can’t leave the dock due to mechanical failures; the crew and guests are stuck in port.
• Ronnie is thrilled the episode avoids “bridge shenanigans” (05:21):

  “I was happy they were stuck on the dock—no watching them go through that f***ing bridge they need to demolish in St. Martin!”

• Ben argues being docked isn’t the same as the "fun" of traveling to new places; sympathizes with the guests but not with the ones threatening crew tips (06:31).
• Both hosts agree the crew’s hospitality still ought to be appreciated, but critique the lack of imaginative solutions for guest entertainment.

  “Why didn’t they get a van and take them to the other side of the island?” – Ronnie (07:09)

2. Tip Drama & Crew Critiques

• Debate unfolds over whether guests are justified to withhold tips due to ruined plans.
• Ben:

  “If the boat’s broken, refuse to pay for the charter! But don’t take it out on the crew.” (06:31)

• Ronnie:

  “The service was still service—even if they didn’t get the jet skis out.”

3. Love Triangle Fatigue

• The Jess-Barbara-Solene triangle is panned as dull and played out.
• Ronnie:

  “One of the dullest things we’ve seen in quite some time, this trio…this trio of pussy.” (09:42)

• Ben:

  “Lesbianism just goes so quick, you know? We’re robbed of a whole two years of runaround…” (10:07)

• Both bemoan how quickly this shipboard affair has turned into “boring act three” energy, skipping any real fun or drama.

4. Hugo Under the Microscope

• Ben and Ronnie both sour on Hugo this episode.
• Ben:

  “I’m not liking Hugo…he’s giving a lot of, ‘You should smile more’ energy…” (11:49)

• Ronnie notes this is the first time Hugo’s real personality pokes through the earlier “love triangle” distraction.

5. Kyle’s Fallout and Damo’s “Betrayal”

• Kyle is still stewing over being disciplined for his guest-hookup.
• Kyle tries to act responsibly but comes off insincere (15:28):

  Ronnie: “He’s pretending to take responsibility… We know you don’t believe it.”

• Damo’s role as the “bestie” who broke Kyle’s confidence is called out.
• Ben:

  “Damo did betray him, but I wish it’d been someone else—it’s hard to stick up for someone so in the wrong.” (17:48)

• The hosts point out Kyle gossiped to “half the boat”—this was never confidential.

6. Chef Anthony’s Culinary Woes (And Octopus Showdown)

• Chef’s PTSD from last season’s dietary restrictions resurfaces.
• Hilarious send-ups of his “badass chef” persona:

  Ben (as chef): “If the octopus gives me one piece of attitude, I will slam it face, because I demand respect.” (18:27)

• Ronnie:

  “He throws rags at restrictions now and it’s solved.” (18:57)

7. Endless Boat Puns, Absurd Tangents, and Wry Observations

• Extended bits include creating female Bible character names (“Lazarette,” “Jesusette,” “Mariette”—13:31).
• Much mileage from “fly bridge” puns and deck job innuendo (29:07, 29:33).
• The “ugly crew” vs. “TV crew” bit when off-camera boat workers appear (36:10–37:52), comparing them to Monty Mole from Mario.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

On Deck Drama & Guest Complaints

• Ronnie:

  “Why do we have to watch these boats scrape themselves up every week?” (05:21)

• Ben:

  “I’d be pissed. It’s not like you’re out in the middle of the ocean…they go from fun place to fun place.” (06:31)

On the Crew’s Lack of Creativity

• Ronnie:

  “Why didn’t they offer to drive them to the Dutch side of the island? I don’t understand.” (07:09)

On the Love Triangle

• Ben:

  “They’re like act three, but don’t have an act two.” (10:51)

• Ronnie:

  “I just want to see them stop doing messy things then complaining about the consequences.” (22:22)

On Hugo

• Ben:

  “Hugo is pretty boring… What do you need, Hugo? What do you need?” (11:49)

On Kyle’s Sob Story

• Ben:

  “He hasn’t been as crazy, fall-down-drunk and as messy as last season, but he’s still crashing and burning…” (63:31)

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Key Episode Segments & Timestamps

• [05:06] – Episode begins in earnest: Ben & Ronnie recount their broadcast schedule and welcome listeners.
• [05:08 – 08:45] – Dock woes: Hosts relish the rare non-sailing episode, mock the bridge drama, and question the guest expectations.
• [09:42 – 11:49] – Love triangle gripes: Lesbian drama running out of steam; Hugo’s true nature emerges.
• [12:23 – 18:27] – Kyle/Damo friction: Betrayal, fake accountability, and gossipy crew fallout.
• [18:27 – 19:32] – Chef Anthony flashbacks & food restrictions: “Badass chef” persona mocked.
• [29:07 – 33:41] – Boat terminology and crew jokes: “Fly bridge,” “ugly crew" bit, deck dry/wet puns.
• [34:00 – 36:01] – Kyle’s self-sabotage: The hosts riff on intentional spiral-without-payoff.
• [53:00 – 54:42] – Mechanical breakdown, guest frustration: Raffle for capri pants, Sudoku for entertainment.
• [61:42 – 63:31] – Kyle’s Instagram wall/backstory: Emotional beat, met with concern and eye-rolls.

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The Hosts’ Tone & Meta-Humor

• The episode is packed with their signature, affectionate-yet-eviscerating roast of both the real Below Deck events and Bravo editing itself.
• Dialogue is snappy, mocking, and full of callbacks—both to previous seasons and to memes, movies, and meta-Bravo culture.
• Ronnie and Ben break into impressions and hypothetical reality taglines; faux biblical names, toyed-with TV tropes, and relentless food/boat puns carry the episode.
• Memorable running jokes about “the ugly people” locked below deck, boat staff vs. on-camera crew, and the repetitive nature of Bravo relationship drama.

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Takeaways & Unresolved Tensions

• The episode sets up even more dire boredom and guest unrest for part two, as the crew’s lack of experience with this kind of disruption becomes clear.
• The hosts suggest the season risks stalling unless the production (and crew) find more inventive ways to entertain themselves and the guests.
• Ronnie and Ben’s exhaustion with the storyline is channeled into escalating, hilarious absurdist tangents and Bravo meta-commentary—a delight for fans who enjoy their signature snark.

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Summary Table: Major Segments

| Timestamp | Segment Description | |--------------|----------------------------------------------------------| | 05:08–08:45 | Dock drama, lack of planning for stuck guests | | 09:42–11:49 | Love triangle fatigue, Hugo critique | | 12:23–18:27 | Kyle’s trouble, Damo’s betrayal, chef’s food stories | | 29:07–37:52 | Boat lingo puns, “ugly crew” production jokes | | 53:00–54:42 | Capri pants raffle, Sudoku as entertainment | | 61:42–63:31 | Kyle’s backstory/Instagram montage, hosts' dry concern |

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For Listeners Who Haven’t Tuned In

This episode exemplifies "Watch What Crappens" at its most irreverent: dissecting a slow episode of Below Deck by focusing more on Bravo clichés, production quirks, and comically overanalyzing crew behavior than on plot advancement. Ben and Ronnie’s banter turns a “nothing happened” episode into a Bravo-fueled roast—complete with sharp takes on entitlement, hospitality, and reality TV editing shenanigans.

You’ll get plenty of inside jokes, tangents on pop culture, and that special brand of affectionate evisceration that only true Bravo superfans can deliver.

Transcript

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[Ben]

Well, hello everybody and welcome to Watch what Crappens. I'm Ronnie and that's Ben over there. Hello, Bennunni. How you doing, babes?

[Ronnie]

I am just fantastic. Ronnie, how are you?

[Ben]

Good. I'm just enjoying this lovely Tuesday here. To recap. Below deck, it's a lovely day to tuck Deck that suck. The deck. Let's talk about Deck, baby. Let's talk about. Yeah, man. Let's talk about Deck and me.

[Ronnie]

All the good things that. All the good things that.

[Ben]

And the bad things.

[Ronnie]

Things that could be. Let's talk about that.

[Ben]

Welcome to the show, everybody. Thanks for everybody who joined us at Amazon Live yesterday. It's every other Monday at 4pm on Amazon. That's where. That's where it's at. And the Mondays, we're not doing that like this coming Monday. Next Monday, we'll be doing crappy hour at 5:30pm Pacific Time over on YouTube. You can also usually catch that on Instagram Patreon. It's a free Patreon post if you just want to look there. Also, we have videos every day on Patreon of these recaps. So if you'd rather watch these crappings on demand on Patreon, that's also where you get our bonus episodes. So thanks for everybody who supports us over there. If you don't want to do Patreon or it's not in your budge, we get it. You can get videos a week later over at our YouTube channel. Okay? So go to that. Watch them up there. We don't care. We're not tracking you, okay? We're just appreciative that you're here, part of this beautiful family. Okay?

[Ronnie]

That's so eloquent.

[Ben]

So, guys, guess what? Today we're stuck on dock.

[Ronnie]

Stuck on doc for misadventure.

[Ben]

All I want is to give people adventure today.

[Ronnie]

Honestly, Honestly, I was happy that they were stuck on the dock to have an episode where we didn't have to watch them go through that fucking bridge on St. Martin and that they need to demolish and rebuild. So that way it's easier for cruise ships to go through. I mean, why do we have to be subjected to that misery every single week on this show? Watching these boats nearly scrape themselves up going through a tiny, tiny bridge that was never even. Seems to be meant for yachts. It was like, meant for canoes. Why do they do that? I can't stand it. So for the fact that they were stuck in where they were and didn't have to do any of these bridge shenanigans, except that one moment, go under the bridge, which I supported. I was very happy about that. Also, I'm not going to lie. If I were on a yacht and I didn't and we couldn't go out to see, I think I would still be, like, really okay with it. Because you're on a yacht. I mean, it's still awesome. You're being waited on hand and toe. Is there any difference between being on a yacht and being able to see, I don't know, a beautiful Caribbean country outside your window versus, like, seeing ocean? I don't think so. You're still in the same space. You're still in the same physical thing that you would have been in the middle of the ocean, except you just happen to be on land by land.

[Ben]

Oh, no, I'd be pissed. Because you're not just. It's not like you're out in the middle of the ocean. Like, they don't go that far out. They go from little island to, you know, they go from fun place to fun place. So they were also robbed of all the different fun places that they dock and, you know, all the, I don't know, fun. I wouldn't be pissed. Well, maybe, frankly, I wouldn't do what they did where it's like ask. Take money from the servers. The crew didn't do anything. Why are you taking money out of the tip? You should refuse to pay for the charter. If the boat's. If you have a charter and the boat's broken, then the boat doesn't get. Get paid. That's what I say. I would have said, I'm not paying for this boat. I'm gonna give the money to the. The people who. Absolutely decent vacation, you know.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, because the service was still doing the service. Like you were still receiving the service. I mean, although, that being said, it seemed like they were also a little inept. I mean, they. They took forever to get, like. They never even got those jet skis out and everything. And I don't know why they didn't offer them, like, get, like, a van and, like, drive them to, like, the Dutch side of the island or the French side, whichever side that they weren't on. Why not do that? I don't understand that. But I also just think that, like, I don't know, I think I'd be happy just being on a yacht that didn't really go anywhere. You know, obviously I wanted to go someplace, but I think I would also be like, this is pretty cool. I'm in, like, in a luxury environment. So I want, like. I'm just mad at that guy with his, like, Susan Sontag splash of white hair in his bangs, you know, for being such a dick to this crew.

[Ben]

Well, I just watched that movie. The Humdingers. No, the Wildcats. The Marvel. The New Avengers. Stupid movie, but the Wildcats.

[Ronnie]

Is it. Wait, the Wildcats.

[Ben]

What's it called?

[Ronnie]

No, is it called, like, this? The Essentials. Not the Essentials.

[Ben]

The Thundercat? No, the Thunder.

[Ronnie]

The Thunderbolts.

[Ben]

Thunderbolts. Yeah, the Thunderbolts.

[Ronnie]

The Thunderbolts.

[Ben]

The Thunderbolts. Yeah. The New Avengers. Yeah. That was kind of dumb.

[Ronnie]

Where I came up. I don't know where I came up with the Essentials. Oh, I think I was thinking of the Eternals. And then I thought of the Essentials.

[Ben]

The Eternals needed some more essential oils. I'll tell you, that movie needed. Because they were. That was the old ones. They needed. They were all crinkly. They needed some essential oils. That one was stupid, too. But no, the Thunderbolts. Anyway, the villain was stupid.

[Ronnie]

I can't believe it.

[Ben]

Yeah, I know. I was so shocked. Julia Louis Dreyfus was the villain, and she has, like, that shock of white hair. So I kept thinking of her with this character. I was like, you're a real Julia Louis Dreyfuss in that TV show. She was in, like, the Vice. Vice or whatever. But Veep. God, how old am I that I'm like this now? I'm like that movie Thunder. Thundercats. And then, you know that girl Julie Andrews, from the TV show about being a mayor called Vice? Like, Jesus Christ, old lady. But also, he was kind of like Kyle McLahan from Twin Peaks. Right. He gave me Lachlan McLaughlin. Yeah. And he was very like, we really appreciate the cruise, but we really think that if there is a discrepancy, then we shouldn't be able to tip, like, get it out. Spit it out. Facelift. Mm.

[Ronnie]

I'm sure. I'm sure a lot of people would have the Same thing to say about whatever restaurants you own, sir. So I guess we should get into this. So, previously, Barbara and Jess went on a date and continued a love triangle. That is really one of the dullest things we've seen in quite some time. This trio. This trio of pussy that's happening here. So then three hours.

[Ben]

Lesbianism just goes so quick, you know? I mean, we. We're robbed of, like, a whole two years of fun in straight relationships. Because I feel like when we see straight relationships on Bravo, they're very like, catch me. You know, catch me if you can, tee. And then it's like, you're together, but are we together? And do I still like it? There's a lot more of that. Whereas I feel like the lesbian version is like, okay, I'll cheat on you with a million people and not really be sure. But then once I am sure, it's like, boom, we're married. We're there. We're cuddling. We have children together. Yeah, they're just already very boring. It's like they're both like. They're like, can I get in your. In your bed? And we'll read to each other. We'll read each other's Kindle. Oh, my God.

[Ronnie]

They're like act three, but they don't have an act two. Yeah, yeah.

[Ben]

They're already, like, making jam on a farm, you know?

[Ronnie]

That sounds great. So it's three hours.

[Ben]

You're a lesbian. You're basically a lesbian.

[Ronnie]

I know. I know. And Selene walks by Hugo and Jess on the deck, and Hugo is asking Celine how she's doing. And Celine's like, good. And then he goes like, good. And then Slain just keeps on walking by. So they're like, oh, God, she's being really cold this morning. It's like, yeah, she's being really cold. I'm making. Making me wonder. I wonder if the consequences of my actions is that I met her cold.

[Ben]

I did this to myself with the. With my actions of how I treated her. And I need to learn to accept that.

[Ronnie]

I need to learn that if I want to like someone, that I can't do these things because they will be called to me in the morning. And I'm learning that now.

[Ben]

Hugo is a pretty boring person. And he's new, so he's, I think, escaping our wrath so far. But I'm not liking Hugo this episode. Like, Hugo is giving a lot of, like, hey, honey, you should smile. More energy. Like, what the. What. What was she supposed to do, give you a parade? You said hi. As she passed by, she said hi back. What do you need, Hugo? What do you need? And I don't need you coming after the chef. You're not in the position yet. While you're sitting there eating your combos or whatever the. You're eating down on the mess hall and not taking out the trash to be giving attitude to anybody, sir. Yeah.

[Ronnie]

I did not like Hugo this episode. I feel like we saw more of his true colors. I think he has been obscured by the stupid love love triangle and with all of Kyle's nonsense. But now he's. Now we're seeing him, and we see who he really is, and I don't like it. So then speaking of not liking, then we have Demo, who also is not great, and Kyle, who's also. They are. These. All these people suck. So Damo is talking to Kyle. They really do. Yeah, he's talking to Kyle in the Lazarette, which. What? I don't even remember what the Lazarette is, but that sounds. Lazarette sounds like someone who might be like, on the new Real Housewives of London because everyone's talking about the Real Housewives of London because there's someone named Panthea on there. So I feel like there should be someone. Like, I don't. I adore the queen, Mum, but that doesn't mean I'm keeping mum about anything. Lazarette.

[Ben]

Or it could be like, Lazarus, but a woman. You know? Like, I'm the only person here who's 170 years old and has been brought back from the dead, and I'm not scared of anybody.

[Ronnie]

They say all save the Queen, but guess what? The queen is me. The queen is me.

[Ben]

I knew Jesus. A sister tagline. She's like, I knew Jesus. Lazarus. They're like, lazarette. Could you give us something Whittier? One more wind? You need a new Jesus. Like, we know Lazaro. Okay. I love that.

[Ronnie]

Lazarette is like the Toadette version of the Bible. Like, well, we have Lazarus. Why don't we make a Lazarette?

[Ben]

Come on, let's make the Bible fair. It's like a major overhaul of the.

[Ronnie]

Bible, giving everyone an et Abraham et Mozette.

[Ben]

The least creative redo names.

[Ronnie]

Ramzet. Pharaoh. Ramzet. Gisette. Gisette.

[Ben]

Jesusette.

[Ronnie]

Mariette. Mariette. Mariette.

[Ben]

Mariette.

[Ronnie]

Bonvoy.

[Ben]

She's already a lady. Let's make Mary a double lady. Let's give Mary double vaginas. We'll just marry that.

[Ronnie]

Let's have her lean into her femininity for this all female version of the Bible.

[Ben]

Okay, so Damon, Kyle are talking. And Kyle's like, oh, I'm good. You know, I'm just trying to keep my head down, you know, not saying anything stupid, you know, because I'm not supposed to talk to anybody or do anything. What am I supposed to do here and just stand here? I can't even talk to the guests. Yeah, Kyle, I don't think. It's not. You're not allowed to talk to the guests. You're not allowed to stick your penis inside of them. You understand? Why are you making a sound? Why are you making it sound like someone said you can't speak to the guests?

[Ronnie]

It's like he's doing that thing where he's, like, complaining, but then pretending like he's taking responsibility. He'd be like, nowhere. I can't even. Can't even hang out with the guests. I just have to stand here by the side. Even though I'm so good with the guests. I'll just stand here by the side. But these are the quant consequences to my actions. So that's what it is. Like, don't. You can't just add that asterisk on. We know you don't believe it sincerely. And, like, why are you surprised? Because you either fucked a guest or you lied about a guest on tv. And either way, like, you should be reprimanded and really fired, to be honest.

[Ben]

Wait a minute. Are we discussing the consequences of our actions? Because I brought some snacks. I would love to have this conversation as well. So, Damo, speaking of taking false responsibility for things or falsely taking. Falsely acting like you're taking response. You know what I'm trying to say? Damo, is there like, oh, just wanted to say, mate, I feel so guilty for talking to Frazier. And to prove how guilty I feel, I'm gonna put my arm up here and give you my armpit here. Talk to my armpit here. Feel real guilty for talking to Frazier, mate. And he's like, I get it, mate. You know, it's just one of those ones where I knew you weren't doing it. Male, you know the word.

[Ronnie]

I know you weren't doing it maleficently. And so he's like, yeah, no, I don't. I just want to make sure that, you know, I were all sweet. He's like, yeah, no stress, mate. It is what it is. So then Kyle tells us, well, you know, with his arms, like, he's got his arms crossed and he's shaking his chair in the Confessional with that, like, that still undisclosed black eye that he has. Like, he's had a scar around his eye all season. Like, it was, like, bruised up in the. Early in the season in the interviews, he clearly got into a fight and he's like, well, it's a wake up call in a professional sense and also in, like, how you trust other people. You know, he could have just kept his mouth short. He's not. He's not got a good track record anyway. I mean, it just proves that I've got to watch where I keep my alliances or you don't up in the first place. I mean, yeah, like, Damo for sure was being ratty when he told Fraser. He knew he was escalating it and he was being gossipy. But Kyle also told, like, he mouthed off about this to, like, half of the boat. This was not something told in confidence. Like, he said it to enough people that it was going to get around anyway. And so I just think it was.

[Ben]

But, you know, Damo is supposed to be his, like, little bestie on the boat. And Damo, Damo did beat Damo straight up. Did betray him, I think. But it's hard to stick with. So in the wrong. It's like, yeah, I just wish it had been someone else who betrayed him. But I don't like Damo, like, running to Fraser and doing it like that. You know, I thought that was a little weak.

[Ronnie]

But at the same time, he doesn't stand in it. He doesn't stand in it. He's not like. Well, I honestly, I went to Fraser because I thought it was. I thought it was messed up and I felt like I had to do it. And as much as I love you, I have to, like, I take this job seriously. Instead, he's like, oh, Fraser, guess what I heard. Oh, Kyle, sorry, I didn't. I shouldn't have done that, you know?

[Ben]

Yeah. So now Fraser's in the galley with chef, and he's like, chef, the lunch. Do we have lunch coming? He's like, oh, the food for the menu. I'm doing, like a summer salad for them. There'll be octopus. If the octopus gives me one piece of attitude, I will slam it face, because I demand respect. I'm badass chef now. Maybe I was beat. I was telling octopus. Maybe I was beat up as a child. But now. I killed you. I killed you, Octopus. You want a piece of me? No, I'm gonna have a piece of you. You want it? He's like throwing rags against the wall. Yeah, okay. All right.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, that thing. I am badass chef now. I can punch switches on walls and also throw tea towels at stoves. Cuz I am badass. And this trip is going to be very challenging for me because we have a lot of restrictions and flash. I had a flashback here. I have a flashback to remember last year when there were a lot of restrictions and it like, really messed me up. And oh my God, there's so many choices. And I'm a little nervous because last season all the food restrictions, like, they fucked me over. But now this year when I see a food restriction, I throw a little rag at it and it is solved.

[Ben]

Yeah. And we see a piece of last year where he's staring at the board because when he. That was his big dyslexia reveal. When he's like, oh, I'm not from risotto, I have dyslexia. And we watch and like, the words are like flying around in his head. And then he's. He comes to it, he's like, mushroom risotto. So that was fun to see again. And Fraser is like, all right, what are we doing for charcuterie? Two plates. Because one is going to be vegan, one is going to be normal, and if the vegan one gives the normal one any attitude, charcuteries are going to fight. That's what's going to happen.

[Ronnie]

So Jess is with Celine. She's like, are you okay? Yeah, I'm okay, thank you. You sure? Yes. And then Hugo walks up and he's like, hey, Jesse poo. And she's selen. He basically like, pulls Jess out of there and she's like, like, thank you. You saved me from our conversation. A conversation that was the consequence of my actions. And I'm realizing now that if there's someone I like, I have to just like them. He's like, okay, that's fine. Like, help me with the anchor.

[Ben]

Yeah. And she goes, but I slept in Barbara's bed. He goes, oh, come on. Like, you're in a leadership position. You can't do that. You can't do that unless you're the boson.

[Ronnie]

Okay?

[Ben]

It's like, oh, good point there. He says, you can't just sleep in the same cabin with someone you just broke up with. And the new person, I think she can because Solene's made out with everybody on this boat. And so Lane running around here crying. And Solene admits it too. She's like, I don't know why I'm the one crying because I was making out with other people too. That's kind of how I feel. You can't play with everybody's emotions and then pretend it's no big deal, and then now it's suddenly a big deal when it happens. I think, I don't feel for you, but I like you.

[Ronnie]

I don't think that she should have done it. I don't think she should have done it because it's just messy. Like, yes, Elaine may have, like, gone and made out with a bunch of people, but it's just messy. And it also is, like, it also does not. It sort of. It doesn't clarify things. Like, are you, like. Are you still trying to, like, make Celine feel a certain sort of way by sleeping under her? I don't know. I just think she should have had Barbara come to her room. I don't know why they don't. Why that's not even a consideration.

[Ben]

Yeah, I can see that. Because I just feel like she went back, you know, she did it to Barbara and she did it to Solane, and they have no problem. I don't know. I think she set the tone for it, Solene. She set the tone for being messy and not caring about anybody's feelings. So enjoy your karma is what I say.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, I didn't like it. I didn't like it.

[Ben]

There's only so many tiny beds to share. And how about the other cabin? I don't want you guys cuddling and doing whatever you're doing in the cabin anyway. Can I try to sleep? People who need to fuck on the boat do like everybody else does and go fuck on the cat cradle or whatever that thing is, or the. Yeah, the guest cabin or whatever.

[Ronnie]

My feeling is really just that, like, I don't really care so much about Celine's feelings in this. I just. I'm like, I don't want to hear you talk about how you've learned about, like, the consequences to your actions and how you've got grown or whatever and you're still doing something that's messy. It's like, it's still messy. So, like, just, like, just don't do it anymore. Like, I just don't want to. I don't want to. It's more like, I don't want to see you put yourself in a situation where there. There could be ramifications. And then you say, oh, God, in retrospect, I really shouldn't have done that. Like, I. If I have to sit through another one of those scenes, I'm going to be mad. So just don't do it in the first place. I'm really angry today. I'm really, really sassed off. I think that, I think the, I think that guy, Susan Sontag guy really put me in a state of mind here. I'm like not happy about any of this.

[Ben]

It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Grappens commercial.

[Ronnie]

Sometimes work is so intense. There's so much for us to do. There's so much for us to recap that I actually get very stressed out. And thankfully I have therapy to turn to and I think it's really, really important. I call it a mind massage. I love therapy. It helps me out so much.

[Ben]

Finding a therapist is hard enough, but finding one who actually takes your insurance, that's where most online therapy platforms fall short. Many don't work with insurance at all, which means you're stuck paying the full cost out of pocket or paying for an expensive monthly subscription.

[Ronnie]

Rula does things differently. They partner with over 100 insurance plans, making the average copay just $15 per session. That's real therapy from licensed professionals at a price that actually makes sense.

[Ben]

Rula considers your goals, your preferences and background to provide you with a curated list of licensed in network therapists who are actually aligned with what you need.

[Ronnie]

Thousands of people are already using Rula to get affordable, high quality therapy that's actually covered by Insurance. Visit rula.com crappens to get started. After you sign up, you'll be asked how you heard about them. Please support our show and let them know we sent you. That's r u l a.com crappens. You deserve mental health care that works with you, not against your budget.

[Ben]

Oh, summer is winding down. But you know what? It's good to get back into a routine and I think it's time to refresh my style for the new season. I'm looking for a lot of new stuff. I'm always looking for new stuff to refresh my style. And the best place to do it is where I do it. Always. Wayfair.

[Ronnie]

I know Wayfair is exactly where I go for a nice little refresh. Whether it's my office, whether it's some dining room stuff. I love what Wayfair does.

[Ben]

Wayfair is great. I use it for the outdoors, I use it for the indoors. One of my favorite things about it is I can afford to get stuff from there and get it put together. So I'm not always having to sit here and put it together. People actually will come and put this stuff together and it all looks so, so good.

[Ronnie]

Wayfair makes it easy to tackle your home goals with endless inspiration for every space and budget.

[Ben]

Wayfair's huge selection of outdoor items makes it easy to find exactly what's right for you.

[Ronnie]

Get organized, refreshed, and back to routine. For way less, head to Wayfair.com right now to shop all things home.

[Ben]

That's W-A-Y-F-A-I-R.com Wayfair. Every style, every home. So then we go to Rainbow and Damo, and they're talking about how it's the next charter, and he's kind of flirting. He's like, oh, I don't know if I'm ready for the next chart. I think, oh, my God. I think your bicep is ready. Look at that. Wow. What guns. Really love those. Don't we have a sexy thing going on? Do you think they're, like, kind of together?

[Ronnie]

It seems like they are getting a very slow burn, but it may be so slow that it may never actually burn.

[Ben]

Imagine we'll get with Jamo. That burn's gonna be much quicker. It's gonna come on much quicker.

[Ronnie]

It's gonna be a lot of probably monthly, either. Monthly and for the rest of your life. So now Kyle go pulls Solene because he wants to apologize to her and everything. And then, of course, while he. They're going off to talk, then Jess and Barbara are talking, and Jess is like, see, this is why I don't want. This is why I do not approve of her sleeping in the same room. Because now we have to sit through this. I feel really bad that I slept in your bed last night. And when I first tried to speak to her at the bar, she wasn't even looking at me. I'm like, jaz, honestly, at this point, just throw yourself off the boat. I'm just. I can't. I like, you just keep on making these very simple mistakes. And then you're like, but now she is mad at me. It's like, girl, duh. Yeah, use some common sense.

[Ben]

Barbara's not bothered at all. She's like, well, the raspberries we are growing for the jam are ready for harvesting, so it's time to get to. To stomping.

[Ronnie]

It's like, okay, yeah, you don't want to make the jam. That is not nice.

[Ben]

That's not nice.

[Ronnie]

She said it today. Did you notice? At one point she goes, that's not nice. That's not nice.

[Ben]

That's not nice. I don't like that. Then we go to Carl and Selene having their talk on the deck. And Carl's like, oh, I'm genuinely sorry. Sorry for coming at you like I did. It was very rude. You didn't deserve that. I was very, very arrogant. You know, still kind of shaking and, like, doing that, like, little. He rolls, like, really little cigarettes. And he just looks like a shaky guy asking for a dollar. He really does. And his nose is still all red. And she's like, oh, it wasn't the first time someone's speaking to me like that. It wasn't the first time. I'm sure you piss off a lot of people.

[Ronnie]

So lame.

[Ben]

It's like, I've spoken to. I'm speaking to, like that in traffic. I don't. Whatever.

[Ronnie]

Well, I apologize for being such an arrogant prick. And she's like, it's okay. It's like, put it to bed. You go that way, I go this way. Oh, but we are on same boat. There's only the one way. So we go both that way. But then we. Maybe I walk backwards, you walk forward.

[Ben]

Why would you walk. Why would you walk that way?

[Ronnie]

Why walk forward same way and same boat, same direction?

[Ben]

I meant it figuratively. Oh, now you are talking about my figure. No, we are not in this place no more. No more. I decided to accept apologize from Scottish because he said, you know, he's got his. She's stupid, but I like him. He's stupid, but nice stupid. You know, when people hurt, they can be crazy. We're human. We're not perfect. Scottish is very far to be perfect. Scottish is not children, but.

[Ronnie]

All right, all right, Hugo. Hugo. I'm heading to the fly bridge, which, as we know, is the tiny bridge that flies use to cross from one side of St. Martin to another.

[Ben]

I'm going to the fly bridge, otherwise known as the Jeff Goldblum Bridge. You might be there. I'll be pooping on my food to help me digest it.

[Ronnie]

You might be wondering why the flies don't use their wings. Well, guess what it's called. Sometimes they like to have a rest. All right, meet you over there.

[Ben]

I'll be up there spitting vomit on an apple. All right, anybody's up there to join me?

[Ronnie]

The fly bridge, which, as we all know, is where the people of St. Martin transport their zippers from one end of the island to another. The fly bridge.

[Ben]

It's also where I go up there and pop my collar a little bit, wear acid jeans, and do the Roger Rabbit. Right? Is that still considered fly these days?

[Ronnie]

Pretty fly for a white guy.

[Ben]

So, yeah, he goes up there and they are having engine trouble. He goes like, yeah, obviously all the outboard stuff, sweat. He's like, yeah, for the sake of it looking pretty. Or rather. Oh, no, he's checking over the boat. So this is where Carrie is getting all anal over the boat. And he's like, all right, for the sake of things looking good. I'd like the dick to be dry. Do you understand? Dry decks look better than wet dicks, right? Why are we talking about wet dicks? I feel like that's really inappropriate. All right, all right, listen here. I don't want to get this dick wet is what I'm trying to say before they. Before the guests come. Last time the game, the guests were here, the problem was wet dick. All right? So let's fix that.

[Ronnie]

All right?

[Ben]

All right.

[Ronnie]

Okay. All right, Fraser, let's look at this bathroom here now. Okay, now this countertop looks nice. The pink is looking wonderful. Okay, the towels, we should have two towers on the countertop and one by the toilet. So two in the pink, one by the stink. All right, and then. Why are you looking at me that way, Fraser?

[Ben]

It's the pink, sir. It's the pink. All right, well, carry on. I'm gonna stop pooping down here. This is a lovely bathroom. This is the loveliest bathroom we'd ever have. Pooping in this bathroom would be an adventure.

[Ronnie]

All right, Anthony, let's look at your. Your galley. This looks clean. Let me look at the refrigerator. Okay, let's see, we've got here, we got milk, milk, lemonade. Okay, around the corner. Oh, that's what the chocolate's made. Stick your finger. If you stick it. Now, Anthony, if you stick your finger in this thing. Oops, it's a Tootsie Roll. I am not following.

[Ben]

Why can't I think of any of those? I feel extremely mature for not having those in my lexicon.

[Ronnie]

I don't know if there's many more after that. You know, it's like I always say, you wake up in the morning, put your feet on the floor, it's a 50 yard dash to the bathroom door. Diarrhea. Am I right, everyone?

[Ben]

Now you're just talking about pooping.

[Ronnie]

Well, now I have a question. Do we have any air freshener? Smells nice in here. Although to be fair, whoever smelt it, dealt it.

[Ben]

All right, we're past sexual innuendo now and just straight on to bodily fluids.

[Ronnie]

Whoever didn't. Whoever. Whoever did the rhyme did the crime. Am I right?

[Ben]

I will not take the blame for another season. I Will not be villainized.

[Ronnie]

Oh, really? Because whoever denied it supplied it. I think that's it. That's all I have.

[Ben]

So Rainbow and Barbara do some laundry, and Barbara's like, oh, how is so and so doing? She's like, I don't know, nor do I care. That's what you get for messing with Rainbow. Rainbow has turned into rain. Rainbow. Okay, Rainbow. I don't care. I don't care if she's even living right now. I don't care if she's breathing. And that's what happens when you. With the bow.

[Ronnie]

With the bow. You're gonna get the horns of the rainbow, which I know rainbows don't have horns, but if they had horns, you would be getting them.

[Ben]

And rainbow presence. They have horns, but they're spelled. H E A U R N S horns.

[Ronnie]

I'm a little happy that Jess is with Barbs and not with Celine. This is karma coming to bite her in the ass.

[Ben]

Ha.

[Ronnie]

So now guests are coming soon.

[Ben]

By the way, we see Celine falling down the stairs again.

[Ronnie]

Oh, yeah, sorry. How many times does she have to fall down?

[Ben]

It's like the power of Rainbow Psycho. Yeah, you want to mess with me and my good friend Barbs? You know we're good friends because I call her Barbs now.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, Barbs. So guesser Robin gets arriving and Kyle, he's like, well, I hope these guests are actually fun, but I'm. I'm not allowed to speak to them, so I've got to stay away from the guests. Or poor Kyle. Poor Kyle. Stuck a nook in the corner, not able to talk to any of the guests. Don't y' all feel sad for me?

[Ben]

So then a good illustration this episode of what happens when someone is soft self sabotaging. Which is basically what he was doing, right? He's like, I'm just gonna get shit faced. I'm gonna do what I know I shouldn't do. Get so drunk that I'm evil, fuck a guest, brag about fucking the guests. I'm gonna get fired. I'm gonna. I'm gonna throw all of this good that I've built up out the window. But then people don't let you. Because he's like, what am I still doing here? You were supposed to fire me. And now we're seeing him spin out like he's trapped because he didn't get to get fired.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, he. He didn't sabotage well enough.

[Ben]

Yeah, it's too bad.

[Ronnie]

Too bad.

[Ben]

So from self sabotage. And that was a disservice to You.

[Ronnie]

He sabotages. Sabotage. So the guests arrive, and now they get the tour, and it's 12:37pm now, this is important because everything that happens right now does not even happen at 12:30 nor 12:35. It's at 12:37, and it's time to depart. And care's like, all right, I'm gonna thrust the starboard with a port wash. Like, well, you're gonna pour some after dinner wine off the side of the boat. No, it means something else entirely. All right, let's look. Any wash. Any wash. Hugo, do you see any wash?

[Ben]

I don't wash. There's no wash. Still no wash. As you wash. No wash. Nope Wash. Hold on, hold on. I see. No, there's no watch. That wasn't watching.

[Ronnie]

All right, okay, how about this? Look to the left. Now look back to the right real quickly.

[Ben]

Wash. I can't see right now.

[Ronnie]

Okay, countdown walking.

[Ben]

One wash. I'm in the water. I'm in the. Man overboard. Somebody.

[Ronnie]

All right, no, if you're in the water, that does not count as wash, even though you are well washed.

[Ben]

Well, I've been washed. I smell like fish. I smell like fish. But I'm here. I'm back. I'm back. All right, all right, all right, all right.

[Ronnie]

I'm gonna radio. I'm gonna radio. Andrew. Andrew. Andrew, it's Carrie. Andrew, it's your big moment. It's the time when you get to come on on camera. And so now we have.

[Ben]

I'd like to call all of the people who actually run this boat to the deck, please. To the bridge. Let's just have a little BTs here, all right? Of people who actually do work on this boat. So we get all the schlubby people who actually work on the boat. Campton.

[Ronnie]

It's all the Monty Moles. They all arrive.

[Ben]

They're like bowling shirts. Their butt cracks are hanging out.

[Ronnie]

Right?

[Ben]

Yeah. All right. What you mean here? What can I do for you, Cap?

[Ronnie]

You know on Super Mario Brothers, Monty Mole, who, like, pokes his head up from the ground with, like, the. The. The manhole cover on his head and throws a wrench. That's who these guys are.

[Ben]

Yeah, I hate that.

[Ronnie]

They pop up and they're like, we're ready for you, boss.

[Ben]

So they're like, the non TV ready people.

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Ben]

Hold on. Productions insisting I wear man Spanx. So hold on. Oh, God, that's too tight.

[Ronnie]

The producer's like, okay, could someone tell the PA who's guarding the ugly person door to unlock it and let them Out. Thank you.

[Ben]

Over. Now please be ready with paper bags to put over these guys head. They're gonna have to go on camera.

[Ronnie]

All right, Please make sure all microphones are far away. We do not want to get their disgusting phlegmy voices on camera.

[Ben]

Can we get the extras who actually have jobs from Fred Flintstones bowling alley up here in the bridge?

[Ronnie]

Can we, can we ask the attracting people to line up a series of hoses so that way by the time they get out of their ugly room and get to the captain's quarters, they can be washed off?

[Ben]

I'm sorry, they're only allowed out of their cages with the code. Ugly. You ain't got no alibi, you ugly. Yeah, yeah, you ugly. Okay, they're out. They're coming on up, Captain.

[Ronnie]

I like that one. Hold on. Guests, excuse me. I'm just going to encourage you to look at the island of Saint Mond while we, the members of the interior, are going to hold up some bed sheets so you don't have to see the atrocities that are emerging on the other side of this boat. All right? Human tunnel has been created in case.

[Ben]

Anybody has to let one go. This is the lazarette. It's the bathroom that knew Jesus on the Real Housewives of London. Please enjoy yourselves.

[Ronnie]

All right, America, this is what you need to know before you leave. You always test the steering on each station, on each engine and on the bow thruster. And if they. If they don't see a wash, it's not working. Losing a wing station is a massive problem because then if you don't have a wing station, I mean, you might want. Why'd you order all that ranch, am I right? So I can't leave.

[Ben]

No one wants a dry wing. And that's just the God forsaken truth Raw there for you on your plate.

[Ronnie]

I mean, is there anything more awkward than having a bag full of celery sticks and a jug full of ranch and no wing station?

[Ben]

It's like having a chocolate fountain with no cookies to dip it into. What's the point? What is the point? Will this marriage last? No one will know until next week on Below Dick Adventure.

[Ronnie]

So the problem is that basically he says like, okay, here we go. Each of the stations go to a central brain. And unfortunately, as you may have seen, there's not a single brain on this boat this entire season.

[Ben]

It's kind of the theme of the season. There is no central brain. All right, we've got a problem with one of the controllers on the boat. I'm not Leaving with anything. Not at 100. Hold on, hold on. I've got a call. Mickey. Yeah, you're still trying to drive there. All right, just back it in. I don't care. It. It'll. They'll. There'll be lights that warned the lady to get out. You just hit the lady, did you? All right, have your mother deal with it. God, it's hard being away from my son. All right, fix the boat. All right, get out of here, ugly people. We're sick of looking at you.

[Ronnie]

Like I was saying, I'm not leaving this doc with anything. Not at 100, except for the capabilities of my crew. So basically, these. The. The ugly people are there and they're trying to fix it. And they're like, this thing's flashing, but that thing's not flashing.

[Ben]

Poor guys are, like, literally not ugly. We're so terrible. They're so cute.

[Ronnie]

Actually, often they're really hot. Remember, actually, Malia started dating one because he was so hot.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Ronnie]

They just standards.

[Ben]

Oh, yeah.

[Ronnie]

Remember? Yeah.

[Ben]

Well, Malia also talked to them because they were the only people not exposed to her wretchedness.

[Ronnie]

The original demo.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Ronnie]

So now Silane and Barbara are the tattletale, you mean.

[Ben]

Is that what you're saying?

[Ronnie]

Yeah.

[Ben]

Original rant.

[Ronnie]

The original.

[Ben]

The original rant.

[Ronnie]

Selena, Barbara are in the main salon bar, and Barbara's like, we need to talk. I really want to speak to you about yesterday. And first I'm going to apologize because you're my friend and I don't think it was nice what happened.

[Ben]

It wasn't nice. And you know what happened? That wasn't nice. It was me this time. It was me. It wasn't nice. I wasn't nice. Bad me. I like, I like good me. I like nice me. Not nice. Not, not, not, not, not nice me. That was a lot of nuts. I don't know, but I'm sorry.

[Ronnie]

Okay. Yes. Just sleeping there, you know? But, like, whatever is going to happen between you and me is okay.

[Ben]

There's no worries.

[Ronnie]

I'm just processing Baba.

[Ben]

You know, how she move on, like, for Baba without explaining to me? I don't know. It's not good. But I kiss the other person also. So I realized the cons. Are we having a conversation about consequences? I'm in my own confessional. Get out of here. Get out of here.

[Ronnie]

These are the consequences of interrupting someone else's confession. And I have to accept that. I deserved that.

[Ben]

I deserved it. So the first bowling alley guy is like, well, something going on there. That's for sure. On the starboard engine somewhere. We're gonna see if we can take control. Take control? Well, can't take control, I guess. Shut the engines down. That's what you do on a boat. Okay, get that thing. It's called the wheel, captain, okay? It's the wheel. And by the way, I say captain in quotes, right? Don't even know how to drive this stupid boat.

[Ronnie]

Hey, Fred. Just gonna start checking the fuses, okay? And Terry's like radio. Alright, sounds good. It's like. All right, we're gonna try to turn it on. Fred.

[Ben]

Oh, it's not working, Fred. Hey, Fred. I got two fingers in a hole and another thumb in the other hole. It's like the mouth hole. It's not working, Fred.

[Ronnie]

Well, I gotta say, Bernie, hold on, let me just see what's happening on the outside of this boat. And now let me just walk right back on the password. God damn it. Dino locked me out of the yacht again.

[Ben]

Carry. All right, you know, listen, the yacht. Let me. Let me tell you something, all right? I'm gonna need to talk to Hugo and Fraser. Haven't both come up here. All right, both of you. I wanted to say this to both of you so I don't have to tell you each individually. The lazarette is the place to poop. Second, the boat's broken. All right? It's just broken. Yacht stuck. I don't know when we can leave, but I know it's not today. This could kill our season. The season could be dead.

[Ronnie]

Oh, wow. Okay, so that's scary commercials.

[Ben]

Here comes one right now. Searching for a romantic summer getaway escape with Rich Girl Summer, the new audible.

[Ronnie]

Original from Lily Chu, the exquisitely talented Philippa sue. Returning to narrate her her fifth Lily Chew title.

[Ben]

This time, Philippa is joined by her real life husband, Steven Pasquale from Rescue Me and American Son.

[Ronnie]

Set in Toronto's wealthy cottage country, AKA the Hamptons of Canada, Rich Girl Summer follows the story of Valerie, a down on her luck event planner, posing as a socialite's long lost daughter. While piecing together the secrets surrounding a mysterious family and falling deeper and deeper in love with the impossibly hard to reach Reid and infuriatingly handsome family assistant Nico.

[Ben]

Caught between pretending to belong and unexpectedly finding where she truly fits in, Valerie learns her summer is about to get far more complicated than she ever planned. She's in over her head and head over heels.

[Ronnie]

Fake heiress, real secrets.

[Ben]

Listen to Rich Girl Summer now on audible. Go to audible.com richgirlsommar oh, hey.

[Ronnie]

Hey.

[Ben]

Thanks for meeting me here on such short notice. This place isn't bugged, is it? Bugged?

[Ronnie]

Wait, Jamie, what's going on?

[Ben]

It's just you're my only lawyer friend and I need your professional opinion. Do you see that brand new Hyundai Tucson out there?

[Ronnie]

Yeah, that's all I paid for it.

[Ben]

Ah, I think I need to get.

[Ronnie]

Back to you on that.

[Ben]

Do you know what you want? Yeah, I do now.

[Ronnie]

Deal. So right it almost feels wrong. Get the car or SUV you've always.

[Ben]

Wanted, plus America's best warranty at the Hyundai getaway getaway sales event. The guilt is real, but so is the savings. Listen, I don't want to get in your business, but if that's all she paid for it, I'll have what she's having. It's a great day for a new Hyundai at the Hyundai getaway sales event going on now.

[Ronnie]

Get 0% APR for 60 months plus 0 payments for 90 days on all.

[Ben]

Hyundai Palisade, Santa Fe and Santa Fe hybrid models. And check out our other great deals at your Hyundai dealer today. Offer end September 2nd.

[Ronnie]

Call 562-314-4603 for details. So now we go to. It's 1:15pm so Fraser is like. Okay, Ladies and gentlemen of the guest quarters, I have an announcement to make. First of all, I am hideous. We can just address that right now. Second of all, please welcome to the stage the one and only Captain Carrie. Captain Carrie, you have the floor. Captain Carrie.

[Ben]

Does he even come up there? Oh, yeah, I do. Come here. I do. Come here, everybody. Can we just give a round of applause to Fraser for that lovely intro. Also, Fraser, you're not as fat as you think. All right? Can we just tell Fraser he's not as fantasy? Thanks, everybody. All right, we'll find a shorter way to say that. Get out of here. Get out of here.

[Ronnie]

Thank you. But just, I want to say that it doesn't really mean much coming from all you fat people, okay? I need to be judged by skinny people. Thank you so much.

[Ben]

I will only be judged by a jury of my peers, unfortunately. So. All right, how we all doing? Great. Good to be here. Good to see you. All right, so we're having some mechanical issues with the boat. I cannot take control of the boat from the stations. Even all the rubbles downstairs are confused. So we're going to be stuck here tonight. And what I can offer you, Let me tell you, this is going to be exciting. Nothing. All right? Absolutely nothing. You want to take out a couple of bikes that's great. There's no land. You want to take out a couple of Jet Skis. Don't have anyone capable of getting them out. All right. Do we have Bogle on board? We do not. Can't even shake up a bunch of little letters in a plastic box and turn them into words. You're all fucked. All right. Hope you got good high school stories to share. All right. Even you, Carl McLahan. What the hell? Is that a real haircut? Who lifted your face? Have it put back. It's too tight, brother. All right. I'll be watching Netflix.

[Ronnie]

I am obsessed with the way you say McLaughlin. I have to say, I've never heard it said mispronounced that way. McLahan.

[Ben]

I thought it was Kyle McLahan. McLaughlin. Wait, how do you say it? Yeah, Kyle McLaughlin.

[Ronnie]

McLahan. McLahan is kind of amazing. Well, now I'm. Now I'm paranoid. Maybe it is McLahan, but I'm pretty sure it's Colin McLaughlin.

[Ben]

Okay, can we just go over all the times you've been right and I've been wrong on this show? You're right. I'm pretty sure. Just like, let's just go by the numbers. I'm pretty sure you're right on this one.

[Ronnie]

But I do love that Kyle McLahan. So then Shannon Beador possesses a guest named David who goes, are you kidding me? Are you kidding me?

[Ben]

And Ron. Ron's like, I know we've got to be moving. David, we've got to be moving. And David's like, we are screwed. So now Fraser is like, anthony, I don't think we're moving today. So what do you mean we are not moving? I have octopus leg, by the way. Can I not be served an entire octopus arm? Like, what the fuck, bro? Did you see the octopus he served? It's like this thick. As thick as a human arm. I need, like, fins. No, it's too much. When it's like a gigantic thing like that and you have to cut through the rubberiness and, like, love it's cooked properly.

[Ronnie]

It's beautiful. But I know what you're saying. You want it to be a little bit more manageable.

[Ben]

Yeah, Dainty. Yeah. I don't want a monster from the fucking 20,000 leagues under the Sea, you know what I mean? I want, like, a little dainty child that was killed. Not Methuselah.

[Ronnie]

Not like the lazarette of octopuses.

[Ben]

Wait, is Methuselah the one that came back to life in the Bible? Or Lazarus was the really Old one. Methuselah was the one that came back to life, right?

[Ronnie]

No, Methuselah is the old one. I don't know who Lazarus is, to be honest. I'm Jewish, and I don't know this.

[Ben]

Part of the Bible. I think Lazarus is old, testy.

[Ronnie]

I just. Oh, well, in that case, I'm just uninformed.

[Ben]

Jewish Lazarus can refer to several things, notably a figure from the Bible, a software or a TV series in the Bible. Lazarus of Bethany. Oh, my God. All right, I'm Lazarus. Hey, it's me, Lazarus. You know what? I love mana Mana. This mana is delicious. I got this manna from the mana store down the street. It's the best one in the Hamptons. It's the best man the street in the Hamptons.

[Ronnie]

Okay, I'm trying this mana. You know what? It's good. I don't know if I would spend 40 days and 40 nights eating it, but, you know, it's all right. It's all right. It's all salt.

[Ben]

40 days and 40 nights is how long he fasted, not how long he ate. That's how I do a fast. I do the opposite of the Jesus diet. I just eat manna. Okay. Lazarus of Bethany is a man whom Jesus raised from the dead. There where you go. There you go.

[Ronnie]

Oh, so this is like a small. This is like Lazarette is like a lady that Jesus resurrected. Or maybe just like, a small version of the man. It's a Lazarus.

[Ben]

Yeah, yeah. He was resurrected after being dead for four days, which, honestly, I would have told Jesus if I was there back then in the New Testament, I would have been like, jesus, it's been too long. Like, you can bring Lazarus back to life, but is Lazarus ever gonna smell the same? No, the decomposition is already starting. He's gonna have a new life where people are always going, does something smell in here? I think it's Lazarus. It's Lazarus.

[Ronnie]

Are we also sure that Lazarus was really dead in the first place? Because this was Lazarus of Bethany, which means that Lazarus was going around being like, oh, my God. Literally, I'm dead. I'm dead. I can't.

[Ben]

I can't.

[Ronnie]

I don't. I don't want it. I'm dead. I'm dead. I'm dead. Like, my walls are up. I'm dead. I'm dead. So Jesus is like, okay, I'll resurrect you. It's like, well, Lazarus was just saying that.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Ronnie]

Was that sacrilegious? I apologize to the Christians for making too much of a Joke out of. Out of the story.

[Ben]

Out of the Bible. Oh, come on. I mean, listen, we're promoting in a way, you know, ain't no press. Like, ain't no bad press. All right? So Anthony is like, we're not on boat anymore. We are like, restaurant, hotel. That is going to work harder because now they're going to eat all. I fuck it up. The tip is going really, really, really down. So let us make the magic happen with French finger. French finger magic. So we know this is going to be an Anthony breakdown episode. You can already see it coming because he's manic about proving himself worthy.

[Ronnie]

So the big plan for these guests is that they're going to essentially move the boat forward a little bit so they can kind of create like, a little pool so everyone can have their. Their dream can come true, which is swim. The gasoline and muck of a yacht harbor. Like, have you ever dreamed about swimming right, where all the exhaust of the yacht comes out? That's what he can do for you.

[Ben]

Where all the otters lay on a rock and poop. Like, you know, in the Santa Monica harbor. That's how it is. They all. All the seals or whatever gather on the rocks. They just lay there, and they're so cute to look at, but all you smell is their poop. Poop. They make mountains of poop and then just lie around on their poop all day and take naps. It's disgusting.

[Ronnie]

Yeah. Yeah. Well, it's not unlike some guests on below deck. So Carrie is like, oh, everyone, we're gonna feel this.

[Ben]

Like, why is there. Why is there lipstick on the toilet?

[Ronnie]

We're gonna use the winches to move the boat forward. But the winches can't sustain that load for a long period of time. So you snap a line, you could take someone's leg or arm off. You pull a bollard, you could kill someone. So watch out for the bollards and the winches, everyone.

[Ben]

I love how on the show, every time they do something on the deck, they're like, all right, we're gonna do this. But it could result in everybody here dying. All right, let's watch this. Pull the winch. Pull the winch. Just pull. Oh, God, you're pulling it too tight. We're almost dead. That would be the consequences of my action. I deserve everything. Take me. Take me.

[Ronnie]

So Carrie goes up to the guests, and they're like, like, so have we got any good news? Well, there is good news. We found out what the problem is. This boat's sinking. We have 36 hours to live. All right. But right now.

[Ben]

Yeah, we found the problem. All right, we're sourcing the part. Now here's. That's the good news. News. We've. So we're sourcing it. Now here's the bad news. We're sourcing it from Timu. All right, now here's some more good news. We're not TEMU to find the part. Got to spin a wheel on getting a hundred dollars off orders of $19 million or more. All right. And I have another chance to spin. Hold on. I got it again. All right, it's all good news. We're on the dock, but I'm getting a lot of polyester pants, possibly a boat pop got if they have it.

[Ronnie]

And here's some more good news. We found some Sudoku puzzles for you, so we're just. We'll distribute those and hope you have a great time for the next three days solving those. All right.

[Ben]

I'm sorry. More of a wordle person. Captain, there's no Internet on this boat. The Internet has broken. All right. We're trying to source Internet right now. It's very, very difficult.

[Ronnie]

All right, Wait, what's this I just heard? Our TEMU arrival has. Has come ahead of schedule, so don't gu. Part has arrived and they're opening up the box right now. And, oh, unfortunately, they just sent a pair of capri pants by accident. So it looks like we'll have to wait another day for the engine part. We order it.

[Ben]

These actually were the pants that Captain Sandy had ordered during her season. They just got here because they were ordered through temu. It's taken a long time and sent to the wrong address, but I do have some nice black polyester capris.

[Ronnie]

All right, we are going to be holding a raffle for the capri pants. It's whoever can finish their Sudoku puzz fastest, win some Capri pants.

[Ben]

This is so, so unfair. And they're only here for three days. These guys are not letting. They're not getting the experience they paid for. And now as stews, we have to be really entertaining. Me, Fraser, the most entertaining person on the planet, is about to really show them what I can do by running around with the tray wobbling and saying, I can't stand this. I want to die.

[Ronnie]

So the deck team is like. Hugo is, like, on the back of the boat being, like, what to do? And he's just standing there. He's just, like, figuring out where to put out the swim platforms. And the guests are drinking espresso martinis. And Kyle is like, what? I feel like I'm very much under the microscope. Don't be around guests, don't say certain things. Don't all the women who are on board, things like that. You know, I'm just trying to do.

[Ben]

The best I can to stay away from them without looking like I'm being rude. They don't care. No one is sitting around being like, hey, that guy with the mop sure is being distant.

[Ronnie]

No one's. No one's saying, that guy who looks like he should be in a Harmony Corinne movie certainly isn't talking to me today.

[Ben]

Harmony Corinne movie. Wow. Wow. You just went for the jugular with that one.

[Ronnie]

By the way, that's the name of two future below deck Steves. I'm sure. Harmony and Corinne.

[Ben]

Harmony and Corinne. Except it'll be spelled like H A R M, H O M O N K N E E Y E E. You remember Bretini? Lol. I can't.

[Ronnie]

Oh, my God.

[Ben]

It's pronounced Brettini. It's like, no, I refuse. I'm never gonna call you that. That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. No.

[Ronnie]

What a dumb. Dumb. So anyway, so then the guest is like, hey, Fraser, do you think those jet skis are ready yet? He's like, I'll have a check for you. The answer will be no. But what I'll do is I'll walk away and then I'll be gone for 45 minutes and come back and you can ask again.

[Ben]

But the way Fraser does it, you know that the term, like, never let him see you sweat. You're just supposed to be sure. Let me check on that. I'll be right back. But Fraser's like, let me check for you. I'll be right back. Oh, my God, what are we gonna do? Is it working yet? Is it working yet? I've got people starving to death up here for entertainment. Look at Carl McLahan. He looks pathetic enough already. Can we please do something? The poor man. He hasn't been able to move his face since he's been here. Do something. All under control, everybody. It's all under control.

[Ronnie]

I'm running this chart on my own, it feels like, and I have to give the guests something, so fellatio it is.

[Ben]

So then you, Kyle, really chose the wrong week to a guest. I could have used his superpower today.

[Ronnie]

I know. So Hugo and Fraser on the swim platform. And Fraser's like, sam. So Hugo, they're saying, please, let's do something. And they've been asking me for three hours, and they really just want to get on a jet ski. But you've taken so long that now I have to propose a sunset cruise. Do you realize I'm proposing an evening activity before they even get to their afternoon activity? Do you understand this right now?

[Ben]

He goes like, I will take as long to do this as I take taking out the trash. Okay? I can guarantee you that. It's like, good. Thank you so much. Thank you so, so much.

[Ronnie]

So Fraser goes up, he's like, so I know you all asked for jet skis, but how would you like to do a sunset cruise in our tender instead? He proposes it like, oh, isn't this great? I'm like, that's 100 different than going on jet skis. I mean, it sounds fun, but, like, I would be like, wait, we just asked you for three hours. What about the jet skis? And you've been saying they're on their way, and now suddenly you're saying, saying we're going on the sunset cruise. I would not be.

[Ben]

Yeah, I didn't really understood. Understand this because we see them getting. What was their plan with. They were like, okay, we're gonna move the boat out into the middle of the water with ropes. And then that just didn't work. And so now the deck team is trying to come up with a way to move the boat further out. Like, how does this make any sense? This was bizarre. I didn't understand this.

[Ronnie]

I didn't understand it. Why did they not take them on an excursion throughout. Across the island somewhere? Like, they've done this stuff before. I don't understand why they. They just seemed like they were. They had no idea what to do in. In this sort of situation now.

[Ben]

They should have taken them around to the end of the island or something on the charter and, like, giving them snacks and drinks and then, like taking them out and then taking them on a tour of the town and ended up back at the other side or something. I don't know.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, snorkeling on the other end of the. The island or driven up one of the mountains or things like that. I don't know. I just feel like. Like there's a real lack of creativity going on here. So Fraser says, all right, tech crew aren't providing anything for us, so I'm going to do something. We're going on a sunset cruise together. Soane, she's like, what is cruise? I mean, I know Tom Cruise, but I really don't know Cruise. Like, cruise. What? Huh?

[Ben]

What? Huh? Okay. You work on a boat and you don't know what a cruise is? I mean, come on.

[Ronnie]

This is not an. Like, an ESL issue. This is you just fucking around.

[Ben]

Yeah. And he's like, well, you can have a break here. And she goes, no, I want to come. I want to see what is cool, what is. What is cruise. So, yeah, she's like, I'm thinking about this. I can't help it. But the more important for me is to be good at my job and be Norfolk also. She's so good at her job. Well, that ship is sailed, okay? That ship is cruised.

[Ronnie]

That cruise has. That cruise has sunken.

[Ben]

Yeah, okay? That cruise is carnival, okay? It's over.

[Ronnie]

Y. So they all get on the tender to go on their cruise. Then Anthony is reviewing the preference sheets, and he's having this, like, reverse Beautiful Mind moment. What's. What's the opposite of a Beautiful Mind? Ugly.

[Ben]

The numbers are, like, just going back into your head. He's like, what?

[Ronnie]

So many. So many things to look at. So then the guests are having a great time, and then Kyle. Kyle decides to call his Grandma Joyce, and she's like, okay, did you have a nice birthday? And she. He's like, no, I had a horrible birthday. I nearly got fired. Granny. She's all, behavior yourself.

[Ben]

Did you. Somebody. Kyle, just go ahead and tell me what you did. We know you stuck it in somebody. It's closer about that time, isn't it? Kyle, Kyle, keep it quick.

[Ronnie]

I'm having Fergus McDillicotti eating me out at the moment. Okay, Great.

[Ben]

Granny, his whole family. She's, like, drinking straight out of a whiskey bottle. She's like, get to it. Granny's gonna get some over here.

[Ronnie]

He's like, no, I'm not behaving myself. What is. What the problem is? So then we get Kyle one of first of his two Instagram walls. He got this episode. So Instagram walls. And Kyle's saying, growing up, me mom was a single parent on her own, so I kind of always finished school, and I'd either be on my own at the house or I'd be at the farm to go work. And I definitely was allowed to live free as a youngster. And I think that maybe being an only child and not having anybody to kind of check in on me and life probably didn't make some of the best decisions. And I never asked for help. I don't think I ever asked for help. Maybe I should. And we just see photos upon photos of him just looking like a pure disaster, like this guy, I'm sorry, he needs, first of all, to be showered. A shower would be a good place to start. And like, I don't know, I'm. I'm actually quite concerned about Kyle. I worry about his trajectory in life. It does not seem very good.

[Ben]

Yeah, it doesn't seem like the strongest trajectory. And he's been doing so well, I think for the most part this season, you know, I mean, he's been kind of crashing and burning over a chicken, but he hasn't been as crazy, fall down drunk and as messy as he's gotten on the past season where that was worrying. And this time he is, you know, he is. He is doing bad, but he's doing that thing that makes me crazy where he's like, maybe it is time I should ask for help. But first of all, you're only doing that after you got caught and got in trouble, so it doesn't really count. And then you just do it again in two seconds. So I don't know. But I do think he needs help. And, you know, you got to root for Kyle. He seems like a nice guy. He's just a disaster. Her.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, he seems nice. So Carrie gets a text. Guess what? The part, it's not going to ship until tomorrow. Pun intended. You know what? I didn't appreciate that pun right now. It's a serious situation, okay? Although now I think about, it's a pretty good pun. Shipping tomorrow.

[Ben]

So Fraser is like, oh, interior, interior, interior, please. This is very important. We need welcome drinks and tap cows. The guests get nothing. Do you understand what I'm saying? Nothing.

[Ronnie]

So now everyone's getting ready and then Ron and Denise are chatting. Denise is the one who wants to jump off the front of the yacht in her wedding dress, which, by the way, like, you deserve to have a broken boat because of this. So ron is like, 10 years ago. I mean, this is a stupid request.

[Ben]

No, I feel like this is the world being like, you're dumb. I feel like the world was like, you know what? We're sick of your stupid wedding post because this girl Denise has been posting about her wedding for 10 years. Okay? We all know it.

[Ronnie]

Yeah, we all know it. We all know that if Denise, if her. If, if, like, if Instagram were around when her kids, when she had her kids, you know, she would be up there make putting her kid on a beach with some seashells next to us being like, one week, two weeks, Two weeks, one day. Two weeks, two days. Like, we all need a fucking countdown.

[Ben]

Yeah, that's Denise So Ron's like, 10 years, by the way, Ronnie.

[Ronnie]

By the way, Ronnie, get excited, because as far as I can tell, It's August. It's August 19th today, which means we are about to enter prime. My kid is going back to school, so here he is holding a chalkboard to say what grade he's going into. Just get ready. Get ready.

[Ben]

Yeah, it's that time, huh? It's skinny time. Oh, my God, Ronnie.

[Ronnie]

You're like, I love it. I'm like, get rid of this.

[Ben]

I know, I do. I love it because I'm the one on all of those posts being like, God, oh, my. My God, you've grown so much. I just love you so much. It's from your uncle. Your real name is Rond. That's what they wanted to name you. Love you. Call me. You can come play PlayStation later. Can't wait. Sack boys are waiting.

[Ronnie]

I'm like, please post more content about character actresses. Thank you.

[Ben]

So Ron's like, 10 years ago today we got married, and you look as beautiful today as you did 10 years years ago. She's, oh, really? Well, you look more handsome today than you did 10 years ago. Really upped your Annie. Now what are you gonna say back to me? He's like, that's all I got.

[Ronnie]

He's like, actually, mine wasn't really a compliment. I was just trying to say I always thought you were gonna kind of like, raise your game once you were married to me, but you really haven't, so.

[Ben]

10 years ago, I married a midwife woman. And here I am 10 years later celebrating a midwoman. Wow. God. Things really don't change much, do they?

[Ronnie]

They said that once you, Once you marry a rich guy like me, she'll want to have plastic surgery. But she never put in that requests. So I just.

[Ben]

I have enough for the both of us, I guess. Denise catching strays. Denise is lovely, by the way.

[Ronnie]

Denise is actually, like, so. Actually honestly so pretty.

[Ben]

And we're just ragging on Denise. What would you say?

[Ronnie]

I think actually everyone's pretty nice on this charter. I think they're understandably miffed. I think that the tipping thing was. Was wrong. But they are, They're. They're generally pretty nice people. They just. Well, they're fake nice, I guess, because they don't tip. So Carrie is. Carrie joins for a drink. And he's like, in his, like, civilian clothes. And Denise is like, so do we have a status on the ship? And Ron is like, do we have a status on the plastic surgeon? Am I right? Carrie Right. Am I okay?

[Ben]

Carrot's like. All right, I've got good news. All right, I did get a package today. Bad news, it was not the boat part. All right, good news, it was a pair of Capris that fit me or I ordered from Amazon. Got them here in a day. Captain Sandy really needs to learn not to use Timu. Am I right? That was hilarious. So are we gonna leave on the boat today? No, you are going nowhere. All right. But I did have the boys put some letters in a bowl. You can pick them out and try to make words out of them. All right, that's the good news.

[Ronnie]

All right, we did find an old copy of Taboo. The buzzer doesn't quite work. It sort of sounds like a dying fly fly from the fly bridge. But it's fun. So if you want to say disappointment, you have to say it without using these five synonyms. Give it a try. Furious, upset. I called. You were really good at that. All right, I'm gonna pack up the Taboo.

[Ben]

All right, good news, I just got some good news. We've got a part in Miami, right? Bad news, this is not Miami. Me. All right, so I'm gonna go ahead and have the boys get out of Globe and show you just how far you are from the part, all right? All right.

[Ronnie]

Actually, we do. I did just get an email that apparently I did get a part. The bad news is it was a part in the local Fort Lauderdale production of Miss Saigon. So it was not quite the part that I think you were looking for. But that being said, why don't you all sit down and. And let me regal you with my roll.

[Ben]

What?

[Ronnie]

It's a gender.

[Ben]

All right, Sorry, sorry, sorry. Everybody sit down. Let me try that again. They call T moon the dust of life. Conceived in hell and born in strife. Right? You got it right.

[Ronnie]

All together now. The heat is on in Saigon. It is on in Saigon.

[Ben]

The cheeks are hotter in hell. That's like, my favorite cheesy Broadway moment. The heat is on in Saigon. The chicks are hotter in hell. That's always made me laugh. Every time I hear it, I crack up. The chicks are hotter in hell.

[Ronnie]

So mean.

[Ben]

No, not in hell, like, but the way they had to pronounce it because they're like, you're just. You're just army guys. We don't want you to say, you know. Then we want you to say, n. You know, they're like, the chicks are hotter in hell.

[Ronnie]

Oh, I thought you were saying, the chicks are hotter in hell, like, the heat is on, like, but man, the chicks are ugly here.

[Ben]

That's kind of why it's funny. They're saying the chicks are hotter than hell, but they're like, the chicks are hotter in hell. All.

[Ronnie]

The adventures on In Saigon production.

[Ben]

Listen, with everything that's been going on and as busy as I've been coming out of my room, from watching Netflix to telling the guests they're not getting. I mean, it's been exhausting. Mentally, I'm exhausted, but the least I could do is have dinner with them. I mean, that's what everybody wants, right? So I'm going to do it. I'm going to try and take away attention from the problem. Like, I'm a bull fighter. It's hilarious, right? Not the spear one, just this one. The one with the. With the flag.

[Ronnie]

Rainbow's like, mess with the rainbow, you get the horns. Am I right, Captain? Bulls. You know?

[Ben]

All right, it is time for dinner. Black truffle carbonara pasta. Best shift in the world.

[Ronnie]

And then meanwhile, Jess is like. Like, you guys have trash upstairs? Well, we actually have a really stupidly large bin of trash. I'll come in two seconds. Because taking trash out is the consequence of my action of deciding to be a dark. And. Oh, next time, I will not be a dark hand and deal with trash.

[Ben]

So I guess we're seeing that one person at least takes out trash. They're putting that in this episode, so we know. So not the second. Yeah, she's a deckhand. Yeah. One of the guests is like, so is this one of your favorite boats?

[Ronnie]

Does she take it out? Because she says, I'll come in two seconds, but she doesn't actually take it out.

[Ben]

I think she does. Right, because isn't it the chef's trash that's not getting taken out, or is it all the same trash?

[Ronnie]

It's the chef's trash, but the only person we ever see taking it out is Solane, actually.

[Ben]

Oh, okay. I didn't know this was the same trash. Okay, so this was to illustrate that she said she's gonna come, but she never comes. I see. Never mind, Jess. Never mind. I tried to give you a point there, but point rescinded. So one of the guests asks the captain if this is his favorite boat, because he works on a lot of boats, and he's like, not today, it's not. It's my most unfavorite boat. That's what it is today. All right. Wow. All right, bad news. All right, good news. I'm having dinner with you. Bad news. Wednesday has just come back on Netflix and I look that pigtailed little negative girl. So I only have half an hour to spend with you. All right.

[Ronnie]

So then, time for dessert. And Fraser says we want to congratulate you on your 10th wedding anniversary. To the stupid man. So this is called the Stoked for the Stokes because you are. You are the Stokes. That's your last name. Do I have to spell out every single stupid joke on the spot for you people?

[Ben]

We had for the Stokes but it sounded perverted so we've changed it to Stoked the Stokes.

[Ronnie]

I was going to call it Different Stokes make the world go round, but then I was worried that no one would actually get that. Anyone get that?

[Ben]

Now if anyone needs poked for the Stokes, we do have Carl on standby. He's hiding in the water toy bin. Anybody needs him. Oh, this is made with gold, love and chocolate. So they have gold wrapped things that they eat like. Oh my God, it's gold. Wow.

[Ronnie]

Hey everyone. This is the end of part one of this recap for part two. Keep an eye on your podcast feed. It is coming up in just a moment. Thanks so much for listening. Catch you on the second half. Watch what Crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alice and Ken King. It's always a party on Alice in.

[Ben]

Block Our way is the Amber way.

[Ronnie]

It's the Foster and the Furious. It's Amanda Foster. It's always automatic with Ashley Auto. Put your hands together for Carly Clap.

[Ben]

Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniella Etchels. We never miss her call.

[Ronnie]

It's Diane call Aaron mcnicholas she don't.

[Ben]

Miss no Trickolas Hava Nagila Weber.

[Ronnie]

You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones. I go, you go, we all go for Hugo Jamie, she has no less.

[Ben]

Namey she's our kind of mess. It's Jennifer Messer Sipped some scotch with.

[Ronnie]

Jessica Trot she's our favorite streamer.

[Ben]

Caroline Peacock, Kristen the Piston Anderson Get a bee in your bonnet with Lacey B. Que sera sera whatever will be. Will Lauren Sills be bringing the funk?

[Ronnie]

It's Leslie Plunkett, she gets a name.

[Ben]

From us It's Lindsey D. Let's give a Kisserino to Lisa Lino Fresh as a daisy. It's Maisie McHenry, we love her on the rocks it's Melissa Cox, Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the Berg.

[Ronnie]

This is living with Michelle Vivian.

[Ben]

I love Aya Olivia Williamson Tastier than Flanderson It's Rachel Manderson she sure is swell It's Raquel yes, we canna It's.

[Ronnie]

Savannah Cast a spot spell with Shannon Spellman let's share with Sharon Eldridge Darn.

[Ben]

Skippy, it's Tippy and our super premium sponsors She's VVIP It's Amanda V Can't lose when you're with Amy Baldwin somebody.

[Ronnie]

Get us 10cc's of Betsy MD we're.

[Ben]

Taking the gold with Brenda Silva let's.

[Ronnie]

Get real with Caitlin o' Neal don't.

[Ben]

Get salty with Christine Pepper can't have a meal without the Emily sides who, what, why, where? And Gwen Pentland let's go into the woods with Guy Tubbs it's our queen it's queen Laifa Nobody holds a candle.

[Ronnie]

To Jamie Kendall Hail the cork master the master of the cork Jennifer Corcoran we got our wish It's Jen Plish she's not harsh She's Jill Hirsch My Favorite Murdo Karen McMurdo we love him madly It's Kyle Pod Shadley in the study with a candlestick It's Leslie Peacock G It's Lisa H We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Baron she's a wiz It's Liz Sarthy always killing it.

[Ben]

It's Lola Alkalani the incredible edible Matthew sisters She eases our woes it's Melissa St. Rose there's a chance of meatballs It's Rebecca Cloud, neat. It's Ronit Feldman she's the queen bee It's Sarah Lemke we cannot tell a lie It's Sarah tell of son Shannon.

[Ronnie]

Out of a can. And Anthony, please don't stop at solely and pop let's take off with Tamla Plain.

[Ben]

It's always a good time when you're wasting time with Bravo. She ain't no shrinking violet couture. We love you guys. If you like, watch what crappens. You can listen ad free right now by joining Wondery in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short [e-mail] it's your man, Nick Cannon, and I'm here to bring you my new podcast, nick Cannon at night. I've heard y' all been needing some advice in the love department. So who better to help than yours truly? Nah, I'm serious. Every week I'm bringing out some of my celebrity friends and the best experts in the business to answer your most intimate relationship questions. Having problems with your man? We got you catching feelings for your sneaky link. Let's make sure it's the real deal for first Ready to bring toys into the bedroom? Let's talk about it. Consider this a non judgment zone to ask your questions when it comes to sex and modern dating in relationships, friendships, situationships and everything in between. It's gonna be sexy, freaky, messy. And you know what? You'll just have to watch the show. So don't be shy, join the conversation and head over to YouTube to watch Nick Cannon at night or subscribe on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcast. Want to watch episodes early and ad free? Join Wondery right now.